NationStates Jolt Archive


The Holy Roanian Inquisition: Saving us from ourselves.

Roania
04-09-2003, 09:10
In the year 1390, King Wilhelm von Roania the third founded the HRI. Over the years, it has become some of the best trained special forces operatives on the planet. But it's mission has always remained the same. To root out and destroy all evil, everywhere. Now, in declassified documents, we reveal the vehicles and weapons of the inquisition.


http://www.artistsuk.net/acatalog/mini-INQUISITOR.jpg

The HRI coat of arms


http://www.tlucretius.net/7thSea/Characters/inquisitor.jpg

Hoplite3 BattleSuit

The male inquisitorial battle suit.

Weaponary: Pretty much a matter of personal taste. Holy Swords are compulsory, however. Auxilary weapons include: Teleportational ring; Holy Fire ring; Master Crafted pistols (With silver bullets); R-87 submachine guns.

Armor Rating and gimmicks: Equivalent to full plate mail. Loosely. Full Plate Mail weighs more, and doesn't have shock disruptors, a flicker cape, or internal AI. Also, fully pressurised.

AI: Unlike Phalanixian AI, this AI remains almost completely silent, and has no personality. And considering the relationships most Elite's have with their AI, the inquisitors are very thankful.

http://www.gamesfirst.com/previews/jluther/metroidprime/metroid1.jpg

HOPLITE2 Inquisitorial Long Range Combat Suit

While the HRI is a nondescriminational organisation, nevertheless all men are given the HOPLITE3, and all women are given the HOPLITE2. The reason for this is along the lines of; "The women who reach the inquisition got here by using their head. The men got here by using most of the rest of their muscles."

Weapons: Fully internal. The arm cannon contains: 1 missile launcher, 1 short range lazer knife, 4 beam weapons (Standard configuration being power, wave, ice and plazma)

Suit: Same as above. Instead of the cape, however, there is an internal teleportation device.

AI: See above.


http://www.gameblitz.com/images/halo2.jpg

Inquisitorial Dropship

The above picture shows a pair of dropships flying along the cliffs that make up Roania's coastline. Incredibly expensive to maintain, that is actually as close as most Roanians will get to seawater.

Armaments: 6 chainguns. Plazma disperser.

Drive: Anti Grav.

Speed: 130 mph

Crew: 1.

Carries: 5-15 Inqusitors.


Personalities of the Inquisition

http://www.peggytyler.com/gallery/blue%20bikini.jpg

Kigari

Oddly enough, this slim outfit is all most female inquisitors wear under their armor. The rest are generally completely naked. Kigari might look sweet and innocent, but as several outlaws and rude soldiers have found out over the years, she can easily go toe to toe with a man. And kill them. Generally, it's best to treat her with quiet respect. An orphan, she was raised by the Roanian Church. A master of the light magics that some inquisitors wield, she also is pretty nasty with her bare hands.

http://www.sailorjamboree.com/lions_den/squall_sit.jpg

Simon Darquis II

When he learned we got ahold of this photo, he tried to kill us. We don't know why. The descendant of Grand Inquisitor Simon Darquis, head of the HRI during the second half of the 15th century. He carries his ancestor's blade with pride, and is considered a credit to the family. About all we could find out while we were fleeing for our lives.


Training

To become an inquisitor, you have to

a) Spend 5 years in the regular military, and reach the level of captain

b) Kill a vampire

c) Kill a chaos spawn with your bare hands

d) Swim in salt water

e) And make it through the canyon of death, an area layered with i) Zombies, ii) Auto turrets, iii) Chaos Spawn iiii) mines, v) Robot assassins
Klonor
04-09-2003, 09:18
OOC: You used a pic of Samus Aran?
Roania
04-09-2003, 09:20
OOC: Best I could find.
Klonor
04-09-2003, 09:23
OOC: Well, you made a good choice (kick a** game)
Roania
04-09-2003, 09:38
OOC: Thanks. Come on people. I want feedback!
04-09-2003, 09:50
OOC:

Erm, will these guys have anything to do with the Phyrexian Storylines? O_o *shivers*
Roania
04-09-2003, 09:52
Depends. I don't know. A massive explosion in Roania has kept them fairly busy.
04-09-2003, 10:02
Depends. I don't know. A massive explosion in Roania has kept them fairly busy.

*Sigh of relief*
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:03
But, I do have 500 of them.
04-09-2003, 10:26
But, I do have 500 of them.

*Gulp* O_O
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:28
Heh. Bow before me. Acknowledge your true master.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 10:33
Oh. Scary.

- Supreme Director Klaus De Vere, Confederate ISA.
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:36
Oh. Scary.

- Supreme Director Klaus De Vere, Confederate ISA.

Sarcasm doesn't suit you, TC.
04-09-2003, 10:39
[His Exaltedness, Head URVI Inquisitor 'Rictus' Mordant spits in disgust at the despicable nature of the Roanian heretics.]
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 10:39
Sarcasm doesn't suit you, TC.

((What? He's always been sarcastic))
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:42
[His Exaltedness, Head URVI Inquisitor 'Rictus' Mordant spits in disgust at the despicable nature of the Roanian heretics.]

Grand Inquisitor Johannes Richelieu learns of this, and promptly orders the bombing of the so-called URVI hq.
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:43
Sarcasm doesn't suit you, TC.

((What? He's always been sarcastic))

Still rude.
04-09-2003, 10:44
[His Exaltedness, Head URVI Inquisitor 'Rictus' Mordant spits in disgust at the despicable nature of the Roanian heretics.]

Grand Inquisitor Johannes Richelieu learns of this, and promptly orders the bombing of the so-called URVI hq.
OOC: Not a chance. The URVI are a wing of the Redlist Vigilantes, which is a 'nomadic' organisation. They have no official HQ.
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:46
We'll bomb the entire nation then. Thank you for coming. Bloody protestants.
04-09-2003, 10:46
[His Exaltedness, Head URVI Inquisitor 'Rictus' Mordant spits in disgust at the despicable nature of the Roanian heretics.]

Grand Inquisitor Johannes Richelieu learns of this, and promptly orders the bombing of the so-called URVI hq.
Certified Official Archbishop Steven Rangorn learns of this and calls a holy war on the HRI. He is promptly ignored.
04-09-2003, 10:48
We'll bomb the entire nation then. Thank you for coming. Bloody protestants.
OOC: RV isn't a nation (damned inflexible NS), but an orginisation of assorted weirdos and psychopaths.
Protestants? If you want protestants, then bomb Presbyteria!
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:48
Wise decision, protestant. The HRI could eat your boys alive.
Aequatio
04-09-2003, 10:49
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
04-09-2003, 10:50
Wise decision, protestant. The HRI could eat your boys alive.
Quite probably. The URVI are almost and independent orginisation, and therefore would be unable to call upon the Warhogs, who would definitely give the HRI mob a good booting.
04-09-2003, 10:50
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:51
Wise decision, protestant. The HRI could eat your boys alive.
Quite probably. The URVI are almost and independent orginisation, and therefore would be unable to call upon the Warhogs, who would definitely give the HRI mob a good booting.

Then we call in the entire Roanian Army. And watch your warthogs get grilled. What sect of Christianity is your nation?
Aequatio
04-09-2003, 10:53
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!

whatever, I've never cared enough about other nations to be nice to them, especially over religion.
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:54
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!

Then they have no right to call themselves Inquisitors.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 10:56
I don't see why they can't call themselves whatever they choose.

-S. Voltren, Directorate of Copyright, and other such Niggling Legal Things.
04-09-2003, 10:56
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!

Then they have no right to call themselves Inquisitors.
Kidding! The URVI's very catholic.
04-09-2003, 10:58
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!

Then they have no right to call themselves Inquisitors.
Kidding! The URVI's very catholic.
Not Roman Catholic, though...
04-09-2003, 10:58
Haha, just like Northern Ireland... Christians fighting Christians.
Fool! The URVI is aetheist!

Then they have no right to call themselves Inquisitors.
Kidding! The URVI's very catholic.
Not Roman Catholic, though...
Nope, they're Uddersvillian Catholic.
Roania
04-09-2003, 10:59
HERESY! BURN THEM!
04-09-2003, 11:02
HERESY! BURN THEM!
Heresy? Burning?
Uddersvillian Catholics are required by divine law to burn at least six unbelievers per year.
They're also a bit down on excessive technology.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 11:02
HERESY! BURN THEM!

Shouldn't that be "Drown Them?" Much more efficient...

- R. Kel, Confederate Ambassador to Roania.
Roania
04-09-2003, 11:07
HERESY! BURN THEM!

Shouldn't that be "Drown Them?" Much more efficient...

- R. Kel, Confederate Ambassador to Roania.

At the mention of water, all the Roanians developed a slight tic.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 11:12
At the mention of water, all the Roanians developed a slight tic.

Raymond Kel continued.

"Why all heretics deserve such a fate surely? In fact, you could even build a heretic disposal chute so you don't have to go near the water to drown them. Say, a gentle gradiant over a cliff" he really gets going "with the Heretic weighted in such a way that they enter the water quite slowly." he gets a piece of paper out and draws a diagram.
Roania
04-09-2003, 11:17
At the mention of water, all the Roanians developed a slight tic.

Raymond Kel continued.

"Why all heretics deserve such a fate surely? In fact, you could even build a heretic disposal chute so you don't have to go near the water to drown them. Say, a gentle gradiant over a cliff" he really gets going "with the Heretic weighted in such a way that they enter the water quite slowly." he gets a piece of paper out and draws a diagram.


(Why do I get the evil ambassadors?)

One by one, the Roanians begin to back out of the scary man's presence.

_________________________

Now, for all of you who love the uniforms, we're selling them!

HOPLITE3: Around $500000 each. Comes with sword, rings and pistols. FlickerCape included at no extra charge.

HOPLITE2: Same price. Comes with Holy Water amphoula.

Dropship: 45 Million dollars.

10% discount for all allies!
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 11:18
He finished the diagram and held it up

[code:1:bac2727211]


_______________
/ ______________ <--- Heretic In
/ /|
/ / | Cliff.
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
__________|_|_|
Sea |
|[/code:1:bac2727211]
"So, what do you thin- Where are you going?"
Roania
04-09-2003, 11:21
They all make mental notes to never go near the ambassador again. "Evil, evil man." The hydrophobic Roanians all run into their dry showers, trying to clean themselves.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 11:28
The Ambassador then gets back to trying to contract the Roanians to add a swimming pool to the embassy...
Roania
04-09-2003, 11:32
The Ambassador then gets back to trying to contract the Roanians to add a swimming pool to the embassy...

Tactless, isn't he.
The Ctan
04-09-2003, 11:40
Tactless, isn't he.

Not at all. It's only ordinary Roanians he likes to irritate by going on about water. Last week he tried to by a yaght. He's quite capable of shutting up about it when talking to important Roanians. :)
The Resi Corporation
05-09-2003, 02:20
Awww... I wanted to use Samus' Power suit!
Oh well, I call dibs on her fusion and phazon suits!

Also, what exactly is a chaos spawn? Do they have anything to do with the Goddess Eris?
Roania
05-09-2003, 07:04
Just think nasty demons. And the HOPLITE2 suit is only for women.
Roania
05-09-2003, 07:16
Tactless, isn't he.

Not at all. It's only ordinary Roanians he likes to irritate by going on about water. Last week he tried to by a yaght. He's quite capable of shutting up about it when talking to important Roanians. :)

Irritate nothing. It's led to a massive decline in property values. Besides where would he put the yacht? Most of the coast line is cliffs!
The Resi Corporation
05-09-2003, 07:49
Just think nasty demons. And the HOPLITE2 suit is only for women.Ya, but do the Chaos Spawn have anything to do with the Goddess Eris?
Roania
05-09-2003, 07:53
I don't think so. Ask Tor.
The Ctan
05-09-2003, 10:35
Just think nasty demons. And the HOPLITE2 suit is only for women.Ya, but do the Chaos Spawn have anything to do with the Goddess Eris?

No...

Really, this Chaos is much, much worse...
Roania
05-09-2003, 10:46
Not that hard. A bunny rabbit is more dangerous. And how's the Dragon settling in?

((Please mr. Ctan, don't ask where we got the spawn from...))
Tsaraine
05-09-2003, 11:03
OOC: If the Roanians are so scared of water, what happens when it rains? Or if the local river bursts it's banks and floods everything?
And if the Inquisitors are so concerned about rooting out heresy and sin, then why do their female members dress like sluts?
Roania
05-09-2003, 11:12
They all hide inside. And scream.

As for that, well, that armor is very heavy, Roania has a tropical climate, and who wants to argue with an inquisitor?
The Resi Corporation
05-09-2003, 15:25
No...

Really, this Chaos is much, much worse...Warhammer 4K Chaos, right?
The Ctan
07-09-2003, 15:02
Warhammer 4K Chaos, right?

40K, Correct.

And yes, a rabbit can be more dangerous, if you mean the one in Monty Python's Holy Grail.