Jenrak
11-08-2005, 03:36
After watching many, many new players blow it by thinking their invincible, I've decided to gather the best information as possible on announcements on being obnoxious and undermined.
Also, my other thread on N00bishness is:
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=413018&highlight=%28humor+thread%29
So, without further ado, let me introduce:
~~OBNOXIOUS ANNOUNCEMENTS AND OTHER THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T DO BUT DO ANYWAYS~~
"HELLO, i'M MIZTER IDIOT. SE HOW I'M TALKING LIKE THIS? IT'S NOT PERFECT, BUT OON ENOUGH YOU'LL ALL TALK LIKE ME AND YOU'LL BE GETTING *ALOT* OF ATTENTION. REMEMBRE THAT TALKING LIKE ME *COULD...OH WHAT AM I KIDDING...WILL* GET YOU BANNED IF KEEP IT UP!!! L337 HAZX0R!"
Example 1:
"I Nuked J00!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahhahaha!!!!"
Oh no, this is wrong. All wrong. The stupid is there, and the exclamation marks, but you want to look professional but you're a n00b, so you can't. So you want something that'll cover it all, but not something of good Role Playing quality. You're a lazy slacker...start acting like one! The real one should be like this:
"I R God and Nuked j00 losers cus I have secret backer supplying me w/ n00ks!! Lol!!!!!! But you don't knwo who it is cus he's a secret.!!!!
Example 2:
"Because Country A is an idiot, I, Country B, will invade his country.
Tsk Tsk Tsk. You can do better. What if they're stronger than you? You're a n00b, and you WANT to drag everyone around you down as well! Here's a better one:
"Country A is a jerk, and I demand all countries to side with me or else I'll invade everyone!"
Example 3:
"I challenge everyone to a one on one battle against me!
What are you thinking? You shouldn't spread such low quality muck around. You have smilies. Use them, or as n00bs who lose say: OOC: Go to Hell!!!!! What you should be focusing on it something like this:
"Anyone who thinks they're remotely close to beating me come on! I'll beat them into the ground!!!! :mp5: :mp5:
Example 4:
"I declare war on the UN!!!!!!"
Hahahahahahaha! No. The UN is a gameplay, not the actual UN. You must know this. Not even a stupid n00b would be able to piss off the UN, which is what you are evidently trying to do. The better, stronger, more improved version (and also sexier sometimes) would be as so:
I DECLARE WAR ON THE LEGIONS CUS THEY'RE A$$HOLES AND THEIR LEADER CALLED ME STUPID ALTHOUGH I CAN'T PROVE IT!!!!!!
Example 5:
"As a formal declaration of War, I have steadfastly mobolized an army against the forces Country A, where naval battallions and troops are preparing to invade enemy territory. Country A has no reason to reject the declaration whatsoever."
Sneaky Godmoding is for smart n00bs. Oh wait, what am I thinking? N00bs aren't smart, or else they would'nt be called n00bs! Well, you see, from the normal person, it looks like it's formal and proper, until you see, 'has no reason to reject', which throws the whole formality out of the window. Why be subtle? There's no point. They'll just call you a liar. You don't want to be a liar, do you? You just wanna be a n00b!
"I have an army out of nowhere without prior moboloization (notice the typo?) RPing and I will invade you and I am on your beach now. your turn!"
Example 6:
"I'm playing the terrorist card by saying that I have spies in yoru country who are causing dissent. Your people are now all under my control and a riot breaks out! I win!"
*gasps* One of the most lethal and rarest N00b threads around. You start an RP in one thread and end it in one, plus it's barely telegram worthy! Why do it then if this one is so badly formed? Try this on for size:
"I WIN! YOU LOSEEEEEEEEEEEE!" (Insert profane stolen smilie from photobucket here)
Example 7:
"We will purge the universe of all (insert species/fancy spice here) because God is on our side!"
Bringing religion into the group, huh? Well not if I can help it. God probably has better things to then help you in your genocidal rage, which then brings me to the 'comeback' post:
"Well god told me to!!!! Cus I'm so amazing!"
Right. God told you to kill a species that he made himself? He made it just you, and you alone can commit genocide on it? Please. Take something believable at least. Like this:
"We will kill and murder all children of the (insert species/environmentally friendly type car here) because my Cheerios told me too! Man I love Cheerios (some OOC rambling for the authentic effect)"
Example 8:
"World Leaders, we have 1 million nuclear missiles hidden in our country! We will detonate them if you do not take in our demands."
Subtle, but stupid. I love this one. But it shows alot of places for improvements. First of all, Nationstates is home to many countries that could be classified as 'World Leaders' worthy, so if you're willing to wage war against every respectable Role Player here, then do so! But first, get your act together. Do something cooler. Stash your nukes somewhere. Like this:
"All countries over 1 billion population, we have 30000 kajillion supernuclear-mega-defracto-raygar missiles hidden on the moon. We will launch them at the sun and blow up teh (another sneaky typo) sun so you will all starve to death unless you give into our infinite demands!!!! (insert random smilies here)
Courtesy of Leafanistan
Example 9:"I hate your tacatics adn politicaliticsicsics so I'm magically pop out of nowhere and blockade your nation LLOLOLAOAL"
Very smart. Cunning and swift. You want to cripple their nations for an IC reason (or at least you want them to think), but a step better is to get everyone involved. That way you'll get more negative attention. It may be negative, but it's still attention, right?
Yo taktics sux adn yur political freedoms r bad even tho mine r worse so i come out of nowear and blockade yur nation and al yur allies helping yur nations. what the hell. every nation going to you! lolol omg i had a massive |30ner!
Well, that's it for our lesson for today! Know that YOU have the power, to mess up your reputation....forever! Or at least, for 99% of your RPing lives. Have fun pissing off the mods!
Note that Jenrak does not encourage you to piss off the moderators and this disclaimer proves it...sucker.
Also, my other thread on N00bishness is:
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=413018&highlight=%28humor+thread%29
So, without further ado, let me introduce:
~~OBNOXIOUS ANNOUNCEMENTS AND OTHER THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T DO BUT DO ANYWAYS~~
"HELLO, i'M MIZTER IDIOT. SE HOW I'M TALKING LIKE THIS? IT'S NOT PERFECT, BUT OON ENOUGH YOU'LL ALL TALK LIKE ME AND YOU'LL BE GETTING *ALOT* OF ATTENTION. REMEMBRE THAT TALKING LIKE ME *COULD...OH WHAT AM I KIDDING...WILL* GET YOU BANNED IF KEEP IT UP!!! L337 HAZX0R!"
Example 1:
"I Nuked J00!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahhahaha!!!!"
Oh no, this is wrong. All wrong. The stupid is there, and the exclamation marks, but you want to look professional but you're a n00b, so you can't. So you want something that'll cover it all, but not something of good Role Playing quality. You're a lazy slacker...start acting like one! The real one should be like this:
"I R God and Nuked j00 losers cus I have secret backer supplying me w/ n00ks!! Lol!!!!!! But you don't knwo who it is cus he's a secret.!!!!
Example 2:
"Because Country A is an idiot, I, Country B, will invade his country.
Tsk Tsk Tsk. You can do better. What if they're stronger than you? You're a n00b, and you WANT to drag everyone around you down as well! Here's a better one:
"Country A is a jerk, and I demand all countries to side with me or else I'll invade everyone!"
Example 3:
"I challenge everyone to a one on one battle against me!
What are you thinking? You shouldn't spread such low quality muck around. You have smilies. Use them, or as n00bs who lose say: OOC: Go to Hell!!!!! What you should be focusing on it something like this:
"Anyone who thinks they're remotely close to beating me come on! I'll beat them into the ground!!!! :mp5: :mp5:
Example 4:
"I declare war on the UN!!!!!!"
Hahahahahahaha! No. The UN is a gameplay, not the actual UN. You must know this. Not even a stupid n00b would be able to piss off the UN, which is what you are evidently trying to do. The better, stronger, more improved version (and also sexier sometimes) would be as so:
I DECLARE WAR ON THE LEGIONS CUS THEY'RE A$$HOLES AND THEIR LEADER CALLED ME STUPID ALTHOUGH I CAN'T PROVE IT!!!!!!
Example 5:
"As a formal declaration of War, I have steadfastly mobolized an army against the forces Country A, where naval battallions and troops are preparing to invade enemy territory. Country A has no reason to reject the declaration whatsoever."
Sneaky Godmoding is for smart n00bs. Oh wait, what am I thinking? N00bs aren't smart, or else they would'nt be called n00bs! Well, you see, from the normal person, it looks like it's formal and proper, until you see, 'has no reason to reject', which throws the whole formality out of the window. Why be subtle? There's no point. They'll just call you a liar. You don't want to be a liar, do you? You just wanna be a n00b!
"I have an army out of nowhere without prior moboloization (notice the typo?) RPing and I will invade you and I am on your beach now. your turn!"
Example 6:
"I'm playing the terrorist card by saying that I have spies in yoru country who are causing dissent. Your people are now all under my control and a riot breaks out! I win!"
*gasps* One of the most lethal and rarest N00b threads around. You start an RP in one thread and end it in one, plus it's barely telegram worthy! Why do it then if this one is so badly formed? Try this on for size:
"I WIN! YOU LOSEEEEEEEEEEEE!" (Insert profane stolen smilie from photobucket here)
Example 7:
"We will purge the universe of all (insert species/fancy spice here) because God is on our side!"
Bringing religion into the group, huh? Well not if I can help it. God probably has better things to then help you in your genocidal rage, which then brings me to the 'comeback' post:
"Well god told me to!!!! Cus I'm so amazing!"
Right. God told you to kill a species that he made himself? He made it just you, and you alone can commit genocide on it? Please. Take something believable at least. Like this:
"We will kill and murder all children of the (insert species/environmentally friendly type car here) because my Cheerios told me too! Man I love Cheerios (some OOC rambling for the authentic effect)"
Example 8:
"World Leaders, we have 1 million nuclear missiles hidden in our country! We will detonate them if you do not take in our demands."
Subtle, but stupid. I love this one. But it shows alot of places for improvements. First of all, Nationstates is home to many countries that could be classified as 'World Leaders' worthy, so if you're willing to wage war against every respectable Role Player here, then do so! But first, get your act together. Do something cooler. Stash your nukes somewhere. Like this:
"All countries over 1 billion population, we have 30000 kajillion supernuclear-mega-defracto-raygar missiles hidden on the moon. We will launch them at the sun and blow up teh (another sneaky typo) sun so you will all starve to death unless you give into our infinite demands!!!! (insert random smilies here)
Courtesy of Leafanistan
Example 9:"I hate your tacatics adn politicaliticsicsics so I'm magically pop out of nowhere and blockade your nation LLOLOLAOAL"
Very smart. Cunning and swift. You want to cripple their nations for an IC reason (or at least you want them to think), but a step better is to get everyone involved. That way you'll get more negative attention. It may be negative, but it's still attention, right?
Yo taktics sux adn yur political freedoms r bad even tho mine r worse so i come out of nowear and blockade yur nation and al yur allies helping yur nations. what the hell. every nation going to you! lolol omg i had a massive |30ner!
Well, that's it for our lesson for today! Know that YOU have the power, to mess up your reputation....forever! Or at least, for 99% of your RPing lives. Have fun pissing off the mods!
Note that Jenrak does not encourage you to piss off the moderators and this disclaimer proves it...sucker.