NationStates Jolt Archive

We had a nut in our region. It was one of those "If some meddling is good, more must be better" nuts.

First, the nut gave us soil bacteria that goes nuts six months out of the year, and dormant the other six. And we were happy. We could have some trees now, and occasionally things would rot. This gave way to actual soil, which meant rather then importing all our food, or fishing for it, we could actually plant things.

Life was good. Our temperatures rose in some areas, wind was slowed, and the scent of Antarctic Pine was a good thing.

Then.... he imported polar bears. Big predator, no enemies, lots of food around which had no idea what a polar bear was. And to top it all off, all those trees for the damn bears to hide in.

Kids went from walking to school to learning to handle an RPG to handle the damn bears.

You want polar bear? Tastes nothing like chicken. Greasy, known to catch fire if improperly prepared. Don't eat the liver and you'll be fine.

We ship to meet demand. We'll also host hunting groups. Hell, bring a small army to hunt the damn things. They've eaten two so far. No, not hunters - hunting parties.

So, anyone want polar bears?

Truth be told, the Polar bear is our National Animal.

You want more? Have some. Free. Swear. All yours. All we ask is you don't return them. Ever.

*ships two freighterloads of tranquilized polar bears to Ratheia*

A rusty, seaweed covered antenna rises from the ocean as the command submarine of the Gloriously Hungry Army Of Not Very Swift But Very Firey Death Thanks To Our Alien Leader Blowing Our Food Budget On Napalm Instead Of Rations Because He Forgot Humans Had To Eat Well That's A Zircon For You We're Not Saying Anything About It After He Had That Building Fall On Him And Just Clawed His Way Through It God He's Scary sends a transmission

-Audio Only

"Fhghoooooooooooooooooood!!"

"Yes, Hive Lord Kathxeth. They have food. We need foo-"

"Fhghooooooooooooooooooooood!!"

"No, napalm isn't food!"

"... Fghooooood thare?"

"Yes, they have food. We need to arrange a-"

"Whgheeeeeeeeee khooooooom fhur fghoooooooooooooood!"

"Erm... To translate that... we're... ah... comming to help you with your polar bear problem, if you wish..."

We'd like to send a few hunting groups to go after these crazy ass polar bears.

OOC: Can we RP this one?

I'll take a shipment, because they'll soon learn to respect our Osminogs!

Maybe...

Maybe if I were to send over a few Cheshire cats.....

No. They'd get slaughtered. Cannot allow that.

We'd like to send a few hunting groups to go after these crazy ass polar bears.

OOC: Can we RP this one?

Hell yeah.

OOC: Hell yeah. I'll set up a thread on that in a few.

The Shah would like to hunt a few, or rather alot since we are bringing 40 nobles armed with Weatherby .460s and Barret M-82s for hunting.

I'll take a shipment, because they'll soon learn to respect our Osminogs!

Seeing as you're an ally and all... anything that happens is not our fault.

*ships four freighterloads of tranquilized polar bears*

YAY!!! Kill polar bears!!! Oh I have an idea all the parties that are thinking of going over could be just one freakin' party.

A rusty, seaweed covered antenna rises from the ocean as the command submarine of the Gloriously Hungry Army Of Not Very Swift But Very Firey Death Thanks To Our Alien Leader Blowing Our Food Budget On Napalm Instead Of Rations Because He Forgot Humans Had To Eat Well That's A Zircon For You We're Not Saying Anything About It After He Had That Building Fall On Him And Just Clawed His Way Through It God He's Scary sends a transmission

-Audio Only

"Fhghoooooooooooooooooood!!"

"Yes, Hive Lord Kathxeth. They have food. We need foo-"

"Fhghooooooooooooooooooooood!!"

"No, napalm isn't food!"

"... Fghooooood thare?"

"Yes, they have food. We need to arrange a-"

"Whgheeeeeeeeee khooooooom fhur fghoooooooooooooood!"

"Erm... To translate that... we're... ah... comming to help you with your polar bear problem, if you wish..."

How many do you want?

I'll..........erm.....kick one for free?

-Audio Transmission

"Well, it would probably best to just set our fearless leader loose and see how many he drags back. Chances are he'll bring back enough to feed us just on his preliminary killing rage." Says Stephens, the chief Administrator of the ZES WHAGH!!. "We'll make sure to make it clear that the only targets are the polar bears, not anything else."

-Audio Transmission

"Well, it would probably best to just set our fearless leader loose and see how many he drags back. Chances are he'll bring back enough to feed us just on his preliminary killing rage." Says Stephens, the chief Administrator of the ZES WHAGH!!. "We'll make sure to make it clear that the only targets are the polar bears, not anything else."

Oh God have Mercy on those poor bears.....there won't be anything left O.o

Vastiva can you umm... RP the polar bears?

Oh God have Mercy on those poor bears.....there won't be anything left O.o

Bets on that?

I'll take 1,000 of them! They should do well in our artic nature preserve.

Vastiva can you umm... RP the polar bears?

OOC: Setting up thread now, calmeth downeth.

I'll take 1,000 of them! They should do well in our artic nature preserve.

*ships you 1000 of the damn bears. Heck, we include - at no charge - another thousand bears.*

Antarctican Polar Bears

Height:
Twelve feet at least. One twenty foot monster was busily dismantling a truck when finally stopped.

Weight:
Females: 775 to more than 1,500 pounds
Males: 900 to more then 2,500 pounds.

Intelligence: At least as smart as apes. They open doors. Have not figured out locks. Yet.

Forepaws measure between 12” and 24” across, are webbed. Did I mention the claws?

A polar bear is so well-insulated that it experiences almost no heat loss. In addition to its insulating fur, the bear's blubber layer can measure between 6.5 inches thick to a whopping 11.2 inches thick.

So effective is the polar bear's insulation that adult males quickly overheat when they run. NOT! They can run at a dismaying 15 mph over short distance, but prefer to ambush. They can swim at 6 mph and have no known limit on distance they can travel. They can also see 15 to 25 feet in the water.

Because polar bears give off no detectable heat, they do not show up in infrared photographs. (Infrared film measures heat.) When a scientist attempted to photograph a bear with such film, he produced a print with a single spot--the puff of air caused by the animal's breath. Then it ate him.

Small arms mean nothing to these bears. Anything less then a .45 round is annoying but will not penetrate the hide and fat armor.

Sorry. We'll calm down.

I'll..........erm.....kick one for free?

How fast do you run?

Thanks for the extra bears. If we can catch them, we'll use them for feeding the poor.

Thanks for the extra bears. If we can catch them, we'll use them for feeding the poor.

Don't you mean "feed them the poor"? Left out a -m there.

Don't you mean "feed them the poor"? Left out a -m there.

Well we got to fatten the poor up before feeding them to the bears in the nature preserve.

The Polar Bear is our national animal as well. We would love to take some. (how do you think we keep our prison population down while having T.V. Ratings soar ;))

OOC: The thread is up, anyone asking prior to this point is invited, go for it.

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=376519

These bears are indeed highly intelligent. And pretty sexy, when it comes down to it. In the spirit of recent important UN legislation we will invite carefully selected bears to enter our collective as prospective marriage partners. Our scientists are trying to work out whether penguin/bear cross-breeding can be achieved - no word yet on what the offspring would be like...

These bears are indeed highly intelligent. And pretty sexy, when it comes down to it. In the spirit of recent important UN legislation we will invite carefully selected bears to enter our collective as prospective marriage partners. Our scientists are trying to work out whether penguin/bear cross-breeding can be achieved - no word yet on what the offspring would be like...

Warning - bears are not sentient, only clever. And they eat penguins. Much like humans eat McNuggets.

Transmission: The Scout Recon Ship ARL Druagar Would like to send a Scout Recon team for training evaluation against these beast and further test their skills in tracking and stalking of targets. This team will consist of a Five man Impact Marine Team, Utilizing the M-590 Assualt Rifle. (http://www.space-readyroom.de/images/SAAB_M-590_jpg.jpg). Crack Grenades, and Cold Weather enclosed high impact body suits or CWEHI's. They will be dropped on foot into your designated Territory upon accepts of orders and authorization for the Duration of 10 Days at which time a Scout craft will be dispatched for pick up of them and Any kills they have achieved. There will be No pickup of wounded or KIA at an time. The Impact Marines WILL NOT request to join or form any parties outside of their own team. And will consider any entering their alloted sector as hostile and will engage on site. If these terms are agreeable They will be standing by. Captain Harper turns and smiles running a hand through his hair. He nods to the Impact Marine Lt. standing at the hatch entrance. The Lt. snaps a salute smiles and turns speaking to a sergeant. "Cold Weather Gear Sergeant and insure HALO equipment is stowed and ready for your team. You will be in charge good luck. and try and leave some of the bears alive.. we need these grounds for further evaluation of teams if the locals agree to the terms." The Sergeant salutes and turns with out a word heading into the berthing area to prepare his team for insertion.

Humans eat McNuggets?!? They're even less intelligent than we thought. But we've accepted a few of them as marriage partners, so I'm sure we'll do just fine with the bears.

OOC: Put it over here, on the RP thread. (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=376519 ) Enjoy!

Warning - bears are not sentient, only clever. And they eat penguins. Much like humans eat McNuggets.

Penguins live in the Antarctic. Polar bears live in the Arctic.
Except for cartoons and maybe a zoo, they've never met. :)


BTW- Polar bears are all left handed (pawed?). :D

Aaahh. You have clearly never visited the NS Antarctic, where migrant polar bears established a colony and have since, uh, mutated somewhat, as per Vastiva's thread above...

Transmission: The Scout Recon Ship ARL Druagar Would like to send a Scout Recon team for training evaluation against these beast and further test their skills in tracking and stalking of targets. This team will consist of a Five man Impact Marine Team, Utilizing the M-590 Assualt Rifle. (http://www.space-readyroom.de/images/SAAB_M-590_jpg.jpg). Crack Grenades, and Cold Weather enclosed high impact body suits or CWEHI's. They will be dropped on foot into your designated Territory upon accepts of orders and authorization for the Duration of 10 Days at which time a Scout craft will be dispatched for pick up of them and Any kills they have achieved. There will be No pickup of wounded or KIA at an time. The Impact Marines WILL NOT request to join or form any parties outside of their own team. And will consider any entering their alloted sector as hostile and will engage on site. If these terms are agreeable They will be standing by. Captain Harper turns and smiles running a hand through his hair. He nods to the Impact Marine Lt. standing at the hatch entrance. The Lt. snaps a salute smiles and turns speaking to a sergeant. "Cold Weather Gear Sergeant and insure HALO equipment is stowed and ready for your team. You will be in charge good luck. and try and leave some of the bears alive.. we need these grounds for further evaluation of teams if the locals agree to the terms." The Sergeant salutes and turns with out a word heading into the berthing area to prepare his team for insertion.

Vastiva accepts, transmitting coordinates of Southern Pine Forest and opening flight path through orbital defense grid for insertion.

Good luck. Shoot lots of bears. Thank you.

OOC: Continue posting here. Thank you! (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=376519 )

Aaahh. You have clearly never visited the NS Antarctic, where migrant polar bears established a colony and have since, uh, mutated somewhat, as per Vastiva's thread above...

We LIKE the Joopian bears. The sentient bears are wonderful.

These particular pests are a threat.

OOC: And I established how they got here in the first post, please read it.

As we are fairly new to Antartica, we have been very cautious of these polar bears, those who wonder into our compounds, though, are quite delicous! And we can use thier hides for warm blankets in the harsh wilderness.
We would like to help you hunt them. :sniper:

~Electronic Communication to Vastiva~
You're still having problems with the bears?
I would like to send a single group of my soldiers. 4 special forces, 12 marines, all armed with the latest tech my factories are producing. I'm sure after tangling with a minigun will certainly lessen their survival chances.
I expect I'll probably lose a few of the marines. But they're replaceable.
-Dictator Enigma
~End communication~

So can I go hunt them plz plz plz?

hello?

OOC: Pheonix and Demon, go hunt the bears on the other thread, you're invited, enjoy. So far, the Bears are ahead 4/0.

We're shooting at them.

OOC: Mostly, its not working very well...

.75 rifles do nothing against these monstrosities?

Send Polar bears to our community. We will show them what it means to learn, and then train for our defense. Cybornetics, and bioengineering will be our strong point

.75 rifles do nothing against these monstrosities?

OOC: They're immune to anything less then a .45, a .75 can injure them but its not as effective as it would be against a human. Have a look at all that armor they're carrying, most of it impact ablative (fat).

In short - body shots are not all that effective.

send us some polar bears.... real big ones..... males and females.... and babies.....lots of babies...... so we can train them and create an evil army of polar bears to destroy the world..... exept where ever the heck this place is ... we will leave you alone but only if you give us polar bears...lota of polar bears

send us some polar bears.... real big ones..... males and females.... and babies.....lots of babies...... so we can train them and create an evil army of polar bears to destroy the world..... exept where ever the heck this place is ... we will leave you alone but only if you give us polar bears...lota of polar bears

*sends four freighterloads of polar bears*

Did I mention they won't train and hate people? No? Oh well. No returns.

I could use a freightload. We have powerful weapons we need to test and these suckers are close enough to tanks to count.

I could use a freightload. We have powerful weapons we need to test and these suckers are close enough to tanks to count.

*sends you a freighterload*

Enjoy. No returns accepted. Feed them anything you have hanging around. They're partial to anything smaller then they are.

*sends four freighterloads of polar bears*

Did I mention they won't train and hate people? No? Oh well. No returns.

oh dont worry they will obey us and if they dont we will clone them and unleash hords of them throughtout our enemys citys muahhahahaha starting with our most hated enemy the trecherous Armed Republic of Eronilian and then all of the UN a hahaha

oh dont worry they will obey us and if they dont we will clone them and unleash hords of them throughtout our enemys citys muahhahahaha starting with our most hated enemy the trecherous Armed Republic of Eronilian and then all of the UN a hahaha

I'm nearly two thousand lightyears away from you and the polar bears will die of overheating on both of my worlds long before they'd even make a dent. You might want to rethink that plan.

oh dont worry they will obey us and if they dont we will clone them and unleash hords of them throughtout our enemys citys muahhahahaha starting with our most hated enemy the trecherous Armed Republic of Eronilian and then all of the UN a hahaha
-OOC-
I'll even give you a ride to one of Neo-Mekanta's two major territories. Planet Ghyagis, homeworld of the Zircon. (They were created there.)

In addition to being crawling with Zircon (see the hunt topic for how effective polar bears are against them) the planet itself will probably hunt the bears.

In short... bring it.

who might you be? i dont beleive i had planned to attack you im plannig on sending them first to the space station of the Iviticus project but if you want me to attack you as well i chould genetically engeneer some kind of super heat resistant (GIANT) polar bear to have invade you also...

who might you be? i dont beleive i had planned to attack you im plannig on sending them first to the space station of the Iviticus project but if you want me to attack you as well i chould genetically engeneer some kind of super heat resistant (GIANT) polar bear to have invade you also...

Meh. Try it. I'll just shoot your ships down and distract your nation from producing any more by hitting it with antimatter bombs until not even the ground is left.

might i ask the name of your nations and there regeions? so that i can add you to my dossier

Now I know you're new.

Okay, kid, here's a few facts:

1) Trying to take over the world will only get you laughed at, beaten up, and ignored. And that doesn't matter how big you are.

2) If you want to make yourself important, shape up on the grammar and spelling and RP on threads. Save the silly stuff, such as bear armies, for silly threads or others taking over the world.

3) My 4000 schoolgirls armed with slingshots would pwn you and not even break a sweat.

4) You only need the nation name to find a nation.

5) The dossier is useless. You want my military strength? Find my factbook thread. Keep in mind it's not up to date.

OOC: *thinks about an armored polar bear*
*shudders*

Alright, enough hijacking.

two things first it doesnt sound like you are even a part of this planet so i havent really been talking to you at all about destroying the world and secondly i am mainly planning to attack a nation that i am currently at war with so if you feel like interfering then dont be such a smarty pants and just think about staying out of the way of my army i am evil and i can decide to do what i want to as for the heavily armored polar bears i think that whould be briliant but they need guns too hehe he

two things first it doesnt sound like you are even a part of this planet so i havent really been talking to you at all about destroying the world and secondly i am mainly planning to attack a nation that i am currently at war with so if you feel like interfering then dont be such a smarty pants and just think about staying out of the way of my army i am evil and i can decide to do what i want to as for the heavily armored polar bears i think that whould be briliant but they need guns too hehe he

IGNORED

two things first it doesnt sound like you are even a part of this planet so i havent really been talking to you at all about destroying the world and secondly i am mainly planning to attack a nation that i am currently at war with so if you feel like interfering then dont be such a smarty pants and just think about staying out of the way of my army i am evil and i can decide to do what i want to as for the heavily armored polar bears i think that whould be briliant but they need guns too hehe he

Are you bear hunting? No? You have your shipment. Please depart.

OOC: They're immune to anything less then a .45, a .75 can injure them but its not as effective as it would be against a human. Have a look at all that armor they're carrying, most of it impact ablative (fat).

In short - body shots are not all that effective.
OOC: Come on, .50 rifles can penetrate armored vehicles. Don't tell me that they will simply only "injure" the polar bears (unless you hit them in the leg or the paw).

IC:
The GDMO would like to train a unit of Mountain Infantry that is equipped with new equipment. Thus, we request clearance to airdrop a battalion of infantry into your territory. Resupply airdrops will also need to occur every so often.

By the way, have you considered the usage of napalm?

--LT.GEN. RANDOLPH BRIGHAM, Head of Operations, Army Central Command

OOC: Taking this to the RP thread.

OOC: Come on, .50 rifles can penetrate armored vehicles. Don't tell me that they will simply only "injure" the polar bears (unless you hit them in the leg or the paw).

IC:
The GDMO would like to train a unit of Mountain Infantry that is equipped with new equipment. Thus, we request clearance to airdrop a battalion of infantry into your territory. Resupply airdrops will also need to occur every so often.

By the way, have you considered the usage of napalm?

--LT.GEN. RANDOLPH BRIGHAM, Head of Operations, Army Central Command

OOC: Taking this to the RP thread.

OOC: Its a penetration issue. Soft cover which nullifies the ballistic force is different then hard cover which resists it directly. In the case of the bear, the soft armor spreads out the force and slows the bullet significantly. This is part of the reason dirt is excellent soft cover and a dirt pile will stop a .50 bullet, while that same bullet will go through armor plate.

IC: Request denied. We are not interested in people training troops, we are interested in the removal of bears.

And napalm would destroy the trees, which we like having. We also don't want alot of trees blown up. Replanting is enough of a beast, even without the damn bears.

The Needlessly Hardcore Division of Chaosmanglemaimdeathia's Mobile Infantry division requests a freighterload of polar bears, as they need something to pose a challenge, now that they can handle most heavy tanks, aliens and dragons with nothing but their combat boots and sharpened butter knives.

Pietas, Fidelis, Gloria,
The High Lord God-Emperor of Chaosmanglemaimdeathia

OOC: Its a penetration issue. Soft cover which nullifies the ballistic force is different then hard cover which resists it directly. In the case of the bear, the soft armor spreads out the force and slows the bullet significantly. This is part of the reason dirt is excellent soft cover and a dirt pile will stop a .50 bullet, while that same bullet will go through armor plate.

IC: Request denied. We are not interested in people training troops, we are interested in the removal of bears.

And napalm would destroy the trees, which we like having. We also don't want alot of trees blown up. Replanting is enough of a beast, even without the damn bears.
OOC: Ah, thank you for the clarification.

IC: Please allow me to add one more detail. I am not as much training troops as much as testing out new weapons (which I believe others are doing already). The targets would be, of course, the polar bears. We get, essentially, a wargame. You get dead polar bears. Think of it as Duck Hunt with an ample dash of wilderness survival added. ;)

We are sorry for the miscommunication and hope that our case will be reviewed again.

--LT.GEN. RANDOLPH BRIGHAM, Head of Operations, Army Central Command

We are strongly against your cold-hearted slaughter of these glorious, magestic creatures. Bears are magnificant animals of great power and should be respected and treated appropriately. If you must remove these animals, then we request as large a shipment as possible of sedated polar bears sent to our country ASAP. We will be fully prepared to unload and house the bears in suitably equipped facilities; following this we will ship them to humane wildlife sanctuaries in countries with appropriate climates and terrain.


*Goes off to hunt cuddly bunnies and kitty-cats*

Pay me and I will help kill bears

OOC: Ah, thank you for the clarification.

IC: Please allow me to add one more detail. I am not as much training troops as much as testing out new weapons (which I believe others are doing already). The targets would be, of course, the polar bears. We get, essentially, a wargame. You get dead polar bears. Think of it as Duck Hunt with an ample dash of wilderness survival added. ;)

We are sorry for the miscommunication and hope that our case will be reviewed again.

--LT.GEN. RANDOLPH BRIGHAM, Head of Operations, Army Central Command

No napalm, no blowing up vast tracts of land.

If that is acceptable, you are cleared for activity ONLY in the Southern Pine Forest Region.

Vastiva will allow the use of her hospitals in dire cases, but will accept no responsibility for the damn bears.

The Needlessly Hardcore Division of Chaosmanglemaimdeathia's Mobile Infantry division requests a freighterload of polar bears, as they need something to pose a challenge, now that they can handle most heavy tanks, aliens and dragons with nothing but their combat boots and sharpened butter knives.

Pietas, Fidelis, Gloria,
The High Lord God-Emperor of Chaosmanglemaimdeathia

Take two, they're cheap... make that FREE!

*sends two freighterloads of polar bears*

We refuse returns. Good luck.

We are strongly against your cold-hearted slaughter of these glorious, magestic creatures. Bears are magnificant animals of great power and should be respected and treated appropriately. If you must remove these animals, then we request as large a shipment as possible of sedated polar bears sent to our country ASAP. We will be fully prepared to unload and house the bears in suitably equipped facilities; following this we will ship them to humane wildlife sanctuaries in countries with appropriate climates and terrain.


*Goes off to hunt cuddly bunnies and kitty-cats*

*sends two freighterloads of damn bears*

Be warned, nothing short of armored walls stop these things. They are smart enough to open doors - and do. They are also an apex predator - they eat everything smaller then they are. Including cars. We have had one APC torn apart as a bear went for the "chewy center".

Have fun with your bears. No returns accepted.

Pay me and I will help kill bears

*sends a dollar*

You supply equipment. Enjoy your time with the bears.

"Sir? OVERSIGHT has a preliminary count of the polar bear population."
"Excellent? How many do we have?"
"...."
"How many do we have?"
"Well... sir... these numbers are preliminary, you do understand. And based on UV scans of the region, compared over a..."
"How. Many. Bears."
"About two hundred..."
"Excellent!"
"...thousand."
*blinks*
"WHAT?!?"
"Yes, sir. OVERSIGHT estimates just over two hundred thousand bears in the Southern Pine Forest at this time."

The argh could be heard in the next building.

<snip> ... Our scientists are trying to work out whether penguin/bear cross-breeding can be achieved - no word yet on what the offspring would be like...

I am trying to figure out what kind of market their might be for REALLY BIG fur tuxedoes ...

We will gladly ship you a few for modelling purposes

- Kidane Alemachu, Vizier of Trade and Contracts

Ooops, forgot to ask for an invite to the hunting thread, um, well, this is mine.
My request thing :D

OOC: Retroactively invited, interesting intro btw

OOC: Retroactively invited, interesting intro btw

Thanks! I aim to please :D

OOC Not bad at all. Just do try to keep OOC in here.

It seems that you can help us with one of our problems while we may be able to help you with one of yours.

As our compulsory military service has left us with more recruits than we have training facilities for we of the Free Land of Pseudo Randomness would like to send a hunting party of recruits.

This is not a training mission, this is merely an attempt to deal with our surplus of recruits.

As it would be unsporting to send them improperly armed we will be sending group of 25 recruits armed with five of our recoilless railguns. The standard unit is five soldiers per railgun so the math works out nicely.

The WTF-42 Recoilless Railgun has an effective range of eighteen klicks against standard APCs. The maximum range against softer targets is sixty klicks provided that the gunner can hit what they want at that range. Its maximum rate of fire is three rounds per second until its sixty round cartridge is expended. Replacing the cartridge takes eight seconds provided that there are three crew members plus the gunner remaining. (One to remove the spent cartridge, one to install the new cartridge, and one to handle the cartridge locking mechanism.)

Explosive rounds, AP flechettes, and DPU armor piercing are available for the WTF-42 RRG.

When operating independently the WTF-42 RRG can be broke down into four parts which may each be packed by one soldier. The firing-chamber/barrel plus the soldier's standard gear is the full load for one soldier. The other parts are small enough that they allow one soldier to carry two ammunition cartridges in addition to thier standard gear. The fifth soldier carries thier standard gear plus comms gear, extra medical gear, extra rations, and one ammo cartridge.

We would highly recommend that you direct our hunting party to an area with an uninhabited mountain range or at least sixty klicks of uninhabited land downrange.

[OOC: This will be my first attempt at RPing in this forum. I've read about Godmoding and will attempt to avoid that and any other rude behaviors. Any hunting parties which happen to be downrange are of course free to RP the effects of the shots my troops fire at random. Most of the shots my troops fire will be at random. These are nearly raw recruits (one week of abbreviated basic training plus four days on the operation of the WTF-42 RRG) and as recreational drugs are legal in the Free Land of Pseudo Randomness they'll have plenty of those plus lots of nice military grade stimulants.]

Arthur Parkes is a retired officer of the Khwarezmian Army with a taste for Big Game. He hunts anything dangerous, the faster, the more teeth and claws and the bigger the better. His comrades are similarly inclined. Bears - fast(ish?), lots of teeth and claws, very big by the sounds of things, should be a mere jaunt in the tundra. Shouldn't it?

Col. Arthur C. M. Parkes
Rhino hunting rifle, pistol with dum dum rounds.

Lieutenant Hawke Caltrel
Assault rifle, shotgun, grenades.

Sergeant Coryn “Fuzz” Fuselle
Assault rifle with scope, grenades.

Sergeant Aurelius Brin
Machine gun, grenades.

They all have white snow gear (though I doubt the colour will help) and snow goggles.

yes i have done it i have begun cloning of the giant polar bears!
i have also begun to supply them with armour and soon weapons also
mua haha who wants a real challenge? they are on sale now starting at $30,000 - $60,000 for the big ones.

It seems that you can help us with one of our problems while we may be able to help you with one of yours.

As our compulsory military service has left us with more recruits than we have training facilities for we of the Free Land of Pseudo Randomness would like to send a hunting party of recruits.

This is not a training mission, this is merely an attempt to deal with our surplus of recruits.

As it would be unsporting to send them improperly armed we will be sending group of 25 recruits armed with five of our recoilless railguns. The standard unit is five soldiers per railgun so the math works out nicely.

The WTF-42 Recoilless Railgun has an effective range of eighteen klicks against standard APCs. The maximum range against softer targets is sixty klicks provided that the gunner can hit what they want at that range. Its maximum rate of fire is three rounds per second until its sixty round cartridge is expended. Replacing the cartridge takes eight seconds provided that there are three crew members plus the gunner remaining. (One to remove the spent cartridge, one to install the new cartridge, and one to handle the cartridge locking mechanism.)

Explosive rounds, AP flechettes, and DPU armor piercing are available for the WTF-42 RRG.

When operating independently the WTF-42 RRG can be broke down into four parts which may each be packed by one soldier. The firing-chamber/barrel plus the soldier's standard gear is the full load for one soldier. The other parts are small enough that they allow one soldier to carry two ammunition cartridges in addition to thier standard gear. The fifth soldier carries thier standard gear plus comms gear, extra medical gear, extra rations, and one ammo cartridge.

We would highly recommend that you direct our hunting party to an area with an uninhabited mountain range or at least sixty klicks of uninhabited land downrange.

[OOC: This will be my first attempt at RPing in this forum. I've read about Godmoding and will attempt to avoid that and any other rude behaviors. Any hunting parties which happen to be downrange are of course free to RP the effects of the shots my troops fire at random. Most of the shots my troops fire will be at random. These are nearly raw recruits (one week of abbreviated basic training plus four days on the operation of the WTF-42 RRG) and as recreational drugs are legal in the Free Land of Pseudo Randomness they'll have plenty of those plus lots of nice military grade stimulants.]


We will allow this if the only loads given are the AP flechettes.

We like our trees and do not need nuclear "glow in the dark" trees.

Arthur Parkes is a retired officer of the Khwarezmian Army with a taste for Big Game. He hunts anything dangerous, the faster, the more teeth and claws and the bigger the better. His comrades are similarly inclined. Bears - fast(ish?), lots of teeth and claws, very big by the sounds of things, should be a mere jaunt in the tundra. Shouldn't it?

Col. Arthur C. M. Parkes
Rhino hunting rifle, pistol with dum dum rounds.

Lieutenant Hawke Caltrel
Assault rifle, shotgun, grenades.

Sergeant Coryn “Fuzz” Fuselle
Assault rifle with scope, grenades.

Sergeant Aurelius Brin
Machine gun, grenades.

They all have white snow gear (though I doubt the colour will help) and snow goggles.

Approved. Enjoy. We should mention that dum-dum rounds do nothing to these bears except annoy them. Occasionally they itch.

yes i have done it i have begun cloning of the giant polar bears!
i have also begun to supply them with armour and soon weapons also
mua haha who wants a real challenge? they are on sale now starting at $30,000 - $60,000 for the big ones.

We don't want them back in any form. Particularly bigger. Especially not bigger and armed.

You might consider a storefront of your own.

The Kingdom of Karrnath formally requests the shipment of 5,000 bears, for military purposes. We would like to use them to develop into crack soldier, once we intall them with the experimental mind-control devices.

ELITE POLAR BEARS! WITH LASERS STRAPPED TO THEIR HEADS!!!! *maniacal laughter*

The Kingdom of Karrnath formally requests the shipment of 5,000 bears, for military purposes. We would like to use them to develop into crack soldier, once we intall them with the experimental mind-control devices.

ELITE POLAR BEARS! WITH LASERS STRAPPED TO THEIR HEADS!!!! *maniacal laughter*

*shipment sent*

We would note a FT race attempted this and discovered that the polar bears are immune to all forms of mind control.

No returns accepted.

are you requesting those from me? if so you had better pay up first!

one other thing i chould genetically modify a new type for you that might* obey you. for the right price that is..

OOC: Evoclia, Karrnath, take it out of my thread.

We will allow this if the only loads given are the AP flechettes.

We like our trees and do not need nuclear "glow in the dark" trees.

DPU rounds are not radioactive, but they would tear up the trees nicely.

AP rounds it is.

As we have had no directions given as to which part of the forest is least inhabited we'll be dropping our party near the eastern edge of the forest and working west through the center of the forest.

Oh, and BTW, this is a trial run. If it is successful what is the largest size hunting party you are willing to host?


EDIT: Changed location of the drop point.

"What? No mind-control? Oh well. No mind-controlled bears for us. No, we'll have...
ZOMBIE bears!" he exclaims, bursting into a fit of maniacal laughter, before turning to a minion.
"You there! Begin the nerve gassing of these bears!"
"Your majesty? What bears?"
"The ones that we've been sent by the Sultanate of Vastiva!"
"Yes, your majesty."
He turns to Venim ir'Ormik, his Minister of the Dead.
"Venim! There is a shipload of corpses coming in! I wish your wizards to animate them!"

Oh! Can I send some troops to play? :)

DPU rounds are not radioactive, but they would tear up the trees nicely.

AP rounds it is.

As we have had no directions given as to which part of the forest is least inhabited we'll be dropping our party near the eastern edge of the forest and working west through the center of the forest.

Oh, and BTW, this is a trial run. If it is successful what is the largest size hunting party you are willing to host?


EDIT: Changed location of the drop point.

Battalion sized.

Oh! Can I send some troops to play? :)

Cmon over. Bears are that way.

(OOC: Read the first post on the other thread then post)

OOC: Somehow I was really tired and completely missed that the thread was an invited thread.

Anyway, the platoon I did mention in the IC thread would like to join for training reasons, they help take care of your bear problem, it gives the greenies combat experience...and I'd be willing to pay you for the time and any terrain damages it could bring forth.

OOC: Somehow I was really tired and completely missed that the thread was an invited thread.

Anyway, the platoon I did mention in the IC thread would like to join for training reasons, they help take care of your bear problem, it gives the greenies combat experience...and I'd be willing to pay you for the time and any terrain damages it could bring forth.

"They want to PAY us?"
"As long as they don't want to SUE us..."

***

To: Tenarius Military Command

Feel free to use the bears as target practice for as long as you like. We ask that you don't burn down the forest or cause significant damage to the forest.

The bears, you may damage as much as you want.

We take no responsibility for actions of those damn bears, but offer our hospitals for your usage, at preferred rates. We will also perform regular drops of supplies at your convenience if desired.

Namaste,
Kidane Alemachu, Vizier of Trade and Contracts

Message to Vastivan Vizier of Trade and Contracts:

We will do our best to protect the enviroment, Tenarius is commited to making sure the planet stays alive, and eliminating these bears from Vastiva is one way to keep the enviroment working properly.

Our men have all agreed to the dangers of hunting these bears, and all accidents and/or casualties will be the responsibility of their Commanders.

Thank you for allowing us to hunt, the Royal Guard Platoon will arrive shortly.

"Hospital report?"
"Yes, sir. We have a shortage of whole blood and plasmas; we will be importing from the northern areas. And additional stitching materials."
"Ah. Oh well. What will this cost us?"
"Nothing. Its being subsidized by the cable show subscriptions. People seem to like people getting mauled by bears."

~incoming transmision from evoclia royal transport 01~
vastiva do you read.......we have an urgent message........while we were passing through yo......... we encountered a............ our lead transport veered off coarse and......... in your area. our cargo was a lar......... of ...... these are to be considered extr........ da...ous we only managed to catch one of the ....... that we were transporting and upon capture it ...... the arms off of one of our bes....... .the alarming part is that i....... found near a dead carcuse o...... a polar bear..... there are around 6...5..of them heading toward what we beleive is a villag.....they will at the current rate b...... ere in 24 hou..... .we warn you again they are about .......times the size of yo... native bears and highly agre...iv....our radio has b.... severely damaged by t..... bears and we m.... end ...th.... conver...tion ...ou...signal.....br..akin...up......
.....oh...god no....pl..ase..no...he..p ...a.....h...h....h.hhhh.. ftftftftfftffttftt..
~...end transmission from evolia royal transport 01....~

~incoming transmision from evoclia royal transport 01~
vastiva do you read.......we have an urgent message........while we were passing through yo......... we encountered a............ our lead transport veered off coarse and......... in your area. our cargo was a lar......... of ...... these are to be considered extr........ da...ous we only managed to catch one of the ....... that we were transporting and upon capture it ...... the arms off of one of our bes....... .the alarming part is that i....... found near a dead carcuse o...... a polar bear..... there are around 6...5..of them heading toward what we beleive is a villag.....they will at the current rate b...... ere in 24 hou..... .we warn you again they are about .......times the size of yo... native bears and highly agre...iv....our radio has b.... severely damaged by t..... bears and we m.... end ...th.... conver...tion ...ou...signal.....br..akin...up......
.....oh...god no....pl..ase..no...he..p ...a.....h...h....h.hhhh.. ftftftftfftffttftt..
~...end transmission from evolia royal transport 01....~

"We did warn them."
"Well, they signed the waivers."

hello i am inquiring about a mystereous dissapearence of our royal transport 01 from your approximate areaif you have any news ofthere whereabouts whould you please inform mei also must warn you that they were transporting a very large shipment of our new (improved) giant polar bears these new bears have an intelegnce equivalent to that of a humanand have been equiped wioth armour and guns... really big gunsif you have seen the ship in your area then proceed with caution for the bears may have escaped if you find that the cages are intact please send me the coordanates so that we may collect them however i fear that the reason of the ships veering off coarse may be due to the bears if this is true then you may be in trouble..big trouble.

Wonderful.

Giant cyborg polar bears.

I wonder if Vastiva would reconsider allowing explosive and/or DPU rounds.

just a friendly note those whould only irritate the bears... and some may also be carrying uranium sniper rifles..sooo be carefull.........

Three blackhawk helicopters streaked 100 feet above the earth towards a herd of polar bears in the distance. From one of the helicopters the Shah of Parthia was fastend into a seat looking out towards the snows below with his Weatherby .460 hunting rifle placed in a swiveling mount. The helicopters had rotors which had been quieted as much as possible, though they had too keep their distance. When they had approached within 400 yards of the bears, the two other helicopters each fired a napalm rocket and within seconds, the rockets airbursted 100 yards in several directions of the polar bear, creating a semicircular wall of flame and leaving the bear only one direction to flee to... towards the helicopter flying 100 feet above the trees with a high powered rifle aimed directly at him... and it was rare for the Shah to miss.....

the shah should try to hunt those mutated bears they whould probably find a way to out flank him then he whould be sorry...

Collapsia would like to import as many as you can herd onto freighters, as long as you can make sure that they stay caged until we unlock them. We plan to use them for everything from futile brain-chipping experiments to weapons testing to executions to entertainment.

Also, the son of a major executive in the Collapsian Arms Conglomerate wants to go on a bear hunt. The government cannot release his name due to a domestic terrorism problem. He will be taking along a guard of six of Collapsia's toughest marines. For equipment, they will take along one all-weather tank, armed with a prototype of the Conglomerate's 20mm cannon prototypes, and 240 High Explosive Armor-Piercing rounds for it, along with a six-shot .50 caliber sniper rifle with 30 HEAP rounds (each) and four HE grenades.

They take full responsibility for anything that happens to them.

hello i am inquiring about a mystereous dissapearence of our royal transport 01 from your approximate areaif you have any news ofthere whereabouts whould you please inform mei also must warn you that they were transporting a very large shipment of our new (improved) giant polar bears these new bears have an intelegnce equivalent to that of a humanand have been equiped wioth armour and guns... really big gunsif you have seen the ship in your area then proceed with caution for the bears may have escaped if you find that the cages are intact please send me the coordanates so that we may collect them however i fear that the reason of the ships veering off coarse may be due to the bears if this is true then you may be in trouble..big trouble.

Transport was not around this planet. Might check Mars.


OOC: No dropping mutant bears on my thread. Thanks. This has gone far enough.

Collapsia would like to import as many as you can herd onto freighters, as long as you can make sure that they stay caged until we unlock them. We plan to use them for everything from futile brain-chipping experiments to weapons testing to executions to entertainment.

Also, the son of a major executive in the Collapsian Arms Conglomerate wants to go on a bear hunt. The government cannot release his name due to a domestic terrorism problem. He will be taking along a guard of six of Collapsia's toughest marines. For equipment, they will take along one all-weather tank, armed with a prototype of the Conglomerate's 20mm cannon prototypes, and 240 High Explosive Armor-Piercing rounds for it, along with a six-shot .50 caliber sniper rifle with 30 HEAP rounds (each) and four HE grenades.

They take full responsibility for anything that happens to them.

We still like our trees. Intact. Preferably vertical.

And we make no guarantee about these things.

We don't need a guarantee. If it turns out they can escape their cages, we'll re-contain them, we just don't want them to be unleashed onto our docks.

Regarding the trees: The hunter has agreed to ditch the tank idea, and mount the cannon on a powered sled, which will be much lighter and do less damage to the foliage, being unable to crush most trees. To protect the trees from the cannon, the Marines can only give you their assurances that they won't fire until they have it aimed for a solid hit on a bear and laser sighted.

A "few" trees are fine. We lose that to weather every year.

Use of, say, napalm would be a bad thing. Due to the conditions, this entire area is semi-freeze-dried, and would possibly go up like a matchbox.

As such, flechette rounds are wonderful. So are armor-piercing heads and most anti-personell rounds.

We don't like the use of HE rounds due to fire hazard.

Alright, no HE rounds.

We'll just use armor-piercing rounds, with no explosives for our cannon and sniper rifles, then. Are the grenades OK? They aren't designed to burn anything, they're designed to blast through tank armor.

Alright, no HE rounds.

We'll just use armor-piercing rounds, with no explosives for our cannon and sniper rifles, then. Are the grenades OK? They aren't designed to burn anything, they're designed to blast through tank armor.

Grenades are fine, if they're not WP or such. The Antarctic Pine can survive quite some damage without dying, and has an internal fire-suppression system which serves to prevent most small weapons from being terminal.

And a tank is fine, or a tank-pulled sled.

Current weapons list:
Tank, armed with 20mm cannon and 240 Armor-Piercing rounds.
4 grenades each
One sniper rifle each (other Collapsian personnel weapons are too low caliber)
30 .50 caliber armor-piercing bullets each.

They'll also have Collapsian snow suits (Makes you feel no cold on the peaks of Mount Collapsia, which isn't quite as cold,) and general wilderness gear. They will depart as soon as their equipment is approved.

Current weapons list:
Tank, armed with 20mm cannon and 240 Armor-Piercing rounds.
4 grenades each
One sniper rifle each (other Collapsian personnel weapons are too low caliber)
30 .50 caliber armor-piercing bullets each.

They'll also have Collapsian snow suits (Makes you feel no cold on the peaks of Mount Collapsia, which isn't quite as cold,) and general wilderness gear. They will depart as soon as their equipment is approved.

Approved.

The Nation of Jurrik's Military forces, requests enterance into your barren land to hunt these pesky Polar bears.

The items that our troops will be sent in, with are the below;

Shoulder-mounted Net Launchers (with Taser function, or flammable)
Grenade Launchers
Hand-held Grenades.
Napalm Nets
Freeze Nets
500 gallons of Liquid Nitrogen
1,500 gallons of Acid
400 of Gallons of Cyanide.
90lbs of Dry Cyanide.

C4/Other High Explosives, rigging bears only.

A second squadron of troops will carry M-16s and AK-47s and other items to make sure that they're bears and hunting ground is not disturbed.

45,000 troops requested to drop-land in a HALO format.

Signed,

Krik Guztik
President of the Nation of Jurrik

The Nation of Jurrik's Military forces, requests enterance into your barren land to hunt these pesky Polar bears.

The items that our troops will be sent in, with are the below;

Shoulder-mounted Net Launchers (with Taser function, or flammable)
Grenade Launchers
Hand-held Grenades.
Napalm Nets
Freeze Nets
500 gallons of Liquid Nitrogen
1,500 gallons of Acid
400 of Gallons of Cyanide.
90lbs of Dry Cyanide.

C4/Other High Explosives, rigging bears only.

A second squadron of troops will carry M-16s and AK-47s and other items to make sure that they're bears and hunting ground is not disturbed.

45,000 troops requested to drop-land in a HALO format.

Signed,

Krik Guztik
President of the Nation of Jurrik

Uh, napalm and fire bad for trees. That's not accepted - we don't want a fire. Freeze dried wood burns fast and easy, even if it is Antarctic Pine.

The Nation of Jurrik's Military forces, requests enterance into your barren land to hunt these pesky Polar bears.

The items that our troops will be sent in, with are the below;

Shoulder-mounted Net Launchers (with Taser function, or flammable)
Grenade Launchers
Hand-held Grenades.
500 gallons of Liquid Nitrogen (Testing Purposes once the bears are captured)
1,500 gallons of Acid
400 of Gallons of Cyanide.
90lbs of Dry Cyanide.

C4/Other High Explosives, rigging bears only.

A second squadron of troops will carry M-16s and AK-47s and other items to make sure that they're bears and hunting ground is not disturbed.

45,000 troops requested to drop-land in a HALO format.

Signed,

Krik Guztik
President of the Nation of Jurrik

~Secure Communique~

Here is our revised list of Weaponary. Please allow it as we wish to go hunting soon and bring back some of these critters to examine how they interact with our own bears. This could be interesting, to just shoot at them for the hell of it.

~Secure Communique~

Here is our revised list of Weaponary. Please allow it as we wish to go hunting soon and bring back some of these critters to examine how they interact with our own bears. This could be interesting, to just shoot at them for the hell of it.

We'll allow it, though we require a marking of areas doused with cyanide.

Telegram to Vastivan Executive Branch:

Greetings fellow polar residents. We believe that we have a solution to the Polar Bear predicament you seem to have. But, allow me to cut to the chase. History always provides a solution. Years ago, the buffalo population in North America was devastated by hunters, shooting from trains. What I am proposing is trans-Vastivan rail line. We can provide the trains and cars to run on this line. Bait will be placed a good distance from the track. When the rail car passes by the designated hunting zones, passengers with in the rail car can fire at the bear. For an extra fee, an attendant can retrieve the carcass. Your coffers will be overflowing with Polar Crowns from people eager to hunt from the safety of a rail car. Of course, we can build this track for you, at a discounted price.

So what do you say?

-Gekko Yoshinobu
Japanese Antarctican Transportation Minister

We have maglev tracks hither and yon, running on thirty foot towers or in subterrainian tunnels. Getting them repaired - or laying new ones - would mean exposure to the bears. This tends to be a bit rough on the workers.

It would also be of note, these bears will occasionally avoid such bait, and head after the sounds of, say, trains or trucks, or just about anything else.

The Nation of Hawdawg wishes to send a hunting party to help rid you of your polar bear problem.

We will send the following if allowed:

3 squads of Hawdawg Marines (24 men)
20 Polaris 750 4wd 4wheelers.
2 APC's (to serve as a sleeping shelter for men)
food, consumables needed for two week stay.

upon arrival the men will divide into two man teams for the hunt.
each two man team will be armed with:
Barrett .50 semiauto rifle
Weatherby .458 Safari Grade Bolt action rifle
(2) .454 Caskull revolvers.


Thank you for consideration.

-Josey Wales
Prime Minister
Holy Republic of Hawdawg


OOC: One thing you forgot to mention in the thread was the hide color of the bears. Polar Bears have a natural hide color of white, if so they will be easy to spot in the Pine Forest you described. Most Kodiak grizzly bears which inhabit forests like you described are brown hided making them harder to track. Just a thought. (I hunt alot myself so I think this will be a fun deal)

The Nation of Hawdawg wishes to send a hunting party to help rid you of your polar bear problem.

We will send the following if allowed:

3 squads of Hawdawg Marines (24 men)
20 Polaris 750 4wd 4wheelers.
2 APC's (to serve as a sleeping shelter for men)
food, consumables needed for two week stay.

upon arrival the men will divide into two man teams for the hunt.
each two man team will be armed with:
Barrett .50 semiauto rifle
Weatherby .458 Safari Grade Bolt action rifle
(2) .454 Caskull revolvers.


Thank you for consideration.

-Josey Wales
Prime Minister
Holy Republic of Hawdawg


OOC: One thing you forgot to mention in the thread was the hide color of the bears. Polar Bears have a natural hide color of white, if so they will be easy to spot in the Pine Forest you described. Most Kodiak grizzly bears which inhabit forests like you described are brown hided making them harder to track. Just a thought. (I hunt alot myself so I think this will be a fun deal)

OOC: Hide color of bears is white. Color of the pines is wintergreen, a very pale green, owing to the mutation which allows them to absorb most light in the short term. The snow aids the cover of the bears for the moment. Good question though.

IC: Accepted, with the understanding Vastiva takes no responsibility for what happens to you or yours.

We fully exempt you from any liability, only volunteers were selected for this trip. The Hawdawg hunting party will arrive in 2 (RL) days.


-Josey Wales
Prime Minister
Holy Republic of Hawdawg

Done.

"Contact Relorin, and tell them we've got hunting parties out near them."
"Yes, sir."

~some hours later~

"Sir, we have no answer from Relorin. For that matter, we have no contact with Relorin."
"Is the Commsat down?"
"No, sir."
"How odd. Well, send a helo over with a diplomatic pouch."
"Yes, sir."



OOC: The plot thickens...

"And with reconaissances complete, we can say absolutely: the nations of Relorin, Intellectuala, and Taun Taun have been completely overrun by the polar bears. We can find little or no evidence of any large numbers of organized people in either, though we are using our air and sea resources to recover who we can. The problem being, there's bears in those cities. Admiral Odunn Mesfin al-Din is using intermittent shore bombardments as a stopgap action."
"What of the zoos?"
"Some recovery possible, we're working on it."

OOC: Yeah, crap post, but I was tired.

*bump* for reference, as its going to continue - it's gotten worse.

Well, if you want, I could always virus-bomb you from orbit. That should take care of the bears...

Well, if you want, I could always virus-bomb you from orbit. That should take care of the bears...

OOC:Yeah, that's real helpful. :rolleyes: Remember, I do have to live here. Bioweapons are a bad idea. Particularly in Antarctica. As in "too damn cold for effective viruses and bioweapons".