NationStates Jolt Archive


Jaratia's Little Tykes Chemical and Biological Weapons Storefront

Jaratia
15-08-2004, 10:55
Hey,heyhey,kids! Busty the Bum here,and have I got the deal of the century for you!Ever wanted one of those cool biological missiles to wreak havoc upon your enemies?Damn right you did!But you didn't have enough pocket money to buy it!Awwww....Ain't that sad?But now,you can have one!Just check out my Busty the Bum Bio-Chem Storefront!YAY!

E-hemm.Right.Anyway,I've seen lots of little guy nations queing up for bilogical,chemical weapons,but never receiving them because "u r t00 smal!"
I will be selling to anyone,ANYONE except to those under 30 million(I DO have a small shred of decency,contrary to popular belief).Also,I will only be selling the "basic" biological-chemical weapons.Uh-huh.That means no smallpox or anything of that caliber.Oh,and read the disclaimer before you accuse me of anything.I'll make it extra big so that you can't miss it.
DISCLAIMER:THE ARMED EMPIRE OF JARATIA IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY DAMAGE CAUSED BY THEIR PRODUCTS!ONCE THE ITEM HAS BEEN RECEIVED,WE HAVE NO POWER OVER IT!TAKE IT UP WITH THE OFFENDING NATION,NOT ME!
And now,onto the products:

Anthrax
Standard terrorist bioweapon.Deadly enough in large doses.Is likely to kill if inhaled or digested.
Cost: 100,000 $ per kilo

Tularemia
Not a very dangerous virus,but powerful enough to be considered biological weapon.Is an endemic in North America and some parts of Eurasia.
Cost: 15,000 $ per kilo


Ricin
Ricin is a poison manufactured by the castor bean.Likely to cause many urban casualties if spread smartly.
Cost: 60,000 $ per kilo


Bubonic Plague
You really don't know what bubonic plague is?Thought so.Weaponized form of the infamous bubonic plague.
Cost: 100,000 $ per kilo


Mustard Gas
A deadly chemical weapon first used in WWI.Causes blistering of the skin and,if exposed to prolonged exposure,will blind and finally kill.Not too effective a chemical weapon.
5,000 $ per kilo.


I'll add more as time goes on.This,for now,is it.May consider selling some more high-caliber stuff to older nations.
Jangle Jangle Ridge
15-08-2004, 12:21
*little Johnny sucks his face to the window, looking at all the neat weapons of evilness*
*Johnny is sheparded away from window by mother with a loud squeaking noise.
Sephrioth
15-08-2004, 14:10
rufus's son cloud looks throuhth the window in awe his father the ruller of sephrioth says ''cloud we have better wmds at home come on.'' The boy retorts with ''aww dad''
Jangle Jangle Ridge
15-08-2004, 14:28
>.< Burned!
Jaratia
16-08-2004, 11:23
Murmble,grumble."Stupid parents...I don't doubt we'll even have to use OUR money to make the canisters look pretty to please them!"