NationStates Jolt Archive

In my government sharehouse, I share with a teacher from the local public primary school. We have separate bathrooms, and I have a bathtub and shower in mine. She just has a shower cubicle. The other day, I walked in to find her soap in my bathtub. So I asked her about it. Her response was, "Oh, well I hope you don't mind, but I wash my feet in your bathtub because I splash water all over my bathroom because I don't have a tub."

HER FEET!!!

Suffice to say, I do in fact mind. She has tinea, which means that I may get it. Furthermore, the morning I found her soap was the first I have heard about her using my bathroom. She also, I have since discovered, washes her face in there.

I'm quite upset, but as this is my first experience living away from home, am unsure how to handle it. I don't want to create tension, but I don't particularly want her using my bathtub for her feet and face.

I also find it very strange that she would do this.

Anyone else had unique or strange experiences with housemates? And how does NSG propose I handle this?

Confront her now. Politely but firmly tell her that she has her own bathroom, and it is not okay for her to use yours. If you need to complain to someone higher up or finagle a lock, do it. Otherwise, it will only get worse.

Why don't you introduce her to your friend Ima Slapabitch.

OTOH it's your bathroom so your rules. Also I understand the objection to feet thing if she has tinea.

I think you're overreacting a bit about her washing her face though, may just be me.

OTOH it's your bathroom so your rules. Also I understand the objection to feet thing if she has tinea.

I think you're overreacting a bit about her washing her face though, may just be me.
I admit, I am an only child so I am used to my own space. It wouldn't bother me so much (the face thing) if she had asked first. I'm more upset at her using my bathroom without permission when she has her own.

Confront her now. Politely but firmly tell her that she has her own bathroom, and it is not okay for her to use yours. If you need to complain to someone higher up or finagle a lock, do it. Otherwise, it will only get worse.

That's my concern, that it will get worse, and she'll start taking over other things without permission. She's perfectly amiable, but not very considerate in some things. Whereas I ask permission before I use one of her tissues.

Just tell her you've got some form of a rare and highly contagious West African flesh eating disease on your foot and the bathtub is the only spot you can go barefoot without fear of contaminating the rest of the house. That should solve the problem and if your really lucky, you may just wind up getting the place to yourself.

Dead Bolt the bathroom. In fact, dead bolt your bedroom as well.

Spend some cash on a lock. Keep your bedroom and bathroom locked. Tell her you heard of a theft wave.

*To the tune of "Fiddler on the Roof"...*

TO LIE! TO LIE! LECHAYM!
LECHAYM, LEHAIM, TO LIE!

Alternatively, you can fill your tub with some not-too-noticeable irritant powder and then complain your feet have been itching and with sores - allowing her to assume she's catching something from you.

In my government sharehouse, I share with a teacher from the local public primary school. We have separate bathrooms, and I have a bathtub and shower in mine. She just has a shower cubicle. The other day, I walked in to find her soap in my bathtub. So I asked her about it. Her response was, "Oh, well I hope you don't mind, but I wash my feet in your bathtub because I splash water all over my bathroom because I don't have a tub."

HER FEET!!!
Feet aren't that bad!!
(although you people with foot phobias are going to make me RICH RICH I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Suffice to say, I do in fact mind. She has tinea, which means that I may get it. Furthermore, the morning I found her soap was the first I have heard about her using my bathroom. She also, I have since discovered, washes her face in there.
Have you told her that you don't want her washing her feet in there for some reason?

I'm quite upset, but as this is my first experience living away from home, am unsure how to handle it. I don't want to create tension, but I don't particularly want her using my bathtub for her feet and face.

I also find it very strange that she would do this.
Welcome to share houses. Shit happens, and somethimes for the sake of peaceful living you have to look past it. At other times all it takes is a diplomatic conversation.

Anyone else had unique or strange experiences with housemates? And how does NSG propose I handle this?
I had a housemate that didn't talk to me for 3 months.
At the moment I am in a share house with 2 guys that are more than twice my age. I am not enjoying it. (YAY! only 10 days till I move out!)

That's just a bit rude of her to use your bathroom I think, and with her having athlete's foot more than a little inconsiderate. You both have your own bathrooms, and if she is getting her bathroom wet by washing her feet she should either invest in a nice cushy rug to soak up the water like I do or get a foot tub, maybe you could make a gift of one for her; at the very least she should procure permission first.
You should confront her and discuss this but don't fly over the handle. H2's suggestions while funny are not the best way to make friends with your roomie; that's the kind of stuff you do after you make friends.

Oh... and I have no bad stories to tell about my roommates in college, they were all great guys I got on with fine. I do have issues with my mother's fiance, boyfriend, whatever he is... sometimes but nothing bad, we have different ways of approaching things.

Have a massive argument, so that you only communicate from henceforth with passive-aggressive notes. Then fantasize daily about stabbing her until dead and burying her in the back garden. Its what I've always done.

This 'owning' of bathrooms seems a bit odd to me unless they're en suite, but regardless, just explain the likelihood of infection from athlete's foot (maybe she's not aware of this).

This 'owning' of bathrooms seems a bit odd to me unless they're en suite, but regardless, just explain the likelihood of infection from athlete's foot (maybe she's not aware of this).

Well, there are 2 bathrooms and 2 of us, so we divided them up.

I just feel so strange that she would just use my bathroom without asking me.

And I have mentioned to her that tinea is contagious. She didn't really get what I was saying though.

Is it really significant to you that you have a tub, and if it isn't maybe you should consider just switching bathrooms.

That's just a bit rude of her to use your bathroom I think, and with her having athlete's foot more than a little inconsiderate. You both have your own bathrooms, and if she is getting her bathroom wet by washing her feet she should either invest in a nice cushy rug to soak up the water like I do or get a foot tub, maybe you could make a gift of one for her; at the very least she should procure permission first.
You should confront her and discuss this but don't fly over the handle. H2's suggestions while funny are not the best way to make friends with your roomie; that's the kind of stuff you do after you make friends.

You're my knight in shining armour, you know that?

You're my knight in shining armour, you know that?

I think there are a few rust spots here and there.

Is it really significant to you that you have a tub, and if it isn't maybe you should consider just switching bathrooms.
this.

tell her you think that y'all made a mistake when you chose bathrooms. then make it clear that you have a thing about keeping your bathroom to yourself.

I think there are a few rust spots here and there.

I'm sure that we can work those out. With a lot of time and effort ;)

Sounds like she just thinks she can walk all over you. not asking first sounds rude.

As a useful suggestion to your housemate, I recommend they get some Dead Sea Salt to bathe in, which kills 99% of all diseases, including maybe AIDS (although I haven't had that so I couldn't really say).

So you split the rent evenly I assume? And she got the shitty bathroom without a tub? And you're complaining that she occasionally uses your bathroom.

...I'm not really sympathetic to your plight. I split the rent evenly with my former roommate but he basically took up the entire apartment outside of my (smaller than his) bedroom and a small shelf in the bathroom medicine cabinet. It wasn't like I could have taken up any space in the rest of the apartment either because it was full of his crap. Action figures, books, furniture, you name it. I sort of felt like I was getting ripped off since I was paying the same to use less space.

But yeah, if you're dividing up bathrooms and your roommate gets one that doesn't have a tub and likes to take baths/wash feet in a more convenient way then really, you should let her use your tub occasionally because she got the short end of the bathroom stick and pays just as much to live there as you do.

Also, to prevent transmission of athlete's foot in the tub, just ask her to spray it down with some disinfectant when she's done if you're so worried. Further, there are treatments so she can like, get rid of it.

So you split the rent evenly I assume? And she got the shitty bathroom without a tub? And you're complaining that she occasionally uses your bathroom.

...I'm not really sympathetic to your plight. I split the rent evenly with my former roommate but he basically took up the entire apartment outside of my (smaller than his) bedroom and a small shelf in the bathroom medicine cabinet. It wasn't like I could have taken up any space in the rest of the apartment either because it was full of his crap. Action figures, books, furniture, you name it. I sort of felt like I was getting ripped off since I was paying the same to use less space.

But yeah, if you're dividing up bathrooms and your roommate gets one that doesn't have a tub and likes to take baths/wash feet in a more convenient way then really, you should let her use your tub occasionally because she got the short end of the bathroom stick and pays just as much to live there as you do.

Also, to prevent transmission of athlete's foot in the tub, just ask her to spray it down with some disinfectant when she's done if you're so worried. Further, there are treatments so she can like, get rid of it.


they don't split the rent. they are in a government share house.
They were assigned the rooms and bathrooms.
It is luck of the draw that got on the bat tube and the other the shower cube. Not I put my stuff here first therefor it is mine.

Well, there are 2 bathrooms and 2 of us, so we divided them up.

I just feel so strange that she would just use my bathroom without asking me.

And I have mentioned to her that tinea is contagious. She didn't really get what I was saying though.
So trade bathrooms. If she needs a tub, why not just give it to her?
they don't split the rent. they are in a government share house.
They were assigned the rooms and bathrooms.
It is luck of the draw that got on the bat tube and the other the shower cube. Not I put my stuff here first therefor it is mine.
actually, from what they said, they personally divided the bathrooms up, and they were not assigned to one. Not that that would even matter, as I'm sure they could still trade even if they had been assigned.

It's not yours if it isn't locked.
So just take it in the... foot.


However, it depends on how bad it is. Generally, the worse off they are, the more the people tend towards sharing things. So maybe it's logical for her.

While I'd say not asking first strikes me as discourteous, she may not feel the same and it really isn't that big of a deal. As you said, you aren't used to rooming with someone. However, you are living with someone, now, and part of that is coming to compromise in a mature and civil manner. As much fun as passive aggressive quips and pranks might be, your best bet is to tell her you want to switch bathrooms simply because you don't want to catch her foot disease and that's that.

The biggest hurdle to get over when living with people is learning that you'll need to simply suffer through each others' quirks. People have different habits and customs.

Tell her to join the leg up program and use her sink. It's not hard, in fact, when my husband plays "guess that smell" and determines its my feet, I clean my feet using the sink. :D

Just tell her that you aren't comfortable with it. Currently living in a place with 3 women. One hasn't spoken to another of them for nearly 3 months now. I tell you, it gets boring there and I spend most of my time at my friends place or the bar.

I miss my old flat where we all got on together and there were 10 of us there! However I'm moving in September to a new house with 5 of my best guy mates. I've spent most of my time there this year and suffice to sy from day 1 it will not be boring.

So you split the rent evenly I assume? And she got the shitty bathroom without a tub? And you're complaining that she occasionally uses your bathroom.

No, our rent is subsidised by the state government as an incentive to stay out here in rural and remote areas. So we pay the same. Truthfully, I just find it weird that after we agreed on the bathroom breakup, she didn't ask me if it was okay. I ask before I borrow one of her tissues for crying out loud.

...I'm not really sympathetic to your plight. I split the rent evenly with my former roommate but he basically took up the entire apartment outside of my (smaller than his) bedroom and a small shelf in the bathroom medicine cabinet. It wasn't like I could have taken up any space in the rest of the apartment either because it was full of his crap. Action figures, books, furniture, you name it. I sort of felt like I was getting ripped off since I was paying the same to use less space.

Yeah, and she uses the spare bedroom as her office, as well as taking over space in my bookcase (again without asking), and uses the wardrobe in the spare bedroom because her clothes won't fit in her own wardrobe and chest of drawers (government furniture - I don't have a chest of drawers either). So really, I think sometimes that I'm getting the raw end of the space deal.

But yeah, if you're dividing up bathrooms and your roommate gets one that doesn't have a tub and likes to take baths/wash feet in a more convenient way then really, you should let her use your tub occasionally because she got the short end of the bathroom stick and pays just as much to live there as you do.

I would be happy to let her wash her face in there, if she had simply asked me first. It was a shock to walk in and find her there one morning when I needed to use my bathroom. She chose her bathroom because she doesn't like baths and didn't want to clean something she didn't use.

Also, to prevent transmission of athlete's foot in the tub, just ask her to spray it down with some disinfectant when she's done if you're so worried. Further, there are treatments so she can like, get rid of it.

Yes I realise this as I used to suffer in primary school from this affliction. I mentioned that she might like to go to the chemist or the doctor about it, and she was not particularly interested. I also suggested various products she could try.

My main issue is that she hasn't asked if it's okay with me to use my space. I really don't have a problem with her using my stuff (we use all my pots and pans, TV, etc.). But it would be nice if she asked first. And I think it's a little gross that she would use my bathroom to wash her feet when she has tinea. I mean, I don't use her shower cubicle to rinse out my nose, even though it's more convenient for me to do that.

actually, from what they said, they personally divided the bathrooms up, and they were not assigned to one. Not that that would even matter, as I'm sure they could still trade even if they had been assigned.

That's right. She took the one without a tub because she doesn't like baths and didn't want to clean the larger bathroom since, in her words, "I won't use it fully." So I took the bathroom with the tub, since I like baths, and was happy to clean it. Now she uses my tub, but has not offered to clean it and has not asked. My issue is mainly that I think it rude that she didn't ask. And of course, I am concerned about getting tinea, and she seems not to grasp that it is in fact a contagious thing, and she needs to get rid of it if she wants to use my bathroom.

No, our rent is subsidised by the state government as an incentive to stay out here in rural and remote areas. So we pay the same. Truthfully, I just find it weird that after we agreed on the bathroom breakup, she didn't ask me if it was okay. I ask before I borrow one of her tissues for crying out loud.



Yeah, and she uses the spare bedroom as her office, as well as taking over space in my bookcase (again without asking), and uses the wardrobe in the spare bedroom because her clothes won't fit in her own wardrobe and chest of drawers (government furniture - I don't have a chest of drawers either). So really, I think sometimes that I'm getting the raw end of the space deal.



I would be happy to let her wash her face in there, if she had simply asked me first. It was a shock to walk in and find her there one morning when I needed to use my bathroom. She chose her bathroom because she doesn't like baths and didn't want to clean something she didn't use.



Yes I realise this as I used to suffer in primary school from this affliction. I mentioned that she might like to go to the chemist or the doctor about it, and she was not particularly interested. I also suggested various products she could try.

My main issue is that she hasn't asked if it's okay with me to use my space. I really don't have a problem with her using my stuff (we use all my pots and pans, TV, etc.). But it would be nice if she asked first. And I think it's a little gross that she would use my bathroom to wash her feet when she has tinea. I mean, I don't use her shower cubicle to rinse out my nose, even though it's more convenient for me to do that.

Oh, well, in that case, tell your roommate when she does things that bother you including using your bathroom. You can probably also tell her that if she really likes your bathroom so much she can have it and you'll take hers. Since she clearly does like to use the tub, she should have to clean it.

Thanks, NSG for your sage and worldly advice. I turned to you because, as I said, I've never lived away from home before and didn't really know how to handle this situation.

I spoke to my housemate this morning, and just mentioned that if she is washing her feet, whilst she has tinea could she please disinfect the tub. And I also let her know that the option to switch bathrooms was there. She said she was happy with her own, but would make sure to disinfect my tub. I also said that in future, I would appreciate being asked before she uses my space, as I extended this courtesy to her, and she said she would endeavour to do this in future.

Thanks, NSG for your sage and worldly advice. I turned to you because, as I said, I've never lived away from home before and didn't really know how to handle this situation.

I spoke to my housemate this morning, and just mentioned that if she is washing her feet, whilst she has tinea could she please disinfect the tub. And I also let her know that the option to switch bathrooms was there. She said she was happy with her own, but would make sure to disinfect my tub. I also said that in future, I would appreciate being asked before she uses my space, as I extended this courtesy to her, and she said she would endeavour to do this in future.

Well, colour me surprised, NSG gave advice that actually worked. Excuse me while I get my heater, I hear hell could use it these days.

(oh, and congrats on sorting it out reasonably)

The Bible will provide the answers that you need.

Why don't you introduce her to your friend Ima Slapabitch.This made me laugh way more than it should have.

Just shit a few times in your bathtub.

Why is the bathtub, in a sharehouse, your bathtub?

The Bible will provide the answers that you need. I didn't know the Bible provided detail on sharehouse etiquette. I don't generally use fairytales for advice. Otherwise I'd be wearing my little red cape all day long in the hopes of a big bad wolf coming to eat me.

This made me laugh way more than it should have.

Me too!

Just shit a few times in your bathtub.

Why is the bathtub, in a sharehouse, your bathtub?

because they divided it up based on what they want to clean.
See the room mate wants to get the benefits of the bath tube with out having to clean the bath tube. this is wrong.
she is shifting the burden of cleaning after her mess to someone else and rising spreading a Disease to them.

I didn't know the Bible provided detail on sharehouse etiquette. I don't generally use fairytales for advice. Otherwise I'd be wearing my little red cape all day long in the hopes of a big bad wolf coming to eat me.




It says turn the other cheek which means leave your room open for her to sleep there when she wants.

It says turn the other cheek which means leave your room open for her to sleep there when she wants.

Just which cheek are you turning?

If it's the proper cheek, it could get properly cheeky.

The Bible will provide the answers that you need.
I missed the part about bathtubs, somehow.

It says turn the other cheek which means leave your room open for her to sleep there when she wants.
Turn the other cheek?
You mean, moon her?

Just which cheek are you turning?

If it's the proper cheek, it could get properly cheeky.

I missed the part about bathtubs, somehow.


Turn the other cheek?
You mean, moon her?

somewhere between those interprations should be the christian answer.

In my government sharehouse, I share with a teacher from the local public primary school...

I'm intrigued about the this part of your OP. I've never heard of the Australian or state governments providing share houses. What state are you in? What are the circumstances? It's none of my business but I am curioius.

I'm intrigued about the this part of your OP. I've never heard of the Australian or state governments providing share houses. What state are you in? What are the circumstances? It's none of my business but I am curioius.

Education Queensland provides department accommodation to teachers in rural and remote areas at subsidised rates as an incentive for them to go to these communities to teach. You usually have to share, but you get a 3 bedroom house, with stove, washing machine, 2 bathrooms, and some other pieces of furniture. In the indigenous communities, you can only take government furniture.

Education Queensland provides department accommodation to teachers in rural and remote areas at subsidised rates as an incentive for them to go to these communities to teach. You usually have to share, but you get a 3 bedroom house, with stove, washing machine, 2 bathrooms, and some other pieces of furniture. In the indigenous communities, you can only take government furniture.

Thanks. I hope your job is as interesting and rewarding as it sounds like it could be.

Have a massive argument, so that you only communicate from henceforth with passive-aggressive notes. Then fantasize daily about stabbing her until dead and burying her in the back garden. Its what I've always done.

^this. It's the way I adapted to all my roommates. Also, being a generally passive aggressive bitch I'd like to suggest buying her a washtub and putting it in her shower stall with a note "I think this would be a good way to wash your feet in your own goddamn bathroom".

I'm sure that we can work those out. With a lot of time and effort ;)

Sounds exciting, when can we start?

I didn't know the Bible provided detail on sharehouse etiquette. I don't generally use fairytales for advice. Otherwise I'd be wearing my little red cape all day long in the hopes of a big bad wolf coming to eat me.


I could get a wolf costume, getting to Australia is the problem

Sounds exciting, when can we start?

Whenever you like ;)



I could get a wolf costume, getting to Australia is the problem

I'm sure you could hitch a ride with the other boat people. It's really the not dying part you have to perfect.

I had a housemate that didn't talk to me for 3 months.
At the moment I am in a share house with 2 guys that are more than twice my age. I am not enjoying it. (YAY! only 10 days till I move out!)

How come you moved in there in the first place Lapse?

Have a massive argument, so that you only communicate from henceforth with passive-aggressive notes. Then fantasize daily about stabbing her until dead and burying her in the back garden. Its what I've always done.

Except for that one time when you did more than fantasize.

P.S Toronto police want a word with you.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20081030.woshawa1031/BNStory/National/home/

I miss my old flat where we all got on together and there were 10 of us there! However I'm moving in September to a new house with 5 of my best guy mates. I've spent most of my time there this year and suffice to sy from day 1 it will not be boring.

Do I see this being a party house?

They are very very good currently live in one myself, they can be bad but the good times outweigh the bad.

Upon further deliberation, I think you and your roommate should settle this like women! That means with mud, and bathing suits, and no rules....

well seeing as you a have bath tube perhaps some water boarding is in order.

well seeing as you a have bath tube perhaps some water boarding is in order.

The ol' Shawn Hannedy Treatment?

The ol' Shawn Hannedy Treatment?

If it is not torture then it is perfectly Fine to use to resolve your domestic conflicts.

Well, if it makes you feel any better about your roommate, MY roommate literally pissed on the floor last night. Fucking drunkies....I've been drunk enough to run away from cops but in a direction that brings me directly towards the cops and then trip on my own feet, fall on a curb and wake up the next morning pissing blood without any recollection of why....But I have never urinated inside of an apartment, in my own pants or generally in places you would not expect one to urinate (I did piss down a stairwell, once...but that's still a far cry from inside the living room of your own apartment). I simply do not understand that level of drunkenness.
well seeing as you a have bath tube perhaps some water boarding is in order.

Why do you keep saying bath tube? o.O

Except for that one time when you did more than fantasize.

P.S Toronto police want a word with you.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20081030.woshawa1031/BNStory/National/home/

No comment.

How come you moved in there in the first place Lapse?

it is through one of those dodgy mobs that rents out rooms individually. When I looked at the house, there wasn;t actually anyone else in there, and they neglected to mention that old people were moving in until after I had signed the lease. SO, my advice to you all is avoid dodgy room rental mobs.

Upon further deliberation, I think you and your roommate should settle this like women! That means with mud, and bathing suits, and no rules....

Well, eventually woman A will be getting washed and end up fondling herself in front of the mirror (not just in the usual shampoo/showergel way). Just as she expresses the desire for penis (or penii) woman B will walk in, and the merriment and 'bonding' commence. Were this Germany, it would be best to lock the door to prevent suprise visits of persons of reduced stature wearing medical rubber gloves......

it is through one of those dodgy mobs that rents out rooms individually. When I looked at the house, there wasn;t actually anyone else in there, and they neglected to mention that old people were moving in until after I had signed the lease. SO, my advice to you all is avoid dodgy room rental mobs.

Cheers man will do.

Am I going to get an invite to your next housewarming party?

are you going to be in Brisbane in 2 weeks time :P

Actually, I will have to see about having a housewarming party. I have to figure out if it is really worth the effort :P

are you going to be in Brisbane in 2 weeks time :P

Actually, I will have to see about having a housewarming party. I have to figure out if it is really worth the effort :P

Haha, well if I am I will let you know. :tongue:

you should :)

In my government sharehouse, I share with a teacher from the local public primary school. We have separate bathrooms, and I have a bathtub and shower in mine. She just has a shower cubicle. The other day, I walked in to find her soap in my bathtub. So I asked her about it. Her response was, "Oh, well I hope you don't mind, but I wash my feet in your bathtub because I splash water all over my bathroom because I don't have a tub."

HER FEET!!!

Suffice to say, I do in fact mind. She has tinea, which means that I may get it. Furthermore, the morning I found her soap was the first I have heard about her using my bathroom. She also, I have since discovered, washes her face in there.

I'm quite upset, but as this is my first experience living away from home, am unsure how to handle it. I don't want to create tension, but I don't particularly want her using my bathtub for her feet and face.

I also find it very strange that she would do this.

Anyone else had unique or strange experiences with housemates? And how does NSG propose I handle this?

Meh, I'd let her use my bathroom, I mean one day you may be in a rush to get out and not have time for a bath and the use of her shower would be great.

Also, it's not the worst thing a housemate can do, now if she shat in your bed!!!!

Meh, I'd let her use my bathroom, I mean one day you may be in a rush to get out and not have time for a bath and the use of her shower would be great.

Also, it's not the worst thing a housemate can do, now if she shat in your bed!!!!
hmm, was think of what I should bestow upon my housemates the day that I hand my keys in...