NationStates Jolt Archive

Hello, nations of the world! We, The Nomadic Peoples Of Westerney, have excellent news for anyone who likes pretty shiney white rocks. We've found a large amount of pretty shiney white rocks! Yes, it's true. Our scientists tell us they're called "Marmalade", but we went to our ally Leperflesh's embassy and they said they're called diamonds and are valuable. We like our crusty dried mud chunks better though, so we're gonna sell the Marmalades! Or trade them, as long as you got somethin' nifty.

So send in those offers! We got a whole lot of diamonds-I dunno how much, we haven't invented the metric/farenheit whatsit measuring computizer, so I'll just say we have nine feet of diamonds. Yeah, that's good.


OOC: Keep in mind Westerney is covered in mud and is in anarchy. You could show them indoor plumbing or a clock or even bits of broken odds and ends and they'd be amazed.

EDIT: Also I think I'll stick a deadline on this. I'll think of one soon.

CURRENT OFFERS:

NONE! THE WINNER IS PIE WITH A HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO POINTS IN THE BONUS ROUND, WINNING OVER FREDDY THE SLUG!
Congrats, both of you, on a fine preformance. Get a leg up on the pile and leave me be, my yo-yo is paging me.

LIST SUBJECT TO CHANGE
(due to Groob Lermik's ADD)


News report from Westerney:

"The diamond auction is now over. Westerney has given all of the diamonds to-hmm. We seem to be working on that, His Highness Of The Mud, Groob Lermik, seems to be hyperactive and hiding in a pit. We'll be back in a few with the weather. Bob?"
"Shut up, you idiot."
"Ahahahahaha! Thanks Bob!"

The territory of Cathaynon "The Republic of Cathaynon" wishes to trade for these diamonds. We are willing to offer 500 Mobile Homes/Trailers for atleast 4 "feet" of diamonds.

Thank You-
Martin Saundins Minister of Economy

We are willing to trade you a sizable herd of sheep and a few shepherds for a 'foot' of your 'Marmalades'

Selane Yocasta

Our ally has begun counting the Marmiamonds, we have a few thousand I think.

Oooh! Some good offers already. OK, we agree to Yocasta's offer. A herd of sheep and a sheperd for five hundred diamonds?*

Cathaynon, we don't really want any houses. We have our own special mud huts.


Keep comin', suckers! Er, customers!



OOC: *Yes, the Westernese are idiots.

It's a Deal, and out of sheer kindness i will even send along a handfull of Goats.

Ooh, nifty.

The Republic of Leperflesh has certified that Westerney is indeed producing a range of grades of diamonds. Presently they are marketing lots of mixed diamonds, including about 80% industrial-grade diamonds, 18% low-end gem quality stones, and 2% high-quality gemstones. The republic of Leperflesh's professional zombie mineralogists have many centuries of experience in gemology and is willing to back up its evaluations - we will repurchase, at the original reciept price, any diamonds from unsatisfied customers, within 90 days of purchase, less a 5% restocking fee. The re-stocking fee is waived in the event of evidence that diamonds are of a lower quality than certified.

The republic of Leperflesh wishes to caution foriegn powers against unreasonable usary. While we take a very long view of economics, and we also recognize that the people of Westerney are probably better off not being in the posession of billions of Arcade Tokens' worth of wealth which they cannot properly defend, we do feel that as Westerney's ally, we have a certain responsibility and stake in their welfare.

Respectfully,

Ugnatch Blughlughl, Senior Assistant Vice Secretary of the Republic of Leperflesh National Geological, Mineralogical, and Hydrological Service and Religious Artifact Procurement Office.

Eldanor will be willing to trade twelve herds of silrochs (they're purebred white horses), which consist of twelve horses on average, for a foot of your diamonds.

High Lady
Alasse Órecalo

The Armed Republic of Crazed Marines is willing to trade you anti-demon seryum (penacyllin) to help your people deal with those inner demons for 2 "feet" of your marmalade.

We conclude that this so called marmalade is poison. We'll remove it from your land for a low fee of $2 million dollars / 100 tons. Just tell us how many tons you want us to take off your hands.

we'll offer you these 50,000 lead drums with yellow and black symbols on it

The Republic of Leperflesh has certified that Westerney is indeed producing a range of grades of diamonds. Presently they are marketing lots of mixed diamonds, including about 80% industrial-grade diamonds, 18% low-end gem quality stones, and 2% high-quality gemstones. The republic of Leperflesh's professional zombie mineralogists have many centuries of experience in gemology and is willing to back up its evaluations - we will repurchase, at the original reciept price, any diamonds from unsatisfied customers, within 90 days of purchase, less a 5% restocking fee. The re-stocking fee is waived in the event of evidence that diamonds are of a lower quality than certified.

The republic of Leperflesh wishes to caution foriegn powers against unreasonable usary. While we take a very long view of economics, and we also recognize that the people of Westerney are probably better off not being in the posession of billions of Arcade Tokens' worth of wealth which they cannot properly defend, we do feel that as Westerney's ally, we have a certain responsibility and stake in their welfare.

Respectfully,

Ugnatch Blughlughl, Senior Assistant Vice Secretary of the Republic of Leperflesh National Geological, Mineralogical, and Hydrological Service and Religious Artifact Procurement Office
Uuuh... what he said.

Eldanor will be willing to trade twelve herds of silrochs (they're purebred white horses), which consist of twelve horses on average, for a foot of your diamonds.

High Lady
Alasse Órecalo
Horses feet are too small and they'll sink in the mud. We're also running out of space in our only two forests for critters that like to run about a lot. No thanks.

The Armed Republic of Crazed Marines is willing to trade you anti-demon seryum (penacyllin) to help your people deal with those inner demons for 2 "feet" of your marmalade.
Anti-Demon serum, you say? Fascinating! We accept your offer.

We conclude that this so called marmalade is poison. We'll remove it from your land for a low fee of $2 million dollars / 100 tons. Just tell us how many tons you want us to take off your hands.
We were going to accept this offer, but we asked someone at the Leperflesh embassy and they just stared at us and sighed. We figured that means you're a con artist, so no deal, bub.

we'll offer you these 50,000 lead drums with yellow and black symbols on it
We were gonna go with this too, but that Leperflesh guy just rolled his eyes and walked away. Sorry-that sounded like a neato deal, but no can do.

We'll give you 5,000 automobiles for two feet of diamonds.

High Lady
Alasse Órecalo

We'll give you 5,000 automobiles for two feet of diamonds.

High Lady
Alasse Órecalo
Ooh! I saw those on the tele! DEAL!

Official Statement from The Soviet Democratic Empire of The Island of Rose:

We'll give you a civilization, and five herds of sheep, plus a Humvee that can go through mud.
-Minister of Commerce: Nikolai Geoff

((OOC: Westerney, I'd like to RP with you someday... it'd be interesante.))

Great! We are shipping your automobiles to you.

High Lady
Alasse Órecalo

The Rogue Nation of Glyxork will offer a large tank of mudskippers and 3 plastic shovels for, say, 2 feet of marmalade?

We'll give you a civilization, and five herds of sheep, plus a Humvee that can go through mud.
-Minister of Commerce: Nikolai Geoff
We accept the sheep and the bumblebee, Jeff. No civilization though, some guy on the street said that's BAD for people! How many Marmiamonds do you want?

((OOC: Westerney, I'd like to RP with you someday... it'd be interesante.))
OOC: Hey, nifty, I'm rising through the ranks! I feel just like Ender... can I still call you Rose De Nose?

BTW, I don't speak French.

The Rogue Nation of Glyxork will offer a large tank of mudskippers and 3 plastic shovels for, say, 2 feet of marmalade?
Deal! We dunno what those are but DEAL DEAL DEAL!
(OOC: There's someone who knows what to offer!)

Official Statement from The Soviet Democratic Empire of The Island of Rose:

We want 10 large diamonds. And it's Ge-off, not Jeff.
-Minister of Commerce: Nikolai Geoff

((OOC: Just because I am a May '04 nation means that people think I am the uber RPer. TG me for an RP idea we can do, by the way, if you get bored where you are, you're welcome to The New Roman Empire))

Err, yes, Goffe, that's what I meant.

Ten big heavy marmalades have been sent to you.

*A large shipment arrives on your coast two days later. Your workers open the crates to find ten giant jars of marmalade. They smack their heads in frustration, and prepare to tell you of Westerney's con act, but before they leave another boat arrives. The boxes are marked "WeZTrEniy". They open the new crates to find ten magnificently resplendent diamonds showered in radiance etc.*

Err, yes, Goffe, that's what I meant.

Ten big heavy marmalades have been sent to you.

*A large shipment arrives on your coast two days later. Your workers open the crates to find ten giant jars of marmalade. They smack their heads in frustration, and prepare to tell you of Westerney's con act, but before they leave another boat arrives. The boxes are marked "WeZTrEniy". They open the new crates to find ten magnificently resplendent diamonds showered in radiance etc.*

Official Statement from The Soviet Democratic Empire of The Island of Rose:

We are enjoying the diamonds. If you wish to see them, they are in Red City, inside the "Museum of Valuables". Glad doing business with you. And the marmalade was very delicious. And it's G-OF, that's how you say it!
-Minister of Commerce: Nikolai Geoff

We sent no food-type marmalade. I'm not sure where you got that stuff.


Get these diamonds while they're around, folks! We still got a couple feet!

We will give you one of them flying thing (http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/ac/rah-66-003.jpg) for 2 'foot' of marmalade. It is called a RAH-66/B Black Wolf.
It got guns and sh**.

-Billy Bob Pinetree
Minister of having fun

We will give you one of them flying thing (http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/ac/rah-66-003.jpg) for 2 'foot' of marmalade. It is called a RAH-66/B Black Wolf.
It got guns and sh**.

-Billy Bob Pinetree
Minister of having fun
Wow, neat! Deal.

How do we work those "guns" on the shiney wingless bird?


OOC: Isn't that a Comanche?

Wow, neat! Deal.

How do we work those "guns" on the shiney wingless bird?


OOC: Isn't that a Comanche?

You hit blue button and then this happens (http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/ac/rah-66--mission-image17.jpg).

-Billy Bob Pinetree
Minister of having fun

OOC: Yes. But I change the name.

The Constitutional Republic of Rotovia offers a ball yarn dipped in shiny paint, in exchange for fifity "feet" of "marmalade".

I will trade you this...bottle of water...for making mud for 6000 marmalades.

-Average citizen of Jhenova

The Republic of Leperflesh has been supplying Certificates of Authenticity, and reciepts, for all diamond exports from our allied nation, Westerney.

Recently, Groob Lermik, the nominal head of Westerney government, gracefully offered some diamonds to the Republic in exchange for services rendered, and also because they think we're swell.

The Republic of Leperflesh has gracefully accepted this offer and is noting it publicly for the purpose of full disclosure.

While Westerney does have a few 'feet' of diamonds remaining ready-to-ship, it is unclear at this time whether additional deposits or new potential mining areas are available in Westerney. We recommend any further offers for diamonds be competetive, as we believe the 'free ride' many nations have gotten out of the deal is going to end shortly.

In related news, the Republic of Leperflesh offers Westerney access to our roads, for the purposes of trying out their new automobiles. We also have one airport in our Capitol. We offer Westerney a large hangar and open flight permissions across our territory, should they wish to store flying equipment here - we are not sure if Westerney has adequate facilities for aircraft at this time.

Thank you

-Yugthoth Egglecks, Director of Sub-Governmental Leperfleshian Administrative Oversight Commitee on Westerney Affairs and Poultrey Promotions, the Republic of Leperflesh

Official teh Ninjas Statement

"Our government is willing to send 1,000 really shiny things, and 200 Portable TV sets for the small price of 100 small to meduim size diamonds."

Herbet Scarleto
Department of Commerce

We will give your people full and free access to our medical facilities for just one medium sized diamond per person.

We will give you a box full of tiny little thingies (http://img73.exs.cx/img73/6342/Nanite1.jpg) for 10 feet of these diamonds. Also, do these feet have toes, or just ankles?

OOC: So you know, they're nanites. Weee, nanites!

The Republic of Leperflesh has been supplying Certificates of Authenticity, and reciepts, for all diamond exports from our allied nation, Westerney.

Recently, Groob Lermik, the nominal head of Westerney government, gracefully offered some diamonds to the Republic in exchange for services rendered, and also because they think we're swell.

The Republic of Leperflesh has gracefully accepted this offer and is noting it publicly for the purpose of full disclosure.

While Westerney does have a few 'feet' of diamonds remaining ready-to-ship, it is unclear at this time whether additional deposits or new potential mining areas are available in Westerney. We recommend any further offers for diamonds be competetive, as we believe the 'free ride' many nations have gotten out of the deal is going to end shortly.

In related news, the Republic of Leperflesh offers Westerney access to our roads, for the purposes of trying out their new automobiles. We also have one airport in our Capitol. We offer Westerney a large hangar and open flight permissions across our territory, should they wish to store flying equipment here - we are not sure if Westerney has adequate facilities for aircraft at this time.

Thank you

-Yugthoth Egglecks, Director of Sub-Governmental Leperfleshian Administrative Oversight Commitee on Westerney Affairs and Poultrey Promotions, the Republic of Leperflesh

Yes, yes, competetive! Hence forward all offers will be compared. The best will get the diamonds! Let it be known to all.


Oh, um, by the way... we kind of broke the cars and the metal birdey. The ones that didn't blow up sank in the mud.

We have neat metal platforms in the ground now though.

Well, we'll throw in a box of THESE if you'll take our offer.
*holds up a little plastic bobbing bird that bends over and dips its beak in a little plastic pail with a piece of blue plastic set into it about halfway down*

We would like to help you mine your diamond desposits to increase your trade for just 3% of what is mined. If not, we will trade you what we call a sniper rifle
(The CM99a, Rifles (http://s6.invisionfree.com/International_Mall/index.php?showtopic=621) halfway down the page, good for hunting elephants)

Deal! We dunno what those are but DEAL DEAL DEAL!
(OOC: There's someone who knows what to offer!)

If you really don't want to keep those shiny things, I'm sure we could trade you for some bigger mudskippers (http://www.junglephotos.com/animals/reptiles/anaconda.JPG) and a few self help books (http://www.educationworld.com/a_books/images/shovel.jpg)...
(OOC: Why, thank you! *bows*)

Whoa...


You guys better come up with some good stuff, Glyxorx's new offer looks pretty awesome...

We'll give you shiny keys.

We'll give you 5 Challenger 2 Tanks. Tanks are like cars with big guns that blow stuff up. All for 200 small meduim diamonds.

We'll give you some of these:
http://img9.exs.cx/img9/7176/FlyingSwordMech.jpg

Along with a box of sharp sticks, AND the drinking birds, and talking sock monkeys. Can't resist that, can yah?

I'm going to list all the offers in order, one being the best and later numbers being less best. If I missed you tell me.

I'll also edit the first post and put this list there.


#1:
Jangle Jangle Ridge (LOADS of neat stuff; box full of sharp sticks, fancy drinking birds, sock monkeys, robots made out of cinderblocks, neenotites)

#2:
Glyxork (big "mudskippers" and "books")

#3:
Crazed Marines (1000 tin can tops and 300 mud weasels)

#4:
The Island Of Rose (shiney keys)

#5
Demonic Yoshis (800 telaphones, 30 computers, 900 digital cameras, and 1000 bateries)

#6
Teh Ninjas (tanks, a thousand shiney things, two hundred tevellsions)

#7
Rotovia (painted yarn)

#8
A Guy From Jhenova (water)



LIST SUBJECT TO CHANGE
(due to Groob Lermik's ADD)

Bumpitized!

How about 1000 shiny objects (tin can tops) and 300 mud weasels

ill trade 800 telaphones
30 computers
900 digital cameras
1000 bateries

for alot of diamonds

i shall then sprinkle the diamonds all over the streets of all major cities.
=)

Bump...


I'm gonna stick a deadline on this soon, so it isn't neverending. Also the list has been updated.

Seeing how your nation is mud-covered, we feel it will be the perfect spot to host the next annual World Bikini Mud Wrestling competition. Like the olympics, it does cost the host country to have it in their lands. In this case, the diamonds will be accepted as payment. Of course, this will also draw lots of tourism to your country during the entire length of the competition which will mean a huge increase in revenue.

Bottom line:

We get diamonds to help set up the competion.

You get money to buy all the trinkets you want,
plus 1000s of slightly dressed, mud covered beauties wrestling outside your front door.

...Sounds like more mooching to me. You get last place buster!


OOC: When do you people imagine would be a good deadline? A convenient one? I'm homeschooled, so I don't know what things are like now that everybody's back to school. Monday, maybe? Let's say Monday night for now.

...Sounds like more mooching to me. You get last place buster!

Obviously you do not know a good deal when it presents itself. Well, good day and good luck finding another use for all that wasted mud.

*before the phone hangs up you hear a mutter "whole darn country must be gay..."*

Dear Westerney:

We'd be willing to offer 2,000,000,000 helium balloons in assorted colors for your people to enjoy seeing float around your great country or which can be used by your people for talking funny to their kids and friends. In addition to the balloons, we can throw in 5,000 "Big Mouth Billy Bass" fish wall hangings that sing "Take me to the River" and "Don't Worry, Be Happy" whenever you walk by them, along with 10,000 AA batteries and 10,000 lava lamps for 7 feet of your diamo . . . marmalades. Oh, yeah, one last thing, if you'd like a pet ferret, we can arrange for some of those as well. They are cute, furry, snuggly and good at catching mice.

sincerely,
King 'Lude II
Mauiwowee

Hmm... what would Westerny want more than Jangle's unbelievably awesome stuff...

think... think...

maybe a metric ton of silly string (http://www.exult.co.uk/images/23754.jpg), a box of light up yo yo's (http://www.exult.co.uk/images/25542.jpg), a giant cow from some weird nation somewheres that we found on our doorstop one midsummer morning (http://march.uline.net/rediculous-2.htm), and a fleet of rocket powered sleds? (http://www.the-rocketman.com/rkt_sled3.JPG)

Whoa... I'll update the list in a little bit (say tonight-ish), there are some great new offers... it'll take a lot of thought.

:eek:


*Pictures all the silly string, and then pictures all the balloons*
So... hard...

Whoa... I'll update the list in a little bit (say tonight-ish), there are some great new offers... it'll take a lot of thought.

:eek:


*Pictures all the silly string, and then pictures all the balloons*
So... hard...

With all due respect, this isn't a real choice, is it? Surely you realize when you finish The Republic of Leperflesh will make you clean up the mess you made with the Silly String, however the balloons will just float away. Plus, Silly String won't let you talk in a cool way with your kids and friends. Finally, just as an added enticement, we'll make sure 1,000,000 of the balloons are made of shiney, silver, mylar!! OK?

Oh, yeah, one last thing, rocket sleds are only good in the snow, balloons are good all year 'round.

The USSCR will not give Westerney various worthless junk, but will pay 2 billion dollars per year if we are allowed to ship in our midgets (Dwarves) to mine the mud.

OH MY GOD! MY HEAD HURTS! TOO MANY PEOPLE! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!


*Groob Lermik splits all the diamonds between Mauiwowee and Glyxork and grabs the silly string, balloons, rocket sleds, singing fish, and yo-yo's. He then hides in a very large hole.*




News to all of them from Westerney:

We have no diamonds. Ziltch.

Go. Away. Now.

The Marines leave, looking disappointed having no diamond for their girlfriends/wives.

OOC: You are aware that, without the "DeBeers" diamond cartel existing in NationStates, Diamonds are worth no more than a stick of gum, if not less?

OOC: You are aware that, then, a "Debeers" needs to be created.

OOC: So, if there's no cartel for an item, the item is worthless? That's... interesting. I'm not sure that's entirely accurate... there isn't a cartel for EVERY product available on Nation States-in fact, I've seen none.


What's your angle, mister?

What's your angle, mister?

He's trying to trick you out of the shiney mylar balloons, that's his angle! Pay no attention to that man hiding behind the curtain.

**begins a cartel for shiney mylar balloons**

**begins a cartel for shiney mylar balloons**
Fool! We have far more than you! WE are the balloon cartel!
*Runs around in circles and yells things a bit*

Diamonds are absolutely worthless since they are not rare. They are extremely common. DeBeers has warehouses in Johannesburg filled with diamonds. They control the rate at which they are released into the economy, therefore controlling the price. It is similar to the UAE Oil Cartel.

The diamonds are worth something because of their sheer size. With the diamonds you gave us, we're updating a few orbital weapons....:)

The diamonds are worth something because of their sheer size. With the diamonds you gave us, we're updating a few orbital weapons....:)

Fascinating!

*Orders research on diamond launching trebuchets*

Diamonds would shatter. They may be HARD, but they are extremely brittle.

(sounds of crappy jazz like music with loud anoucer) Do you need workers? Why pay your hard earned savings when you can force those damn lazy ingrates to work for free. here at Slaver Pete we have the best condintioned slaves just ask Himmler Von Hitler
" Vhat? yes ve use de slaves. Vhy Gott himself says to use them and Slaver petes has the best"

See yall come on down now ya here, just east of I-69 and SS way.

"Slaver Pete's! We Breed 'em! you Beat 'em!"

Can they fire diamond launchers?




...Can they be fired from diamond launchers?

WTF is a diamond launcher?

Can the People's Republic of Warta Endor make some Profit ???:D

The Republic of Leperflesh does not make Westerney clean up after itself, unless it makes a mess within the Republic of Leperflesh. We really don't mind if the Westernese wish to fortify their mud with copious quantities of silly string residue and deflated mylar balloons.

The Republic of Leperflesh wishes to point out to naysayers the following facts regarding diamonds:

The Diamonds, as with all commodities, have a value preciseley equal to what the market will bear. This thread is a representation of the market and the transactions therein have set a value on diamonds equal to what they were traded for, precisely.

Now that the Westerney diamond supply is closed, Diamonds may obtain a new value, depending on market forces and other available supplies.

Glibrargh Glughlughl-Jones, Petty Magistrate-Secretary of the Republic of Leperflesh Marketing District Division and Multiplication Assistance and Trade Goods Value Calculation Bureau, SouthWest Region.

OOC: supply and demand in Nationstates is largely unrelated to that of the real world. DeBeers may really have warehouses of diamonds, and they certainly raise the price (on earth) through control of the supply. However, in Nationstates, the total population is on the order of several trillions, there is no accurate means to measure the total supply of diamonds, no means to measure the demand, and no complete accounting of the actual uses of diamonds - certainly there are nations claiming highly implausible science-fiction inventions which, for all we know, could require lots of diamonds in their manufacture. For that matter, there could be a widespread global fad diet which calls for powdered diamond to be added to food for health reasons. Speculation on the matter is mostly academic and certainly pointless.

Diamond launchers up for grabs! Any takers?

Why would you need a diamond launcher?

I'll take a diamond launcher and 1000 projectiles.

*invades, knowing that diamond projectiles are useless since they would shatter on impact.*

Anyone considering invading Westerney should take note of The Republic of Leperflesh's ~130 million zombie citizens. We stand ready to protect our ally, Westerney.

OOC: Yes, we all know and fear the great and all-powerful nation of... LeperFlesh.

yes, and if you even set foot on either of their soil, I will vaporize your men with my new orbital lazer platform.....which was focused by the diamonds that I was given.....

I Robert Grey of Englandy offer a big metel thing that scoops up mud and turns it into nice shaqped objects for just 2 feet of the diamonds!!!

OOC: And don't you love the fact that i can ignore practically anybody for futuretech or fantasytech? Also, why the hell would you use diamonds to focus anything? Glass works just as well. In fact, concentrated laser would BURN diamond, as it does in real life. If you focus a concentrated laser beam unto a diamond, it turns into charcoal.

OOC: And don't you love the fact that i can ignore practically anybody for futuretech or fantasytech? Also, why the hell would you use diamonds to focus anything? Glass works just as well. In fact, concentrated laser would BURN diamond, as it does in real life. If you focus a concentrated laser beam unto a diamond, it turns into charcoal.

Well, we're using the diamonds we got from our ballon swap to make "disco balls" :D

OOC: Well, as long as you arent exposing them to large amounts of energy (Such as an oven or a laser), they shouldn't burn. Diamonds are like... clear coal, if you want to think of it that way. They don't ignite though. They just burn.

We shall develop hot scorching diamond projectiles if we manage to find more normal clear marmalades. We shall then test them, and perhaps sell them depending on their effectiveness.


In the meantime though, thanks all for giving us support when the Attican Empire attacked. He left, though; all he found was mud (logically, because our island is covered in it) and our people (also logically because we live here), and he wasn't interested in either of those.


Also we got spied on (OOC: I think that was related to a different thread) by another country, but he didn't like what he saw either, I think (OOC: If he does I'm going to ignore him anyway, there's no logical reason to invade me).

I didn't attack. That was a sarcastic remark I made for some peoples ignorance on the properties of crystalized carbon. Diamond is useless for weapons:

1. It has a very high thermal conduction ratio... it is almost always cold, because it conducts heat from one surface to another very well... almost 1000x better than water.

2. It is very brittle. Hit a diamond with a hammer, or throw it at a wall, it will shatter.

3. It burns. High Temperatures or a high powered laser will burn diamond.

Quartz usually works pretty well, especially for optical lenses.

OOC: And don't you love the fact that i can ignore practically anybody for futuretech or fantasytech? Also, why the hell would you use diamonds to focus anything? Glass works just as well. In fact, concentrated laser would BURN diamond, as it does in real life. If you focus a concentrated laser beam unto a diamond, it turns into charcoal.

Not really, especially when there is NO AIR FOR IT TO BURN IN! The diamond is also better in not shattering when hit by a blunt object.

OOC: Ok, so why dont we put your hand in a chamber devoid of oxygen, then foxus a laser beam on it. The same thing would happen to the diamond. It might not burn persay, but it very well may melt, or the heat would cause its molecules to rearrange themselves in some way.

Also, Diamond is far more brittle than Quartz. Tap Diamonds with a hammer, they shatter. Tap quartz, it does not.

I spoke with several people about this, and I received a few responses:

"Well, if you're talking about a laser with THAT high of a power output, you'd probably want to use a magnetic field to contain it."

"Depends on if the laser is reaching the energy for the diamond to be destroyed."

"I believe the reason diamonds aren't used for lenses is because A: they're really hard to find in decent enough quantity and size, and B: Naturally occuring diamons have flaws."

"Natural diamonds, no matter how perfect, would rape a laser, they'd refract the living hell out of it."

Suggestions to use instead of diamond:

"Right now I think they're using glass/polymers."
"Silver plating, don't use a lens."

"Natural diamonds, no matter how perfect, would rape a laser, they'd refract the living hell out of it."


depends on how the diamond is cut, and the light source

Natural Diamonds are not perfect, hence they are poor lenses. ALL diamonds have imperfections, except for synthetic.

OOC: I've got loads of quartz in the creek in my back yard-I've never seen diamonds, but quartz is fairly hard. Not like, uber-hard, but as hard as most rocks. I've thrown quartz on quartz and neither broke, just scraped.

If diamonds are so fragile, though, why is cutting a diamond apparently such a great feat?

There is a difference between hardness and fragility --- Diamond is the HARDEST mineral, meaning it can only be scratched by diamond, and can scratch any other mineral, but it is very FRAGILE, having 4 perfect angles of cleavage, meaning that if you strike it on any of those angles, it will split in half. If you strike a diamond with a hammer or shoot it thru a gun against a hard surface, it will shatter. Also, natural diamonds are suprisingly impure.

And diamonds burn, then? Why is that? Why does coal burn?

Diamonds and coal are essentially the same thing, compressed carbon. Burning is simply the physical reaction of combining one or more substances.

And heat (which can be expressed as Energy).

OH MY GOD! MY HEAD HURTS! TOO MANY PEOPLE! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!


*Groob Lermik splits all the diamonds between Mauiwowee and Glyxork and grabs the silly string, balloons, rocket sleds, singing fish, and yo-yo's. He then hides in a very large hole.*




News to all of them from Westerney:

We have no diamonds. Ziltch.

Go. Away. Now.


You sure? Don't want any of the cool things? We have fake vomit!

OOC:

Actually, that one country never claimed to be using diamonds for focusing lasers.

They are using diamonds for their orbital 'Lazers' which clearly are something entirely different. There's a z instead of an s. It could be anything. He could be using the resonant frequencies of the diamonds to focus Warp z-beams into special Lazers. Or something.

Also throwing a diamond against a wall would not break it - it would bounce off the wall. Definitely you can easily crush a diamond between two hard surfaces such as a hammer and an anvil, but softer surfaces are more likely to just give way to the diamond. Especially a smaller diamond.

And coal is not just carbon - it has lots of sulphur and other stuff in it too.

And yes, you need oxygen to have flames (fire is, by definition, 'rapid oxidization'). If you heated up a diamond in a vacuum it would get hotter and hotter, and once it got to a certain temperature it would turn into graphite (in a solid-state reaction, e.g., without melting). If there are impurities (and there probably are) with lower melting points, it might crack at a lower temperature.

After all, diamonds form in molten magma below the surface of the earth - very far down, typically in the upper mantle, in fact. The thing is, the carbon has to be under immense pressure to form a diamond.

In the presence of oxygen you can oxidize (burn) a diamond though, that is true. But it would be an endothermal reaction (you'd have to continually apply more heat) because the carbon-carbon covalent bonds are stronger than the carbon-oxygen bonds you'd be creating (Carbon monoxide, carbon dioxide, etc). So you can't light a diamond with a match and then watch it burn. You could burn a diamond by focusing a welding torch on it though, I would guess.

I said lazer as in the British term "laser". Give me a break, I'm from the Southern part of the USA. Also, i am using it to focus the beam, and its working just fine. :P

The Republic of Hawdawg would be willing to trade 3,454,328 used, but refurbished Laz-y-Boy Recliners recovered in the fabric of your choice for 10 feet of diamonds.

Waiting for your response,

The Republic of Hawdawg
Furniture Minister

I said lazer as in the British term "laser". Give me a break, I'm from the Southern part of the USA. Also, i am using it to focus the beam, and its working just fine. :P

We don't use "Lazer" in the US either. Maybe the south IS more backwards than I thought :)

OOC: Kass, we do. I've seen it splled like that from Florida to Pennsylvania to Arizona (and in NASA, I live close to a NASA facility).

*flips Kass the bird for the South comment*

Oh, and before you make fun of the South, it was the SOUTH who sent man to the moon. Redstone Arsenal in Huntsville, AL; Cape Canaveral, FL; and Houston, TX. All three are in the South and were essential to man stepping foot on the moon.

OOC:

Laser is an acronym standing for "l(ight) a(mplification by) s(timulated) e(mission of) r(adiation)." So anyone spelling it with a z is just wrong, period.

And space launch pads are in the south because putting anything into geostationary orbit requires the launchpad to be as close to the equator as possible. Also equatorial launches provide the best boost for spacecraft being sent out into the rest of the solar system. It would have been really stupid to put launch pads someplace farther north.

But don't let facts, information, etc. get in the way of your roleplaying, guys. After all, my entire population is Undead.

Then how do you explain Marshall Spaceflight Center in Huntsville? It doesn't even have a launch center within 150 miles of it...
But hey, I just spell it differently because I was ignorant to the fact otherwise before and its just set in as habit.

The south was also responsible for the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Americans because they wanted to keep slaves. I am sure you are very proud of that, as well.

1) The North was just as guilty as the South
2) It WAS NOT a war over slavery, it was over the 10th Amendment and states rights
3) I am not proud about slavery. My family never owned slaves. We were the poor and downtrodden white share-croppers who couldn't afford to own slaves. I do not support slavery. I, however, do support a state's right to make its own decisions.
4) The emancipation did not free slaves. It freed slaves captured by Yankee troops to cripple the South as well as turning the war into a "moral issue" over slavery. This was, again, not the reason for the war, just a factor.

1) The North was just as guilty as the South
2) It WAS NOT a war over slavery, it was over the 10th Amendment and states rights
3) I am not proud about slavery. My family never owned slaves. We were the poor and downtrodden white share-croppers who couldn't afford to own slaves. I do not support slavery. I, however, do support a state's right to make its own decisions.
4) The emancipation did not free slaves. It freed slaves captured by Yankee troops to cripple the South as well as turning the war into a "moral issue" over slavery. This was, again, not the reason for the war, just a factor.

1. Yes, just as guilty of holding together the Union.
2. Yes, state rights over slavery. Which were false worries anyways.
3. State's rights about what decisions? I guess you would rather be in a confederacy.
4. When did I ever mention the Emancipation?

1) But just as guilty as the South still. They lost over 2x times the amount the South did because Yankees are PI$$ poor shots
2) Look, that battle of states rights still rages on today. You would know that if you paid attention to US politics (I know you're British, but it's wise to follow your biggest ally's politics. I follow International politics as well)
3) Actually, I would. It is more Lassiez-faire
4) Just used to reinforce my above points.

OOC: I'm British? That's news to me. Since when is Chicago in the British Isles? The North lost more men because of the succession of piss-poor generals we had. Also, we were a Conferacy at one time. Look up "Articles of Confederation". Worst. Government. Ever.