NationStates Jolt Archive

Jeruselem Government News

It's St Patrick's day, and the few Irish in Jeruselem were not at work today. Protestants and Catholics alike, the Irish had organised parties in their communities and there was plenty of alcohol being consumed.

Catholic alcohol outlets have been busy all day with Irish customers snapping up anything Irish or green. It has been reported the Queen Mariah appeared at one of the meetings of Irish Catholic leaders as well as the Irish embassy in short visits before going back to work.

We would report about what was going on at these parties, but our reporters can't understand the Irish accent and can't understand slurred speech either.

We must not forget the occasion is dedicated to Catholic St Patrick and for many, Church services were the order of the day.

When asked about his Irish connections, Cardinal Augustus Brown said "I'm more English than Irish. I don't think my long gone parents had any connection to Ireland."

OOC

Pls post your St Pat's celebrations as a response including drunken speech if necessary.

RINN Broadcast....
"And here we have one of the finest bands in Risbanian Ireland performing the folk ballad, Tim Finnegan's Wake!"



Tim Finnegan lived on Walkin' Street
A gentle Irishman, mighty odd;
He had a brogue both rich and sweet
And to rise in the world he carried a hod.
Now Tim had a sort of the tipplin' way
With a love of the whiskey he was born
And to help him on with his work each day
He'd a "drop of the cray-thur" every morn.

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's Wake!

One mornin' Tim was feelin' full
His head was heavy which made him shake;
He fell from the ladder and broke his skull
And they carried him home his corpse to wake.
They rolled him up in a nice clean sheet
And laid him out upon the bed,
A gallon of whiskey at his feet
And a barrel of porter at his head.

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's Wake!

His friends assembled at the wake
And Mrs. Finnegan called for lunch,
First they brought in tay and cake
Then pipes, tobacco and whiskey punch.
Biddy O'Brien began to bawl
"Such a nice clean corpse, did you ever see?
"O Tim, mavourneen, why did you die?"
"Arragh, hold your gob" said Paddy McGhee!

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's Wake!

Then Maggie O'Connor took up the job
"O Biddy," says she, "You're wrong, I'm sure"
Biddy she gave her a belt in the gob
And left her sprawlin' on the floor.
And then the war did soon engage
'Twas woman to woman and man to man,
Shillelagh law was all the rage
And a row and a ruction soon began.

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's Wake!

Then Mickey Maloney ducked his head
When a noggin of whiskey flew at him,
It missed, and falling on the bed
The liquor scattered over Tim!
The corpse revives! See how he raises!
Timothy rising from the bed,
Says,"Whirl your whiskey around like blazes
Thanum an Dhul! Do you thunk I'm dead?"

Whack fol the darn O, dance to your partner
Whirl the floor, your trotters shake;
Wasn't it the truth I told you
Lots of fun at Finnegan's Wake!


"Stay tuned for more St. Patrick's Day celebrations in the Risban Empire!"

Ye wah? Feck Offf!!!