NationStates Jolt Archive

-FSNNN WIRE REPORT-

Yarmov Shipyards

After nearly 35 years of building it and using almost the entire country's steel and natural resources to construct it, the FSN has finally released the first and only ship of the Dean Kelm-class super battleship, the FSN Dean Kelm. The ship took 34 years to construct, costed the FSN trillions and trillions of dollars, and costed the FSN the lives of 1450 personnel who died while constructing this massive ship. The FSN also forced a large part of its population to work on the ship. The nation of Bosnia-Herzegovina also funded part of the ship's construction

One Admiral released the following about its purpose: "The Dean Kelm was meant for one purpose, and one purpose only... To rape the living hell out of any ship smaller than it..."

The ship inspires pure awe due to its nearly 5 kilometres in length and its five hulls, nearly a kilometre wide. Another noticeable feature, is its massive guns, and the sheer number of them.

Rough specifications are being released at this time, more specifications and another picture will be released in due time....



-Rough Specifications-

The ship can last at sea for 36 years without needing to refuel the reactors, ship carries 12 months of disposable stores

Power provided by- 16 nuclear reactors (four are back-up power) powering four main shafts and 50 bubble-jet movable thrusters.

Crew- 56,000 (6200 officers)
4000 Marines
Can hold up to 60,000 more personnel


Vehicle complement- 24 landing craft
24 Helix ASW
44 transport helicopters
4 STOL airborne radar aircraft
2 STOL airborne sonar/ASW aircraft


Length- 4.75 kilometres
Width- 1.05 kilometres


Speed- Top speed (all reactors at maximum)- 29 knots, cruise- 14 knots


Weaponry- Most weapons to be released later

SA Klinok-II ADAM system (260 missiles; range: 15 km, rate of fire: 1 missile per 3 sec)

110 AK-630 gattling AA
(6x30 mm; 6'000 rds/m/mount)


SA-77 Kaptikov SAM system (44 launchers with 8 missiles per launcher)

5 forward facing torpedo/depth charge tubes, 3 rear facing

460 12.7mm anti-air/anti-personnel machine guns




http://img21.photobucket.com/albums/v63/Chlevenkov/Dean_Kelm-class_Super_Battleship.gif

*sniggers* 4... 4KM??? BWA HA HA HA!! Oh.. OH! I knew Doujins new Mega ship inspierd some people, but I didn't think like this.. .Oh dear me... Um, FSN, you have created an island... Doujins mega ship was 'Barely' on the grounds of believable.. this.. well this doesn't just cross the grounds.. it blows them to kingdom come.. if this was a 'SPACE'Ship you would have far better luck my friend

This ship is believable...just excessively impractical. Very nice picture by the way.

Well....Doujin's ship pushed everything to the limit in terms of material strength, construction, weapon size...but this...this is....

:shock:

If I may here, according to his 'Size chat' some of his guns are over a Km
in length, can anyone here think of what a Km long gun would weigh?
anyone anyone? Can anyone tell me what it would take to mount it on a
turret? -ahems-

Aside from all that, it IS a nice picture... really, move it from 4.5km to
maybe 4000ft and you'll be a little more safe... (of course even that is
massivly oversized)

And, is it just me, or does this thing have 'FIVE" Hulls?

... Idiocy?

Was that the word you were looking for? Because that's what I'm thinking.

Well....Doujin's ship pushed everything to the limit in terms of material strength, construction, weapon size...but this...this is....

:shock:

Now you see why I didn't want to get into super-dreadnought wars? :P

As an aside - that flag will be the size of four football pitches.

Of course here the differance is that, With Doujin, we all grumbled about it
buit in the end we gave him an 'OK' for his ship, I personally don't mind just
one of those thighs around, but here... Here we are ALL in agreement that
this completly and totaly crosses the line...

I mean, where could you build this thing? At 400 m in draft this thing would ground itself in the middle of an ocean. You wouldnt be able to build it anywhere near a coast line

Meh, I don't care. As a post modern nation, my Mako firing a 1kt nuclear device out of a spinally mounted railgun can deal with most anything you people can put out.

I dont think that a ship that size is structurally possible. A turret one KM long would not be able to exist.and not all the guns would be able to fire, take a look at the front of the ship those three small turrets would be blown to smithereens if the lowest huge turret fired.

For god sakes the flag alone is one kilometre long.

Well, the Doujin lived at the end of practicality, the very largest a ship could go in terms of steel and titanium construction, and it was very impractical at the size it was, this thing though. He said he used steel in his construction, ...but steel simply isnt that strong. If the Doujin fired a full broadside the hull would curmple, if this thing fired a broadside...well....34 years down the toilet.

So its as impossible as it sounded? For a few seconds I was worried that a new arms race into ridicioulesness had been started. :D

Well, yes, basically. The Doujin took may hours trawling through my uni maritime textbooks and consultation with maritime engineering proffesors and other checks and notes and calculations on steel and othe rmaterial strength. It literally sat on an edge of technological construction possibility, one that couldnt be breached unless you were in the vacuum of space or using superhard materials. Then there's this, roughly...a hundred times larger?

Yes it's impossible. But even if it could be achieved, it's far from unsinkable... (At least for me)

What we have here is a case of serious envy, with a dash of idiocy thrown in.

The out-Doujining of the Doujin has begun!

it may very well work, only one probelm a single smart bomb aimed at themagazine will blow it into the sky. Not to mention tatical nukes

[quote="Former Soviet Nations"]-FSNNN WIRE REPORT-



One Admiral released the following about its purpose: "The Dean Kelm was meant for one purpose, and one purpose only... To rape the living hell out of any ship smaller than it..."



Interesting... such a large ship, an extremely large price tag, but just for one small purpose? A ship as large as the one described is widely impractical, and far from invincible. Such a large ship would not only need an entire airforce, but an entire armada of ships, just to defend it. A small fleet of seawolf class attack subs could eliminate this battleship, as long as they attacked from the sides. Or maybe a formation of high-level long range bombers with stealth capabilities, I'm sure that a B-2 flying under the cover of night while carrying a nuclear warhead would have no problem identifying such a large target. Furthermore the guns that it is armed with, what are they 1km long!!!!???? Thats insane, for two reasons. The first being that this ship, in all of its glory weighs too much. It would not be able to get close enough to shore to use its guns on land targets, without beaching itself. The second reason is that cannons of a large measure, like the ones described or like the ones you see on WW1 and WW2 battleships, are obsolete. We are fighting wars of missles and bombers today, rarely is there such thing as a naval battle, especially one on the scale that would require such weaponry. The economic and military advisors of the Militaristic States of Europe, hence the Protectorate of Northern Germania advise that this ship be melted down(however long that may take), and either sold, or remolded to construct better, more conventional weapons of war.

DAMN! that thing is bigger than some of my space cruisers :(

And as people have pointed uot, it isn't just impractical.. it's impossible. It would cost trillions to build, the draft would be 400m (or 1,332 ft draft).. any probelms there? It's just a floating platform, it would take longer than 35 years to build because it would be in the middle of the ocean, and it DEFINATLY could not move that fast, not even at top out speeds. I know people want to make something bigger and better than the DN Doujin, but we basically pushed every limit with her. You could get bigger, yes, but bigger means slower, and heavier, and from experience now I know how to sink super battleships like this one, and my own. *sigh* Good try, FSN.

Oh, and you couldn't afford it.

Former Soviet Nations Gross Domestic Product

Population: 1,415,210,760
Civil Rights: Some
Economy: Fragile
GDP per Capita: $1,520
GDP: $2,151,120,355,200
National Budget: $222,331,367,829

Percentage of GDP Spent on Defense: 1.55%
Percentage of Budget Spent on Defense: 15%
Military Budget: $33,349,705,174

And as people have pointed uot, it isn't just impractical.. it's impossible. It would cost trillions to build, the draft would be 400m (or 1,332 ft draft).. any probelms there? It's just a floating platform, it would take longer than 35 years to build because it would be in the middle of the ocean, and it DEFINATLY could not move that fast, not even at top out speeds. I know people want to make something bigger and better than the DN Doujin, but we basically pushed every limit with her. You could get bigger, yes, but bigger means slower, and heavier, and from experience now I know how to sink super battleships like this one, and my own. *sigh* Good try, FSN.

Oh, and you couldn't afford it.

Former Soviet Nations Gross Domestic Product

Population: 1,415,210,760
Civil Rights: Some
Economy: Fragile
GDP per Capita: $1,520
GDP: $2,151,120,355,200
National Budget: $222,331,367,829

Percentage of GDP Spent on Defense: 1.55%
Percentage of Budget Spent on Defense: 15%
Military Budget: $33,349,705,174

the flag is bigger than most of your space cruisers for god sakes

match the Doujin (which would be hard enough), but this is just penis envy in the worst way. FSN, let the naval engineers do what they are good at and you stick to what you're good at (which apparently isn't designing ships.)]

LMFAO!

Naw, I'm just fuckin' with ya all... I'm just doing a bit of a spoof on Doujin's super-ship...

Anyways, yes, it is a nice picture (that I created) and I may have to use it for an actual battleship I was thinking of making...


Yes, the flag is huge... I think it came out to be one sq. km.


A technical note on the Dean Kelm, it cannot turn...

Some more interesting notes on the Dean Kelm:

The Dean Kelm was actually named for a child molester... This is in good reason to the Dean Kelm as well, since the Dean Kelm is rather large, like the real Dean Kelm, and likes to 'molest' smaller (all) ships.

Top speed was actually confused with a smaller vessel, the top speed of the Dean Kelm comes out to an impressive 5 knots in perfect conditions, although weather doesn't play any role in how the Dean Kelm operates.

The main guns can effectively fire an Iowa-class battleship for ammunition, as long as the main mast and control tower are cut off.

In order to fire the main guns, 560 kilotons of explosives are required.

The Dean Kelm was actually created as an ambitious dooms-day weapon, being able to haul upwards of 100,000 civilians and wreak havoc by means of launching some 600 well-aimed ICBMs at the polar ice cap, in order to break up the ice, and melt a large amount to, causing massive floods. After this, the Dean Kelm would float at sea until its food and supplies ran out, then the civilians would begin fishing for food or eating each other. Then, after its nuclear fuel was wasted, massive sails would be erected to move the ship across the ocean's surface at a relative speed of about 0.000218 knot. But, before it ran out of food or fuel, it would proceed (in a straight line of course, as it cannot turn) and destroy every surviving land-mass with its onboard complement of Iowa-class battleships including Mt. Everest. If any survivors are found (such as other naval ships), they will be promptly destroyed and turned into reefs... It is estimated, the FSN population aboard the Dean Kelm could go on for some 600 years before most are rendered incapacitated due to extreme mental retardation and other defects caused by years upon years of inbreeding (this takes into account the expected 20,000 civilians to be eaten and the 40,000 that will commit suicide).

[That's a good joke, if a little late for April Fools. Nice job on the picture, by the way. Did you use a tablet or mouse?]

67.5 747s long! :shock:

747s…that should be a term of measurement…

Lol.... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Imagine the wieght of that thing if it were real!

I think the oceans would rise a bit from just one of these things. And according to your scale, thats one hell of a flag!

*Would like to point out that Soviet Bloc actually made the picture*

Yes, Soviet Bloc ( a friend of mine and member of my region) made the pic for me. I didn't exactly tell him what it was for, but I should thank him, because it is a good pic. Anyways, I think Soviet Bloc used regular paint with a mouse. Not sure though, you'd have to ask him.


Mmhmm, it is a helluva flag... Very, very large... It had mutliple purposes:
1. To provide shade for the crew
2. To alert enemies of the ship (as its visible from nearly 60 or so miles away)
3. To draw enemy ships within firing range so we can rip them up with our Iowa class battleship-firing cannons.
and 4. To scare the living hell out of small countries when we approach with a flag that's larger than their country... We'll then promptly disconnect it, attach it to a few helicopters and drop it on the country.