NationStates Jolt Archive

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

What was the best date you ever went on?

What was the worst?

What is your ideal date?

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

Can you clarify this for me please?

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Nah, it's not too different from hanging out, Although I do think it could be alittle more informal than it is. More along the line of "Hey, want to hang out, maybe watch a DVD?" kinda thing. The whole "Hey, want to go out on Friday night?" is kinda hokey.

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

Eh, I just want my date to have fun, and enjoy herself. However I have learned on the movie front, you have to switch off. One week she decide what to watch, next week it's your turn. For guys, you should be a gentlemen and considerate. That means opening doors for her, walking on the outside of the sidewalk, don't call her "bitch" or whatever names idiots are calling their girlfriends nowadays.

What was the best date you ever went on?

I cannot remember. Any good dates I've had, my memories of them have been spoiled by the "then" girlfriend actions later on.

What was the worst?

This date didn't happen, but one woman decided that I should pay for not only our dinner (her and me), but for her cousins as well. I may believe in the "guys pay for the dinner", but that doesn't mean you can take advantage of my good nature.

There were a few others.

What is your ideal date?

I rent 3663R (an aircraft) for the day, I fly her up to Blue Ridge, we have a picnic, walk the Blue Ridge Parkway trail, then we wait until after it gets dark and we fly back. That way we can see all the pretty lights. :)

That way I show off my mad piloting skills. :D

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

er, what?


Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Archaic? Why? How else would you meet new people?


Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

I didn't know there were any...


What was the best date you ever went on?

Date with a cute Dutch guy I met online. Most fun I ever had in one evening, and the sex was pretty amazing.
I'm still a little sad now and then that we couldn't make it last.


What was the worst?

Blind date that turned out to be bald, and with bitten-off fingernails (down to that point where the tip of the finger appears to be curling round back over the nail). *shudders*
The only thing worse than bitten-off fingernails are bad teeth, really.


What is your ideal date?

Cute guy or girl, lots of fun and giggles, great sex.

...Blind date that turned out to be bald, and with bitten-off fingernails ...

Hey, fortune favours the bald or so I've heard

Hey, fortune favours the bald or so I've heard

Sorry, I should have been more clear : His head was shaved.
Not something I find too attractive... especially when accompanied by a hood. ;)

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

What was the best date you ever went on?

What was the worst?

What is your ideal date?
1) Presumably, going out with another adult in response to some variation of, "Would you like to go...."

2) Only for people who don't have any contact with other actual, breathing humans.

3) Treat each other with respect -- additionally, buying dinner/drinks/movie tickets does not mean you get an E ticket to Bedroomland (then again, it doesn't mean it's off the table if that's what both people want.)

4) Best date was the day I met my fiance. At a Renaissance Faire. We were both in costume, my dress was coming unlaced, and he rescued me from an imminent catastrophic wardrobe malfunction... :fluffle: (The dress would have fallen off.) His comment: "First time I ever helped a lady into her clothes three minutes after I met her." :D

5) Worst date: ugh. Went out to eat, got food poisoning. 'Nuff said.

6) Ideal date: Romantic picnic in a state park/other amazing landscapes/views.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

For me, hanging out with someone of the opposite sex I want to have sex with.

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

No, it's quaint.

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

Yes. #1 Rule, there are no rules. #2 rule, see rule #1 for any questions.

What was the best date you ever went on?

Hmm. I guess it was the woman who got me into skydiving - our first date had a plane ride and a fall from 11,000ft.

What was the worst?

Hmm, now that's a tough one. I guess the time I had to wrestle a knife away from her when she tried to stab me.

What is your ideal date?

I don't know anymore. I've seen and done so many different kinds, it's hard to say what an ideal is.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

I'd assume that it's a meeting, normally between 2 people to assess romantic/physical capacity.


Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

I don't think so.


Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

I believe applying rules to the situation would distort the impression you were seeking to get? If every man and woman comes across as perfect because 'that's the rules' how would you work out the asses from the awesome people?



What was the best date you ever went on?

I've never been on a date before. All of my romantic relationships formed by advancing previous friendships unintentionally.


What is your ideal date?

This is a simple question surely? My ideal date would be to spend time with someone who has the same interests as me, who has the personality I seek, at a fabulous restaurant where the food is perfect. Fine company, fine food... That's not just my idea of an ideal date.

4) Best date was the day I met my fiance. At a Renaissance Faire. We were both in costume, my dress was coming unlaced, and he rescued me from an imminent catastrophic wardrobe malfunction... :fluffle: (The dress would have fallen off.) His comment: "First time I ever helped a lady into her clothes three minutes after I met her." :D


Awwww, that's really cute. :)

Awwww, that's really cute. :)
I know. :D So is he.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

What was the best date you ever went on?

What was the worst?

What is your ideal date?

I think "dating" in the traditional sense is getting much rarer. I cannot offhand think of even one couple of my acquaintance who weren't good friends before they started "dating," and so there really wasn't the whole get-dressed-up-and-make-awkward-small-talk aspect at all. That's not to say that there aren't plenty of couples who still begin their relationships that way, but it's not nearly as ubiquitous as it once was.

Personally, I don't really worry about defining it, and I certainly don't set "rules." If you are approaching dating from a one-size-fits-all, here-is-how-you-deal-with-all-those-crazy-men/women perspective, you're already screwing up. The only sensible rule I can think of would be something like "treat your date like a person, and not either a magical angel of perfection or just an object you want to hump" - which is pretty much a rule for dealing with people, period, when you come right down to it.

I think "dating" in the traditional sense is getting much rarer. I cannot offhand think of even one couple of my acquaintance who weren't good friends before they started "dating," and so there really wasn't the whole get-dressed-up-and-make-awkward-small-talk aspect at all. That's not to say that there aren't plenty of couples who still begin their relationships that way, but it's not nearly as ubiquitous as it once was.

Personally, I don't really worry about defining it, and I certainly don't set "rules." If you are approaching dating from a one-size-fits-all, here-is-how-you-deal-with-all-those-crazy-men/women perspective, you're already screwing up. The only sensible rule I can think of would be something like "treat your date like a person, and not either a magical angel of perfection or just an object you want to hump" - which is pretty much a rule for dealing with people, period, when you come right down to it.
True, I've never been on a real date.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?


There's a person, and there's the fruit of a palm tree.

OR

Person A is supposed to meet person B at place X and time Y. About 30 minutes before time Y, person B is at place Z, which lies at a distance from place X that makes impossible for person B to reach place X at time Y, short of warp drives.


Main Entry: 1date
Pronunciation: \ˈdāt\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, ultimately from Latin dactylus — more at dactyl
Date: 14th century
1 : the oblong edible fruit of a palm (Phoenix dactylifera)
2 : the tall palm with pinnate leaves that yields the date



Main Entry: 2date
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin data, from data (as in data Romae given at Rome), feminine of Latin datus, past participle of dare to give; akin to Latin dos gift, dowry, Greek didonai to give
Date: 14th century
1 a: the time at which an event occurs <the date of his birth> b: a statement of the time of execution or making <the date on the letter>
2: duration
3: the period of time to which something belongs
4 a: an appointment to meet at a specified time

True, I've never been on a real date.

...

I'm not sure if you've had real puberty yet either.

True, I've never been on a real date.

What is a "real" date?

...

I'm not sure if you've had real puberty yet either.

You're hilarious. Going on a date and getting laid are not quite the same thing.

You're hilarious. Going on a date and getting laid are not quite the same thing.

That's nice. I'm also not sure we should judge the world based on the life experience of a 14 year old.

that's nice. I'm also not sure we should judge the world based on the life experience of a 14 year old.

16.

16.

Oh. Wow. You sure showed me. :rolleyes:

Oh. Wow. You sure showed me. :rolleyes:

I did, didn't I? Just cos you were still a virgin at 16 doesn't mean everyone was.

That's nice. I'm also not sure we should judge the world based on the life experience of a 14 year old.
16.
Oh. Wow. You sure showed me. :rolleyes:
I did, didn't I? Just cos you were still a virgin at 16 doesn't mean everyone was.

It's like being back in the playground! No pushing now.


The last time I went on a date, it involved getting hammered and ended with unexpected first-date sex. That ranks fairly high in my book (plus the fact it went on to a four-year relationship of good quality)

Most novel date; game of chess with shot of vodka when a piece was taken.

I really can't think of a worst date, apart from every one where it became obvious we didn't have much in common.

It's like being back in the playground! No pushing now.



He started it. http://209.85.12.227/11914/116/emo/tongue.gif

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone? If she considers it a date, then it's a date.

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more? God I HOPE not!

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow? my only rule would be that she has fun/enjoys the date.

What was the best date you ever went on? ... :(Never went on a 'date'.

What was the worst? ... :D Never went on a 'date'.

What is your ideal date? one that she enjoys.

What is a "real" date?

That depends which Disney show aimed at 'teens' you're watching.

That depends which Disney show aimed at 'teens' you're watching.

Eh?

is it just me or is this thread rather less scary than the title suggests?

er take a quiz I guess:

1) er two people I guess who are feeling incredibly under pressure not to fuck up? now you understand politics :)
2) nah if it gets you out the house I guess...dates can involve ice cream yes?
3) tons probabaly but they happen to be less rules more avoiding girls who will stab me
4) er an official date I've never done but 2 retards bowling was fun
5) well we was on a night out and she was a pretty cool person sober but drunk (and she wore a horrendous outfit *shudders*) the lessen is girls don't drink if your a horrible drunk and if your a lightweight don't keep up
6) take me to an explosives factory :$

Oh. Wow. You sure showed me. :rolleyes:

I'm confused you seem to be being a dick to someone (I assume) far younger than you for reasons I cannot fathom :confused:

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?

I don't know. That changes from person to person.

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?

Not really. It helps you get to know the person you're dating.

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?

Respect is the main one.

What was the best date you ever went on?

I guess with my ex-fiancé. But that's colored with how bad things ended.

What was the worst?

Jordi, he was at uni with me. He spoke so much about his area of study and about himself that I just got fed up and didn't follow up.

What is your ideal date?

I'm past thinking about such things.

Jordi, he was at uni with me. He spoke so much about his area of study and about himself that I just got fed up and didn't follow up.




Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? I never dated you pre-transition. :P

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? I never dated you pre-transition. :P

Are you denying it happened?!:eek:
*runs away, sobbing*


Jordi was from Mallorca. Quite cute, if smallish. He was a bright man, one of the best in science department. But he spoke so much. He was too arrogant at times and I dislike arrogant people. I guess too that out difference was that he also was too practical and I am not practical at all.

A date is where you hang out with someone, and might get a kiss at the end.

It's an awfully complicated archaic process. I seem to not follow the rules.

I seem to not follow the rules.

does this smell like chloroform to you?:p

I did, didn't I? Just cos you were still a virgin at 16 doesn't mean everyone was.

Good lord you're ridiculous.

As for dating...I have very little experience.

In fact, I don't even like dating. Always makes me far too nervous.

On that basis I'm pretty sure I'll end up being alone for the rest of my life. Which bothers me of course but I'll get used to it.

... :(Never went on a 'date'.This white color thing is really interesting, didn't know it was possible on this forum :)

What is your ideal date?

Extreme Ironing (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQOqTbKkDC8)

I'm confused you seem to be being a dick to someone (I assume) far younger than you for reasons I cannot fathom :confused:

We are talking about Neo Art.

We are talking about Neo Art.

I'm confused you seem to be being a dick to someone for reasons I cannot fathom :confused:

I'm confused you seem to be being a dick to someone for reasons I cannot fathom :confused:

We are talking about Blouman Empire.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone? Them agreeing to go on a date with me, or me agreeing to go on a date with them.

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?
How would it be? Even if you're just sitting around the house eating pizza and watching a movie, it can be a date.
Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?The standard "don't be a dick"

What was the best date you ever went on? It involved a lake, and an awkward encounter with a police officer.

What was the worst?I've never really had an awful date...

What is your ideal date?Varies depending on whom it is with and what my mood is. Never going out to a movie though.

Can you clarify this for me please?



Nah, it's not too different from hanging out, Although I do think it could be alittle more informal than it is. More along the line of "Hey, want to hang out, maybe watch a DVD?" kinda thing. The whole "Hey, want to go out on Friday night?" is kinda hokey.
Well, sort of this. What is the difference between 2 friends hanging out, and 2 friends going on a date? Is it a matter of one person paying for another? Is it defined by how the outing is set up ("Wanna go out?" vs "Wanna hang out?")? Is it a question of whether there is a kiss, or hand-holding, or other romantic body language stuffs? Is it a date when both people want it to be or consider it one?


That means opening doors for her, walking on the outside of the sidewalk, don't call her "bitch" or whatever names idiots are calling their girlfriends nowadays.

Eh, don't close the door on me, but if I'm walking ahead, I have perfectly good arms and am entirely capable of holding the door for someone else. Also, there is no real current etiquette for where a man should walk, so far as i know. The standard has changed over the years with technology, and where a gentleman stood in the part was primarily in an effort to shield the lady from splatters of mud from carriage wheels or chamber pots being dumped out of windows. No real need for protection from either any more.

And some girlfriends like to be called "bitch." ;)


I cannot remember. Any good dates I've had, my memories of them have been spoiled by the "then" girlfriend actions later on.
I suppose I must consider myself very lucky in my ability to isolate my memories and feelings on certain events and occassions.


This date didn't happen, but one woman decided that I should pay for not only our dinner (her and me), but for her cousins as well. I may believe in the "guys pay for the dinner", but that doesn't mean you can take advantage of my good nature.
Odd, I would think if her extended family were there, it wouldn't exactly be a date, would it?

I rent 3663R (an aircraft) for the day, I fly her up to Blue Ridge, we have a picnic, walk the Blue Ridge Parkway trail, then we wait until after it gets dark and we fly back. That way we can see all the pretty lights. :)

That way I show off my mad piloting skills. :D
awww

Archaic? Why? How else would you meet new people?
Most of the people I work with meet new people at bars and then they go out in large groups of friends to bars or clubs and dance or drink and hang out. I guess I don't really think of that as dating, since in my head a date is more of a one-on-one thing. Which relates to the first question: does a date have to be one-on-one, or a set of couples? Or can it be a date if you are out with a bunch of friends?



I didn't know there were any...
There are certain date killers. I was on a date once, and the guy I was with shushed me. I was appalled and couldn't WAIT to leave. I wasn't being any louder than I usually am, and we weren't in a museum, library, or theater. We weren't even in a fancy restaurant, just a casual place that mostly served sandwiches. He rather rudely asked if I'd had trouble hearing him. In truth, yes, I had, although I was better off not knowing what he was saying, it turns out. So, yeah, 'shushing' is a big no-no in my book.

Date with a cute Dutch guy I met online. Most fun I ever had in one evening, and the sex was pretty amazing.
I'm still a little sad now and then that we couldn't make it last.
What did you guys do that was so much fun, if I may ask?


Blind date that turned out to be bald, and with bitten-off fingernails (down to that point where the tip of the finger appears to be curling round back over the nail). *shudders*
The only thing worse than bitten-off fingernails are bad teeth, really.
Awww :( *hides bitten fingernails


Cute guy or girl, lots of fun and giggles, great sex.
:D

Personally, I don't really worry about defining it.

I'll confess. Until recently I'd never really worried about defining it either.

But then I went out with this girl, and we are both really flirty, and we talk but we never used to hang out. But lately we've been hanging out together a lot. And I can't figure out if we are just two friends who are spending time together, or if we are doing the whole, old-fashioned, taking-it-slow courtship/getting to know you better sort of dating. It is pretty easy for my to think of them as dates, but I don't know how she feels about it. So, I decided to turn to the internet for answers, as silly as that sounds :p

If she considers it a date, then it's a date.
What if you do NOT consider it a date?

God I HOPE not!

my only rule would be that she has fun/enjoys the date.
:) :)
... :(Never went on a 'date'.

... :D Never went on a 'date'.

how has someone as charming and cool as you managed that??????


one that she enjoys.
Awesome.

is it just me or is this thread rather less scary than the title suggests?
Why did you think it'd be scary??

er take a quiz I guess:

1) er two people I guess who are feeling incredibly under pressure not to fuck up? now you understand politics :)
haha, so if you just get along really well and are totally relaxed, it's not a date? That's a shame, seems like that'd be the most fun :p
2) nah if it gets you out the house I guess...dates can involve ice cream yes?
Not only can, but should, I would say.
3) tons probabaly but they happen to be less rules more avoiding girls who will stab me
Hahaha, definitely a good starting point :tongue:
4) er an official date I've never done but 2 retards bowling was fun
Why wasn't it an official date? Bowling can be so much fun :D
5) well we was on a night out and she was a pretty cool person sober but drunk (and she wore a horrendous outfit *shudders*) the lessen is girls don't drink if your a horrible drunk and if your a lightweight don't keep up
Yeah, it's important for us lightweights to know it's okay to just pace ourselves. Although I like to think I'm generally a pretty entertaining drunk.

6) take me to an explosives factory :$

>.>
<.<
*backs slowly away*

Extreme Ironing (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQOqTbKkDC8)

"Oh baby, I'll press your starches"?

Them agreeing to go on a date with me, or me agreeing to go on a date with them.
So it has to be established as a date, first, for it to count?


How would it be? Even if you're just sitting around the house eating pizza and watching a movie, it can be a date.
I think maybe I sort of meant "dating" prior to being an item or involved or whatever with the other person. I know lots of people who go on dates with their SOs, not so many who go on a date to test waters and get to know someone.
The standard "don't be a dick"

Aww man, I'm never gonna have a successful date :(
It involved a lake, and an awkward encounter with a police officer.Hahahahaha AWESOME

I've never really had an awful date...
luuuuucky. . . .

Varies depending on whom it is with and what my mood is. Never going out to a movie though.
Yeah, I think I'd probably have to agree.

does this smell like chloroform to you?:p

well... the rule is the victim gets the chloroform... so if the rules are NOT followed... :p

This white color thing is really interesting, didn't know it was possible on this forum :)
;)
What if you do NOT consider it a date?
Rule #1... never argue with the female. :p

how has someone as charming and cool as you managed that?????? its called being very shy about meeting people. :(

Wustershershershaush, are you looking for dating advice?

Wustershershershaush, are you looking for dating advice?

I am hoping to successfully woo this girl this summer. So, first I'm trying to figure out if the day I spent with her qualifies as a date. Or, more to the point, if it is possible/likely that she thought of it as a date. But if you HAVE any dating advice you'd like to share, I'd be happy to hear it. I haven't ever really done anything like this before, so I figured I'd ask NSG.

I am hoping to successfully woo this girl this summer. So, first I'm trying to figure out if the day I spent with her qualifies as a date. Or, more to the point, if it is possible/likely that she thought of it as a date. But if you HAVE any dating advice you'd like to share, I'd be happy to hear it. I haven't ever really done anything like this before, so I figured I'd ask NSG.

Oh, sure, we're a helpful lot.

A nice dinner out at a nice restaurant is a good place to start. It may be cliche`, but it works surprisingly well. After the dinner, take her out to a nice secluding spot, preferably a bluff overlooking a lake or a river. You may want to call a pilot weather briefer to make sure the sky will be clear that night.

By the way, something that all women really like is a man who can play an instrument, and the more uncommon the instrument the better. I suggest an oboe or an accordion. That way, if you feel that it's going well, you can bust out your instrument and play her a song. Women love that.

Other than that, use your best judgment for the rest of the date.

However, at the end, make sure that you kiss her goodnight. Also, if she invites you in for a nightcap, she's not interested in a drink. In order for her to continue to have respect for you, it's very very important not to sleep with her on the first date. Even the second date is questionable.

At some point, you should serenade her under her window or balcony using your instrument. She'll love that. It's romantic and shows that you actually care.

If you have any more questions for me, never hesitate to ask.

hehe I wouldn't know anymore, has it changed? I haven't had a date for 20 odd years.

I am hoping to successfully woo this girl this summer. So, first I'm trying to figure out if the day I spent with her qualifies as a date. Or, more to the point, if it is possible/likely that she thought of it as a date. But if you HAVE any dating advice you'd like to share, I'd be happy to hear it. I haven't ever really done anything like this before, so I figured I'd ask NSG.Yeah, here's some advice: Worry less about whether it was a date and more about whether she seemed interested in you. None of my dates have lead to relationships or sex, whereas spending a day together certainly has.

Why did you think it'd be scary??

more "omg please someone go out with me internet threads" where everyone within 200 miles of one another meet up for desperation sex

haha, so if you just get along really well and are totally relaxed, it's not a date? That's a shame, seems like that'd be the most fun :p

of course not! much like if you do really well in a job interview odds are your drunk

Hahaha, definitely a good starting point :tongue:

*currently has mental patient who thinks I stole her ipod being completely mental*

Why wasn't it an official date? Bowling can be so much fun :D

cus nobody said it was a date

Yeah, it's important for us lightweights to know it's okay to just pace ourselves. Although I like to think I'm generally a pretty entertaining drunk.

crying in the corner is not entertaining

>.>
<.<
*backs slowly away*

I never say no to a girl with a box of matches :wink:

well... the rule is the victim gets the chloroform... so if the rules are NOT followed... :p

all of the not remembering what you did last night none of the regret

Dating advice.
1. have something you like to do.
do it well. be able to talk about it in non nerd terms.
2. talk to the girl
3. listen to the girl.
do these three things and you will never be without female company.

Oh, sure, we're a helpful lot.

A nice dinner out at a nice restaurant is a good place to start. It may be cliche`, but it works surprisingly well. After the dinner, take her out to a nice secluding spot, preferably a bluff overlooking a lake or a river. You may want to call a pilot weather briefer to make sure the sky will be clear that night.

Yeah, the thing is, I may have already started. I. . . am not sure. The whole thing is sort of convoluted and confusing and weird.


By the way, something that all women really like is a man who can play an instrument, and the more uncommon the instrument the better. I suggest an oboe or an accordion. That way, if you feel that it's going well, you can bust out your instrument and play her a song. Women love that.
I wish I could play an accordion! :(

Also, for the record, I am definitely female.


Other than that, use your best judgment for the rest of the date.

However, at the end, make sure that you kiss her goodnight.
Yeah. . . I totally did NOT kiss her goodbye. Some people have claimed that a kiss is one of the defining characteristics of a date. :(


Also, if she invites you in for a nightcap, she's not interested in a drink. In order for her to continue to have respect for you, it's very very important not to sleep with her on the first date. Even the second date is questionable.

At some point, you should serenade her under her window or balcony using your instrument. She'll love that. It's romantic and shows that you actually care.

If you have any more questions for me, never hesitate to ask.
I've already done the serenading thing, over the phone. She was thrilled :cool:

Yeah, here's some advice: Worry less about whether it was a date and more about whether she seemed interested in you. None of my dates have lead to relationships or sex, whereas spending a day together certainly has.

The maybe-sort-of-not-sure-if-it-was-a "date" WAS a day spent together. Which is why I'm not sure. If we'd just done dinner or seen movie or show or something, then I'd know. But we sort of just wandered around exploring and romping and being silly. Whether or not it was a date, it was totally amazingly awesome. And she had fun too :cool: I just am not sure if she's into me as more than a cool friend to spend the day with sometimes. Ya know?

I just am not sure if she's into me as more than a cool friend to spend the day with sometimes. Ya know?
Okay, next time find out. Try to kiss her, if she agrees, you're set, if not, you're a "good friend" and you can move on. And hurry, these things are actually time critical.

I'm saying this because I've been there, done that, got the T-Shirt. If you're not forthright with what you want, she'll be oblivious to it or at least do nothing about it, and then she'll start seeing you as a friend. When that happens, you only have two choices: stick around as the typical "nice guy" and be in it for a friendship and listening to her about her latest boyfriend troubles with some other guy*, or you move on and save everyone a whole lot of heartache. Especially yourself.

*Which, if you're happy with that, is fine. But it's clearly not what you want, and there is no reason for you to settle with it.

The maybe-sort-of-not-sure-if-it-was-a "date" WAS a day spent together. Which is why I'm not sure. If we'd just done dinner or seen movie or show or something, then I'd know. But we sort of just wandered around exploring and romping and being silly. Whether or not it was a date, it was totally amazingly awesome. And she had fun too :cool: I just am not sure if she's into me as more than a cool friend to spend the day with sometimes. Ya know?Yeah, unfortunately, it could mean that she's into you or that she thinks you're a cool friend to spend a day with sometimes. The only advice I can give here is going to be how a heterosexual male would come onto a girl, so it might not be very helpful, but I generally slowly try to probe for returned affections. Try to get yourself invited to her place to watch something on the couch/bed (or invite her to yours) and do a bit of careful cuddling.

Don't worry so much about whether it was a date, like I said, and more about if it meant something, that'll be enough confusion as it is. "Date" means different things to different people.

What are the defining characteristics of a date with someone?
Two people spend time together in a social setting for the purpose of evaluating each other as potential lovers. It is usually preceded by one asking the other, "Would you like to go out on a date with me?" or words to that effect.

Is dating too archaic a concept to even bother with any more?
Few people seem to remember or ever to have learned how to date. This is a shame, because it is very useful.

Are there rules for dates/dating that you follow/expect your companion to follow?
- The person who issued the invite pays for the date, unless mutually agreed otherwise.
- A thanks-for-a-lovely-time call should be made within hours of the end of the first date, unless the other person was a real horror-story.
- Coyness is for kids and suckers. If you want to see the person again, make a second date before the first one ends, or immediately thereafter.

What was the best date you ever went on?
I'm not a big one for fancy shows of romance and stuff like that. Dinner, drinks, chat, a movie or some other mild entertainment, are all I need. All my best dates have ended in bed -- because if I go to bed with the guy, it means I really enjoyed his company outside the bed, too. He made the right impression.

What was the worst?
I've been on some pretty bad dates, but the worst was a friend of a friend who pestered me for my number for weeks. Finally, I gave in and gave it to him, and he called right away and invited me out to dinner at a place we both knew and liked. An okay start. But through the whole meal, he said hardly a word. I kept asking him stuff about himself -- flattering stuff, to try to get him talking -- and all I got was one-word mutterings while he literally shoveled food into his mouth. It was like he hadn't eaten in days. His table manners were just disgusting. Then after dinner, it turned out he had no other plans. I couldn't even tell if he'd been hoping I would just bang him behind a bush by the roadside or something -- he was that unresponsive and uncommunicative.

So we were walking sort of to nowhere, and he was so unaware of me, that I started to lag behind him just to see if he would notice. And he didn't. He got a good 20 feet ahead of me without turning to see that I wasn't near him anymore.

And then I did something -- rather didn't do something -- that I still regret to this day. We got to an intersection near a bar where a friend of mine was working. He was just walking straight, and I thought, "I could hang a left and go get a beer at my friend's bar, and he probably wouldn't even know I was gone till he got to my house."

But I didn't do it. I just made him walk me home, said good night, and never spoke to him again. But I wish I had done the bar-ditch.

What is your ideal date?
I've never given that any thought. I don't know.

The maybe-sort-of-not-sure-if-it-was-a "date" WAS a day spent together. Which is why I'm not sure. If we'd just done dinner or seen movie or show or something, then I'd know. But we sort of just wandered around exploring and romping and being silly. Whether or not it was a date, it was totally amazingly awesome. And she had fun too :cool: I just am not sure if she's into me as more than a cool friend to spend the day with sometimes. Ya know?
Well, I'm a hetero woman, and I have to say, even I can't figure out whether a woman is into a guy or other woman she hangs out with or not. You'd think there would be some secret estrogen code that we'd all understand, but there isn't.

I've been in plenty of situations where I wasn't sure how the other person felt about me. I really, really hate that. It sucks. As I've gotten older, I tend to do one of two things -- I either ask the person outright if he wants to date me, because I'd rather just take the hit of rejection and get it over with. Or I find some excuse to give him my number or email, and then if he doesn't use it within the week, I write him off as not interested.

The maybe-sort-of-not-sure-if-it-was-a "date" WAS a day spent together. Which is why I'm not sure. If we'd just done dinner or seen movie or show or something, then I'd know. But we sort of just wandered around exploring and romping and being silly. Whether or not it was a date, it was totally amazingly awesome. And she had fun too :cool: I just am not sure if she's into me as more than a cool friend to spend the day with sometimes. Ya know?

Kiss the girl.
You don't make a move within a certain amount of time she will right you off as a friend. Believe it or not society conditions women to expect us to make the move.

I couldn't even tell if he'd been hoping I would just bang him behind a bush by the roadside or something -- he was that unresponsive and uncommunicative.

someone stop her quick she knows what men really want!

Kiss the girl.

your rather old fashioned aren't you? :p

You don't make a move within a certain amount of time she will right you off as a friend. Believe it or not society conditions women to expect us to make the move.

stoopid sociaty making me kiss girls :mad: