Lunatic Retard Robots
18-04-2004, 04:12
Hello, this is Judy Swallow of NSBC world news, your source for world news as it happens. Now, for our 11 o'clock newscast, we take you to the city of New Kharkovski in southern Lunatic Retard Robots. What's the situation, Roger?
The cameraman zooms to a man dressed in standard reporter warzone gear, a pair of khaki pants, a blue shirt, and a blue flak vest.
"Well, Judy, according to the regional magistrate Kevin Edwards, a nationalist movement known as NAPF, or North Asian Popular Front, has instegated a major military operation against the provincial authorities and local military units. According to Mister Edwards, the rebels have made significant progress from their base in the southern end of the province."
"What has the provincial government done to combat the rebellion?"
"So far, what has been described as a 'large armored contingent' has been rallied on the southern side of the Klegg mountains, the chain of mountains that seperates the cold, rainy northern portion of the country from the relatively arid and warm south. Several divisions of tanks, mostly the second-line MBT-4 'Red Cloud' tanks, and 'John Henry' wheeled personnel carriers have gathered around New Kharkovski, and they are awaiting a rebel attack."
Overhead, a flight of Jaguars can be heard.
"Does this geographical seperation have any military significance?"
"Yes, Judy, in fact the rebels are counting on this to give them a chance against the local forces, who, in terms of numbers, are evenly matched with the rebels."
Roger holds up a map
"See, Judy, here are the Klegg mountains here. Very few roads pass through the mountains, and only one road tunnel passes through the Kleggs. The airforce is almost solely concentrated in the northern part of the country, and less than fifty jet aircraft gaurd the southern province. The rebels are counting on the government's inability to get any number of troops from their positions on the mainland to the province to give them a fighting chance against the government troops."
The camera pans to the right, and zooms in on an MBT-4 in a field.
http://www.haaland.info/leopard1/world/leopard1v.jpg
The song "Dela" by Savuka can be heard in the background, as the tank's loader appears to sing it.
Then, from down the road, a BOV-M APC comes screaming out at high speed, followed by a column of other vehicles.
The camera suddenly is aimed at the ground as the cameraman and the reporter run for cover.
"Rebel column, 2 o'clock! Light armor and soft targets!"
"Red squadron this is red two, we have hostiles 2 o'clock."
The loader shoves a 120mm round into the breech of the cannon, and the turret follows the BOV-3 along the road. Suddenly, it swerves off the road, apparently having seen the tank.
"Fire!"
The BOV explodes, flinging wreckage all over. The chatter of automatic gunfire can he heard, and the cameraman gets up, showing the commander of the MBT-4 firing the tank's 7.62mm MG towards the burning vehicle.
10 other MBT-4s converge on the area, and soon the column is littered across the road, charred and burning wreckage.
The rebel leader, General John Dumont, stands up at the podium in front of tens of television cameras.
"Today, we formally declare war on the nation of Lunatic Retard Robots for their neglegent handling of our great nation. Lax policies on immigrants have allowed undesirables to spoil our country, so called progressive policies have made a mockery of our faith, the government allies itself with jews and half-clad savages (direct references to Western Asia and Aztec National League), totally ignoring the history of our nation. We cannot allow the government to weaken our nation to death, and so, I call on all citizens of this country to take up arms against this government and build a future safe for good citizens. We also call on other nations who respect their heritage to help us defeat this foe, for the sake of god and civilization."
In the north of LRR, above the mountain chain (which runs from the baltic coast to the black sea coast), the people who happen to be watching public access get a good laugh out of the guy. The few people who come out of their house singing patriotic anthems and with a double barreled shotgun are most often met by Wiesel tanks and reserve infantry companies who convince them to return home. LRRN, LRRA, and LRRAF squadrons are put on alert, but a casual alert, since it is not believed that anyone will actually respond to the call for help.
In the south, most people get the same feeling, especially since the only people home are the approximately 40 percent of the province's 30 million people who have not joined the rebels.
From the rebel base, large groups of armored vehicles issue forth and head towards the provincial capital, by now defended by several tank divisions and motor rifle divisions. TOW missiles can be seen on top of the outlying buildings in the city, and Land Rovers make patrols into the countryside, looking for rebel columns to attack. (The landscape of southern LRR is like southern africa).
The rebel columns meet only light opposition as they start out. General Dumont calls a halt to the advance, to wait for help from other nations.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/bov-1.jpg
A rebel BOV at a roadblock.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/brdm2-4.jpg
Rebel troops advancing into a town held by a government tank platoon, which was later driven out.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/m80-1.jpg
A rebel BMP-1 crossing a highway.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/vbl3.jpg
A government VBL on patrol.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/t87-3.jpg
One of the LRRA's 10 type-87 armored cars in action against a rebel column.
OCC: You can join in as a mercenary, secret aid to the rebels or whatever. Just join!
The cameraman zooms to a man dressed in standard reporter warzone gear, a pair of khaki pants, a blue shirt, and a blue flak vest.
"Well, Judy, according to the regional magistrate Kevin Edwards, a nationalist movement known as NAPF, or North Asian Popular Front, has instegated a major military operation against the provincial authorities and local military units. According to Mister Edwards, the rebels have made significant progress from their base in the southern end of the province."
"What has the provincial government done to combat the rebellion?"
"So far, what has been described as a 'large armored contingent' has been rallied on the southern side of the Klegg mountains, the chain of mountains that seperates the cold, rainy northern portion of the country from the relatively arid and warm south. Several divisions of tanks, mostly the second-line MBT-4 'Red Cloud' tanks, and 'John Henry' wheeled personnel carriers have gathered around New Kharkovski, and they are awaiting a rebel attack."
Overhead, a flight of Jaguars can be heard.
"Does this geographical seperation have any military significance?"
"Yes, Judy, in fact the rebels are counting on this to give them a chance against the local forces, who, in terms of numbers, are evenly matched with the rebels."
Roger holds up a map
"See, Judy, here are the Klegg mountains here. Very few roads pass through the mountains, and only one road tunnel passes through the Kleggs. The airforce is almost solely concentrated in the northern part of the country, and less than fifty jet aircraft gaurd the southern province. The rebels are counting on the government's inability to get any number of troops from their positions on the mainland to the province to give them a fighting chance against the government troops."
The camera pans to the right, and zooms in on an MBT-4 in a field.
http://www.haaland.info/leopard1/world/leopard1v.jpg
The song "Dela" by Savuka can be heard in the background, as the tank's loader appears to sing it.
Then, from down the road, a BOV-M APC comes screaming out at high speed, followed by a column of other vehicles.
The camera suddenly is aimed at the ground as the cameraman and the reporter run for cover.
"Rebel column, 2 o'clock! Light armor and soft targets!"
"Red squadron this is red two, we have hostiles 2 o'clock."
The loader shoves a 120mm round into the breech of the cannon, and the turret follows the BOV-3 along the road. Suddenly, it swerves off the road, apparently having seen the tank.
"Fire!"
The BOV explodes, flinging wreckage all over. The chatter of automatic gunfire can he heard, and the cameraman gets up, showing the commander of the MBT-4 firing the tank's 7.62mm MG towards the burning vehicle.
10 other MBT-4s converge on the area, and soon the column is littered across the road, charred and burning wreckage.
The rebel leader, General John Dumont, stands up at the podium in front of tens of television cameras.
"Today, we formally declare war on the nation of Lunatic Retard Robots for their neglegent handling of our great nation. Lax policies on immigrants have allowed undesirables to spoil our country, so called progressive policies have made a mockery of our faith, the government allies itself with jews and half-clad savages (direct references to Western Asia and Aztec National League), totally ignoring the history of our nation. We cannot allow the government to weaken our nation to death, and so, I call on all citizens of this country to take up arms against this government and build a future safe for good citizens. We also call on other nations who respect their heritage to help us defeat this foe, for the sake of god and civilization."
In the north of LRR, above the mountain chain (which runs from the baltic coast to the black sea coast), the people who happen to be watching public access get a good laugh out of the guy. The few people who come out of their house singing patriotic anthems and with a double barreled shotgun are most often met by Wiesel tanks and reserve infantry companies who convince them to return home. LRRN, LRRA, and LRRAF squadrons are put on alert, but a casual alert, since it is not believed that anyone will actually respond to the call for help.
In the south, most people get the same feeling, especially since the only people home are the approximately 40 percent of the province's 30 million people who have not joined the rebels.
From the rebel base, large groups of armored vehicles issue forth and head towards the provincial capital, by now defended by several tank divisions and motor rifle divisions. TOW missiles can be seen on top of the outlying buildings in the city, and Land Rovers make patrols into the countryside, looking for rebel columns to attack. (The landscape of southern LRR is like southern africa).
The rebel columns meet only light opposition as they start out. General Dumont calls a halt to the advance, to wait for help from other nations.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/bov-1.jpg
A rebel BOV at a roadblock.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/brdm2-4.jpg
Rebel troops advancing into a town held by a government tank platoon, which was later driven out.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/m80-1.jpg
A rebel BMP-1 crossing a highway.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/vbl3.jpg
A government VBL on patrol.
http://naoruzanje.paracin.co.yu/t87-3.jpg
One of the LRRA's 10 type-87 armored cars in action against a rebel column.
OCC: You can join in as a mercenary, secret aid to the rebels or whatever. Just join!