NationStates Jolt Archive

TNS Broadcast:

At Pyongyang, Kim Jong-Il's regime was totally annihilated after a rebellion incited by buckets of Kentucky Fried Chicken overthrew the poofy-haired dictator.

Tyrandis National Intelligence Agency operatives, working in concert with anti-communist movements in N. Korea, distributed the tasty meat to every person willing to aid the rebellion.

On July 20th, a mass uprising, beginning with a military coup, began. One day later, Kim Jong-Il's head was on a pike. There were no deaths, excluding the dictator himself.

Records by bean counters at the GAO have indicated that roughly 8/10 Koreans took up arms in return for fried chicken. Estimated costs are roughly around three billion dollars.

Immediately, the new government signed a treaty of annexation by Tyrandis, in return for humanitarian and political aid.

Under the terms of the deal, Tyrandis will assume full control of North Korea within five years. During the transitional period, an interim government will be established until full Tyrandisan control of the country can be assured.

OOC: I'm not sure whether to laugh, or be annoyed...

OOC: You were supposed to laugh :p

President J.L. applauds Tyrandis for ousting the totalitarian dictator. Save some chicken for us, though!

OOC:

What's the link to the Zarbian peace talks? And you would haven't the link to the Zarbia war thread would you?

IC:

"Do you have any orange chicken?"

OOC: This is something that would probably pop up in sim city 4 just for laughs lol

OOC: link to peace talks: http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=339724

Lost the thread to war, sorry :/

IC:

Tyrandis has shipped one hundred pounds of orange chicken to the Maccabee Empire, and fifty buckets of KFC to Roach-Busters. No reason was given, other than to celebrate the annexation.

The Central Directorature, DaKhiem, The Choson People's Republic of Dra-pol (North Korea)

"Oh, the other North Korea."
"Indeed. Unlikely, but it does ring strangely true... you don't suppose, comrade, that anybody will remember my speech, last month?"
"Comrade Director?"
"I... promised that if bourgeois processed bowl-clogging chicken products ever fell on DaKhiem, I would..."
"Ah, the Kim wig?"
"Indeed."
"Prepare an Anatov, get me a bowl of kimchi... make it big... damn it, somebody scheduel a diplomatic flight over Tyrandis!"

OOC: What is DaKhiem? A city?

OOC: Yeah, the capital of the CPRD, in the mountains east of Pyongyang, in our little universe. Famous for... eh... being closed off for thousands of years... being flattened by bombs and missiles three times to little effect... and being the bait in a trap that captured an entire Raysian airborne force. [/a brief history of a teeny tiny city]

bump

Congratulations for removing this nasty regieme, and for the creative use of fried foods too.

IDF demands that Tyrandis comes clean and tells us if the fried chicken was KFC Extra Crispy, grocery store deli, homemade, or Popeye's chicken. Failure to answer this tasty question can lead to war. J/J

Tyrandis contracted KFC because Extra Crispy is just so good.

TNS Broadcast:

The 1st Carrier Group, along with the Tyrandisan delegation, has arrived in the South China Sea. They are expected to arrive in Free Pyongyang within one day.

Meanwhile, cleanup crews are hard at work trying to wipe the mass of chicken bones that have littered the countryside.

Tyrandis contracted KFC because Extra Crispy is just so good.
good, anything less and I'd have to charge you with war crimes.

bump

[OOC: I just found this thread again, and I read it - it was hilarious. I'm sorry for bumping it back up, but it was such a great thread!]

OOC: thx! I needed a good laugh! :p

OOC: This thread kicks all possible ass! You are a genius!

Maybe I should conquer Cuba with a bunch of Whoppers... ;)

Maybe I should conquer Cuba with a bunch of Whoppers... ;)

And I'll conquer China with Big Macs! :D