NationStates Jolt Archive


Upper Xen announces "We have the Headcrab Bomb"

Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 22:14
Hong Kong (XNS)- Today, at a Press Conference, this announcement was posted by Admiral Mai Nomura of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and Deputy Secretary of Defense, announcing the public unveiling and open funding of Project Ravenholm, the quest to build a Headcrab-based munition.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of Upper Xen, the world-

Headcrabs. The very name conjures images of fear, terror, and devastation, brought about by in both physical and psychological form by the effects that they have on human beings. Introduced by the Great Lord Nihilanth after he conquered all of the lands of Japan and China in the 1200's partly as a weapon of terror and partly by accident, they are alternatively symbols of oppression and a living plague, taking human beings and turning them into ravenous creatures, and feasting on our crops and our livestock greediliy like common rats.

Now, however, we have redeemed these creatures. We have turned them to a higher goal. After extensive testing in the Xinjiang region against Uygur fundamentalist rebels and on violent offenders that were truly unreformable by means of psychological and hard-labor rehabilitation, we can now safely turn them against the human terrors that lurk among us: tyrants, terrorists, and those who would threaten the rights of man, wherever they would be.

Project Ravenholm, the project to create this weapon, has bore fruit. That fruit will now feed and nourish those who support liberty, the rights of man, and law and order, and poison the tyrants and terrormongers of the world that would threaten the peace and stablility of the world.

Therefore, it is with great pleasure and security that we can now definetly say: We Have The Headcrab Bomb."

She went on to speak of the different ways this weapon will be employed.

"We have developed two ways to deploy Headcrabs:

1. An indeginously developed three stage rocket, to be dubbed 'Parasite Munition-Rocket Based Mk. 1.' This rocket, meant to become a medium-range strategic rocket with ranges of up to 800-1,200 nautical miles, can carry up to 500-700 Headcrabs, and is comparable to a Scud. However, with newly developed Point Defense Lasers, ECM jamming, Shock-absorbing structure and materials, such as a specially designed flexible cage for the crabs and newly tested nano-carbon chainmail and foam shock linings for the main carrier pod, and a proprietary engine that is 60% more efficent than that of the Scud and goes to Mach 3.5 make this weapon very competitive.

The Mk. 1 works in that the initial booster lifts it off of the launching platform, and after the first stage disengages, another booster, this one a solid -fuel booster, moves the payload towards its final destination. After this, the second-stage booster falls off, and the main carrier pod, goes to the ground, aided by an integral drag chute and steering jets. Once on the ground, the pod opens, and the Headcrabs are free to wreak havoc.

2. The Headcrab Munition-Air Dropped Mk. 1- this system is a conventional 5,000lb bomb, with integrated point defense lasers, a GPS guidance system, and more shcok-absorbing materials, along with a drag chute, retrorockets and fins to aid in its descent and accuracy. The HMAD-1 can deploy 800-1,300 Headcrabs, unlike the Rocket, and is equipped to be deployed from most types of aircraft, such as the B-52, the Vulcan, and even more advanced aircraft like the B-2 and the Tu-167 Blackjack. It is also specially modified for use with the B-70mk1, produced by Excelsior Military Industries.

The HMAD-1 is deployed on top of its target by a bomber, and using its guidance systems and retrorockets, aims and falls to Earth. Once at about 15,000-8,000 feet, a drag chute is deployed to help slow the bomb, and get the Headcrabs safely to Earth. For low-altitude missions, a special version of the chute may be mounted, or the retrorockets may be used instead."

She then went on to explian the benefits of Headcrabs.

"Why Headcrabs, you might ask? After at least five to ten years of testing, they have proven to be a weapon with strong effects, having a 95% zombification rate wherever they are deployed. Unlike conventional nuclear and biological weapons, these weapons do not last for generations-they can be killed when they are no longer needed during cleanup, or simply starved into nonexistence. Also, Headcrabs are naturally fast, agile, and strong, enabling them to penetrate through even the toughest of armor. And, once zombified, the subjects enjoy enhanced strength, an intense rage and hunger thanks to the natural predatory instinct of the headcrab, and begin to emit a moaning, weeping noise that, during extended tests, proved to be a devastating psychologcal weapon. When zombie armies were pitted against SOG troops and Home Guardsmen, they (the SOG and Home Guard) were bogged down, confused, and frightened by the zombies at every turn. They may have lacked tactics, but the zombies' sheer physical power and the incessant moaning proved to be a huge stumbling block for many SOG troops, even those from our shirt Ninja program. And these were our best."

Nomura then went on to explain:

"We are accepting orders for Headcrab munitions. However, we cannot let you breed your own Headcrabs, and we reserve the right to be picky. Also, we have begun to base Headcrab munitions in Mexico as a means of defending our interests there."
The Phoenix Milita
13-12-2004, 22:15
In response The Phoenix Milita has created a new weapons system to counter the threat.

PGM-54 "Rusty"
http://www.halflife2gauge.com/hl2/weapons/crowbar.gif
they will also be sold to allies for 12 dollars.
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 22:18
OOC: Yes, I'm a Half-Life nut.......the idea came from the Combine's parasite rockets.

However, I am very serious.....
MassPwnage
13-12-2004, 22:20
ooc: LMAO

Ah the classic Crowbar... Sorry, I have a severe Half Life addiction- The Great Leader Li.
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 22:24
OOC: Me too....but seriously, I think it is a nice idea....though probably there are those that look, and say "Huh?"
Doomingsland
13-12-2004, 22:33
OOC:Lol, I've got these for FT, since most people would ignore in MT, but good job. HL2 kicked ass!
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 22:38
OOC: Nice to hear that. I wanted to establish some kind of scientific basis (that is why I mentioned testing it for about 5-10 years), and my nation is called Upper Xen, so why not have a Headcrab bomb?

Seriously, thanks for the input.
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 23:08
UPDATE:

Pictures of these weapons have recently surfaced. Made available as part of the Admiral's Announcement, they will be openly available for questions and comments.

Headcrab: http://perso.wanadoo.fr/manu-site/half-life/headcrab.jpg
Zombies (during the 1989 Khotan Test): http://www.halflife2gauge.com/hl2/characters/zombies.gif
Zombies observed during test in abandoned Khotan Research Reactor, Xinjiang 1994: http://www.halflifefusion.com/screenshots/thumbs/1057742257.jpg
CRF Troops being deployed to the Khotan Test Site in 1994: http://www.thegamematrix.com/halflife.jpg
Headcrab Rocket: http://www.fas.org/irp/threat/missile/naic/008-1-s.jpg
Artists conception of a Headcrab Rocket: http://ansmodelisme.topcities.com/SECOND/tanks/scud1606.jpg
B-52 testing Headcrab PMAD-1's in Xinjiang: http://www.intercontal.com/b52.jpg
Whatevaaa
13-12-2004, 23:09
OOC: Lol. Dibs on the gravity gun.
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 23:13
IC:

Dr. Issac Kleiner XV of the Kleiner Polytechnic Institute says: "We're working on that. And for the record, it is a Zero Point Energy Manipulator, not a 'gravity gun.'"

OOC: Well, it is meant as a serious weapon, but in retrospect, it is kinda funny.
Upper Xen
13-12-2004, 23:43
"Upper Xen National Armscorp announces the aforementioned munitions will be available for purchase.

Starting price for the PMR-1 is USD$60,000,000 per rocket, USD$30,000,000 for a Hainan-class Mobile launcher.

Starting price for the PMAD-1 is USD$50,000,000 for each bomb.

We will not be selling production rights. we also reserve the right to refuse service to anyone."

Klimenti Rokossovsky
Director
Xenizen National Armscorp
Kyanges
14-12-2004, 02:04
Tag for possible orders.
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 02:13
OOC: Cool.

bump


IC:

"We thank you for your interest."

Klimenti Rokossovsky
Director
Xenizen National Armscorp
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 03:34
bump
Aquix
14-12-2004, 03:42
The Dominion of Aquix has always expressed great interest in the xenofauna being employed in the "Headcrab Bomb" and wonders if Upper Xen would be willing to sell a few sample of common head crab for the purposes of dissection and understanding more about the swollen headed menace. Aquix would also like to congratulate Upper Xen for developing a truly terrifying weapon.
The Combine of Xen
14-12-2004, 03:44
We the combine of xen will send as much headcrabs as possible to the Upper Xen so they can make more bombs. We hope to see this weapons used against anyone foolish to go up against the people of Xen.


From, the desk of Wallace Breen
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 03:48
"Aquix, We will lend you some Headcrabs, but we ask to send a handler to ensure that they are treated carefully and not used for any other purpose but peaceful scientific study."

"How does a brood of 50 headcrabs and a Gonarch Mother Crab sound, plus one handler? The price is USD$150,000 per year, we will cover living expenses for the Handler."

Nakamura Gorobei
Secretary of Education
Gordon Lew
President
Republic of Upper Xen
Aquix
14-12-2004, 03:57
The Dominion is delighted to at last have a chance to properly study the creature that has plagued our border colonies for far too long. We accept your terms and look forward to future trade between our two great nations.

Proffesor Doctor Charles Grubb, Chief Secretary of the Department of Progress
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 04:02
"You're welcome. A good percentage of our population is descended from the residents of the borderworld of Xen."

Nakamura Gorobei
Secretary of Education
Gordon Lew
President
Republic of Upper Xen
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 20:55
We the combine of xen will send as much headcrabs as possible to the Upper Xen so they can make more bombs. We hope to see this weapons used against anyone foolish to go up against the people of Xen.


From, the desk of Wallace Breen

"How many exactly? We thank you for your aid."

Mai Nomura
Chief of JCS, Deputy Sec. of Defense
Gordon Lew
President
Republic of Upper Xen
Upper Xen
14-12-2004, 22:38
bump for sales, and interest
Upper Xen
15-12-2004, 02:03
"Bump for sales of Headcrab munitions. These are perfectly serious weapons, and have been proven through years of tests."

Klimenti Rokossovsky
Director
Xenizen National Armscorp
Upper Xen
15-12-2004, 22:40
bump for sales.....half off everything for the next 10 RL days.
Upper Xen
16-12-2004, 22:14
bump
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:02
bump
Kyanges
17-12-2004, 03:11
OOC:

Wow, you think that something so funny would generate more sales, but lol, guess not? Hey, you'll only allow allied nations to use this for their own military purposes right? If that is the case, then...

IC:

The Republic of Kyanges would like to aquire a brood of the Headcrab for development of our own version of the Headcrab bomb. We can pay as much as you require (Within reason). We await your swift reply.
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:13
"We will sell you a brood of 50 Headcrabs and a Gonarch Mother Crab for USD$75,000. Original price was USD$150,000, but we are having a half-off sale."

Klimenti Rokossovsky
Director
Xenizen National Armscorp
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:21
bump for kyanges.....
Kyanges
17-12-2004, 03:26
The scientific community of the R.O.K. would like to extend its gratitude to UX for allowing us to aquire specimens of this facinating, yet deadly creature. The funds for this purchase will be from our Latebra Scientia funds. We request that certain elements of your SOG forces to link up with our Talons to help ensure the security of the transfer, along with safety concerns over the deadly cargo. I feel that our SpecOps are the only ones that can handle an outbreak of these things, if one should occur.

OOC:

Was carrying on an IM session...
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:33
We agree.....a SOG team, plus a team of National Wildlife Service Headcrab Wardens will manage this transfer. If anything goes wrong.....we have crowbars and poison gas. Bring NBC gear.
Kyanges
17-12-2004, 03:40
Confirmed. Standard Equipment anyway. You remember those Killzone suits we both happened to purchase?...
Well, we made some modifications...
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:50
Same with us. We modified them too.....and made them look something like this, but with a M1 helmet:


http://halflife2.gamesweb.com/gallerie/bild011_thumb_middle.jpg
Kyanges
17-12-2004, 03:54
Meh, seems kind of light. But looks like it'll get the job done.

OOC: Do you mind if you go onto the phone or SBC? I'll call, if a phone call is allowed. But if, not, then SBC.
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 03:55
have to go......sorry
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 21:12
bump for more orders!
Kyanges
17-12-2004, 21:36
===================================
--------{{Emergency Transmission}}--------
===================================
<<<Priority One>>>
{{{Secure Channel}}}

Message:

Upper Xen! There has been an out break of head crabs in our nation! HELP!!!!
They've taken over much of our city. It's horrible over here! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE and...Wait, NO AAARRGGGHGGH!!

==================
---End Transmission---
==================
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 21:39
Secret IC: To Kyanges:

"We will deploy Headcrab Warden advisor teams to help your nation combat this threat, and SOG troops. They have the resources and the experience to fight the Headcrabs."

Gordon Lew
President
Rep. of Upper Xen

OOC: This is bad for business.....
Upper Xen
17-12-2004, 21:42
bump
Upper Xen
18-12-2004, 17:36
bump for anybody interested in making this thing more feasible....
Upper Xen
20-12-2004, 00:12
bump
Upper Xen
20-12-2004, 15:04
bump