NationStates Jolt Archive

This is a satirical (well, supposed to be) response to Whittier's uninformed condemnation of the RWC.

The Government and Office of the Prime Minister in the Republic of Pacitalia notes:
1. That Whittier is a nation of desperate people attempting to tarnish the reputation of a first-class ideology such as capitalism or conservatism;
2. Whittier wishes to start conflicts by speaking wild and false claims that have no foundation or merit;
3. That Whittier has in the past attempted to look intelligent by repeat something it's already said, but by using a thesaurus to make it look different;
4. That we have good information that Whittier is a nation of uneducated slackers with no purpose other than to whine about alliances they have no true information or clue of;
5. That Whittier is in full violation of general intelligence laws;
6. That Whittier violates the human rights of her own people through desperate (and very unsuccessful) tactics like international mud-slinging of right-wing countries to stay in power;
7. That Whittier is a threat to the general intelligence of the world;
8. That Whittier threatens the sovereignty of other nations (Bor-der?)
9. That Whittier still seems to like the thesaurus... a lot

Be it formally declared that Pacitalia officially denounces and condemns the United Socialist States of Whittier for its moronic and politically bankrupt ways.
Be it further formally adopted and declared that anybody who feels the same way is a friend of Pacitalia.

Since when has Whittier been taken seriously is what I wish to know?

Since when has Whittier been taken seriously is what I wish to know?

That's why it's satire. ;)

OOC: lol...I like reasons 2, 3, 4, 7, and 9...those are great.

Brown ugly maggots puke!

This is a satirical (well, supposed to be) response to Whittier's uninformed condemnation of the RWC.

The Government and Office of the Prime Minister in the Republic of Pacitalia notes:
1. That Whittier is a nation of desperate people attempting to tarnish the reputation of a first-class ideology such as capitalism or conservatism;
2. Whittier wishes to start conflicts by speaking wild and false claims that have no foundation or merit;
3. That Whittier has in the past attempted to look intelligent by repeat something it's already said, but by using a thesaurus to make it look different;
4. That we have good information that Whittier is a nation of uneducated slackers with no purpose other than to whine about alliances they have no true information or clue of;
5. That Whittier is in full violation of general intelligence laws;
6. That Whittier violates the human rights of her own people through desperate (and very unsuccessful) tactics like international mud-slinging of right-wing countries to stay in power;
7. That Whittier is a threat to the general intelligence of the world;
8. That Whittier threatens the sovereignty of other nations (Bor-der?)
9. That Whittier still seems to like the thesaurus... a lot

Be it formally declared that Pacitalia officially denounces and condemns the United Socialist States of Whittier for its moronic and politically bankrupt ways.
Be it further formally adopted and declared that anybody who feels the same way is a friend of Pacitalia.


In response to this outrage, Whittier demands Pacitalia's surrender.
To show we mean business, 25 lemon cream pies have been shot at a ship carrying the Pacitalia flag.

OOC: You did say this was satire.

OOC: Yeah, it's satire. Don't worry, we don't REALLY have anything against you.

If Pacitalia does not surrender, Whittier will be forced to take dire actions.

OOC: Yeah, it's satire. Don't worry, we don't REALLY have anything against you.
k, but it would make for an interesting satiric war rp. Hence the lemon cream pies.

IC: President Big Mac has just ordered the activiation of Whittier's army of Playboy models.
If Pacitalia does not surrender, we will invade them with our Playboy models.

Pacitalia's horny armed forces are more than welcome to take them.

Ok, that does it. Send the rubber ducky expeditionary forces.
25,000 Rubber duckies waddle onto troop transports to be taken to the shores of Pacitalia where they will make their landing.

OOC: The original poster stated this thread was only satire. Please don't take any of this stuff seriously.

The rubber duckies have been collected, checked for bugs, communication equipment and/or explosives. They will now be cleaned and distributed to bathtubs around the nation.

245,000 troops armed with lemon merangue pie launchers are being sent in to rescue the rubber duckies.

30 maraschino cherry launchers will be set up along the shores of Pacitalia to add contrast to these wonderful desserts. The unharmed desserts will be collected and put on the dinner tables of Pacitalians.

I here-by bomb both sides with papers that say, " I nOOk JOO shift+11111"

So, this is hereby a comedic tag

As the 234th Marine Expetionary Transports land on the beaches of Pacitalia, they open fire on everything that moves with their machine guns spitting out chocolate covered cherries.

OOC: Couldn't think of anything else.