Lachenburg
25-12-2004, 04:26
Uber Ehrfürchtige News Network- UENN
* Camera swivels around to show anchorman Bob Gortenburinar shuffling his papers*
Good Evening, Ladies and Gentleman, I’m Bob Gortenburinar. Tonights top story is a harrowing tale of death and destruction, as almost 2,000 Liberal Extremists committed mass suicide on the steps of our own Parliament Building.
This horrible episode was prompted by Parliaments decision to deny the Liberal Extremist Cult, The Freedom Liberation Movement tax exemption status. As you may know, this cult has been working towards becoming a religion for almost 20 years now, but has been turned down from tax-exemption status 4 times in a row.
Now it seems as if this was the final straw, for shortly after the declination was heard, LEC leader Max Gorbosceh proclaimed to his people that “ We will show these Fascist dogs that they cannot ignore our destiny any longer!”
Soon, thousands of these fanatics were marching through the streets of our beloved Kalzenburg, shouting revolutionary slogans and spreading their propaganda to a skeptical crowd of on-lookers. Finally, at the steps of parliament, these fanatics revealed their tool of death: Kool-Aid, laced with rat poison. After several agonizing moments of mass vomiting and cries, the entire group was dead.
Now clean-up crews are working feverishly to dispose of the bodies, before the ominous stench of death clouds the city streets. Many citizens have offered to held the fatigued workers and it seems as if the bodies will be cleared by tomorrow.
In other news...
* Camera swivels around to show anchorman Bob Gortenburinar shuffling his papers*
Good Evening, Ladies and Gentleman, I’m Bob Gortenburinar. Tonights top story is a harrowing tale of death and destruction, as almost 2,000 Liberal Extremists committed mass suicide on the steps of our own Parliament Building.
This horrible episode was prompted by Parliaments decision to deny the Liberal Extremist Cult, The Freedom Liberation Movement tax exemption status. As you may know, this cult has been working towards becoming a religion for almost 20 years now, but has been turned down from tax-exemption status 4 times in a row.
Now it seems as if this was the final straw, for shortly after the declination was heard, LEC leader Max Gorbosceh proclaimed to his people that “ We will show these Fascist dogs that they cannot ignore our destiny any longer!”
Soon, thousands of these fanatics were marching through the streets of our beloved Kalzenburg, shouting revolutionary slogans and spreading their propaganda to a skeptical crowd of on-lookers. Finally, at the steps of parliament, these fanatics revealed their tool of death: Kool-Aid, laced with rat poison. After several agonizing moments of mass vomiting and cries, the entire group was dead.
Now clean-up crews are working feverishly to dispose of the bodies, before the ominous stench of death clouds the city streets. Many citizens have offered to held the fatigued workers and it seems as if the bodies will be cleared by tomorrow.
In other news...