NationStates Jolt Archive

OOC: This is not the beginning of the Wars. This is the setting up of the wars. So your characters can come into Camel Eaters. But they can't do anything extremely violent.........yet.

IC:

In the OutJack (name for the wilds of Camel Eaters) somewhere around the Dalcassian City of Birmingham a woman sat down in the forests. She carried only small gear and a few discs. She waited even longer for the others to appear. Most of them old some young they almost sprang from the brush all around. She stood. Her twisted frame cracked with age and racked with pain she stepped forward and handed the discs to those assembled. They bowed and left her, Matriarch of the Order of Gahlan, to assume her place in society once more. She hobbled through the woods and into the nursing home. Creeping softly into her bed she felt the breath come from her once more. Her training as a Bard had truly helped tonight. Otherwise her ancient body would've never been able to accomplish any task.

An Keehan received news quickly. He was deep in meditation in one of the greatest libraries of Camel Eaters. Violence raged in his mind though. All around his blood streaked the skies and the seas boiled with men in them. Dying men and children tore at his skin. Women were whipped by demons and driven to produce soldiers for some distant war until their eventual deaths. An Keehan concentrated on this. His mind went blank for a moment shattering as he went wild. War coursed through him. Thousands of years of blood lust surged forwards in a matter of moments. He felt the need of his people to die in battle. He felt their bones crack under tanks. He felt bullets blow through him. He was the dying wind that tore the streets asunder. The rage was unending. The blood would be great. He found control once more. His body gripped in the throws of war. Covered in sweat and blood from where he slapped himself hard. His sword lay in his hands. Humming and swaying through the air. He sheathed the av'tlev (his sword) and felt the electric current that coursed through it extinguish. His personal aide entered the room after minutes of watching the blood frenzy. "My lord. I bring you interesting news. The Scroll Of Gahlan has been realized by the Order. They have decided to make copies. Rumor amongst the Bards is that every copy is different. We don't know which ones are true. They'll trick the clans into war."

An Keehan breathed again. Replacing the veils that covered his face An Keehan turned to the boy who had served him so faithfully. "Domovoi war has always been at our throats. Only those descended of Gahlan may start a Dynasty. And foreigners also carry his blood. You realize what this means? Any clan that adopts such an individual will rule for thousands of years. We must join the Order in deciding who is best suited for this rule." Domovoi simply nodded his head. Sweeping quickly towards the door to ready the House of An Keehan for duty.

She did not sleep well. The images of The Blind filled her mind. Images of his destruction..... Something caused her to awaken though. Staring upwards at a veiled face she knew who it was. An Keehan (The Blind) he'd come to her. The Matriarch shifted in the hospital like bed. Her eighty-year old body was much more graceful than it should have been. Her hair even possessed a hint of its former glory. The few red strands that remained among the maze of white. An Keehan kneeled to her. His av'tlev landed in her lap. He straightened his back and began.

"What you have done here Matriarch may very well doom the Dalcassians. Who I was once a member of. But should my former Sept not live up to the expectations set forth by Faoilleach Gahlan himself, through the work of Kellin Hannon no less, than they are not deserving of the Scrolls acknowledgement. I am here to act as Enforcer. To guard the most sacred and holy thing that we have. The Bloodline of Gahlan. You shall bless me with this task if you see fit."

"And if I do not?" She replied smoothly. Her mind had not been warped with age afterall.

"You may join the hero you have sought to protect the Bloodline of you entire life."

The Matriarch laughed her voice slipping into an old tune the An Keehan knew well. She was binding his service to the protection of the Scroll. The Blind One smiled and was gone in the next instant......

The clans were in an uproar. Each had received a copy of the Gahlan Heritage Scroll. Each one was different. They were all ready to spill blood to find out which one was correct. And the damndest thing was that every one stopped eighty years before now. Every clan was afraid of what would happen. One single shot could cause the whole of the powder keg to go.

taggy

OOC: Sorry y'all. GET INVOLVED!

bump

OOC: The following post contains slight sexual descriptions and coarse language. If you are offended by such then do not read the following post.

Markus Oleander felt his legs lift out from under him. Slamming hard onto the table he winced in pain only to smacked in the face by a cow tongue and punched in the stomach by two rather large men. The next part was what he liked. The whiskey, beer, and vodka fell over his face like rain. He gulped down all he could as someone got the idea to throw chips on him. Peanut butter fell on his chest and lemon juice squirted onto chin as someone forced it into his mouth. He'd bitten down and found that with a shot of vodka at the right time it was really quite good. Now here was the light at the end of the tunnel. First a dark haired woman grabbed him and forced her tongue down his throat. She'd eaten some salt for this and it stayed in his mouth. He was dazed for a moment before a pair of large brown breasts appeared above his head. They contained a large slice of lime which he slurped up before the tequilla was poored down his throat by both of the girls. He was rolled off the table and crawled away a happy man.

Markus Oleander staggered to his feet. He was finally a member of the Hedonistics. His long months of initiation were over and he was here! Markus fell in a ditch and found himself shaking at what he saw before him. A dead man lay in the ditch beside him. Markus tried to roll away but he was to drunk and just kind of cried at the sight before him. The man's head was half gone and ants crawled over it in waves. But something was jutting from the man's hands. A case covered in strange carvings that Markus had never seen in his life. On impulse he grabbed it and crawled away.

With it firmly tucked away in his pockets Markus headed back to the party. Most of all the Suck 'n Fuck Tent.

An Keehan watched with a look of confusion on his face. How could this self-pleasuring man give birth to a General? The Matriarch had charged him with preparing those who were to become important. He'd distributed the cases as she'd instructed. He barely had a faint inkling of what it was. But that inkling that he had did scare him greatly. Putting that much power into the hands of so many small people was dangerous. An Keehan, greatest of the Bards, turned and vanished into the forest. Leaving behind a very confused young man with a very powerful charge.

bump

OOC: Tag for interest.

Nah nah nah nah.

Mary Mac rushed through everything rather quickly. Preparations weren't that majorly important to her. She was afterall the best pilot the whole goddamned Hannon clan ever knew. She punched the fuel line one more time just to be sure and climbed in. She felt invincible in a plane. Checking her lines for a second or two she launched. Dragging this damn chunk of metal into the air always gave her a thrill that almost no man or woman could equal. Breathing for a moment she felt her soul detach from her mind and the mission came first. The Carnival of Monsters came into her view from up here. Stout reptilian and mammalian immitations of dinosaurs and men appeared before her. The Hannons wanted it wiped out before any sort of conflict came about. She was here to deliver it. The trainers looked up in puzzlement as the first fuel bomb dropped. The clearing was far from civilization and nobody knew that dozens of sentient creations were being killed off.

She flew back slowly. Dazed from what had happened. After dropping the first few bombs the wind had picked up to such massive speeds that most of the bombs were being thrown around like boats in a gale. She herself could barely keep control of the bomber as it was whipped around by the massive hurricane force that smashed into her for a few moments. She couldn't drop anything else. The landing gears had been twisted like a chicken's neck and the hatches were sealed shut by the force of the wind.

Nova Slim-Eyes looked towards the sky at what had just happened. He was small for a four year old but had a mind like a general even at this age. He watched the sky for a moment more as the tops of trees ripped back and were swung upward. He leaned against the Yeti like creature at his side. Scared out of his mind he still found the courage to try and calm them all down by singing softly in an ancient voice. He would be their heart if need be. They just needed to unite and find a clan. The creatures that were here: the Yetis, the Dinosaurs, the Antlions in scores. They were all perfect for war. Nova would lead them......

An Keehan was glad he could do this for the tiny general afore him. Born of Upper Xenian blood and the ancient seed of the O'Brien clan.....Nova was important to what would happen here. He was the greatest possibility for leading the armies of the Order of Gahlan. An Keehan silenced the wind and drifted back to the Matriarch.

bump y'all.

Park was reading a biography he had of Woodrow Wilson, and a family genealogy book on the plane. It was a 747, Xenizen National Airways, he had chosen to fly coach. The genealogy book passed the time....

He remebered how he had gotten it. His mother and father had owned it since they were children, the book had been passed down from Great-Grandma Park and Great-Grandpa Jimmy Wilson, a Scotsman who moved to UX before WWI. Grandma always said that the family would do something big. She noted that when Wilson was elected in 1912, Great-Grandpa said, "That's our man. I'm related to him."

Great-Grandpa then, to the day he died from smoking too much, told tales of the Wilson clan, which he was related to. He told tales of their religious zeal, how their devotion to God and Scotland was an example to follow. He told tales of old Scottish warriors, how they resisted the English incursions in the 1200's and in the Rising. Sure, there were Presbyterians, but it was God nonetheless. And, he told the younglings how Wilson came close to making world peace possible, until the ambitions of men stole his dream away.

Those tales had reached young Park Mung-Hyong. He was proud that, in the Korean Auxiliaries, which were full of people who played at being Scots, thanks to the arrival of some Black Watchmen, he really was one. Quarter anyway. He loved those stories, and he wanted to join his distant relative, Woodrow, in glory.

So when his boss, the Mod Gang boss Tom FitzHerbert-Kung, asked him to fly to Camel Eaters, having heard of the Gahlan Heritage Scroll, he couldn't pass this up. They were more Irish than Scots, but meh. He was among kindred.

But what got him was Tom's request. He treated the Scroll like it was a fancy object. Like another art piece to hang on his wall. Park chafed at that; he knew damn well that this meant something. So when he read his genealology book, he vowed:

"Coosin Woodrow, Great-grandpa Jimmy-i'll make ye prood ay me. yoo'll see. they hink they will hae th' scroll as anither treasure, but 'at damn sassenach will be in fur a load ay trooble," he thought. He closed the book, and drifted off to sleep.....

Tag

Gahlan Scrolls, huh? These could prove usefull.
General Homer picked up the phone. He waited for three minutes while Jordan's phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Jordan? This is Homer."
"Ah, yes, Homer, how are you my rebellious bastard of a friend?"
"Recovering from the stress. Just so you know, the Arcehers proved to be better than expected. We did a huge number of Fluffy."
"I saw. Now, what is it?"
"Do you remember Camel Eaters?"
"Camel Eaters...Weren't they part of TEOO?"
"Yes. Now, it seems there are these scrolls that-"
"No."
"What?"
"Don't try and get them, Homer. I don't want Green Sun getting its ass kicked and or eaten by a bunch of mutated cannibals."
"But-"
"No."
"Well, I'll get them somehow. You just wait."
"Alright. Just don't use our men."
Jordan hung up. Homer set the phone back on the reciever and slumped back into his chair. What to do, what to do...This chance was too great to pass up, but Green Sun couldn't go in there and just take them. He needed someone else. Someone who was tougher thank a Collosus tank What to do, what to do...
Homer sat back up. The Green Sun mercenaries! Just use the Urban Rangers to get the job done. They were cheap and had some of the best soldiers in the region. He quickly arranged for a representitive to infiltrate Camel Eaters and retrieve the scrolls. This would be fun, to say the least.
-------------
"Jason Johnson! Quit dickin' around and get your sorry hide down here!"
"Sir!"
Jason jumped down from the balcony-a 3 story fall-and approached his commander.
"What is it, sir? Do I have to get another kitten out of a tree in the park?"
"No, this time it's five. You can do that or be dropped in another nation filled with mutants that can take a mortar and still kick your ass. Now get your body armor on and get those damn cats."
"Sir-"
"We already have Hubert on the job."
"Hubert..."
"Yeah. Now load up as much stuff as you can, we want this job to get us more than a twenty Head."

On the plane men, women, and children were buzzing with news of so many copies of the Scroll having been seen. Then they noticed the asian......ish looking man who was talking to himself before drifting asleep. He was talking in Scots. A fiery brand ran through the crowd. Everyone was deep in thought for a moment before the small boy sitting next to him took the book from his hands. He handed it to his mother and father on the other side of the row and they looked it over. It made the rounds of the plane before being settled back into Park's hands.

It was covered in messages written about Wilson links to different clans and the geneaology of that whole area of Scotland in general. Phone numbers of good geneaologists were listed and everyone had a comment that they'd written down. Once blank pages had run out of space men and women had written on their own sheets and stuffed it into the book. All in all it was much thicker than it originally was. Even a few girls put their personal numbers in it. Though one message of such a variety stuck out the most.

Maggie Ogden
34-643-Sangre
"I'd like to see what's under that kilt."

The plane circled slowly above the airport before coming in for a landing.....

OOC: UX get on MSN if yae can. And GS TG me with what I should do now. A might bit confuzzled as to what or how I should respond. Oh shazzle. I just reread the UX post. Let's just pretend.....for the sake of Deus Ex Machina. That the plane was filled with lots of Camel Eaters on their way back from the great tourist spot known as UX.

On the plane men, women, and children were buzzing with news of so many copies of the Scroll having been seen. Then they noticed the asian......ish looking man who was talking to himself before drifting asleep. He was talking in Scots. A fiery brand ran through the crowd. Everyone was deep in thought for a moment before the small boy sitting next to him took the book from his hands. He handed it to his mother and father on the other side of the row and they looked it over. It made the rounds of the plane before being settled back into Park's hands.

It was covered in messages written about Wilson links to different clans and the geneaology of that whole area of Scotland in general. Phone numbers of good geneaologists were listed and everyone had a comment that they'd written down. Once blank pages had run out of space men and women had written on their own sheets and stuffed it into the book. All in all it was much thicker than it originally was. Even a few girls put their personal numbers in it. Though one message of such a variety stuck out the most.

Maggie Ogden
34-643-Sangre
"I'd like to see what's under that kilt."

The plane circled slowly above the airport before coming in for a landing.....

OOC: UX get on MSN if yae can. And GS TG me with what I should do now. A might bit confuzzled as to what or how I should respond. Oh shazzle. I just reread the UX post. Let's just pretend.....for the sake of Deus Ex Machina. That the plane was filled with lots of Camel Eaters on their way back from the great tourist spot known as UX.

OOC: Will do. We love you guys, anyway, so that is possible.

IC:

Park woke up, and said, "Looks loch eh'd better be gonnae."

He noticed the marks in his book. It had been siginificantly changed from when he had gone to sleep. Now, there were new pages, new markings-even a few suggestive messages from the womenfolk. It was much thicker indeed, and it had a more complete geneaology.

He thumbed through the book before stowing it away, and said, "Nice. these Camel Eaters sure ken their way aroond th' auld fowk cabre."

He then packed his bags, and got ready to get off. The plane landed, and soon, Park took his overhead bag, and proceeded to get off, after making sure he hadn't lost a thing.

Hubert felt the hard jerk as his parachute opened. He then felt the gentle sway as he landed on the Camel Eater's coastal plain. He probably wasn't too far from a farm or something. He ditched his parachute and silently lurked behind a very large rock. He looked around and saw he wazs near a prison or some otehr heavily gaurded building. He ran towards it and sneaked along its walls, being as silent as a ghost and just as visible. He peeked around a corner and continued. He spotted a road near a forest and made a break for the forest. He wasn't seen. He snickered as he got deeper into teh forest, but was stopped by a large group of Camel Eaters Soliders as soon as he did.
"Aw, nutbunnies!"

The airport was fairly simple here. Not that it wasn't massive. But to the naked eye it wasn't that high tech. People lifted massive amounts of luggage by hand and placed them into carts. Planes taxied onto lanes that looked way to short for them to take off. Not until they just lifted into the air and flew slowly forward did thing look different. Geneaology services were advertised on massive boards alongside beer, a billboard advertising the new CD Irametrics by The Giant of Adam, and of course sex services.

Gates with different colors were leading from disembark section of the airport. Yellow for Expected Arrival, Green for Native, and Red for Other. Park would've probably noticed the large neon yellow band that wrapped around the handle of his luggage.

An Keehan was in civilian clothes. Without his weapons. And if should a fight breakout he wouldn't be able to use his Bardic talents at all here. Still though he held up a sign that said in rather large black letters. PARK HYUNG MONG WILSON.....He really hoped that the guy got here soon. He was afterall rather uncomfortable in a big red T-shirt that said quite plainly on it. I will shoot you with my Erection.............

The airport was fairly simple here. Not that it wasn't massive. But to the naked eye it wasn't that high tech. People lifted massive amounts of luggage by hand and placed them into carts. Planes taxied onto lanes that looked way to short for them to take off. Not until they just lifted into the air and flew slowly forward did thing look different. Geneaology services were advertised on massive boards alongside beer, a billboard advertising the new CD Irametrics by The Giant of Adam, and of course sex services.

Gates with different colors were leading from disembark section of the airport. Yellow for Expected Arrival, Green for Native, and Red for Other. Park would've probably noticed the large neon yellow band that wrapped around the handle of his luggage.

An Keehan was in civilian clothes. Without his weapons. And if should a fight breakout he wouldn't be able to use his Bardic talents at all here. Still though he held up a sign that said in rather large black letters. PARK HYUNG MONG WILSON.....He really hoped that the guy got here soon. He was afterall rather uncomfortable in a big red T-shirt that said quite plainly on it. I will shoot you with my Erection.............

Park saw the man with the sign looking for him, and he walked up to him eagerly. He was not expecting any contacts, but this would prove interesting.

He said to the man politely, "Ah am Park Hyung Mang Wilson. Whit dae ye need ay me?"

Hubert felt the hard jerk as his parachute opened. He then felt the gentle sway as he landed on the Camel Eater's coastal plain. He probably wasn't too far from a farm or something. He ditched his parachute and silently lurked behind a very large rock. He looked around and saw he wazs near a prison or some otehr heavily gaurded building. He ran towards it and sneaked along its walls, being as silent as a ghost and just as visible. He peeked around a corner and continued. He spotted a road near a forest and made a break for the forest. He wasn't seen. He snickered as he got deeper into teh forest, but was stopped by a large group of Camel Eaters Soliders as soon as he did.
"Aw, nutbunnies!"
A rather heavy set man stepped forward and tentatively put his hand out to Hubert. He was large and black. At least six and a half feet and covered in a strange mix of muscle and fat. He was covered in battle scars and tattoos of his exploits in the world. He wore nothing but large green kilt. After letting his hand come to rest on Hubert's shoulder he asked slowly.

"Son, are you alright? We've got some extra food upstairs in the castle and would be happy to share it with you. After all when does a man just fall out of the sky around here?"

A smaller strangely colored boy stepped forward and said. "About every day actually dad. They usually just don't survive." His father hmmphed and then ushered Hubert in through a side gate. The first that greeted his eyes were rolling hills of green grass. They were dotted with large pockets of white whooly things that were probably sheep. The second thing he noticed was that he had come along one wall of a mostly rundown castle with only the North wall still standing. Huts were tucked against it. Even a few modest houses. Though large machine-gun posts stretched most of the way down the wall. The third thing that dominated the landscape was a long pole with a small black box on it. This was their only internet connection.....

They rushed down with a bowl of soup like substance and balanced it on a rock in front of him. Large chunks of meat dotted the corn filled broth.

Park saw the man with the sign looking for him, and he walked up to him eagerly. He was not expecting any contacts, but this would prove interesting.

He said to the man politely, "Ah am Park Hyung Mang Wilson. Whit dae ye need ay me?"
"I'm here to pick you up. Now come with me so I can show you to the car."

bump y'all

"I'm here to pick you up. Now come with me so I can show you to the car."

Park said, "Okay, i'll come wi' ye."

Park soon followed An Keehan to the car.....

"I'm alright. I didn't expect to be seen until daybreak."
Hubert looked down at the soup.
"I hope this isn't pork or human. I'm a Neo-Muslim."

"I'm alright. I didn't expect to be seen until daybreak."
Hubert looked down at the soup.
"I hope this isn't pork or human. I'm a Neo-Muslim."
"Pssh. We don't eat pork in this nation and human flesh is more ceremonial unless your a Sawney. No in fact boy it's crickets, fish, and chicken. May not sound great but it's pretty damn good. Most of my clan lives off of it."

He tossed the machinegun to his shoulder and spoke in a quick African dialect. The men dispersed and an older man dressed kind of like a priest stepped forward with a large basin of hot water. He gestured for Hubert to remove his shoes and socks so that he may wash his feet.

A jet, a rather old and decripit jet, pulled up to the terminal in what would prove to be one of Camel Eaters larger airports. On the side there is a picture, a faded picture, of a red circle and a jolly Goblin.
On arriving at the Terminal the Goblin passengers disembark in the usual mob. Goblins have this amazing ability to move with complete and total disorder. If a bunch of Goblins wore the same clothes and marched in perfect lockstep, they would still be a mob.
These particular Goblins are apparently attempting to look touristy. A few are wearing 'Hawaiian' shirts with polaroid cameras around their necks. One or two have widebrimmed straw hats with ragged edges.
Needless to say, this might work for a person of Oriental descent, but on a short green figure with a nose longer than the brim of the hat...well...its just odd.
One figure hasnt apparently bothered with this, and is wearing 'traditional' Goblin attire, namely a mix of leather and chain mail, with a small round iron helmet on top.
How this got past airport security is a mystry. Presumably money was involved, although often it is assumed that if a Goblin plans to do something violent, they wont need weapons.
The crowd makes its way noisily into the street. The 'normal' Goblin waits on the corner, staring around for the local equivalent of a person going in the right direction with a bit of space in the back.
Unfourtunatly the figure is englufed in a crowd of others. After significant grumbling the Goblin sets off down the street looking for something approximating a hotel.

"Right. Well just this was Mr. Wilson." An Keehan was being remarkably nice to Park as he led him through the street and out to his smallish black car. After opening the door and beckoning him inside they took off down the street. Massive signs stood all over the city. Strewn with Ogham, Chinese, and English lettering they shown like massive neon outposts against the heavily forested streets. It was like driving through a forest with thirty story buildings on both sides of you. With some of the trees reaching just as tall. Park would've noticed quite literally a mass of treehouses into which whole families were crowded. Jim's Cricket Supply dominated a whole tree and had people buzzing around it getting ready to buy some delicious nutritious crickets.

Then something else would've caught his eye. A great monument of a Camel Eaters soldier. His enemy fallen dead before him and chewing on the arm of another foe. An Keehan slowed the car long enough for Park to read the inscription. "In memorum of all Camel Eaters men and women who have died fighting for Freedom, Liberty, and Honor in Foreign Lands." The flag of CE dominated the monument with the flags of The Great Sixth Reich, Upper Xen, and The Former Celtic Republics of the ACS. An Keehan sped up and they soon came to a large library like building.

He got out and stepped to the other side and opened Park's door. "Well Seeker-of-the-Scrolls. We're home."

"Right. Well just this was Mr. Wilson." An Keehan was being remarkably nice to Park as he led him through the street and out to his smallish black car. After opening the door and beckoning him inside they took off down the street. Massive signs stood all over the city. Strewn with Ogham, Chinese, and English lettering they shown like massive neon outposts against the heavily forested streets. It was like driving through a forest with thirty story buildings on both sides of you. With some of the trees reaching just as tall. Park would've noticed quite literally a mass of treehouses into which whole families were crowded. Jim's Cricket Supply dominated a whole tree and had people buzzing around it getting ready to buy some delicious nutritious crickets.

Then something else would've caught his eye. A great monument of a Camel Eaters soldier. His enemy fallen dead before him and chewing on the arm of another foe. An Keehan slowed the car long enough for Park to read the inscription. "In memorum of all Camel Eaters men and women who have died fighting for Freedom, Liberty, and Honor in Foreign Lands." The flag of CE dominated the monument with the flags of The Great Sixth Reich, Upper Xen, and The Former Celtic Republics of the ACS. An Keehan sped up and they soon came to a large library like building.

He got out and stepped to the other side and opened Park's door. "Well Seeker-of-the-Scrolls. We're home."

Park looked at the monument, and said, "Quite a fittin' monument indeed..."

He then laughed and said: "I hae tae say....I min' stories ay a regiment ay crazed selic maneaters, tay toogh tae die. Mainly frae captured reds, fa aye hud drawers stained wi' guff, tay. Ye troaps must've hud an effect oan them. As fur me, Ah saw some camel eaters troops-i was part ay th' lat at oan 'at General Motors plant in Wuhan afair Ah was discharged fur injury."

He walked inside, and was amazed at the building. "Nice...."

He loved the interior; it was indeed quite ornate, and old....he ate it up.

An Keehan turned for a moment at the words that poured from the man's mouth. He smirked and laughed outloud before doubling over and coughing profusely.

"Co'ere boyo an' sae if yae ca' spak Aggis flu'ent. If yae ca' dat'd be gran' if yae ca'nt den dat'd be gran' tae."

"Of course then if you'd prefer me to speak proper English that'd be grand as well."

An Keehan walked up a massive case of stairs disappearing for a moment before reappearing at the top to another floor. He wasn't waiting for the man behind him to catch up.

An Keehan turned for a moment at the words that poured from the man's mouth. He smirked and laughed outloud before doubling over and coughing profusely.

"Co'ere boyo an' sae if yae ca' spak Aggis flu'ent. If yae ca' dat'd be gran' if yae ca'nt den dat'd be gran' tae."

"Of course then if you'd prefer me to speak proper English that'd be grand as well."

An Keehan walked up a massive case of stairs disappearing for a moment before reappearing at the top to another floor. He wasn't waiting for the man behind him to catch up.

Park followed him, running up the steps and saying in clear, clean English with a Scottish accent: "Oh, really. In that case, I'd better not befuddle you then with my Auxiliary speak."

He wondered where the man went. He seemed to be hurried, and it was kinda rude of him to just bolt off......

An Keehan found himself in a hallway of doors. There were dozens of them lining the corridor. He disappeared behind one quickly. Leaving Park completely out of it as to where he should go. All he saw at the end of the hall was a large phone like thing. It was covered with numbers and letters and sat rather awkwardly on the wall.........

A Pwnage Air G80 slowed gradually as it began its descent from the upper atmosphere. Spiraling overhead Birmingham International Airport, it landed with a strange ease for a plane with a 400 foot wingspan. Getting off the plane were a load of tourists, Camel Eaters citizens, business peoples and one Lien Duy Nien, of the Pwnage Vietcong, one of the most ruthless criminal organizations in the world.

The first thing that people noticed about Lien wasn't that she had supermodel good looks, but the huge BR-3 company support machine gun on her back, that was as long as her 5'3" height. Not only could Lien wield that thing, but she could shoot straight with it too.

Added to the BR-3 was a bottom mounted 10 shot 40mm semi-automatic grenade launcher that could accept GMG belts as well as standard drums.

People turned to stare at her as she walked through the terminal up to the security counter. If they wouldn't let the BR-3 past, she would have to blast her way through, which wouldn't be pleasant for the people in the airport....

The security guard just kept humming as she approached. He sipped his coffee and stepped forward with his hand up. He took out a long baton like thing and said quite boredly.

"Ma'am I'm going to need to scan that weapon of yours and then check it." He took out a ticket-stamper and punched the BR-3 with it rather quickly before waving the long baton wand like thing over it. It clicked and beeped and then the guard shrugged and moved back to his post. He waved Lien through into Miami.

The people in the airport were armed like an army. Swords and guns and rocket launchers were checked and scanned by officials.

There were no doors to the airport. Just long opening where people could just walk out onto the street. Massive police walkers (like those bipedal mechs from Star Wars) stalked the streets. A beep sounded as Lien walked past the checkpoint and then she was in Miami......

An Keehan found himself in a hallway of doors. There were dozens of them lining the corridor. He disappeared behind one quickly. Leaving Park completely out of it as to where he should go. All he saw at the end of the hall was a large phone like thing. It was covered with numbers and letters and sat rather awkwardly on the wall.........

Park then fretted, "Hmm...guess he was busy."

He then walked up to the phone like object, and picked up the reciever looking thing.....he decided to see if he could dial that girl's number.

He pulled out that book, and dialed 34-643-Sangre...he wondered what would happen now.

"Pssh. We don't eat pork in this nation and human flesh is more ceremonial unless your a Sawney. No in fact boy it's crickets, fish, and chicken. May not sound great but it's pretty damn good. Most of my clan lives off of it."

He tossed the machinegun to his shoulder and spoke in a quick African dialect. The men dispersed and an older man dressed kind of like a priest stepped forward with a large basin of hot water. He gestured for Hubert to remove his shoes and socks so that he may wash his feet.
Hubert did as he was told and washed his hands and feet, then started to eat the odd combination of meats and insects. To his surprise it was quite good. He sinished the bowl up fairly quickly. He wiped his face with a napkin and stood. He picked up the bowl and looked around.
"It was very good, thank you," Hubert said to the older priest, "Now where is teh dish cleaner and what can I do in return for your hospitality?"

The lone Goblin, whos name would proove to be (inevitably) Squee, grumbled a bit more as he trudged along the streets.
He was, of course, working for the BMG govornment. He was assigned to a 'general intelligence op', which meant that HQ had said "You, stuff is happening over there, go find out stuff about it."
At that point he had been givin a plane ticket, shoved out the door, and yelled at until he stopped looking puzzled and headed off toward the airport.
At THIS point Squee was looking for a box or tunnel or some kind of shelter. They apparently didnt have many unnocupied non-prostitute-type hotels here. Not that Squee objected to that sort of thing, but humans werent his type.
Squee sighed. Wondering what exactly he was supposed to be investigating.

"Welcome to Miami."

Lien cursed. She must have boarded the wrong flight.

Oh well, time to make the best of her stay here. Unfortunately, she had precious little information on the potential location of the scrolls.

She could thus sit in a 7 star hotel and watch the news, wasting the elders' money.

She walked up the most luxurious hotel in Miami and asked for the price of the Royal Suite.

The lone Goblin, whos name would proove to be (inevitably) Squee, grumbled a bit more as he trudged along the streets.
He was, of course, working for the BMG govornment. He was assigned to a 'general intelligence op', which meant that HQ had said "You, stuff is happening over there, go find out stuff about it."
At that point he had been givin a plane ticket, shoved out the door, and yelled at until he stopped looking puzzled and headed off toward the airport.
At THIS point Squee was looking for a box or tunnel or some kind of shelter. They apparently didnt have many unnocupied non-prostitute-type hotels here. Not that Squee objected to that sort of thing, but humans werent his type.
Squee sighed. Wondering what exactly he was supposed to be investigating.

Walking along rather sullenly a man kind of noticed the tiny green man walking around. He worked for An Keehan and was of the mind that his master need to know this was here. He walked up to the small guy and poked his face. "Yo, youz come wit me."

He picked Squee up and headed off to An Keehan's home, he left him there under the care of the cook.

"Welcome to Miami."

Lien cursed. She must have boarded the wrong flight.

Oh well, time to make the best of her stay here. Unfortunately, she had precious little information on the potential location of the scrolls.

She could thus sit in a 7 star hotel and watch the news, wasting the elders' money.

She walked up the most luxurious hotel in Miami and asked for the price of the Royal Suite.

She would of course be hard pressed to find anything like that. Camel Eaters mostly had Bed and Breakfast like joints for people to stay in. That's where she would've inevitably found herself. 127 Dagon Drive. The home of the local meat market man. He was given all the really horrbile criminals of this town and they were the meat of the meat market.

She would've been greeted at the gate by Maggie Ogden. Maggie would've led her into the house and set her up in a room for the night.

Park then fretted, "Hmm...guess he was busy."

He then walked up to the phone like object, and picked up the reciever looking thing.....he decided to see if he could dial that girl's number.

He pulled out that book, and dialed 34-643-Sangre...he wondered what would happen now.

A green light appeared for a moment as a low humming sound filled the ear piece. A gruff voice answered rather quickly. "This is Garter Ogden. We're not here right now. Leave a message with our password. If you're interested in human flesh then get back to me on that later."

Hubert did as he was told and washed his hands and feet, then started to eat the odd combination of meats and insects. To his surprise it was quite good. He sinished the bowl up fairly quickly. He wiped his face with a napkin and stood. He picked up the bowl and looked around.
"It was very good, thank you," Hubert said to the older priest, "Now where is teh dish cleaner and what can I do in return for your hospitality?"

"Well, were are you heading?" The priest man took the plate and handed it off to a smallish woman who would wash it.

A green light appeared for a moment as a low humming sound filled the ear piece. A gruff voice answered rather quickly. "This is Garter Ogden. We're not here right now. Leave a message with our password. If you're interested in human flesh then get back to me on that later."


Park thought, "Hmm...kinky....anyway, I'll leave a message."

He then, upon prompt, said the word "sangre" as the password, perhaps that was the reason why the last part of that number was a word. Different than the old area code-exchange number-number shtick in UX, for sure.

He then said, "Hi, this is Park Hong-Myung Wilson. I'm looking for Ogden, Maggie Ogden. She left me a message on the plane in my genealogy book....figured I'd call back. My cell is 213-324-4656, that's the Xenizen Hong Kong area code, so the country code for UX is 23. Okay, bye."

He then hung up, and proceeded to look around. He decided to open one of the doors, just because.....

Squee was moderatly puzzled at suddenly being transported across the city for no apparent reason, but decided against performing randonized surgery on the mans face for picking him up in such a patronizing manner.
The cook was a source of some frustration though, he clearly had NO idea of how to prepare proper fried beetles.

Park thought, "Hmm...kinky....anyway, I'll leave a message."

He then, upon prompt, said the word "sangre" as the password, perhaps that was the reason why the last part of that number was a word. Different than the old area code-exchange number-number shtick in UX, for sure.

He then said, "Hi, this is Park Hong-Myung Wilson. I'm looking for Ogden, Maggie Ogden. She left me a message on the plane in my genealogy book....figured I'd call back. My cell is 213-324-4656, that's the Xenizen Hong Kong area code, so the country code for UX is 23. Okay, bye."

He then hung up, and proceeded to look around. He decided to open one of the doors, just because.....
The first door he opened contained a massive library of sorts. Filled to the brim on the multitude of shelves were old dusted books of power and ancient stuff. The ceiling in this section of the house was actually about fifty or so feet high. A massive set of stairs led down to the bottom where it branched into a dirt floor. There was no floor right at door level. It ended several feet below. That's why the stairs were there. Over the walls were charts written in all sorts of ancient languages. Some of them seemingly strung together at random from many odd materials. One in paticular contained the look of yellowish human skin and papyrus......

Squee was moderatly puzzled at suddenly being transported across the city for no apparent reason, but decided against performing randonized surgery on the mans face for picking him up in such a patronizing manner.
The cook was a source of some frustration though, he clearly had NO idea of how to prepare proper fried beetles.
The cook stared down at the little bundle of insanity that had been dropped into his lap. The master of the house would surely want to know about this. Thinking for a moment on where An Keehan might be though he swung a pot around a bit to quickly and almost struck Squee in the face. Once again she pondered before it him like lightning. "Go wee one to the stairs and make your way across their barren wodden (he actually said wodden) face. Hike up them and yae'll find yourself in a directional corridor facing east. Also known as a hall. Go down and seek any door that you so choose. They all lead to the library. And that is where you shall find An Keehan."

He turned abruptly and set off towards some dark recess of the house. Singing some old drunken songs about a sailor of equal marinated state...

Still puzzeled, Squee set off toward the library, hoping that possibly, just possibly, something MIGHT make sense in this insane country.
He picked up a fly, two moths and a spider of some sort on the way as a snack. They werent as good raw, and the spider bit is finger, but it was better than nothing.

Still puzzled, Squee set off toward the library, hoping that possibly, just possibly, something MIGHT make sense in this insane country.
He picked up a fly, two moths and a spider of some sort on the way as a snack. They werent as good raw, and the spider bit is finger, but it was better than nothing.
An incredibly loud and incredibly close sound greeted his ears. A medium sized woman went flying forth from one of the many doors. She was covered in soot and smelled like an explosion. Smoke was coming from her hair and jacket and her shoes were slightly melted. Standing up her nose was at an odd angle which she quickly fixed by straightening it out with her bare hands. A racking cough came from her and the door that she came from had been knocked off its hinges. She saw the goblin and grimaced for a moment.

"I'm so sorry dear! How impolite of me to have not introduced myself. My name's Mary Ward. I'm the nurse of the House of An Keehan. How're yae?"

She extended her hand and smiled. Her head crowned with frying hair and a strange melted grease smell came from her. But all in all she looked rather pretty....

Squee, who had no sense of human bueaty, shook her hand.
Most likely this madwoman was some sort of alchemist. Squee had had lots of experience with alchemists. They were generaly harmless as long as they werent thinking.
"Ise Squee, I have no idea why Im 'ere, some guy jus kinna pick'd me up off da street and dumped me in da kitchen. Den da cook tried ta kill me wi' a frying pan, and told me ta go to da librer-y."

"OH! I just came from the library! Come with me I'll take you to it!" She grabbed his arm and lifted him quite easily and dragged him off through the blown apart door. Jumping down ten feet she threw him across the room into a stack of papers and scrolls and books. She hopped back up and closed the door. Kind of. After all it was off its hinges. She gestured around to Squee revealing the massive unending expanse of the library. Stretching on for miles and fifty feet up and down it was massive. All of it accumulated over the millenia by the An Keehans of old. She laughed wildly and dragged Squee off to her workstation. A scroll stood there. It was rather large and rather old. Fitted from all sorts of skins it was covered in names and dates and births.

She smiled and touched it reverently. Taking care not to scratch any part of it she sat down at her workstation and showed him the large amount of books. Working absentmindedly she began to talk. "You see I have to copy down all of the scroll. I also have to come up with good family lines that will turn this world on its year. You see I'm making sure that every fake copy is going to really mess with the status quo."

She started cackling madly and danced for a moment in her chair.....

The first door he opened contained a massive library of sorts. Filled to the brim on the multitude of shelves were old dusted books of power and ancient stuff. The ceiling in this section of the house was actually about fifty or so feet high. A massive set of stairs led down to the bottom where it branched into a dirt floor. There was no floor right at door level. It ended several feet below. That's why the stairs were there. Over the walls were charts written in all sorts of ancient languages. Some of them seemingly strung together at random from many odd materials. One in paticular contained the look of yellowish human skin and papyrus......


Park was intrigued by the human skin book. He usually saw that stuff as the product of horror flicks like Evil Dead, a film series which he loved, but he knew wasn't real, until now.

He picked up the book, prayed to God that nothing quite so horrifying as in Evil Dead would happen to him, and opened the book up, knowing not to read anything remotely freaky out loud.

Park was intrigued by the human skin book. He usually saw that stuff as the product of horror flicks like Evil Dead, a film series which he loved, but he knew wasn't real, until now.

He picked up the book, prayed to God that nothing quite so horrifying as in Evil Dead would happen to him, and opened the book up, knowing not to read anything remotely freaky out loud.
The first sentence of the book read as such.

So you want to eat a human?

What followed was a long string of calculations and small time gibberish on a massive scale. It seems the author just put down whatever he was thinking at the moment. What followed were long and rather detailed explanations on cannibalism, tattoo meanings, and something about crossbreeding humans with cows.

Then a picture of a dancing lepechraun surrounded by dead children and some rain falling upwards toward the sky came on the next page.

Then a very complete desciption of how to train Antlions with a cattle prod and some sugar comsumed a good twenty pages.

After that was alot of excessive cursing of the British Government, some random pictures of a pornographic nature, and a map of the city of Wuhan.

Then it just fell into complete disarray with parts in Scots, Egyptian, and Latin. Though the author seemed to like to quote the book 1984......Then the book ended. With twenty blank pages after that....

The first sentence of the book read as such.

So you want to eat a human?

What followed was a long string of calculations and small time gibberish on a massive scale. It seems the author just put down whatever he was thinking at the moment. What followed were long and rather detailed explanations on cannibalism, tattoo meanings, and something about crossbreeding humans with cows.

Then a picture of a dancing lepechraun surrounded by dead children and some rain falling upwards toward the sky came on the next page.

Then a very complete desciption of how to train Antlions with a cattle prod and some sugar comsumed a good twenty pages.

After that was alot of excessive cursing of the British Government, some random pictures of a pornographic nature, and a map of the city of Wuhan.

Then it just fell into complete disarray with parts in Scots, Egyptian, and Latin. Though the author seemed to like to quote the book 1984......Then the book ended. With twenty blank pages after that....

Park looked at the book in a funny way and said, "Okay......wow, those guys they sent to Wuhan were maneaters. Looks like I better block my ass, and try to play nice with the locals."

He then flipped back to the porn. He then said, "Hmm....the porn's nice, though."

He then read up on the Antlions, and put the book back, not before taking notes on the antlions.

Park looked at the book in a funny way and said, "Okay......wow, those guys they sent to Wuhan were maneaters. Looks like I better block my ass, and try to play nice with the locals."

He then flipped back to the porn. He then said, "Hmm....the porn's nice, though."

He then read up on the Antlions, and put the book back, not before taking notes on the antlions.
As has happened many times before in history. Right when someone felt their calmest.....something blows up. Out of the raging sands of time a man stepped behind Park.

Tall, heavy set, and barbaric in tongue he screamed before swinging the blunt side of his axe at Park's head......

As has happened many times before in history. Right when someone felt their calmest.....something blows up. Out of the raging sands of time a man stepped behind Park.

Tall, heavy set, and barbaric in tongue he screamed before swinging the blunt side of his axe at Park's head......

Park ducked and rolled, screaming "Holy shit!" He didn't see that coming, but he tried to react anyway-intense martial arts training will do that.

He got up, and then looked for some kind of weapon to use. He picked up a book, and threw it at the man. He then began rummaging through his bags, and found his traditional Korean Sword...

..Good thing he had his license.

OOC: If the Sword part is bad, I can cut it out.

Park ducked and rolled, screaming "Holy shit!" He didn't see that coming, but he tried to react anyway-intense martial arts training will do that.

He got up, and then looked for some kind of weapon to use. He picked up a book, and threw it at the man. He then began rummaging through his bags, and found his traditional Korean Sword...

..Good thing he had his license.

OOC: If the Sword part is bad, I can cut it out.
OOC: Is good.

He approached in a dream like state. His eyes glazed over with rage. Battle-scent washed over him as he felt the toxin flow through his veins. The book hit him square in the chest. It collapsed to the floor and flew open to a page. When he stepped on it for a moment he froze. Then became ink and fell back into the book of which he had come.

Park saw the name on the book that he'd thrown as it magically closed itself. The Heros of Our Past: The Tale of Ferrivn Gahlan the Mad

"Sometimes with us. The books really do come to life. As you've encountered." The voice echoed from all around as An Keehan appeared from the close shadows and picked up the book. "This book for instance chronicles the life of the first and the last Half-Gahlan Half-Sawney Prince of Birmingham. Ferrivn the Mad. Good thing he was returned to the book. You would not have survived the encounter. On a lighter note I do believe that you've discovered the library." With that he came with a grand gesturing motion showing off the massive room filled with books and scrolls and maps and all sorts of experimental objects that Park didn't seem to notice when he first came in.......

"OH! I just came from the library! Come with me I'll take you to it!" She grabbed his arm and lifted him quite easily and dragged him off through the blown apart door. Jumping down ten feet she threw him across the room into a stack of papers and scrolls and books. She hopped back up and closed the door. Kind of. After all it was off its hinges. She gestured around to Squee revealing the massive unending expanse of the library. Stretching on for miles and fifty feet up and down it was massive. All of it accumulated over the millenia by the An Keehans of old. She laughed wildly and dragged Squee off to her workstation. A scroll stood there. It was rather large and rather old. Fitted from all sorts of skins it was covered in names and dates and births.

She smiled and touched it reverently. Taking care not to scratch any part of it she sat down at her workstation and showed him the large amount of books. Working absentmindedly she began to talk. "You see I have to copy down all of the scroll. I also have to come up with good family lines that will turn this world on its year. You see I'm making sure that every fake copy is going to really mess with the status quo."

She started cackling madly and danced for a moment in her chair.....
A mildly concussed Squee merely nodded, turned around, and began to walk off, a few feet later he collapsed into an unconcious heap when, after bumping into a bookshelf, he was hit on the head by a copy of Goblinology.

A mildly concussed Squee merely nodded, turned around, and began to walk off, a few feet later he collapsed into an unconcious heap when, after bumping into a bookshelf, he was hit on the head by a copy of Goblinology.
Squee awoke to a room that smelled faintly of toffey.....The room was rather homely though. He rested on a bed covered in heaped up blankets and furs. A thick, rich, and rather oniony stew sat in a bowl next to him with some cheese and flat bread.

He also found that he was completely naked and an outfit in traditional Camel Eaters dress (mail and light furs with a kilt) lay next to his head. Something moved around quickly in the room for a moment before a massive St. Bernard appeard at the foot of the bed. Apparently it was asleep as well. And the bones of what looked to be a rather large chicken rested next to its stomach......

OOC: Is good.

He approached in a dream like state. His eyes glazed over with rage. Battle-scent washed over him as he felt the toxin flow through his veins. The book hit him square in the chest. It collapsed to the floor and flew open to a page. When he stepped on it for a moment he froze. Then became ink and fell back into the book of which he had come.

Park saw the name on the book that he'd thrown as it magically closed itself. The Heros of Our Past: The Tale of Ferrivn Gahlan the Mad

"Sometimes with us. The books really do come to life. As you've encountered." The voice echoed from all around as An Keehan appeared from the close shadows and picked up the book. "This book for instance chronicles the life of the first and the last Half-Gahlan Half-Sawney Prince of Birmingham. Ferrivn the Mad. Good thing he was returned to the book. You would not have survived the encounter. On a lighter note I do believe that you've discovered the library." With that he came with a grand gesturing motion showing off the massive room filled with books and scrolls and maps and all sorts of experimental objects that Park didn't seem to notice when he first came in.......

Park said, "An interesting library. Back home, this sort of magic is consigned to kung fu flicks and animes. Kinda freaky, but it proves those bedtiem stories had some truth."

He walked into the room with the experimental objects and scrolls. He wandered around a bit, and eventually decided to pick up one of the scrolls, just to see what was up. He was a bit weary, especially after that little encounter with Ferrivn the Mad. But, he was still willing to see what was up.

Park said, "An interesting library. Back home, this sort of magic is consigned to kung fu flicks and animes. Kinda freaky, but it proves those bedtiem stories had some truth."

He walked into the room with the experimental objects and scrolls. He wandered around a bit, and eventually decided to pick up one of the scrolls, just to see what was up. He was a bit weary, especially after that little encounter with Ferrivn the Mad. But, he was still willing to see what was up.
What he found was the lyrics to a song by The Hives.

Do what I want cause I can and if I don't
because I wanna be ignored by the stiff and the bored
because I'm gonna.
Spit and retrieve cause I give and receive
because I wanna gonna get through your head what the mystery man said
because I'm gonna.
Hate to say I told you so.
I do believe I told you so.
Now it's all out and you knew cause I wanted to.
Turn my back on the rot that's been planning the plot - because I'm gonna.
No need for me to wait - because I wanna.
No need two, three and too late - because I'm gonna.
Hate to say I told you so.
I do believe I told you so.
Do what I please gonna spread the disease
because I wanna gonna call all the shots for the "No"s and the "Not"s
because I wanna.
Ask me once I'll answer twice cause what I know I'll tell
because I wanna.
Sound device and lots of ice I'll spell my name out loud
because I wanna, oh yeah?

Under that was a full explanation of the Sawneys mating habits and following that. Something very strange....

was just seventeen, when I made the AHL
I couldn't skate in junior, but my fists rang like a bell.
I'll never win a title, and I'll never win the cup,
But when it comes to ladies, I've had the best of luck.

My first one was a sly one, hanging round the rink,
But they sent me off to Cornwall, as fast as you could blink,
In Moose Jaw I was right in love, the daughter of the coach -
He traded me for nothing, didn't take to my approach.

So good-bye, fare thee well,
There's no time for delay,
You'll see me at the face-off, or catch the play-by-play
So good-bye, fare thee well,
I'm glad you shared my bed,
But never trust a fellow with a helmet on his head.

Chantal was from Moncton, elle a jouer avec moi.
A tongue as sharp as razors, but she had a fancy car.
Her husband was a bruiser, played senior in Quebec,
If he'd had the rights of it, it would have been my neck.

Nancy couldn't watch me fight, she'd always be in tears,
Waving from the bleachers, and screaming in my ears,
Dee I should have married, and we had a dandy fling,
But I had a one way contract, blew the money for the ring.

I should have sent a letter, and it would have been polite,
But I'm cleaning out my locker, and time is getting tight.
I'm calling from the station, perhaps another day,
Cause they're calling up a rookie, and they're trading me away.

An Keehan laughed when he saw this. "Tricked by the look of age where you? I actually wrote these yesterday to be truthful. Amazing songs. To be loved when heard my the ears of men. Anyways stay as long as you like. Investigate it all. That is after all what we are here for. All of us......"

He drifted off for a moment before disappearing back into the shadows. Leaving Park with an overabundance of reading material to look at........

What he found was the lyrics to a song by The Hives.

Do what I want cause I can and if I don't
because I wanna be ignored by the stiff and the bored
because I'm gonna.
Spit and retrieve cause I give and receive
because I wanna gonna get through your head what the mystery man said
because I'm gonna.
Hate to say I told you so.
I do believe I told you so.
Now it's all out and you knew cause I wanted to.
Turn my back on the rot that's been planning the plot - because I'm gonna.
No need for me to wait - because I wanna.
No need two, three and too late - because I'm gonna.
Hate to say I told you so.
I do believe I told you so.
Do what I please gonna spread the disease
because I wanna gonna call all the shots for the "No"s and the "Not"s
because I wanna.
Ask me once I'll answer twice cause what I know I'll tell
because I wanna.
Sound device and lots of ice I'll spell my name out loud
because I wanna, oh yeah?

Under that was a full explanation of the Sawneys mating habits and following that. Something very strange....

was just seventeen, when I made the AHL
I couldn't skate in junior, but my fists rang like a bell.
I'll never win a title, and I'll never win the cup,
But when it comes to ladies, I've had the best of luck.

My first one was a sly one, hanging round the rink,
But they sent me off to Cornwall, as fast as you could blink,
In Moose Jaw I was right in love, the daughter of the coach -
He traded me for nothing, didn't take to my approach.

So good-bye, fare thee well,
There's no time for delay,
You'll see me at the face-off, or catch the play-by-play
So good-bye, fare thee well,
I'm glad you shared my bed,
But never trust a fellow with a helmet on his head.

Chantal was from Moncton, elle a jouer avec moi.
A tongue as sharp as razors, but she had a fancy car.
Her husband was a bruiser, played senior in Quebec,
If he'd had the rights of it, it would have been my neck.

Nancy couldn't watch me fight, she'd always be in tears,
Waving from the bleachers, and screaming in my ears,
Dee I should have married, and we had a dandy fling,
But I had a one way contract, blew the money for the ring.

I should have sent a letter, and it would have been polite,
But I'm cleaning out my locker, and time is getting tight.
I'm calling from the station, perhaps another day,
Cause they're calling up a rookie, and they're trading me away.

An Keehan laughed when he saw this. "Tricked by the look of age where you? I actually wrote these yesterday to be truthful. Amazing songs. To be loved when heard my the ears of men. Anyways stay as long as you like. Investigate it all. That is after all what we are here for. All of us......"

He drifted off for a moment before disappearing back into the shadows. Leaving Park with an overabundance of reading material to look at........

Park rolled up the scroll. He found the songs quite odd, but yet they had a sort of odd beauty with them.

He put it back, and wondered where to go next. There was almost too much here to read, and he didn't have enough time to read all this stuff. He decided to start with the machines. He picked one up, and wondered what would it do....

Park rolled up the scroll. He found the songs quite odd, but yet they had a sort of odd beauty with them.

He put it back, and wondered where to go next. There was almost too much here to read, and he didn't have enough time to read all this stuff. He decided to start with the machines. He picked one up, and wondered what would it do....
It whirred to life for a moment. Spinning almost uncontrollably a blue figure stood there. "This is Sgt. Jinhai O'Brien of the Black Lung Squad. Password Do Virgins Taste Better? Authenicification code accepted. This is my last will and testament. You see I am not long for this world. Sparky and I have been hunting zombies in Wuhan after the Xenian Civil War. What me and the others of this squad found today was devastating. Luckily I was ensealed in the Lassiter-Proto-Exoskeleton Combat System. The other weren't so lucky. Raging toxin filled the air as we took on the antlions. Usually we would've deployed the normal mist. Air-filled with calming hormones that usually work on antlions. These bastards were immune. Just like Sparky is actually. Except they don't have an AI dumped into their brain. They slaughtered anyone that didn't have the combat experience. Half of us went down fast while the other tried to shake it off. They were viscious. I used to spend time training antlions for the squad to use. They weren't like the normal ones I'd seen. Single minded. Determined. Smarter. Faster. Stronger. They came up behind us and I managed to get the foils up before they could tear me and Sparky to pieces. They've been following us ever since. Right now they're waiting outside. Bastards are just waiting for me and Sparky to come out and die. With that I leave you. Whoever you are to see how my last words."

The blue image flickered as the man gestured and a rather large Guardian Antlion appeared at his side. It nuzzled against him tenderly before the man put on a strange white colored exoskeleton. He picked up a gun that looked like it should've snapped his arms off and he set for the door. Sparky.....the antlion followed. Then the image died.......

It whirred to life for a moment. Spinning almost uncontrollably a blue figure stood there. "This is Sgt. Jinhai O'Brien of the Black Lung Squad. Password Do Virgins Taste Better? Authenicification code accepted. This is my last will and testament. You see I am not long for this world. Sparky and I have been hunting zombies in Wuhan after the Xenian Civil War. What me and the others of this squad found today was devastating. Luckily I was ensealed in the Lassiter-Proto-Exoskeleton Combat System. The other weren't so lucky. Raging toxin filled the air as we took on the antlions. Usually we would've deployed the normal mist. Air-filled with calming hormones that usually work on antlions. These bastards were immune. Just like Sparky is actually. Except they don't have an AI dumped into their brain. They slaughtered anyone that didn't have the combat experience. Half of us went down fast while the other tried to shake it off. They were viscious. I used to spend time training antlions for the squad to use. They weren't like the normal ones I'd seen. Single minded. Determined. Smarter. Faster. Stronger. They came up behind us and I managed to get the foils up before they could tear me and Sparky to pieces. They've been following us ever since. Right now they're waiting outside. Bastards are just waiting for me and Sparky to come out and die. With that I leave you. Whoever you are to see how my last words."

The blue image flickered as the man gestured and a rather large Guardian Antlion appeared at his side. It nuzzled against him tenderly before the man put on a strange white colored exoskeleton. He picked up a gun that looked like it should've snapped his arms off and he set for the door. Sparky.....the antlion followed. Then the image died.......

Park watched this, and could only feel some sympathy. He had lost a comrade to the Xenofauna that tended to bloom in grimy cities. Especially with war about. He lost that friend to a headcrab zombie in Kyoto, as the Reds turned the rockets on the Rebels inside.

God....he shuddered, and put it down. He remebered what he was here for-to find the Gahlan scroll. Or something like that. So he decided to look about the scrolls again. He picked one out, and unfurled it.

Park watched this, and could only feel some sympathy. He had lost a comrade to the Xenofauna that tended to bloom in grimy cities. Especially with war about. He lost that friend to a headcrab zombie in Kyoto, as the Reds turned the rockets on the Rebels inside.

God....he shuddered, and put it down. He remebered what he was here for-to find the Gahlan scroll. Or something like that. So he decided to look about the scrolls again. He picked one out, and unfurled it.
The scroll he chose was massive about thirty feet long and ancient. It flowed with flowery symbols and written in a language he couldn't really recognize. At the bottom of scroll was an insignia in large black block lettering. X-2413 was the code it presented. There was a large white ATM looking thing with a large projector on it and a seat in front. What else was there was a rather normal looking man pulling a disc out of it that he stuffed into his coat and then saw Park with the scroll in his hands.

"Oh hey! You must be new here. Good bit of literature you chose there. Just make sure to put it back where you found it. The Goidelicists that come through here always like to see that one because of the pre-Lindisfarne references to Northmen. Anyways if you can't read the language just punch it up on here and the tranlated text'll come up on the screen. Plus you can just get a nice little disc to take with you and read for your own leisure. Anyways if you need any help there's a workstation every half-mile or so. BYE!"

The man took off running in the other direction leaving Park all alone in a very massive library........

Park then looked at the scroll once again, and decided to get it translated. He sauntered up to the machine, punched the code on the scroll in, and sat down in the chair.

He was feelign kinda freaked right now, yet all of the sights and sounds of the room mixed with an upwelling curiosity to keep going. After all, he did know Tae Kwon Do, so he'd probably survive another freaky encounter. Or would he?

"Probably not wise to consider that now.....just stare at the piccy," he thought.

Park then looked at the scroll once again, and decided to get it translated. He sauntered up to the machine, punched the code on the scroll in, and sat down in the chair.

He was feelign kinda freaked right now, yet all of the sights and sounds of the room mixed with an upwelling curiosity to keep going. After all, he did know Tae Kwon Do, so he'd probably survive another freaky encounter. Or would he?

"Probably not wise to consider that now.....just stare at the piccy," he thought.
When Faoilleach Gahlan left this Earth he had fourteen sons. Thirty-eight daughters. And close to twenty wives. This man had lead us from the great desert to the wind swept shores of a land where ice lies in the bones of men. This is the history of our first engagement with the Northmen. Lying to the west of the great Yellow River they had magics that we had not seen. Faoilleach Gahlan dealt one great blow after the other to their reliance on sorcery. The Northmen spoke in strange yelling tones and were able to call dragons from the earth down onto us like the multitude hosts of flies to a corpse. We fought back best we could with our bows. They came in disorganized lines of men. Heavily armed they were slow. We cut them like chafe from the whey. One day Faoilleach descended upon there lines with an army of giants. These men of the Yellow River could not hold their ground against this assault by the Nor Se Giants. Faoilleach led each of these massive men against the Northmen. The Northmen were frightened and fled from the wild-haired men like pups flee their father. Then the Giants settled in their land for a time. They ate the small flat-eyed Northmen of the Yellow River for sustenance.

Under this was the notes of a man who'd investigated this scroll closely for quite some time.

"Even though the rest of the tale goes on to mention many, many things what we are seeing here is a rather good description of possible skirmishes with ancient Chinese warriors. However we do not know exactly what time period this date was recorded in and their is nothing in known Chinese history that mention invading hordes of giants and Celtic men. The giants themselves were probably recruits from Norse tribes. Not the Norse men mind you. But the actual giants of their myths. Faoilleach had a habit of bringing the past alive so easily with any culture that although seemingly outlandish this is the closest estimate we have. This scroll will probably never be solved. But it does provide plent of questions."

When Faoilleach Gahlan left this Earth he had fourteen sons. Thirty-eight daughters. And close to twenty wives. This man had lead us from the great desert to the wind swept shores of a land where ice lies in the bones of men. This is the history of our first engagement with the Northmen. Lying to the west of the great Yellow River they had magics that we had not seen. Faoilleach Gahlan dealt one great blow after the other to their reliance on sorcery. The Northmen spoke in strange yelling tones and were able to call dragons from the earth down onto us like the multitude hosts of flies to a corpse. We fought back best we could with our bows. They came in disorganized lines of men. Heavily armed they were slow. We cut them like chafe from the whey. One day Faoilleach descended upon there lines with an army of giants. These men of the Yellow River could not hold their ground against this assault by the Nor Se Giants. Faoilleach led each of these massive men against the Northmen. The Northmen were frightened and fled from the wild-haired men like pups flee their father. Then the Giants settled in their land for a time. They ate the small flat-eyed Northmen of the Yellow River for sustenance.

Under this was the notes of a man who'd investigated this scroll closely for quite some time.

"Even though the rest of the tale goes on to mention many, many things what we are seeing here is a rather good description of possible skirmishes with ancient Chinese warriors. However we do not know exactly what time period this date was recorded in and their is nothing in known Chinese history that mention invading hordes of giants and Celtic men. The giants themselves were probably recruits from Norse tribes. Not the Norse men mind you. But the actual giants of their myths. Faoilleach had a habit of bringing the past alive so easily with any culture that although seemingly outlandish this is the closest estimate we have. This scroll will probably never be solved. But it does provide plent of questions."

Park said, "Gnarly....."

He looked around for the disk the man said was free, and had the translated copy. Why pass up a freebie?

So, he looked at the little machine, and found the option to make the disk copy. He activated it, and a few moments later, he picked it up, smiling. This stuff might prove useful later.

He put the scroll back, and looked around. He found another one, his curiosity now on overdrive, and rolled it out.

Park said, "Gnarly....."

He looked around for the disk the man said was free, and had the translated copy. Why pass up a freebie?

So, he looked at the little machine, and found the option to make the disk copy. He activated it, and a few moments later, he picked it up, smiling. This stuff might prove useful later.

He put the scroll back, and looked around. He found another one, his curiosity now on overdrive, and rolled it out.
This scroll described a demonic spirit given human flesh. There was a full length portrait of the creature. Which looked like a man. But another picture showed its insides. The heart was on the other side and the veins were much larger. The lungs had formed into one large organ which nestled against the heart. The words on the scroll where in Greek. Off to the side though was a small image of a cross shining through the clouds of heaven with a dagger coming forth from it. It looked alot like a sword actually.

At the bottom was a small signature. Alexei Mormo. The scroll ended there.

This scroll described a demonic spirit given human flesh. There was a full length portrait of the creature. Which looked like a man. But another picture showed its insides. The heart was on the other side and the veins were much larger. The lungs had formed into one large organ which nestled against the heart. The words on the scroll where in Greek. Off to the side though was a small image of a cross shining through the clouds of heaven with a dagger coming forth from it. It looked alot like a sword actually.

At the bottom was a small signature. Alexei Mormo. The scroll ended there.

Park wrote down the name, saving it for later. Hopefully, it would make some sense later.

He was hungry, having not eaten anything since he got here. So, he decided to pack up, and wandered around, looking for somebody that could help him. Hopefully, he'd find somebody who would lead him to some regular food.....

Squee awoke to a room that smelled faintly of toffey.....The room was rather homely though. He rested on a bed covered in heaped up blankets and furs. A thick, rich, and rather oniony stew sat in a bowl next to him with some cheese and flat bread.

He also found that he was completely naked and an outfit in traditional Camel Eaters dress (mail and light furs with a kilt) lay next to his head. Something moved around quickly in the room for a moment before a massive St. Bernard appeard at the foot of the bed. Apparently it was asleep as well. And the bones of what looked to be a rather large chicken rested next to its stomach......
Squee sighed again
This was turning into a long night. He ignored the stew, considering that onions were a sort of natural X-lax for goblins. He chewed on the bread a bit, then got dressed (quietly) and started to look around for his weapons before giving up and staring at the wall a bit.

Park wrote down the name, saving it for later. Hopefully, it would make some sense later.

He was hungry, having not eaten anything since he got here. So, he decided to pack up, and wandered around, looking for somebody that could help him. Hopefully, he'd find somebody who would lead him to some regular food.....
"There is no man that ever ate, no man that was ever born, no joyous son of king or queen for whose sake I would do you harm."

The echo sounded from a little down the hall. Following this was another echo.

"Cuchulainn before he killed his foster-brother Ferdia. Now let's see if you can grasp this one my friend. The Son of Nes, battle-proud, drinks you say, the choicest mead. Choiser still -a brimming sea- which I have taken frequently."

A knowing groan and then an echo followed that.

"You love to quote tragedies to much. Derdriu lamenting the death of Noisiu whom she had escaped with too the forest instead of marrying the King of Ulster whom to she was promised."

"Well you couldn't think of a stumper for me. So shut up and let's eat some of this nice chicken that you've been cooking for three hours. Hmm. Where did you store that wine to ferment again? Was it among the comedies of the Greek texts?"

"Comedies."

A man came running towards Park. He noticed the new looking man and smiled. Bowing for a moment he went off and grabbed a scroll. Pulling it down he unfurled it to reveal a large bottle of dark red liquid. Glancing at Park once more he said.

"You want some chicken? We've been frying it up some extra to give to the dogs that roam here but there should be enough for you."

Squee sighed again
This was turning into a long night. He ignored the stew, considering that onions were a sort of natural X-lax for goblins. He chewed on the bread a bit, then got dressed (quietly) and started to look around for his weapons before giving up and staring at the wall a bit.
The dog raised its head and glanced at the goblin. He nosed Squee for a moment and then licked the back of his head before rolling over to reveal the weaponry that he'd been laying on as he slept. He promptly went back to sleep...

The dog raised its head and glanced at the goblin. He nosed Squee for a moment and then licked the back of his head before rolling over to reveal the weaponry that he'd been laying on as he slept. He promptly went back to sleep...
Squee picked up his axe and sighed. Dog hair everywhere. The midget flintlock he always kept on him was clogged with fur as well.
He grumbled a bit, then restored the assorted bladed objects to their accustomed places about his person and walked out the door into what appeared to be a long hallway of doors.
Why me?, Squee thought.
He set off to the right, looking for somewhere to go.

Squee picked up his axe and sighed. Dog hair everywhere. The midget flintlock he always kept on him was clogged with fur as well.
He grumbled a bit, then restored the assorted bladed objects to their accustomed places about his person and walked out the door into what appeared to be a long hallway of doors.
Why me?, Squee thought.
He set off to the right, looking for somewhere to go.
BOOM! That's what the sound would've been had anything interesting happened to him. Invariably he found himself in a nice short hall with doors all tightly closed. A large green sign hung from the entrance to the hallway. Sleep Here it read. A pleasant enough man passed by on the way to his room. The dog followed him down the hall. It stayed close at all times as they went down. A friendly looking help desk was positioned right there in front of him. A friendly looking short green female goblin-esque thing raised an eyebrow at him and quirked her head.

"Ello hoir oo?"

"There is no man that ever ate, no man that was ever born, no joyous son of king or queen for whose sake I would do you harm."

The echo sounded from a little down the hall. Following this was another echo.

"Cuchulainn before he killed his foster-brother Ferdia. Now let's see if you can grasp this one my friend. The Son of Nes, battle-proud, drinks you say, the choicest mead. Choiser still -a brimming sea- which I have taken frequently."

A knowing groan and then an echo followed that.

"You love to quote tragedies to much. Derdriu lamenting the death of Noisiu whom she had escaped with too the forest instead of marrying the King of Ulster whom to she was promised."

"Well you couldn't think of a stumper for me. So shut up and let's eat some of this nice chicken that you've been cooking for three hours. Hmm. Where did you store that wine to ferment again? Was it among the comedies of the Greek texts?"

"Comedies."

A man came running towards Park. He noticed the new looking man and smiled. Bowing for a moment he went off and grabbed a scroll. Pulling it down he unfurled it to reveal a large bottle of dark red liquid. Glancing at Park once more he said.

"You want some chicken? We've been frying it up some extra to give to the dogs that roam here but there should be enough for you."

Park milled over the deal, and said, "Well, I could use something to eat. I wanna save my dough for later."

He hoped they wouldn't give him the worst scraps. But, well....he was the vagrant looking guy here. Though a well dressed vagrant with Scottish overtones...

Park milled over the deal, and said, "Well, I could use something to eat. I wanna save my dough for later."

He hoped they wouldn't give him the worst scraps. But, well....he was the vagrant looking guy here. Though a well dressed vagrant with Scottish overtones...
The man beckoned him over to a small fire looking thing with a man sitting next to it. Scrolls littered the ground around and a machine gun nestled against his feet.

"For the antlions." He explained as best he could looking sheepish. A shriek off into the distance strengthened his point. A big burly looking antlion came up and nuzzled the man with the machine gun with a dog like fondness.

"That's Gihbli. He's got a straight AI dump from a Pwnage wreckage we scavenged a few years back really made it easier to put these guys up. People keep 'em as pets nowadays."

A plate was passed to Park by the other man who had loaded it with chicken and a gravy like substance. A roll rested on it and the other man sat leaning against a large stack of books.

"You know a man can live down here for most of a decade and not see it all. We have. Ted and I at least. Been here since 91. We go out sometimes but for the most part we stay here. So where you from?"

The man beckoned him over to a small fire looking thing with a man sitting next to it. Scrolls littered the ground around and a machine gun nestled against his feet.

"For the antlions." He explained as best he could looking sheepish. A shriek off into the distance strengthened his point. A big burly looking antlion came up and nuzzled the man with the machine gun with a dog like fondness.

"That's Gihbli. He's got a straight AI dump from a Pwnage wreckage we scavenged a few years back really made it easier to put these guys up. People keep 'em as pets nowadays."

A plate was passed to Park by the other man who had loaded it with chicken and a gravy like substance. A roll rested on it and the other man sat leaning against a large stack of books.

"You know a man can live down here for most of a decade and not see it all. We have. Ted and I at least. Been here since 91. We go out sometimes but for the most part we stay here. So where you from?"

Park said, "Well, I'm from Upper Xen. I was a Korean, part Scottish, descended from Woodrow Wilson. Served in the Auxiliaries, till the Reds got me and I was honorably discharged. Did time in a Mod gang in HK for a few years, was gonna be a good student, but some dick framed me for cheating on an essay. So, I'm here now, wandering about."

Park said, "Well, I'm from Upper Xen. I was a Korean, part Scottish, descended from Woodrow Wilson. Served in the Auxiliaries, till the Reds got me and I was honorably discharged. Did time in a Mod gang in HK for a few years, was gonna be a good student, but some dick framed me for cheating on an essay. So, I'm here now, wandering about."
"Ah! You're Xenian! Well then have another plate." The men seemed overjoyed to meet someone from Upper Xen. In a strange way....

The man other than Ted spoke quite clearly to Park for a moment. "I have an aunt who recently moved down into Gaelic Oz, that's what we call our stake in Australia, and I have some land to me own over in Eastern Mexico. Right now though I'm letting Sawneys use it as a breeding area. You know over in Ireland they've recently gotten hit by the UX anime bug. Buncha RALMer G-Mods all the rage now. We're gonna hit this big old soccer match in Zaire in thirty minutes on the tell. You wanna watch? Or not whatever."

The man grew sheepish for a moment realizing that he hadn't told Park his name.

"Name's Ferdia. My mom had a thing for naming all her children after dead warriors from the old stories........Right well would you like to stay or go up-top?"

"Ah! You're Xenian! Well then have another plate." The men seemed overjoyed to meet someone from Upper Xen. In a strange way....

The man other than Ted spoke quite clearly to Park for a moment. "I have an aunt who recently moved down into Gaelic Oz, that's what we call our stake in Australia, and I have some land to me own over in Eastern Mexico. Right now though I'm letting Sawneys use it as a breeding area. You know over in Ireland they've recently gotten hit by the UX anime bug. Buncha RALMer G-Mods all the rage now. We're gonna hit this big old soccer match in Zaire in thirty minutes on the tell. You wanna watch? Or not whatever."

The man grew sheepish for a moment realizing that he hadn't told Park his name.

"Name's Ferdia. My mom had a thing for naming all her children after dead warriors from the old stories........Right well would you like to stay or go up-top?"

Park said, "Well, I suppose it would be nice to watch some sports. It has been a while since I got to see a TV."

As he followed Ferdia, he said, "Say....you mentioned Mods in Ireland? Atre they calmer than our boys, or they just as rambunctious?"

Park said, "Well, I suppose it would be nice to watch some sports. It has been a while since I got to see a TV."

As he followed Ferdia, he said, "Say....you mentioned Mods in Ireland? Atre they calmer than our boys, or they just as rambunctious?"
"Well they're more of a vigilante 'zation. They've been taking out a bunch of old Turkish terrorists and Mafioso groups that were involved with the hashish trade." Ferdia said while standing and dragging a large nice looking television set.

He flipped it on and cursed in Cantonese as only static came up for a moment. Then he got it to work, dancing about for a moment he sat down as an African language networked over the screen. Then it began speaking in deep-toned English before a bunch of large virile looking African players appeared on the screen.

The game began........

"Who're you rooting for Green and white or Red and blue?" A quick exchange went back and forth amongst them before they settled on a team. Then they became regular soccer hooligans rooting and cheering loudly as the teams warmed up and finally ran at each other......

BOOM! That's what the sound would've been had anything interesting happened to him. Invariably he found himself in a nice short hall with doors all tightly closed. A large green sign hung from the entrance to the hallway. Sleep Here it read. A pleasant enough man passed by on the way to his room. The dog followed him down the hall. It stayed close at all times as they went down. A friendly looking help desk was positioned right there in front of him. A friendly looking short green female goblin-esque thing raised an eyebrow at him and quirked her head.

"Ello hoir oo?"
"Errr...M' Squee. 'S dere any asprin 'round here?" Squee fidgeted. There was a large yellow bruise forming on his forhead where the crazed maid-person had slung him into the wall, and another on his right arm where Goblinology had impacted him.
The kilt was making him uncomfortable as well. Squee did not feel...right. Most Goblins wear at least ten layers of clothes at all times.

"Well they're more of a vigilante 'zation. They've been taking out a bunch of old Turkish terrorists and Mafioso groups that were involved with the hashish trade." Ferdia said while standing and dragging a large nice looking television set.

He flipped it on and cursed in Cantonese as only static came up for a moment. Then he got it to work, dancing about for a moment he sat down as an African language networked over the screen. Then it began speaking in deep-toned English before a bunch of large virile looking African players appeared on the screen.

The game began........

"Who're you rooting for Green and white or Red and blue?" A quick exchange went back and forth amongst them before they settled on a team. Then they became regular soccer hooligans rooting and cheering loudly as the teams warmed up and finally ran at each other......

Park smiled. Looks like the Mods could be redeemed after all.....

He sat down, and said, trying not to anger any fan faction: "Well...who's the underdog here? I am not familiar with the local teams, I must say."

"Errr...M' Squee. 'S dere any asprin 'round here?" Squee fidgeted. There was a large yellow bruise forming on his forhead where the crazed maid-person had slung him into the wall, and another on his right arm where Goblinology had impacted him.
The kilt was making him uncomfortable as well. Squee did not feel...right. Most Goblins wear at least ten layers of clothes at all times.
A cold breeze blew threw for a moment almost out of nowhere. It lifted the kilt just a bit above the knees and the female goblin-esque thing laughed at his predicament.

"Sue wot clan'eh from?"

She hopped down and came forward handing a bottle to him and smiling sweetly. She looked at his face with a look of puzzlement though.

"You're different than all the advisors around here. Are you from the Mexican excursions? I've never met anyone from the Mexican excursions........

The dog licked her face warmly as she scratched his head and leaned heavily on him while grinning at him waiting for an answer.

Park smiled. Looks like the Mods could be redeemed after all.....

He sat down, and said, trying not to anger any fan faction: "Well...who's the underdog here? I am not familiar with the local teams, I must say."
Ted answered.

"The Underdog'd be the Yului. Green and white. Don't worry about not knowing the local teams. They live in Zaire afterall."

Ted and Ferdia laughed while Gihbli stalked the shadows around the camp. He made a strange computer like noise as he scanned the darkness beyond the modest encampment. If it weren't for the massive shelves that were revealed one could've easily forgotten they were in a library......

A cold breeze blew threw for a moment almost out of nowhere. It lifted the kilt just a bit above the knees and the female goblin-esque thing laughed at his predicament.

"Sue wot clan'eh from?"

She hopped down and came forward handing a bottle to him and smiling sweetly. She looked at his face with a look of puzzlement though.

"You're different than all the advisors around here. Are you from the Mexican excursions? I've never met anyone from the Mexican excursions........

The dog licked her face warmly as she scratched his head and leaned heavily on him while grinning at him waiting for an answer.
Squee grimaced and would have blushed if he had got the correct capiliaries and such, but he didnt so he couldnt.
"'M from da Blood Moon tribe, I fink dats south uv 'ere. Swampy in da middle, lots 'o desert 'n stuff outside. Long ways away though."
He fiddled with the small pistol, trying to clear some of the fuzz.

Squee grimaced and would have blushed if he had got the correct capiliaries and such, but he didnt so he couldnt.
"'M from da Blood Moon tribe, I fink dats south uv 'ere. Swampy in da middle, lots 'o desert 'n stuff outside. Long ways away though."
He fiddled with the small pistol, trying to clear some of the fuzz.
She seemed puzzled for a moment.

"Yae mean they have Advisors in uter countries?"

She blinked and mulled this over.

"Sees accurding to uir history there's no uter Advisors out there. Joost oos. Oh! I tink you a gublun! We're Advisors. Almost da same ting!"

She laughed and shuffled for a moment looking at Squee for a moment.

"Oh me name's Ahia! I shoulda mentioned dat earlier. They let me takes your clothes."

She giggled at this memory and blushed the best way that Advisors can. Their ears turn pink and black...........

She seemed puzzled for a moment.

"Yae mean they have Advisors in uter countries?"

She blinked and mulled this over.

"Sees accurding to uir history there's no uter Advisors out there. Joost oos. Oh! I tink you a gublun! We're Advisors. Almost da same ting!"

She laughed and shuffled for a moment looking at Squee for a moment.

"Oh me name's Ahia! I shoulda mentioned dat earlier. They let me takes your clothes."

She giggled at this memory and blushed the best way that Advisors can. Their ears turn pink and black...........

Most of this flood of information passed directly over Squee's head, 'Advisors' had thrown him off a bit. Asking a Goblin, or local Goblin derivative, for advice would yield a puzzled look, or possibly a finger.
"Err...yeah, 'm a Goblin. Srry 'bout dat, I dint know dere was any such fing as Adviserz...I fought you meant like...people dat gives advice and...stuff....err...my clothes?"

Most of this flood of information passed directly over Squee's head, 'Advisors' had thrown him off a bit. Asking a Goblin, or local Goblin derivative, for advice would yield a puzzled look, or possibly a finger.
"Err...yeah, 'm a Goblin. Srry 'bout dat, I dint know dere was any such fing as Adviserz...I fought you meant like...people dat gives advice and...stuff....err...my clothes?"
"Yeah we ate your clothes. Well actually the antlions did. Anyways aye. Advisors have existed for thousands of years as a sort of all-knowing guide to the humans that we chose. Turns out we're actually distant cousins of goblins. And yeah.........I've seen you naked. It's funny isn't it?"

She scratched her head, which was covered in in dark black wily hair, before shrugging and jumping back over onto the desk.

"So anything else you need deary?"

"Yeah we ate your clothes. Well actually the antlions did. Anyways aye. Advisors have existed for thousands of years as a sort of all-knowing guide to the humans that we chose. Turns out we're actually distant cousins of goblins. And yeah.........I've seen you naked. It's funny isn't it?"

She scratched her head, which was covered in in dark black wily hair, before shrugging and jumping back over onto the desk.

"So anything else you need deary?"
"Errr...why did dey eat my clothes? And what 'm I s'posed ta do? Some guy jus' sorta grabbed me offa da streets and frew me into da kitchen, den da cook tol' me ta go to da library, and some crazy maid person frew me inta a wall an' I got hit by dis book, an' I woke up in 'ere. Im moderatly concussed and very confused."

"Errr...why did dey eat my clothes? And what 'm I s'posed ta do? Some guy jus' sorta grabbed me offa da streets and frew me into da kitchen, den da cook tol' me ta go to da library, and some crazy maid person frew me inta a wall an' I got hit by dis book, an' I woke up in 'ere. Im moderatly concussed and very confused."
"Dey got 'ungry an' ate yer clothes. I sooggest finding a juub ere. I naed a'elper anyways. Yae cuud elp mae."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Markus Oleander had changed. Ever since he'd found the box with the dead man at the Hedonistics meeting he could only get satisfaction in a few things. Those things being learning, leading, and fighting. Even though he was subjected to the best sexual exploits they didn't satisfy him like they used too. Even though drugs were bared before him he could feel nothing from them other than the slightest of buzzes. Even though the best entertainments were scheduled for him they did not entertain him half as much as training men and women to fight. Nothing made him feel so complete as studying military history, recruiting people to join him, and fighting those he trained.

Soon Markus had an army. It was an army unlike those mostly seen. Rejects and outcasts. Reformed prisoners and G-Mods from Ireland. Regular everyday businessmen and the lowest of the low. He gathered them secretly in clandestine meetings where they trained and drilled and became warriors reminiscent of the old days. They learned self-control and they learned to hate excessive pleasures. They learned to think as units and not individuals. They learned history, art, poetry, and how to kill.

Markus called them Archangels. Inspired by the movie Fight Club he'd even go so far as to teach them how to operate in isolated sleeper cells within any facet of life. They were the common man's Sawneys. They were unstoppable. They were determined. They were tough. They were an army of such nature never before known on Earth. And Markus didn't know what to do with them.....

OOC:
Perhaps he could start a fast food chain of some sort :)
Perhaps, if you havent noticed, Squee is one of the rare sort of Goblins with a bit of self control, reasoning skills and suchlike that his fellows dont really have. Girls make him nervous, but that doesnt really matter because Goblin females look exactly like the males until they get pregnant.
Generaly theyre the sort that get recruited by the intelligence agencies because, obviously, they dont make a scence constantly, or hum the theme to mission impossible constantly.


IC:
"Err...yeah. I al'redy gotta job, jus' not 'ere. I prolly need som' kinda card or somefin'. Umm...mebe see joo later, gotta go find da library, I fink." Squee performed an about face, very nearly leaving a scorch mark on the carpet, and scooted off in a likely looking direction.

Ted answered.

"The Underdog'd be the Yului. Green and white. Don't worry about not knowing the local teams. They live in Zaire afterall."

Ted and Ferdia laughed while Gihbli stalked the shadows around the camp. He made a strange computer like noise as he scanned the darkness beyond the modest encampment. If it weren't for the massive shelves that were revealed one could've easily forgotten they were in a library......

Park simply said, "Hmmm....ok."

He got his chicken, so he decided to eat up. He ate slowly, savoring the chicken that had been just fried up. "Not bad..." he thought.

He watched the teams make fantastic kicks and passes with their feet, and soon, Park was caught up in the fury. He began hooting, going, "Yeah! Whoo!" and other things of the sort.

He liked these guys.....he had a feeling he'd fit right in. Maybe he'd wait until later to ask about the Gahlan Scroll.

OOC: CE, I don't think I really have the motivation to continue in this RP. Sorry man, I just don't feel obligated to continue. I've got other things to plan for Green Sun and other RPs.

OOC: CE, I don't think I really have the motivation to continue in this RP. Sorry man, I just don't feel obligated to continue. I've got other things to plan for Green Sun and other RPs.

OOC: Is cool.

"Err...yeah. I al'redy gotta job, jus' not 'ere. I prolly need som' kinda card or somefin'. Umm...mebe see joo later, gotta go find da library, I fink." Squee performed an about face, very nearly leaving a scorch mark on the carpet, and scooted off in a likely looking direction.

The dog followed after its new master as he scooted off towards an area. Ahia frowned at the scorch marks in her carpet but shrugged and got back to work. A strong smell of chicken and stew echoed along the corridors that made themselves known before him. The scent reverberated off of the walls that he approached until it called him into the dark recess of a library. BOOKS! All around the were. Filling the massive shelves. Spilling over onto the floor. Darkness surrounded him whenever he went towards the middle. There was life here. Life that clung to the pages of old forgotten texts. Life that run through the eternal night and never stopped. Life from other times, other worlds. Even in this place that spoke so well and openly of dead men.....life was abundant.

Park simply said, "Hmmm....ok."

He got his chicken, so he decided to eat up. He ate slowly, savoring the chicken that had been just fried up. "Not bad..." he thought.

He watched the teams make fantastic kicks and passes with their feet, and soon, Park was caught up in the fury. He began hooting, going, "Yeah! Whoo!" and other things of the sort.

He liked these guys.....he had a feeling he'd fit right in. Maybe he'd wait until later to ask about the Gahlan Scroll.

As the game went out of focus for a moment Ted turned to Park and asked.

"Hey what you here for anyways?"

Ferdia didn't turn around as he punched the antenna on the set and it came back into focus. A commercial was on showing a man charging across the plains toward an elephant. The man died. Then it showed God handing the man something. Now he was charging the plains toward an elephant again. This time though he had lots of hair. The elephant was knocked over by the man headbutting it in the legs. The screen read. BUY TOLLY'S HAIR OINTMENT! It's good for elephants.

OOC: CE, I don't think I really have the motivation to continue in this RP. Sorry man, I just don't feel obligated to continue. I've got other things to plan for Green Sun and other RPs.

OOC: Is cool.

"Err...yeah. I al'redy gotta job, jus' not 'ere. I prolly need som' kinda card or somefin'. Umm...mebe see joo later, gotta go find da library, I fink." Squee performed an about face, very nearly leaving a scorch mark on the carpet, and scooted off in a likely looking direction.

The dog followed after its new master as he scooted off towards an area. Ahia frowned at the scorch marks in her carpet but shrugged and got back to work. A strong smell of chicken and stew echoed along the corridors that made themselves known before him. The scent reverberated off of the walls that he approached until it called him into the dark recess of a library. BOOKS! All around the were. Filling the massive shelves. Spilling over onto the floor. Darkness surrounded him whenever he went towards the middle. There was life here. Life that clung to the pages of old forgotten texts. Life that run through the eternal night and never stopped. Life from other times, other worlds. Even in this place that spoke so well and openly of dead men.....life was abundant.

Park simply said, "Hmmm....ok."

He got his chicken, so he decided to eat up. He ate slowly, savoring the chicken that had been just fried up. "Not bad..." he thought.

He watched the teams make fantastic kicks and passes with their feet, and soon, Park was caught up in the fury. He began hooting, going, "Yeah! Whoo!" and other things of the sort.

He liked these guys.....he had a feeling he'd fit right in. Maybe he'd wait until later to ask about the Gahlan Scroll.

As the game went out of focus for a moment Ted turned to Park and asked.

"Hey what you here for anyways?"

Ferdia didn't turn around as he punched the antenna on the set and it came back into focus. A commercial was on showing a man charging across the plains toward an elephant. The man died. Then it showed God handing the man something. Now he was charging the plains toward an elephant again. This time though he had lots of hair. The elephant was knocked over by the man headbutting it in the legs. The screen read. BUY TOLLY'S HAIR OINTMENT! It's good for elephants.

Park thought, "Should I say this?"

He then said, "Doctor's orders. I've been under considerable stress, so the doctor said, 'Take a vacation.'"

Of course, he was lying, though he did have a lot of stress and his leg had a slight limp since the war. Still, that wasn't the reason he came.....but then, meh.

He then said, "I heard about these Scrolls....what is that....the Gahlan Scrolls?"