NationStates Jolt Archive

We've all met people we don't like. School bus bullies. Pain-in-the-ass in-laws. Stingy lawyers. Corrupt politicians. Bothersome opposition parties. Annoying kids trying to sell you cookies that taste like deep-fried whale waste. Aren't you tired of having to tolerate these annoyances? Of course you are! Would you be willing to pay a modest fee to have these annoyances terminated? Of course you would! You, my fine young friend, have come to just the right place: Roach-Busters Extermination Squad For Hire!* Here at RBESH, we are all about you, and the customer, and doing everything conceivable to make you, the customer, 100% satisfied. You know you're unhappy. You know you can't find happiness unless certain people in your lives 'disappear.' That's where we come in! Just call toll-free 1-800-KILL-4-ME today! Satisfaction is guaranteed!!!!!


-Barry Paneful, Founder and President of RBESH
http://www.geocities.com/mr_whud/_264094_savim300.jpg




*This organization is in no way affiliated with the government of the Indestructible Superpower of Roach-Busters

We also specialize in guerrilla warfare, and have hundreds of highly-disciplined, iron-willed, battle-hardened, ruthlessly efficient mercenaries for hire. Their skills are second to none.


-Barry Paneful, Founder and President of RBESH
http://www.geocities.com/mr_whud/_264094_savim300.jpg

Secret Message:

From Interior Minister Dariush Savhadkohi:

We have some need for an assasin to eliminate several people. The communist movement is growing rapidly and we feel now is the time to act. With that in mind, Shah Khosru would like you to kill 300 suspected Communist leaders and destroy 25 Communist newspaper printers. We are not willing to take direct action for fear of reprocussions by Communist nations. As such, though our more secretive branches of SAVAK will be assisting your guys, we will try and stay as detached as possible.

-Thank you.

Secret Message:

From Interior Minister Dariush Savhadkohi:

We have some need for an assasin to eliminate several people. The communist movement is growing rapidly and we feel now is the time to act. With that in mind, Shah Khosru would like you to kill 300 suspected Communist leaders and destroy 25 Communist newspaper printers. We are not willing to take direct action for fear of reprocussions by Communist nations. As such, though our more secretive branches of SAVAK will be assisting your guys, we will try and stay as detached as possible.

-Thank you.

Secret IC


To: Interior Minister Dariush Savhadkohi
From: Barry Paneful

Because you are a great ally of my country- and because I loathe communists vehemently- the total sum is $250. However, because we are just starting out, we ask that you assist us in covering the costs of flying to your nation, if it is not too much trouble.

bump

bump

RBESH Military Forces

10,000 assassins
15,000 guerrilla mercenaries
500 M82A3 Sniper Rifles
750 M-214 Microguns
500 M-134 Miniguns
100 MG-15 15.5mm Heavy Machine Guns
1,000 M-69 Schwarzenegger Grenader, 40mm auto GLs
5,000 Mk 47 P&R Medusa 8 shot Multi-Caliber Revolvers
2,500 PHX Hi-Power 10mm Pistols
2,500 PHX Desert Fox Pistols
1,500 MP-7 Personal Defese Weapon/SMGs
800 M101 Super-Nova Shotguns
1,200 M102 Street Cleaner Shotguns
1,000 M-12 MasterKey Double Barrled Shotguns
500 CAR-22 Combat Assault Rifles
250 MG-22 Squad Automatic Weapon/Light Machine-Guns
10 AH-1A1 SuperCobra II helicopters
25 AH-3 Viper Light Attack Helicopters
10 AH-4 Zealot Light Attack/Observation Helicopters
5 CH-54B "Skycrane" Cargo Helicopters (cargo pod version)
10 SH-65A "Dolphin" ASW/Utility Helicopters
100 T-1 Scorpion Main Battle Tanks
1,000 Chevy 750 Technical trucks (w/crew cab)
2 M201 Towed 200mm Howitzers

Dum de dum dum dum...

SIC:

Hi, a competitor to Nutropinian Private Airplane Dealer LLC has cropped up in Nutropinia. We need you to go in and destroy the factory. As I am also the ruler of the country we will set it up so that the response teams get 'stuck in traffic' during the attack. The factory and offices are on a 300 acre site with its own runway. Level the place to the ground and kill everyone. We cannot do this ourselves as we are an extremely capitalistic nation but it threatens my business. We will pay whatever you require, please also outline the size of the force you will be using.

Dictator Paul 'The Mad' Silver

We have need for you to assassinate a rival Girl Scout Troop. We here at Troop 3456 have been beaten every year for the past twelve years in a cookie bake-off and sell-off. They are Troop 1292.

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

SIC:

Hi, a competitor to Nutropinian Private Airplane Dealer LLC has cropped up in Nutropinia. We need you to go in and destroy the factory. As I am also the ruler of the country we will set it up so that the response teams get 'stuck in traffic' during the attack. The factory and offices are on a 300 acre site with its own runway. Level the place to the ground and kill everyone. We cannot do this ourselves as we are an extremely capitalistic nation but it threatens my business. We will pay whatever you require, please also outline the size of the force you will be using.

Dictator Paul 'The Mad' Silver

To: Dictator Paul 'The Mad' Silver
From: Barry Paneful

We will send:

100 assassins (armed with M82A3 Sniper Rifles)
15 guerrilla mercenaries (armed with PHX Desert Fox Pistols)
2 AH-1A1 SuperCobra II helicopters
2 AH-3 Viper Light Attack Helicopters
15 T-1 Scorpion Main Battle Tanks
20 Chevy 750 Technical trucks (w/crew cab)
1 M201 Towed 200mm Howitzer

We charge $150 per person we kill...normally. However, because you are an ally, we will slash the price to $75 for every two people we kill. Oh yeah, blowing the place to smithereens will cost $200. The forces will be sent as soon as you give us an estimate as to how many people we have to kill.

We have need for you to assassinate a rival Girl Scout Troop. We here at Troop 3456 have been beaten every year for the past twelve years in a cookie bake-off and sell-off. They are Troop 1292.

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

To: Troop Mother Dara Haniels
From: Barry Paneful

How many troops are there in the rival troop?

[OOC -- Long time no see! The forums have really changed, I barely know any of the nations. Any new Sperioths? Does he still role play? Does anyone still remember him? I will be active over Christmas break, maybe we can finally finish off the rift between our nations once and for all, even if it means war! Or peace, you know, whatever works!]

250 girls including the Troop Mothers.

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

[OOC -- Long time no see! The forums have really changed, I barely know any of the nations. Any new Sperioths? Does he still role play? Does anyone still remember him? I will be active over Christmas break, maybe we can finally finish off the rift between our nations once and for all, even if it means war! Or peace, you know, whatever works!]

OOC: Hello, Grenval! How ya been? ;) I hope that, whatever happens between our nations IRL, we can be friends OOC.

Probably around 500.

250 girls including the Troop Mothers.

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

To: Dara Haniels
From: Barry Paneful

That will be $37,500 dollars, please. We shall return with their heads shortly.

Probably around 500.

Very well. I will send the afore-mentioned forces shortly. Expect them in a few (NS, not RL) days.

-Barry Paneful

OOC: Hello, Grenval! How ya been? ;) I hope that, whatever happens between our nations IRL, we can be friends OOC.

OOC -- Always!

OOC -- Always!

OOC: Thanks! :)

Thank you. We'll win that bake sale this year!

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

Thank you. We'll win that bake sale this year!

Troop Mother Dara Haniels

Fake Pre-Bake Sale, Capital City of Camel Eaters

RBESH men had spent hours putting up posters and giving out fliers advertising a fake bake sale. They had been careful to give them only to the designated girl scouts and their affiliates, so as to avoid bumping off the wrong people. The results were, of course, a resounding success. Every one of the girls and their mothers showed up right on time.
RBESH president and founder, Barry Paneful, disguised as a Troop Mother, said, "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the last night of your lives!"
As the troops and their mothers looked around, confused, RBESH men sprayed heavy does of a paralysis-inducing gas which rendered the women and girls immobile. They could still feel the pain, but could not move. The RBESH men then pulled an enormous gymnasium-sized vat filled with boiling water, scooped up all the girls and women with cranes, and dumped them into the vat. A few hours later, their bodies were removed, skinned, and chopped up, and their heads were individually gift-wrapped and mailed to Troop Mother Dara Haniels.

Thank you.

Rival Private Airline Company, Nutropinia

In one of the offices, a tall, lanky, pencil-thin, dweeby geek wearing an orange suit with purple polka dots, a yellow and green striped tie, horn-rimmed glasses more than twice as thick as Woody Allen's, and enormous clown shoes, went over the sale figures in a shrill, grating, nasal voice. "Hyello, everyone. These are our syale fyigures. This year we sold..." He ranted on and on, while showing facts and figures from pie graphs.
"Save those graphs...we'll need them to record the statistics of your deaths!" a grim, extremely deep, malevolent voice bellowed over the intercom.
"What the hyeck?" the dweeby geek exclaimed, awe-struck.
Suddenly, the wall tumbled down before a barrage of fire, as hundreds of commandoes stormed into the room, pummeling them all with lead. Seconds later, the corpses were all stacked up and cremated. Tanks blasted the building to rubble, which was further demolished by air strikes.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

-Barry Paneful

Sweet.

Money Wired.

Secret Message:

From Interior Minister Dariush Savhadkohi:

We have some need for an assasin to eliminate several people. The communist movement is growing rapidly and we feel now is the time to act. With that in mind, Shah Khosru would like you to kill 300 suspected Communist leaders and destroy 25 Communist newspaper printers. We are not willing to take direct action for fear of reprocussions by Communist nations. As such, though our more secretive branches of SAVAK will be assisting your guys, we will try and stay as detached as possible.

-Thank you.

The pinkoes were, as usual, babbling endlessly about the proletariat (yawn), the revolution (who gives a damn), workers' rights (yadda-yadda), and other Marxist-Leninist crap, which nobody gave a hoot about. Well, that's what they were doing. Rapid gun-fire, a few air strikes, and a quick dousing off by flame-throwers ended the idle conversation. 25 communists survived. They promptly had their heads bashed in by their newspaper printers; both the printers and the commies' heads fractured to pieces with the force of the impact.

Thank you so much. Have a fruit cake. And the money of course.

Dara Haniels

Sweet.

Money Wired.

Barry Paneful pocketed the money, and shook the Dictator's hand gracefully. "Thank you, sir," he said, saluting him. "If ever my organization can be of any service in the future, please give me a call." He handed the dictator his business card.

Thank you so much. Have a fruit cake. And the money of course.

Dara Haniels

Barry Paneful began ravenously stuffing his face, swallowing large mouthfuls without chewing. He loved fruitcake. His men, tired and hungry, whimpered like puppies. "Back off, you damn mooches," Paneful muttered. "You're not getting any!"

He turned to Mrs. Haniels. "Oh yeah, thanks for the cake and the money."

Anyone else want us to bump someone off?

-Barry Paneful

"No big deal. You know there was this man who grabbed my ass on the way in. In fact I think it was you. if you'd be willing to...... do a job for free I could make it worth your while."

OOC: Dude she's a MILF.

"No big deal. You know there was this man who grabbed my ass on the way in. In fact I think it was you. if you'd be willing to...... do a job for free I could make it worth your while."

OOC: Dude she's a MILF.

Paneful shook his head. "Sorry, babe. I'm a married gent. Most o' my men aren't though." He winked and then nodded in the direction of his men, who began growling, purring, whistling, and making cat calls as they walked over to her.

OOC: She's a what? :confused:

bump

(OOC: Holy crap, I posted over a hundred times in one day! :eek: )

Fr:: Princess Sheenako of The Principality of Mayham Naja

Dear Barry Paneful,
I have reviewed your work and have decided to hire you on to take out a nuisance of mine. This woman has been parading around court as if she runs the joint and has made several private threats to me about taking my place as the Presidential Royal Chair. To make things worse, she is to marry my brother in three weeks. One would think that if I were to suffer pain death that HE would take my place, but he has a few mental disorders that obstruct him from taking any government status; thus, if I died, then HIS WIFE would be running things, AND THIS BITCH IS PISSING ME OFF! :headbang: Worse, I believe she'll fuck our system up. I beg of you, please kill her. Just a single bullet will due, a nice snipe in the skull :sniper:
I will be hosting a ball at the end of the week at three o'clock in the afternoon. She will be announced as Lady Zillia and will enter the main thrown room without escort through the main doors (the REALLY big ones). She's blonde and cheeky and believes that this ball is to honour her (hence she's entering alone for "dramatization" ).
Enclosed is a picture for better reference, a key card, and a military uniform. As long as s/he wears the uniform, the sniper may carry a case with the gun inside it (will have trouble getting in if gun is carried in the open). Please have the sniper arrive five minutes after the ball begins and go through the west entrance. A short man in a tux and a tall woman in the same military uniform as enclosed will take the sniper to a nice, secluded, shaded area on the second floor at a balcony facing the main doors. S/he will have a perfect shot from there. Once Zillia is dead the man and woman your sniper entered with will make sure s/he gets back to where s/he needs to be safely without any problems.
Thank you very much.
P.S. I will award an extra $500 if the sniper shoots her when she grins at the news cameras :D
Again, thank you very much.

Paneful shook his head. "Sorry, babe. I'm a married gent. Most o' my men aren't though." He winked and then nodded in the direction of his men, who began growling, purring, whistling, and making cat calls as they walked over to her.

OOC: She's a what? :confused:
Okay she said to the assorted men. If you do a job for free I'll reward you graciously.

OOC: Mother I'd Like To Fuck

Secret Transmission:

That will be no problem. Any costs will be paid for.

Secret Transmission:

That will be no problem. Any costs will be paid for.

Thanks, but I already RP'd the commies getting killed on page 2. Therefore, we covered the costs. ;)

Fr:: Princess Sheenako of The Principality of Mayham Naja

Dear Barry Paneful,
I have reviewed your work and have decided to hire you on to take out a nuisance of mine. This woman has been parading around court as if she runs the joint and has made several private threats to me about taking my place as the Presidential Royal Chair. To make things worse, she is to marry my brother in three weeks. One would think that if I were to suffer pain death that HE would take my place, but he has a few mental disorders that obstruct him from taking any government status; thus, if I died, then HIS WIFE would be running things, AND THIS BITCH IS PISSING ME OFF! :headbang: Worse, I believe she'll fuck our system up. I beg of you, please kill her. Just a single bullet will due, a nice snipe in the skull :sniper:
I will be hosting a ball at the end of the week at three o'clock in the afternoon. She will be announced as Lady Zillia and will enter the main thrown room without escort through the main doors (the REALLY big ones). She's blonde and cheeky and believes that this ball is to honour her (hence she's entering alone for "dramatization" ).
Enclosed is a picture for better reference, a key card, and a military uniform. As long as s/he wears the uniform, the sniper may carry a case with the gun inside it (will have trouble getting in if gun is carried in the open). Please have the sniper arrive five minutes after the ball begins and go through the west entrance. A short man in a tux and a tall woman in the same military uniform as enclosed will take the sniper to a nice, secluded, shaded area on the second floor at a balcony facing the main doors. S/he will have a perfect shot from there. Once Zillia is dead the man and woman your sniper entered with will make sure s/he gets back to where s/he needs to be safely without any problems.
Thank you very much.
P.S. I will award an extra $500 if the sniper shoots her when she grins at the news cameras :D
Again, thank you very much.

To: Princess Sheenako
From: Barry Paneful

No sweat. I'll be happy to do it. This b to the i to the t to the c to the h is goin' down!

Fr:: Princess Sheenako of The Principality of Mayham Naja

Dear Barry Paneful,
I have reviewed your work and have decided to hire you on to take out a nuisance of mine. This woman has been parading around court as if she runs the joint and has made several private threats to me about taking my place as the Presidential Royal Chair. To make things worse, she is to marry my brother in three weeks. One would think that if I were to suffer pain death that HE would take my place, but he has a few mental disorders that obstruct him from taking any government status; thus, if I died, then HIS WIFE would be running things, AND THIS BITCH IS PISSING ME OFF! :headbang: Worse, I believe she'll fuck our system up. I beg of you, please kill her. Just a single bullet will due, a nice snipe in the skull :sniper:
I will be hosting a ball at the end of the week at three o'clock in the afternoon. She will be announced as Lady Zillia and will enter the main thrown room without escort through the main doors (the REALLY big ones). She's blonde and cheeky and believes that this ball is to honour her (hence she's entering alone for "dramatization" ).
Enclosed is a picture for better reference, a key card, and a military uniform. As long as s/he wears the uniform, the sniper may carry a case with the gun inside it (will have trouble getting in if gun is carried in the open). Please have the sniper arrive five minutes after the ball begins and go through the west entrance. A short man in a tux and a tall woman in the same military uniform as enclosed will take the sniper to a nice, secluded, shaded area on the second floor at a balcony facing the main doors. S/he will have a perfect shot from there. Once Zillia is dead the man and woman your sniper entered with will make sure s/he gets back to where s/he needs to be safely without any problems.
Thank you very much.
P.S. I will award an extra $500 if the sniper shoots her when she grins at the news cameras :D
Again, thank you very much.

(OOC: Please TG me when you're ready.)

To quote Doom: "bumpage"

(OOC: Please TG me when you're ready.)

(OOC: * :( feels most utterly stupid* I want to guess TG means telegram....am I right or wrong?? :headbang: damn, I hate being new to forums!)

(OOC: * :( feels most utterly stupid* I want to guess TG means telegram....am I right or wrong?? :headbang: damn, I hate being new to forums!)

You are right.

OOC: We'd like to take this time to say that these aren't the ONLY bounty hunters in the crowd. Try here too:

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=381801

Especially if you are a cheaper nation.

Yes, we need you to eliminate a man by the name of J.L. who is the president of a certain pesky nation we have had dealings with....

President Jack Kordo II

ooc: ;) Just kidding RB! I have nothing against you or your nation.

The pinkoes were, as usual, babbling endlessly about the proletariat (yawn), the revolution (who gives a damn), workers' rights (yadda-yadda), and other Marxist-Leninist crap, which nobody gave a hoot about. Well, that's what they were doing. Rapid gun-fire, a few air strikes, and a quick dousing off by flame-throwers ended the idle conversation. 25 communists survived. They promptly had their heads bashed in by their newspaper printers; both the printers and the commies' heads fractured to pieces with the force of the impact.

Excellent, please wire me an invoice of expenses and I'll have my subordinates pay you.

-Shah Khosru III

You are right.


OOC:: yay! :)

Excellent, please wire me an invoice of expenses and I'll have my subordinates pay you.

-Shah Khosru III

Actually, I thought of a far greater reward than money. May I have the honor of meeting the Shah, and getting his autograph?

-Barry Paneful

OOC: We'd like to take this time to say that these aren't the ONLY bounty hunters in the crowd. Try here too:

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=381801

Especially if you are a cheaper nation.

Our skills are second to none. No bounty hunters on earth rival us.

-Barry Paneful

Secret Transmission: Unique Encryption Sequence

Target: Damien Dreadfire
Price: $1 billion USD upon completion and independent confirmation

Do you accept?

-END-

Secret Transmission: Unique Encryption Sequence

Target: Damien Dreadfire
Price: $1 billion USD upon completion and independent confirmation

Do you accept?

-END-

I shall return with his head shortly.

-Barry Paneful

bumpers

OOC: I think you are going to get Ignored or murdered by AMF. More likely destroyed.

Paneful entered Damien Dreadfire's bedroom, garbed in a loose, heavy, black hooded cloak. He sneaked up behind Dreadfire and whispered, "Hello, Mr. Deadfire."
Dreadfire turned around. "It's Dreadf-"
"Not anymore."
Paneful thrust a plastic knife into the center of Dreadfire's neck with such force that the tip of it protruded from the other size. As blood drizzled onto the wall, Dreadfire slumped to the floor, now a corpse.

ooc:
Well - first off - you didn't actually kill the leader of Automagfreek - you just wrote a funny little story.

If you want to be a "wet-work" nation - then you have to RP out your attacks.

Should you wish to continue in this line of work - I suggest you start a new thread to address the issue of trying to assasinate the leader of one of the most violent nations in this game.

The billion dollars is still up for grabs.

Good luck.

ooc:
Well - first off - you didn't actually kill the leader of Automagfreak - you just wrote a funny little story.

If you want to be a "wet-work" nation - then you have to RP out your attacks.

Should you wish to continue in this line of work - I suggest you start a new thread to address the issue of trying to assasinate the leader of one of the most violent nations in this game.

The billion dollars is still up for grabs.

Good luck.

Lol, sorry, didn't know he was a national leader. I thought he was just some random guy you made up. My bad. :(

Lol, sorry, didn't know he was a national leader. I thought he was just some random guy you made up. My bad. :(

That's fine. You still taking the contract?

That's fine. You still taking the contract?

Yes.

-Barry Paneful

I will pay $900 million to destroy Hartaria

I will pay $900 million to destroy Hartaria

We do not have nearly enough men, weapons, or equipment to destroy an entire nation. Please select a more realistic target.

-Barry Paneful

We do not have nearly enough men, weapons, or equipment to destroy an entire nation. Please select a more realistic target.

-Barry Paneful

I will pay for the weapons and everything.

I will pay for the weapons and everything.

We'll do our best. Better yet, why not work together?

-Barry Paneful

We'll do our best. Better yet, why not work together?

-Barry Paneful


Okay, but Hartaria keeps Godmoding in a civil War i am in. We can both destroy him.

Okay, but Hartaria keeps Godmoding in a civil War i am in. We can both destroy him.

That would be adequate.

-Barry Paneful

That would be adequate.

-Barry Paneful

We can both destroy him. hahaha! What weapons would you need.

We can both destroy him. hahaha! What weapons would you need.

That depends. What type of nation (future, modern-tech, etc.) is he?

-Barry Paneful

That depends. What type of nation (future, modern-tech, etc.) is he?

-Barry Paneful

He is modern tech using godmoding techniques

He is modern tech using godmoding techniques

I recommend we use the IGNORE cannon against him. Works every time.

-Barry Paneful

I recommend we use the IGNORE cannon against him. Works every time.

-Barry Paneful

I may have been here a long time, but what the hell is an IGNORE cannon?

Paneful entered Damien Dreadfire's bedroom, garbed in a loose, heavy, black hooded cloak. He sneaked up behind Dreadfire and whispered, "Hello, Mr. Deadfire."
Dreadfire turned around. "It's Dreadf-"
"Not anymore."
Paneful thrust a plastic knife into the center of Dreadfire's neck with such force that the tip of it protruded from the other size. As blood drizzled onto the wall, Dreadfire slumped to the floor, now a corpse.

OOC: Uh huh. :rolleyes:

OOC: Uh huh. :rolleyes:

When he asked me to kill 'Damien Dreadfire,' I thought it was just a random person he made up. (Hence, the reason I deleted that post.) My bad.

So from now on if anyone wants me to kill someone, for Christ's sake, say who the person is first.

-Barry Paneful

bump

OOC:: damn... apparently some people are picky. I just made someone up for the fun. Speaking of which, when you going to kll her?? Need me to change some things around so the whole situation flows??

OOC:: damn... apparently some people are picky. I just made someone up for the fun. Speaking of which, when you going to kll her?? Need me to change some things around so the whole situation flows??

I'll kill her as soon as you are ready.

-Barry Paneful

I'll kill her as soon as you are ready.

-Barry Paneful

Everything's good to go, Mr. Paneful. Let's get your sniper situated. :sniper:

Fr:: Princess Sheenako of The Principality of Mayham Naja

Dear Barry Paneful,
I have reviewed your work and have decided to hire you on to take out a nuisance of mine. This woman has been parading around court as if she runs the joint and has made several private threats to me about taking my place as the Presidential Royal Chair. To make things worse, she is to marry my brother in three weeks. One would think that if I were to suffer pain death that HE would take my place, but he has a few mental disorders that obstruct him from taking any government status; thus, if I died, then HIS WIFE would be running things, AND THIS BITCH IS PISSING ME OFF! :headbang: Worse, I believe she'll fuck our system up. I beg of you, please kill her. Just a single bullet will due, a nice snipe in the skull :sniper:
I will be hosting a ball at the end of the week at three o'clock in the afternoon. She will be announced as Lady Zillia and will enter the main thrown room without escort through the main doors (the REALLY big ones). She's blonde and cheeky and believes that this ball is to honour her (hence she's entering alone for "dramatization" ).
Enclosed is a picture for better reference, a key card, and a military uniform. As long as s/he wears the uniform, the sniper may carry a case with the gun inside it (will have trouble getting in if gun is carried in the open). Please have the sniper arrive five minutes after the ball begins and go through the west entrance. A short man in a tux and a tall woman in the same military uniform as enclosed will take the sniper to a nice, secluded, shaded area on the second floor at a balcony facing the main doors. S/he will have a perfect shot from there. Once Zillia is dead the man and woman your sniper entered with will make sure s/he gets back to where s/he needs to be safely without any problems.
Thank you very much.
P.S. I will award an extra $500 if the sniper shoots her when she grins at the news cameras :D
Again, thank you very much.

To: Princess Sheenako
From: Barry Paneful

The sniper is on his way to Mayham Naja via helicopter right now. Expect him within a few hours.

*at west entrance of palace*

*short man looks up in the sky and back at his watch*

*woman in military uniform leans against a wall and lights a cigerette*
*addresses short man*
"For Christ's sake, the whole shin-dig hasn't even started yet! Stop getting antsy or you'll blow the cover! *mumbles* moron... :rolleyes: "

"But what if everything goes wrong!! :eek: "

"It won't. So long as you SHUT-UP."

*both continue to wait*