Chocolaquarium
22-04-2005, 03:12
For Immediate Release --
Risk-Free International Banking Haven Opened via the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium, No Questions Asked
Galedium, Chocolaquarium, 2 Freyum, Second Year of the Glorious Revolution -- Nations with a need for secure, confidential financial services may now take advantage of the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium.
Since the People of Chocolaquarium, recognizing with minimal bloodshed the corruption and treason of their previous, "democratic," government, ceded authority to the triumverate of Joseph Melanger, the democracy's former Minister of Defense and Intelligence, Hannibal Crepsadirum, the former Minister of Police and Internal Security, and Sasha Rotenager, the former Minister of Finance, the internal policies of the state have been rationalized, and their benefits are now available to the international community. In the interests of internal economic development and international peace, the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium is open for trade from all nations, no questions asked.
Chocolaquarium, a landlocked, mountainous state (with island colonies) maintains policies of absolute military neutrality and nonaggressiveness, bank secrecy, indiscriminate availability of banking resources, and near-complete exemption from taxation for foreign income.
Banking in Chocolaquarium brings the unparalleled security of knowing that your wealth is protected by a police force of unparalleled pervasiveness and energy, and a guarantee of complete confidentiality. The Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium is ideal for those rulers who, for whatever reason, feel the need to conceal their national or personal asset acculumation from traitorous people, mutinous ministers, or meddling auditors, or have been accused of imaginary crimes like "looting the treasury" or "mass confiscation of property."
Unlike the banks of lesser nations, assets held in the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium are at no risk of expropriation from inconveniently elected socialist governments or revolutionaries, as elections have been abolished and outlawed and the population is forcibly prevented from meeting in groups large enough to ferment revolt.
Chocolaquarium maintains a token 1% tax on foreign revenues generated in Chocolaquarium, does not recognize any legal process from any nation whatsoever, does not permit the disclosure of foreign bank clients, and plans shortly to introduce payment of interest into its banking operations, as it very shortly expects its borrower base to stabilize.
The Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium can handle and protect assets of any level of liquidity and tangibility, from gold to state secrets and objects 'de art.
Bank Chocolaquarium today! Telegrams may be sent to the Finance Minister, who provides personal service to foreign sovereigns.
Risk-Free International Banking Haven Opened via the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium, No Questions Asked
Galedium, Chocolaquarium, 2 Freyum, Second Year of the Glorious Revolution -- Nations with a need for secure, confidential financial services may now take advantage of the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium.
Since the People of Chocolaquarium, recognizing with minimal bloodshed the corruption and treason of their previous, "democratic," government, ceded authority to the triumverate of Joseph Melanger, the democracy's former Minister of Defense and Intelligence, Hannibal Crepsadirum, the former Minister of Police and Internal Security, and Sasha Rotenager, the former Minister of Finance, the internal policies of the state have been rationalized, and their benefits are now available to the international community. In the interests of internal economic development and international peace, the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium is open for trade from all nations, no questions asked.
Chocolaquarium, a landlocked, mountainous state (with island colonies) maintains policies of absolute military neutrality and nonaggressiveness, bank secrecy, indiscriminate availability of banking resources, and near-complete exemption from taxation for foreign income.
Banking in Chocolaquarium brings the unparalleled security of knowing that your wealth is protected by a police force of unparalleled pervasiveness and energy, and a guarantee of complete confidentiality. The Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium is ideal for those rulers who, for whatever reason, feel the need to conceal their national or personal asset acculumation from traitorous people, mutinous ministers, or meddling auditors, or have been accused of imaginary crimes like "looting the treasury" or "mass confiscation of property."
Unlike the banks of lesser nations, assets held in the Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium are at no risk of expropriation from inconveniently elected socialist governments or revolutionaries, as elections have been abolished and outlawed and the population is forcibly prevented from meeting in groups large enough to ferment revolt.
Chocolaquarium maintains a token 1% tax on foreign revenues generated in Chocolaquarium, does not recognize any legal process from any nation whatsoever, does not permit the disclosure of foreign bank clients, and plans shortly to introduce payment of interest into its banking operations, as it very shortly expects its borrower base to stabilize.
The Imperial Bank of Chocolaquarium can handle and protect assets of any level of liquidity and tangibility, from gold to state secrets and objects 'de art.
Bank Chocolaquarium today! Telegrams may be sent to the Finance Minister, who provides personal service to foreign sovereigns.