NationStates Jolt Archive

Memo from Empress Carolyn:

On behalf of Emperor Ed and myself, I would like to thank Manarth, MadderMike, and Dubelco for responding to our RSVP. Henceland Omega and Mirabar have also telegrammed me personally. Emperor Corran brought up the good point of how many delegates are to be invited. I must limit the number of attendees to six from each country. Not because we do not have the funding for this (heaven forbid) but because the security will be so tight at the wedding. I do not wish for any "incidents" to happen on my wedding day. I've been waiting for this my entire life, ever since I was a little girl watching the Klingon wedding on that one episode of Deep Space Nine, and while it might be exciting, I really do not want to die. If a country asks for special permission, Emperor Ed may be able to grant it. More information on security procedures will be forthcoming in the days before the wedding. Thank you, and I look forward to seeing you all at the wedding next Tuesday.

Regards,
Empress Carolyn

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping and Em Goodbody find themselves in a bar around the corner from the hotel Prime Minister Mike Oldsmobile will be staying. Normally he would stay in the MadderMikian Embassy but the Embassador to Edenstein from MadderMike was appointed by Mike Frod when he was Prime Minister. For some reason he blames Mike Oldsmobile for Mike Frod's untimely death by a rougue UFO.
Em "Did you see the fax of the Empress' memo?"
Mike "Yeah, only 6 representatives, the Prime Minister usually takes that many lackeys with him to the head."
Just then a nattily dressed man comes up to Mike and says "Your wife is looking particularly radient tonight."
Mike jumps up, his face beet red and body tensed for a fight, he says to the man "She has nothing to do with nuclear weapons and she is not my wife ...yet."
Em quickly steps between the two men calming Mike's well meaning but misdirected rage.
The man rapidly steps back and leaves the bar.
Em"Mike you are so sweet to defend my honor but he was just complementing me. Do you think he noticed my pistols?
Mike"I'm sure he did. Quite sure."

*In the Edenstein National Cathedral Thorm Filicia, designer hired by Emperor Ed and Carolyn is supervising and directing hanging of decorations*

Thorm: NO NO NO!!! YOUR DOING IT ALL WRONG!! THAT BANNER NEEDS TO GO TO THE LEFT!!! THE LEFT! MY LEFT NOT YOURS!!!

Worker: Yeah boss..

Thorm: You mindless peons!!! Think like I do so I don't have to yell...

*Ted Allen, the person in charge of the reception afterwards comes in and pats Thorm on the rear*

Ted: Hows it going cowboy?

Thorm: Better now that you are here.... *watches as worker drops a bust of Empress Carolyn and it smashes on the floor* DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT THING COST???? THE EMPEROR PAID GOOD MONEY FOR THAT! ALL OF YOU!!! OUT OF MY SIGHT!!!! NOW!! COME BACK IN AN HOUR!!! I NEED TIME TO MEDITATE!!!!

*the workers drop what they are doing and leave*

Ted: It will be ok...

Thorm: But I have less then a week to put this together!

Ted: It will be fine I promise...

Thorm: Not with imbicles who don't know the difference between Mauve and Salmon!

::In the United Republics of Manarth, Zev Killian is getting ready::

Zev: Now Mr. Blackford, I know you can't stand Madder Mikeians, so just stay away from them all.

Stanley Blackford: I just don't like their holyer than though attitudes, that's all.

Zev: I don't care. You just have to deal with it. I'm not letting you stay behind just because you have a problem with other cultures. You're the Foreign Affairs Minister for Prophet's sake!

Blackford: Yes, that is true, but...

Zev: No more buts. I've booked the Hotel, and we're headed there now. I need a bit of a vacation, all these crises are starting to wear me out.

Blackford: And Izaskis meets us there?

Zev: He's headed there as we speak. He'll probubly arrive before we do.

Blackford: Well, what are we waiting for? To the airport!

Zev: Okay then. Let's be off.

*tag*

**Inside the office of Shoudra Stargleam**

Shoudra: Now Pwent, you know you are going to have to try and behave yourself right?

Pwent[a strong looking man with firey eyes and an attitude to match]: You have me word that I won't be causing trouble. But a bath?!

Shoudra: Yes Pwent, a bath. There are times even the Gutbusters need to bathe, and this is one that you cannot pass.

Pwent[driving a fist through the wall]: Bah! All ye do is keep me all prettied up, I'm a killer not a lover!

Shoudra: True, but now you are a representative of Mirabar. You have to give good face, and under no circumstances are you to bring your Gutbuster concoction of yours. God knows how the people will be able to handle it.

Pwent[throws up his arms and storms out of the room]: Bah!

Shoudra[quietly to herself]: This is going to be interesting. Well I had better get working on our outfits.

OOC: Just for those that did not catch it in the main forum.

Mike of Mike and Mike shipping (MMMS), Em Goodbody and newly arrived Lance Corporal Mike “The Bomber” Kazinski (LCMK) are preparing to go to dinner in the rotating restaurant on the 18th floor of the Edenstein Hilton.
MMMS “We still haven’t heard about the use of concealed weapons.”
Em “I feel naked with only 2 HK 9mm and a .25 revolver with a hammer shroud.”
MMMS “How about you cousin Kazinski?”
LCMK “I have only 3 remote controlled bomblets, of course the heels of my shoes are explosive and I think my belt buckle is too. How about you?”
MMMS “I only have my .445 Dan Wesson and 2 Ruger 9mm.”
Em “I hope we don’t run into any of those sanctimonious Maranthians and their “In your face” attitude.”
LCMK “Yeah, my dad says he still misses all the fingers on his left hand because of that bombing incident.”
MMMS “Bombing kinda runs in your family doesn’t it?”

::Gen. Isaskis is waiting at the entrence to the Edenstein Hilton, hoping that his Prime Mininster would finally arrive so that he could go inside and drink himself into a stupor::

Isaskis: I hate these d*** formal affairs. I hate my f***ing military dress. I hate this new s*** of a PM. Why do I have to f***ing come?

::Soon, a car with Manarthian flags, devoid of any security pulls up::

Isaskis: Stupid f*** doesn't even worry about terrorists. At least Jarnicki kept some people around her, not that it did her much good. I still wonder who's responsible for that. Oh well, he's here now, no worrying about that for a while.

::Zev Killian and Stanley Blackford exit the car, a Autoingen LX-W Coupe, and Killian flips the keys to a waiting attendent::

Killian: Scratch it all you want. It's a rental. Good to see you Isaskis.

Isaskis: And how good it is to see you Mr. Prime Minister. I've already taken care of the rooms, you'll have one of the two penthouses.

Blackford: Who else is staying here?

Isaskis: So far it looks like the Madder Mike delegation. I don't know who else.

Blackford: Aw hell.

Killian: You'll behave yourself, or you'll answer to me. Come on now, let's get these bags inside.

Blackford: Screw that. Get a bellhop. I need a drink.

::Blackford walks off towards the Bar, while Killian and Isaskis try to get the suitcases upstairs to the penthouse::

ARGHHHH slow server. wrong sign in.

The three MadderMikians stop down at the main entrance of the Edenstein Hilton. Just then a very large, noticeably armored limo arrives. Stepping out of the limo is MadderMike's Prime Minister Mike Oldsmobile, Mike Bond, and a chief lackey. The chief lackey begins directing the bellhops in gathering up 8 huge trunks. Em Goodbody tells the PM they have reserved one of the two penthouse suites for him. The head bellhop asks what is in these crates.
Mike Bond "Bees, the Prime Minister has a skin condition and requires the application of bee stings every two hours."
PM "I have a lot of paper work to catch up on why don?t the four of you go get dinner, I'll have my lackey fix me something."
The four head up to the restaurant stopping in the bar first.
Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping "Oh damn look at that, there's one of those Manarthian diplomats. Watch this."
He takes Em?s cell and punches in his own number. Quickly adjusting his phone to the loudest ring, the phone starts playing an obnoxious version of La Cucaracha. After letting it play for 3 cycles he picks it up and in one of those loud "I'm more important than you voices" he holds a fake conversation discussing the relative merits of using pig brains for some concoction called head cheese.
OOC i'm going to have to give him a last name to keep everybody straight.

OOC: CoC would like to send

Lieutenant General MacDuff and wife
Former Premier Robert Connery and wife
Minister of State Reginald Bartlett

Blackford: F***ing Madder Mikeians. Hey Mike! Yeah you, Mike! Shut you're prophet d***ed cell off or I'll shut your f***ing face!

Upon hearing the ranting from Blackford, Mike shouts back "HEY CAN'T A GUY HAVE A CONVERSATION WITHOUT SOME REDFACED, BEETLEBROWED, DROOLING, IMBICILE STICKING HIS POCKMARKED NOSE INTO MY BUSINESS!!!
Kazinski moves silently around to the side of Blackford and slips one of his mini bombs into Blackfords sportcoat pocket. Kazinski thinks to himself explain that to your new prime minister.
Em Goodbody slips her hand into Mike's pants and grabs his hard cold iron....................the .445 Dan Wesson.
OOC: What were you thinking. :twisted:

::While Corran finishes up some business at home and Luna, Ruri, and Hoover are at a meeting of Daistallians, Ritsuko travels to the Hilton. Upon arrival, she walks into the middle of a heated argument between several people. Her eyes grow wide as she watches a lady reach down a man's pants and pull out a gun::

Ritsuko: Uh... What's going on here?

::The mini-bomb explodes suddenly, causing Blackthorn to fly back. Fortunately too small to do any serious damage, he still has a cracked rib and a nasty gash on his forhead after bashing into the bar during his fall. He gets to his feet::

Blackthorn: *gasp* F***ing *gasp* p***y. *gasp* *gasp* Can't *gasp* fight *gasp* with your *gasp* fists?

::He drops to one knee as the room swims around him. As he fades into unconsiousness, he can see Killian running towards him::

Killian: Blackthorn you moron, why the prophetless void did I appoint you anyway?

Everyone calm down! This fight is over now! Some one get him a doctor! Oh and Blackthorn...

Blackthorn: ::opens one eye:: *gasp* yes? *gasp*

Killian: You're fired.

The MadderMike delegation quickly scurries out of the restaurant, Mike pulling up his pants and Em trying to hide the hand cannon. Mike Bond is chiding Kazinski about he bomb. Kazinski says "It was defused I was going to point it out when he was in front of his Prime Minister, get him in a lot of trouble. He must have activated it himself."
Mike Bond "Just as well Mike probably would have broken his hand again."

They let themselves into the Penthouse suite and find Mike Oldsmobile and the chief lackey in an animated conversation while assembling a pair of stinger missiles.
Chief Lackey "I talked to all of the assistant lackeys over at our Embassy and they all said the same thing. The Ambassador drives by the hotel every morning at 6 AM. driving the biggest limo in Edenstein. I have arranged for them to be in the street at that time tomorrow. The Ambassador's head lackey will be with him. He thinks he is a sub-chief lackey but he is no better than a butt-kisser. He can't even sweat on cue..."
The chief lackey drones on and on about the qualities of the Ambassador's lackey...

OOC: Ok here are the security protocals, I'll just post them as a Gaurd telling them to the security out front of the cathedral for your own reference. OHH Btw funny as heck so far everyone... :-D

Ic: *Lt. Kieven walks up to the gate of the church where about 20 gaurds with flack jackats, camo, 2 way radio headset berets, grenades, flash grendaes combat boots, and little linux penguin patches on their arms gather. They are carrying AK-105's and Beretta 9mm side arms*

Lt. Kieven: Ok grunts listen up, you have been chosen because you are some of the finest men.. *Gets stern look from a blond female soldier standing off to the right* and women in the Edenstein arm forces. We are going to have some of the highest dignitaries in LETI, LOTI, and the world at this wedding, not to mention our own Emperor Ed... I'm going to outline the security protocals... the diplomats have already been briefed on it.

*The soldiers take out a piece of paper with instructions on it*

Lt. Kieven: Now, the cars will pull up and let out the occupants, here *points at gate* and then they will go through the first stage of security. All delegates will be debriefed and profiled for name, class, rank, country (of course) and other such details. Weapons will be confiscated and returned to delegates after the ceremony. Once all delegates have been accounted for, and it is verified that each member of the delegation is wearing the insignia of that country, the delegation will be admitted to the wedding chapel. They will remain there until the ceremony. The doors will be barred between each delegation, and no one else is to be admitted as the delegations arrive. Is that clear?

*soldiers nod*

Kieven: Now things are going to be a little more difficult when the ceremony ends. Of course, the doors are going to be locked and guarded throughout, and there will be guards flanking Emperor Ed as well as Empress Carolyn. But once the ceremony ends, there will be more chance that an intruder could get in. I need you to escort each and every delegate through the receiving line, through Edenstein Square, and into the palace. Again, the doors will be barred in between delegations. No outsiders must be let into the castle. If that happens, our Empress could die. Do you understand?

*soldiers nod*

Kieven: All right, men. *blond soldier gives him another look* I mean, soldiers. Let's move out.

*Meanwhile, as the delegations begin to arrive, the Edenstein National Symphony Orchestra sets up*

*An Edensteinian Orchestra Lackey sets up the conductor's stand and puts the music in order*

Music for before the ceremony is as follows:

Prelude
The Complete Works of J.S. Bach
The Rite of Spring--Stravinsky
Freebird--Lynryd Skynryd
Kashmir--Led Zeppelin
Pictures at an Exhibition--Mussorgsky

Entrance of the Emperor: Edenstein National Anthem (adopted from Mother Russia, aka the Soviet National Anthem)
Entrance of the Bridesmaids (Buffy, Zofia, and Kelly): Mars, The Bringer of War--Holst (with euphonium solo by Mr. Travis Scott)
Entrance of the Empress: Tannhauser (Pilgrim's Chorus) (with the Edenstein Tabernacle Choir)--Wagner
Postlude: March Slav--Tchaikovsky

*Tori Amos comes out of the curtains behind the orchestra and comes up to talk to the conductor*

Tori: So am I supposed to play during the ceremony too, or is it just for the live concert at the reception?
Conductor: Well, Tori, you need to save your voice for the concert. I know Empress Carolyn is a huge fan and will probably want you to play a lot of your songs.
Tori: All right. Well, I'm going to be pretty bored. Do you want me to play piano for any of the pieces?
Conductor: Sure! Empress Carolyn would love that. And I'll just have my regular pianist play the triangle.
Tori: Sounds good.
Conductor: Plus the Big Bad Voodoo Daddies will also be at the reception.
So you'll get a little break.
Tori: Cool. I'll go get my Bosey.
Conductor: Aren't you going to need help wheeling that in?
Tori: Nah. I'm good.

OOC: Hey all, I know that 1 day = 1 day in LETI, but since we want everyone to be able to make it to this thread before we start the ceremony, we'll wait a little to start RPing it. (We just wanted to post a few of the details this morning. I can't get on Nationstates at work anymore! Stupid library.) If it drags on a little past today, it's all good. (It's not like Edenstein doesn't have the money to let it drag on a couple days!!! Hehehehe.)

Later Em Goodbody wanders over to the Edenstein General Hospital. She easily talks her way past security and finds the big Manarthian, Blackthorn.
Em "Hey big fella how are you doing? Sorry about Mike he can be a real dufus sometimes. You're kind cute for an old guy. Listen to show you no hard feelings, and if you want to get back at your Prime Minister, I can arrange a stinger and launcher to be delivered to your hotel room."

ooc: sorry about being so late......

ic:

Jason Lynch was daydreaming at his desk in the Foreign Relations wing of the DiploCorps, when a loud chatter jerked him back into reality. Wha? Huh? he mumbled as he got his bearings. Awwww, jeez. Another freakin' diplomatic relations mission..... He grabbed the orders from the slot in the wall and started scanning down the page.....*Atten...blah blah......go to Edenstein.....blah blah.......engage in diplomatic....blah blah........ What the hell? I just got back from that last mission. And I had to crawl around in the mud hiding from headhunters while waiting for extraction. Damn...someone must hate me.* Heaving a great sigh, he picks up the phone and dials up the DiploCorps resources allocation deparment, Hello? Yes, this is Jason Lynch....oh hi Mary, How are you doing? Good, good......*small talk*....anyways, I need to put in a request for class III "hostile relations" gear and some heavy duty wea.....what? I can't have it? Why not? If they're gonna send me in the middle of another jungle without backup, I'd better damn well get.......huh? He picks up his orders again, rereading it carefully, *....to Edenstein for a non-hostile diplomatic relations mission. You are to accompany Lt. Cmdr James Mathus (ret) and act as his personal aide during the wedding ceremony..........* Scratching his head in bewilderment, he gets back on the phone with "Mary", Well I'll be damned........a halfway decent mission for once. Instead of trading shots in some sweaty jungle I get to do glorified bodyguard duty.......I'll take that trade. Well, I guess that means class III gear is out.........can I have that class I body armor and "special" attache case instead? Alright, thanks alot babe! Take care.

===============================================

The next day, Jason finds himself aboard a plane headed towards Edenstein, and the wedding. Across the cabin sat the retired naval officer, taking a short snooze in the comfort of his seat. *Ahhh, comfy seats, no one shooting at us....yet. Shit......we even get to land on the ground....haven't done that in ages!*

===============================================

After passing through the usual airport securities, the Sketchian reps are escorted to their lodging accommadations. *Damn...I get a roof over my head. I can probably close at least one eye tonight!* He looks over at the "old guy" *Damn...he's still taking naps. The old coot better not croak on me*

ooc: apologises for any liberties taken getting my reps in. I wanted to catch up to speed with everyone else. Just an old guy who sleeps alot, and a diplo newbie who's seen more excitment at an ant farm that he's experience here so far. He's doing bodyguard duty, so he's armed. Just make him stay outside or something :wink:

::At the hospital::

Blackthorn: 's okay. We've got to many dead PM's anyway.

::At the wedding::

::Killian and Isaskis are dressed in their finest clothing, and ready for the wedding. They arrive and are escorted in through the guards::

Killian: I can't wait for the reception. This is going to be fun.

Isaskis: Why the prophetless void did you have me come along?

Killian: You're the one with the most on site experience with LETI nations.

Isaskis: Only looking at their forces on a map. I don't actually talk to them.

Killian: Well that's the problem. ::looks at itinerary:: Not like a Manarthian marriage at all.

OOC: Greetings Sketch, :-D glad that you could join us.

IC: *Emperor Ed and Admiral Ulonov are sitting down the street in a pub having a few drinks*

Ed: I can't believe how much money she is having me spend on this wedding...

Ulonov: I know, we could be using it to build a battleship...
*gets a beep on his palm pilot* It appears the Diplomats from Sketch have arrived at the hotel.

Ed: Excellent, send a bottle of Vodka over to them...

Ulonov: Yes sir...

*Ed takes another swig of his drink and then goes back to watching the Edenstien Spiders on TV*

At the wedding check point the MadderMikians begin offloading their weapons, after what seems to be an eternity, but in reality is only a couple of minutes. Kazinski looks kind of silly with no shoes, his pants falling down because he has no belt. Em Goodbody looks stunning as usual and she hands out disposable cameras to everybody. She starts on about how the gown is going to look, the floral arrangements, the songs, the service, ... The men as men do at weddings, their eyes begin to glaze over and they mumble over and over; yes, yup, ok, sure, yes, sounds good. They are only thinking of the reception.

::The CoC delegation pull up to the wedding, the two soldiers in there uniforms hand over their service Beretta 92F's to the Edenstein guards. Out of the trunk of the CoC state Porche Cayenne S are two large kegs. They bring them up on hand trucks to the Edenstien Guards.::

Worker 1: Hey lad, mind helping me with this here keg, it's the finest of CoC Beer ::winks at the guard:: I may even be able to spare you a pint.

OOC: Ed, you have my word that both these kegs are the finest Guiness. I am honestly not trying to do anthing.

*the gaurd looks at the keg and goes over and gives the worker a hand*

Gaurd: I love Guiness.. I'm actually getting kind of sick of vodka.... We'll take it to the reception grounds, follow me, I'm sure they'll get a kick out of this!

OOC: Wayne I trust you. You gave me your word.

Al Quin, Taygon's best sniper is walking down the street of the pub. He has a job. Stopping infront of the large glass pane he takes one last drag of his smoke. Flicking it to the ground he exhales the smoke through his nose as his boots smoother the ciggerette. A smirk comes across his face as he starts across the street. He enters an old apartment building. Placing a hand on the stair rail he begins making his way to the top but not before stopping at Apartment #29. A tall Russian looking man nods his head at Quin and tilts his head for him to come in. Without any words the man gives Quin something that resembles a guitar case. Quin looks at him the lays the bag on the counter. Unzipping it he smiles seeing his PSG-1 inside. He reaches in his coat and brings out a large stack of money. He flips out a couple of Marcs (Taygons national currency). "Don't spend it all in one place." saying this with a smirk on his face. He zips the bag back up and begins walking to the door. Opening the door and exiting without exicuting his informant. He continues his way up the stairs until he finds the fire escape leading to the roof. He grabs a nearby pipe and pushes the lid of the entrance up. With a good heave he launches the bag onto the roof. He grasps the ladder and makes his way up. As he stands up the wind picks up and breezes past quins face. Taking a deep breath of the fresh air he smiles again and draws a ciggerette from his pack. He walks over to the edge of the roof and looks across the street at the pub. "Nice clean shot". He lights his ciggerette and leans against the side. Unzipping the bag he removes a wrist holder that containes 12 bullets. He also slides out a black PSG-1. With one last reach into his bag he takes out a syringe and a bottle of medicine. Sliding the syringe into the conatiner, he pulls the end back to fill up the chamber of the syringe. Quin than jams it into his arm with a slight cringe. "That ought to keep me from shaking this time." He smiles and grabs the rifle with one hand and aims it upwards making it stand on the butt. He than slides a bullet from the holder. Sliding back the bolt he places the bullet in, than pushing the bolt back up to secure the bullet was in the chamber. He than places his finger on the safety and pushes it off. Turning around an takes a knee placing the butt of the rifle on his shoulder. He kept the cover on the scope so no sunlight would reflect from the lens. He than drew his attention to the door. "Here kitty kitty"


OOC: I just thought I would spice things up. Go out the back and that will be a hint to me to leave you alone.

OOC: Sorry need him to live.. but we can spice this up a little bit...

IC: *Emperor Ed and Ulonov get up to walk out of the inn to go and get ready for the wedding, their car pulls up in front of the inn and waits for them, A random lieutenant dressed in almost the same exact atire as the Emperor OOC: The Emperor was an Admiral and continues to wear the military uniform IC: Stands up and also begins to leave*

LT: Emperor congratulations on the wedding day...
Ed: Thank you very much, I don't know how fun this is going to be...
Lt: I'm sure it will be fine! *He reaches for the door and steps out but imediatly turns back around, he has his back to the street and is holding the door open*
Is there anything I can do?
Ed: No I think it will be ok... hold on a second, I'll be right there *grabs another drink and sits down at the bar while the LT and Ulonov are by the door*

OOC: You can kill off the Lieutanant but The Emperor has to live..

His eyes caught the vehicle as it pulled up to the building. He smiled and let smoke run from his nose and mouth. Taking his finger from the trigger he flipped up the scope cover. Tightening the butt against his shoulder he squinted an eye and looked through the scope. The cross hairs jumbling between the Lieutenant and the Emperor. He eased the gun and let out a breath. He brought his finger back to the trigger. "Now it time my kitty". Right as he pulled the trigger the Lieutenant shifted weight and the back of his head was in the cross hairs of the scope. His eyes grew wide as he drew the gun back and watched as the back of the Lieutenant's head spit open. "Oh crap". He stood up and grabbed the rifle running for the escape. He forgot about the shell and the bag. He ran down the fire escape as quick as he possibly could. At the end of the fire escape he threw the gun into the alley. He than kicked the ladder and climbed down. He picked up the beaten up gun and began sprinting down the alley. He came into a street and looked both ways. Thats when he saw the bike. Running over a Kawasaki looking bike he jumped on and started it up. He put the strap of the gun over his back and took off down the street aiming for the border.

OOC: If you want you can chase and we can make this a sub rp

http://www.nationstates.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=124757

New thread for the sub RP Lets continue with the wedding.

The MadderMikian delegation sees the young Lieutenant's head explode followed by the distinctive crack of a supersonic bullet. They immdiately and instinctively find cover. Looking around and assessing the situation Prime Minister Mike Oldsmobile says "Just another failed assassination attempt. The assassin didn't even try a second shot." As this was a normal day-to-day event in MadderMike the delegation proceeds to enter the cathederal.

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping does stop to get a large glass of Guiness before entering the church.

Killian: Did you hear something?

Isaskis: Sounded like a gunshot.

Killian: Nah, must have been a backfireing truck.

Isaskis: I can only hope so.

Killian: ::spots the CoC delegates:: Over here!

ooc: is the wedding starting now / very soon now?

ic:

The old retired military man and Jason arrive the luxurious hotel lodgings provided by Edenstein. Entering the foyer of their penthouse suite, Jason spots a bottle standing on a cart just inside the door. Setting down his briefcase he picks up the bottle and the card propped up against it. Without warning, the old man pokes his head around Jason's shoulder Hmmmm, looks like a nice little housewarming gift from the fine folks of Edenstein, let's see what the card says.... plucking the card from Jason's fingers, the old man quickly glances over the card and chuckles, its nice to know some people in this world still have manners. Let's see how that vodka taste chall we? And pour yourself a glass too, you look like you need to loosen up some.

*He speaks! And he's fast......and quiet......who is this old man? I didn't even hear him walking in from the door, much less feel him standing behind me. God damn sleepers....* Stapping out of his silent musings, Jason takes the bottle and begins pouring, Sure thing sir. I'll go layout your whites for the wedding ceremony. Will you be needing anything else? Jason asks, handing Mathus his glass of vodka.

Lt Cmdr Mathus gives a sorta grunt, No hurry son, they'll tell us when they want us to be at the wedding. These things are best not rushed anyways. Mathus takes the glass and walks over to the balcony overlooking the city. Go take care of whatever you need to, I'll be right here. Nice view.......

OOC: Very soon... truest me.. some stuff came up so we got some time yet.. :-/ lol school is a pain in the arse..

*A plane lands at a major Edensteinian airport and 6 men walk out. James M. Dubelco, General Andrew Palko III, General Andrew McDaniel, a hooded figure, and 2 men carrying "large" cases of the finest Sky and Labatt Blue in all of Dubelco.

James: Remember boys, that my favorite beverage, drop it and I personally will see that you are annexed.

They are escorted to a car and driven to the church where the beverages are unloaded. They get out of the car and are walk to the gate.

Palko: I wonder, do they have fountain pop here?

::Mr. T brings Corran's helicoptor to Linux and lands, dropping off the passengers. Emperor Corran, Advisor Tism, Advisor Uzuki, and reporter Elhaym van Houten leave the plane. Elly leaves for the press area. Rom Tism nudges Corran::

Rom: Not bad! Although you should've done more on the helicoptor! Heh heh heh.

Corran: I told you, she merely accompanied us because she's covering the even and was still in our palace when we left. Very funny, by the way, trying to lock us in by blocking the door with furniture.

Citan Uzuki: Emperor, I've received word that some sort of emergencey is going on right now.

Corran: Huh? ::As he speaks, an Edenstein guard walks up to Corran::

Guard: Excuse me, Emperor, but you'll have to stay here untill things are safe.

Corran: Safe? What happened?

Guard: Well I don't know how much detail I can give out. ::Rom walks over and shows the man his retractable claw bracelets and gets a devious grin on his face. The guard trembles:: But you know, it wouldn't hurt since you're an emperor right? There's been an assassination attempt on Emperor Romanov.

Corran: What? Who was it? Oh they probably don't know yet... ::he shakes his head:: Never a dull moment in LETI... well let's head to the hotel. Citan, call Luna and Ruri and tell them what's going on...

Citan: Yes sir.

*Empress Carolyn is getting ready with her bridesmaids, Zofia, Buffy, and Kelly, in the Emperor's Suite in the Edenstein Cathedral*

Carolyn: Wow, this 9 million dollar dress sure looks good on me. *she spins around* It's kind of heavy with all these diamonds though...
Buffy: Don't worry, we're here to carry the train.
Kelly: But I don't know if I'm strong enough!

*Deanna comes running into the room*

Deanna: I'm sorry to interrupt you guys... I know how much of a privilege it is to be a bridesmaid. *narrows her eyes at Empress Carolyn* But I have to tell you there has been an assassination attempt on Emperor Ed.
Zofia and Carolyn: WHAT?
*Zofia draws her high-powered rifle, attached to a leg holster beneath her bridesmaid dress, and goes running out of the room*
Carolyn: I can't believe this! On MY wedding day?? I'M the one who was supposed to have a hit out on me! Why would anyone want to kill Ed when they could kill ME?
Buffy: Um...
Carolyn: This is so ridiculous! Is he okay? Like, is this going to stop the ceremony? Because we have spent a lot of money on this and... *she starts sniffling* I was going to marry my soul mate today!
Buffy and Kelly: Awwww...
Carolyn: Yeah, okay, stop that. Go find out where he is and tell him to get his butt in the cathedral, get all those doors barricaded and start the ceremony. I want to get married before either one of us gets killed! *she thinks for a minute* Besides, if someone tries to assassinate him during the ceremony, do you know how much money I'll get? There's nothing to lose... let's get going. *she claps her hands* Come on, you guys, hurry up! I can't go look for him... he can't see me in the wedding dress until he gets to the altar!

*Buffy and Kelly hurry out of the room, leaving Empress Carolyn alone in the chamber. She looks around*

Carolyn: Uh-oh... maybe I should have told one of them to stay here...

::Corran, Rom, and Citan are sitting in fron of the hotel::

Citan: There's been no word from Luna or Ruri.

Corran: Hmm... Well I guess we'll assume they won't make it since the wedding's starting pretty soon. Any word from Ritsuko?

Citan: I haven't heard from her either.

Corran: Well knowing her she probably got all wide eyed and trigger happy when she heard what was going on.

Citan: Well I guess the best thing to do is just go to the Cathedral...

Corran: Yeah. ::he shakes his head:: There's something taht bothers me about this...

Rom: Well no $*17 Sherlock! There's been an assassination attempt on the Emperor! Heh heh heh. "Ass"assination...

Corran: No, not that. The whole him getting married thing just doesn't seem right. ::shrugs:: Eh, it's probably just me... Let's go...

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping having consumed copious amounts of Guinness wanders around looking for a rest room. He opens a door and finds a pretty lady dressed in a fancy white dress all alone. "Hey, pretty lady do you know where the mens room is?" She looks a little taken aback and didn't really respond. Mike pulls a small snub nosed hammerless Ruger .357 magnum out of his sock.
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"This thing only weighs 25 oz I forgot I had it. Could you hold this until I get back. They just set up metal detectors outside all of the entrances." Mike wanders off looking for relief in the depths of the cathedral.

*after the assasination attempt on emperor ed, he is ushered back to the cathedral where he gets ready, he is dressed in his best formal uniform and is cued up at the back of the cathedral. He stands there listening to the last few bars of one of the brandenburg concertos, when the orchestra hits a big Ab Major chord, and they begin playing the Edensteinian National anthem OOC: Soviet National anthem :-) IC: and he walks down the aisle and takes hjis place next to the alter, he kinda looks at his watch when he gets down there wondering when the rest of the shindig will start*

Hearing a *beep* from his universal organizer, Jason pulls out a compact [palm like] device and scrolls through it. Well sir, it looks like that the wedding will be kicking off soon. Shall we prepare and set out? Hmph! Jason spins around, to see Lt Cmdr Mathus just finish buttoning up his whites. I don't know about you son, but I'd like to not be any more than fashionable late if I can help it. With that, and a little wink of the eye, the Mathus leaves Jason standing bewildered in his room. That old man......jeez, coulda told me that he was already ready to go.....guess I should get fancied up too......

15 minutes later, Lt Cmdr Mathus and Jason Lynch leave the hotel to head to the wedding. Dressed in a standard DiploCorps issued formal attire, Jason was a rather drab figure when standing next to the brilliance of the ex military man's dress whites.

*The diplomats walk thru the door and sit in a middle pew.*

James: Nice National Anthem, whats ours?

Andy: We technically don't have one sir.

James: Make a note of that. That may make people feel better.

Palko: The Emperors here, wheres everyone else, I haven't seen Samsylvannias dignitaries yet? They should have been here first?

James: Who knows, Sammek does like to make a bit of stir. I'm sure the others will be here. This is THE event of the year to be at, even Sketch is here. The rest will show up. I hope, this does start *looks at watch* eventually.

The President of Kay Son wishes both of you much success and fortune in the days to come. He sends his regrets that he cannot come to your wedding but sends a gift of the rare Tunabis Orchid that grows wild in Kay Son's forests. This orchid is the only flower that blooms at night with such a brilliance that it is nicknamed by past explorers as "Earth Star".

::Corran, Rom, and Citan are sitting in the first pew on the groom's side that isn't reserved. Rom keeps looking at the press section and nudgin Corran, who conveniently ignores him. As soon as the huge Ab chord hits, Corran immediately stands up, followed by the other two. They stand and salute as the Edenstein National Anthem plays and Emperor Ed walks to the altar. As Ed passes by, Corran gives him a smile. As Ed takes his place, he glances around at the other people there::

Corran: A lot of people are showing up late...

Citan: Well with the assassination attempt things got a little out of whack. It is too bad though, that Luna and Ruri could not be here, but that's ok.

Rom: Heh heh heh. "Whack..."

Citan: I am however, concerned that I haven't seen Ritsuko yet. I wonder where she is?

Corran: I'm not worrried about her.

Citan: ::looks around:: Hmm. Still no sign of Sammek, Lietzenheiserschmidt, or any of the others. I would think an even like this would draw even them!

Corran: I'm not worried about that.

Citan: Then what?

Corran: It's still Ed and this whole business. I have a bad feeling about this...

::Corran, Rom, and Citan are sitting in the first pew on the groom's side that isn't reserved. Rom keeps looking at the press section and nudgin Corran, who conveniently ignores him. As soon as the huge Ab chord hits, Corran immediately stands up, followed by the other two. They stand and salute as the Edenstein National Anthem plays and Emperor Ed walks to the altar. As Ed passes by, Corran gives him a smile. As Ed takes his place, he glances around at the other people there::

Corran: A lot of people are showing up late...

Citan: Well with the assassination attempt things got a little out of whack. It is too bad though, that Luna and Ruri could not be here, but that's ok.

Rom: Heh heh heh. "Whack..."

Citan: I am however, concerned that I haven't seen Ritsuko yet. I wonder where she is?

Corran: I'm not worrried about her.

Citan: ::looks around:: Hmm. Still no sign of Sammek, Lietzenheiserschmidt, or any of the others. I would think an even like this would draw even them!

Corran: I'm not worried about that.

Citan: Then what?

Corran: It's still Ed and this whole business. I have a bad feeling about this...

::Jay and Bert open he door where Carolyn is standing by herself. Bert's eyes grow wide and he sits down fast behind a bench so Carolyn doesn't notice him. He yanks Jay down with him::


Bert: (hisses a whisper in Jay's ear) Omigosh! Look at that! Do you see that?

Jay: Yeah. I've never seen a wedding dress with that many jewels before! That's great! But how will she walk with all that weight?

Bert: No! You idiot! She's ALL ALONE! Nobody's in here, not even a guard! We can finish this now!

Jay: Oh yeah! ::He stands up::

Bert: (hisses in a whisper) Jay! What are you doing!?!? She'll SEE you!

::Jay walks over to Carolyn, standing directly in front of her::

Hairybackistan sends the following diplomats to the wedding of Emperor Ed and Empress Carolyn......

Bob Yeti, Secretary of Razor Control
Joan Sasquatch, Senator (D), Province of Gillette
Charleton Heston, Minority Representative
Empress Valkyrie, Hot Chick (D)

Have fun, cause remember....Parties at someone else's house are the best because you don't have to clean up......

-Captain Stewy
The Rogue Nation of Hairybackistan :lol:

Hairybackistan sends the following diplomats to the wedding of Emperor Ed and Empress Carolyn......

Bob Yeti, Secretary of Razor Control
Joan Sasquatch, Senator (D), Province of Gillette
Charleton Heston, Minority Representative
Empress Valkyrie, Hot Chick (D)

Have fun, cause remember....Parties at someone else's house are the best because you don't have to clean up......

-Captain Stewy
The Rogue Nation of Hairybackistan :lol:

*In the cathedral, the side door opens and President Peter enters with Brian the dog. Brian leads Peter to a pew in the back. As the Emperor walks up the aisle, Brian turns to see Peter pulling out a nerf gun*

Brian: What are you doing?

Peter: Hey, I have to do something to stay entertained untill the reception!

Brian: What are you...?

*As one of the groom's men stands by, Peter fires into a man's hair*

Peter: He he he he he he he!

::As Killian watches the Emperor walk down the aisle, he spots a large man pull out a gun and point it at one of the Emperor's men::

Killian: Shi... ::Isaskis muffles his cry::

::He sees that it's just a nerf gun::

Killian: This is really going to fry my nerves.

Isaskis: At least we're far away from Dubelco's delegation.

Killian: I just hope we're not seated nearby at the reception.

Em Goodbody asks Mike Bond where Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping is. Mike Bond replies "He went out to see the head protocol administrator to make sure we are not seated next to the Manarthians. What with all the earlier trouble. Oh there he is now."
Mike of M&M Shipping "Whew that's done. I got the protocol administrator to move the Manarthians next to Dubelco at the reception. They seemed to be friendlier towards them. Where did I leave my little .357?"

*Empress Carolyn is standing in her chambers, having just been handed a gun, looking bewildered, when she hears the first chord of the Edensteinian national anthem*

Carolyn: Ohhhh geez. I'm supposed to be walking down the aisle, and I'm stuck here with no bridesmaids to hold my train up.

*suddenly a guy she doesn't recognize walks up to her*

Jay: We'll hold it up!

*another guy following him nudges him*

Bert: What are you doing?
Jay: Come on, she's got to get down the aisle somehow!

*As the music continues to play, Empress Carolyn glides down the aisle. Emperor Ed turns around when he sees her and draws in his breath. Meanwhile, Jay and Bert are panting as they hold up the nine million dollar dress*

Bert: I told you this was a bad idea!

*Empress Carolyn is standing in her chambers, having just been handed a gun, looking bewildered, when she hears the first chord of the Edensteinian national anthem*

Carolyn: Ohhhh geez. I'm supposed to be walking down the aisle, and I'm stuck here with no bridesmaids to hold my train up.

*suddenly a guy she doesn't recognize walks up to her*

Jay: We'll hold it up!

*another guy following him nudges him*

Bert: What are you doing?
Jay: Come on, she's got to get down the aisle somehow!

*As the music continues to play, Empress Carolyn glides down the aisle. Emperor Ed turns around when he sees her and draws in his breath. Meanwhile, Jay and Bert are panting as they hold up the nine million dollar dress*

Bert: I told you this was a bad idea!

::Bert and Jay walk down the aisle behind Carolyn::

Jay: Wow! THis is heavy!

Bert: (under his breath) I can't believe this! We could've had her... and... and... this IDIOT! ::he shakes his head and bites his lip as he carries the back of the dress::


::Near the front of the church, Corran, Rom, and Citan watch Carolyn walk down the aisle. All three are dumbstruck by the jeweled dress, but Citan notices something::

Corran: How can Ed even afford all of this? This wedding has to cost him more than half his military expenses!

Citan: Um, Corran?

Corran: Yes?

Citan: Notice who's carrying her dress.

Corran: ::gets a puzzled look on his face:: The janitors? Shouldn't she be having some of her advisors... or dignitaries... or Tori Amos doing it?

Citan: Yeah, but I still think they look really familiar...

Corran: ::shrugs:: Who knows? Maybe they used to live in HO?

Citan: Hmm...

Sparky is unfortunate to not come however the kelcuts send their best wishes. and their Winter Flower. It grows White in winter when all other plants may die out.

*Emperor Ed Watches as Carolyn Walks down the Eisle with Jay and Bert carrying her train, we gets a puzzled look on his face but forgets about it. Carolyn gets up to the alter and the priest starts going into his marriage spiel, Ed looks over at Carolyn and he has a glazed over, almost fanatic look in her eyes*

Priest: Emperor Ed, Do you take Empress Carolyn for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sicknesss and health for as long as you both shall live?

Ed: *Thinks for a second* I do

Priest: Empress Carolyn, Do you...

Carolyn: I DO LETS GET IT OVER WITH!

Priest: Welll.. *a little shaken* By the power vested in me by God and the Empire of Edenstein I now pronounce you man and wife... you may now kiss the bride...

*Empress Carolyn dosn't wait for Ed to kiss her, she leans forward and wraps her arms around him and smothers him with kisses, After that, they walk down the aisle to the back of the church, Jay and Bert follow afterwards carrying the train*

Jay: *Weeping profusely* I always cry at weddings.... always a bridesmaid and never a bride...

Bert: *Also Weeping* I'm within arms length... She's right there and I can't do anything about it!!!!

::Zev Killian and Paul Izaskis give a standing ovation to the new bride and groom::

Killian: Wow, it seemed like that took 21 years.

Izaskis: Or at least 21 days.

Killian: Well, at least it's time for the after party. We're sitting by the CoC and MadderMike last time I checked. Let's head over.

Izaskis: Sure, and lets go shake Ed's hand. I wonder how long until they have an heir to the throne?

Killian: Jenkins has a pot going. Closest person wins.

Izaskis: Get me in for 9 months. I'll bet he gets her with a silver bullet on the honeymoon.

Killian: Just a sec. ::writes it in his palm pilot:: 50,000 Guildars on 9 months. Okay, let's go to the reception!

Izaskis: Alright! Free booze here we come!

::Corran nudges Tism, who promptly wakes up::

Tism: What? What'd I miss?

Corran: Oh... most of the wedding. It's over now. It was... interesting to say the least.

Tism: So it's time for the reception now?

Corran: Yeah.

Tism: Sweet! I hear Edenstein throws some really hence parties! And if the reception cost anywhere NEAR the cost of the wedding, it'll be Mega Hence!

Corran: Oh, Ed's parties are usually Mega Hence as the are. I'd alsmot say this party could be almost Ultra Hence! ::The two laugh. Citan furrows his brow::

Citan: I'm still curious. Let us go find Edd, then go to the redception

Tism: Yeah, and Elwood, you'll have to dance there!

Corran: Who on earth would I possibly dance with?

Tism: Oh... you know DAMN well who! Heh heh heh. ::he nudges Corran, who shakes his head at Rom. The three walk out of the cathedral looking for Ed::

*As the bride and groom march down the aisle, James get a call on Vibrate*

James: Of all the times....Hello?

What?

I hate those CoC bastards. What do you mean independence?

Recognize them eh? If it means spiting those CoC's then I'll do it. I'll call C&C after this.

No problem, all they needed to say was they were opposite sides with the FootCoc. Call me back if you need it. Bye. *Hangs up*

Palko: Who was that?

James: Business, now lets get wasted!

Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping is standing in the back of the hall when the wedding party emerges he joins his fellow countrymen and states that all is well he got the Dubelco delegation sitting between Manarth and CoC. The best he could get the MadderMikian places were on the other side of CoC. Em is still gushing about the dress and the romantic kiss. Mike of Mike and Mike Shipping says "She will be useless for the rest of the evening.

::The Manarthian and CoC delegations procede out. As Former Premier Robert Connery and wife pass the Emperor, Izaskis moves to shake the Emperor's hand::

Izaskis: Good news Emperor. We had a bit of an incident in Manarth, but non of the Edenstein personel involved were hurt, save one Anti-terrorist soldier that shot himself in the foot. He's in stable condition. Congratulations on your marriage.

::They move to sit down at the reception::

Connery: Too bad that the Maddermikeians are between us.

Killian: It's okay, I'll just move them into where we were sitting. It looks like we beat them. ::Not looking at the placement, he moves the Dubelco seating over two so that he and Izaskis are sitting near the CoC:: Hope they don't complain.

Lieutenant General MacDuff: I'm sure they will, but who cares.

::The HO representatives walk out to Ed. Corran shakes his Ed's hand, then gives him a hug instead::

Corran: Ed you old bear! Congratulations comrade! You surprised us al! Ha ha! ::Ed and Corran chat for a little bit. Tism wanders away for a moment, then returns with a sly grin on his face. Citan looks at him quizzically::

Citan: What are you up to now?

Rom: Oh.... nothing you know? Just going for the "exclusive" if you know what I mean! Heh heh heh...

Citan: Oh dear. I'm afraid to think of what you've done.

Rom: Oh it's nothing big. You'll find out at the reception. Once Elwood over there finishes talking to the Emperor he'll go there. In fact, I can say congrats to Ed a little later. I'm heading over...

Citan: Oh dear. I suppose I should follow...

::At the reception, Corran walks in to look for Citan and Rom. He spies Connery of Manarth and waves to him as he walks over to the HO place setting. As he sits down he notices Rom grinning even more than usual::

Corran: Ok, what's going on?

Rom: Oh, nothing.

::The reception music begins. The Buggles are opening up for Tori Amos, and they begin to play Video Killed the Radio Star::

Rom: You should dance Elwood.

Corran: Oh, come on now Rom! You know the only way I dance is with 4 arrows beneath my feet! Ha ha!

Rom: You should try dancing normally, find a partner perhaps. Heh heh heh.

Citan: You are not insinuating that His Henceness...

Rom: Exactly!

Corran: ::smacks his forehead:: Yeah, the tabloids'd love that.

Rom: And so would you!

::Corran sighs::

::The door opens and Ritsuko walks in. Her face is filthy and she smells like the sewers. She scans the room and waves to Corran, then ducks into the restroom to clean up::

Citan: I wonder what she has been up to?

Corran: Oh, I don't worry about her too much. ::He looks around, still ignoring Rom for now:: I wonder when the bride and groom are going to arrive?

*Emperor Ed and Carolyn stand outside the chruch greeting eveyone after awhile the part gets into full swing, Carolyn throws her bouquet into the crowd. Afterwards the two retire into the palace and begin to pack for their hunymoon*

::Ritsuko walks out of the bathroom just in time to end up in the middle of a crowd. She turns around quizzically to see something flying in her direction. She instinctively throws her hands up, and ends up catching Carolyn's bouquet. The other girls look at her with envy::

Ritsuko: Hmm. Here, someone else can take this. I'm too young! ::She tosses it back into the crowd then turns back to face Ed and Carolyn, who quickly leave the room. Ritsuko returns to the HO table::

Corran: Oh there you are! I almost forgot you were here.

Ritsuko: Hmm? Oh, yeah. Well we took care of the assassin, so there's no more worries there. Gee, Ed and Carolyn sure didn't stay long at their own reception.

Rom: I think Carolyn has her own plans. Heh heh heh. ::He begins making vulgar gestures, which are ignored by rest of them::

::An hour or so later Tori Amos finishes her set and begins to pack up::

Corran: Well, it would appear that Ed and Carolyn were so focused on planning the actual wedding they didn't plan a whole lot for the reception. ::he shrugs:: Oh well, I think it's time to return to Fei Fong Wong anyway.

::The 4 stand up, and make their way back to the helipad::

Rom: So where are they going for their honeymoon?

Corran: I don't know for sure, but I guarantee it's somewhere really expensive...

OOC: Kindly treat this as a Manarthian post. Anyone that matters already knows it's me.

IC: Killian: That wasn't too bad, even sitting next to the Dubelcoans. Well, we'd better get back.

Isaskis: Yeah, especially with elections coming up soon. You don't want it to be said that all you did was sit around at a party your entire tenure as PM.

Killian: No kidding.

::They leave for Manarth and Eastern Detroit, respectively::