NationStates Jolt Archive

Mountain Bay, Roycelandia

Outside the Lakeside Shopping Centre

The van hadn't attracted much attention as it sat idling outside the entrance to The Trading Post, one of the largest department stores in Roycelandia.

The men and women inside would have attracted attention had anyone been able to see them. The wonders of tinted windows prevented this, of course.

"OK folks, this goes off just like we practiced. Lots of noise, maximum effect, and a quick departure. Are we ready?"

The people in the back of the van, all wearing military style combat fatigues and gas masks, nodded.

"Let's do it!"

The opened the door and charged into the store, which, by virtue of planning, was packed with customers taking advantage of the sale.

The leader- codename Mr. Black- Raised his Tommy Gun in the air and fired a burst into the ceiling, whilst the others with him covered the exits.

"OK everyone, listen up!" he shouted to the panicked customers.

"Look how busy this store is! You're making life very difficult for the poor staff here, all crowding in here at once and annoying them by simply being here. And you're all going to pay for it."

He paused for a moment. "Each of you will take out your wallets or purses and empty out all the money in there. Now."

A couple of people tried to resist and were smacked in the head with rifle butts, spraying blood everywhere. "Don't try and resist, or you'll be even sorrier!"

It only took a minute or two for everyone to have their money out.

Mr. Black was pleased. "Right. Give all your money to the staff. They work long and hard, and you people make their jobs more difficult. As such, they get all your money as compensation."

He turned to the staff. "Take it, it's yours. You won't be harmed."

The terrified staff grabbed all the customer's money and fled.

Mr. Black turned to the rest of the camouflaged people with him. "Get ready to evacuate."

He turned his attention back to the customers. "All of you in the corner. NOW!" The customers did so. "Wait!" one of the others- Ms. Yellow- said. "Look how many bags this one has! She's bought heaps of stuff!"

Mr. Black glowered evilly at the shopper. "Make an example of her."

"No!" screamed the female customer as she was shot twice in the chest with rubber bullets, and collapsed crying and moaning onto the ground.

"This is very simple. There will be no more busy stores. If we ever, ever catch large groups of customers in the same place again, we'll injure every single customer in there and then burn the store down. You've been warned: Don't buy things from busy stores!"

And with that, they threw Tear Gas into the crowd of customers and escaped in the confusion, pulling away from the shopping centre as the police arrived.

So far speculation is rife as to who the masked group were, but the current theory is a group of disgruntled shop assistants who have completed their military service and decided to enact their revenge on Customers.

The retail staff concerned in the hold-up promptly resigned their jobs and moved to Coral Palm Island, declining all interviews in the process.

Vexia is deeply alarmed and a tad amused at thisstrange new vigilante crimewave.
"Personally, this crime smacks of Neo-socialist leanings to me. There obviously attempting to undermine capitalist businesses in Roycelandia, and are doing this through terror and fear.
They may, in time, even attempt to cripple the economy itself.
Despite the bizarreness of their methods and stated goals, i think we can say safely that this is a Terrorist situation."
The Ministry of Foreign Affairs offers the services of three squads of Elite CTCA(Counter Terrorist Covert Assault) Teams, trained here in Vexia.
They will gladly work with you to find and stop these Socialist Terrorist wannabes.

Roycelandia: Where wierd things happen every day.

OOC: I dont think it beats the time i snuck into my friends house, no one was in, with the single purpose fo dropping off ten pounds i owed her. Breaking and depositing, with intent to donate....

LOL man that story cracks me up. Its like a more demented version of robin hood exept instead of giving to the poor he gives to the overworked ahahhaha. Anyways at least nobody was killed thats the good thing. The bad thing is that they threatened to burn down stores. If you have any fingerprints or DNA on these individuals all you have to do is give it to us and we'll make sure they don't flee to Aelov if you start cracking down on them.

Federal Security Bureau Headquarters, Mansur Street, Baghdad, United Elias

Deep in the labyrinth of corridors of the massive FSB building, known affectionately ;) as the 'Evil Empire' and 'Arabia's Lubyanka' a pair of researchers hurredly typed a briefing note for their boss, the Director of the 'Allies and Friendly Nations' department of the External Affairs Division. It seemed that an event had occured in Mountain Bay, Roycelandia, the nature of which was of minor interest for the FSB who harboured obssesions bordering on fanatical for any sort of socialism, terrorism or organised crime. Which categories this fell into was not entirely clear, yet. Of course there was nothing they could do except keep an eye on it.

Suddenly a call came in from the Elias Embassy in Roycelandia.

A few minutes later, the researchers knocked on the glass doors of the director's office, one of the few with windows to the outsdie world, "Sir, twe've just recieved word, the wife of a United Elias diplomat has been injured in the mall attack. Reports are that two rubber bullets striking her in the chest so its critical."

The Director sighed, "Okay listen up, I'm going to call someone there and offer our full co-operation and assistance. Its not likely but just in case any of these people is trying to escape to here, I want the Department of Immigration notified, and any Roycelandians entering in the next few days are to be interviwed at length before being allowed entry. Next I want you to run a database search for any of our citizens in Roycelandia for any suspicious records. If you find anything on anyone, immediately contact the embassy there and we'll try and locate them just in case.

"We need to know why she was the only one injured, co-incidental or purposeful so find out what you can. Get someone from the embassy to update on this woman's condition every thirty minutes. Also tell the embassy to increase their security posture, I doubt we were directly targeted but its not worth taking a risk. Also send out an advisory to Elias citizens in Roycelandia not to travel to shopping malls or similar areas, this is going to happen again for sure."

We have carefully revieved your message, sounds very alarming indeed.
We suspect incident might be linked to an anarcho-socialist terrorist group and recommed immediate further examinations.
We are offering a voluntary support of 200 men from Holy Torsg God's Anti-Terror Task Force.

Emperor Torsg XXX of Holy Torsg Empire

OOC:
based on this and the stupidity Laws we are delaing with soemone else who works in the retail industry...

Imperial Palace, Port Royal, Roycelandia

His Majesty didn't like Bad News. Especially when it interrupted his viewing of Family Guy or Futurama, as this particular spot of Bad News had.

"Anyway, they didn't kill anyone, but it turns out they shot the wife of the Elian Ambassador..."

His Majesty uttered a word that one doesn't usally expect to hear coming from the ruler of a large empire.

"Fine. Find these Terrorists, and deal with them. And offer my apologies to the Elians."

Meanwhile, the Imperial SAS had been called to a busy petrol station in Kingstowne, where fuel was on sale for 10c/litre cheaper than anywhere else in town. The side-effect of this was a minor traffic jam from all the cars trying to get into the petrol station.

The Retail Liberation Front, as the Media had dubbed the mysterious group, had arrived at the petrol station's packed forecourt in a 4WD (later revealed to have been stolen), fired automatic weapons into the air, and made all the motorists hand over their money and drive off without buying petrol. The money from the customers was then given to the staff, and oddly enough, motorists stuck in the traffic jam who weren't buying petrol.

By the time the ISAS arrived, the RLF had left in the 4WD, leaving a lot of very angry and scared customers. A Security Roadblock further down the road, set up to prevent the escape of the RLF, exchanged fire with the group briefly, but sustained no casualties as the terrorists were firing non-lethal rounds. Opinion in Roycelandia is divided as to what can be done, with business owners and customers terrified of the group, whilst the working class and staff view them as folk heroes.

Imperial Security Bureau HQ, Port Royal, Roycelandia

"Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, what do we do about this?" Asked the head of the ISB, Angela Ford.

The Roycelandian Attorney General, Trent Scott, spoke up. "If you ask me, they sound like..." his eyes glowered "...Communists."

"Oh, for Christ's sake! It's always Communists with you, isn't it? Arab Raiders steal priceless treasure and it's Communists. Petrol prices fluctuate and it's Communists. We lose at Cricket, and it's Communists. What about the time we went through and entire tin of coffee in a day? You said that was Communists too!" said an exasperated Sir Duane Dibley, head of the Imperial Intelligence Service.

"Well we didn't drink it all, did we? So who did? Obviously Comm..." replied Trent, looking very smug before he was cut off in mid sentence by the ringing of a phone.

Angela answered the phone. She spoke for a few minutes, then replaced the receiver. "That was His Majesty. He wants the ISAS on this one, with orders to deliberately incapacitate in an very painful way. Furthermore, the Police will be stationed at all major shopping malls in an unobtrusive manner to protect customers."

Dutch Elm Island, off the coast of Roycelandia

"They're calling us the Retail Liberation Front now" said a young woman, after switching off the TV. Mr. Black smiled. "Excellent. Doesn't change our goals... an end to the Profit-Based Retail Machine! An End to the Oppression of the Workers! Oh, and a tropical island with blackjack and hookers, too."

"Ahem" said several of the women in the room. Mr. Black raised an eyebrow. "It's a metaphor. Island Paradise, where we can do whatever we want. Anyway, we need to plan our next raid..."

OOC: Beleive it or not, I don't actually work in Retail. I used to (is it that obvious?), but I'm sure anyone who's ever had to deal with customers can relate to this particular RP...

New Gibborim, The Igovian Soviet Commonwealth of Beth Gellert

"Pfft, consumerists!"
"Don't start, Graeme."
"Their own system is kicking itself in the teeth, look! Look!" Said the elder half of the Igovian father and son political enterprise, shaking a copy of his ISKRA! newspaper in front of his long-suffering partner, Vera.
"Yes, dear, the consumerists are in their final phase and will probably collapse from Lusaka out, we know, dear. Did you use the last teabag, already?"
"What? No tea? F*%# consu..."