NationStates Jolt Archive

During a period of my life when I considered suicide as a way out of the misery of day to day life alone and poor. I thought of how I was going to die. What happens after. After so many random thoughts I thought about Dreams.

Dreams have always been an escape from my misery, and so I thought... If you could live in your own personal heaven. A dream in a coma where you were the god, would you enter the coma to leave misery and enter your own little world.

I know it might be disturbing that my thoughts are like this. But what say you NSG? If your life was full of misery, would you want to be in your own dreamland?

Read This First (http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/)

I would love to live in a world where I was eternally successful through the process of hard work.

I would love to enjoy every moment of hard work.

I wish I knew I had an Afrotc scholarship, got my 4 years of collage done, 2 years of training, and was on my way to becoming an a-10 or a/c-130 or f-35 or f-22 or b-52 or whatever plane that is fun to fly up in the wild blue yonder.

Been there, done that.

I think we've all been there. You just keep on going and one morning you wake up and find out that reality has improved and dreams just don't have enough going for them to keep you interested.

The truth is that we all live in our own little worlds, the stability and proximity to reality of those worlds depends on our willingness to share them, it's how we learn and progress.

I'm wondering as to beneficial effects of the Internet, there's a reason why psychoanalysts sit behind a patient, not seeing the person helps internalise the discussion and draw out deeper truths, and likewise I wonder whether the anonymity of the Internet means people can say things they might not be able to express, or get across, to those nearer to them.

Long ago, when we lived together in greater numbers, it was hard to conceal the truth but nuclear families and city apartment dwelling allows a greater number of people to be different in public than they are in private, less willing to admit to habits we're unsure are acceptable, the Internet provides an outlet for that.

I doubt we appreciate the enormous cultural impact the Internet is having, and will continue to have, I genuinely think it's almost an evolutionary step forward if one extends the meaning of evolution enough. It's another world.

Regardless of personal situations, we live in incredible times, the real world isn't a bad place to be given you're in a developed country.

If nothing else, amuse yourself - everything's amazing right now and nobody's happy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoGYx35ypus)

but my dreams always suck and pick at deep rooted emotional issues...am I the only one :confused:

I suggest a change of pace maybe just jack it all in and have a great big adventure

Any dream I remember or experience is always absolute hell. No, I would not like to be stuck experiencing them. The problem is so severe (in addition to a personal want to be doing something more productive) as to cause me to only sleep between 14 and 40 hours a week regularly. I just go till I am in the brink of physical exhaustion.

The 8 hours of a day of dreams a day works well enough already.

Reality is a welcome break sometimes..... Just last night I was in a quandary about whether I wanted ketchup or mayonnaise with the space marines I had hidden in a greenhouse, after formula 1 racing through a Charlie Brown museum on a sofa.

The 8 hours of a day of dreams a day works well enough already.

Reality is a welcome break sometimes..... Just last night I was in a quandary about whether I wanted ketchup or mayonnaise with the space marines I had hidden in a greenhouse, after formula 1 racing through a Charlie Brown museum on a sofa.
The absurdity of your dreams astounds.:salute:

Mine are generally much more logical and immediately relevant to what is going on, or predictions of future events I have to deal with or choices I have to make

The absurdity of your dreams astounds.:salute:

Mine are generally much more logical and immediately relevant to what is going on, or predictions of future events I have to deal with or choices I have to make

Thanks... er, I think.

All perfectly logical for me though..... I can trace the origins back to things I did the previous day, in a tangential fashion (except Charlie Brown, that was a bit left field)

I rarely have dreams about 'important things' that are stressing me out though. So sleep is normally a pleasing diversion from any such stress.

Look at the lawman beating up the wrong guy, oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know, he's in the bestselling show...

No. being stuck in a dream coma even when I was ostensibly god within it, would be pretty bad for me. I dislike dreams intensely.

During a period of my life when I considered suicide as a way out of the misery of day to day life alone and poor. I thought of how I was going to die. What happens after. After so many random thoughts I thought about Dreams.

Dreams have always been an escape from my misery, and so I thought... If you could live in your own personal heaven. A dream in a coma where you were the god, would you enter the coma to leave misery and enter your own little world.

I know it might be disturbing that my thoughts are like this. But what say you NSG? If your life was full of misery, would you want to be in your own dreamland?

I'm autistic, my own little world is about 3 seconds away no matter what I'm doing.

With blackjack and hookers. :)

With blackjack and hookers. :)

You know what, forget the blackjack!

A "dreamland" is possible. We can exert a near God-like influence upon our environment, with enough will to do so. I will not settle for the world the way it is: I want to reshape it as much I can--into what we have always wanted it to be.

Everyday that passes, the real world grows a little more remote, seems a little less necessary, and feels a little stranger when I have to interact with it.

That said, most people who retreat into worlds of fantasy don't end up in comas, they end up shirtless and dirty, wandering around the streets of a major metropolitan area and carrying a giant bag of cans.

See "What Dreams May Come (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120889/)".

While I'd like it, I suppose, I'd still want to be back in the real world. It only lasts a little bit, so why not get the most out of it while you can, and not end it early?

The truth is that we all live in our own little worlds, the stability and proximity to reality of those worlds depends on our willingness to share them, it's how we learn and progress.

I'm wondering as to beneficial effects of the Internet, there's a reason why psychoanalysts sit behind a patient, not seeing the person helps internalise the discussion and draw out deeper truths, and likewise I wonder whether the anonymity of the Internet means people can say things they might not be able to express, or get across, to those nearer to them.

Long ago, when we lived together in greater numbers, it was hard to conceal the truth but nuclear families and city apartment dwelling allows a greater number of people to be different in public than they are in private, less willing to admit to habits we're unsure are acceptable, the Internet provides an outlet for that.

I doubt we appreciate the enormous cultural impact the Internet is having, and will continue to have, I genuinely think it's almost an evolutionary step forward if one extends the meaning of evolution enough. It's another world.

Regardless of personal situations, we live in incredible times, the real world isn't a bad place to be given you're in a developed country.

If nothing else, amuse yourself - everything's amazing right now and nobody's happy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoGYx35ypus)



That was awesome video. Very good.

With regard to the question would I live in a Fantasy Land?

I think many of already do. Some via drugs, some via alcohol, some via DVDs and TV, some via video games. Most of us have already moved in and even have an address. The Internet and place like NSG.

We are already here. Welcome to the Information Age where you can leave all your pesky world concerns at the door. Tune in, turn on, and drop out.

See "What Dreams May Come (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120889/)".

Thanks for the link I will have to check that one out. Sounds pretty good.

coughemocough

depends, if I didnt know I was in a dream world, im not sure why I would care...

If I knew, then im gonna have to say no, so I dont end up like this guy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_minor_characters_in_the_Matrix_series#Cypher

depends, if I didnt know I was in a dream world, im not sure why I would care...

If I knew, then im gonna have to say no, so I dont end up like this guy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_minor_characters_in_the_Matrix_series#Cypher

Ignorance is bliss.

You know what, forget the blackjack!

Ahh but the blackjack plays an important part. It's for those in between times or I call it "recharging". :tongue:

Usually when I have dreams there quite terrifying. Lots of blood and violence.

Once I was fighting the folks from "The Hills Have Eyes" in a K-Mart. They kept coming and coming.. It wasnt until I broke out the pickaxe from the garden section (Do they even have one?) that the fight was equalized.

Interesting though

With blackjack and hookers. :)
Viva Las Vegas? (http://www.visitlasvegas.com/vegas/index.jsp)

Everyday that passes, the real world grows a little more remote, seems a little less necessary, and feels a little stranger when I have to interact with it.

That said, most people who retreat into worlds of fantasy don't end up in comas, they end up shirtless and dirty, wandering around the streets of a major metropolitan area and carrying a giant bag of cans.

Or....















http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/marvel_dc/images/thumb/4/4c/Ventriloquist_I_1.jpg/200px-Ventriloquist_I_1.jpg

my little dreamworld when i was depressed at university was called NSG. it was a place where i could talk with and have friends (and on IM, too), be confident, didn't feel the paranoia or social anxiety, a place where i felt i was liked, and where i had a degree of control (unlike RL social situations back then)

its why i'm still here, even when most of the people and my friends from back then have left


that, or the fantasy world of Star Trek. i also liked watching the Osbournes - it felt like i had a family again.
edit: also, lots of drugs. probably didn't help much tbh >.>

my little dreamworld when i was depressed at university was called NSG. it was a place where i could talk with and have friends (and on IM, too), be confident, didn't feel the paranoia or social anxiety, a place where i felt i was liked, and where i had a degree of control (unlike RL social situations back then)

its why i'm still here, even when most of the people and my friends from back then have left
Heh. Very well put.

Heh. Very well put.

thank you :) i also met my girlfriend (now of 4 years) on here. another reason for me to be grateful for NSG :P

Isn't this the plot of The Matrix ?

Yes, I think I would willingly enter a coma if it was to escape from the pain.

I absolutely would, assuming it wasn't just running off my own imagination. Trying to fool my own brain into thinking that it doesn't know what's about to happen... that would be frustrating.

Yes, I think I would willingly enter a coma if it was to escape from the pain.

Not I. Pain is a tremendous part of life--it gives us meaning--the struggle. The massive possibility of pain and failure is what gives us the "will to power". Pain makes pleasure all the more succulent. Agony is the pen that draws our outlines, and thus defines greatness.

Life is too close to an illusion as it is; I could not accept more hallucination.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPAesqaJ9tc

Not I. Pain is a tremendous part of life--it gives us meaning--the struggle. The massive possibility of pain and failure are what give us the "will to power". Pain makes pleasure all the more succulent. Agony is the pen that draws our outlines, and thus defines greatness.

Life is too close to an illusion as it is; I could not accept more hallucination.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPAesqaJ9tc

To me, sometimes or most of the time, pain, agony and pleasure go hand in hand.

Of course, there are times, many times when I wish I were to go to sleep and I don't wake up. Hence, a coma feels like a good thing to do. For me, that is. I like running, you see, running as fast as I can so that my body becomes nothing I can win this race against both Time and the Wind.

There are times that I look at the sea with a hunger of ages, wishing it would claim me and send me down, down under the surge, to see dolphins make me a bed of corals and pearl. To die sounds good, too good to me to not want it. Life is not an illusion, shinjitsu to unmei janai, Parkus-sama, life is too much work.

To me, sometimes or most of the time, pain, agony and pleasure go hand in hand.

Without agony, there is no pleasure, only complacent stagnation.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ggPWuG_DH2s/SaJahO9k5gI/AAAAAAAAA9A/8yypPBxMRCI/s320/fat_walle.jpg

Of course, there are times, many times when I wish I were to go to sleep and I don't wake up. Hence, a coma feels like a good thing to do. For me, that is. I like running, you see, running as fast as I can so that my body becomes nothing I can win this race against both Time and the Wind.

Yes; I once wanted to die. Until I found meaning.

There are times that I look at the sea with a hunger of ages, wishing it would claim me and send me down, down under the surge, to see dolphins make me a bed of corals and pearl. To die sounds good, too good to me to not want it.

Yes--I was about to do something drastic some time ago. A moderator sent some comforting e-mails to me. A little later I had an epiphany: That there is no love. I was relieved--I now could abandon the search for the unattainable, and find a true goal.

Life is not an illusion,

Shifting, buzzing, bits of matter reflecting light, given some name by the galvanisms we call "consciousness".

shinjitsu to unmei janai, Parkus-sama, life is too much work.

Until one finds the right kind of work, at which time life becomes almost addicting.

Pain is a tremendous part of life--it gives us meaning--the struggle. The massive possibility of pain and failure are what give us the "will to power". Pain makes pleasure all the more succulent. Agony is the pen that draws our outlines, and thus defines greatness.


May I sig this?

May I sig this?

Certainly--though I had to edit it, singular and plural stuff.

Until one finds the right kind of work, at which time life becomes almost addicting.
As soon as you said that, all I could imagine is Life Annoymous. "Hi, my name is Paul, and I'm alive."
"Hi Paul!":tongue:

Certainly.

Thank you.

I just realized how contrary I am. On another thread I was pointing out how much God is to blame because of our suffering, and here I am defending pain as vital to the human spirit. :tongue:

I bested myself again.

I just realized how contrary I am. On another thread I was pointing out how much God is to blame because of our suffering, and here I am defending pain as vital to the human spirit. :tongue:

I bested myself again.

You're human. Do not forget that.

I just realized how contrary I am. On another thread I was pointing out how much God is to blame because of our suffering, and here I am defending pain as vital to the human spirit. :tongue:

I bested myself again.

So, you're God creates the Human Spirit!:tongue:

You're human. Do not forget that.

Please, do not remind me. I obviously pervert argument.

Please, do not remind me. I obviously pervert argument.

Parkus, we cannot, unfortunately, be anything but what we are.

We are silent fortresses built to last... yearning to end it, but sturdy despite it all.

So, you're God creates the Human Spirit!:tongue:

Yes, I suppose. Sort of like Machiavelli' idea of God. According to him, God gives us free-will and suffering so that we may gain "glory". In fact, what is more glorious than the human spirit?

In fact, what is more glorious than the human spirit?

Human sacrifice.

Parkus, we cannot, unfortunately, be anything but what we are.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLuW-GBaJ8k

We are silent fortresses built to last... yearning to end it, but sturdy despite it all.

Yes, dreadfully depressing. The sad thing is that we look for consolation in the feelings of another human.

Human sacrifice.

http://i149.photobucket.com/albums/s49/Chicanindio/Azteca/AztecsHumanSacrifice.gif?t=1239500663

¿Por qué?

Yes, dreadfully depressing. The sad thing is that we look for consolation in the feelings of another human.

What happened to you that was so bad, your pain and frustration overflows into your words like scalding water? Who cut into your heart so deep that it turned into a frozen man?

¿Por qué?

To give, and keep giving until there's no more of you is majestic. It's more than that, it's the consummation of adoration, and yes... of love.

What happened to you that was so bad, your pain and frustration overflows into your words like scalding water? Who cut into your heart so deep that it turned into a frozen man?

Someone who sees things as I do now. I am actually quite happy, these days. I am beyond happy: I will follow myself to the very invigoration of me, and history itself.

To give, and keep giving until there's no more of you is majestic. It's more than that, it's the consummation of adoration, and yes... of love.

It is the greatest idea(l) of all time--it is even the root of our most powerful religion.

But there are actions which are greater, though less noble.

Someone who sees things as I do now. I am actually quite happy, these days. I am beyond happy: I will follow myself to the very invigoration of me, and history itself.

You... hurt me... and I don't know why.

You... hurt me... and I don't know why.

You are not pleased? I was once self-destructive, now I know jubilation

It is the greatest idea(l) of all time--it is even the root of our most powerful religion.

But there are actions which are greater, though less noble.

Ah yes... Noblesse Oblige. You epitomize that.

But the human sacrifice I speak of has nothing to do with a god that's been blind for eons. I speak of the sacrifice I am willing to offer for the ones I love.

You are not pleased? I was once self-destructive, now I know jubilation

There's only one person I worry pleasing.

This discussion is not about being pleased. You seem happy and I stepped into territory that is not mine to thread. I am backing away from this tidal wave of your history. I don't want this.

Ah yes... Noblesse Oblige. You epitomize that.

Not enitrely. There are who those who believe greatness is "can" and "cannot", and that the "cans" owe something to all. I tell you now, the two types are "will not" and "will"

But the human sacrifice I speak of has nothing to do with a god that's been blind for eons. I speak of the sacrifice I am willing to offer for the ones I love.

Poetry, religion, and philosophy go hand-in-hand. A secular idealist varies little from a devout lover of Christ. Sacrifice is magnificent in concept, but serves little practical purpose. Still, it is best to have a purpose, even if it is but an ideal.

There's only one person I worry pleasing.

This discussion is not about being pleased. You seem happy and I stepped into territory that is not mine to thread. I am backing away from this tidal wave of your history. I don't want this.

Okay!

http://www.happierhomes.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/webassets/320px-SMirC-thumbsup.jpg

Okay!

http://www.happierhomes.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/webassets/320px-SMirC-thumbsup.jpg

You're neither alive nor dead...

You're neither alive nor dead...

Nah, he's just insane, like the rest of us. The truly great thinkers are always insane.

You're neither alive nor dead...

Nonsense; I can dance on both legs.

http://www.elyriaanimalhospital.com/images/AnimatedGifs/Dancing-Cat-Animated.gif

Nonsense; I can dance on both legs.

http://www.elyriaanimalhospital.com/images/AnimatedGifs/Dancing-Cat-Animated.gif

This only supports my theory that the only way that Great Thinkers get to be known as such is through their insanity.

Nah, he's just insane, like the rest of us. The truly great thinkers are always insane.

That is the damned largest chuck of truth you have ever posted, CM, ;) and you post a lot of it.

That is the damned largest chuck of truth you have ever posted, CM, ;) and you post a lot of it.

Thanks for the compliment, I do my best.:D

Thanks for the compliment, I do my best.:D

The beautiful way you handle veracity has convinced me that liars are not the only ones who can have fun on this planet.

See "What Dreams May Come (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120889/)".

Or Vanilla Sky

Ahh but the blackjack plays an important part. It's for those in between times or I call it "recharging". :tongue:

Just toss in more foreplay.

Didn't you get the reference?

Vanilla sky brings me to the idea that, we might never have it exactly as we want. A dreamland turns into a nightmare, so, that does make you think. Do I really want to be in my own heaven? Or do I want to experience life and overcome the gritty realization that pain leads to strength?

Vanilla sky brings me to the idea that, we might never have it exactly as we want. A dreamland turns into a nightmare, so, that does make you think. Do I really want to be in my own heaven? Or do I want to experience life and overcome the gritty realization that pain leads to strength?

Pain does lead to strength and builds character. However some feel they have too much character development in too short a period of time. Everything is about proportions. If it were possible to live in say World of Warcraft, just for argument, 24 hours a day 7 days a week. I think there are people who would choose that. Some say work is just the funding mechanism for your games addiction or maybe better entertainment addiction.

I think also might have been why there were so many wars in the past. It was something to do. With plays and theater it very hard to change the channel. I suppose you could heckle but that could also get you kicked out.

escape is natural and healthy.
we evolved with minds suited to nature's irrepressible diversity.
repressing our natural and healthy imagination (that is the only observable thing that makes us uniquely of life forms on our planet, human) is what sends people over the brainbow into cloudcookooland.