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President of Nodestan: General Huw Dares

After three years of bitter combat, the civil war that once raged between the vehemontly opposed citizens of Noddestan is finally at an end.
At midnight last night, new self-proclaimed president, General Huw Dares of the Noddestan national guard held a press conference to officially declare the end to hostilities.
Fighting broke out in July of 2002 when thousands of rebels, supported by the national guard, rose up against the government's new health bill which would have afforded the least fortunate of the populous free dental treatment but at the expense of the nation's struggling tattoo parlour industry.
The Noddestan government came under scrutiny by interested parties in September 2002 when a peaceful protest by a neutral faction was apparently mistaken for a hostile invasion of the government palace and was dispersed with a great deal of blood-shed.
It is thought that close to five hundred thousand men, on both sides of the conflict, were killed during some of the most bitterly fought battles ever seen on such a small island.
Members of the deposed government, including esteemed ex-president Gregory Chamberlain, famous for his ground-breaking speech on public decency and morality will be put to their deaths on monday, weather permitting.

President's Address
as given to the world's press at 0000hrs, August 31st 2005.

A new era begins today in my country. An era where bloodshed is behind us, where we can move on with progress and become a great civilisation in the eyes of the world at large. We seek nought but peace with our neighbours, whom we see as comrades in arms.
At dawn on monday we shall see the final deaths of this civil war which has brought us great trouble these last three years and yet, at its end, we can appreciate how justified the struggle was. Indeed, we shall not be so crass as to celebrate our victory in a loud and unsociable manner but instead move on with our lives and the life of our great city-state.
I ask those who would oppose this new administration to voice their concerns so that they may be addressed. Those that would support us, I ask for your acknowlegement. Those countries currently harbouring refugees and seekers of asylum I thank and ask now that you return our citizens to within our borders.
My promise to the world is that Noddestan will rise again and become the powerful pillar of strength and honour that once it was, before the installation of the last puppet administration with its ill-conceived values of kindness and compassion. That was a cancer that has now been cut out. From now on Noddestan will be ruled as Noddestan should be ruled.

Long may Noddestan prosper.


General Huw Dares.
President of Noddestan.