NationStates Jolt Archive


Fifty rebels offered unto the mighty god Anthrocoatl

16-12-2003, 04:16
Government officials were shocked when an insolent town of belligerant infidels in the eastern corner of the Holy Empire of Anthrocoatl, may he rule over the world forever, yea and verily.

The rebels refused to understand reason, denying Anthrocoatl as one clearly stated "*****'* ** *** ***********, *** ** **** *******, ******** ***** *** *****. *** *** ******." (the actual statement has been blocked so it will not poison the mind of loyal citizens).

The rebel group, who were blatantly denying Anthrocoatl from their living rooms, now believed to be the site of coersive operations, were arrested by police monitoring them through their bar codes.

A frightened neighbor of one of the leaders, Cruel-and-Inhumane Bastard, sobbed into our dedicated government official's recorder, "You never would have suspected them. They seemed such nice quiet people. I would never have expected them to do this sort of thing.

The foul woman who likely has links with several houses of negotiable virtue, a Mrs. Ima Liar, was taken into custody; obviously no intelligent person could have believed Mr. Bastard was an innocent man and thus likely is also a member of the group.

Ffity of the rebels were brought to the most high and wonderful temple of the greatest of gods Anthrocoatl, feller of multitudes and carrier of the sun(yea and verily), where their hearts were torn from their chests and offered up to Anthrocoatl by the Emperor himself, wisest of the wise, greatest of the great, Anthrocoatl's divine offspring, yea and verily.

Anthrocoatl, creator of the world, cosmic ruler of all that exists, showed his pleasure at the sacrifice through a vision sent directly to his son, and the Emperor in his unfathomable wisdom has declared war on our evil and godless neighbor(rather, foul backstabber waiting for its chance), and through the power of Anthrocoatl, who tamed the stars and hitched them to his great chariot, and the Emperor, the ruler of all the world, the Holy Empire shall conquer. Yea and verily.
Adornia
16-12-2003, 04:19
Let it be known that Adornia highly disagrees with your polocies, and highly religous government. We warn you to stop these blatant human right violations, or other countries, not as peaceful as Adornia, may take notice.

Adornia will offer political asylum to any refugees from Anthrocoatl.
Kazar-Tiyon
16-12-2003, 09:06
A tiny speck of red light, one of the spies of Kazar-Tiyon, flickered about the area...
Doujin
16-12-2003, 09:08
The United Socialist States of Doujin will be monitoring this situation, but will stay out of it diplomatically, economically, and militaraliy at the moment.
Tobal
16-12-2003, 09:11
Infidels! Scum!
The Tobalites, servants of the True Faith, will destroy you!
All Hail the Great God, Fendar!!
Renounce your foolish, false religion immediately, or face the wrath of Tobal! However, if you take up a more tolerant attitude, we will tolerate your vile existance.
-Sarkol, High Priest of Tobal
"Send this message to the leader of those... kzajver (untranslatable term). Our official statement shall be 'Tobal condemns the bloody slaughter of helpless citizens recently witnessed in the "Holy" Empire of Anthrocoatl. If we hear of a repitition, there may be... consequences.'"
"As you command, Holiness."
OOC: Nice! :D That was very well written. It should be interesting seeing how this procedes...
The Giant Moon Laser
16-12-2003, 09:46
In other news, The Empire of the Giant Moon Laser is pleased to announce that our main lens and mirror assembly is fully operational. We are preparing for a low yield test firing in the coming weeks and are looking for a suitable target. Anthrocoatl is high on our list. Congratulations to the citizens of Anthrocoatl! This is a great honour.

Please note that all of the effects of a low yield blast are unknown at this time. You can, however, expect birth defects and widespread blindness but do not worry - the likelyhood of fatalities is quite low.
16-12-2003, 21:23
Insurgents attempting to wound the great fatherland were arrested earlier today boarding an illegal ship headed to the vile wasteland known as Adornia.

"It should be known that all who leave the fatherland are cutting themselves off from it, amputating a piece from our mighty empire, and this unthinkable offense will not be tolerated," said the Emperor's top minister after the arrest.

The fugitives from justice are being tried this afternoon and, as they are unworthy of being made sacrifices, will most likely be drawn and quartered.

The Emperor, wisest son of Anthrocoatl, lord of all creation, yea and verily, spoke unto the nation of Adornia: "Any country which attempts to harm our Holy Empire in such an atrocious manner is our sworn enemy, and your hearts will be torn from your chests and thrown to the dogs."

He continued in an address to the giant moon laser: "Also, our policy of compulsory public nudity will keep us safe from any effects of your laser. So up yours."

As of today, war has been declared on Rafhiustan, that place with the laser, Adornia, and any other puny nation which dares to speak against or attack the Holy Empire. Yea, verily we shall go forth and conquer.
Tobal
17-12-2003, 02:51
OOC: Seeing as Tobal spoke against you, I suppose they're included...
IC: "They declared war?!"
"Yes, Holiness."
"If they want a war, we shall see to it that they recieve one. Pull back all troops from the Disputed Territory and assemble the navy."
"But, Holyness, we are winning in Chanveer-"
"It is the will of Fendar! Marshahnk has never claimed to be holy; there is even a corrupted form of the Tobalite church within the City.
These scum all serve the same false god, and they have threatened Tobal."
"As you command, Holiness." Trangir, one of the Hands of Fendar, strode quickly from the room to give the Supreme General of Tobal his orders.
High Priest Sarkol sent a message to the Emperor of Anthrocoatl, sent a copy to news organizations around the world as well:
This is a last warning to the nation calling itself "The Holy Empire of Anthrocoatl.
Retract your declaration of war and halt the slaughter of your own citizens, who have commited no crime!
If you persist in threatening Tobal and murdering your people, the Sword of Fendar will destroy you.
-Sarkol, High Priest of Tobal
OOC: (The Sword of Fendar is the Tobalite army)