NationStates Jolt Archive

News Anchor:

In a swift act of the Renikovian Special Forces, the illegal muffin market operating in renikovs capital city of Ravel was shut down. 13 grannies were injured but none were killed, and all were arrested including the ringleader who was caught trying to stuff the muffins in her handbag while escaping.

Renikovian special forces leader: It was a racket that had to be shut down. Those grannies had it coming

Reporter: Now the kids breakfast all over the region will be saved....they will be able to consume non-counterfit muffins again.


In this picture we see the Renikovian Special Forces raiding the grannies illigal front for the muffin market.
http://www.themoscowtimes.com/photos/photo-essay/2002-10-28/pic7.jpg

Reporter again: But this is not the only Illegal Muffin Racket in the region. This is only the beginning of the fight against such rackets. And we need all nations help to crush this growing problem.

This is Adam popalopudes reporting for renikov nightly news.

Ooc:
NOOOO! Not the muffins! Not the muffins! (Lmao)

Renikov Nightly News anchor adjusts his tie and begins:

In related news: All the seized muffins from tonights raid have gone mysteriously missing on the way back to the evidence warehouse in Ravel. It is a major hit for the War Against Muffins in the region.

In other news: A large breakfast banquet has been planned at the Renikovian Palace, the main food on the menu: Gourmet Muffins. All the local Nation leaders and high profile celebritys have been invited to the party.

http://www.iownjoo.com/freeimghost/Jereko/BNNNN.jpg

Anchor Man: "Welcome to Beriskov National Nightly Network News, i'm your anchor man Phil McKrac"

Anchor Woman: "And i'm your anchor woman Amanda Hugncis, our top story tonight the Beriskovian Muffin Racket, what went wrong?. After the recent shutdown of a branch of the Renikovian Muffin Racket there was a raid on a building suspected to be harbouring many Muffin racket workers...."
http://www.iownjoo.com/freeimghost/Jereko/SWAT.JPG
Anchor woman: "....the opperation seemed to be going to plan and they had the first floor of the building under control, as soon as the SWAT team advanced to the second floor they were attacked by the Granny workers, this small resistance was fought off without trouble, but what the team wasn't expecting awaited them on the roof, GRANNY NINJAS...."
http://www.iownjoo.com/freeimghost/Jereko/NinjaGranny.JPG
Anchor Woman: "....the entire team was taken by surprised and killed with extreme swiftness and without alerting and oncoming forces. The operation was aborted until further arangements could be made"

Anchor Man: "Onto further news, two men were arrested on drug charges as police found that they weren't carrying any, they were released on bail soon after...."

RNN Report:

Anchor 1: "...and sadly, they were all fangoriously devoured by a gelatinous monster."

Anchor 2: "Speaking of being chewed up and digested, we all love muffins, don't we? Well, turns out Communist Renikov has had a few counterfeit muffin-making grannies in their midst. Several of them were arrested today as the fake-muffin market came to a sudden crash."

Anchor 1: "Fake muffins, eh, anchor 1? Hmm, that sounds like those piece-of-crap muffins I bought from the cafe today."

:P