NationStates Jolt Archive

As Eva walked down the aisle, all who beheld her immeasurable beauty were so transfixed by her pulchritude they were unable to move. The entire audience was in a trance, murmuring among themselves how lovely she was, and how lucky President J.L. was. Statesmen and diplomats from many lands across the globe watched in awe as she approached the altar, where J.L. stood with a huge smile on his face. J.L. turned and saw some representatives of his closest allies in the front row, and he waved. They waved back.
"I'm the luckiest man alive," J.L. thought.
Vice-President Cyprian, the best man, patted J.L. on the back and said, "I am very happy for you, sir."
J.L. sighed. "Dude, we've been friends for how many years? Just call me 'J.L.'!"
"Uh, yes sir, J.L."
The Secretary of Technology, T. Fitten, wept uncontrollably. "It's all s-s-sooo...b-BEAUTIFUL! WAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Jennings, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, patted Fitten on the back, and felt so embarrassed he wished he could disappear.
When Eva reached the altar, Premier Vang cleared his throat and presided over the exchange of vows. Finally, with a thin smile on his face, he said softly, "I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss-"
"-MY ASS!!!!!" a vulgar voice shouted.
Before anyone could reply, they heard an excruciatingly loud explosion as part of the ceiling disintegrated, raining chunks of debris upon the helpless inhabitants, killing many of them instantly. Ravenous flames raced across the walls, devouring everything in sight, and thousands of panicked guests ran around flailing their arms uselessly and screaming deliriously in an attempt to escape the inferno.
One of J.L.'s most trusted generals ran over to him, looking exhausted. He saluted J.L. "Sir!"
"What is it, General Orozco?"
"W-W-We've been hit by a missile!"
"Any idea who fired it?" J.L. asked.
"No sir, we're still looking into it!"
"W-"
"Look, sir, you can chitter-chatter later, now, our priority is Operaton Evacuation! We must vacate the premises immediately!"
Ten minutes later, everyone had been evacuated. Fortunately, no foreign visitors were killed during the catastrophe, but 151 RB citizens met an unfortunate end.
Back at the Presidential Palace, President J.L., his heart burning with rage, began writing out a proposal which he would send to the Parliament, a proposal requesting a declaration of war...

Okay, so my RP-ing skills suck, but c'mon, work with me people...I'm bored out of my mind!

Official Message from the Minister of Foreign Relations

We are deeply saddened by this attack to sabotage your wedding. We also hope that whoever did this, be brought to justice, and given a just punishment.

Official Message from the Minister of Foreign Relations

We are deeply saddened by this attack to sabotage your wedding. We also hope that whoever did this, be brought to justice, and given a just punishment.

Thank you.

Official Statement from the Island of Rose:

Those bastards! That is the best porn video you can buy! That thing has high production values! We pledge to help you anyway we can, we will punish them for ruining your wedding! May they burn in eternal hell!
-Minister of Foreign Relations: Rosta Einvach

Official Statement from Red Tide
We were planning too give you a Banshee sports car as a wedding gift but offer our consolodences... and 2 instead of one Banshee.

Thanks, guys.

SPECIAL NOTE: I feel like a war. Anyone want to be 'responsible' for the attack? (First come, first served)

Thanks, guys.

SPECIAL NOTE: I feel like a war. Anyone want to be 'responsible' for the attack? (First come, first served)

Are you not even surprised TIOR gave you a porno as a present?

Are you not even surprised TIOR gave you a porno as a present?

Well, I appreciate the generosity! Thanks!

OOC:Just make those terrorist guys that we where killing before be responsible, and have someone back them.

OOC:Just make those terrorist guys that we where killing before be responsible, and have someone back them.

Good idea! Thanks. Okay, so who's responsible for backing up the Red Dragons?

(sigh) Who wants to attend this thread's funeral? (crickets chirp) Er, never mind...WAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! (just kidding!)

Can it be a puppet?

Can it be a puppet?

Can what be a puppet? The Red Dragons? (If so, yes)

Sasha Cheenin whipped out her cell phone and turned it on. "Stink, stink, stink!" she exclaimed. "I'm out of the service area."

Grenval will back RB. Which reminds me, RB check your TGs there is an important war you must see. The link is in the TG.

Thanks, Grenval.

Official Statment-
The government of Doomingsland sends its condolences and pledges its support to our ally, Roach-Busters.

OOC:Someone be bad guy already, I want to blow stuff up.

Official Statment-
The government of Doomingsland sends its condolences and pledges its support to our ally, Roach-Busters.

OOC:Someone be bad guy already, I want to blow stuff up.

Me too!

Official Statment-
The government of Doomingsland sends its condolences and pledges its support to our ally, Roach-Busters.

OOC:Someone be bad guy already, I want to blow stuff up.

OOC: ha ha ha. Crazy kids.

Back in the castle Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor asked his Chief of Staff, "Did we get that bastard President King?"

"We don't know yet sir" Replied General Slugmuffin, "We do know we scored a direct hit on the Cathedral though. We just don't have confirmation of who was killed yet."

"That S.O.B.'s ancestors took away our land and freedom, its about time some one made that country pay. We need our land back, NOW!" As soon as they figure out it was us who struck they'll start some sort of attack for retaliation. I want EVERYONE who can carry a gun, drive a tank, etc. on full alert. We've got 10 Missiles with Chemical Warheads left, I want all them targeted at Roach-Busters. The minute they try something, Launch 2 and report back to me. Now go, make ready for our glorious retaking of the fatherland from the infidel pigs."

With that, Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor, swung on his heels and entered his private chambers. Pulling the curtains he cursed silently, rolled up his sleeve and got the syringe prepared.

OOC: Here ya' go, bad guys with a motive, your country "stole" their land 100's of years ago. The new drug addicited, psychotic self-styled Ruler for Life has decided to reclaim the fatherland and restore his country's greatness.

Major Lian Nash opened the hatch of her Mark III and looked at the carnage. "Well," she laughed, "it's a good thing we were late." The four Mark I's trailing her had their hatches open too, their occupants wondering at why their infrared was going off the chart.

Back in the castle Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor asked his Chief of Staff, "Did we get that bastard President King?"

"We don't know yet sir" Replied General Slugmuffin, "We do know we scored a direct hit on the Cathedral though. We just don't have confirmation of who was killed yet."

"That S.O.B.'s ancestors took away our land and freedom, its about time some one made that country pay. We need our land back, NOW!" As soon as they figure out it was us who struck they'll start some sort of attack for retaliation. I want EVERYONE who can carry a gun, drive a tank, etc. on full alert. We've got 10 Missiles with Chemical Warheads left, I want all them targeted at Roach-Busters. The minute they try something, Launch 2 and report back to me. Now go, make ready for our glorious retaking of the fatherland from the infidel pigs."

With that, Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor, swung on his heels and entered his private chambers. Pulling the curtains he cursed silently, rolled up his sleeve and got the syringe prepared.

OOC: Here ya' go, bad guys with a motive, your country "stole" their land 100's of years ago. The new drug addicited, psychotic self-styled Ruler for Life has decided to reclaim the fatherland and restore his country's greatness.

Thanks for volunteering to be the bad guy!...too bad we have to obliterate you from the face of the planet now.

OOC: someone give me an IC reason to do something! i have a new military and nothing to use it on!

OOC:Hooray! Now I can use the weapons I've been developing!


IC:After tracing where the missiles where launched from, the military was placed on high alert and prepped for an invasion.

10 Longsword bombers took off from Doom AFB, each one loaded with 8 LSLRM missiles. The bombers accelerated to mach 3 and reached near orbit altitude. At aproximatley 900 miles away from their targets, the Longswords unleashed their weapons. The LSLRM missile has a top speed of mach 4.7, making it extemely difficult to intercept. 10 missiles targeted the capital building, 20 headed to the largest airfield in the country, another 20 headed toward a tank depot, and another 10 targetted any ships they can find.

I developed the LSLRM missile a long time ago, and I don't know how to find the thread, and the Longswords where givin to me by an ally who designed them.

OOC:Hooray! Now I can use the weapons I've been developing!


IC:After tracing where the missiles where launched from, the military was placed on high alert and prepped for an invasion.

10 Longsword bombers took off from Doom AFB, each one loaded with 8 LSLRM missiles. The bombers accelerated to mach 3 and reached near orbit altitude. At aproximatley 900 miles away from their targets, the Longswords unleashed their weapons. The LSLRM missile has a top speed of mach 4.7, making it extemely difficult to intercept. 10 missiles targeted the capital building, 20 headed to the largest airfield in the country, another 20 headed toward a tank depot, and another 10 targetted any ships they can find.

I developed the LSLRM missile a long time ago, and I don't know how to find the thread, and the Longswords where givin to me by an ally who designed them.

"INCOMING!" Yelled Robert. "10 Bogeys. Damn, Mach 4.5 plus. Activate the Capitol's EMP (Electro-Magnetic Pulse) devices. Warn the Ruler!" The EMP's did their job. All 10 of the missiles headed to the Capitol Castle lost computer guidance and went wild. 3 collided with each other. 1 hit close enough to the castle to cause some damage to it, but only 1 person was killed. The rest detonated in midair raining debris over everything, but doing no more damage than breaking some windows and blowing the roof off an outbuilding.

At the airstrip, they were on full alert. 25 planes in the air circling the city and 25 more ready for take off on a moment's notice "Here it comes" said air traffic control Bobson. "Launch now!" The Mig 90's began take off, one every 2 minutes or so off all 4 runways "Crap, thought Captain Roger Ranger. "What good is it to take off? We can't shoot down the incoming missiles and if the field is destroyed, where do we land? This is madness, pure and simple. The field's laser missile defenses better do their job!" They did, sorta. 5 missiles actually struck their targets. 3 landing strips were destroyed. The tower damaged to the point that only emergency power kept it operating at 40% capacity. 80 people died

Tank battalion commandant, Colonel Panser, didn't get the warning. One minute all was well, the next the entire base exploded. His last thought was "shit!" 30 tanks were turned to slag heaps and over 300 people turned to ash in just minutes.

10 missiles hit the sea. Not a single ship was hit due their built in EMP devices. Sadly, however, the water concussion blew out the hull on the submarine Rover and the 2 battleships Slug and Slimey collided in the confusion and sank. Over 750 lives were lost in the biggest naval catastrophie of Schitheads' existence

OOC: check out my country's stat's. I'm REAL small and new (though not a newbie to the game, only my country is new). I gotta save the capitol because of the uprising to come. I mean, come on, why on earth would a country of less than 10 million attack like this unless the leader was a psycho? But, it seemed like a cool thing to do, be the bad guy. :)

The Salieri Family has funded the Farbini-Fear Group in the past and has been proven of this, so if the possition is nto yet taken, we can RP them funding thier attacks, becouse the are the secound most wealthy family in the Cammarchist Nation.

(Commarchy is a different government, if you want information on how families play into the government, I will provide the URL)

Somewhat dusty Markgravine of Both was fumming stuck apparently in what she in her nicer moment called "Mr. Orkin Land". The odd blue dress swayed with her athletic body. "Damn it I want answers...even if they didn't take a pot shot at me it violates all forms of decorum. Have we gotten a response back from their State Department or whatever on who did this little piss poor act of agression?"

[OOC - Because I will be going on vacation...]

Grenval cannot deploy troops itself at this time, however, we will wire 50 billion guymns and give RB access to the follow:

2nd Heavy Division: 20,000 Infantry, 1,000 M120 Mortars, 50 M109A6 Paladin Howitzers, all mounted in M113A1 Armored Personal Carrier.

4th Heavy Division: 20,000 Infantry, 1,000 M120 Mortars, 50 M109A6 Paladin Howitzers, all mounted in M113A1 Armored Personal Carrier.

17th Heavy Division: 20,000 Infantry, 1,000 M120 Mortars, 50 M109A6 Paladin Howitzers, all mounted in M113A1 Armored Personal Carrier.

21st Heavy Division: 20,000 Infantry, 1,000 M120 Mortars, 50 M109A6 Paladin Howitzers, all mounted in M113A1 Armored Personal Carrier.

32nd Heavy Division: 20,000 Infantry, 1,000 M120 Mortars, 50 M109A6 Paladin Howitzers, all mounted in M113A1 Armored Personal Carrier.

To: Roach-Busters
From: Grenval

Grenval wires 50 billion guynms and the above 100,000 Heavy Infantry.

The Salieri Family has funded the Farbini-Fear Group in the past and has been proven of this, so if the possition is nto yet taken, we can RP them funding thier attacks, becouse the are the secound most wealthy family in the Cammarchist Nation.

(Commarchy is a different government, if you want information on how families play into the government, I will provide the URL)

OCC: lets make this cool, assist me. my country is small, but supposedly fighting for a just cause, the return of our land.

Roach-Busters: Feel free to let me know when I overstep my bounds and Godmodd on ya'. Oh, yeah, BTW, any problems with my country sharing at least a small border with you? It'll make some of my stuff better if we border each other. A border guard battle could be cool.

Grenval also sends to Roach-Busters disposal:

2nd Naval Armament: 1 CVX Class Carriers; 5 SSN-774 Virginia NSSN Attack Submarines; 2 SSGN-726 Trident Ohio Class Submarines; 5 CG-21 Class Cruisers; 10 DD-21 Class Destroyers
Carrier Contains: 40 F-22 Raptors, 40 Av-8B Harrier IIs; ASW

Please attempt to return as many men, ships, artillery, etc. as possible.

The Emperor of the United Empire of Colerica, Maderic Thra, was standing in his throne room, staring out of his large windows when he was informed of the sabotage. Maderic's icy blue eyes stared right through the messenger that told him of the tragic event.

"Kressi -- is she dead?" Maderic asked.

"According to the Roach_Busters government, sir, no she's not. They have said that all foreign visitors made it out of there alive," the messenger said.

"Leave me," Thra said. "But wire the Roach_Busters government. Ask them if there is anything we can do for help. Now get out of here," the Emperor snapped.

"Yes sir," the messenger said, quickly exiting the throne room.

Within a few minutes, the phone rang. Maderic reluctantly answered, waiving away one of his pesky servants.

"What is it?" he said slowly.

"You haven't learned to say 'hello,' yet?" the voice on the line said. Maderic instantly recognized it as his younger sister, Kressi's. Relief flooded him, if only for a second.

"I'm glad to hear your voice. The CIIA is telling me that it was a missile. Are you injured?" Maderic asked.

"Not bad, my Emperor. I have only a few cuts and bruises. I was one of the lucky ones. The Roach_Busters government confirms that it was a missile. Are you planning anything, in terms of help?" she asked.

"I'm considering it. The Secessionist Crisis has deepened in your absence, dear sister. My aides tell me that Belser may secede soon," the Emperor informed her.

"We'll prevent that from happening, Maderic," she stated.

"I would hope so for your sake, Kressi. You're a great asset. I'd hate to lose you," Maderic replied.

"You won't being losing me anytime soon, big brother. I'm on my way back to the United Empire as we speak," she said. "I'll talk to you when I see you face-to-face in the palace. Goodbye."

Maderic said nothing. He simply hung-up the phone. He was not one for petty greetings or farewells. Such things slowed down people. They could make people emotional. Maderic was never one to be considered emotional.


To: The Government of Roach_Busters; President J.L.
From: The United Empire of Colerica
Subject: Potential assistance.

To whom it may concern,

Following the recent sabotage of your wedding and the near-death of our Magistrate of State (and the Emperor's younger sister), Kressi Thra, we have become ablidged to help you. While we doubt we can offer any true military assistance, as we are in the midst of a national crisis, we can offer you the services of some of our highly-trained Advanced Recon Commandos and the intelligence assistance of the Colerica Imperial Intelligence Agency as well as financial loans. Consider it.

Regards,

Kircer Danton
Magistrate of Foreign Affairs

*After the attack on the wedding*

"Mr. Prime Minister! Are you okay?" said his personal bodyguard in the ruins of the church.
- "I've been Prime Minister for less than a week, I'm not going down from one terrorist attack. I've been in central intelligence for 25 years, I should have expected something like this" the battered Prime Minister Ian McKinney said as he rushed out of the church. "Is my chopper ready?"
"Yes sir, its landed about a block from here" the bodyguard said while removing his MP-5K from his suit-jacket.
- "We gotta hit the bastards who did this. Find out who it was" The PM said while boarding his personal Ka-60 Kasatka helicopter.
"We're already on it" the bodyguard yelled over the sound of the massive rotor. The helicopter took off from the intersection near the church and headed out to the Octovonian battle cruiser OSS Subduer, a kirov-class cruiser. The massive ship and its naval entourage of 5 Sovremenny class destroyers and 2 Saschen air-defense frigates raised anchor and departed for the naval port of Sarkograd, the most heavily-defended city in Octovonia and then will make their way to the capitol of Octovon City.
---------

Official Release from the Supreme War Council of Octovonia:

In this latest incident of global terrorism, the government of Schitheads has been found responsible for the missile attack on the presidential wedding in RB. The PM of Octovonia, Ian McKinney, has ordered all military forces on highest alert and has called up the reserves as we prepare military action against the Schitheads. The navy is forming up a wartime strike fleet to take action against Schitheads. Octovonian Su-37 Terminator fighter aircraft are making regular defensive patrols to stop any airborne intruder from making their way into Octovonian airspace. International civilian flights have been cancelled in the name of security. Our industries have begun wartime production and our prototype YF-23 fighters are beginning preliminary production, we are hoping the can receive some combat testing in this conflict. The people of Octovonia must not fear attacks, we are a proud and strong country, our air-defense batteries of S-400 Triumfs are on full alert to take anything out of the skies. Our navy is in full defensive deployment and the Army is regularly patrolling the streets. Fear not defeat...

Victory or Death!!!

Mt.Doom Facility, Doomingsland

"Was the attack a success?"
"The enemy armor was annihilated, three airstrips where put out of commision, but there was only minor damage to the castle."
"Well, at least we sent them a message." said General Helldawg, President of Doomingsland.
"Yes, sir, they now know we know who did it."
"Prepare an expidionary force for Roach-Busters, we'll use them as an entrance into Schitheads."
"Yes sir!"

The 3rd Marines and 1st Armor boarded vessels and aircraft headed for RB, the force totaling nearly 300,000 men and 8000 vehicles in total. 300 F/A22s and 100 F35s where sent to an airbase in RB.The embassy in RB, already the most heavily defended Doomingsland embassy due to terrorist attacks that resulted in a massacre of the terrorists, was further reinforced with Partiot missile batteries.

Message to RB-
Request permission to send forces to assist in the defence of your country and retaliation against Schitheads.

OOC:How do you type in code?

ooc: [cod*e]Your message here[/cod*e] Remove the asterisk[sp?]
---------------


To: Roach Busters

Please pick up your tanks. They are currently parked before the ruins of the destroyed church

Sincerely,
Major Lian Nash

BTW: if you need our help, just ask. I'm on leave along with the rest of my company, so we can get deployed in a day or two

Maureen scowled as she heard the news. "Every time Temme tries to get invovled with Roach-Busters, there's a terrorist attack."

Sasha had finally managed the use of a phone. "Now, Ms. June, it's not their fault. I'll be here a little while longer until it's safe to return home."

"I'd feel safer if we got you a helicopter straight home."

"It's okay, Ms. June."

OOC: I'll get some more stuff up tonite, I'm a little busy at the present time with "honey-do's"

OOC:Now I can test the new orbital weapons platform that I just finished! You can find the thread on the new forums since I just finished development.

Mt.Doom, Doomingsland-
"Activate ODIUIS."
"Yes sir, I'll give the order immediatly."

"ODIUS, this is STRATCOM, you have orders to fire on a target."
"Fire order confirmed, opening silo doors."

Atop Mt. Doom, massive silo doors opened revealing a shaft that went deep into the mountain.

"You have permission to fire."
"Affirmative, sir."

Two operators within the facility turned seperate keys and punched in a code, arming the weapon. The weapon was then fired.

A massive beam of energy was seen emerging from Mt. Doom, everyone had seen it happen during test firing of the weapon. The beam cut through the atmosphere, and was deflected off a mirror satelite, which uses a magnetic field to redirect the beam. The beam then traveled to another satelite which sent it down to Earth.
The beam fired for 26 seconds.

The target of the weapon was one of Schithead's carriers. It was targetted so the beam would split the carrier in half. It would have no trouble cutting through the deck...

OOC:The weapon isn't goddmodding, since the satelites can be shot down, and the beam is no where near as powerful as a nuclear weapon, its basicly mean for presicion strikes on high value strategic targets, so civilian casualties would be unlikely.

Message to Schitheads-
We demand your immediate and unconditional surrender.

In the First Presidential Palace deep in the heart of Ruthless Slaughter, President R.C. sat in his board room listening to some hippies propose a Save the Trees act. He was just about to flip the switch that would send them to the torture room when his Chief Advisor comes bursting through the door:

CA: Sir! The wedding's been attacked!

R.C.: Mm? Oh, the one you said I had to miss for a press conference. What did you hit a button in the Command Wing or something?

CA: This isn't the time for jokes sir! We believe it may have been the Red Dragons!

R.C.: Ah, them! They tried to set up a cell here but they never got past the border. Ready a Black Hawk and 2 C-130s. The usual F-16 escort. I want our Black Ops mobilized. I shall visit the palace personally...

CA: Uh, sir? This is all well and good but it will take an hour or so to get there. Their country is kinda out of the way.

R.C.: Damn! *sigh* Very well. TG ahead, notify them that we're coming.

CA: As you wish sir.
They set off to the country, but will not arrive for some time.

An hour later the Black Hawk has landed on the roof of Roach Buster's palace and the RS Black Ops division has set up a defensive perimiter while F-16s can be heard patroling the skies.

Back in RS at ODIUS Ground Control:
Officer on Duty (OOD): Project ODIUS has just been fired!

Ground Control Chief (GCC): What?!?! I wish Doomingsland had warned us! Did anything happen?

OOD: No sir, all went normally if you count a beam of energy shooting out of a mountain normal. The initial attack on the cathedral was confirmed as a missle. Should we have intercepter missles readied in case they try again?

GCC: Not my call... Do it anyway. I'm sure the president won't mind an extra precaution.

NOTE: I will not be able to participate, because technically I don't have a military (my list of all weapons, vehicles, etc. was in an old post before the forums got taken down), but if our old posts are ever restored, I'll definitely jump in. In the meantime, though, thanks to all nations who have intervened on my behalf. I swear I'll make it up to you some day.

They are restored. Here's a link to all posts you've ever made on NS:

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/search.php?searchid=15916&pp=15&page=34

They are restored. Here's a link to all posts you've ever made on NS:

http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/search.php?searchid=15916&pp=15&page=34

How can I ever thank you?

It didn't work!!!! All I got was a message that said, "Sorry - no matches. Please try some different terms."

Just left-click on your nation name, on the left side, next to your last post, and choose 'Find more posts by Roach Busters' from the menu that appears.

Just left-click on your nation name, on the left side, next to your last post, and choose 'Find more posts by Roach Busters' from the menu that appears.

Thanks! Will it even let you view posts from the old forums?

Yes. -Everything- got carried over.

Yes. -Everything- got carried over.

But it only showed posts 1-500! And I posted more than 500 things!

Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor, fully loaded with methamphetamines, sat behind his desk in the castle and gave the go code on the war phone. Instanlty 10 ICBM with intelligent eye guidance systems and EMP generators to protect against "shoot down" efforts began their launch sequence. In less than 5 minutes, all 10 would be speeding their chemical death warheads towards 5 civilian targets in Doomingland and 5 in Roach busters. Meanwhile, at sea, the remaining ships in the Schitheads navy had launched 30 cruise missles aimed at military targets in Roachbusters and another 15 aimed for Doomingsland's main military installations. In the air over Schitheads, a huge dogfight between 45 Schitheads Mig-90's and Doomingsland planes was underway. However, 2 battleships, a sub and now and aircraft carrier lay at the bottom of the ocean. The Migs would have a difficult time landing since the main airfield only had one landing strip left and Dick T. Atoor was clearly losing his mind

General Homiphuba pondered long and hard. He was not a traitor, but the Glorious Leader must be mad to have started this war. Sure, the official press had told the people they had been attacked in an unprovoked fasion by Roachbusters and their allies, but he knew better than that. The ruler had to be removed and this madness stopped before his entire country was destroyed. "Give me the reigns of government" he thought, "we can be a great nation. Leave them with Dick and we'll all die." with that he began typing.

Leaders of Roach Busters and Doomingsland:

Our glorious ruler has gone quite mad, but much of our military is devoted to him. They don't understand the situation fully though. I'd ask for help in the form of ground forces and/or covert ops to end this senseless war over a stupid and imangined 400 year old land dispute. I wish to remove our ruler from power and assume the reigns of control, but need assistance. Destroying us does nothing. Allow us to have a level of sanity in our government and you'll see what a great nation we truly are. Don't judge us by the acts of a madman. I await your reply

Respectfully,
General Homiphuba
Schitheads Army Joint Chief of Staff

The General hit the send key and the encrypted communicaque was on its way. Now he had to wait.

at the border between Roachbusters and Schitheads, the 15,000 assembled Schitheads with their 50 tanks (about the only remaining operative tanks in the country) under the command of General Eatimall Allive, began their advance into Roachbusters. "Something had to give soon, this was getting out of control" thought the General. He had his orders and had been ready for this. Clearly though, the Glorious leader had not be prepared for the swift and decisive retaliation by Roachbuster's allies.

OOC: I leave it to ya'll to decide how effective my attacks are, but surely some thing has to get through and do some serious damage somewhere. AS you can see though, I am prepared to lose the war and install a new government, one not headed up by a drug addicted looney.

But it only showed posts 1-500! And I posted more than 500 things!

It only shows threads, and obviously you'll have posted more than one thing on one thread a couple of times.

OOC:RB's having a civil war in a different thread.

Mt. Doom-

"Sir, we've recieved a message from a Schitheads general, apparently they're staging a coup."
"Good, tell him to stay out of the presidential castle, but to make sure the dictator stays."
"Right away, sir."

"Take out the castle."
"Fire order confirmed, opening silo doors."

The men went through the usual procedures fo firing ODIUS, this time the target was the castle.
"Commence firing."

The beam was fired at the castle.

"Mr. President! We have multiple ICBMs coming out of Schitheads!"
"The bastard. Order everyone into the shelters. Its most likely a chemical attack."

At the military bases, Patriot missile batteries intercepted the cruise missiles with ease. The massive speaker towers in the civilian areas warned of the attack, and everyone donned their gassmasks and proceded underground.

The casualties where sbstansualy low thanks to the well organized evac.


RB border-

General Doom watched through his binoculars as the enemy armor and infantry assembled on the border.
"Leave no one alive to tell the tale of the carnage about to occur today."
"Yes, my general."

500 Crusader artileries opened up on the infantry with cluster munitions, each one capable of maiming everything in an area the size of a football field. 30,000 soldiers and Marines waited in their predug positions, and opened up on what ever was left alive. The tanks where enegaged by 2000 M1A2 Abrams and 2000 M2A3 Bradleys. The enemy was hoplesly out numbered and out gunned.

Over the sea-
"Bandits, 11 0'clock. Move in to engage."
200 F/A22 Raptors sped in at mach 1.8 to engage the enemy. At 20 miles, they loosed 4 AMRAAM missiles each. Most of the pilots had seen extensive air combat during the Vladimir Wars, and knew how to take on the MiGs. They closed with the surviving MiGs and engaged with sidewinders.

Having intercepted the comunications betweenthe factions in this war the high council of Shenyang has decided that it is time that we joined the party. We are sending in Omega, our Elite Spec Ops unit. 500 commandos are currently en route to the battle lines, with another 1000 in reserve. The Shenyang Airforce has been mobilized and we are sending in our Sileria 2 squadron with bunker buster bombs to attack the rouge faction's capital.

"We are inbound to the target area, eta 5 minutes. Commence radio silence on my mark, mark."

Shenyang air control reports that all 80 bunker busters away, fighters are on their way home.

The Proccian "Cobra]776" armored force, consisting of 355,000 troops, 1,075 tanks and 900 attack helicopters are ready for deployment to Roach-Busters. Procco is giving command of these to R-B. We have trust the you will use them well.


>//end transmission

Now in the RB palace, President R.L. quickly goes to console his fellow national leader:
R.L.: Damn it J.L.! I'm so sorry about what happened. You have the condolences of all of Ruthless Slaughter. We promise that we will send all forces available as soon as I get the call they are ready not many casualties I hope.

"WHAAAAAAAAT!!!!" Screamed Ruler for Life, Dick T. Atoor. "The Doomsingsland bastards have attacked in support of Roachbusters?!! We've lost a carrier, sub and 2 battleships? Our airforce is in trouble? What in the Hell were you thinking commander when you launched this attack?"

"Umm, sorry Sir, but you ordered the att......."

"You dare to question me!?"

"Uhh, no sir. I just need to know what to tell the pilots of the 18 remaining Migs. Our pilots have done well, shot down over 40 Doomingslad planes, but they have only 2 places to land now. Are they to be Kamikazies in this madness?"

"Hell yes. They fight or they die!! Go now! lead our airforce to victory!! General Homiphuba, I hope your news is better than that of that jerk ass airforce minister!"

"Yes s-s-sir" stuttered the general. Our ICBM's hit all their targets. casualties in Doomingsland were minor, less than 2,000 total by our estimate due to their established evac. protocols. chemical poisoning of their water supply might add another 2,000 over time depending on their water treatment process. Long term effect should increase the cancer rate by about 1-2% over the next 30 years in Doomingsland. However, Roach-Busters is engaged in civil war now. No one there did anything to stop the missiles. We await official confirmation, but estimate almost 25,000 civilian casualties with similar long term effects to follow.

Unfortunately, the cruise missile strikes were without any appriciable affect in either country. Worse, our only remaining armored battalion struck through the border at Roach Busters, but has been stalemated by their forces. 10 of their 40 tanks have been destroyed and the battle lines are drawn and stagnant. Oh, one more thing sir, we found your son, Dick T. Atoor, II his mother had him hidden at a great aunt's house in the country of Mauiwowee. We've returned him and it is his time to lead!!"
With that, General Homuphuba drew his service Glock S&W .40 caliber, semi-auto pistol and let fly 3 rounds, directly into the Ruler's head. "What the f--" said Dick T. Atoor, but that was all.


Rulers of Roach-Busters and Doomingsland:
Dick T. Ator is dead. Our forces have been recalled. His 15 year old son is to be installed as the nominal head of government. PLEASE hold off further attacks for 72 hours while we ready ourselves and make the world announcement regarding the regime change.

OOC: I want to keep my castle so I ignore and refuse to accept the attack on it. Your objective is retained without the need to destroy our capital building. I want to hear a Roach-Busters reply to this thread. I took responsiblilty and demolished my nation, only to be taken out by an "ally" I appreciate the war, but I want to hear the "good guys" reply. I don't mean to be an Ass, but until Roach-Busters gives me a detailed response to this thread, I"m going to ignore everything else posted after this. Ya'll win, but I can't accept total annihalation from an "ally."

OOC: Oh yeah, no offense, but I don't accept that you had over 30,000 of your own troops on the border to "protect" RB and/or that they were ready to repel a pre-planned invasion by my guys. I don't have any problem admitting RB was better prepared than we expected and even that you assisted in the preparation. I don't accept annihilation, I do accept stalemate and being bogged down.

OOC:I posted deploying those men before near the begining of the thread, so what's the problem. RB is ignoring this thread, I think, so its pretty much over. That stuff you posted about shooting 40 planes down is just bs that he's telling the dictator to save his ass, right?

OOC:I posted deploying those men before near the begining of the thread, so what's the problem. RB is ignoring this thread, I think, so its pretty much over. That stuff you posted about shooting 40 planes down is just bs that he's telling the dictator to save his ass, right?

OCC: Oh, OK I see where you posted the deployment. No sweat. Yeah, sorry I didn't think the godmodding part through when I said we shot down 40 planes of yours. (Note that I did acknowledge the loss of a butt load of mine though). So sure, He's covering is ass about the number of planes we lost by telling the Glorious Ruler that we did better than you. Let me know how many we shot down. The new Government will shortly offer to make reparations to the countries that lost men, equipment, etc. due to the work of our now dead, mad leader.

IC:
AP News: The world has learned today that the border war between Roach Busters and Schitheads has ended with Schitheads withdrawing its forces after the sudden and unexpected death of their Ruler, Dick T. Atoor. His 12 year old son, Dick T. Atoor, Jr. has been installed as the new nominal leader for life under the guardianship of Advisor, General Homuphuba. In the new government's first official act, General Homuphuba officially apologized to Roach Busters, Doomingsland and others for the actions of their former ruler that led to the war: "We want to officically apologize for the tragedy inflicted on undeserving innocents due to the actions of our Ruler. In his last days, he was exceptionally ill and in the throws of serious mental disease. We wish to discuss terms of reparations to the countries involved in this conflict for damage to their property and military equipment and will offer to compensate the families of the vicitms of our attacks with the sum of 2.5 Million USD per family. We'd ask the governments involved to provide us with certified lists and documentation on the dead whose families wish to make claim for the compensation package. and well as provide information of their planes and other property damaged in the war which they feel we should pay for under our offer to make reparations. Please do not hold against all Schitheads what was done under the direction of a madman. Our soldiers were merely following orders. Those orders have now been rescinded and the author of those orders is dead."

Seeing as the bloodshed is at an end, RS recalls all deployed back home for a well-deserved rest.

All forces are being sent home. We accept your reparations, and will send you details.
OOC:I calculated that with the amount of stealth aircraft I sent at you, you wouldn't know what hit you and your planes would be wiped out without being able to fire a shot. Lets just say 34 soldiers where killed and 567 civilians where killed.(that's my guys)

To: J. L.

Once again, please pick up your tanks. They are currently parked before the ruins of the destroyed church where you were supposed to have gotten married.

Sincerely,
Major Lian Nash

"Got it?" Lian asked, sitting atop the turret of her Mark III MBT.

"Yes, ser," Sergeant Lumis grinned, displaying a large, greasy paper bag of fast food.

"Good job, sergeant," the major nodded.

"Something smells good," Captain Germis commented, getting out of the Mark I MBT that he was guarding, one of the four that were supposed to have been gifts for the president of Roach-Busters.

All forces are being sent home. We accept your reparations, and will send you details.
OOC:I calculated that with the amount of stealth aircraft I sent at you, you wouldn't know what hit you and your planes would be wiped out without being able to fire a shot. Lets just say 34 soldiers where killed and 567 civilians where killed.(that's my guys)

OOC: I can live with it :)