NationStates Jolt Archive

NX Noticiero Xenieze

Nueva Boca, Xenieze

Pokemon attacked the new peaceful region of Acombia. The Pokemon have not been identified, due to Xenieze's total lack of Japanese residents. The Xenieze army is stretched to the limit to stop the Pokemon invasion, and is in dire need of help.

Prime Minister Carlos Donnet has released the following statement:

"The Pokemon are ruining life in Xenieze. We request that all nations, please send everyone one of their 12-year old kids with gameboys to Xenieze, so that we may repel these invaders, and god willing, catch 'em all."

It is not yet known how other countries in Acombia are faring

NX Noticiero Xenieze

Nueva Boca, Xenieze

Pokemon attacked the new peaceful region of Acombia. The Pokemon have not been identified, due to Xenieze's total lack of Japanese residents. The Xenieze army is stretched to the limit to stop the Pokemon invasion, and is in dire need of help.

Prime Minister Carlos Donnet has released the following statement:

"The Pokemon are ruining life in Xenieze. We request that all nations, please send everyone one of their 12-year old kids with gameboys to Xenieze, so that we may repel these invaders, and god willing, catch 'em all."

It is not yet known how other countries in Acombia are faring


This is a disatster beyon comprehension. hould it be requested, military support will be given. These vermin must be erradicated/shut in zoos.

OOC: I've been waiting for something like this!

IC:
Perhaps our most prestigious orphanage, Sandler Memorial Orphanage can send kids from 4-7 grades to ID and catch the Pokemon? We do require the equipment to catch 'em, called Pokeballs (6 per kid) if you sell them. Otherwise, we'll have to make our own.

Central Facehuggeria can send troops to annhilate these foul creatures if you want.

OOC: Lets see how you like a 120mm Depleted Uranium slug you stupid pikachu! Muhahahah!

Rebeland recognizes the chaotic situation your country must be in. With respect to the previous statement, Rebeland will send 5,000 ROTN Special Forces Troops, and some recently purchased riot-quelling robots.

The Most Serene Republic of Xenieze will most defintly sell pokeballs to any nation requesting them. We are currently selling them for 100 Bocas per pokeball

Boca to USD exchange rate: 2 to 1

((OOC: Dear lord... :shock: ))
IC:

BURN THEM! NUKE THEM! KILL THE LOVABLE LIL' BASTARDS!
http://invisionfree.com/forums/Corporate_Islands/index.php?act=Attach&type=post&id=130
Joey Dufferson, Head of Resi Beer and Resi Pr0n, Ltd.
Resi Corp.

Calm down, you idiot! We're on the air!
http://invisionfree.com:54/135/37/upload/p129.jpg
Dawn Kradii, Secretary of the CEO
Resi Corp.

Oh, right. So what should we do about these sick twisted genetics experiments gone wrong anyway?
Joey Dufferson, Head of Resi Beer and Resi Pr0n, Ltd.
Resi Corp.

Well, what I say is catch two of each, making that about 700 of them. Then we subjugate them as a slave race and start a breeding program to make more of them, which we only let out into the open when we need a promo for our new line of video games about them. Then we merchandise and make t-shirts, a TV show, toilet paper, lunchboxes, and even crappy card games based on said loveable little bastards.
Dawn Kradii, Secretary of the CEO
Resi Corp.

Genious! Why didn't I think of that myself?
Joey Dufferson, Head of Resi Beer and Resi Pr0n, Ltd.
Resi Corp.

Because... I hate you.
Dawn Kradii, Secretary of the CEO
Resi Corp.

Oh.
Joey Dufferson, Head of Resi Beer and Resi Pr0n, Ltd.
Resi Corp.

ever though of training them? becasue this is no anime and a thunder bolt could take down an F-16, wait,.... what am I saying? I'll pay 25,000 for 500 pokeballs and will send a team to catch them

Why not burn the things ? Or use cemical wepons . ?

What are you talking about? Modern tech and anime-tech are too totally different things...

Penguisiana, I hope youre joking. I cant think of any nation that wouldn't fire a big 'ol can of ignore on the little creatures.

IC: Our offer of extermination still stands.

okay... what was that thoing called? like a pikacha or something.... if it used one of it's electric thingys it could easily kill many people... just in animes the characters are immortal...

Penguisiana, the pokeballs are going to be shipped as quickly as possible. However some unknown type of pokemon are making plane flights out of Xenieze quite difficult.

Anti-matter is found the be highly effective against all Pokemon.
Screw training 'em! GO SPLAT!

(I mean ... Cemical wepondry lol . Like when you kill off bugs or termites lol

)

Central Facehuggeria strongly seconds Dontgonearthere's method of eradiacation. It is the most effective way to eliminate the problem

:? :lol:

The Fedral Union, that was @ Penguisiana :P about the F-16s going up against little yellow rats that have NO SCIENTIFICAL BACKING, the lously, godmodding, sparmy little - -

Ahem. Dontgonearthere's method of eradication is not nearly as effective as the MIGHTY ERASER, but it would probably be the most satisfying :lol: Therefore, I second it.

But then, some people are probably trying to RP here, so let them catch and train them. Or whatever.

As a resident of Acombia My lookouts have not spotted any Pokemon but we will keep a lookout for them.

NX Noticiero Xenieze

Nueva Boca, Xenieze

Pokemon attacked the new peaceful region of Acombia. The Pokemon have not been identified, due to Xenieze's total lack of Japanese residents. The Xenieze army is stretched to the limit to stop the Pokemon invasion, and is in dire need of help.

Prime Minister Carlos Donnet has released the following statement:

"The Pokemon are ruining life in Xenieze. We request that all nations, please send everyone one of their 12-year old kids with gameboys to Xenieze, so that we may repel these invaders, and god willing, catch 'em all."

It is not yet known how other countries in Acombia are faring

The Government of JONSPOTZ shall assist in numerous ways...

We will assist by doing this:

1.) Samus Aran will be cloned and given an extra dose of metriod DNA given to her - she will be sent to your planet to kill off all remaining pokemon. Vanessa Schneider will assist her.

*Air Support will be provided by Rogue Squadron II

2.)Captain Olimar will be snet with his pikmion to help rebuild your cpuntry and region from all the damage and aid the injured.

3.)1 billion currency's of jonspotz will be donated too.

How's that?

- The Jonotheistic Views Of Jonspotz

http://jonspotz.com/logos/newyear.jpg

:twisted: :twisted: I'll send help as soon as possible. would you prefer 500,000 marines armed with our best guns, or 30 million kids with pokeballs. I will just pay 10 million for unlimited pokeballs. maybe even some ultra and great balls too. hey, I used to play and watch and collect that stupid crap. I have a small space fleet, and if you need, I may evacuate your people so they can bombard them with lasers :twisted: :twisted:

:twisted: :twisted: I'll send help as soon as possible. would you prefer 500,000 marines armed with our best guns, or 30 million kids with pokeballs. I will just pay 10 million for unlimited pokeballs. maybe even some ultra and great balls too. hey, I used to play and watch and collect that stupid crap. I have a small space fleet, and if you need, I may evacuate your people so they can bombard them with lasers :twisted: :twisted:

NX Noticiero Xenieze

Nueva Boca, Xenieze

Xenieze Defense Forces, using special equipment, have begun their fight back against the Pokemon. It has also been discovered, that Pikachus are the natural prey of the Komodo Dragon, our National Animal.

Meanwhile, the Pokemon invasion became deadly whenthe headquarters of the Xenieze Asociación del Fúbol, has been attacked, and the entire Men's National Team of Xenieze has died.

XAF President Daniel Hernandez has released the following statement:

"We hope this tragedy will not go unavenged. We can only trust in our God and our Government."

In other news, thousands of rioting soccer fans have looted Pokeshops all over the country, and are out in full force. Outside Marcos National Stadium, thousands of smaller pokemon have been caught and roasted. The Prime Minister Carlos Donnet, implores angry citizens, to stay in there homes, protect their families, and leave the pokemon catching to the National Defense Force and the foreign aid.

An angry soccer fan told NX:

"These pokemon are a scourge. I am glad to be feasting on the blood of our enemy."

NX Reporter:

"How do they taste?"

ASF:

"Sweet... like revenge..."

NX Reporter:

"Thats an awful line:

ASF:

"I'm an awful person"
*chewing sounds*

:lol: :lol: If you need help ill help ya .

100 students of various ages (between 9-13) dubbed the "1st Pokemon Trainer Company" has been sent to the region of Acombia. ETA is expected to be around 2 hours. They have been "anime-ized", meaning that they won't be killed by the Pokemon. They are equipped with 600 credits for 6 pokeballs each, a pokedex, a backpack for potions, and first-aid kits. Once they land, they are to be directed to areas where pokemon can be captured. Is that all right?

We of the Republic of Delicious Frankfurters(tm) would be happy to rid you of these beasts. Our very own Doctor Edward D. Price of Ketchup University's Weiner Institute of Technology has invented a device that is currently being used upon squirrels for the amusement of the royal court. We have been very eager to find a more...practical...use for this mechanism. Enclosed is a diagram:

http://www.villagephotos.com/viewpubimage.asp?id_=7578766

Despite the comical nature of this computer-generated technical blueprint, our invention is indeed very effective. As you can see clearly, we placed an authentic Delicious Frankfurters(tm) hotdog on the ground. As the victim, shown in the diagram as a generic animal, senses the aroma of the delicious snack, he/she/it shall approach the hotdog. Once the victim attempts to pick up the hotdog, various Sharp Instruments of Terror(shown above the hotdog) will automatically activate themselves, plunging into the victim and tearing it into bitesize pieces(sizes adjustible through a control mainframe). I, personally, especially admire the gentleness and humane characteristics of this device. We would be happy to ship this device to you for absolutely no charge, since our economy is a basket case anyway and has no hope for improving its conditions anytime soon. However, we due have a small request...that you ship all remains of the pokemons to us, due to the fact that we currently have a slight shortage of meat for our hotdogs...

Best of Luck,

Horge S'Aurabis

Director of Scientific Research

OOC: Sorry Aligyn's post is mine. I use Aligyn to get rid of all my terrible terrible impulses.

IC:
NX Noticiero Xenieze

Prime Minister Carlos Donnet has released the following statement:

"We no longer require foreign aid, as our armed forces have begun the battle against the Pokemon. However all foreign hunters are welcome, however we require that no biological, chemical, or nuclear weapons be used, in the interest of our citizens."

edit: OOC: Acombia is the region, Xenieze is my country.

You may now receive help from my eagles, as they are unnaturally large, and can catch and eat anything up ot the size of a very large St. Bernard dog. But they will not attack dogs and children, only protesting adults :twisted:

Our young hunters' plane has reached Xeniezen airspace and were nearly attacked by a swarm of Pidgeotto, when electric shocks as part of the aircraft's defense system zapped them out of the air. They request permission to land.

Venore will send aid via supply trucks that will provide food and other supplies while crushing anything that go in their path.

No nukes? That limits my options by quite a bit. Ohh well. We'll have to make due.

400 CF troopers, equipped with powered armor, laser weapons, and heavy anti-tank weaponry load onto a convoy of planes, preparing to exterminate the pokemon threat wherever it lies.

The Armed Republic of Metro Atlanta will gladly sell you some high grade napalm, as well as send a crack team of hunters. They'll bring thier own shotguns and rifles, but you must supply the beer.

OOC: Sorry Aligyn's post is mine. I use Aligyn to get rid of all my terrible terrible impulses.

IC:
NX Noticiero Xenieze

Prime Minister Carlos Donnet has released the following statement:

"We no longer require foreign aid, as our armed forces have begun the battle against the Pokemon. However all foreign hunters are welcome, however we require that no biological, chemical, or nuclear weapons be used, in the interest of our citizens."

edit: OOC: Acombia is the region, Xenieze is my country.

The pimin from my earlier message have been devoured and Vanassa Schnieder got her head munched off. Samus Aran sadly, turned into fungus from an overdose of metriod DNA. That left us with the rogue squadrons. Numerous flying pokemons that could fly swept in and took several down. But the real problem was Mew & Mewtwo. They both could provide forcefileds so they could go throguh space. This finsihed off the fleets. We apologize - but we have to withdraw from this battle. We're now sadden by this contrastrophy. We wish yuo luck.

- The Jonothiestic Views Of Jonspotz

The newly established Republic of The Zakarum would like permission to send in a squad of fifty of our best snipers to help dispose of these wretched creatures.

The Republic of The Zakarum

Right..and while you're at it, representative of Zakarum, why not send a few hundred tanks and marines from the figment of your imagination along with those wonderful snipers? :shock:

Xenieze, In my recent travels I came upon a region known simply as Pokemon. My suggestion is perhaps that your pokemon attack was not simply a wild pokemon rampage but maybe an attack from this far off region. I did not hear this from them though.
Dorreen Wood

"The Holy Empire has but one thing to say in your aid..."

"Yiffysaur! We choos- GAK!!"

A humanoid AI repeatedly beats the diplomatic AI over the head with a baseball bat. "NO!!! NO FURRY HENTAI!! BAD!! BAD!! ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING OUR NEW MOTTO!! BAD!!"

Delicious Frankfurters what a way to great a new memeber of this world....

Why is it implausible that I send in 50 snipers?

My country has not yet finish amassing its military arsenal

The Republic or The Zakarum

This is the Nation of Acombia, the pokemon have overun our defences. We cannot hold them back much longer.

*large thundering sound in background*

They just took out our powerplant, we need reinforcments! Send hel....

*pause*

They are currently attacking our communications center, i don't think i can establish a connection much longer, The rest of the men and I are falling back to the cliffs. Hopefully that will slow them down.

Whats that, why is the earth shaking?

*static*

Commander Jack Ryan Jr. (no relation to the Tom Clancy character) hunched down with a pokeball. He spots a Charmander and decides to tranquil it with a dart before capturing it. A poof sound is heard, as the dart gun fires at the creature. it shrieks once in pain, then falls asleep. Jack throws the ball, and the fire lizard is sucked in. The ball rocks a bit, then is silent.

"Yeah! I caught a Charmander!" He yells, to the embarrasment of his preteen team.

In time, with darting and capturing, the kids managed to capture Pokemon, but of course they get attacked sometimes. With Potions and Full Heals handy, the kids awaken the Pokemon and start using them in the battle against the wild ones.

Quote from a kid:
"If you want to defeat Pokemon, you gotta have kids (or at least the young-at-heart) around, 'cause they are the only ones who can defeat them."

Pokemon trainer battle music (http://www.vgmusic.com/music/console/nintendo/gameboy/untitled.mid) plays in the background. (it's a long one)