Sarzonia
12-10-2005, 16:43
[OOC Notes: Continuing the NS tradition of fluid time, these events are set before Pacitalia's government issued its support of Sarzonia being mentioned on Mondoth's List of Responsible Nations. Also, this is a closed RP. Do not tag this thread. If anyone else is to get involved, I'll make a note of it.]
Charles Layton had been working as a janitor at the External Affairs office building since its dedication and at 64 years of age, he'd seen just about everything that could happen in that building. He had just finished mopping the first floor and was puttering around on the sixth floor, treating himself to a can of Imperium Cola after another hard day's night.
He started the sixth floor at 6:30 that night, working his way down to the ground floor, but the only working vending machine was on the sixth. All the others were unplugged and Layton just didn't feel like plugging them back in and waiting for them to reestablish their network connections, so he just took the elevator to the sixth floor. He figured he'd just relax for a bit and drive home and get a good night's sleep and start the next day on planting trees in his garden to appease his wife.
However, he noticed something unusual. It was 10 o'clock at night and the light in Deputy Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer Grant Haffner's office was still on. Haff was usually a workaholic anyway, endearing himself to all but the janitorial staff that had to wait until he left the office for them to go in and clean up. Admittedly, Haffner often took care of his own messes and his office wasn't very hard to clean, but until he left, none of the other janitors could close the building up and go home for the night.
Layton tapped gently on the door and heard Haffner give a halting, "come in." He opened the door and saw Haffner and Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer Mark Lorber poring over a series of communicades. Lorber had a cell phone pressed to his ear and Haffner was squinting at his flat screen monitor with the look of a man who needed a holiday and fast.
"Sorry to disturb you gentlemen, but I was wondering if you guys were almost done here," Layton said, giving his best kindly old man tone of voice in an effort to mask his impatience with the late sojurn in the office.
"Almost," Lorber said with a slight sigh, mixing equal parts optimism with wishful thinking.
"All right, I'll be out here until you're done."
Lorber nodded his head and Haffner gave a tired smile while Layton backed slowly out of the room, shutting the door behind him. Lorber then turned to his second in command and shook his head.
"Looks like we've got a diplomatic quagmire here," he said. "Relations with Euroslavia and Pacitalia are near the breaking point."
"Serves Ell right hiring that bitch as Augustinate," Haffner hissed. "And what's with that dumb slut in Euroslavia?"
"Which 'dumb slut'," Lorber asked with a twinge of irony. Seems both of them want to paint us as being more aggressive than they are."
"Mark, a tsetse fly is more aggressive than either of those two."
"That may be, but Nicole and Mike have gotten us into a pretty serious fix with both countries."
"I'll grant you Pacitalia," Haffner said. "They're facing down the barrel of a Praetonian Dilemma with two of their close allies at each other's throats and they're blanching at our being overly aggressive. If we were in the same spot, I bet we'd be doing the same things they are. They're probably too similar to us for our own good in that respect.
"However, Euroslavia is a different matter. Sarzo's made his case and brought up more evidence in one week of negotiating with Lady Destra and her minions than Woodward and Bernstein unearthed in months of Watergate investigating. But they still refuse to believe we're anything other than warmongers. Despite our continually bringing up evidence to the contrary. They've even painted us as being aggressors when we recalled our diplomatic corps from Euroslavia."
"I know all that," Lorber said. "Having said that, perhaps Euroslavia needs a more delicate touch."
"They need our foot lodged up their arse," Haffner said. "They turn their backs on Samotopia when they're attacked by their regional neighbours in Witzgall as if they're too chicken shit to do something to help one of their allies and they make us look more demonic than Lord Damien on a bender because we supported our Praetonian allies against those fucking scum. Add to that their efforts to force us to admit Azazia into the Union of World Powers and I'm ready to sever relations with Euroslavia."
"They've been loyal allies of ours for years," Lorber said finally. "They deserve another chance."
"They're about as 'loyal' as France," Haffner said. "With friends like them, who needs enemies?"
"All the same, Grant, I'm not ready yet to throw away a longstanding friendship with Euroslavia. Now what do we do about the Pacitalia situation?"
"As I recall, they still have a large contingent of SAFD in Sarzonia, ostensibly to protect Sarzo against the Restore Sarzonia Task Force. I don't know about you, but having 200,000 special operations forces from another country spooks the shit out of me."
"What are you saying?"
"In light of the current diplomatic tensions between our countries, we need to get those SAFD out of Sarzonia before we're willing to begin discussing restoring relations between our two countries. We should issue a statement demanding their removal and then if they still want to talk, we can open the channels."
Lorber drew his breath in, then exhaled slowly, stealing every possible second to frame his response. Finally, he nodded.
"Go ahead Grant, but if this gets us in more hot water, I don't know if I can get us out of it."
"We're not telling them to get their diplomatic corps out of Sarzonia," Haffner said. "Just their military assets."
"All right, but if this blows up in your face, don't come crying to me."
Haffner set about typing his statement, then hit send. At 11:16 p.m. Sarzonian Standard Time, he finally shut off his computer and left the office to go home.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v419/msarzo/GreatSeal.jpg
Official Statement, Incorporated Sarzonian Government
Office of External Affairs
In light of the recent diplomatic tensions between the Capitalist Republic of Pacitalia and the Incorporated States of Sarzonia, the Incorporated Sarzonian Government hereby requests the Pacitalian government issue an immediate recall of all its SAFD assets currently in Sarzonia in the wake of the Second Civil War. We currently have our own MPs and Black Cobra units that we believe can ensure the safety of President Mike Sarzo from further RSTF attacks.
However, this move does not preclude the possibility of repairing fractious diplomatic relations between Sarzonia and Pacitalia. We are open to discussing a full restoration of diplomatic and economic relations to a point commesurate with prewar levels, but to ensure that such talks can begin, we must insist that the Pacitalian government ascede to our request.
With respect to the Freedom Forces of Euroslavia, we have not completely closed the door to further diplomatic ties with that country; however, if they wish to repair the damage done to Euroslav-Sarzonian relations, we believe they must make the first move after the repeated injuries they have inflicted upon the Sarzonian nation.
It would be immensely unfortunate if our two nations ended a friendship that has long been a shining beacon to the international community; however, our government must be prepared for any possibility in a world that bristles with hostility and tension.
Grant Haffner
Deputy Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer
Incorporated States of Sarzonia
Charles Layton had been working as a janitor at the External Affairs office building since its dedication and at 64 years of age, he'd seen just about everything that could happen in that building. He had just finished mopping the first floor and was puttering around on the sixth floor, treating himself to a can of Imperium Cola after another hard day's night.
He started the sixth floor at 6:30 that night, working his way down to the ground floor, but the only working vending machine was on the sixth. All the others were unplugged and Layton just didn't feel like plugging them back in and waiting for them to reestablish their network connections, so he just took the elevator to the sixth floor. He figured he'd just relax for a bit and drive home and get a good night's sleep and start the next day on planting trees in his garden to appease his wife.
However, he noticed something unusual. It was 10 o'clock at night and the light in Deputy Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer Grant Haffner's office was still on. Haff was usually a workaholic anyway, endearing himself to all but the janitorial staff that had to wait until he left the office for them to go in and clean up. Admittedly, Haffner often took care of his own messes and his office wasn't very hard to clean, but until he left, none of the other janitors could close the building up and go home for the night.
Layton tapped gently on the door and heard Haffner give a halting, "come in." He opened the door and saw Haffner and Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer Mark Lorber poring over a series of communicades. Lorber had a cell phone pressed to his ear and Haffner was squinting at his flat screen monitor with the look of a man who needed a holiday and fast.
"Sorry to disturb you gentlemen, but I was wondering if you guys were almost done here," Layton said, giving his best kindly old man tone of voice in an effort to mask his impatience with the late sojurn in the office.
"Almost," Lorber said with a slight sigh, mixing equal parts optimism with wishful thinking.
"All right, I'll be out here until you're done."
Lorber nodded his head and Haffner gave a tired smile while Layton backed slowly out of the room, shutting the door behind him. Lorber then turned to his second in command and shook his head.
"Looks like we've got a diplomatic quagmire here," he said. "Relations with Euroslavia and Pacitalia are near the breaking point."
"Serves Ell right hiring that bitch as Augustinate," Haffner hissed. "And what's with that dumb slut in Euroslavia?"
"Which 'dumb slut'," Lorber asked with a twinge of irony. Seems both of them want to paint us as being more aggressive than they are."
"Mark, a tsetse fly is more aggressive than either of those two."
"That may be, but Nicole and Mike have gotten us into a pretty serious fix with both countries."
"I'll grant you Pacitalia," Haffner said. "They're facing down the barrel of a Praetonian Dilemma with two of their close allies at each other's throats and they're blanching at our being overly aggressive. If we were in the same spot, I bet we'd be doing the same things they are. They're probably too similar to us for our own good in that respect.
"However, Euroslavia is a different matter. Sarzo's made his case and brought up more evidence in one week of negotiating with Lady Destra and her minions than Woodward and Bernstein unearthed in months of Watergate investigating. But they still refuse to believe we're anything other than warmongers. Despite our continually bringing up evidence to the contrary. They've even painted us as being aggressors when we recalled our diplomatic corps from Euroslavia."
"I know all that," Lorber said. "Having said that, perhaps Euroslavia needs a more delicate touch."
"They need our foot lodged up their arse," Haffner said. "They turn their backs on Samotopia when they're attacked by their regional neighbours in Witzgall as if they're too chicken shit to do something to help one of their allies and they make us look more demonic than Lord Damien on a bender because we supported our Praetonian allies against those fucking scum. Add to that their efforts to force us to admit Azazia into the Union of World Powers and I'm ready to sever relations with Euroslavia."
"They've been loyal allies of ours for years," Lorber said finally. "They deserve another chance."
"They're about as 'loyal' as France," Haffner said. "With friends like them, who needs enemies?"
"All the same, Grant, I'm not ready yet to throw away a longstanding friendship with Euroslavia. Now what do we do about the Pacitalia situation?"
"As I recall, they still have a large contingent of SAFD in Sarzonia, ostensibly to protect Sarzo against the Restore Sarzonia Task Force. I don't know about you, but having 200,000 special operations forces from another country spooks the shit out of me."
"What are you saying?"
"In light of the current diplomatic tensions between our countries, we need to get those SAFD out of Sarzonia before we're willing to begin discussing restoring relations between our two countries. We should issue a statement demanding their removal and then if they still want to talk, we can open the channels."
Lorber drew his breath in, then exhaled slowly, stealing every possible second to frame his response. Finally, he nodded.
"Go ahead Grant, but if this gets us in more hot water, I don't know if I can get us out of it."
"We're not telling them to get their diplomatic corps out of Sarzonia," Haffner said. "Just their military assets."
"All right, but if this blows up in your face, don't come crying to me."
Haffner set about typing his statement, then hit send. At 11:16 p.m. Sarzonian Standard Time, he finally shut off his computer and left the office to go home.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v419/msarzo/GreatSeal.jpg
Official Statement, Incorporated Sarzonian Government
Office of External Affairs
In light of the recent diplomatic tensions between the Capitalist Republic of Pacitalia and the Incorporated States of Sarzonia, the Incorporated Sarzonian Government hereby requests the Pacitalian government issue an immediate recall of all its SAFD assets currently in Sarzonia in the wake of the Second Civil War. We currently have our own MPs and Black Cobra units that we believe can ensure the safety of President Mike Sarzo from further RSTF attacks.
However, this move does not preclude the possibility of repairing fractious diplomatic relations between Sarzonia and Pacitalia. We are open to discussing a full restoration of diplomatic and economic relations to a point commesurate with prewar levels, but to ensure that such talks can begin, we must insist that the Pacitalian government ascede to our request.
With respect to the Freedom Forces of Euroslavia, we have not completely closed the door to further diplomatic ties with that country; however, if they wish to repair the damage done to Euroslav-Sarzonian relations, we believe they must make the first move after the repeated injuries they have inflicted upon the Sarzonian nation.
It would be immensely unfortunate if our two nations ended a friendship that has long been a shining beacon to the international community; however, our government must be prepared for any possibility in a world that bristles with hostility and tension.
Grant Haffner
Deputy Senior Vice President and External Affairs Officer
Incorporated States of Sarzonia