NationStates Jolt Archive

Yes. It's true. We are renewing the leases on all embassies in within Camel Eaters. Nations who'd like an embassy must fill out the form below:

Name of Nation:
Name of Ambassador:
Number of Guards within Embassy:
Current Standing with Camel Eaters:
Whisky or Vodka:
Economic Conventions:
No fat chicks?:
Religion:
Do you have a hot wife:
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly:
Guns or ammo:
Guns or illegitimate sons:
Blue:
Favorite color:
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon:
How about a spork or even a knife:
Do you like bread:
Social Security Number:
Nation Population:
Do you eat pork on a regular basis:
What about venison or haggis:
What's illegal in your nation:
Ever killed a man with a car:
SUV:
Tank:
Do you watch TV:
What are you wearing right now:

And so on and so forth. Embassies are welcomed to all who apply and meet our standards. Our closest allies have first pick of the ambassadorial grounds. Yes Lenny, ambassadorial is a word. Now type it or else.

Closest Allies:
Maghda-
The Parthians
Generic Empire
Borman Empire
Upper Xen
MassPwnage
The Emperor Fenix

Come on you bastards! Apply and stuff.

Embassies and stuff:
Templa
Fenix
Upper Xen
Credonia
Nation of Fortune
The Parthians
Ottoman Khaif
Velkya
The Great Sixth Reich
Cyas
Verghastinsel
Roach-Busters/Maghda
Thergo
Willink
Generic fukin' Empire
Roman Republic
MassPwnage (Don't expect us to provide lizard food)
Bonstock
The Transylvania

Name of Nation: Templa
Name of Ambassador: Col. (ret) Max Carver
Number of Guards within Embassy: 50
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: None that I know of
Whisky or Vodka: Its not either or, you mix them.
Economic Conventions: I dunno.
No fat chicks?: No
Religion: Christian majority
Do you have a hot wife: I'm single
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jenna Jameson
Guns or ammo: ammo
Guns or illegitimate sons: guns
Blue: eulB
Favorite color: Green
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: 72, in fact
How about a spork or even a knife: 3 and 7, respectively
Do you like bread: Yes
Social Security Number: XXX-XX-XXXX
Nation Population: 909 Mil
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: somewhat
What about venison or haggis: venison
What's illegal in your nation: Alot that probably shouldn't be
Ever killed a man with a car: 12
SUV: 82
Tank: With the same tank, or just how many in general?
Do you watch TV: Not daytime TV
What are you wearing right now: Work pants, t-shirt, grey hoody.

Name of Nation: The Emperor Fenix
Name of Ambassador: Lord Daraasi
Number of Guards within Embassy: 15
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Closer than a granny and her tampon
Whisky or Vodka: Neither
Economic Conventions: N/A
No fat chicks?: Certainly
Religion: Buddhist
Do you have a hot wife: Close but no cigar
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Cut them in half an ill take a third of each
Guns or ammo: Guns
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Eww No :D
Favorite color: Black Gold or Purple
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Came close with a fork, does that count ?
How about a spork or even a knife: No :'(
Do you like bread: Yes
Social Security Number: I dont remember it
Nation Population: 4.75 billion or something
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: No
What about venison or haggis: Vension when i can get it
What's illegal in your nation: Nothing, except maybe murder
Ever killed a man with a car: Close
SUV: No
Tank: No
Do you watch TV: Yes
What are you wearing right now: Clothes

Templa is in. You shall have an embassy on Embassy Row! How original my name for that is!

Fenix shall also have an embassy! And it shall be slightly cooler than Templa's!

Yay!

Yay!
Bump!

Name of Nation: Upper Xen
Name of Ambassador: Thomas Lew-Hayakawa
Number of Guards within Embassy: 25
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Friendly
Whisky or Vodka: Whiskey. Jim Beam Whiskey
Economic Conventions: Mixed Economy
No fat chicks?: Yes
Religion: Xenizen Baptist, or the loving tolerant branch of Christiantity that allows for thought.
Do you have a hot wife: Oh. yeah. But I am not sharing.
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jenna Jameson
Guns or ammo: Ammo
Guns or illegitimate sons: guns
Blue: indigo blue
Favorite color: see above
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: no, but I may know a few guys that did.
How about a spork or even a knife: Probably
Do you like bread: yup
Social Security Number: Do I have to?
Nation Population: About 3 billion Plus
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Yes
What about venison or haggis: Nope
What's illegal in your nation: Hard drugs, many types of soft drugs (except marijuana, this is taxed to death), National Communism, Military Explosives (for civilians), Nazi Propaganda, lolicon and other forms of child abuse, Marilyn Manson, not paying the many taxes we have, not going to school, corruption, smuggling, agitation to violence against other ethnic groups, RALM Propaganda (anime itself is okay-except for lolicon-, but we don't like the RALM), murder (especially of a Borderworlder), etc.*
Ever killed a man with a car: No.
SUV: Cadillac Escalade
Tank: None
Do you watch TV: Yup, History Channel, Adult Swim
What are you wearing right now: Loud Camo pants, T-shirt

Ambassadorial

*This is a shortlist. Many things also have heavy taxes on them. HOOAH!

VOILA INTRUDER!

You're in! And on the close ally road as well. Not the surrounding embassies that are just buffers for the close ally embassies........hehe. Jus' funnin'

Name of Nation: Credonia
Name of Ambassador: Joseph McDougal
Number of Guards within Embassy: 15
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Good
Whisky or Vodka: Vodka
Economic Conventions: Free-Market Economy
No fat chicks?: low obesity rate in Credonia
Religion:
Do you have a hot wife: No, single
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jenna Jameson
Guns or ammo: both
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Baby Blue
Favorite color: Baby blue
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: no
How about a spork or even a knife: no
Do you like bread: yes
Social Security Number: 999-99-1110
Nation Population: 3 bill+
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: no
What about venison or haggis: no
What's illegal in your nation: most things immoral
Ever killed a man with a car: no
SUV: no
Tank: of course...this is credonia we're talking about here
Do you watch TV: when i have time
What are you wearing right now: clothes

You're In!

Name of Nation: The Plutocratic Shahdom of the Parthians
Name of Ambassador: Lord Shapur Khorbeh
Number of Guards within Embassy: 100
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Ally
Whisky or Vodka: Whiskey
Economic Conventions: Ultra Right wing lassez-faire free market
No fat chicks?: None, they sicken me
Religion: Zoroastrian
Do you have a hot wife: I have five hot wives
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: No idea, I don't listen to much music but Iranian music
Guns or ammo:You can't have one without the other, but I have much more Ammo
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Ocean Blue
Favorite color: Tan
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No
How about a spork or even a knife: About a dozen Shoobans, if that counts
Do you like bread: Of course
Social Security Number: Whats social security?
Nation Population: 3.8 billion or so
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: on occasion
What about venison or haggis:Venison yes, haggis no
What's illegal in your nation: Well.... (Capital offenses: ) Murder, rape, kidnapping, mugging or violent theft, carjacking, Communism, spreading false information against the government, supporting leftist political parties, treason, vandalism, arson, disobeying military orders, supporting freeing slaves, owning certain books, singing Internationale, burning a Parthian or allied flag, disrespecting a member of the armed forces, terrorism, owning a weapon purchased or imported illegally, advocating policies heavily contrary to the Parthian government. (Offenses carrying a possible capital punishment, but otherwise by enslavement for a certain number of years: ) Theft or home burglary (where damage or amount stolen was greater than $500 is always a capital offense), espionage (where spy was a Parthian citizen is a capital offense), illegally immigrating (if smuggling at the same time it is a capital offense), wearing a Che t-shirt (If in view of children or at protests it is a capital offense), manslaughter (only capital if it is a non-citizen who committed manslaughter), striking (leading a strike is a capital offense). (Offenses that Carry lesser charges: ) Driving offenses (almost always just a fine)
Ever killed a man with a car: No
SUV: No
Tank: About a dozen Shoobans
Do you watch TV: Yes
What are you wearing right now: Most Extreme Shooban Elimination Challenge

Name of Nation:
The Mercenary State of Nation of Fortune

Name of Ambassador:
Maxwell Edison

Number of Guards within Embassy:
More than enough

Current Standing with Camel Eaters:
Pretty good as far as I know, you tell me

Whisky or Vodka:
Whiskey all the way

Economic Conventions:
indifference

No fat chicks?:
Never, there are no fat chicks, and if there are, they are worked into shape

Religion:
None

Do you have a hot wife:
Yes, She's my cute little silver hammer.

Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly:
Jenna

Guns or ammo:
A giant silver hammer

Guns or illegitimate sons:
MY FATHER LOVED ME!

Blue:
Green?

Favorite color:
red, blood red.....

Have you ever killed a man with a spoon:
Yes, although I prefer my hammer

How about a spork or even a knife:
Yes, but I still prefer the hammer

Do you like bread:
Especially soda bread

Social Security Number:
Whats that?

Nation Population:
>2 Billion

Do you eat pork on a regular basis:
When available

What about venison or haggis:
Tough one, I'd say haggis though

What's illegal in your nation:
Good question, just don't piss off the military (Which is just about everyone)

Ever killed a man with a car:
Of course, although the hammer has much more effect

SUV:
death to them all

Tank:
yes, watch me run the little bastards down, although the hammer is much more personal

Do you watch TV:
No

What are you wearing right now:
A green shirt, with utility trousers. A giant silver hammer slung over my back, and a pistol on my belt

You're in. Really, really in. Cause you have public nudity be legal yo.

Name of Nation: Khailfah al Muslimeen
Name of Ambassador: William Maxwell
Number of Guards within Embassy:10
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Good
Whisky or Vodka: Both at the same time..
Economic Conventions:Mixed Econ
No fat chicks?:HELL NO.
Religion: Don't know...last time I was in Church..they kick me for smoking cigers..
Do you have a hot wife: YES ....wait I was drunk..nevermind..
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Don't know
Guns or ammo:Guns
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: What?
Favorite color:Black
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon:Yes, in prison and for fun..
How about a spork or even a knife: yes, its more fun with a spork..
Do you like bread:YES
Social Security Number: Don't know...never got one
Nation Population: 3.615 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: nope
What about venison or haggis: yes to venison, and haggis once in a while
What's illegal in your nation: Drugs, Rapes...I don't keep track of this stuff..
Ever killed a man with a car: Yes many times..
SUV:nope
Tank:nope
Do you watch TV: Yes, I watch...Monty Python
What are you wearing right now: A shirt saying " I am going to kill you.."

You're in.

Name of Nation:
Allied Union of Velklya
Name of Ambassador:
MC 49 Cent
Number of Guards within Embassy:
14
Current Standing with Camel Eaters:
Neutural
Whisky or Vodka:
Vodka
Economic Conventions:
Huh?
No fat chicks?:
Ohhh yeah, blubber.
Religion:
Scientoligist
Do you have a hot wife:
Yeah, your mother!
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly:
BOTH!
Guns or ammo:
Guns!
Guns or illegitimate sons:
ILLEGITIMATE SONS!
Blue:
YES!
Favorite color:
Magenta
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon:
Yes.
How about a spork or even a knife:
No.
Do you like bread:
Yes.
Social Security Number:
345-FUCK-YOU
Nation Population:
781 million
Do you eat pork on a regular basis:
Yes!
What about venison or haggis:
Yes!
What's illegal in your nation:
Running naked with an Ak-47 through a church on sunday.
Ever killed a man with a car:
Nope.
SUV:
Does a Humvee count?
Tank:
Yep.
Do you watch TV:
Yep.
What are you wearing right now:
ANimal Skin.

Whoo!

Name of Nation: The Republican Monocracy of The Great Sixth Reich
Name of Ambassador: Wolfgang Rein Cosmo Wiebe Sascha Hienkel
Number of Guards within Embassy: Sixty
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Spitze!
Whisky or Vodka: As long as it's German...
Economic Conventions: Capitalist
No fat chicks?: Jawohl! No fat chicks!
Religion: Church of TG6R (Hienkelist)
Do you have a hot wife: Ja.
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jill Kelly
Guns or ammo: Ammo
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Ja.
Favorite color: Blau
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Nein
How about a spork or even a knife: Nein
Do you like bread: Ja
Social Security Number: jUuK97PE2kX7C26$AzWaAs26b4a2e3699cc4abb66b1d7c617b4061$$$@!
Nation Population: 3.14 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Nein
What about venison or haggis: Nein
What's illegal in your nation: A lot (including substituting "ss" for "ß")
Ever killed a man with a car: Nein
SUV: Nein
Tank: Ja
Do you watch TV: Ja
What are you wearing right now: Satellite images of Camel Eaters on a T-Shirt. :)

WHOO!

You're in.

Name of Nation: Cyas
Name of Ambassador: Melvachore
Number of Guards within Embassy: 23
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Unknown
Whisky or Vodka: Both
Economic Conventions: Sure
No fat chicks?: Sure
Religion: Where?
Do you have a hot wife: I'm the emperor why not?
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: All of the above?
Guns or ammo: Ammo
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: See below
Favorite color: See above
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Voluntarily or Invoulantarily (No)
How about a spork or even a knife: Several times.
Do you like bread: Yep
Social Security Number: *numbers*
Nation Population: 1.138 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Not really
What about venison or haggis: Nope
What's illegal in your nation: Define the term illegal.
Ever killed a man with a car: Yep
SUV: Do protestors count as people?
Tank: Repeat above question.
Do you watch TV: Yep
What are you wearing right now: Fine political ceremonial garments

Whoo!

Name of Nation: The Republik of Verghastinsel
Name of Ambassador: I. R. Unreal
Number of Guards within Embassy: 32.5
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Who are they?
Whisky or Vodka: Vodka.
Economic Conventions: N/A
No fat chicks?: You know it.
Religion: http://www.evilbible.com/what_would_jesus_do.htm
Do you have a hot wife: Unmarried.
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: The girl from the reverse charges ad.
Guns or ammo: Ammo.
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns, I already have ammo.
Blue: Whoa!
Favorite color: Green.
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: He was asking for it.
How about a spork or even a knife: There is no spork.
Do you like bread: Bread is nice.
Social Security Number: I can't remember.
Nation Population: One man, and a dog.
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: No.
What about venison or haggis: I don't like haggis.
What's illegal in your nation: Killing people.
Ever killed a man with a car: I wasn't looking so it doesn't count.
SUV: TEN POINTS!
Tank: I once watched the Tienamen Square thing.
Do you watch TV: Surprisingly little.
What are you wearing right now: Dressing gown and boxers.

wHOO!

Way to go boyo and the like and stuff.

Yo, CE my nizzle, what's wit dat shizzle all up in my grizzle?

But seriously, I thought I was one of your allies...

*shoots self in foot, yelps in pain, shoots bystander in balls*

Name of Nation: Roach-Busters
Name of Ambassador: Joseph 'Camel Joe' Ass
Number of Guards within Embassy: 20
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Close ally, fellow member of CAD
Whisky or Vodka: Neither-nor
Economic Conventions: Huh?
No fat chicks?: Huh?
Religion: None
Do you have a hot wife: No
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Huh?
Guns or ammo: Hmmm...
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Huh?
Favorite color: Ummm...pink!
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No, not yet.
How about a spork or even a knife: No.
Do you like bread: Yes, with grape jelly, pickle juice, nacho cheese, salsa, maple syrup, and chocolate syrup smothered on it.
Social Security Number: None
Nation Population: Over 3 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Depends
What about venison or haggis: Nope
What's illegal in your nation: Too many things to list
Ever killed a man with a car: Not yet
SUV: What about it?
Tank: Huh?
Do you watch TV: Rarely
What are you wearing right now: Nothing

WHOO!

And to Freudo................it's really close allies. Like people who are related to a clan or have been allies with us for quite some time. Still an ally though.
Bitch.

Name of Nation: The Commonwealth of Thergo
Name of Ambassador: Alek J. Blain
Number of Guards within Embassy: 50 soldiers
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Aquanticened
Whisky or Vodka: Yes please
Economic Conventions: N/A
No fat chicks?: I hate fat chicks <_>
Religion: MMORPGian
Do you have a hot wife: Hell no
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Sure
Guns or ammo: Guns
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Hell no
Favorite color: Orange
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No. I almost choked a baby with one!
How about a spork or even a knife: No
Do you like bread: Yeah sure
Social Security Number: How about this: Kiss my ass.
Nation Population: 121 Million
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Yeah
What about venison or haggis: Venison f00 sh00
What's illegal in your nation: Drugs, murder, rape, rap music, being a giant asshole, capital punishment [except for war crimes], tax evading, robbery, money laundering, racaktering, and so on.
Ever killed a man with a car: No, I killed a cat and a deer with one.
SUV: Why in the HELL would I want to drive an SUV
Tank: BWHAHAHAHAHA..eh...no
Do you watch TV: Hell yes
What are you wearing right now: Plain orange shirt, Black jeans, Cammo hoody.

Your in.

Im allready allied with you through UNA, but here:

Name of Nation: Willink
Name of Ambassador: Jared Scott
Number of Guards within Embassy: 2 Bakers dozens
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Allied
Whisky or Vodka: Both
Economic Conventions: I dont remeber
No fat chicks?: Yep
Religion: All of em
Do you have a hot wife: Um, sure
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jameson
Guns or ammo: Guns
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: its gay
Favorite color: Green
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Too many to count
How about a spork or even a knife: Yep
Do you like bread: Yes
Social Security Number: I dont remeber
Nation Population: 1. somthin billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: i cant remeber
What about venison or haggis: i dont know
What's illegal in your nation: Nothing
Ever killed a man with a car: Exactly 12, injured 23
SUV: no
Tank: Over 800
Do you watch TV: Yes
What are you wearing right now: Sean john pants, dress shirt.

There ya go, BAH !

Mhm.

Name of Nation: Roman Republic
Name of Ambassador: Ranjit Srivastava
Number of Guards within Embassy: 13
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Unknown
Whisky or Vodka: Hell no, Indian Beer from India
Economic Conventions: Unknown
No fat chicks?: Ofcourse, no fat women
Religion: Hindu
Do you have a hot wife: Yes
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Both, if they are Indians
Guns or ammo: Both
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Yes
Favorite color: Blue
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No
How about a spork or even a knife: A knife, a Marine multi-purpose bayonet
Do you like bread: Yes with Orange marmalade jam.
Social Security Number: Classified
Nation Population: 3.7 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: No
What about venison or haggis: No
What's illegal in your nation: Anything the President makes that is illegal
Ever killed a man with a car: No
SUV: 10
Tank: Saw an Abrams MBT crushing a Catholic rebel
Do you watch TV: Some of the time
What are you wearing right now: Army dress uniform with my saber, pistol, and a bayonet

Name of Nation: Generic Fuckin' Empire
Name of Ambassador: Nikolai "Nikko" McBrain
Number of Guards within Embassy: 20
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: pretty damn decent
Whisky or Vodka: both, often, and in excess
Economic Conventions: uber capitalist, 'you break it you bought it'
No fat chicks?: depends on my mood
Religion: Baav Sart, Generian Orthodox, Freudian Orthodox
Do you have a hot wife: No. Do you? Where is she? What's her number?
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Porn.
Guns or ammo: Cavalry saber.
Guns or illegitimate sons: My illegitimate sons pack serious heat.
Blue: Blue.
Favorite color: Black.
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No. It was a spork.
How about a spork or even a knife: Aye, there we go.
Do you like bread: Yes.
Social Security Number: 911
Nation Population: 3 and some odd billion. Yes, I could eat you without even opening my mouth.
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: No.
What about venison or haggis: mmmm.
What's illegal in your nation: Badmouthing G'N'f'n'R's
Ever killed a man with a car: No. That's against the rules.
SUV: No. Why would I risk scratching my SUV?
Tank: Hell yeah.
Do you watch TV: Aye.
What are you wearing right now: Pants of some comfortable fabric. A necklace made from bear claws. Yes, bear claws. That is to say delicious pastries.

Roman Republic.......you're in. Y'all would prolly like Texas. We're Indiafying it!

Generia........duh. You're in. Would you like fries with that?

Name of Nation: The Heavily Armed Hippies of MassPwnage

Name of Ambassador: Gerald Redham

Number of Guards within Embassy: 567th Imperial Guard Infantry Battalion
(850 men), the more the merrier, besides, 99% of the time, these guys are going to be drunk off their asses holding public orgies in the embassy courtyard.

Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Nukes pointed at you? What nukes? I don't see any nukes?

Whisky or Vodka: Good question. Give me a couple bottles of each and I'll decide later.

Economic Conventions: If it's not nailed down (or can be pried loose), it's not theft.

No fat chicks?: No. Just no.

Religion: Is that some kind of energy drink?

Do you have a hot wife: She used to be hot until her tits started sagging... *ARGH!* QUIT BEATING ME WITH THAT TIRE IRON!!!! *ARGH!*

Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Yes please.

Guns or ammo: Ditto.

Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns, I already have too many illegitimate sons.

Blue: Past Tense of Blow.

Favorite color: Whatever color the negative result of a paternity test is.

Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: There is no spoon.

How about a spork or even a knife: There is no spork either. The existence of knives hasn't been proven yet.

Do you like bread: Got rice bitch?

Social Security Number: For a good time, call 439-339-3311.

Nation Population: No idea. Our census takers tend to turn up dead in the strangest of places.

Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Sure, I'll take some.

What about venison or haggis: Well one time.... I took a bite from some roadkill....

What's illegal in your nation: Everything, last time I checked.

Ever killed a man with a car: Sure.

SUV:Doesn't that fall under the category of cars?

Tank: I strangled a man with a woman's tank top before.

Do you watch TV: No.

What are you wearing right now: Fuck off pervert.

Name of Nation: Bonstock
Name of Ambassador: Usuqa M'Diq
Number of Guards within Embassy: 24
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Virtually unknown, but would like to establish trading contacts
Whisky or Vodka: Vodka, comrade! And lots of it!
Economic Conventions: Capitalist
No fat chicks?: No white chicks either
Religion: "I-don't-give-a-damnism!"
Do you have a hot wife: We call them concubines
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Whichever one is sexier
Guns or ammo: One Kalashnikov with a bayonet
Guns or illegitimate sons: Information Classified
Blue: What?
Favorite color: Blood red
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: We're much more civilized... we use chopsticks to kill people
How about a spork or even a knife: No... a chopstick does the trick
Do you like bread: Since besides rice it composes of our entire diets (unless we're rich), yes.
Social Security Number: Social Security doesn't exist in Bonstock.
Nation Population: Over 5 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: If I'm rich
What about venison or haggis: say what?
What's illegal in your nation: Rape and murder without a permit (which all soldiers carry)
Ever killed a man with a car: I don't drive cars... only SUVs
SUV: Not that I know of, but blood keeps appearing on my tires whenever I pass an elementary school zone
Tank: No, I was in the Bonstocknian Air Force
Do you watch TV: It's the opiate of our people
What are you wearing right now: Clothes

I do still have my embassy, right? Ambassador Benvolio Capulet is my man in the embassy.

Everyone is approved. And also........you must fill out the form in order to obtain an embassy.

bump

Everyone is approved. And also........you must fill out the form in order to obtain an embassy.

Well…I got my embassy in your other embassy thread. So…do I have to fill out the form?

Yes.

The landlord died so all leases have to be renewed.

Yes.

The landlord died so all leases have to be renewed.

Name of Nation: The Dominion of the Transylvania

Name of Ambassador: Ambassador Benvolio Capulet

Number of Guards within Embassy: 15 Former Dominion soldiers of the 12th Blood Dragons (http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y101/CountJWolf/12th.jpg) (Captain Wolfe Darkarm, the leader of the Embassy Guards at the Transylvanian Embassy ), 20 drunk little people, 400 pound Sumo wrestler named Tiny and two guys play Halo 2 24/7.

Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Camel Eaters? Who is that? Oh…yeah, those people. Camel Eaters are cool people.

Whisky or Vodka: WHISKY!!!!

Economic Conventions: Not going to said a thing.

No fat chicks?: Nope, never had a thing for a fat chick.

Religion: To many to list

Do you have a hot wife: Hell…yeah, got six hot wives.

Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Don’t need any of them, got six hot wives.

Guns or ammo: You will need both to work the gun right unless you’re talking about another gun.

Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns make the world spin.

Blue: I love the color blue.

Favorite color: BLUE!!!

Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Yes, I have killed a man with a spoon. Spoons are good to dig out people’s eyes or brains.

How about a spork or even a knife: A couple of times.

Do you like bread: Don’t like human food but if the bread is hard, I can kill somebody with it.

Social Security Number: 555-7777-9999

Nation Population: 1.5 billion and some change

Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Don’t eat human food but pig blood is tasty.

What about venison or haggis: Don’t eat human food!!!

What's illegal in your nation: Nothing but Barney videos and bikinis for woman.

Ever killed a man with a car: To many times to list.

SUV: Good for running over fat men.

Tank: Good for running over fatter men and crashing into a building that has 1,000 female virgins in. Got to get in there somehow!!!

Do you watch TV: Yes.

What are you wearing right now: A blue speedo.

*Form filled out by the God-Emperor Count JWolf*

Name of Nation: The Most Manly Empire of Camel Eaters

Name of Ambassador: Kickin' Chicken Moodring Baby

Number of Guards within Embassy: 12 good Sawneys

Current Standing with Camel Eaters: We are Camel Eaters

Whisky or Vodka: WHOO!

Economic Conventions: Capitalist to a fault. Hey kid wanna buy some candy?

No fat chicks?: Nothing against 'em.

Religion: Monotheist

Do you have a hot wife: Someday

Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Sure

Guns or ammo: ammo

Guns or illegitimate sons: I could use a few less bastards.

Blue: Is made of babies.

Favorite color: Green

Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: No but my guards have.

How about a spork or even a knife: Probably those too.

Do you like bread: Mh-fucking-m

Social Security Number: BLUE!

Nation Population: 2.645 Billion or somesuch

Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Fuck no. It's illegal in Camel Eaters

What about venison or haggis: HAGGIS!

What's illegal in your nation: The standard plus, pork, illegal cannibalism, seperation from one's clan, wrestling a Sawney without a permit, owning an SUV.

Ever killed a man with a car: Yes sir. He deserved it.

SUV: SUV's are illegal

Tank: Tanks aren't though.

Do you watch TV: Sometimes

What are you wearing right now: Nothing. It's Camel Eaters and it's warm.

Yes.......Tranns is in.

Ba-ump

Name of Nation: Omigodtheykilledkenny
Name of Ambassador: Mark Reyes
Number of Guards within Embassy: One magic pixie (being exiled because our macho president thought it threatened our nation's manliness)
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: None. But we got no problem with y'all.
Whisky or Vodka: Whiskey is a man's drink. Vodka is for sissies.
Economic Conventions: Capitalist
No fat chicks?: Umm, so if I answer "yes," does that mean "Yes, no fat chicks," or "Yes, fat chicks!!"; or if I say no, does that mean, "No, no fat chicks!" or "No, fat chicks"?? Or whatever.
Religion: Christian (which seems oddly taboo on these forums)
Do you have a hot wife: There are plenty of hot wives in our nation. Here (http://elisha.primenova.com/maxim/photo_020.jpg)'s one.
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Jenna
Guns or ammo: Guns
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: The sky
Favorite color: Obviously red
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Nope. Prefer my bare hands.
How about a spork or even a knife: Ugh. Too pointy. Makes too much of a mess.
Do you like bread: Not rye
Social Security Number: 4,376,541. The number of our active-duty military personnel. (Makes me feel secure.)
Nation Population: 1.479 billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Sure
What about venison or haggis: Whatever floats your boat
What's illegal in your nation: If I told you, it would only make you want to do it more.
Ever killed a man with a car: Funny. I never ask if they have a car before I kill 'em.
SUV: Ya know what the most annoying thing on Earth is? A soccer mom, yapping on her cell phone behind the wheel of her SUV. So, instead of banning SUVs or even cell phones, we've gone right to the source. We've banned soccer moms.
Tank: We got lots of them in our army.
Do you watch TV: Yes. I just finished watching "Family Guy."
What are you wearing right now: A smile

Please note, we assume diplomacy to be a two-way street. We cannot establish an embassy in your nation until you also agree to establish one in ours. To do so, please visit Kenny's One-Stop Diplomacy Shop! (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=454422)

Name of Nation: The Ruthless Imperium of Freudotopia
Name of Ambassador: Rasputin the Bald
Number of Guards within Embassy: 75
Current Standing with Camel Eaters: Pretty damn good
Whisky or Vodka: Yes please
Economic Conventions: Money
No fat chicks?: Of course not
Religion: Freudian Orthodoxy
Do you have a hot wife: Three of them, actually
Jenna Jameson or Jill Kelly: Both…at the same time
Guns or ammo: As always, my main weapon is FEAR
Guns or illegitimate sons: Guns
Blue: Meh
Favorite color: Red
Have you ever killed a man with a spoon: Currently on trial for that particular homicide
How about a spork or even a knife: Fifty-three total, and counting
Do you like bread: Obviously
Social Security Number: 000-00-0000
Nation Population: 3.314 Billion
Do you eat pork on a regular basis: Absolutely
What about venison or haggis: Both
What's illegal in your nation: Everything that needs to be
Ever killed a man with a car: Once
SUV: Twice
Tank: All the fuckin’ time
Do you watch TV: All the fuckin’ time
What are you wearing right now: The skin of a lion I slew with my bare hands