NationStates Jolt Archive


Guffingfords Big Keg O' Facts version 666

Guffingford
12-06-2005, 10:24
OOC Information

Instead of just throwing down some things on how powerful my economy is, how swell my nation is to live in I'm gonna do it totally different. After reading Pacitalia's and Sarzonia's factbook I cannot deny the lay-out looks very good, but there's one big letdown which is: where are the lacking things of your nation? This Big Keg o' Facts is a factbook, but dedicated to what isn't good in Guffingford. Here's a major part of the history of Guffingford, Holy Panooly and Theohuanacu. http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=8775353&postcount=1 You'll find some information on Guffingfordian vexiollogy in there, as well as other important stuff. Maybe it's a bit outdated, perhaps I'll update it one day when I feel like it.

IC Information

Question and Answer - semi IC

Q(estion): What kind of country is Guffingford? Just another thirteen in a dozen tinpot dictatorship?

A(nswer): Nope, Guffingford is a dictatorship pretending to be the democracy of all democracies. Guffingford prides itself in civil rights, progressive ones, such as legal abortion and euthenasia. Unlike its more socialist counter parts, Guffingford isn't the capitalist freehold many think of. Please read the article on the economy to learn more about it. To be a little more specific and according to the United Nations with which Guffingford has a strange hate/love relation Guffingford is a 'Father Knows Best State'. It's description on the unofficial NationStates encyclopedia (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/UN_Category) our nation is described as the following:
The government will usually interfere in the lives of everyone. It works like a parent. One does what they think is best. Something that's not too far from the truth.

Q: What is Guffingford's stance on important issues of the world that does not directly affect the nation?

A: If it doesn't directly affect us, we have no reason to interfere or pay attention to it. If one of Guffingford's allies is threatened we will act, on the condition it's not provoked by our ally. We are not the first fools who mindless toss our boys in the first best firefight. Our allies have grown up leaders who can handle wars. If it's their own fault to be attacked by many enemies, we will not take action.

Q: Guffingford has an apartheid regime. We don't like that, why not change it to something less racist and more... political correct? Nazism and thus racial prejudice haven't done the world any good did they?

A: OOCly spoken, this is a game. I don't care how wrong my nation is, how oppressive it is and how many innocent people I murder in other nations. Several people take this game for too seriously. I play what I want to play, and if anyone tells me on msn or OOCly in game to change my nation I'll politely tell him to do that someplace else.

ICly, Guffingford is Guffingford and we do not listen to others who tell us what to do. If you try something that makes us change our current political course, you can expect something in return. Action is reaction.

Q: What do you think about the older and newer more established powers such as... Gholgoth and Haven?

A: Scorn and mockery in most cases. Respect and compassion to very few others. We see the region of Haven as a region where people live their lives, a tight but not hostile community. Diplomatic bonds with the nations of Praetonia and Hogsweat are bettering and we are proud of that. Gholgoth on the other hand is a freakhole [our IC opinion] where only the worst inbred humans live. Their leader is a puppet master and the others in the region are soulless automatons who volunteer to be sacrificed only to keep their leader high and dry in situations he can't handle.

Map
Click here (http://img295.echo.cx/img295/6645/map28gf.jpg) to see the map of Guffingford.

Climate

The Guffingfordian climate is hot combination of sub-tropical rainforests in the central southern highlands and on the shores of virtually the entire nation, except for the utmost northern freestates. Cerfonlande, Neuland and Gruneberg are lush, abundant farmlands with many evergreen tropical forests while the more inland parts of Neuland and Neu-Bayern are savannas and badlands. Windhoek is the most northern city on mainland Guffingford, where temperatures reach 50°C in mid summer, and -40°C from December to May. There's no autumn or spring, only summer and winter. The rest of the Guffingfordian continent has a varied and more pleasant climate.

The main freestate (an independent republic - Vrye Republiek Rooi-Nassau) consists of valleys with fresh, young green all year round but dry and rocky highlands. Most of the gold and palladium mines are found there. All the mining expeditions in the early 1900's have turned a once peaceful and serene landscape with canyons (of equal beauty as the Grand Canyon) into a wasteland and the local population call that place the 'Cheese Mountains', because all of the holes blasted and dug into the cliffside. Vrystaat Oos Seeland is a large wide open area that's almost entirely made of sanddunes in the central area's, except to the northern part where small forests and green meadows lie. Redmound lies on the border of these two zones. 90% of Oos Seeland is unsuited for human life because of the extreme temperatures and the wind creating dust storms around the clock. The small once British settlement of Gloucterbury is mainly savanna that closely resembles the well known African savanna. It's dry, except for the rain season.

All in all the climate of Guffingford is only 'human friendly' near the shores, but the further you go inland, the dryer it gets.

Terrain

As explained in the first part, Guffingford is a mountainous, overall dry nation. Desertification is the biggest threat to the outlying farming communities, and extensive irrigation projects have stopped further expansion of the deserts. Destructive landuse and mismanagement continue to disturb well thought out plans of crop rotation, however this is improving thanks to many government projects.

Economy

When you say Guffingford's economy, you say Tsarist Russia, except for the slavery. Extensive railroad networks have been laid with capital from foreign corporations because the Guffingfordian economy - 82% mining industry, metal working, argiculture and other raw material processing and plastic related industries - is incapable of raising funds for massive projects. Banks are not state owned, but there are too few to get the economy going and to exploit all natural resources. The monetary system is also backwards and old, paper money is only used for the highest denominations (DG 1000, DG 2500, DG 5000 and DG 10,000, ten thousand Ducat Guilder banknotes are only used for government loans in cash) while plastic money is non-existent. The population of Guffingford still use coins as their first means of payment, and Guffingford is probably one of the last nations on earth who keep on using a monetary system based on gold and silver coins. The coin denomination is as follows:

DG 100: 17.63 gram gold bullion coin
DG 50: 14.51 gram gold bullion coin
DG 15: 11.083 gram gold bullion coin
DG 10: 9.549 gram gold bullion coin
DG 7.5: 6.54 gram gold bullion coin
DG 5: 4.288 gram gold bullion coin
DG 3: 5 gram silver bullion coin
DG 2: 3 gram silver bullion coin
DG 1: 2 gram silver bullion coin

This is an incredibly backwards system because normally a currency is based on the national gold reserve, these coins float on the international gold and silver value so fluctuations direcly affect the currecy having a positive or negative effect. Hyper inflation is a common phenomenon, because the economy is so ill organised, major gold findings allow the national gold price to make a free fall, so the government declares part of the national gold reserve 'non existent' to halt the inflation. During the Great Depression of 1931, the biggest platinum ore deposits were found near Änglenbach in the history of the pacific which caused a drop in coin value that made 100 grams of platinum worth $70. These extremes have been ruled out by now, but major value changes still occur. This makes the Guffingfordian economy extremely unstable. On itself the economy is imploded, but because of hundreds of foreign syndicates the economy has a small technology sector (IT, graphic design, telecommunication) but the raw materials handling is by far the biggest. Technology itself is rare for the common Guffingfordian where personal computers are only affordable by the very wealthy and televisions can only be bought by joint effort. Internet doesn't exist for the normal citizen. Only the military has the funds and means to have the most advanced tech available. The normal working class only uses bronze and silver coins, while the gold is only for major purchases. The economy also suffers from international boycots because of the enduring policies of apartheid and blatant racism. The boycots haven't significantly damaged the Guffingfordian economy simply because of regular sales of large quantities of non existent gold. The system of Guffingfordian coinage as it is now, the most complicated system ever thought up. Explaining how it exactly works is an impossible task. Even the most experienced and clever people in the know on the Ministry of Finance and Economy can't quite figure it out. There are other coins as well, and only recently the Patch Act has been repelled. A heavily simplified explanation of these set of regulations meant the end of the Leighmar Ducat (LD), Weddlepong Penny (WP) and other currencies made in several small freestates and semi-independent republics. All these coinage systems have been outlawed, making the economy more accessible to the normal citizen. Here are a few examples. Instead of two or three values the Guffingfordian coinage system had seven. Only three remain, the Cent, Guilder and Ducat Guilder. The rest has been declared illegal tender.

Weddlepong Penny > Cent > Shilling > Guilder > Ducat > Ducat Guilder > Standard > Gold Standard (aka Leighmar Ducat).

On a sidenote, the coins may be declared illegal tender, the gold value still stands and so does the weight of the gold. So they're illegal to pay an item with the denominated value minted, but buying something with the silver or gold weight of the coin is legal.

Export
Diamonds, coal, gold

Import
Cotton, timber, manure, propane, plant seeds, fresh water, aluminium, steel, iron, cast iron.

Raw materials
Gold, oil, coal, diamonds, platnium, very little iron and titanium.

Guffingford has large iron ore deposits, but they're either too deep to mine or it's financially not possible to start such a project. The iron found in Guffingford is mostly confiscated by the military. Because oil is found in international waters claimed by Guffingford, it cannot be sold so Guffingford is stuck with an immense oil remainder. There are not enough processing plants to refine the oil and because of a conservative stance on preservence of the natural environment the government refuses to build oil powerplants. Cotton plants don't grow in Guffingford, and there's not enough lifestock to produce the needed quantities of manure to fertilize the land.

Social Structure

The Guffingfordian social structure is totally fucked up as foreigners say. Natives and poor immigrants work in the mines and on the land, while a small part of the civillian population have the money to open up shops - supermarkets only exist in major urban centers - with a rich toplayer having the best jobs in the public sector or in the commercial sector. Industrial bosses are also mayer, creating an endless vicious cycle for the working class with prospects of betterment are nil. By no means they live a poor life; there's always plenty of food and they enjoy national sports and festivals. Money however...

The native population only has a half-citizenship status. This means they're not allowed to leave the country, but are allowed to roam through all the freestates. Natives don't have the same rights in court, divorce is illegal between native couples and white people and natives may not engage in (homo)sexual relations or marriage. Busses have a 'white' and 'black' zone, same with trains, airplanes and taxis are not allowed to carry native passengers. Native indians of Polynesian decent however have significant more rights than their black cousins, former slaves. In 1901 it was decided by Jan Gooshen (founder of the Gooshenite Freestate aka Freestate Gooshen) that slavery had to be abolished to promote trade and to give the Guffingfordian economy, severely damaged by the oil wars, a boost. Jan Gooshen was a very liberal thinker, a progressive politician and his thoughts and laws still make Gooshen the forefront of civil and political freedoms in Guffingford. in 1902 slavery was outlawed in Guffingford.

Military, Law and Order

Known throughout the world. The sheer manpower, high tech navy and soon a powerful airforce it is said that the army is the only effective part of the government. This is untrue, because corruption reach to the very heights of the whole apparatus, disrupting the chain of command. Naval commanders can bribe their way out of nasty situations, piracy is a normal way of earning some extra money and smuggling is secretly endorsed by the Ministry of Defence. Despite of all the downsides and lapses in organisation, the Guffingfordian People's Force is an army to reckon with.

The policeforce is Guffingford is oppressive, but not corrupt. The unofficial police motto is, shoot and don't ask any questions. Criminals, whether they be streetscum from gangs or rapists are jailed without questioning and left to rot at the police officer's discretion. Shoplifters usually get out after a beating or a few nights in the "fridge". Torture, though not illegal, is rarely used to extract information.

Health, Education & Infrastructure

The health network in Guffingford is, in comparison to other more "civilized" nations not very good if you look solely at the hospitals. It's not that it operations inefficient, citizens are taught to be self-supportive at all times. A broken leg is treaten at home, not in a first aid station. Basic medical assistance can be given by virtually any citizen to any citizen. Military hospitals are the best of the best in the world.

Education. Needed or not, the opinions on this particular subject are divided. Guffingfordians are workers and fighters, not thinkers. Pick a Guffingfordian citizen and he can build a strong cabin from wood and stone, everything fitting like it's been designed by an architect. But give the same person a piece of paper and a pencil and tell him to write a simple story without errors in spelling and grammar, chances are he will fail miserably. The Guffingfordian society is largely made of steelworkers, fine metalworkers, miners, farmers and other forms of hard labour. Because the ranks of commanding officer and regular soldier are seperated, normal privates don't need to write. Most of them can, but it ain't error free.

More to come on Infrastructure!

Will be updated whenever needed. All input is welcome, as long as it's positive!
Farmina
12-06-2005, 10:30
I like it, but change the section title colour. You get a good grasp on the nation quickly, which I feel is a strength.
Huzen Hagen
12-06-2005, 11:01
nice, obviously put alot of work into it. Good take and its nice to see an imperfect economy for once
Kriegorgrad
12-06-2005, 11:01
OoC: Thank god, a factbook that realises that barely anyone has every resource they need in their own country!
Independent Hitmen
12-06-2005, 11:49
-taggage for a read in the near future now im back :)-
Guffingford
12-06-2005, 12:06
OoC:Thank god, a factbook that realises that barely anyone has every resource they need in their own country!Not only that, the resources aren't even exploited because of serious mismanagement and lack knowledge and know-how. Corporations that enter Guffingford are either bought by the state with 'non existent' gold, only to make them part state owned, partially owned by a small group of shareholders (former owners in nine out of ten cases).
The Merchant Guilds
12-06-2005, 13:26
Indeed, imperfections are a good thing... well done Guff.
Concador
12-06-2005, 14:42
OOC: I know it doesn't belong here, but Guffingford, please respond to your other thread 'The List'.
The Island of Rose
12-06-2005, 15:12
Law & Order
Oppressive, but not corrupt. The unofficial police motto is, shoot and don't ask any questions. Criminals, whether they be streetscum from gangs or rapists, they're usually executed on sight.

Ironically, this is how the Rosians handle criminals. Who needs jails when they're DEAD.

Anyway, good job. Guff isn't the uber State we thought :P
Guffingford
12-06-2005, 15:22
OOC: I know it doesn't belong here, but Guffingford, please respond to your other thread 'The List'.I will soon enough.

@ The Island of Rose: I'm kind of annoyed by all the nations who have everything in their soil. Gold, diamonds, uranium, cobalt, oil, gas... Not to mention a perfect powergrid, spotless infrastructure and surprisingly, every single economy is world famous. I think the only ones who have the right calling their economy 'world famous' or top of the line are people who are in the top 50 or 100.
The Macabees
12-06-2005, 15:33
[OOC: Nice. I think you might have persuaded me to make my own factbook (I have one, not updated and it sucks). But nevertheless, nice job. And as everyone else is saying, good job making your country realistic.]
The Island of Rose
12-06-2005, 15:38
I will soon enough.

@ The Island of Rose: I'm kind of annoyed by all the nations who have everything in their soil. Gold, diamonds, uranium, cobalt, oil, gas... Not to mention a perfect powergrid, spotless infrastructure and surprisingly, every single economy is world famous. I think the only ones who have the right calling their economy 'world famous' or top of the line are people who are in the top 50 or 100.

Heh heh. Yarr, TIOR imports most of their minerals. >_>

Though I must update mine, alot. We're not exactly TIOR anymore... we're "The Imperial Union" a giant umbrella for all of the states part of it (New Rose, New Roska, New Eltengrad, China, Cuba, TIOR, and Sardinia) so therefore I need to make factbooks on all of them and explain the complicated legislature needed to run this. Oh, and I still don't have a Constitution.

Anywho, now I'm just ranting >_>
Guffingford
12-06-2005, 16:46
I kind of abandoned the earth X scene, it was boring and pointess. Nothing happened on E1, and making my own nation gave much more flexibility in just about everything. I don't have a constitution either, and I feel smug with it. Hell, I'm not gonna write ten pages of legal drivel. Waste of time.
The Island of Rose
12-06-2005, 16:51
I kind of abandoned the earth X scene, it was boring and pointess. Nothing happened on E1, and making my own nation gave much more flexibility in just about everything. I don't have a constitution either, and I feel smug with it. Hell, I'm not gonna write ten pages of legal drivel. Waste of time.

Yarr, but the Earth lands are in my own special multiverse of doom :x
Guffingford
12-06-2005, 17:34
Yarr, but the Earth lands are in my own special multiverse of doom :xWhy need an earth to RP? Why not create an archipelago similar in terrain... All this earth crap is irritating the piss out of me because it blocks progress. Everybody is hold up in their own earths and the few who do RP as a nationstate can't be part of an earth because they're not a member.

Vicious cycle!
The Island of Rose
12-06-2005, 17:37
Why need an earth to RP? Why not create an archipelago similar in terrain... All this earth crap is irritating the piss out of me because it blocks progress. Everybody is hold up in their own earths and the few who do RP as a nationstate can't be part of an earth because they're not a member.

Vicious cycle!

Because I'm lazy.
Guffingford
13-06-2005, 15:44
Because I'm lazy.Amazing reason. Simply amazing.
Roach-Busters
13-06-2005, 16:05
Awesome job, Guff. :)
Guffingford
13-06-2005, 16:15
Added some more stuff! Thanks RB
Sarzonia
13-06-2005, 16:20
Why need an earth to RP? Why not create an archipelago similar in terrain... All this earth crap is irritating the piss out of me because it blocks progress. Everybody is hold up in their own earths and the few who do RP as a nationstate can't be part of an earth because they're not a member.

Vicious cycle!Presses the "what he said" button.

I wish we didn't have to deal with all the restrictions on participating in Earths. It's one big reason I don't want to deal with most of them.
Guffingford
13-06-2005, 16:39
Presses the "what he said" button.

I wish we didn't have to deal with all the restrictions on participating in Earths. It's one big reason I don't want to deal with most of them.I think the whole problem lies with people feeling uncomfortable with the thought of creating a whole nation from scrap. Earths are easy, simple and you get what you want instantly: war. That's why nations who create their nations whether it be FT or MT earn my respect points instead of saying I am Rhodesia or China or whatever.
Guffingford
04-07-2005, 15:59
I'm not really fond of bumps, but here goes.

Up to top
The Parthians
04-07-2005, 16:17
OOC: Excellent factbook, though your economy looks like a mess to me. If you allow foreign investment, I bet plenty of Parthian companies would be interested in some sort of buisness venture.
Guffingford
04-07-2005, 16:27
OOC: Excellent factbook, though your economy looks like a mess to me. If you allow foreign investment, I bet plenty of Parthian companies would be interested in some sort of buisness venture.Would be fun, but I actually like the mess my economy is. Fragile as it is, it kind of works. Maybe I ought to add some more in-dept stuff on my people, tourism and some extended information on other but less important categories.