NationStates Jolt Archive


Behind the Czar: Interview with Charles Hayden

JRV
13-02-2005, 08:19
The following is an interview between Czar Charles Hayden of The Union of Armed Dominions of Fascist Confederacy and one of the most famous JRVian journalists: Susan Petrie. It was broadcast for the first time on the late night JBC News programme You're on camera...

OOC: Bold: Czar Charles Hayden; Normal: Susan Petrie; Italics from this point on = action.

"Hello your Highness, nice to be able to conduct this interview with you."

"Ah, hello Mrs. Petrie. I am glad to be able to be here."

"Women are not treated equal in FC. There is no doubt about this. Why have you such a sexist outlook on life?"

"In the Bible, it states that a woman must not speak in church and the like. I also am a firm believer that women should stay home and raise the family and have no place in politics, business, and industry."

"The Bible also says that homosexuals should be executed. Do you agree with this?"

"Absolutely..."

"Do you allow your own wife to have a say in matters of importance?"

"She planned by birthday ball, did she not?" The Czar proceeds to laugh lightly, before stopping, and waiting for the next question.

Susan smiles. "But does she ever play apart in the running of the country?"

"In some minor things, yes. She seems to be my source for relaxation, thus, another reason women aren't allowed to do much. They should be a person the stressed, working man can come home to and share his thoughts and get out his pent up feelings on."

"So women should be 'trophy wives' to their husbands, would that be a fair enough way to put it?"

"I'm sensing some hostility... But if you must put it so bluntly: yes. They should be men's safe and unscaythed companions for all time."

She nodded. "What is your opinion on 'liberal Christians'?"

"You mean the people who say abortion is okay and homosexuality is alright aslong as it isn't their children? Burn them for heresy."

"I mean Christians who are tolerant. Tolerant of other religions and beliefs."

"Ah... People other than Reformed Protestants--Calvinists-- you mean? As Romans 11:7 states: "What then? Israel hath not obtained that which he seeketh for; but the election hath obtained it, and the rest were blinded." The other relgions and beliefs people follow are a fabrication made by the blind and ignorant. We are the Elect. Those chosen by God to be elevated to superiority."

"Ah ha..." Her voice trailed off. "What happens to non-Christians in your country?"

"Well, since it's illegal to pracitce anything other than Reformed Protestanism--Calvinism--in The Armed Union, what do you think happens? Not like it's unknown that that's a crime calling for capital punishment."

"Does this not conflict with the Bible, which also teaches love and compassion?"

"For his believers. The Bible tells of persecution and torture for the non-Elect."

"So the Bible conflicts with its own teachings then? Because there are a number of passages which do speak of tolerance and love..."

"I quote the Lord in Matthew 10:34: 'Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.'"

"So Jesus Christ came to cause bloodshed?"

"To his non-believers. It states in the Bible that some people were predestined for damnation aswell--yet the exact scripture illudes me."

"Does the sixth commandment not mean anything, then?"

"The sixth commandment is superceded in Numbers 25 when Phineas was zealous for God by killing an inter-racial couple for mating. After that, he was praised and blessed aswell as those who came after him: his family and his supporters."

"So God is a racist?"

"Putting it bluntly. And I'm guessing you're wondering if I take everything in the Bible litrally--and I do. To a degree. Not like I'm going to march around my enemies country and wait for their defense to fall."

"To a degree?"

"Yes, to a degree. As I stated: I don't think if I marched around a communist nation that their ICBM's would blow up and their SAM missiles launch down their own aircraft."

"What are the punishments for fornification and adultery in your nation?"

"Anything from public beating, to forced conscription into the military, to execution. All depends on the case."

"If the wife of a top government official, say, had sex with a gay black man, who in turn had slept with a goat, what would the outcome be?"

"Crude question... But the punishment of that would be... Let's see: Seizure of property, possible deportation of family, and execution."

"... and that would be for the wife? Or the negro? It's important that we clear that one up for our viewers."

"If the wife had knowledge of the fact that the government official was doing it: it would be execution and possibly the execution of her father if he knew of it and was still alive. And for the 'negro'--as you so kindly put it--would be public breaking by the wheel--execution by being tied to a circular wheel, beating, dismemberment, and eventual burning."

"No... sorry, you misunderstood me. The wife is having an affair with the black man, who is sleeping with a goat behind her back. The government official is unaware, and heartbroken when he finds out..."

"Ah, my mistake... It would be execution for the woman along with seizure of property. Execution by breaking on the wheel for the 'negro' and slaughtering of the goat. And if the government official does not know, he isn't punished."

"... so if the wife was a man then, say, would she, I mean he, still be executed? Does it come down to gender?"

"Homosexuality is banned in The Armed Union. Thus, that theoretical subject is void, as should have been the one with the 'negro'."

"... and what if the goat was a victim of rape?"

"Animals cannot say yes or no for intercourse, thus, they cannot be raped."

"No. But they can bite... and sorry, you misunderstood me again. If the wife was really the husband, and the husband the wife, would the husband be executed for cheating on his wife? Or do only wives get executed for being a cheat..."

"...I am sorry, but I refuse to comment anymore on that vile subject. Next subject and next question."

"But it's a simple question. Would a man be executed for cheating on his wife?"

"Yes."

"Thankyou. Moving on, uh, what do you do in your spare time?"

"Well, I usually don't have much free time. But I usually spend it with my wife and son."

"So you don't read, or watch tv?"

"I read alot and watch television. They just aren't my central source of entertainment. My central source of enjoyment is spending time with my family and friends."

"What do you read/watch?"

"I usually read books by William Pierce or the Bible. I also tend to watch CNN--the Confederate News Network--along with movies and the like."

"Ah. CNN. Approximately 10 JRVians tune to that channel per year. Most people complain that its content is biased and simply untrue. What do you say to them?"

"Then I'd say, those 10 people need to be arrested for larceny. Considering decrypting of Confederate satellite channels is illegal and all, I'd suggest JRV arrest them. Next question."

"I see. Pornography and the media. What's your take on attractive young women, such as myself, posing in swimsuits and lingerie?"

"Pornography, I knew this would come up. Pornography is illegal in The Armed Union considering it breaks one of the seven deadly sins: lust."

"So you disagree with Mississippi on this issue?"

"Obviously."

"Obviously. But be honest, Czar. You like seeing women in revealing clothing..."

"My wife."

"Your wife? Where?"

"Did I mention homosexuality is illegal in The Armed Union? I think I did..."

"So people say that you are secretly homosexual..."

"Do you have their names? They must be from JRV."

"Moving on. The beard. What's with the beard?"

"What about it? My father had one like it. As do I. What of it? Any JRV criticism about it, hmm?"

"Well it doesn't seem fashionable. Do you follow fashion? I guess not..."

"And you do? Do you follow whatever MTV and television tells you? Obviously you do..."

"Yes, yes I do." She flicks back her hair.

"Happy for you Mrs. Petrie, but I am not here to watch you try and seduce and poison my camera-man. Please, next question and subject."

"Ok. Next question... you can have either an endless supply of voluptuous young lingerie models to tender your every need, or an RPG launcher and several black men to hunt down. Which do you choose? This is hypothetical, and let's say your wife doesn't exist..."

"Bah... Again with your worthless questions. I'd rather have the RPG launcher with 'negros' hunting me down. I know, for I put my trust in God, that'd I'd win."

"So you choose the men over the women? Czar Charles Hayden, thankyou for your time."

"You are welcome... Even though it was a bit... Unorthodox."

OOC: This was made by FC and JRV.

***
Conclusion: The Czar is gay.

OOC: This part of the post was made by JRV...
***
Fascist Confederacy
13-02-2005, 08:21
OOC: Yaaaaaaaaay!
Fascist Confederacy
13-02-2005, 08:26
Due to unorthodox lies posted about the Czar, the Directorate of Interior request that the JRVian government seize the copies of the transcripts and video recording be disposed of for their lies about the Czar. If this is not taken: consequences against the JRVian administration will be taken.

OOC: Consider this the downfall of our friendship.
VoteEarly
13-02-2005, 08:26
Conclusion: The Czar is gay.


"You are insulting a man I am related to, you will retract that statement and issue a public apology or I will use my private army to destroy your nation... My son and daughter-in-law may like your nation, but I sure as hell don't."

Curtis Fabus



Ooc- Curtis could get probably 10-15 million soldiers from various paramilitary units to do his bidding if he put out the call.
Fascist Confederacy
13-02-2005, 08:31
Heh.. I should of known a JRVian corporation would produce propaganda. I'am willing to retract by state of outrage if the JRV government file suit against the JBC for lies and illegally posting known lies. If this is not done, the JRVian administration can expect dire action to be taken.

Sincerely,
Czar Charles Hayden

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v521/Fascist_Confederacy/CoatOfArms.jpg
JRV
13-02-2005, 08:33
OOC: Any military action taken against JRV over this humorous news article, will not be acknowledged. It is a silly reason to declare war and it is quite unrealistic.

If you want to take some sort of action against JBC, whatever. It's not government owned or funded in anyway. But I'll ignore any military action against JRV.

I am perfectly with in my rights to ignore you both.
Fascist Confederacy
13-02-2005, 08:35
OOC: The following is the original transcript I allowed JRV to post, any alterations were made unlawfully except that to make it a television broadcast:

The following is an interview transcript that was taken from an interview between Czar Charles Hayden of The Union of Armed Dominions of Fascist Confederacy and one of the most famous JRVian journalists: Susan Petrie. The interview was published by JBC News. It was published as soon as possible to insure the inernational community with up-to-date information about The Highness.

OOC: Bold: Czar Charles Hayden; Normal: Susan Petrie; Italics from this point on = action.

"Hello your Highness, nice to be able to conduct this interview with you."

"Ah, hello Mrs. Petrie. I'a glad to be able to be here."

"Women are not treated equal in FC. There is no doubt about this. Why have you such a sexist outlook on life?"

"In the Bible, it states that a woman must not speak in church and the like. I also am a firm believer that women should stay home and raise the family and have no place in politics, business, and industry."

"The Bible also says that homosexuals should be executed. Do you agree with this?"

"Absolutely..."

"Do you allow your own wife to have a say in matters of importance?"

"She planned by birthday ball, did she not?" The Czar proceeds to laugh lightly, before stopping, and waiting for the next question.

Susan smiles. "But does she ever play apart in the running of the country?"

"In some minor things, yes. She seems to be my source for relaxation, thus, another reason women aren't allowed to do much. They should be a person the stressed, working man can come home to and share his thoughts and get out his pent up feelings on."

"So women should be 'trophy wives' to their husbands, would that be a fair enough way to put it?"

"I'm sensing some hostility... But if you must put it so bluntly: yes. They should be men's safe and unscaythed companions for all time."

She nodded. "What is your opinion on 'liberal Christians'?"

"You mean the people who say abortion is okay and homosexuality is alright aslong as it isn't their children? Burn them for heresy."

"I mean Christians who are tolerant. Tolerant of other religions and beliefs."

"Ah... People other than Reformed Protestants--Calvinists-- you mean? As Romans 11:7 states: "What then? Israel hath not obtained that which he seeketh for; but the election hath obtained it, and the rest were blinded." The other relgions and beliefs people follow are a fabrication made by the blind and ignorant. We are the Elect. Those chosen by God to be elevated to superiority."

"Ah ha..." Her voice trailed off. "What happens to non-Christians in your country?"

"Well, since it's illegal to pracitce anything other than Reformed Protestanism--Calvinism--in The Armed Union, what do you think happens? Not like it's unknown that that's a crime calling for capital punishment."

"Does this not conflict with the Bible, which also teaches love and compassion?"

"For his believers. The Bible tells of persecution and torture for the non-Elect."

"So the Bible conflicts with its own teachings then? Because there are a number of passages which do speak of tolerance and love..."

"I quote the Lord in Matthew 10:34: 'Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.'"

"So Jesus Christ came to cause bloodshed?"

"To his non-believers. It states in the Bible that some people were predestined for damnation aswell--yet the exact scripture illudes me."

"Does the sixth commandment not mean anything, then?"

"The sixth commandment is superceded in Numbers 25 when Phineas was zealous for God by killing an inter-racial couple for mating. After that, he was praised and blessed aswell as those who came after him: his family and his supporters."

"So God is a racist?"

"Putting it bluntly. And I'm guessing you're wondering if I take everything in the Bible litrally--and I do. To a degree. Not like I'm going to march around my enemies country and wait for their defense to fall."

"To a degree?"

"Yes, to a degree. As I stated: I don't think if I marched around a communist nation that their ICBM's would blow up and their SAM missiles launch down their own aircraft."

"What are the punishments for fornification and adultery in your nation?"

"Anything from public beating, to forced conscription into the military, to execution. All depends on the case."

"If the wife of a top government official, say, had sex with a gay black man, who in turn had slept with a goat, what would the outcome be?"

"Crude question... But the punishment of that would be... Let's see: Seizure of property, possible deportation of family, and execution."

"... and that would be for the wife? Or the negro? It's important that we clear that one up for our viewers."

"If the wife had knowledge of the fact that the government official was doing it: it would be execution and possibly the execution of her father if he knew of it and was still alive. And for the 'negro'--as you so kindly put it--would be public breaking by the wheel--execution by being tied to a circular wheel, beating, dismemberment, and eventual burning."

"No... sorry, you misunderstood me. The wife is having an affair with the black man, who is sleeping with a goat behind her back. The government official is unaware, and heartbroken when he finds out..."

"Ah, my mistake... It would be execution for the woman along with seizure of property. Execution by breaking on the wheel for the 'negro' and slaughtering of the goat. And if the government official does not know, he isn't punished."

"... so if the wife was a man then, say, would she, I mean he, still be executed? Does it come down to gender?"

"Homosexuality is banned in The Armed Union. Thus, that theoretical subject is void, as should have been the one with the 'negro'."

"... and what if the goat was a victim of rape?"

"Animals cannot say yes or no for intercourse, thus, they cannot be raped."

"No. But they can bite... and sorry, you misunderstood me again. If the wife was really the husband, and the husband the wife, would the husband be executed for cheating on his wife? Or do only wives get executed for being a cheat..."

"...I am sorry, but I refuse to comment anymore on that vile subject. Next subject and next question."

"But it's a simple question. Would a man be executed for cheating on his wife?"

"Yes."

"Thankyou. Moving on, uh, what do you do in your spare time?"

"Well, I usually don't have much free time. But I usually spend it with my wife and son."

"So you don't read, or watch tv?"

"I read alot and watch television. They just aren't my central source of entertainment. My central source of enjoyment is spending time with my family and friends."

"What do you read/watch?"

"I usually read books by William Pierce or the Bible. I also tend to watch CNN--the Confederate News Network--along with movies and the like."

"Ah. CNN. Approximately 10 JRVians tune to that channel per year. Most people complain that its content is biased and simply untrue. What do you say to them?"

"Then I'd say, those 10 people need to be arrested for larceny. Considering decrypting of Confederate satellite channels is illegal and all, I'd suggest JRV arrest them. Next question."

"I see. Pornography and the media. What's your take on attractive young women, such as myself, posing in swimsuits and lingerie?"

"Pornography, I knew this would come up. Pornography is illegal in The Armed Union considering it breaks one of the seven deadly sins: lust."

"So you disagree with Mississippi on this issue?"

"Obviously."

"Obviously. But be honest, Czar. You like seeing women in revealing clothing..."

"My wife."

"Your wife? Where?"

"Did I mention homosexuality is illegal in The Armed Union? I think I did..."

"So people say that you are secretly homosexual..."

"Do you have their names? They must be from JRV."

"Moving on. The beard. What's with the beard?"

"What about it? My father had one like it. As do I. What of it? Any JRV criticism about it, hmm?"

"Well it doesn't seem fashionable. Do you follow fashion? I guess not..."

"And you do? Do you follow whatever MTV and television tells you? Obviously you do..."

"Yes, yes I do." She flicks back her hair.

"Happy for you Mrs. Petrie, but I'am not here to watch you try and seduce and poison my camera-man. Please, next question and subject."

"Ok. Next question... you can have either an endless supply of voluptuous young lingerie models to tender your every need, or an RPG launcher and several black men to hunt down. Which do you choose? This is hypothetical, and let's say your wife doesn't exist..."

"Bah... Again with your worthless questions. I'd rather have the RPG launcher with 'negros' hunting me down. I know, for I put my trust in God, that'd I'd win."

"Czar Charles Hayden, thankyou for your time."

"You are welcome... Even though it was a bit.. Unorthodox."

OOC: This was made by FC and JRV.
Bictor Land
13-02-2005, 08:49
I have aired this television broadcast in Bictor Land's HBO program as a special edition. It was ranked 2nd most hilarious show! Now the media is rich and prosperous thanks to you.
-Bictor (^_^)
Romandeos
13-02-2005, 08:59
OOC: Any military action taken against JRV over this humorous news article, will not be acknowledged. It is a silly reason to declare war and it is quite unrealistic.

If you want to take some sort of action against JBC, whatever. It's not government owned or funded in anyway. But I'll ignore any military action against JRV.

I am perfectly with in my rights to ignore you both.

OOC: Actually, lots of wars have been started over far lesser subjects IRL. I just thought I should say that.
VoteEarly
13-02-2005, 09:01
OOC: Any military action taken against JRV over this humorous news article, will not be acknowledged. It is a silly reason to declare war and it is quite unrealistic.

If you want to take some sort of action against JBC, whatever. It's not government owned or funded in anyway. But I'll ignore any military action against JRV.

I am perfectly with in my rights to ignore you both.


Ooc- Perhaps, but there is a thing called bluffing/bullying, Curtis loves to do that. Just apologize for the media remarks, and meet the rest of our demands, and then we're good to go. :)
Fascist Confederacy
13-02-2005, 09:06
Six PM. A UCarry truck rolled up into the rear enterance of JBC in Victoria. Tabloids littered the floor with Susan Petrie's face on it declaring the Czar of The Armed Union was homosexually inclined. Several Hayden sympathizers in JRV didn't much agree with this, and thus decided to take action. Though they weren't part of an officially backed faction from The Armed Union, they were merely concerned citizen of JRV tired of the JBC portraying any person they interviewed as a homosexual or a transvestite. Thus, they grew tired of the lies, and decided to take action.

A guard walked up to the man as he stepped from the UCarry truck, "Sir, I'm-" he was interrupted by the man slamming his fist into the guards face. A splattering affect of torn tissue and vermillion hues scattered across the floor. Another guard came running towards the man. He began to draw his pistol when the activist withdrew a .38 from his denim coat. The activist fired one round into the guards gut, crippling him instantly. The shot from the guards weapon tore into the activists upper shoulder, causing him to cringe. As the JBCian guard lie on the floor grasping and gurggling on his own bodily fluids, he had enough life to call to the security outpost. Guards would be coming any minute.

The activist watched as he called to dispatch, then expired. The man walked back to the UCarry truck and started the engine. The diseal gave a grumblign roar as he puled it up next to a center piling in the one-story down basement. He removed himself from the cab, and quickly ran to the rear. He elevated the door to the storage area and looked inside. He saw the barrels of ammonium nitrate packed to the very back, making it almost impossible to close the door. He reached for the considerabbly long fuse and cut it down to only a centimeter in length. He heard as the guards skid on the soles of their boots. He heard the gun fire in unicen as his lighter flashed, lighting the fuse. The 'terrorist' fell to the floor, his lighter falling beside his hand. Crimson streams trickled down from his forhead. The guards made it half-way to him before it blew...

Cement shattered like glass out into the streets. Plumes of towering smoke and dust filled the sky as the JBC building toppled onto its nearby archive storage stations. Screams were heard as JBC employees leaped from the upper stories, only to be splattered against the pavement. A younger woman hit the pavement by a police officer. He ran to her, turning her obviously lifeless corpse over: it was Susan Petrie. Half of her face had been charred by the inferno, but it was her. Roughly two thousand JBC employees perished in either the fire, the bomb itself, or the caving of the building.

Word of the incident eventually made it to the Czar in Der Vaterland. He was shocked and sent his condolences to the families of those who perished in the tragedy. He also sent word to the JRVian government formally stating that they had nothing to do with the attack. They also donated C$3,000 to the relief fund. But this wasn't the end of the attacks...

* * * * * *

Ten PM three women walked quickly to two warehouses outside a smaller city around one hundred miles away from Victoria. The location was of the JBC National Archives. Each woman quickly made enterence into the buildings by seducing the rather old and swarthy guards, only to snap their necks or slit their throats in the flails of passion. Each woman made their way to one of the two buidings. One was occupied by two women (A to H) and the other (I-Z) by one. To each women's abdomens were rigged roughy fourty pounds of C-4 explosives and shrapnel. At around Eleven PM, the three women pulled the small pens out of their belts, allowing the plastic explosives to electrically ignite. Ball berrings, nails, and the like tore through the buildings as the explosive shockwaves allowed them to topple. Fires tore through the electronic and physical databases, destroying all but the archives of the Z's, but even they were badly damaged.

C$1,500 of The Armed Union's donations went to the families of those who perished in the warhouse attacks.

OOC: The attack was known to occur by JRV and thus allowed.
JRV
15-02-2005, 04:56
Bumb.

OOC: Lovely post. But a) 17:00 HRS marks the end of JRV's official working day b) Susan Petrie is a reporter, the HQ building is just for central management etc. You may have killed the CEO and a few other top men and women, but not Petrie. Studios/news centres are located elsewhere in various parts of the country and reporters generally hang out at them, c) 2000 people, don't count on it. I don't think 2000 people would be working there at one time, especially not after 6 PM.

You should have asked for the details first.
JRV
15-02-2005, 04:59
… oh and JBC doesn’t have a national archive centre. Archives are just stored in studios, which like I say, are everywhere. There is however, a JRVian National Archive Centre, but that is government owned and operated.