NationStates Jolt Archive

Breaking news from the Huahinian Broadcasting Corporation

Huahinian ships have just started an operation to claim the uninhabited island of Rockall for Huahin. The current situation involves one man, a small boat, and a lot of rock climbing equipment. Sources in the military indicate this island may possibly have some importance, although this claim is widely denounced. Enemy forces include the weather, boredom and lonliness.

End transmission

Operation Pebble Grab

Rubber Dinghy * 1
Special Forces Soldier * 1

The Divine Empire of Kreynoria will airdrop supplies to your one-man army if necessary.

Azimeth, if necessary, will send B-21A Equator Stealth Long Range Bombers to blow the shit out of the island if you feel the necessity to climb over rubble instead of mile-high 90 degree cliffs.

Yours very sincerely and respectfully,
Emperor Jacob Komech II

We welcome all offers of help in this adventurous mission. Current reports indicate that our man has finally found flat land, and has hoisted the Huahinian Flag aloft for all to see. Sovereignty of this island has been claimed.

An aerial flyover showed the Huahinian soldier. The pilot of the Be-23 Archimedes' Lever transport plane waved down to him.

Out of the cargo hatch dropped down two weeks' supply of food (at Kreynorian ration level) and water, a portable TV and radio, and some other miscellaneous equipment.

"Commander, we may have a situation on our hands," said the pilot. The commander sighed.

"What did you do this time?"

The pilot pointed at a small object. Only it wasn't an object. It was a big, ugly, hairy man, with a giant wood-and-stone club.

"Contact that Huahinian soldier. Tell him to be on the lookout for a possibly hostile native."

At that moment, a seabird defecated on the canopy. "Why did the Huahinians even want this rock!?"

Gruk sat on a carved stone, whittling on a stick with a knife he had made from a shark's tooth. He had come to the island several years before on a handcrafted boat to flee from the horrors of a war back home in his primitive society. His wife and children had drowned and his boat had been destroyed by great waves. His life was saved by a dolphin, which carried him to Rockall Island.

Over the years, he had built himself a little hut and shrine to the dolphin that had saved his life. But little did he realize, his life was about to be permanently changed.

Gruk looked up in the sky. In all his time on the island, he'd never heard the sound of this particular bird (in this case a jet engine). He walked over to a high rock to get a better view.

His eyes widened as he looked upon the airplane. What was it? Then its belly opened up and several objects hanging from big white skins fell out of it.

Ooh oh ee gon dun muk! (It must be a god!), exclaimed Gruk.

Ik ok unk oh myk! Flurk dun dome! (Maybe it is food, or people! I must go see!)

The primitive man expertly scrambled down a rock ledge, hefting his club behind him. A few short climbs brought him up on a ledge, looking down at some kind of person.

Gruk had never seen clothes like his before, and his skin was pale white, and he had a long, narrow, shiny stick.

Uk gok moh oh fo tu solm po po! Ett skik ug Gruk. Blen ton to rakku? (This is my island, man with skin of breaking waves. My name is Gruk. Why do you come here?) he said, pointing an accusing club.

At first it was believed that this soldier was Dutch, from the primitive language he used, but soon after it was realised he was a native. The lone Huahinian soldier stood confused, but after watching many films, he thought of the solution. He reached in to his pocket, and then extended his hand towards the native, revealing a chocolate bar.

Gruk flinched as the soldier extended his hand. But then he saw the small dark object in the stranger's palm. He took it off slowly, sniffingthe bar and rubbing it against the side of his mouth. Finally, he determined that it was safe to eat and chewed on it. It tasted sweet, and brought back memories of his old home, before the wars.Ook nort bok ooh kit? (do you have more of this god-food?)