NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: To differentiate between a discussion of real life dumb laws that belongs on General and a discussion of your RP country, what are some of the dumb laws that exist in your NationState? Is a ten year old boy prohibited from wearing white between 10 p.m. and 6 a.m. unless it's a school night? Are sleeveless shirts prohibited in state parks (which is an actual law in Baltimore County in my home state, Maryland)? Is it against the law to take a lion to the movies (again, Baltimore County)? Are citizens prohibited from stepping out of a plane in flight (Maine)? Is it illegal to tickle women (Virginia)?

Have fun with it, and remember, if it's a law that is so absurd it's never enforced, so much the better!

SARZONIA

In Woodstock, it is against the law for a male to go shirtless when the daytime temperature is below 15 degrees Celcius. Also in Woodstock, profanity is prohibited between the hours of 9 a.m. and 7 p.m. on weekdays, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Saturdays and all day Sunday.

In Bausch, it is against the law to have a lobster for a pet.

In Portland, naval uniforms may only be worn by members of the Incorporated Sarzonian Navy. Also in Portland, the sale or distribution of fireworks may only occur if the purchaser sings the Sarzonian national anthem a cappella.

Nationwide, it is against the law for a foreign military power to have a base on Sarzonian territory (note, this is selectively enforced; if Praetonia or Isselmere-Nieland were to ask for a military base, Parliament would ignore the law, but if El Caudillo asked, Sarzonian foreign affairs officials are required to cite the law when refusing).

It is a violation of national ordinances for citizens to refer to American football as "football." Media outlets are required to refer to the sport of American football as "Gridiron football, formerly known as American football." (Note, Sarzonians call the sport "gridball," to differentiate it from football, aka "soccer." If someone called American football "football," people would be confused. If someone realised you meant gridball, you'd be laughed at.)

Dumb Laws in Jenrak:

1) It is illegal to touch lava in Scion.

2) It is illegal to have dogs talk between 4:00am - 12:00pm in Haasdra.

3) Tsellian is allowed to speak in Naharahk, but is illegal to write it down during holidays.

4) Detonation of a nuclear weapon in Asma, Scion, carries a $350 fine.

5) Destruction of a sacred relic results in an execution of the culprit and all their relatives.

It is illegal in the DCE to hug any metal pole, be it flag or light, when the temperature is below 0 degrees celsius. I don't want to get into to serious detail with this law, but it is rather funny.

Dark Jedi are forbidden, yet the Malkir use Dark Jedi powers.

Dumb laws of Central-Easern NJ

It is illegal in Monmouth City to wash a donkey in a public square from 5AM to 9PM Sundays

Attempted suicide is punishible by death in Hudson City

It is illegal to use profanity on a golf course in Monmouth City, Huddyville, and Neo-Leonardo, unless given permission to do so by a judge

In Neo-Leonardo robbing a bank is punishible by having your name forcibly changed to Rob Banks, even if you are a woman

1. There is a five-hundred year prision sentence for chewing gum in public, after one warning to stop.
2. Smoking anywhere is punished by a six-hundred year prision sentence.
3. Chewing loudly results in a one week "correction labor camp" sentence.
4. It is illegal to speak or write in French, except for government officals.

It is required by law in Lame Bums to own at least two firearms and have one on your person; however, it must be shown in the open. The only possible result is everyone walking down the street carrying M-16s.

Laws in Al Ahmera:

1) Every Male and Female must have sexual intercourse at least twice a day, (if they have no partner a Prostitute will be provided);
Failure to adhere to law: Sex Offense Fine $10,000.

2) You may say what you want about others races, but be warned: they can slap you around to the point of unconsiousness if you do.

3)All Sexually atractive women (these are judgeed by me) between the ages of 18 & 28 must wear whatever the emperor tells them too.
Failure to adhere to law: $10,000.50

4) Murder is legal. (If you've got a good enough excuse!)

1) It's illegal to grow plants
2) Sports are illegal
3) You can't walk on the opposite side of the street on sunday.
4) Teaching is illegal
5) Scientists are illegal (yet, Huntaer conducts scientific experiments)
6) Talking loudly every other day of the week is illegal.
7) Having fun is illegal

It is illegal in the Tokera
1) to burn fire hydrants on mondays
2) to eat pencils
3) to burn flags, but you must burn flags if they tough the ground
4) name your penis bob
5) have sex with trees
6) set your self on fire on tusedays
7) shoot yourself in the head, and the sentence for trying is death by firing squad

these are not actual laws but are funny

It's illegal to crucify yourself on Sundays, or indeed, do anything at all.

It is illegal to shoot anyone shorter than 5 feet in the head with a crossbow if said short person is on an elevated position of higher than 2 feet. You will be fined 500 Strakirs in doing so.

Making any word play jokes on the words "Fork" and "Puck" will result in unceremonial execution and a 1000 Strakir fine afterwards.

Suicide will result in execution. This is null if you convince someone else to commit suicide or kill you instead.

Drugs are illegal if smoked between the times of 12:46 AM and 12:49 AM, in a school building, and if there is a full moon.

It is, in the entire Empire, illegal to carry any weapon used for stabbing unless ordered by a military officer. This law has been traced back to the years 1280 - 1314, during this period the political climate was such that any person involved in politics (or related to someone involved) risked getting stabbed in broad daylight. The Senate then came up with this law to protect the politicians and their relatives, and also created a special police force to enforce the law. Unfortunately the Army was also subject to this law and thus they lost the Battle of Careena in 1297, since they had to fight without weapons.

It's is illegal in the Pure Socliast Holy Empire of Shazbotdom to have sex between the hours of 8am and 7pm.

The act of sexual intercourse carries a death penalty when combined wit hte action of consuming cheese, as the two combined acts create confusion.

"I was having sex last night, and I ate cheese."

Oh my, there are so many from which to choose...

The Union
It is expressly forbidden to wear, wave, fly or otherwise demonstrate with or promote the flag of the four regions of the United Kingdom on Union Day, excepting such government offices and other edifices pertaining to the former four realms. Failure to comply results in exile. (Est. 14 June 1687, last enforced 29 December 1864)

No person may clothe a domesticated animal without its express permission, unless the temperature falls below positive eight-degrees Celsius. Failure to comply results in the offender donning an animal costume for one full day with at least eight hours exposure to the general public. Alternatively, the person will be fined a minimum of 5,000 lethses or one week's wages, whichever is greater. (Est. 3 April 1982)

Anguist
No person above the age of majority may wear short trousers or similar clothing except for professional purposes (i.e. sport), recreational purposes at appropriate (e.g. polar bear swim), or similar in autumn or winter. Transit to an event or location where such garb is permitted must be proven by the supposed offender. The offender will be obliged to walk one mile naked, with the exception of plimsouls or similar ankle height footwear, through town. (Est. 16 August 1934, last enforced 30 September 2004)

Others to follow...

It's is illegal in the Pure Socliast Holy Empire of Shazbotdom to have sex between the hours of 8am and 7pm.

Oh my!

it is illegal to
1) spell the presidents name wrong, result is $5,000,000,000,000,000
2) to shoot a worm with a tank
3) to put out a fire with milk
4) to say hello on monday
5) to have more than $1 million dollars, fine $1,000,001

1) All food items bearing the names of any other foreign nation is disallowed on military premises; food with words borrowed from foreign languages must be addressed in its Omzian equivalent (that is, direct literal translation);

2) The act of climbing back onto a platform after jumping off (intentionally or accidentally) onto rail tracks in the Osaria Government City Subway System is forbidden - even if a train is approaching. Venturing into 10 meters from either end of the platform into the tunnel is forbidden as well.

3) It's illegal for anyone to carry a radio any larger than a notebook in public in Osaria Government City, with the exception of having the radio tuned to the frequency of the Omzian National Emergency Broadcasting Service, the same service used by public speakers.

4) Those carrying radios, digital music players, or any other entertainment device emitting man-made sound as a form of entertainment are not allowed to stay near the statue of the Omzian leader, Oma Zee, within 10 meters of distance.

5) The use of spent brass casings from used ammunition as a result of the firing of a firearm to create music as a mean of entertainment is forbidden.

6) Wearing a shirt depicting characters from a children's show is forbidden in secondary education institutions.

7) Wearing boots is disallowed on National Liberation Day.

8) One is not allowed to use a pencil that is more than 10cm long in government elections; voters are required to donate an unsharpened pencil to the authorities managing the voting site.

9) It's illegal to barter with paper.

10) Silver or gold-made objects in the shape of a diamond cannot be attached to one's clothes in public.

-snip-

OOC:
Hey. I tried to view your web site and my virus scanner popped up and said that it stopped a trojan from entering my PC. You might want to check that out.

-~-
It is ILLEGAL, punishable by having a nailclipper (an open one) jammed up ones anus, to say the letters Q and X one after another, in any order.
Christmas is an exception.
-~-
It is ILLEGAL, punishable by fine of FHP 92536.12 to say that Sephiroth r00lz j00, out loud.
Christmas is an exception.
-~-
It is ILLEGAL to commit any crime on the date of Christmas, [officially 25th December] even if Christmas is an exception.
Christmas, and your birthday, are exceptions.

It is illegal in Vintovia for any member of a family that was Formerly Royal or from the Landed Gentry to:

-Wear Glasses

-Take an IQ test

-Mention money

-Learn History

These laws were enstated by post-Royal era (1926-35) dictator, Vol-Vot.

In East Lithuania:

It is illegal to have a sexual relationship with a porcupine.

It is illegal to have ice cream in your back pocket on sundays.

it is illegal to buy jelly beans. (except for the dictator)

It is illegal to rape a prostetute. Fine is the same as shoplifting.

It is illegal to hate any Star Wars charictors. (Jar Jar binks is an exception)

And...

It is illegal to tell "Your Mom" jokes on a friday. fine $300

It is illegal to hate any Star Wars characters. (Jar Jar Binks is an exception)At least you picked the right character to make an exception of. :p

It is illegal in Rodenka to be a card carrying member of the Communist Party. Penalty: up to 3 years in prison and a 10,000 Ruble fine.


In Tsaragrad, all citizens are required to bow towards the Tsar's palace at 12 noon. Failure to do so results in a day in the public stocks. (The Tsar's palace was burnt to the ground in 1932 during the Commuist revolution. This law is now moot.)

Werid Jaksonian Laws:

- It is illegal that if you are on fire to jump in water.

- It is illegal to have thoughts that are dissentful towards the regime from the hours of Noon to Midnight.

- It is illegal to blink werid at the Kaiser.

- It is illegal to play "European football" at any time, at any moment, regardless of circumstances. Failure to follow this laws results in prison sentence.

- It is illegal to say "Hello" to the Kaiser.

- It is illegal to say the word "Democracy".

- It is illegal to believe you are gay.

In Kjata Major, every religious leader/servant must perform three different acts a year. An act of brutality, an act of passion, and an peace. Such things are not really enforced, but when you see the local priest with an AK-47 going 'duck' hunting or having 'relations' with a woman (nun) this laws protects them from being sued.

Also it is illegal for women to wear white shirts without bras. (If breast size is bigger then A cup)

It is illegal to tell "Your Mom" jokes on a friday. fine $300

In Vintovia 'Your Mum' Jokes are illegal, full stop.

In fact there is a charity (NSPYMJ-National Society for the Prevention of 'Your Mum' Jokes) that supports the victims of 'Your Mum' Jokes and leads the campaign against the evil people who commit them.

OOC:
Hey. I tried to view your web site and my virus scanner popped up and said that it stopped a trojan from entering my PC. You might want to check that out.

I don't have a trojan on my site. I've checked it on other people's computers all the time. Are you sure?

In Cooke, it is against the law for schoolchildren to brag when they get the wrong answer if called upon to answer a question orally in class. Punishment is flogging by a wet noodle. In Rypien, it is against the law to walk around your dwelling naked without the expressed, written consent of all parties who live with you. Punishment falls under indecent exposure statutes.

In Nicksia, routine traffic stops are accompanied by a mandatory $150 Sarzonian fine. Also, anyone caught taking photographs of the Naval Museum without a city-approved permit will be arrested, the camera impounded, and the perpetrator fined $250 Sarzonian. The wearing of naval paraphernalia is expressly verboten. Penalties are the same as fraud convictions. (Note this is NOT enforced. Naval uniforms are the most popular casual wear attire for citizens of Nicksia, especially in secondary school or uni.)

In Wicomico, it is against the law for someone to own more than three pet chickens. At least two must bear eggs. It is illegal for someone to pet another person's dog or give treats to any animal without direct supervision by police officials.

In Portsmouth, all students who try to pass first year and go into second year must spell "Poughkeepsie" and identify the name.

It's is illegal in the Pure Socliast Holy Empire of Shazbotdom to have sex between the hours of 8am and 7pm.

No Afternoon Delight?

In National Commonwealth, you cannot have teeth if you wish to eat apples on sunset beach, nor may you have insurance that doesn't cover liposusction if you want to be there.

All individuals over 2 must have monthly botox injections or face exile. (we're getting this one repealed)

The selling of public property is perfectly legal in National Commonwealth, unless:

-It serves as a public park, beach, forest, playground, school, canal, or other natural habitat or space utilized by citizens
-It has been used by public officials to conduct the business of the government
-Naurcautics (of all sorts) were ever present there
-Is within 500 miles of a Red-Light District, in any direction
-It has plumbing in the ground
-Serves as public transportation or belongs to a government official
-Is more than an acre
-It is "for sale by owner" or the realestate agent lives in the same locatlity of the land in question....

It is illegal for the people of Bretar to log on to http://www.nationstates.net lest they learn the terrible truth.

in Vilvek, Swilatia it is illegal to have sex with a pencil.

In Seabright Heights, Central-Eastern NJ it is illegal to make use of a watermelon as a means of conveyance on a public road

In Sandy Bridge, Central Eastern NJ it is illegal to produce impressionist art through use of a firearm in any way

In Neo-Leonardo there is a $300/per year fine for not owning a tank.

it is illegal to
1)pee while standing on your head
2) pee in your ear
3) poop while in a plane
4) have sex with more than 10 monkeys
5) have alzheimers
7) shoot the president three times in the head
8) shoot yourself more than 50 times in the head
9) eat a apple upside down
10) eat a bananna while on a roller coaster
11) for women to have their period in the month of august
12) say the words I or Do durring a wedding
13)is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle
14) chop oneself into 1,945 pieces
15) own a flimingo
16) say the president has a bad hair cut
17) have a hair cut, but your hair must be above your ears for males.
18) to impersinate your cousin
19) to say your uncle is your cousin
20) to Put salt on a railraod track may be punishable by death
21) It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.
22) marry your mom
23) wearing a bra or shirt when you are a hot woman(judged by me)
24)It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his penis
25)It is illegal to pick seaweed up off of the beach
26) detonate a nuclear weapon in your backyard
27)You may not have more than two dildos in a house
28)have sex with a dog more than 5 times
29)sleep on the yellow line in the middle or a highway, roads are a acception
30)No more than six girls may live in any house.
31)Women may not wear pants
32) Alligators may not be licked in the mouth
33) No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour
34) to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool
35)Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine
36)You may not hunt moths under a street light
37)Cats may not run loose without having been fit with a taillight
38)to cross a street while walking on your hands
39) to educate dogs
40) to get married to a public building,road, bridge, or dam.
41)to molest a deer
42) to allow gorilla in the back seat of a tank.
43) to glue two or more people together for more than one hour, or on wendsday
44) to fish from a airplane while in flight, unless using a elephant as bait
45) to say some thing is illegal, you must say unlawful " no.. no..wait.. dont take me, I didnt say illegal"

oh and one more. It is illegal to tow a stroller behind a car with more than 2 babies in it.

In the Tenarian city of Kalpass, it is illegal for any animal to engage in sexual intercourse within 30 meters of a public building. Wild animals must be put to death for the act and any owners that tame animals have must be fined at least 1,000 Kuronu for the act.

In the capital of Winter Peaks, it is illegal to consume alcohol or soda pop while within 50 meters of a bank or credit union.

OOC: Several of these are from my good ole hometown of NYC, I'll mark them with a star

*It is legal for women and men to wander the streets topless unless it is for a business purpose, then it is a 500 Leafanistani New Ruble (LNR) fine

*It is illegal for someone to talk in elevators, everyone must face forward and watch the numbers, failure to do so is a 350 LNR fine

It is illegal to throw a dead moose from an airplane without a parachute

It is illegal to stab a space vehicle with rusty impliments

It is legal to have sex outdoors as long as one gets a permit (800 LNR) which is good for 3 months at the greatest

It is illegal to enter a building naked without permission of the owner(s) unless your place of employment is there

It is illegal to wear a military uniform if you are currently not enlisted unless you have a large CDF (Civilian Defense Forces) on your uniform or a large Hammer and Sickle

It is illegal to rape fruit

It is illegal in New Bronxhaven to drag a dead horse through Main Street between the hours of 6 AM to 7 PM on alternate Mondays and Tuesdays unless it is a state-sanctioned holiday

It is legal to own an armoured vehicle with a mounted weapon as long as one pays a 5000 LNR weaponized vehicle tax and buy a 300 LNR Class VIII weapons permit. As a result of this law it is suspected that up to .02% of the population now own an armoured vehicle with a mounted weapon of some sort, ranging from a Jeep with an MG to a full blown T-72 MBT.

It is legal to own guns as long as one obtains a permit (free), however silenced assualt weapons between calibre's 9.8mm-12mm are forbidden

It is illegal in Rheingua to have anything more powerful then a standard T-72,T-54 or lower models are acceptable.

All new citizens from an other country must be given an honorary Colt.45.

At least 1 artillery cannon must be placed so it is aiming at a prison in case of massive breakouts.

Every gun store must have millitary grade weapons in stock at all times,in case of a zombie infestaition.

every immigrant coming into the nation will recieve a pound of C-4 and a nuclear weapon.

no prision shal have bars less than 2 feet apart. There shal be a ratio of 1 to 100 of guards to prisioners and a ratio of 1 to 1 guns to prisoners.each prisoner in shal recieve one emergency shotgun incase of a fire.

no citizen may keep a elephant in their bathroom. no male citizen may have sex with more than 100 females in a public place at one time.

no citizen may marry any public property with a acception of a street or a dam.

no young child may stick any thing except his fingers in a leaking dam, dams are not for pleasure.

the only flavor for for yellow colored shaved ice is lemon

It is illegal to spam City Hall.

It is illegal to masterbate while looking at a picture of the Dictator. (Women are an exception)

no prision shal have bars less than 2 feet apart. There shal be a ratio of 1 to 100 of guards to prisioners and a ratio of 1 to 1 guns to prisoners.each prisoner in shal recieve one emergency shotgun incase of a fire.

no citizen may keep a elephant in their bathroom. no male citizen may have sex with more than 100 females in a public place at one time.

no citizen may marry any public property with a acception of a street or a dam.

no young child may stick any thing except his fingers in a leaking dam, dams are not for pleasure.

OOC: Curses, with my foreskin I can manage 100 females at one time. Oh well, I'll just get a public sex permit in Leafanistan. ;)

The penalty of death is only permissable in combat under severe conditions.

No candy may cost less than .05 LNR unless it is chocolate

It is illegal to sing the national anthem in jest

Gun stores must carry at least 10 Anti-Air and/or Anti-Tank weapon in case of invasion and the proper ammuntion to take out at least 30 of each vehicle

It is illegal to operate a helicoptor for the purposes of pornography

All sheep must be liscenced, and registered whenever you change address.

All sheep must be liscenced, and registered whenever you change address.

It is illegal to win a dancing contest with a sheep

Sheep are not to be listed as residents of a home during a census

Sheep are not allowed to hold government offices

It is illegal to duct tape 3 sheep together for the purposes of a fighting match

It is illegal to win a dancing contest with a sheep

Sheep are not to be listed as residents of a home during a census

Sheep are not allowed to hold government offices

It is illegal to duct tape 3 sheep together for the purposes of a fighting match

oh there goes my idea to overthrow your government and replace it with a sheep, and my idea to use 3 sheep duct taped together as a weapon when i was overthrowing your government, damn you sheep hatin mother *@#$%^&

Use of the phrase "equally as" is punishable by a $100 fine. This law is strictly enforced.

Use of the phrase "equally as" is punishable by a $100 fine. This law is strictly enforced.

It is illegal to use the phrase "for all intensive purposes" that is terrible it is "intents and purposes".

Any farmer neglecting to mark his sheep with a prominent red or blue mark must walk through the streets of the nearest town wearing only untreated woolen trousers.
(A relic from colonial days, this law also applies to any textile farmer who fails to make timely deliveries of his produce to its destination. It's not fun.)

Cats are completely outlawed. Any cats found are to be abused, verbally and physically, and then thrown into the sea. A prize is awarded weekly to those who throw cats the farthest in their community. Any cats which survive are towed out to sea in a large, floating net and sunk by naval gunfire.
(This law was passed in 2004. Nobody concerned seems to have an adequate explanation as to why.)

Any farmer neglecting to mark his sheep with a prominent red or blue mark must walk through the streets of the nearest town wearing only untreated woolen trousers.
(A relic from colonial days, this law also applies to any textile farmer who fails to make timely deliveries of his produce to its destination. It's not fun.)

Cats are completely outlawed. Any cats found are to be abused, verbally and physically, and then thrown into the sea. A prize is awarded weekly to those who throw cats the farthest in their community. Any cats which survive are towed out to sea in a large, floating net and sunk by naval gunfire.
(This law was passed in 2004. Nobody concerned seems to have an adequate explanation as to why.)

It is illegal to have a cat trained for the express purpose of using it as a weapon or to use it to operate a weapon

Cats are allowed to operate vehicles as long as they pass a driving test

In France your not allowed to park your spaceship in someone else's vineyard

Also in Sweden your not allowed to call your kids ugly

It is illeagal to petition for new laws, or changes to existing laws, on holidays.

Punishment to be determined by the respective member of the preeage or official concerned.

It is illegal to go to school with less than your underwear/boxers, shirt, and shorts/pants on.
It is illegal to blow spitwads at your mom and/or dad, whichever is in closer.
Cats cannot lawfully mate with dogs, birds, reptiles, or any other creature besides a feline, with the exception big cats, which will immediately devour the furball of cuddlyness.
It is unlawful to keep more than one RPG inside a house, unless you are a terrorist, in which case you will be shot without remorse, even if not proven a terrorist.
Michael Jackson is under no circumstance allowed to enter the country, unless inside a casket, after being pronounced dead by more than three experienced doctors.
Defying the laws of physics is punishable by up to 200 years in prison without parole, depending on the severity of physics defying. In the case that the perpertrator ceases to live in prison, the body will be set up in a sitting position, and will be forced to complete the sentence.
It is illegal for sheep, dogs, birds (with the exception of parrots), cats, worms, insects, fish, mammals, millipedes, centipedes, or other animals to talk, which would be bending reality, which is strongly prohibited.
Driking alcohol while under the age of 20 is punishable by an hour of no food or water, soda, or any beverage.

In the Velkyan Union, it is illegal to play the game Nationstates. Also, noobishness is punisable by destroying the perp's computer and hanging them by their toenails.

P.S. How do you sink a cat?

These are all real laws in my nation.

1) It is illegal to wear orange in sight of the emperor. Doing so will result in thirty days' imprisonment and a 5,000 mythril fine.
2) It is illegal to leash an alligator to a fire hydrant on weekdays during the daytime hours.
3) Spitting, coughing, sneezing, or vomiting in a movie theater during the preview will result in permanent expulsion from that theater, and a 500 mythril fine.
4) If two trains come face to face on the same track, one must stop and wait for the other to pass.
5) It is illegal to dress a toad in clothing unless it is a pink dress and the toad enjoys consuming broccoli.

*it is illegal to have sex with a cat more than 7 times a day
*cats may not wear pants
*all cats allowed to roam the streets must have a working red taillight securely attached to it.
*a cats eye cannot be cloned more than 10 times, violators eyes will be replaced with cat eyes
*Kingsville, Sakowa, there is a law against two cats having sex on the city's airport property
*cats may only be licked on tusedays
*You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour or his/her lawn
*it is illegal to make faces at a dog, a crime that could result in a prison sentence
*it is against the law to give a light cigar, drugs, or alcohol to a cat
*any man may legally have sex with any animal just as long as it is a female(can you believe this is a real one In Lebanon )
* the law says that anybody who detonates a nuclear device within the city limits is liable to a fine of $500.
*In Conorsville, Wisconsin, USA, it is illegal for a man to fire a gun while his wife is having an orgasm

P.S. How do you sink a cat?
well first you put it in water, then you feed it rocks untill it sinks, or tie a rope arround it and tie the other end to a dead monkey

In Iowa, USA, it is illegal for horses to eat fire hydrants. lol what the hell were they on.

Cynteria dumb laws -

Capital city of Hoba:
* It is illegal to make positive comments about other nation's government

Northeastern Province of Klesen:
* It is illegal to shave your cat unless it has fleas
* All dog owners must carry a hose and walk their dogs along a route with an abundant supply of outlets to plug the hose into to break up their K9's mating rituals.

Coastal Province of Florice:
* It is unethical to teach a cat how to swim, surf, or take part in other water sports.
* It is illegal to play Kid Rock music in rural areas between the hours of 9 pm and 11 am.

Northern coastal Province of Walla:
* It is ilegal to ski into the ocean during the winter

Southern Province of Boreadore:
* It is illegal to harass that pizza delivery man
* The governor may not be kicked in the crotch if governor is male.
* Exorcisms must be performed by an official member of the church or within church grounds.


out of character: ...yah.... Boreadore has a "special" kind of population.... there are seven other provinces, but they don't really have any stupid laws. At least not yet >.>

It is punishable by death to impersonate a member of the preeage outside the boundries of the kingdom.

It is illegal to be a furry unless you are an artist and only draws such characters.

It is illegal to drown schizophrenic cats, they must be turned over the regional governor.

It is illegal to use game controllers as a sexual aid

It is illegal to drive a car without a driver's seat

it is illegal to throw a cat into the water, punishment of this crime is 1,000 eyster-dollars and/or a year in jail.

it is illegal for all animals with the exception of cats to speak piglatten

In the Holy Republic of Caffineism:
Only twelve year old girls, not fourteen year old boys, are allowed to own and operate lemonade stands
Decaffinated coffee and other normally caffinated drinks are strictly illegal (the punishment is death for smuggling them in)
Impersonating a tree sloth for attention is punishable by 300 coffee bean fine except on Thursdays

to sink a cat simply put it in water, then you feed it rocks untill it sinks, or tie a rope arround it and tie the other end to a dead monkey

In the Holy Republic of Caffineism:
Only twelve year old girls, not fourteen year old boys, are allowed to own and operate lemonade stands
Decaffinated coffee and other normally caffinated drinks are strictly illegal (the punishment is death for smuggling them in)
Impersonating a tree sloth for attention is punishable by 300 coffee bean fine except on Thursdays
there goes my career

In the Armed Republic of Soviet Bloc, and any overseas territory adminstered or governed by the Armed Republic or its military, it is illegal for any member of the armed forces, whether it be active, District Guard, Municipal Guard, militia, or reserves, to wear a dress or make-up/wig at any time while off base during peace time and war. The law stems from the war with Belem when a group of ARSB infantrymen, in the shaky peace that had lasted between the two wars [this was after the first war, before the second], had dressed up as a group of exquisitely dress medieval women and harassed Belemese soldiers in the nation of Buechoria. The following is a summary of the events from a newspaper report on the subject:



"During the temporary peace between the two Belem wars, a daring group of infantrymen from the 31st Infantry Division, stationed near Vogelsang, Buechoria, came up with a plan to harass Belem soldiers patrolling their base's perimeter. In the dark of night, these seven men purchased costumes from a Vogelsang costume and party store and purchased four Buechorian-made mo-peds. Due the fact that they were on leave for the weekend, the soldiers and their gear, posing as Buechorian citizens, rented a room at a Buechorian hotel on the same island of which Belem has its base. The next morning, the soldiers enjoyed a well-cooked brunch as they prepared for their mission during the afternoon. At roughly 3:30 PM Buechorian time, the seven soldiers, mounted on their mo-peds and dressed as Medieval women with large, flowing wigs and extravagant dresses of all colors and sizes, roared towards the Belem base. After a short five minute trip the soldiers arrived and began harassing the Belem patrols around the base. One Buechorian, enjoying a walk in the nearby forest, recalled that "these women in flamboyant dress were just terrorizing the clue-less Belem guards." He was later quoted as saying, "I have never seen such a sight in my life, it brought me to my knees with tears in my eyes, I was laughing so hard." The encounter lasted a number of minutes while the cross-dressing soldiers were throwing bottles of Buechorian beer at the Belem soldiers, eventually hitting them with broom sticks while circling upon their mo-peds. Belem soldiers finally opened fire, after realizing what was happening, causing the Soviet Bloc soldiers to scatter."



One infantryman was wounded and it is believed, that this report and reports of several other hooliganistic acts by Soviet Bloc infantry resulted in the build up of Belemese infantry and equipment in anticipation of another attack which led to the pre-emptive strike by ARSB forces resulting in a renewed, and intensified war. The resulting war claimed thousands of lives but resulted in an astounding ARSB victory.

Shortly after the conflict, when reports were rampant about ARSB infantry harassing their counterparts, the Ministry of Defense in conjunction with Parliament and the Premier, at the time, abolished many of the acts [which besides wearing dresses included the abduction of foreign soldiers, getting 'drunk' on any foreign military property, the abduction and defacing of foreign infantry (in one event, ARSB infantry abducted Belemese infantry, injected them with anesthetics, dressed them as drag queens and left them in the Buechorian capital at a local whore-house), and the defacing of foreign military property during peace time] but has yet been able to actually catch any of the involved personnel [besides the first wounded man, but the laws were not in effect at the time]. The laws are usually not enforced by military officials, however, prostitutes and their customers have cited it as a reason to jail policemen or women who pose as prostitutes, as usually they are wearing dresses of some sort and are considered members of the Municipal Guard. This reason has never held up in court.

Any person, foreign or domestic, can be ticketed, jailed, or fined over 1000$ credits for the use of the words “God damn”. Also, it is unlawful to utter any other phrase taking the Lord’s name in vain. This applies to all provinces and colonies under the Transnapastani flag.

An uncircumcised citizen of Transnapastain can be fined up to350$ credits for “Failure to remove foreskin” This applies to naturalized citizen regardless of their religion or cultural beliefs.

Any teacher, principal or otherwise reasonable educator found to not hold classroom prayer at least 3 times during a regular school day is subject to loss of teaching license and a fine of 500$ credits

It is unlawful to attend any religious service held by a non state-licensed minister, pastor, priest, ECT, regardless of religion. No license shall be given to any minister, pastor, or priest unless they are a member of the Church of God’s Will, the nations official religion.

If you hit an animal with your car, and kill it, it is unlawful to take it with you without reporting the killing to local game officials, failure to do so will result in confiscation of the carcas and a 100 credit fine.

On College and Job Applications, as well as Testing, it is considered fraud, to write your race on it.

On College and Job Applications, as well as Testing, it is considered fraud, to write your race on it.
That's not a "dumb law"! :)

An uncircumcised citizen of Transnapastain can be fined up to350$ credits for “Failure to remove foreskin” This applies to naturalized citizen regardless of their religion or cultural beliefs.

OOC: You have no idea how great a foreskin is.

It is illegal to use hair care products unless one is trained to use a rifle (unknown reason)

It is illegal to stab people who were stabbed with dirty knives

In New Husitania, it is illegal to impersonate a capitalist. This law seems to have been put in place to protect citizenry from being offended, as an angry mob shouting 'Fry piggy, fry' so often offends.

It is illegal in the Militaristic Monarchy of Tomzilla to be a hippie in public. Punishment is varied. The people can do whatever they want to said hippie. ANYTHING.

Crazy Laws on the books:

It's against the law to:
1)Have Vodrais or any sexually transmitted disease. Punishible by death.

2)To be a member of any political orginization that promotes any form of socialism or welfare state. Punishible by being sent to a reeducation center.

3)Not to advocate the nuclear destruction of the "Left Coast" punishible by reeducation.

4) Apostatcy: Punishible by caning.

5) Not serving their National Millitary Service punishable by death.

6) Being Poor: Punishable by death or 200 years of slavery.

In the territories of the 501st Legion:

1. The President must keep a set of Gundam Seed DVDs in his/her office at all times. Failure to comply will result in impeachment.

2. All members of the 501st Legion Armed Forces must have at least one boxed set of Stargate SG-1 DVDs (doesn't matter which season) in their possession. Failure to comply will result in temporary reduction of rank until a boxed set of Stargate SG-1 DVDs can be procured by the offender.

3. All civilians must have a statue of Lacus Clyne in their backyards. Failure to comply will result in a $30000 USD fine.

4. It is illegal to have sexual intercourse with a statue of Lacus Clyne. Failure to comply will result in confiscation of the statue until a replacement statue can be procured.

5. All civilians must play StarCraft: Brood War for at least one hour every day. Failure to comply will result in confiscation of the offender's computer until a $2000 USD fine is paid.

6. It is illegal for civilians to own or operate firearms without owning an Xbox and a copy of Halo 2. Failure to comply will result in confiscation of the offender's firearm(s) until he/she can procure an Xbox and a copy of Halo 2.

7. It is illegal to watch Battlestar Galactica (both the original and the remake). Failure to comply will result in the offender being forced to stand in the middle of Tiananmen Square in a Cylon costume for 24 hours without doing anything.

8. It is illegal for males to masturbate to pictures of any character from Final Fantasy X or Final Fantasy X-2. Failure to comply will result in the offender being forced to dress in a Rikku costume and parade around the streets of Manila for 24 hours.

9. It is illegal for females to possess oversized mallets. Failure to comply will result in confiscation of the mallet and the offender getting hit in the head with her own mallet at least once but no more than twelve times.

There ae no stupid laws in Einhauser. The mandatory executions metted out to unimportant people at the age of 60 is to keep the disgusting disease of age from spreading to the other, unaugmented citizens, and the automatic death sentence for anything ranging from being gay to being crippled is to put those afflicted out of their misery. I repeat, there are no stupid laws in Einhauser.

It is illegal to be drunk in Otagia, for obvious reasons.

there probably are some, but you'd be executed for saying them.

Stupid Laws of Stellar Nations:

It is illegal to own any artillery peices.

It is illegal to own a firearm and not have any amunition for that firearm. Antiques are an exeption.

It is illegal to own a spacecraft that is painted with yellow, green, and red and black checkered stripes, and has the words 'Pirates Anonomyous' on it.

It is illegal to enter a shop that says 'No shoes, no shirt, no service' on it with no pants on. The penalty for breaking this law is a fine of 800,000 credits

Dumb Hamptonian Laws-

Hamptonshire City:
*It is illegal to carry a sandwich while walking on a sidewalk between the hours of 11am and 1pm.
*It is illegal for an officer of the Capital Police to salute an officer of the Royal Police. Violation of this ordinance will mandate a 40 kroner fine.
*It is illegal to fail to yield to a Royal Congressman while at a four-way stop, but only during the second Tuesday of a month.

Seaburg:
*It is illegal to slap a freshly caught fish with the back of your left hand.
*It is illegal to stare at the sun during a solar eclipse. (But it is fully legal to stare at the sun at any other time.)
*It is illegal to break the law. (Bureaucratic redundancy at its best!)

Actual law in Pennsylvania: When making contact with a horse-drawn carriage traveling the opposite direction on a road, an automobile must be stopped, disassembled, and hidden under a bush until the horse has passed.

It is illegal to learn any science other than Physics. exceptions are allowed for geology or chemistry if the student take geophysics ot physical chemistry within 2 years.

to use the phrase "but the same work got another student a better grade than me" or any similiar phrase sgall result in repreating the course and a 5000 quantums fine.

Learning Organic chemistry is a capitol offense.

Possesion of coffee results in 2 weeks in a rehabilitation center.

The phrase "last year's test was easier" is punishable by wires being clamped to your nipples and connected to a 50000 volt battery.

forcing anyone to attend a boring lecture that is well beyond their ability to understand is punishable by 3 days without food in the stocks.

beer shall be provided for any student taking a test at their request.

It is illegal to learn any science other than Physics. exceptions are allowed for geology or chemistry if the student take geophysics ot physical chemistry within 2 years.

to use the phrase "but the same work got another student a better grade than me" or any similiar phrase sgall result in repreating the course and a 5000 quantums fine.

Learning Organic chemistry is a capitol offense.

Possesion of coffee results in 2 weeks in a rehabilitation center.

The phrase "last year's test was easier" is punishable by wires being clamped to your nipples and connected to a 50000 volt battery.

forcing anyone to attend a boring lecture that is well beyond their ability to understand is punishable by 3 days without food in the stocks.

beer shall be provided for any student taking a test at their request.

That coffee thing...I'd be a lifer.

Weird Kjatan Laws

If anyone is found without possession of a gun they may be shot in the butt by a volley of rubber bullets.

Staring in the direction of Mecca on a Sunday is considered illegal and can be fined by $2000 and a beating.

All humanoid androids of the female variety must wear bras and pants minimum for public display. This also has been included to mannequins.

Dumb Laws, Round Two

1) It is illegal for handicapped individuals, who are able to walk down stairs or elevators without assistance, to not use specially designated escalators in certain lines of the Omzian Government City Subway, during the hours of 0800 to 2200; similarily, it is illegal for more than two other people to sit on the waiting bench when a handicapped individual is present;

2) It is illegal on city streets to stop and examine your glasses for damage if it falls, intentionally or accidentally, on the ground;

3) It is strictly forbidden to honk car horns within a proximity of ten meters or less from a pole where a Public Broadcasting Services Speaker is installed;

4) It is strictly forbidden to mimic the motion of any public surveillance cameras installed in major cities, while they move along a fixed axis with a 240 degrees maximum field of view continuously;

5) It is forbidden to lick a tie or for one's finger to hold onto it for a time period that is deemed 'unacceptable' while in public;

6) It is forbidden to quack as a duck in a children's show when senior citizens are present;

7) In the People's Militia, it is forbidden to dress in formal civilian clothes or the standard 'spot pattern' camouflage suit while in a restaurant - a militiaman must wear the all-green parade dress uniform, ironically to promote 'equality and freedom of expression enjoyed exclusively by the people of the Invincible Might of Socialism, in terms of words, actions, expressions, or garments';

8) For the red stars and brown eagles that are part of the national emblem required to be placed in every public installations (including government buildings, schools, etc.), it is illegal to have black spots 'more than 1/10 of the red star or more than 1/20 of the eagle respectively' on the emblem; similarily, the use red or brown paint to prevent such from happening (as a result of wear) is forbidden.

9) It is forbidden to bring dried foodstuffs within two meters of a fan or the component of an air conditioning unit in public;

10) It is strictly forbidden to use pencil in a combination with a red marker on an envelope.

It is illegal to build a sand castle in the rain (Avg. rainfall per year = 0.1")

You cannot park your car inside of a school under any circumstance.

It is illegal to use a household pet as a dustmop.

Wow, I have to say, these other laws have me beat. o_O ...

Oh well, I guess that the few weird laws in some of my other nations all end up being an anime fan's wet dream... But other than those though, I really don't know.

Attempted suicide is punishable by death...

Prostitution is illegal... if you're an alien.

There is no such thing as an illegal drug, only missing prescriptions...

All people, regardless of Sex, Age, Religion, Race, Skin Tone, Income, etc. can vote. If they can make it to the booths...

Rock music is illegal, Syncopated rhythms on an electric guitar, with heavy bass lines is not...

No one is allowed to eat the toll booth!

Near death experiences are considered a failure to die...

Ok, my BS tanks are officially dry...

(This is also quite illegal...)

It is illegal to criticis an Emporer alive or dead.

In Attica City cremation is illegal and carries a 50 year prison term.

It is illegal to paint your fence red on a national holiday.

Banks must display at least for foreign flags prominently from the of their buildings.

The flag of Crete may not be displayed in public.

A police officer may not interupt a couple engaged in sexual intercourse.

Within Attica City it is punishable by a D2000 ($7541.03USD) for a Preist to refuse to perform a homosexual marriage ceremony. An additional fine of D4500 is issued to the leader(s) of the denomination, if it is a Protestant Church.

-Lone Alliance Laws-

Teenagers that show execessive amount of 'angst' with no justifible reason will be forbidden to listen to any music for the next 5 years. All of their music
will be seized and destroyed. They will also be shown horrible images to provide a reason that they should be grateful.

Anyone who looks like Michel Jackson will be shot. Then ran over by a tank.

Everyone must own an AK-74 with 40 rounds of ammo.

CEOs are only allowed to be paid minimum wage.

Smokers who are caught will be forced to eat their cigar or Ciggeratte while lit.

Any man over caught stripping in public will be hung by his....
Any woman must report to the Council chamber to be whistled at by official government Whistlers.

It is illegal to allow anyone to kill a cat. The fine is to be thrown in a tiger pen for 3 minutes. Any non-natives will be thrown in covered in meat for 10 minutes.

People who kill others in the name of religion (Terrorists) will be tortured up until nearly the point of death, healed, and then will repeat the cycle.

The penalty for suicide in Devon Land is zombification and the death penalty, which is to be administered by no less than 8 satchel charges being placed around the aforementioned zombie and the satchels being detonated by a surly midget using molotov cocktails.

All dogs in Swilatia must wear socks.

1) Anyone who is member of Michael Jackson fan club will be regarded as a criminal
2) It is legal to stone criminals in public, but you first need permission from a Rabbi who resides in a Synagogue within 1 mile of the execution area
3) Possession of pornography is illegal unless you have permission from the Inquisition or Jeruselem Catholic Church to own pornography
4) Images of Queen Mariah in any state of undress is not regarded as pornography
5) Anyone caught promoting Scientology is non-human
6) The secretary of the Minister for Foreign Relations must be Catholic

In Darvainia:
You may not drink Kool-aid or any other red-colored drinks after doing marijuana, heroin, or any other drug as it may cause violent tendencies or the desire to drink blood in the disoriented user.

(this is all I have for now...)

1. Children younger than 16 may only be flogged with a whip having 12 tails as a maximum. Any higher amount of tails is constituded as child molesting.

2. Being against racial segregation is considered as an act of racism against Panoolian citizens.

3. Books may only be burned when a local government official gives his fiat. Local firedept. must be present in case the fire grows goes out of control.

Anyone who claims the Dixie Chicks did the original version of "Landslide" or anyone who says that anyone other than Stevie Nicks should sing that song is tied up, taken to the centre of town and subject to rotten tomatoes being thrown at them.

Anyone wearing the Doomingslandian flag or any Doomingslandian paraphernalia is subject to a $1,000 Sarzonian fine but the flag is not confiscated.

The wearing of any non-Hobbeebian Flag ( excluding territorial flags) Can be punishable death or life in prison or military service untill death.

Repeat offence: death on spot

It is illegal to have ice cream in you back pocket.
Crime punishable up to 10 Hobbeebian amulet fine

Same on repeat offence

A certain adorable woman (who won't be named here) must be informed that High Father has had ( and continues to do so ) a reoccuring dream that he guts her in front of friends every time he has said dream. This has resulted in 172 official proclamations sent to her house. High Father associates with her on a platonic basis and still cannot understand the dream.

OOC: This is based on my expiernces, I'd like to know why my subconcious hates her.

No person may advise High Father on any matter unless that person is a minister. This results in hundreds of ministers with overlapping powers with silly names.

To properly dispose of a Leafanistani Flag, you must first detach each seperate section (triangle wtih Hammer and Sickle and the two color bars), so it is no longer the flag. Then burn it and bury the ashes with the same honors you would give to a person.

It is illegal in New Bronxhaven to be a zombie and set off the fusion reactor shutdown safety protocol. This was enacted after a major infestation shut down most of the power to Leafanistan's coastal and capital cities.

Every family must own and operate at least 1 working firearm with at least 1 clip of ammunition with the exception of antique firearms or display firearms. Another Post-zombie law.

It is illegal to interrupt sex between minors, it is a learning experience, if you notice them doing it, politely leave and let them continue.

No government official may be impeached or removed from office simply due to sexual happenings unless said sexual happenings actually interefere with the official's job.

1. Athletic Admission into Colleges is prohibited with a fine of $100,000 for the student, and 250,000 for the college.

2. Racial Based Admission is College is prohibited with a fine of $100,000 for the student, and 250,000 for the college.

3. Any school found having a Zero Tolerence Policy is fined $250,000.

4. Burning a Serapindal Flag is a "public disturbance" and considered vandalim, punishable with a $250 fine.

5. Lifetime and Oxygen, as well as all similiar T.V. Channel, are banned.

6. Modern Feminism is banned.

7. Spitting on a Soldier when they come home is Banned.

8. Students at the country must excell at an EXTREME rate, or else. If they aren't understanding Trigonometry by Age 13 (The Government considers that VERY generous, since most learn it by Age 12.) or else, they go to a "special" "reeducation" school.

9. Animal Cruelty is forbidden with a moderate fine.

10. Successful Suicide is punishable with DEATH.

Dumb Laws In Athiyk Linath:

Hugging any form of technology during the daylight hours is illegal

Kicking your computer from 10 pm to 3 am is illegal

Attempting to feed a dragon hotsauce has a 500 aero fine

The Beckman River in Sierra is not allowed to rise above the roadway of the Beckman River bridge. Plans to arrest the river have all ended in failure.

(OOC: Based off an Arkansas law)

It is punishable by fish-slaping, should any citizen of Artitsa spell the countries name "Artista".

(The author that sent this publication to Sarzonia has been publically beaten to death with a fish.)

Here the dumbest law states that it is fully legal to marry an apple, provided the apple is not married to another apple, nor if the apple is named Mary.

Taerkasten's anti-clothing laws could be construed as 'stupid', I suppose. Though there is a rational explanation (well, if you can call religion 'rational' anyway).

In Jibea tis illegal to:
think
Were green
talk
argue
write political cartoons
not listen to the emperor
do anything to do with music
be a forbidden religion
read
write

1) Failure to attend, and subsequently complete the class II Firearms licensing is subject to a http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/jay3135/menuki.gif500 (menuki) fine and a lien placed against their future citizens tax.

[It should be noted that in the several hundred years of this laws existence only three people (that were eligible) have failed the extremely easy state mandated test.. regardless of their failure no lien or fine has ever been enforced to this day.]

2) Failure to complete the necessary employment terms (50 quarters or about 13 years of consecutive full time employment) by age 70 in which to fully fund their State sponsored EIA (Equity Insured Annuity) will mean its forfeiture to the state. (Also known as the: ‘All or nothing’ contingent)

[though much hated by those who end up having their retirement funds deemed forfeit, those that complete the terms are guaranteed full Health, and Long Term Care benefits (without proof of insurability I might add.), as well as a http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/jay3135/menuki.gif3000 (menuki) a month dividend paid for the rest of their natural life.]

3) Suicide by Proxy is legal to anyone over the age of 21, at which point if the method, and the proxy is registered with the state a week prior. The Proxy is under no threat of legal repercussion for the death of their victim, unless the victim asked for mercy before the execution was to be carried out. A Notary, one armed witness, and a medical doctor (though the doctor can also be the proxy, as the one to die often choose their family physician to carry out the procedure painlessly) are required to attend to verify its legality.

[surprisingly this has sprung up both a rather morbid business in corporate ‘professional’ Proxy’s and has through a legal loophole allowed for duels to the death to be carried out if both duelists register the other as the proxy.]

Further odd laws in the UKIN:

1) It is illegal for schoolgirls under the age of majority to wear school uniforms that do not reach the knee. This includes schoolgirls attending classes within naturalist colonies.

2) It is illegal for naturalists to wear clothes within their colonies. (See above.)

2) It is illegal to remove the faeces of a noble's animal from his or her property without his or her express permission. Failure to comply results in one day's labour in the noble's fields.

3) It is illegal for a noble to demand by law the service of any person. Failure to comply results in the noble performing one day's labour in his or her fields.

No humans can exist outside of the dasha region. Only Avikanians, or Avikan anthromorphic foxes, can live outside the dasha region. Any and all humans outside the dasha region will be geneticly altered into an Avikanian.

Any cook undercooking anything will be baked alive in a cake, which will then be burned after completion.

All Avikanian family must have 1 sword and 1 shield. No more. No less. Failure to do so will result in a 10,000 dollar credit fine and/or execution by being buried alive.

All Avikanian military personel must wear the designated armor while on duty.

In Aktumbre, the following uniform will be enforced:
A pink or purple dress. The skirt must touch the ground and the sleaves must be an appropriate length.
There must either be a high, turtle neck style collar or a hood.
gloves must be worn.
those wearing uniforms with high collars must wear a hooded cape.
all hoods must cover the head.
when loitering, hands must be inside the pockets.
Everyone in Aktumbre must wear the uniform. Those caught without the uniform will be issued an altered one that is impossible to take off. Those caught loitering with hands exposed will have their sleaves sewn onto the dress in a way to make sure their hands are always in the pockets.

In amozonia, the uniform is for men only.

the regional princess must wear the uniform. failure to do so will result in her being sealed in her family tomb for life.

Other forms of punishment include:
being walled up in the underground halls.
being sealed inside the concrete of buildings and highways.
being buried alive under a road.
being buried alive in a coffin full of rotting flesh.
being covered in concrete as a statue.

In Erasheim it is punishable by death to be a citizen of another nation. Of course, anyone can become a citizen of Erasheim by saying they are a citizen of Erasheim, which can be done up until the moment of beheading for being a non-citizen.

heretics are branded on their cheeks with a hot poker then burned alive (hanging may be substituted for burning if circumstances make that easier). Heresy is defined by specific church leaders, one of which is completely insane and the other is a psycopath. Only one of the leaders needs to declare the person a heretic, though the insane one can overturn the decision of the psycopath if both are present. All heresy is determined on a case by case basis.

The sword of the emperor may only be touched by the emperor during times of war. At all other times it must remain sheathed. Any touching of the sword, even just to dust it, is punishable by death.

All children born out of wedlock lose citizenship rights and must be raised by the church, becoming soldiers for the church. As long as the mother is married at the time of birth, the child is fine.

it is punishable by death to be a member of the nobility. (Exceptions for the Emperor, any member of the military or priesthood and those few lucky ones who are pardoned).

If a citizen in a city commits treason, the enitre city's population may be executed.

OOC: You have no idea how great a foreskin is.

No, you're right, I don't. But, that plays right into the wacko religious establishment that is my national government...so, of course, its not personal opinion :)

It is illegal to use the phrase "for all intensive purposes" that is terrible it is "intents and purposes".

Wow, that's really awful. Do you know people who actually do that?

it is illegal to feed monkeys to elephants unless you are standing on your head on a tuesday of the 6th month of the year of election durring a full moon and while under water singing the national anthem to a whale thats IQ is above 800 and is eating spagetti with a spoon and watching a shark eating its kid and the shark must be wearing a dress and a bra while balancing on one fin and cooking meatballs with a 3,000,000,000,000ft long spatula.

it is illegal to call a cat a overlyobeasefleefullfurballthatsitsonitsassallday which for short a lazy monkey

it is illegal to have sex with three women while underwater

it is illegal to eat a hot dog since they are evil, punishment for this is to be starved to death

it is illegal to be a witch, all supcted witches will be chained to a 5,000 lb weight and sunk at the deepest part of the ocean, if the person does not come up after 3 hours the person is forgiven and pardoned.

OOC: I was really bored

It is illegal for citizens to not eat live rabbits. Punishment is slowly being dipped in a strong acid.

It is illegal for citizens to dress up in unapproved costumes of video game characters. The punishment is forced labor in a clothing manufactoring facility/tailor shop wearing an approved costume. the list of approved costumes is:
Fox
Krystal
Wolf
Link
Zelda
Ridley
Kraid
Peach
Mario
Luigi
All punishment costumes will be chosen by the regional president/princess and the crinimal will be forced to walk through the streets in costume to and from work. They can then be buried alive in a coffin with a dead body for any reason. No reason counts as a reason.

It is illegal for anyone in the Drortian Omega 5 region to not wear the approved garbs. Anyone cought violating this law will be forced into appropriate clothing, which will be altered to make taking it off impossible.

Further odd Hamptonian Laws:

1) It is illegal to give whiskey to a horse to drink, but only on Sundays.

2) It is illegal to impersonate a government official but only if the impersonation is done in an "attempt to confuse widows and blacksmiths".

3) It is illegal to purchase dairy products from a dairy farmer.

4) It is illegal for males under the age of majority to wear dresses in public unless also wearing a wig and carrying a purse.

5) It is illegal to shoot an intruder in the back but calling to the intruder to get him/her to turn around and face the shooter is perfectly acceptable.

6) It is illegal to spit cherry pits at a pig unless asked to by the Governor of a neighboring Province.

Stupid laws of East Canada (collected from Hansard)

1. It is illegal to use it's in lieu of its. There is a $5,000 fine for this.

2. It is illegal to grope the Prime Minister's wife, no matter how attractive she may be.

3. It is illegal to use Internet English.

4. It is illegal for Blue's Clues, Barney, or any insipid children's television show (determined by the Board of Children's Television) to be shown on any East Canadian network.

5. The use of any invented word use tastic, riffic, etc, is banned. Use of such words will result in a pieing in the face.

6. Any biology teacher caught teaching high school freshmen biology without their consent will be immediately shot.

7. The Prime Minister must show an episode of Neon Genesis Evangelion to Parliament every four days, or face a vote of no confidence.

That's all I've got for now- more later.

It is illegal to steal Charlton Heston's socks.

It is illegal to have breath mints as pets.

It is illegal to launch flaming port-o-john's from a trebuchet.

It is illegal to eat mustard in the spring time without getting a permit.

It is illegal to worship buttered toast as a God.

It is illegal to harvest children.

It is illegal to drive a fire engine in reverse on the wrong side of the road on odd Wednesdays.

It is legal to own automatic weapons, but it is illegal to own muskets.

Cow tipping is illegal.

Women are not allowed to cut their hair while wearing red on holidays.

If a dog kills a cat, it must be put to death. If a marmoset kills a giraffe, it will be given an Imperial pardon.

Throwing hand grenades at paraplegic midgets is punishable by castration.

all tattoos must be invisible
all vodka products must be colored silver
it is illegal to get drunk if you have a weak bladder
you are only alowed to urinate 3 time when drunk

Throwing hand grenades at paraplegic midgets is punishable by castration. And rightly so... lol

Stupid Laws

It's Illegal to be racist in the Republic and in the BAC, punishment is public hanging.
It's Illegal to refuse to sell a weapon to chlid, punishment is to watch Mail Call for 4 hours.
It's Illegal for a racist to live in tralier park.
Communism is banned, unless the person is a leninist, marxist, or anything that is not Stalinist.

Wow, that's really awful. Do you know people who actually do that?

OOC: I threw a chair at someone who did that, yes I am a terribly unbalanced person, who has blundered his way into all his fortune.

It is illegal to question why High Father constantly switches his appearaance and will go from age 17 to age 65 and then suddenly appear to be a teenager. It is also illegal to question why many of his advisors and personal friends also appear this way. [As of this moment High Father is technically 200 years old and appears to be 25-30.]

It is illegal to butter one's genitals for sexual activity. Water-based lubricants are safer and do not carry the fire hazard that butter does.

Water-based lubricants and condoms must be available for all those above the age of 14 provided they appear with their sexual partner who must be between the ages of 14-17 or if they are older 18-25 and then 26+.

It is illegal to use post-it notes as a form of clothing.

It is illegal to throw a CD at a public official or musician as a form of protest against their beliefs, this becomes felony assualt. [Enacted when a CD almost cut rapper N.O.F.'s finger off at a concert, the CD narrowly missed his hand and embedded itself 4 mm into the concrete wall he was performing in front of]

It is illegal to remove a person's foreskin without consent of that person or their legal guardians if they are below the age of sexual consent.

Rubber gloves are not to be used as a sexual aid or as a contraceptive.

Every employer must provide 15 minutes of "funk" if at least 85% of employees request it.

While not government enforced laws, per say, the “popular culture” in Transnapastain has established their own customs and “laws” on society

For example

It tends to be, that anyone who claims that Limp Bizkit wrote, or originally did “Behind Blue Eyes” is drug out behind the nearest barn, or into the darkest alley, if an urban setting, and beaten within inches of their life, then forced to listen to The Who, rightfully, perform the song, until such time as they repent of their sins, or blasphemy, as it has come to be called.

The same goes for parsing the CD “St Anger” by Metallica as anything better than “eh, a couple songs weren’t too bad.” The popular culture doesn’t take to kindly to Lars clanging away on trashcans, and neither should you. This one may very well carry the death penalty.

Listening to the song “Katmandu” by Bob Seager more than once in a row is punishable by breaking the device used to commit the offense. The same law applies to Hoobastank’s “The Reason.”, and Three Doors Down, “Kryptonite”

While drinking, it is illegal to fail to sing the song “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey at least once. Also, the song “Piano Man.” should be attempted at least 1 time through the evening.

To disrespect the band Rush is to disrespect God himself. Do not do this. Minor deities include. OLDER Metallica, Megadeth, Iced Earth, Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Led Zeppelin, Rolling Stones, The Scorpions, Blue Oyster Cult, and REO Speedwagon.

It tends to be, that anyone who claims that Limp Bizkit wrote, or originally did “Behind Blue Eyes” is drug out behind the nearest barn, or into the darkest alley, if an urban setting, and beaten within inches of their life, then forced to listen to The Who, rightfully, perform the song, until such time as they repent of their sins, or blasphemy, as it has come to be called.Hear hear!

The same goes for parsing the CD “St Anger” by Metallica as anything better than “eh, a couple songs weren’t too bad.” The popular culture doesn’t take to kindly to Lars clanging away on trashcans, and neither should you. This one may very well carry the death penalty.Haven't heard the CD, so I can't say.

Listening to the song “Katmandu” by Bob Seager more than once in a row is punishable by breaking the device used to commit the offense. The same law applies to Hoobastank’s “The Reason.”, and Three Doors Down, “Kryptonite”Hey, don't mess with Bob Seger! And don't mess with “Kryptonite.” I'll grant you the Hoobastank song. I can't stand to listen to it more than once.

While drinking, it is illegal to fail to sing the song “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey at least once. Also, the song “Piano Man.” should be attempted at least 1 time through the evening.Are you a country or a karaoke bar? :p

To disrespect the band Rush is to disrespect God himself. Do not do this. Minor deities include. OLDER Metallica, Megadeth, Iced Earth, Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Led Zeppelin, Rolling Stones, The Scorpions, Blue Oyster Cult, and REO Speedwagon.I LOVE Led Zep and the Stones. I like REO and Blue Oyster Cult to a lesser extent.

More stupid rules and regulations of the 501st Legion:

1. The President must watch at least one episode of Gundam Seed every day. Failure to comply will result in impeachment.

2. All members of the Congress of the 501st Legion must watch all six episodes of FLCL in their entirety every day they are in session. Failure to comply will result in the offender(s) getting whacked in the head at least once but no more than six times with a left-handed bass guitar by the Speaker of the House.

3. All members of the 501st Legion Armed Forces must watch at least one episode of Stargate SG-1 every day. Failure to comply will result in a $200 USD fine for each episode missed (this fine is cumulative, of course).

4. All members of the 501st Legion Armed Forces must play Counter-Strike for at least one hour every day. Failure to comply will result in the offender(s) getting shot in both knees with an Arctic Warfare Magnum at point-blank range.

5. It is illegal for any male civilian to have sexual intercourse with the statue of Haruko Haruhara that stands in Tiananmen Square. Failure to comply will result in the offender getting hit in the testicles once with a left-handed bass guitar by a female police officer cosplaying as Haruko.

6. Cloning Rei Ayanami is legal. Cloning Asuka Langley Soryu, on the other hand, is illegal; failure to comply will result in Shinji Ikari masturbating on the offender(s).

7. It is illegal for minors to go around on rollerskates and hit people with baseball bats. Failure to comply will result in the offender(s) being forced to watch all 13 episodes of Paranoia Agent in their entirety.

8. It is illegal to say the words "Pokémon" and "Digimon" in the same sentence. This is not an official government-enforced law, however, but an idiosyncracy of 501st Legion otaku culture; failure to comply will result in the offender(s) being stripped naked and forced to parade around Beijing for at least one hour but no more than twelve hours (application of punishment is somewhat inconsistent, however).

Real "crimes" that I know of in Oklahoma.

It is illegal for the captian of a ship to shoot a whale from the deck of his ship. (Oklahoma is landlocked. I understand there is another state or two with the same ordinance. Also landlocked.)

It is illegal to transport a Playboy magazine across state lines, (even though Playboy is available through the US Postal Service. I've actually known this one to be enforced sometime in the last 15 years. The perpetrator got time served)

Roosevelt, Oklahoma.
I don't remember the specifics.
It is required that motorists send a man on horseback a certain distance ahead of them to warn everyone in town that someone driving a car is coming. VERY ignored.

Here's a stupid one. I don't remember the full details. Fortunately it was overturned.
In the US it WAS illegal to transport a firearm within a certain distance of a public school. Something like 200 feet. It is quite common for public schools to be closer than that to major roads and highways. Congress was duly informed that "regulation of interstate commerce" did NOT extend to this.

This is a thread about your NationStates country, the one you roleplay with, not your real country.

This is a thread about your NationStates country, the one you roleplay with, not your real country.

But...but....but truth is stranger than fiction!
:>

In Schultaria Prime it is illegal...

"... to have the government sponsor, certify, or publish any singular textual volume whose physical dimensions either meet or exceed thirty thousand pages of legal (type A) size or one hundred kilograms in total mass. Any and all works that reach these criteria shall be ordered, on the behest of the Central Scientific Collective and National Assembly, to be divided into smaller volumes at government expense." -USSSP National Law NASDC 2-227

'... to have any textual volume be bound by any metallic clasp, filament, or other unification method yet to be devised lest the bindings be encased in soft material and all pertinent rough edges smoothed. All books published on or before the ratification of this instrument shall be hereby exempt from this law, lest they are in the possession of any individual who is in the process of engaging in the Schultarian Codes of Dispute" -USSSP National Law NASDC 3-21

-Both of these laws were passed in an attempt to try and subdue the impact of a little used code of dispute known in Schultaria Prime as the Tah'kiea'leiah (Tash - KAY - LEE - ah), the final step in the Schultarian codes of debate, and the one most feared by every Schultarian academic. In over 700 years only 15 debates in Schultaria Prime have escalated to this point; 13 of them occurring in the first 400 years of Schultaria's Existence and the last one conducted well over a century ago. Unlike any of the other Schultarian debate formats, Tah'kiea'leiah is the only one that permits the use of physical force.

This debate format consists of only the leaders of each disputing party spewing tirades at each other until both leaders become frustrated and violently angry. Utilizing whatever is on their person, each leader continues to yell their case to anyone who will listen while attempting to beat their opponent into accepting their view. In 8 of 15 known instances where such an event has been documented, the debate ended without loss of life (although the injuries sustained left most of the non-victorious leaders paralyzed). For many individuals who participated, the only thing they carried into this event was usually a very large, extremely heavy, tome or volume that could serve as a handy club or battering ram. When the democratic revolution in Schultaria Prime subsided, significant efforts were made to lessen and eventually remove this less than courteous method of settling disputes, but only with limited success.

Spooty doesn't have any laws, but the Holy Church of Floyd Spooty sect has a few customs.

1. Thou Shalt not disrespect any of the members of Pink Floyd or Pink Floyd itself, upon punishment of having to listen to the scissor sisters cover of "Comfortably Numb."

2. Thou Shalt not be welcomed into "The Machine" upon punishment of having your possesions stripped, and then sold off to the general public.

3. Thou Shalt not mention the Scissor Sisters, upon punishment of having every part of hair upon your body removed.

the scissor sisters cover of "Comfortably Numb."Is that the real dance music-like version I heard once at a bookstore? If so, it's just flat out *wrong* to make that song into something you'd dance to at a club.

They took Comfortably numb, a decent classy song about the anguish of former member Syd Barrett, then they added a Disco beat, then they sped up the Tempo, then they used voice modulaters to make their voices similar to that of the Bee Gee's, thus they created the Disco Edit Comfortably numb, any Prog Rock fan within hearing distance would go mad.

They took Comfortably numb, a decent classy song about the anguish of former member Syd Barrett, then they added a Disco beat, then they sped up the Tempo, then they used voice modulaters to make their voices similar to that of the Bee Gee's, thus they created the Disco Edit Comfortably numb, any Prog Rock fan within hearing distance would go mad.Putrid.

That sounds like the version I heard at that bookstore. I'll stick with the orginal, thankyouverymuch.[/Pink Floyd-related hijack]

It is illegal to show public displays of affection between Monday and Thursday in the Bonstocknian capital of Port Yuko. On Saturdays, Sundays, and Fridays, it's perfectly fine. Police officers, military personnel, and government officials are exempt.

It is also illegal to commit suicide. Those who attempt to do so are quickly sent into the army, and given assault rifles without ammunition. Then they're told to charge at enemy machine gun positions with nothing but the bayonets on their rifles.

It is also illegal in all of Bonstock to sing any Britney Spears song on weekdays. Those caught will be sent to reeducation camps until they learn to spit on Britney Spears.

OOC There's a town in France where it's illegal to die

IC In the Dictatorship of McClella the rules are simple, do what your government tells you. Any infraction of the laws results in death. Voting is cumpulsory, smoking is prohibited, drinking alcoholic drinks is prohibited, anything that goes against the Bible is prohibited. Any false religions are prohibited, including but limited to; Islam, Bhuddism, Hinduism, Voodism, Catholicism. Also, the only music permissable is any good, Christianly music, hymnals and the sort, Bruce Springsteen and classical music. Anybody who votes Democratically or leans to the left will be skinned alive and placed into a vat of salt water. Cremation is illegal. Tatoos are illegal. Body piercings are illegal. Anyone who does any form of body modification will have said modification removed by hand. No room shall be messy in the Dictatorship. Anyone who's dog poops and they don't pick it up will be shot on sight. Suicide is never to be mentioned or known about by the peoples of McClella so that they will never know about it. I lost a teacher in 11th grade to suicide. No more of that, now. (Not just an IC thing, I really did, quite a sad time :( ) That's all.

Stupid Laws of Taldaan

In 1966, in the televised debates leading up to the general election, the presidential candidate James Greene was jailed for one year after throwing a custard pie at the soon-to-be President Sofia Grant. Despite his punishment, the throwing of custard pies in general election debates became such a popular tradition that it is now required by law that candidates bring five custard pies, made according to regulated dimensions, to each debate. This law was apparently passed to reduce voter apathy.

No one genre of music can be played on any radio station for more than twenty percent of airtime, and roughly equal coverage must be provided in all genres that a station caters for. Genres must be ratified by government commitee. On modern music stations, this has had the effect of leaving rap and hip-hop stranded against thrash metal, speed metal, death metal, black metal, hardcore, stoner rock, doom metal, metalcore, grindcore, hair metal, and all other related genres.

No hat may have a brim protruding more than twenty centimetres from the main headpiece. The exception to this is the sombrero, in which the brim must protrude at least seventy centimetres.

Animals considered dangerous may be taken out of their enclosures for exercise, on condition that they are mounted with bells and flashing neon signs to alert the public.

Public sale of ice cream is banned (Toku only, following a series of attacks on random civilians in which ice cream was a factor)

It is illegal in Ald Rhun to be warm blooded, punishable by death. This is mainly to excuse the fact that Rhuns find humans (and elves, and orcs, and...) quite tasty.

Cruxgrad's Stupidest Laws

It is illegal to sneeze on a buffet containing fresh fruit of vegetable.
You may only sing the national anthem whilst standing on the floor (A week ago a man was shot to death for singing it ontop of his fridge)
It is illegal to stuff a fully grown gorilla into a freezer.
It is illegal to eat a banana in public between the hours of 3 am. and 6 am.
It is illegal to white socks with brown shoes and blue trousers.
It is illegal to wear anything but black socks with black trousers and black shoes.
It is illegal to reveal bodyhair in public without a permit.
It is illegal to read a book whilst upside down.
It is illegal to carry venomous animals inside your trousers without a permit.
It is illegal to wear a wig if you have more than 20% head hair.
It is illegal to walk backwards while wearing orange.

There are good reasons behind every one of those laws and if you ask about them you shall be given answers :p

-Phil.

whats with the Orange one?

It is illegal to wear red on fridays. The ounishment is usually feeding dolphins, but wearing red on firdays, IN JUNE is ounishable by 40 years in Hell. And of course, when it is raining, and Junem and friday it is a capital offense. Which is stupid really, becuase capital punishment is illegal in Aeazer. Those zany lawmakers! :mp5:

The law about walking backwards whilst wearing orange is due to the following;

Most people who wear an outfit comprised soley of orange clothes would be considered a twat, therefore people are likely to try and run them over. If you are walking backwards it makes avoiding a car difficult, whereas walking forward you can jump out of the way. Bad fashion is also a crime, hence the sock rules.

Most any crime against fashion is punishable by flogging.

-Phil.

and the Gorrila in a Freezer?

Though it remains on the statute books merely as an archaic remenant of times gone by and really doesn't mean much any more, the constantly changing governments of Noddestan consistantly ratify the law that states:

Thou art permitted, on the first day of kevinmas, to request of thy neighbour his virgin daughter, for the bedding and deflowering of.

But no-one can actually remember when kevinmas (an outdated religious festival, said to be the anniversery of the patron saint of Noddestan, St Kevin's death at the hands of a four-year-old girl) actually is, much less upon which date the first day of it falls.

Your chances of finding a virgin over the age of consent in Noddestan however are slim.

No law is a dumb law so long as it keeps order. Skateboarding is punishable by culling, as are 90% of all other crimes. The remainder involve organ harvesting and solient green.

In MassPwnage:

*Grocer's Apostrophes are punishable by death.

*It is illegal to interfere with anyone attempting to win a Darwin Award.

*It is illegal to win a Darwin Award.

*Stupidity can be punished by death.

*The consumption of camel meat between the times of 3:00:00 a.m and 3:00:01 a.m is prohibited

*Morbid obesity is punishiable by mandatory liposuction followed by exercise.

*It is illegal to have sex with Satan on Tuesdays.

*Bad liquor is illegal.

*Playing country music can be punished by death.

Jack Thompson can not step into our country. If he does, then he will be castrated.

Even more stupid rules and regulations of the 501st Legion:

1. It is illegal to disrespect the band Green Day, its songs, and/or its members. Failure to comply will result in the offender being sent into solitary confinement and forced to listen to "Jesus of Suburbia" once every thirty minutes for at least twenty-four but no more than seventy-two hours; upon release, the offender will be forced to wear eyeliner every day for no more than a week.

2. It is illegal to disrespect any rappers and/or hip-hop artists. Failure to comply will result in execution by drive-by shooting.

3. Billie Joe Armstrong, Mike Dirnt, and Tré Cool have diplomatic immunity. (Actually, in retrospect, this isn't really a stupid rule or regulation.)

Harry potter books are banned, nudists are arrested, People can't ride bikes, Greenday and Good Charlotte is illegal to listen to, if listened to the listener shall be beaten, people with G.P.As below 1.0 have thier freedom of speech revoked, and self defense in school is O.K


BEEF JERKY SHOULD BE EATEN ON A REGULAR BASIS, BECUASE IT IS THE BEST FOOD EVER!

It's illegal to use a condom in the month of October.

Over here, our top 5 stupidest laws are:

1. Firing at a person is punishable by a death sentance, while firing at a crowd larger that 10 can be punishable for up to 75 years.

2. Drinking between 1:07 A.M, and 1:08 A.M. on the third tuesday of each month is punishable by a fine of 1000 credits.

3. Children under 10 May not drink, unless it is between 1:07 A.M. and 1:08 on the third tuesday of each month.

4. Insulting someone and apologizing in the same five-minute span will remove the 20c fee for an insult.

5. People are fined 20c for insulting someone.

It is illegal in Sofia to bait a Mass Pwnage Man-Eating Stranger Fig with a llama without proper licensing permits. It is illegal for a prostitute to communicate a sexually transmitted disease. Penalty is usually death, but can vary with the disease. In Generia City it is unlawful to park a car on top of a diabetic unless one is celebrating the Festival of the Victory of Antonius the Magnificent over Alexias the Noteworthy or the diabetic is a prostitute that has been convicted of communicating a sexually transmitted disease. It is unlawful in 7 provinces to name one's child 'Gerald'. It is unlawful in the province of Alberia to poke fun at the archbishop of Alberia's funny little hat. It is illegal anywhere in the Empire to speak ill of Slash. The penalty for such an offense is death.

In Holy Paradise City, a law that is never enforced, but no one wants to bother to repeal, says that anyone who sniffs in public, then walks over a manhole, will be fined 200 gold coins.

In Darumba, anyone who makes love to an alligator is put in jail for 2 years, unless it was on the 5th of November, between 2:00 PM and 3:00 PM, was wearing a red tanktop and gray shorts before the act, and says "pumferdinkle" before hand, in which then he is fined only 250 gold coins.

Cow owners should take heed In Arkansas!!!!

Bessie may need her exercise but even cows deserve Sunday's off. It's unlawful to walk your cow after 1:00 on Sundays. :)

On the Isle of Asweb in Fluffywuffy, it is illegal to write HTML code from 5 a.m. to 12 p.m.

In Rexicum, it is illegal to have sex while wearing clothes. Punishable by public hanging and corpse defacing. However, if the clothes are ten different colors, the sentence is reduced to "only" 1 billion to the power of 1 billion years in prison.

Also in Rexicum, to call a teacher "mom," "dad," or any variation is punishable by what is known as the "Great Punishment." The criminals are stripped naked, branded publically with the words "criminal," and are no longer allowed to vote.

In Upper Botswavia, a law we all take seriously is that it is illegal for persons of the opposite sex to exchange undergarments in a crowded library during our biannual Festival of Flour. The penalty is that both parties are required to perform in community theatre productions of Hamlet (in whatever roles they are best suited), and the party with the lacier undergarments must also teach seniors water polo at the local Y.

We have some really SILLY laws as well. The one about stapling recalcitrant mothers-in-law to tie dyed goats comes to mind...

it is against the law for any one person to alone breath in sycranysim with a cats purring, although sycronized breathing to cows pooping is considered a sport and is enjoyed by all. PENALTY-one year straped to and old man or woman who is on a resporator.

It is wrong to strap ones self to any fast moving thing while atempting to catch and eat a roadrunner, unless you also intend on prancing around a table while eating the roadrunner. PENALTY-half a year in prison then imedeate excile to the acme testing corporatins on the moon.

it is considered unholy to praise anything containing the letters a or s unless the s is preceded by a u or an e. PENALTY- 100 children of unwed mothers are forced to live in ones pants for a year.

It is punnished by death to have more than 50 children living in your pants no mater how many times you have broken any law(unless you have murdered a suposed black singer that has been acused of molesting small children, if this is found to be true you will have emediate imunity from all laws except murdering any one considered smarter then you by at least the current leader of the nation, if he is the victum you shall be given full amnesty from this crime)

*Bump* because I don't think the punishment I would have mentioned passes muster as something I should write about, even for RP purposes.

In RB, it's illegal to call gastroenteritis "the flu." Only influenza may be called "the flu."

Spelling things the British way (i.e., "favourite" instead of "favorite") is also illegal, and doing so can result in a fine. (This law does not apply to tourists or British residents, however.)

I'm not sure if this counts, but in the Socialist Republic it is illegal for any commercial or industrial establishment to "take any action contrary to the public interest." Nobody is exactly sure what this means, even in the legislature, but the general consensus is that it's a convenient excuse to shut down businesses that get out of line or move them into the public sector.

More of a dumb punishment than a dumb law, but since Elephantum never lowers sentences or paroles criminals, if you recieve, say, a 600 year sentence as a combination of several murders, your corpse will not leave the prison until 600 years, to the day, of your entrance to the prison.

Laws? Czardas doesn't have laws!

From the Cottish Penal Law books

§ 75
(1) - Stupid parking whichtake up more than one parking space is punishable by a fine of £15,000.-
(2) - Repeated offense will result in execution and a £75,000.- fine.

§ 662
(1) - It is illegal to utter the word "nazi", and is punishable by death by gorilla.
(2) - This does not apply in approved teaching contexts or when intoxicated.


§ 782
(1) - It is illegal to make any acts which might serve to indicate that US President George Walker Bush Jr has any sorts of brain function, and is punishable by death by gorilla.
(2) - This does not apply in "stand-up" comedy or similar events.

The Holy Otaku Church of the Eternal Kawaii does not have "dumb" laws. Our legal code has been handed down by the Eternal Kawaii (may the Cute One be praised) Itself, and contemplated by sages and otaku for generations.

That said, We do have some laws that foreigners have told Us are odd:

- It is illegal to do the following in public: hold hands, kiss, make out, wear sexually suggestive clothing, swear, make rude gestures, or make insulting or demeaning comments to any person, place or thing.

- It is illegal to blaspheme the Eternal Kawaii (may the Cute One be praised), proselytize for any heathen faith, import heathen religious literature or publicly wear the religious symbols of any heathen faith.

- It is illegal for a couple to socialize (ie go out to dinner, or participate in public entertainments) as a couple without first announcing to their peers that they are an official couple. Also, such couples must officially announce a change of their status before the two can separate and form other couples.

- Arranged marriages between children are legal, provided the children are raised in separate homes and are given the opportunity to "divorce" one another if it doesn't work out when they reach the age of majority.

- It is illegal to eat an animal which has performed labor, such as drawing a plow. Dogs, cats, horses, dairy cattle, and other "service animals" are ritually unclean for consumption.

- It is illegal to fish using hooks. All fishing must be done with nets, and the taken creatures killed immediately and with as little suffering as possible, or their meat becomes ritually unclean as well.

- All meat, eggs, fish and dairy products sold in stores must obtain certification that they are ritually clean.

- It is illegal to drink alcohol unless there are at least 10 people present and 10 other non-drinkers who will volunteer to keep the drunks separated from the general population while they're plastered.

- It is illegal to dress in the clothes of the opposite sex without obtaining a permit explaining when, where, and for what reason.

- It is illegal to disturb a Sanrio kitten (our national animal) in the slightest way, or refuse it food or shelter if it decides to take up residence where you live.

This last law has caused Us no little consternation, what with the recent Sanrio kitten riots (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=458061) that are plaguing Our nations' cities.

A recently repealed law in the city of Azullias banned people from using laptop computers, ipods or cell phones while having sex. Three hundred people were arrested in the two weeks the law existed. Don't ask how we enforced it...

In Leninist Workers, it is illegal to...

"Give off any sort of offensive or unpleasant odors"
"Children who bully other children" (sent to labor centers for re-education)
"Flatulence is illegal"
"Obese people may not enter places where singles are congregating to meet mates"
"Old or Obese individuals may not dress in a sexually provocative manner"
"People with deformities can only go out between 9am and 4pm."
"People who change their babies diapers in public are to be fined"
"People who do not wash their hands thoroughly with anti-bacterial hand-soap are to be fined"
"People who do not take showers can be detained for up to 48 hours and be forcibly cleansed."
"Extreme Halitosis can be fined"
"People with lice or other hair problems/infectious diseases are not to leave their homes until cured"

Laws of DELGRAD.

1)It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
2)It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
3)No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July.
4)It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house.
5)Women are forbidden from wearing patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear. (Clevland)
6)It is illegal for stores to sell corn flakes on Sunday. (Columbus)
7)You cannot eat a doughnut and walk backwards on a city street. (Marion)

These are acual Ohio laws. I think the funniest is number 1, fishing for whales in Ohio.

8)If a Grizzly Bear, DELGRADs national animal, wishes to mate with you, you must allow it to do as it wishes.
9)Arson is legal if you do so for insurance reasons.
10)All time pieces are illegal.
11)Any reference to time is punishable by a maximum fine of $345,000.
12)It is legal to sleep inside of a Grizzly Bear for warmth if you are stranded in DELGRADs NAT (Northern Arctic Territory).
13)It is illegal to drink coffee unless in the presence of a Grizzly Bear and a least half of the coffee must be shared with the Grizzly Bear. This law is void if the Grizzly Bear mates with you prior to drinking the coffee.

In Pschycotic Pschycos (Shut up about the name), it is illegal to:

1. Sing in the shower while standing on your head and picking your nose.
2. Unleash a herd of cattle in your high school without parental consent.
2.1. If there is parental consent, the school cannot press charges or punish the students involved.
3. Sex is not allowed after one-thirty until five-thirty in the morning unless one's blood-alcohol content is at least .5%.
4. Roller skating backwards while listening to hip-hop, talking on the phone, counting backwards from 1000, and playing with a yo-yo.

5. Swimming in Magma Lake is strictly prohibited. (this one's actually necessary :rolleyes: )

#1: In the Military Regency of Romandeos as a whole, it is presently illegal to lash one's pet dog with a news sheet.

#2: In the city of Japova, Romandeos, it is illegal to stampede cattle without having first obtained the consent of at least two thirds of the City Council.

#3: In the small town of Briarcliff, Romandeos, it is illegal for any person who is under the age of 21 to drive a taxicab. (It should be noted that Briarcliff is incredibly small, and has no taxicab services).

#4: In the city of Dalona, Romandeos, it is illegal to urinate on a policeman without first gaining the consent of said policeman.

#5: In the city of Tasmardonia, Romandeos, it is illegal to detonate a nuclear weapon within city limits. (It should be noted that nowhere is it said that owning a nuclear weapon within city limits is illegal).

~ Romandeos.

Dumb Laws of the 501st Legion, Part 4

1. All members of 501st Legion law enforcement bodies must play Call of Duty for at least 1 hour every day. Failure to comply will result in the offender(s) getting shot in both knees with a Karabiner 98k at point-blank range.

2. It is illegal to break-dance while wielding a katana. Failure to comply will result in death by seppuku.

3. It is illegal for anyone under the age of 21 to operate a Gundam, Evangelion, or other mecha. Special permits can be obtained to bypass this law, however; these permits cost exactly $13.37 USD.

4. A license is required to play Half-Life 2. Unlicensed playing of Half-Life 2 will result in the offender(s) being forced to take care of a Headcrab for one hour.

No-one is allowed to "free-ball" (go into a pool wearing boardshorts and no Speedos) in any public pool or beach.

It's also illegal to leave the house when the President is watching TV, unless it's a weeknight or the show's a rerun.

Godulan laws:

Bluefall-

i) Swimming more than one hundred meters from the shoreline is strictly forbidden. Any attempt to do so will place the offender within automated defense sectors and result in summary execution by orbital bombardment.

ii) Any civilian boat traveling more than ten kilometers from the shoreline is strictly forbidden under similar penalties.

iii) Vacationers are required to buy at least one decorative photo to commemorate their stay under pain of being verbally assaulted by a swarm of chastising mechanical parrots who will make liberal accusations of maternal heritage as well as harsh criticisms of financial hoarding.

Alitar-

i) Throwing of snowballs at Law Officers is strictly forbidden on pain of summary kneecapping.

ii) Each household is required to have at least one (1) snowman on display on their front lawn at all times. This quota will be strictly monitored and violators will be punished by a midget kicking the violator in the shin when he/she least expects it, whereupon the violator is informed of, and told to rectify, the issue.

iii) Peeing on the electric fence is strictly forbidden. Violators will learn why.

Terivine-

i) Spitting over the rail is strictly forbidden. Violators will have the word 'Asshat' written on their forehead in ink that will not come off for a period not to exceed one (1) month.

ii) Do not make jokes about the natives. Violators will learn why.

iii) Banging the gong unless otherwise authorized to do so is strictly forbidden. Violators will immediately have poo flung at them by a band of agitated monkeys.

It is illegal in the Proletarian Dictatorship of Juche Resistance to own any money (besides your rations card of course) or to employ anyone to do work under you. To employ anyone under you is seen as slavery. Anyone that commits any of the above offences will be shot before a People's Revolutionary Court.

(Side note: ^^^ These would actually be pretty damn good laws for forming an equal society)

Also, if you fart you must capture the escaping gasses in a bottle, so that the Juche Resistance movement may later use it in terrorist actions against enemy capitalist nations.

If anyone is found eating string they must be given a banana and have the string taken off them.

no sex toy may be more then 1 meter in length

it is ilegal to say the week begins on monday

there can never be more then two andrews in the same lift at anyone time

It is ilegal to pervert a miner

anyone found commiting a sex act with an animal will be taken to a place of correction

it is ilegal to sing rolf harris/cliff richard/elton john songs punishable by having your tongue ripped from your mouth with a red hot poker.

It is illegal to:

->repermand anyone makeing out in public, given that the female's clothing has not begone to be removed. :fluffle:

->remove a female's clothing in public.

->use the metric system for anything; only the English system (fine of $500 and a manditory 6 month re-education corse).

->file a stuped law-sute (penlty: forced to pay the amount sewed for to the party that sewed plus cort fees)

->not know millitary time and Zulu time.

-> to have extra-marital sex; inter-marital, per-marital, and post-marital sex, however, is ok

->kick a male in the genitals uless the male is trying to rapew you and there is no other way you could defend your self

->peper spray any animal within 1,000ft of its home and marked property
(penlty: min(per incidit): 5 years high secerity with reguler shots of peper spry to the eyes; max: 30 years)

*bump*

Just wanted to alert people to the new thread: http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=469094

Mirkana has no stupid laws. Although we do have some unusual laws.

- Incompetence is punished by death
- Far from being illegal, vigilantism is encouraged, as long as you are pursuing an actual criminal.
- Constructive criticism is encouraged
- Tobacco is an illegal drug, on a level with marijuana

Rather than jury duty we have firing squad duty.;)

The Penalty for jumping off a building is death.

It is illegal for a woman to ask a man on a date.

Military time is the only type allowed.

It is against the law to type between the hours of 2000 hours and 2300 hundr- Oh! Crap!

It is legal to shoot a deer while it is paralyzed in someone's headlights (jacklighting), but hitting one with your car is punishable by a fine if you were travelling over the speed limit when you hit it (all deer habitats have lower speed limits).

EDIT: Also, criticism of government policies is encouraged, but comments against religion are punishable by a five hundred dollar fine.

It is illegal in Florintine to turn down a manhunt game challenge if you are in a league for the game.

It is also illegal to dress up as a witch and try to scare the decendents of the Great Hero of Florintine-General Damtree.

In the Capitalist Confederacy, it is illeagal to detonate a nuclear device within city limits. By doing so you will be fined 500$. This is also legislation in Florida...

It is also illegal to tickle someone to death...I think this one comes from Ohio

>In Alpharis(capital of the Letter A), it is illegal for anyone under the age of .2095876 years to ride a roller-coaster(enforced).

>It is illegal for any member of the Letter A royal family to have sex with anyone who is not a member of a foreign royal family.(which is especially wierd because the monarchy has been abolished, but the law remains. unenforced).

>The above law is even wierder because there is another law stating that anyone caught having sex within national borders will be sentenced to death by lethal injection(enforced).

>No one who is over three inches tall is allowed inside Alpharis city limits. This includes sentients, animals, and plants(enforced).

>It is illegal for anyone taller than the president to look him straight in the eye(unenforced).

>It is illegal to clone evil superhuman warriors without a federally-issued license...

...Unless you are a member of the president's political party(enforced).

>All dieties, gods, and prophets must be reffered to as "That Guy Who Does Not Exist." Even if said diety, god, or prophet is female. Violation of this law is punishible by a stupid-slap.

In luchamos:

-In male resterooms, it is illegal to use a urinal next to someone else if another is available farther away.
-It is illegal for anyone to lick there own ear
-It is illegal for anyone to like the St. Louis Cardinals
-It is illegal for the St. Louis Cardinals to win a game (punishable by slow tortous death at the hands of a yound bear and a politically incorrect Brave)
-It is illegal to put a live Giant Squid in a toaster. (Note the live part)

Some real laws:
In Chicago, it is illegal to go fishing in pajamas
In Texas it is illegal to shoot the bow tie off of a sheriff
My laws:
It is illegal to turn people into newts, punishable by burning at the stake
It is illegal to own a rabid attack bunny during daylight hours, unless one possesses a Holy Hand Grenade
French people are illegal
Cows may not be airborn, except when I (the king) really feel like it
It is illegal to conjour fire in other people's bedrooms between 6 pm and midnight, unless your name is Tim
It is illegal to buy coconuts, but possessing them is legal
It is illegal to eat ham, jam, or spam outside of Camelot

It is illegal for you to have a jamaican accent unless your the grim reaper, Punished by Death

It is Illegal for you to own a DoDo Punished by beating to death with Dodo (not enforced, dodos are all dead)

It is illegal for ANYONE to have a larger Penis/Brests then the Chairmen/lady, Punished by size reduction at your own cost (not enforced...much)

ILLEGAL

It is illegal to performe magic while nude

To make out in a hot spring

to cast the giggles jinx

to go whale hunting on a Sunday

To have sex, while clothed

to throw your staff at any sports offical

to fish on Sunday

It is lillegal to wear anything but Mage Robes (paritally enforced)

To summon lightning during a lightning storm

For females to have low-cuts

For boys to not wear the appropriate hat with the mage robes (not enforced)

For a girl to leave her hair lose while doing magic

It is illegal for someone not to watch Star Trek. We also force our population to mate once every seven years.

It is illegal for a Women to Become a Commissar in the Supreme Council, without approval from the Emperor and the Comrade Generalissmo.

In luchamos:

-In male resterooms, it is illegal to use a urinal next to someone else if another is available farther away.
-It is illegal for anyone to lick there own ear
-It is illegal for anyone to like the St. Louis Cardinals
-It is illegal for the St. Louis Cardinals to win a game (punishable by slow tortous death at the hands of a yound bear and a politically incorrect Brave)
-It is illegal to put a live Giant Squid in a toaster. (Note the live part)
Good law, good law.

Pacitalia doesn't have any dumb laws, because we're elitist. ;)

Yurka's laws vary from city to city, but here are a few of them in the largest cities...

In Yurka City II...


It is illegal to have sex with a foreigner outside of a brothel... Ever. This law is punishable by being banished from Yurka forever. (Enforced)

It is illegal for Corporate Defense Forces to come within ten miles of Obelisk. This will be treated with an immediate attack by the government. (Enforced)

It is illegal to willingly spread any form of STD. This will result in your immediate execution and the possible banishment or imprisonment of who you have intercourse with. (Enforced)

It is illegal to walk your pet in public in an undesignated area. (Enforced)

It is illegal to sexually harass anyone of either gender. If there is a witness you will be forced to attend a formal education class on the subject on your first offense. On a second you will be sent off to a labor camp. (Enforced)

It is illegal to name any brothel after a royal family member. (Enforced)

It is illegal to be homeless. If caught you will be sent to a forced labor camp. (Enforced)

It is illegal to interrupt a formal duel in any way. Punishment of this is up to those involved. (Enforced in most cities)

Urinating on the street is punishable by 10 years in a forced labor camp.


In Terra...


It is illegal to carve your name into a tree. Punishment is five years of official Enviornmental Clean-up. (Enforced)

Any form of pollution above the allowed minimum will face strict fines. (Enforced)

It is illegal to go whaling. Ironically Terra is not landlocked.

It is illegal to sing to a government official.

It is illegal to indirectly cause a species to go extinct.


In North City...


It is illegal to use Zeith Branca's picture as a dart board. If found doing so you will be forced to formally appologise to him. At that point he will be able to do what he sees fit with you.

It is illegal to rudely refuse should Zeith Branca propose to you.

Urinating on the street is punishable by having to spend three years in a labor camp.

Murder is alright on the killing fields outside of the Branca estate, where upon one must make it to his manner alive. If you make it past his defenses, you will be awarded any one wish within his power. In the past ten years, this has only been done two times. (Enforced)

Clogging a geothermal vent is punishable by a public whipping.

On Zeith Branca's birthday, everyone in the populace must enter a valid photograph into the city database for the marriage raffle. If selected, and one refuses after the week trial period, they must undergo three challenges chosen by Zeith himself. If they succeed they will be eligible for a single wish. (Enforced)

Tampering with the City Database is gounds for complete dismissal and forced entry into Bleak's gladiator pits, whereupon they must win ten successive times before being released. (Enforced)

If there are non-unisex bathrooms present, both must be identically furnished. (Enforced)



In Agua...


It is illegal to give mustache rides on Tuesdays.

Attempting to block out the sun is grounds for being laughed at and sent to remedial science classes in Bleak. (Comically Enforced)

Expelling waste into the ocean is grounds for being caned by a group of elderly old men, who will make fun of you as they hit you. (Comically enforced)

It is illegal to bring Eckie Cola aboard a submarine. If done, you will be fined 125 USD. (Semi-Enforced)



In Baccarat...


It is illegal to die. Those who break this law will face a 5000 USD fine. If unable to pay this fine the body will be disposed of without a burial or funeral of any kind. (Enforced)

It is illegal to engage in a public orgy of more than 8 people without a permit. (Enforced)

All drugs are legal, despite any side effects, as long as the recipient is aware of the consequences beforehand. (Enforced)

Fat or Obese members of the populace will be sent to fat camps until such a time they are the recommended weight according to the Baccarat Board of Beauty. (Enforced occasionally)

Anyone may gamble in a casino. This includes children, animals which are capable of doing such, and the criminally insane, among others. (Enforced)



In Bleak...


It is illegal to attend at least one play a year. (Not enforced)

The underground portions of the city are not to be used for dumping waste. (Enforced, since people live there)

Rigging a Gladiator fight is grounds for execution. (Enforced)

The Grand Champion of the Gladiator Pits may legally veto any law once a year. (Enforced)

Attempting to bring more sunlight into Bleak is grounds for being jailed for one year. (Enforced sparingly)

Any marriages between immediate family members are to be done in designated areas. (Enforced)

If two duelists become wed, the nation will pay for the first wedding. (Enforced)

When doing the Play "KavaKura", it must always be done in the theater district. (Enforced)

Infibulation is mandatory for all females in United Somali Republic.

I think that's a stupid law in itself Paci. :p

I think that's a stupid law in itself Paci. :p

Heh, true - though it's basically because Pacitalia is so libertarian that we only have the laws necessary to maintain an orderly, functioning society. None of these unnecessary laws, though I'm sure you could say there used to be a few dumb ones in la Repubblica.

It is illegal in MelekTaus to use either Jesus Christ, or God as swear words or in vain unless you are a Satanist.

It is illegal in MelekTaus for any Empress to be replaced by a male unless it is after her death.

It is enforced that every satanist in MelekTaus pay due respect to other religions, and vice versa. I.E Insults or racist remarks in the nation are punished by slow, and painfull death.

Good law, good law.
It should be enforcable by death:mad: