NationStates Jolt Archive

RBNNN

"Good evening, this is Walter Kraunkheit of Roach-Busters National News Network, your source for government-approved news. Today, an ecstatic Generalissimo J.L. announced to a delighted public that he will soon be a father-in-law. His daughter, Rinoa, has been proposed to by President Jake Featherston IV of the Reunited States of America. The Generalissimo describes President Featherston as an "urbane, chivalrous, intelligent, industrious fellow of great integrity and strong moral character, whose disdain for socialism is an inspiration to us all." The First Lady is similarly excited, and told reporters this afternoon, "I just can't believe it. My little girl is getting married! I guess, soon, I'll be a grandma!" The Generalissimo then laughed and said, "Being a grandpa would be fine and dandy, so long as I don't have to change [expletive] diapers." The Generalissimo will be spending over ten billion dollars on this wedding, which will feature fireworks, over 5,000 delicacies, over 220 1-ton barrels of wine, 550 desserts, performances by all of Featherston and Rinoa's favorite bands, and guest appearances by some of their favorite anime voice actors. It will truly be an historic event. The Generalissimo said, "First my Minister of Diplomacy, now my baby girl. It truly is the dawn of a new era of friendship between my country and Mr. Featherston's." The wedding is tentatively scheduled for this weekend."

Jake was rushing around, making calls. He had Karl, who was actually hunting in the Blue Ridge, and Kimiko, who was out torturing a stool pigeon, on a conference call.

"So guys....wanna go to the wedding?"

Karl said: "Ja....I am willing to attend your wedding. Can I bring a gift?"

Jake then said, "Uh, that is kinda encouraged, go ahead."

Kimiko said, "Nice....of course, Jakey. I'll go-I'll bring an original painting of the bride and groom."

Jake said: "Nice...arrive at St. Andrew's Presbyterian, in Philly. There will be security."

Karl and Kimiko said, "Not a problem."

Jake was rushing around, making calls. He had Karl, who was actually hunting in the Blue Ridge, and Kimiko, who was out torturing a stool pigeon, on a conference call.

"So guys....wanna go to the wedding?"

Karl said: "Ja....I am willing to attend your wedding. Can I bring a gift?"

Jake then said, "Uh, that is kinda encouraged, go ahead."

Kimiko said, "Nice....of course, Jakey. I'll go-I'll bring an original painting of the bride and groom."

Jake said: "Nice...arrive at St. Andrew's Presbyterian, in Philly. There will be security."

Karl and Kimiko said, "Not a problem."

Rinoa walked in and said, "Uncle Karl, Aunt Kimiko!" and excitedly hugged them. "I missed you guys so much!"

TO: Generalissimo J.L
FROM: The God-Emperor Count JWolf

Hey, JL. Save me four seats at the wedding. I will bring my three brides. Damn, I am pimp. Ain’t I? Oh….Where was I at? Oh…..yeah. Three cheers for you and your family. Where is going to happen at? Plus, Rinoa is little to young to start having babies.

TO: Generalissimo J.L
FROM: The God-Emperor Count JWolf

Hey, JL. Save me four seats at the wedding. I will bring my three brides. Damn, I am pimp. Ain’t I? Oh….Where was I at? Oh…..yeah. Three cheers for you and your family. Where is going to happen at? Plus, Rinoa is little to young to start having babies.

Will do, old friend. Oh, and it's going to happen at a Presbyterian Church in Philadelphia, don't remember the name.

-Generalissimo J.L.

Karl said, "Guten Tag! I present a gift...to you."

Sure enough, he produced a box, wrapped in camouflage paper and slightly heavy. "I guarantee, you will love it. I cannot tell you what it is now, though."

Karl then stepped back, and lauhed joyfully. Kimiko, meanwhile, stepped out an offered her gift.

"Rinoa....your father is a good man, and I trust that you, his daughter, will be a wonderful wife to a darling husband. Jake is a good man, I see the happiness you two have...."

She then broke into tears, and said, "...and I wish you the best!"

She then stepped back, and began wiping up with a hanky. Karl said, "Me too...I only wish the best."

Karl said, "Guten Tag! I present a gift...to you."

Sure enough, he produced a box, wrapped in camouflage paper and slightly heavy. "I guarantee, you will love it. I cannot tell you what it is now, though."

Karl then stepped back, and lauhed joyfully. Kimiko, meanwhile, stepped out an offered her gift.

"Rinoa....your father is a good man, and I trust that you, his daughter, will be a wonderful wife to a darling husband. Jake is a good man, I see the happiness you two have...."

She then broke into tears, and said, "...and I wish you the best!"

She then stepped back, and began wiping up with a hanky. Karl said, "Me too...I only wish the best."

"Ahhh, that's so sweet," she said. "So, have you and Chong decided if you want children or not?"

(OOC: Should Kimiko and Moua have children eventually?)

ooc: not unless you want to paranoidly fear for their safety.

ooc: not unless you want to paranoidly fear for their safety.

(OOC: Why do you say that?)

"Ahhh, that's so sweet," she said. "So, have you and Chong decided if you want children or not?"

Kimiko said, "Well, I would like to yes, if even only one or two, to keep things calm."

ooc: it takes 30 seconds to kidnap someone and 5 seconds to execute them.

Imperial Telegram to Generalissimo J.L. and President Featherstone

The Grand Imperium of Risban would like to extend its congratulation to you both. Emperor Scorpius and his wife, Empress Nora Courtney, would be honored to attend the wedding ceremony if it is possible.

Good luck with the marraige.

Sincerely,
Alexander Perkins, High Minister of Foreign Affairs

Kimiko said, "Well, I would like to yes, if even only one or two, to keep things calm."

(OOC: Want to make a thread where she and Moua become parents?)

Imperial Telegram to Generalissimo J.L. and President Featherstone

The Grand Imperium of Risban would like to extend its congratulation to you both. Emperor Scorpius and his wife, Empress Nora Courtney, would be honored to attend the wedding ceremony if it is possible.

Good luck with the marraige.

Sincerely,
Alexander Perkins, High Minister of Foreign Affairs

Of course!

-Rinoa

(OOC: Want to make a thread where she and Moua become parents?)

Sure. We can do like a birth announcement. How about in a Philadelphia hospital?

Sure. We can do like a birth announcement. How about in a Philadelphia hospital?

(OOC: Cool. Want to do it now?)

OOC: Sure.

Imperial Communique

I send my good wishes to the couple and wish them many years together happily. If permitted, I would like to attend the proceedings.

-Shah Khosru III

Imperial Communique

I send my good wishes to the couple and wish them many years together happily. If permitted, I would like to attend the proceedings.

-Shah Khosru III

Sure. Fine by me; any friend of J.L.'s is a friend of mine.

Jake Featherston IV

Imperial Communique

I send my good wishes to the couple and wish them many years together happily. If permitted, I would like to attend the proceedings.

-Shah Khosru III

Of course, my friend! I would be delighted if you attended.

-Generalissimo J.L.

Will do, old friend. Oh, and it's going to happen at a Presbyterian Church in Philadelphia, don't remember the name.

-Generalissimo J.L.

TO: Generalissimo J.L
FROM: The God-Emperor Count JWolf

Ok, I will be there many two days before the wedding. I will be bearing gifts. A lot of gifts because I’m the richest uncle. See you then.

Unfortunately, I have been feeling extremely ill lately. As such, I may not be able to attend the wedding.

-Generalissimo J.L.

Unfortunately, I have been feeling extremely ill lately. As such, I may not be able to attend the wedding.

-Generalissimo J.L.

Oh. Well, get well soon, man.

BTW, what's this about freeing Shoobans? You're makin' me nervous, no offense-this action, if it is true, isn't like you.


Jake Featherston IV

Oh. Well, get well soon, man.

BTW, what's this about freeing Shoobans? You're makin' me nervous, no offense-this action, if it is true, isn't like you.


Jake Featherston IV

I don't know what's come over me. But I've been having lots of headaches, fevers, dizzy spells, and blackouts lately.

-Generalissimo J.L.

Meanwhile, at St. Andrew's:

"Yes...I understand. Okay. Bye."

Jake was running around, trying to get the wedding set up. So far, he had devoted an entire Enlightened Guardians platoon, and a Tokko Brigade to guarding the complex. Any and all vulnerable areas in the vents were sealed, with respect to actually letting air in and out. Men were constantly debugging the backrooms.

All around, the decorations were being set up. The Generalissimo's $10 billion were being spent wisely, as lavish food and decorations, and entertainments were being set up, the planned banquet being set up at a hotel ballroom, which was also being locked down and heavily inspected by security.

Jake said to himself, "Rinoa'll love this...I hope."

He then called her and said, "Honey, yeah....the preps are coming along nicely, your dad really helped us out."

She smiled. "Yeah, he did. Anyway, I hope he gets better soon." She broke down and started sobbing.

She smiled. "Yeah, he did. Anyway, I hope he gets better soon." She broke down and started sobbing.

Jake then said, "Relax, honey...rest assuredly, I sent Guardians and I had Karl send Tokko and his hackers, the Bow Bow Footy Kick Panzer Squad. So, things'll stay reasonably calm, nay, ironclad shut while he recovers. BTW, this is a secure line....so nobody will hear that last part but you and me."

He then said, "Say....does he need any more doctors? I can send a neurosurgeon and a few other specialists to help out."

Jake then said, "Relax, honey...rest assuredly, I sent Guardians and I had Karl send Tokko and his hackers, the Bow Bow Footy Kick Panzer Squad. So, things'll stay reasonably calm, nay, ironclad shut while he recovers. BTW, this is a secure line....so nobody will hear that last part but you and me."

He then said, "Say....does he need any more doctors? I can send a neurosurgeon and a few other specialists to help out."

She was crying almost uncontrollably. "I don't want Daddy to die," she said, holding onto Jake tight. "Please, please send more doctors! I don't want him to die!"

She was crying almost uncontrollably. "I don't want Daddy to die," she said, holding onto Jake tight. "Please, please send more doctors! I don't want him to die!"

Jake said, "Keep cool.....I'll send a medical team to RB City before you can say 'miracle.'"

Jake then picked up a phone in the church office, and sure enough, made the order to send a medical team to RB City.

He then returned to the cell and said, "It's done."

Jake said, "Keep cool.....I'll send a medical team to RB City before you can say 'miracle.'"

Jake then picked up a phone in the church office, and sure enough, made the order to send a medical team to RB City.

He then returned to the cell and said, "It's done."

"Thanks, baby!" she said, and gave him a very long, very wet kiss.

"Thanks, baby!" she said, and gave him a very long, very wet kiss.

Jake then said, "Not a problem honey."

Jake then said, "Not a problem honey."

She nodded in the direction of his room. "Want to...?" She winked. "It would really cheer me up."

She nodded in the direction of his room. "Want to...?" She winked. "It would really cheer me up."

Jake said, "Well, I guess it won't take more than five minutes. Besides, how can I say no?"

He smiled, and led her to the room....

OOC: Skipping this part....

Jake said, "Well, I guess it won't take more than five minutes. Besides, how can I say no?"

He smiled, and led her to the room....

OOC: Skipping this part....

(OOC: Thanks.)

Their timing was perfect; just as soon as they were all done and had left the room, baby Amelia started crying.

(OOC: Thanks.)

Their timing was perfect; just as soon as they were all done and had left the room, baby Amelia started crying.

Jake then cuddled Amelia, and said, "Now, now little one, let's see what you want...."

He then began rocking her gently, back and forth, singing "Hush little baby don't say a word..." before offering her a bottle.

Jake then cuddled Amelia, and said, "Now, now little one, let's see what you want...."

He then began rocking her gently, back and forth, singing "Hush little baby don't say a word..." before offering her a bottle.

A complacent, sleepy smile appeared on Amelia's face, just seconds before sleep overcame her. She softly snored.

OOC: Here is list of what Uncle JWolf gave to the new couple.

Twelve pure bred Transylvanian horses
A mansion near Sibiu (70 bedrooms / 30 baths on 20 acres of land)
Four Armored SUVs (Two 2005 Chevrolet Avalanches and Two 2005 Chevrolet Suburban)
Two 2005 Chevrolet Corvettes
One 2002 Rolls-Royce Corniche
One 1969 Corvette Stingray
One 1958 Chevrolet Bel Air
One 2005 Cadillac Escalade
One 2005 Lamborghini Murciélago R-GT
One 2001 Lamborghini Diablo VT 6.0 Special Edition
One 1999 Lamborghini Diablo GTR
One 1971 Lamborghini Miura P400 SV
One 1986 Lamborghini LM002
A lifetime pass to everyone of the Count’s night clubs in the Dominion

Holy crap, are you generous! Thanks a lot, Uncle Count!

-Rinoa

Count, may I say: you rock!

Jake Featherston IV

OOC: Here is list of what Uncle JWolf give to the new couple.

Twelve pure bred Transylvanian horses
A mansion near Sibiu (70 bedrooms / 30 baths on 20 acres of land)
Four Armored SUVs (Two 2005 Chevrolet Avalanches and Two 2005 Chevrolet Suburban)
Two 2005 Chevrolet Corvettes
One 2002 Rolls-Royce Corniche
One 1969 Corvette Stingray
One 1958 Chevrolet Bel Air
One 2005 Cadillac Escalade
One 2005 Lamborghini Murciélago R-GT
One 2001 Lamborghini Diablo VT 6.0 Special Edition
One 1999 Lamborghini Diablo GTR
One 1971 Lamborghini Miura P400 SV
One 1986 Lamborghini LM002
A lifetime pass to everyone of the Count’s night clubs in the Dominion

OOC: umm....I am getting married too...hehe...gifts...haha...hey RB please check your tgs man...

Holy crap, are you generous! Thanks a lot, Uncle Count!

-Rinoa

Anything for you, dear.

~ Count JWolf

Count, may I say: you rock!

Jake Featherston IV

Yeah, I do rock and roll. Plus, I'm rich.

~ Count JWolf