NationStates Jolt Archive

We have to admit it: Yaksylvania is broke. A foreign blockade has caused a stop to our exports of minerals and lumber, which makes it impossible for people to buy food, making people starve. Reports indicate that a foreign ship carrying food was sunk by Galdanian ships patroling the coast of our nation.

We appeal for the nations of the world to send monetary aid! Our people are starving, all because of the Galdanian blockade! Please, send rice, grain, canned foods, milk, clean water, and other essentials.

Money is the best thing to send, as the government can spend it on the citizens best. Also, send news teams to see how bad things are. See what the Galdanian blockade is doing!

Children cannot go to school, because they spend their days scrounging through the garbage for food! Babies are dying because of dirty water after the government lost the ability to clean it! Even those that can afford clean water cannot get it, because there is none! Stores are bare, because there is no food coming in! Farmers are being killed for their food by angry pesants, starving to death!

Over 5,000 people have died from famine or disease because of the blockade! Stop the Alliance of Evil now! Blow up the ships of death! Bring peace to Yaksylvania!

Galdania? Umm.. is that large? How close are those ships anyhow. Have you tried building coastal turrets that OUTRANGE all ships from gunboats to battleships? I know we do. There's nothing like shelling some overconfident battleships kilometres before they are able to fire at you. I mean, who says that big guns are for ships only? The ground is a more stable platform to shoot, too. So, the guns, with loooong barrels, are deadly accurate. The trick is to fire at them with artillery first and grab their attention. When they start launching cruise missiles and the likes, the diesel submarines swarm them. Why diesel? Diesel-electric submarines are cheap and very very quiet. Not fast though, so you need them lurking everywhere. We can't afford that so we estimate we would have like 1 submarine ambushing the enemy fleet or something. Our defense is a bit lacking and our army STILL uses bolt-action rifles based on the Mauser 98 design. But who cares about low impulse modern assault rifles when you can have a cheap, one-shot-one-kill weapon that looks cools and has a superb range compared to these plastic urban warfare systems.

I'm willing to send a prototype methanol-electric submarine, 3 sailing yachts and 2 sailing ships. The ships both have a 90mm cannon as the main gun (ooh..). Both ships and yachts have 20mm gun and of course, some infantry with Mausers. We'll load each of these vessels with salty licorice candy and rye bread! You can have them for free! It tastes good! Don't worry about Galdanians. I'll have one of our best nuclear submarines following my ships. (dual reactor, 16 pipe with fast reload, 40 knots below water, hull is reinforced with titanium and stuff...) If anything goes wrong the umm.. 'Enforcer' will take care of them and if anything goes wrong again it will run away and all I'll lose is some crappy ships and a prototype. No scientists will participate this audacious journey. You'll have ryebread and salty licorice candy in no time! :D

OOC: Oops

Minister of Foreign Diplomacy Terry Harris has prepared a formal response:

"People of Yaksylvania. We have heard your cries for help. We have seen the horrid conditions that have plagued you due to this unnecessary blockade. Buechoria is sending as follows:

- 500,000 mutli-size/type shirts
- 500,000 multi-size/type pants
- 1,420,000 cans varied cans of food
- 900,000 gallons of clean water

The people have seen your plight, and are doing their best to resolve. Buchorians are donating everything they think the Yaksylvanians can use. Good luck!"

http://www.ppcc.cccoes.edu/OurCampuses/AboutUs/images/Terry.Harris.jpg
Minister of Foreign Diplomacy Terry Harris

Nominaen will send food supplies, via air.

Galdania has not sunken any ships while near the Yaksylvanian coast, civilian or otherwise. These lies by Yaksylvania's government will not be tolerated.

We will begin dropping food supplies within the hour.

Our ships have not turned away any vessels, civilian or otherwise. We will allow ships through the blockade, so long as they are unarmed and carry only humanitarian supplies. All ships will be thoroughly searched, and may be scuttled if there is reasonable suspicion that they are carrying weapons or other contraband.

When truly free, democratic elections are held, we will pull out.

Galdania is willing to send in a Civilian Worker Team of 1,050 volunteers to rebuild Yaksylvania's 'crumbling cities'.

OOC: Check your telegrams, Yaksylvania. We can make a deal.

Galdania has not sunken any ships while near the Yaksylvanian coast, civilian or otherwise. These lies by Yaksylvania's government will not be tolerated.

We will begin dropping food supplies within the hour.

Our ships have not turned away any vessels, civilian or otherwise. We will allow ships through the blockade, so long as they are unarmed and carry only humanitarian supplies. All ships will be thoroughly searched, and may be scuttled if there is reasonable suspicion that they are carrying weapons or other contraband.

When truly free, democratic elections are held, we will pull out.

Galdania is willing to send in a Civilian Worker Team of 1,050 volunteers to rebuild Yaksylvania's 'crumbling cities'.

OOC: Check your telegrams, Yaksylvania. We can make a deal.

Galdania has not sunken any ships while near the Yaksylvanian coast, civilian or otherwise. These lies by Yaksylvania's government will not be tolerated.

We will begin dropping food supplies within the hour.

Our ships have not turned away any vessels, civilian or otherwise. We will allow ships through the blockade, so long as they are unarmed and carry only humanitarian supplies. All ships will be thoroughly searched, and may be scuttled if there is reasonable suspicion that they are carrying weapons or other contraband.

When truly free, democratic elections are held, we will pull out.

Galdania is willing to send in a Civilian Worker Team of 1,050 volunteers to rebuild Yaksylvania's 'crumbling cities'.

OOC: Check your telegrams, Yaksylvania. We can make a deal.

His Majestys Government opposes in the strongest terms the current state of hostilities between the Governments of Yanksylvania and Galdania.
His Majestys Government offers the good offices of the Foreign Secretary of The Kingdom of Altenburg to mediate an end to this dispute.

yr obt svt
Lord Herbert
Foreign Secretary

His Majestys Government opposes in the strongest terms the current state of hostilities between the Governments of Yanksylvania and Galdania.
His Majestys Government offers the good offices of the Foreign Secretary of The Kingdom of Altenburg to mediate an end to this dispute.

yr obt svt
Lord Herbert
Foreign Secretary

The dispute is between the Yaksylvanian dictatorship and the Yaksylvanian people. Killing pro-democracy protestors and striking workers is not acceptable.

Ixnus Minimus
Deputy Administrative Assistant
Department for the Export of Social Outcasts

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:

Your urgent plea for help has traveled far and even penetrated the legislative halls of Prolixia. Countless Sub-Sub-Subcommittes have been established to deal with your plight.

The lawmakers of Prolixia have come to a consensus.

Prolixia will provide 500,000 of our destitute, flea-ridden poor to provide for your national defense (and leech off your generous social programs).

Airlift operations have already begun: You cannot decline our offer.

Also, Prolixia issues an ultimatum to the insignificant nation of Yaksylvania:

We require 1/3 of your yearly production of high quality gin.

Failure to concede to our demands will result in another onslaught of social parasites with forged Yaksylvania citizenship papers.

Your economy could not/would not survive.

PROLIXIA HAS SPOKEN

Ixnus Minimus
Deputy Administrative Assistant
Department for the Export of Social Outcasts

If you are interested the Generic empire can provide you with a certain assurance of victory. We have several drums of nerve gas left over from our war that we would be more than willing to let you...borrow. If you have aircraft then the gas can simply be deployed over the ships and will kill all sailors aboard. If you need aircraft we will provide those also. We too oppose the tyranny of Galdania and long to see it crumble before those it oppresses. Get back to us as soon as possible with a reply to our most generous offer.
-Friedrich Zorin, Director of Generian Intelligence

Ixnus Minimus
Deputy Administrative Assistant
Department for the Export of Social Outcasts

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:

Your urgent plea for help has traveled far and even penetrated the legislative halls of Prolixia. Countless Sub-Sub-Subcommittes have been established to deal with your plight.

The lawmakers of Prolixia have come to a consensus.

Prolixia will provide 500,000 of our destitute, flea-ridden poor to provide for your national defense (and leech off your generous social programs).

Airlift operations have already begun: You cannot decline our offer.

Also, Prolixia issues an ultimatum to the insignificant nation of Yaksylvania:

We require 1/3 of your yearly production of high quality gin.

Failure to concede to our demands will result in another onslaught of social parasites with forged Yaksylvania citizenship papers.

Your economy could not/would not survive.

PROLIXIA HAS SPOKEN

Ixnus Minimus
Deputy Administrative Assistant
Department for the Export of Social Outcasts

Um, I really think this should be IGNORED. This is a serious RP, not some "I sENdZ U aLll OFf mY P00rZ0rZ!!!!1111!11!1!!1"

If you are interested the Generic empire can provide you with a certain assurance of victory. We have several drums of nerve gas left over from our war that we would be more than willing to let you...borrow. If you have aircraft then the gas can simply be deployed over the ships and will kill all sailors aboard. If you need aircraft we will provide those also. We too oppose the tyranny of Galdania and long to see it crumble before those it oppresses. Get back to us as soon as possible with a reply to our most generous offer.
-Friedrich Zorin, Director of Galdanian Intelligence

SEMI IC/OOC: Any nations supplying weapons to Yaksylvania will be repremanded. The use of chemicals will result in military action (which has not yet taken place).

We are pleased by Galdania sending supplies to the people of Yaksylvania,along with other nations, and all the while maintaning the blockade. Halibris shall send 300,000 cans of preserved food and 10,000 gallons of fresh water via ship.

If you are interested the Generic empire can provide you with a certain assurance of victory. We have several drums of nerve gas left over from our war that we would be more than willing to let you...borrow. If you have aircraft then the gas can simply be deployed over the ships and will kill all sailors aboard. If you need aircraft we will provide those also. We too oppose the tyranny of Galdania and long to see it crumble before those it oppresses. Get back to us as soon as possible with a reply to our most generous offer.
-Friedrich Zorin, Director of Galdanian Intelligence

Secretly to Generic empire: We will take these greatfully. THank you.

IC: We greatfully accept the aid being supplied by all nations. HOwever, we must rebuild our infrastructure. For that donations of money would be best. Donate to the Yaksylvanian Infrastructure Comitee.

Um, I really think this should be IGNORED. This is a serious RP, not some "I sENdZ U aLll OFf mY P00rZ0rZ!!!!1111!11!1!!1"

Ixismus Prolixus
Legislator General
Head auditor of the Destitute Head-Count Committee
Prolixia City - Tent City # 51

Galdanian Envoy

Your taunt underestimates the number of beggars, hobos, and street bums present in the Great Memescape of Prolixia.

As a nation with absolutely no standing army or any supplies of military equipment, we make do with what we have. That being: Copious numbers of the destitute.

Let it be known, however, that our army of poor will bring supplies to the embattled peoples of Yaksylvania. Rags, fleas, and all three flavours of hepatitis will be distributed generously to the citizens of Yaksylvania.

Your desire to ignore the impending social disaster in Yaksylvania reveals how large the blinders are over your eyes.

PROLIXIA HAS SPOKEN

Um, I really think this should be IGNORED. This is a serious RP, not some "I sENdZ U aLll OFf mY P00rZ0rZ!!!!1111!11!1!!1"

Ixismus Prolixus
Legislator General
Head auditor of the Destitute Head-Count Committee
Prolixia City - Tent City # 51

Galdanian Envoy

Your taunt underestimates the number of beggars, hobos, and street bums present in the Great Memescape of Prolixia.

As a nation with absolutely no standing army or any supplies of military equipment, we make do with what we have. That being: Copious numbers of the destitute.

Let it be known, however, that our army of poor will bring supplies to the embattled peoples of Yaksylvania. Rags, fleas, and all three flavours of hepatitis will be distributed generously to the citizens of Yaksylvania.

Your desire to ignore the impending social disaster in Yaksylvania reveals how large the blinders are over your eyes.

PROLIXIA HAS SPOKEN

I agree with Galdania. Stop spamming. Get out.

Secret to Yaksylvania: We will deliver these drums discreetly over land. Look for several small Isuzu trucks with covered cargo areas. They will arrive in 2 days and with 20 minute increments between each arrival. Use these wisely and end the tyranny of out enemies for all those that they oppress. Long live Yaksylvania!

TO THE GOVERNMENT OF GALDANIA:

To insure the safety of nearby civilian and military vessels in the vecinity of the blockade, we will be sending a PT boat with fully equipped diving team and cruiser with UN/Buechorian officals to inspect your ships for recent use of weapons, etc. The diver team will search the area for traces of any attacked, sunken ships.

http://www.electriclaunch.com/images/PT%20Boat%20T.jpg
The inspection PT boat and cruiser