NationStates Jolt Archive


Hey Rose!

Fodmodmadtol
20-04-2005, 20:35
"Bah. This is just getting tedious now."

"Indeed."

"Can't I just hit the big button? Please?"

"But... But I wanted to hit the big button!"

"Who's Lord Chancellor here?!"

"...Me."

---- ---- ---- ----

The Lord Chancellor Aries leaned heavily against the podium, staring dead into the nearest camera. It was a tiny press conference, what with only two members of the press actually being present. A camera man, and the assistant camera man. You might not think a camera man needs an assistant, but ask any decent hard working camera man what they have to put up with all day long, and you will see why every camera man needs an assistant camera man. Besides, it's more pathetic this way. No reporter, get it? Well any who, if you look over at that important looking podium, an important looking man is standing behind it, looking more like an important looking woman, who spent the night drinking with some other important drunkards, who polished off their oh so important evening with an oh so important morning of important cross dressing.

"Good evening, non existent Citizens of Fodmodmadtol. However fictional you all might be, and however fictional I might be for that matter, we're going to be sinking into even more non-existence! Shortly, I will be pressing the big red button."

Curtain drops behind the important person, behind the important podium, seeming an important woman, revealing an UBER important red button fixed into the wall. I mean, like, three yards in diameter, fire engine red. Big. Important. BUTTON.

"We all know what it does, but just because I'm reading from a teleprompter, I shall inform you all once again as to what the red button does! When I press this red button, Fodmodmadtol will sink into a big not-so-important oblivion. What with the, ceasing to be and what have you. But before we press this red button, by a big important person such as myself, leading to a catastrophic not-so-important reaction in Fodmodmadtol, we're declaring War on someone. We've never had a good War, so why not do it before we Poof. Eh? And why not commence with someone who we shall even Haunt. Eh? So without further adieu... Eh..."

Trumpets blare from somewhere off camera. Important person points into camera, lighting becomes dramatic and voice ushers all, deep and important. Omni[endingofchoice], if you will.

"The Island of Rose, prepare for war!"

Cue evil laughter. Flames erupt in the background.