NationStates Jolt Archive


CNN: Scientist arrested because of 'evil plan'

25-10-2003, 21:21
News Flash <CNN>
A top Calcednian scientist was arrested today after telling graduate students about his 'evil plan'. According to one student, Ernest Bobb was telling them how everything was part of his evil plan. The worried students quickly informed authorities, who responded promptly.

Attempting to justify himself, Dr. Bobb spoke with CNN reporters on his way to the squad car. "Look, suppose i was to give my minions a diagram of my evil plan. This diagram would have to include those things which are not part of my evil plan so that they would know those things aren't a part of the plan. Thus they are a part of my evil plan in that they are not."

Unfortunately, all attempts to interview Dr. Bobb since his arrest have met with failure. The CNN reporters who got that brief interview have since been deported by the government, and Calcednie has refused to even disclose the location Dr. Bobb is being held at.

Calcednie released the following official statement: The people of Calcednie are greatful to the dutiful students who brought this menace to society to our attention. Dr. Bobb is being corrected, and his 'minions' will be found. Socially disruptive individuals like this are an aberration, and good citizens should aid the government to keep them from corrupting others.
25-10-2003, 21:46
<CNN>
According to an informant in the Calcednian government, no minions have been found, and all attempts to figure out what this 'evil plan' is have met with failure.
26-10-2003, 05:47
<The Daily Show>
"The People's Republic of Calcednie seems baffled by Dr. Bobb's evil plan. Could it be they can't figure out what it is because they're part of it? What they haven't realized yet is this is just all part of my evil plan...

Of course i have an evil plan, i'm a news anchorman!"
26-10-2003, 19:41
<CNN>
"John Stewart of The Daily Show has apparently been banned from entering the country of Calcednie due to his recent remarks on the show. Curiously, it is unknown how the government of Calcednie found out, since The Daily Show isn't broadcast in Calcednie."
27-10-2003, 08:46
<doUbelieve.com>
"We here at doUbelieve think that this incident with Dr. Bobb's evil plan is merely a cover-up. The Calcednian government has an evil plan, and Dr. Bobb came too close to revealing it, so they hushed him before he could ruin it. Simple as that."