NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: Alright. I dont want random people joining my region, and i dont want tons of telegrams or anything. please. here we go.

Oh, and for those of you who dont know, and oligarchy is a country with three kings.

IC:

The Rise Of The M'Pire
In A large Skyscraper in the middle of The M'Pire's Capital City, The M'Pire's three Oligarchs Sit in thier Chairs. They are simply known by their first names, and not by any other things. They are Jake, Kyle, and Kevin. Jake stands up and goes over to the camera that the tech geeks are working on and mutters, "I knew we never should have given those technology people their raises! They're just a bunch of idiots."

"You must be patient with them," The wisest of them Kyle remarks.

"Well, we could have just temporarally created a hyperactive polaron field, creating an unstable vortex into the 4th dimension to get rid of them." The one named kevin remarks.

"Well, then the vortex would colapse within seconds, and we'd lose all power to the city, but it's not like we have that kind of technology yet." Jake remarks.

The two are about to continue when Kyle the wise says, "It is pointless to bicker about this. What's done is done."

Jake fixes the camera and sets it on a delay. He quickly takes his position in the middle of the two, and the broadcast to the rest of the world begins. In seperate floors of the tower, many translatore and techies edit the message and make sure it gets to every nation in the world.

A transcript of the procedings
ooc: J=jake k1=kevin k2=kyle
J: Hello nations of the world, we are The Oligarchs of The M'Pire.
K1: And we are declaring our conquest!
k2: You must stay calm kevin
k1: Okay, we were kidding
j: as I was saying. Many of you may think this type of leadership, an oligarchy, is primitive-
k1: and it's not, if we were to travel in the 4th dimension, you would find-
k2: Kevin, you must let jake finish his speech without interuptions, then you can rample on about other dimensions
j: thank you kyle. But our government is not primitive
Their War Advisor, davis, dances around like a monkey in the backround
j: We are an advanced nation, and we posess the power to crush all oppostion. All we wish is a say in the world, and a place in your "United Nations". We are a relatively new empire, and we had to defeat the Asbians and the CUnninghammonians to get here. but The M'Pire shal Prevail.
k1: what was the point of this message again?
j: you know, truly i have no idea.
k2: alright you guys, ill see you for lunch tomorrow, i have to go try and beat X-Men gends 2 before 9:00
j: you havent beat it yet?
k2: no, im still stuck in the madri Temple
j: oh, i already told you how to beat Exodus, right?
k2: yeah yeah yeah, see you later
j: bye
k1: but seriously, if we traveled in the fourth dimention, we would go .6452 times faster and-
j:wait a second, the camera is still on!
k2: THen turn it off!
j: I cant the button is stuck
Tech guy: Can you let us "idiots" turn it off
j: well if you can oven turn it of-
camera goes to static

ooc: Hey, you leaders out there can post what you think, for example a post about how your leader just saw the broadcast and he/she is baffled or something like that

The Next Day At Luch
The three oligarchs sit at lunch, eating their assorted foods, and discussing strategies on beating Apocalypse. "Well, We could send in troops," Kevin says

"No we couldnt, we dont have the resources, we already used them last level." Kyle says

"I told you, you should have used wolverine on the brain trust, not the army." Jake retorts

"It seemed like the appropriate strategy at the time." Kyle says

"I dont even have the game, and i wouldnt have used the army then" kevin says

They continue to discuss their strategies to beat the game, when suddlenly:

"Sir, The Super ASB of Death and The Cunningham have returned!" Their tactical advisor Davis rushes in.

"What!" All three shout at once

"Maybe they are here for tea and cookies?" Kyle asks.

"No sir, they are armed to the teeth." Davis continues "I believe we should mobilize the army, and call for help from neighboring regions."

"But we used the army in the last level!" Jake shouts

"That was X-Men Legends 2 Jake, not real life." Kyle says

"Oh, drat!" Jake says.

Jake slowly mutters under his breath, "1...2...3", and they all shout together "TO THE FORWARD COMMAND CENTER, TAKE US!!!"

"Yoda style!" Kevin shouts as they run to their command center.

FT Pananab
"Hey, Duke, come listen to this!"
Duke walked over and watched the video with Dan. They were a couple of teenagers in the Military and they had the luxery of their own com panels. Duke laughed.
"Hey, the Fourth Dimension? Match this frequency, I have an idea!"
"Okay!"
"Hey-Uh, MPire, huh-Yeah, you know how you're traveling on the Fourth Dimension? Yeah, well, so are your transmissions and, uh, we can hear you in the Twenty-Sixth Century, so, like, SHUT THE FUCK UP WE'RE TRYING TO SLEEP! Heh. Yeah. That was good. Send it."

The three Oligarchs sit in their large chairs, as Davis breifs them on the situation. "The Super ASB of Death and The Cunninghamos joined together to form the Allied states of evil. They are amassing on our borders. And-" He was cut off by a transmission from two soldiers.

"That was odd." Kyle says

"Yeah, and our transmission isnt even in the third dimension." Kevin says. "In order to do that-"

"We dont care right now kevin. Davis, Scramble the jets and do some cool manuevers and stuff, and show the Allied States of Evil that we mean buisiness!" Jake shouts

"And get us a camera view!" Kyle shouts.

The Three oigarchs sit in front of their large plasma fullscreen TV. "Techie! Rig us up 3 planes that fly on GameCube Controllers, and put cameras on them, i have an idea!" Jake shouts

A Techie comes over with three controllers, and a triple size modifed Super GameCube Deluxe. He hooks it up to the TV and Inserts the game 'MPIRE PLANE JET REMOTE CONTROL THINGAMABOBER' and turns it on. The three oligarchs then fly around, acting like its a video game.

After several hours, the allied states of evil go back to the evil land from whence they came, and they are gone.