16-08-2003, 11:19
Article in the Devil’s Desert Enquirer
Sea Serpent Slaughters Sailors! by Staff Writer Iain Jones
Have you lost a loved one to the feared Insanity on the Devil’s Blood Ocean? Have your fish stocks been plummeting? Has, perhaps, your company or cartel lost a boat out in the big wide blue recently? I’ll tell you why: sea serpents! Read on to find out more.
The past few months have seen a lot of excitement in the Devil’s Desert region. An internal war over Aeigeron and Kinarli – currently undergoing diplomatic talks; the founding of a Regional Ambassadorial Council on the grounds of the ex-nation of Excrucior; an incursion by Melkor Unchained and military posturing by Menelmacar; the regional involvement in war against Raem and Roania; massive foreign involvement in the Austrin-Ontis elections; and the production of highly profitable titillating calendars.
It’s barely any wonder, then, that such things as small as missing fish stocks and an increase in cases of insanity amongst sailors returning from the Devil’s Blood Ocean have gone unnoticed by the majority. Luckily for the Devil’s Desert Enquirer and the known world, I’m not one of the majority.
About three years ago, the crew of the Kakalin whaler the ‘Aki Lara Makaschnaka’ set off to go trawling for blubber on the west coast of that country. They never returned. The weather was calm, there were no storms. They lost radio transmission half way through a broadcast and just disappeared.
Two years ago, the Atheran submarine the ABS Heffalump reported that it was getting unusual readings from deep within an ocean trench and that they were going to investigate. They were never heard of again.
Three months ago, the Murderous Tendencies warboat the ‘Striking Skies’ reported seeing an illegal whaling vessel crumple so badly after they launched a single torpedo into it that all was left was twisted scrap metal.
Two months ago the matter of depleted fish stocks throughout the region was brought before the Regional Ambassadorial Council, who elected to do nothing.
One month ago the cruise ship the ‘Lady’s Favour’ disappeared in a sudden fog when passing through the Excrucior straits. Naval fleets in front and behind reported no sign of her. No bodies were found washed ashore.
Last week, Espresso to Go Finance line manager Neil MacHavoy and two friends took sail for the southern coast from his private yacht in Fyrn. I was one of those friends.
The events that occurred that night still give me nightmares. I was watching the rudder, as the other two were asleep. It was a quiet night, with the wind aft and the waves small. In the early hours of the morning, I noticed that it was getting lighter. I assumed that it was dawn approaching – but, when I checked my watch, it was 3am. At least six hours were due til dawn. I watched on, confused, as it got brighter. Then I noticed the source of the illumination: the sea itself. Before my horrified eyes, I could see some infernal phosphorescence getting stronger – or closer. It seemed like it didn’t end – I must have been miles from land, at this point.
The waves started to rise, the ship rock around. After about twenty minutes, I could see with my telescope that the lights went on for miles in each direction.
Just then, my shipmates finally woke up and came on deck. Not wanting to bias any results I needed to publish later, I then waited for them to spot the light in the sea. Sadly, by the time they did, it had almost faded. The sea serpent was obviously unwilling to consume us so close to shore, and had disappeared. Mr MacHavoy and myself testified to what we had seen when we reached the shore; our third companion wishes to remain uninvolved and denies what he had so clearly seen and so I agreed not to publish his details in relation to this article.
I call upon the people of the world to condemn this seeming hush-operation and call for further investigation! People are dying, and it’s our job to stop it!
I.J.
Sea Serpent Slaughters Sailors! by Staff Writer Iain Jones
Have you lost a loved one to the feared Insanity on the Devil’s Blood Ocean? Have your fish stocks been plummeting? Has, perhaps, your company or cartel lost a boat out in the big wide blue recently? I’ll tell you why: sea serpents! Read on to find out more.
The past few months have seen a lot of excitement in the Devil’s Desert region. An internal war over Aeigeron and Kinarli – currently undergoing diplomatic talks; the founding of a Regional Ambassadorial Council on the grounds of the ex-nation of Excrucior; an incursion by Melkor Unchained and military posturing by Menelmacar; the regional involvement in war against Raem and Roania; massive foreign involvement in the Austrin-Ontis elections; and the production of highly profitable titillating calendars.
It’s barely any wonder, then, that such things as small as missing fish stocks and an increase in cases of insanity amongst sailors returning from the Devil’s Blood Ocean have gone unnoticed by the majority. Luckily for the Devil’s Desert Enquirer and the known world, I’m not one of the majority.
About three years ago, the crew of the Kakalin whaler the ‘Aki Lara Makaschnaka’ set off to go trawling for blubber on the west coast of that country. They never returned. The weather was calm, there were no storms. They lost radio transmission half way through a broadcast and just disappeared.
Two years ago, the Atheran submarine the ABS Heffalump reported that it was getting unusual readings from deep within an ocean trench and that they were going to investigate. They were never heard of again.
Three months ago, the Murderous Tendencies warboat the ‘Striking Skies’ reported seeing an illegal whaling vessel crumple so badly after they launched a single torpedo into it that all was left was twisted scrap metal.
Two months ago the matter of depleted fish stocks throughout the region was brought before the Regional Ambassadorial Council, who elected to do nothing.
One month ago the cruise ship the ‘Lady’s Favour’ disappeared in a sudden fog when passing through the Excrucior straits. Naval fleets in front and behind reported no sign of her. No bodies were found washed ashore.
Last week, Espresso to Go Finance line manager Neil MacHavoy and two friends took sail for the southern coast from his private yacht in Fyrn. I was one of those friends.
The events that occurred that night still give me nightmares. I was watching the rudder, as the other two were asleep. It was a quiet night, with the wind aft and the waves small. In the early hours of the morning, I noticed that it was getting lighter. I assumed that it was dawn approaching – but, when I checked my watch, it was 3am. At least six hours were due til dawn. I watched on, confused, as it got brighter. Then I noticed the source of the illumination: the sea itself. Before my horrified eyes, I could see some infernal phosphorescence getting stronger – or closer. It seemed like it didn’t end – I must have been miles from land, at this point.
The waves started to rise, the ship rock around. After about twenty minutes, I could see with my telescope that the lights went on for miles in each direction.
Just then, my shipmates finally woke up and came on deck. Not wanting to bias any results I needed to publish later, I then waited for them to spot the light in the sea. Sadly, by the time they did, it had almost faded. The sea serpent was obviously unwilling to consume us so close to shore, and had disappeared. Mr MacHavoy and myself testified to what we had seen when we reached the shore; our third companion wishes to remain uninvolved and denies what he had so clearly seen and so I agreed not to publish his details in relation to this article.
I call upon the people of the world to condemn this seeming hush-operation and call for further investigation! People are dying, and it’s our job to stop it!
I.J.