Godular
07-11-2004, 19:21
In an effort to gain at least some form of profit from our recent wave of interdimensional exploration throughout the wacky region of SuperSpace, we have isolated a particularly lucrative little item that could very well phase out hand grenades.
"DEATH CONFETTI"
Bundle of 10 pellets: $250
Crate of 1000 pellets: $2250 (effective sale of "Buy 9 bundles, get one free!" further 10 percent discount for bulk orders of 100 or more crates!)
shipping and handling $3.25
Named for its deceivingly festive hot pink color, Death Confetti comes from an interesting dimension that we have recently explored in which the laws of physics have been suitably warped to cause free hydrogen to coalesce into little semi-solid pink pellets with yellow spots interspersed around the surface.
While these little pellets are completely inert in their home dimension, it turns out that removing them from their original environment does not cause them to revert to normal hydrogen and disperse. What removing them DOES do is cause them to react VERY energetically to strong kinetic impacts, as the force in the impact overcomes their natural bond and actually creates a minute fission explosion. Normal bumping and jostling will not cause them to detonate, but should one throw a pellet at the ground with enough force, or fire it with a sufficiently low level of propulsive energy, it will explode with the effective fury of a heavy plasma grenade.
Slingshots have never been deadlier.
Low cost and high yield, these little bastards will give any resistance movement a fighting edge against those evil imperialist pigdogs! Or, on the flip side of the coin, a cheap terror weapon against those insolent rebel whelps in the sewers!
"DEATH CONFETTI"
Bundle of 10 pellets: $250
Crate of 1000 pellets: $2250 (effective sale of "Buy 9 bundles, get one free!" further 10 percent discount for bulk orders of 100 or more crates!)
shipping and handling $3.25
Named for its deceivingly festive hot pink color, Death Confetti comes from an interesting dimension that we have recently explored in which the laws of physics have been suitably warped to cause free hydrogen to coalesce into little semi-solid pink pellets with yellow spots interspersed around the surface.
While these little pellets are completely inert in their home dimension, it turns out that removing them from their original environment does not cause them to revert to normal hydrogen and disperse. What removing them DOES do is cause them to react VERY energetically to strong kinetic impacts, as the force in the impact overcomes their natural bond and actually creates a minute fission explosion. Normal bumping and jostling will not cause them to detonate, but should one throw a pellet at the ground with enough force, or fire it with a sufficiently low level of propulsive energy, it will explode with the effective fury of a heavy plasma grenade.
Slingshots have never been deadlier.
Low cost and high yield, these little bastards will give any resistance movement a fighting edge against those evil imperialist pigdogs! Or, on the flip side of the coin, a cheap terror weapon against those insolent rebel whelps in the sewers!