NationStates Jolt Archive

"Sounds good!"

ugh.... Every time I hear that in a professional environment I want to puncture my eardrums with an ice pick.

In the movie Office Space (which is genius for this kind of thing) this is one of the many little details that gets lampooned. The one that comes to mind to me is when Lumbergh goes to talk to Peter and the cubicle walls are on the floor. After their brief conversation in which Lumbergh discovers Peter had yet another meeting with the Bobs, and that he wasn't invited to it, tries to recover a little face by saying, as Peter walks away, "Sounds good, Peter..."

...ever notice most of the time at work when people say that, as in this case, it's so generic that it doesn't really mean anything? What sounds good? I mean, if Peter had presented a pan or something that could actually be evaluated as sounding good that would be one thing. Much better to say something like "okie dokie" which, while equally meaningless, at least has no pretense of meaning.

Of course, there's about a dozen different little such sayings from Lumbergh but that's my "favorite."

I know there was a thread like this recently but I'm focusing specifically on ones we hear in the office/professional environment... I'm also interested in hearing ones from other countries where euphemisms and figures of speech tend to be different.

"Sounds good!"

ugh.... Every time I hear that in a professional environment I want to puncture my eardrums with an ice pick.

In the movie Office Space (which is genius for this kind of thing) this is one of the many little details that gets lampooned. The one that comes to mind to me is when Lumbergh goes to talk to Peter and the cubicle walls are on the floor. After their brief conversation in which Lumbergh discovers Peter had yet another meeting with the Bobs, and that he wasn't invited to it, tries to recover a little face by saying, as Peter walks away, "Sounds good, Peter..."

Geez, sounds like SOMEBODY has a case of the Mondays!

Best Practices is the one that does it for me. I want to shove a corkscrew into my ear whenever I hear it.

In the office where I worked, the pet term was "we need you to be team players" - this from managers who did everything possible to turn workers against each other and invest the workplace with a spirit of divisiveness, hostility and suspicion.

Geez, sounds like SOMEBODY has a case of the Mondays!

Strangely, that one doesn't bug me. Maybe since nobody uses it.... hmmmm maybe I should start. hehe

In the office where I worked, the pet term was "we need you to be team players" - this from managers who did everything possible to turn workers against each other and invest the workplace with a spirit of divisiveness, hostility and suspicion.

I once saw a list of stupid phrases commonly used by managers and that one was on it. Another one was "make it happen."

I've never worked in a typical office environment, so I wouldn't know, but my personal favourite, in my case, are guys who say "Hooah!" to everything an Officer says. It bugs the hell out of me.

In the office where I worked, the pet term was "we need you to be team players" - this from managers who did everything possible to turn workers against each other and invest the workplace with a spirit of divisiveness, hostility and suspicion.

I use that all the time as a joke, to single out people who don't do what I want :tongue:

Doesn't necessarily have to have anything to do with what we're doing...it could be a friend not buying the drinks or whatever. But its still funny :D

The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little something extra....

=)

The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little something extra....

=)

oh man that's awful...

"Just to give you a heads up" .....wtf?!

"Think outside of the box" ....... I'd like to bury you in one.

"It's not rocket science"... neither is the skill of not pissing me off either, listen I tried to figure it out, I'm not doing it fast enough obviously, if it's so fucking easy why don't you do it?!

"I just want to touch base with you"...... touch me at all and I'm filing a complaint!

I can't say anything back usually so I just nod and smile and plot the massacre.

In the office where I worked, the pet term was "we need you to be team players" - this from managers who did everything possible to turn workers against each other and invest the workplace with a spirit of divisiveness, hostility and suspicion.

i hate "team building" speeches... anything from your 'team players' thing, to 'great work, team' make me cringe. yes, we're a team, and that's fine. team meetings are fine. but constantly referring to the team ("go team!") gets embarassing after a short, short while

"Core competency"...

Upon hearing that, I proceeded to get up, leave my MHR class, and go drinking. It was well worth it considering I ended up doing better in the class after I stopped going...ended up with an A-, actually. I also hate when they refer to us menial-level barely above minimum wage workers as "associates". I don't get profit sharing working for the university, and they don't let us collect tips, so we're not "associates" with anything.

Where were all you during my "office voice" thread yesterday? This stuff is in the same category. :p

"Core competency"...

Upon hearing that, I proceeded to get up, leave my MHR class, and go drinking. It was well worth it considering I ended up doing better in the class after I stopped going...ended up with an A-, actually. I also hate when they refer to us menial-level barely above minimum wage workers as "associates". I don't get profit sharing working for the university, and they don't let us collect tips, so we're not "associates" with anything.

Gods, I hate that specious conferral of patronizing manufactured "equality." Those jumped up middle-managers who want so much to be CEOs, but will never be more than mediocrities, with their condescending, glad-handing "we're all in this together" crap.

I wish they'd realize that we're not all in this together. I had no authority, no power and no say. What I had was responsibility without the corresponding rights. When I accomplished something, they took the credit. If I had a good idea, they put it on the back burner until sufficient time had elapsed that they could pass it off as their own. I did, however, get the privilege of taking the blame when something went wrong.

Where were all you during my "office voice" thread yesterday? This stuff is in the same category. :p

But your OP was incoherent, at least NB is making sense. I honestly had no idea wtf "Office voice" was until someone else in the thread explained it.

Anyway, the only times I've said or heard "sounds good" is to end a conversation where we resolved a problem, or resolved a course of action on a problem. *Is glad he didn't work with idiots*

Finishing up my confinement in restaurant work, I figure the rhyme "If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean" qualifies.

Going forward, I will avoid these buzzwords with due diligence.

The word "functionality."

Where I work there are different software packages assigned to different departments even though a lot of them would be useful to people in other departments. For example, one department has the ability to look up copies of canceled checks to make sure that people who say they paid did actually pay. The department whose responsibility it is to make sure that all accounts are fully paid does not have this ability.

When the managers are asked why this is they don't give the nice honest answer of "it's stupid. whaddyagonnado." They answer, "it's not part of our 'functionality.'" I add the extra quotes because this is clearly a word these people don't use in everyday conversation. They say it the same way that you might tell a small child at the zoo, "that's a 'lemur,' and it comes from a place called 'Madagascar.'"

But your OP was incoherent, at least NB is making sense. I honestly had no idea wtf "Office voice" was until someone else in the thread explained it.

That's because it wasn't about office voice in particular, at least initially. I take it as a lesson, though. Narrower topics seem to work better.

As to my euphemistic pet peeves: "value chain," "quanitiative performance measures" and "strategic planning process" probably belong there.

Geez, sounds like SOMEBODY has a case of the Mondays!
*punches Neo Art in the face* :D

Yeah, I hate pretty much all the cliches mentioned so far. I REALLY hate all "team player" bullshit. I think I hate that one the most because I have often been criticized for NOT being a "team player" -- and always after I SINGLE-HANDEDLY had to pull the whole team AND COMPANY's ass out of the fucking fire after the TEAM screwed the pooch every way those dumb motherfuckers could think of (pretending for a moment they could think at all). *fantasizes about strychnine in the guacamole*

Though I think my favorite Lumbergism was that constant, "Yeah, um, why don't you go ahead and [do that horrible, useless and abusive thing that you had no intention of ever doing and which no intelligent employer would ever ask anyone to do, and for which you're not even going to get paid anyway]."

Finishing up my confinement in restaurant work, I figure the rhyme "If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean" qualifies.

I can't stand that one. We have started "All in all out", as in, we are all in it together, so go all out to help each other. I laughed when my manager said it, thinking it was a joke. It wasn't. This coming from a manager who refuses to run food when I'm in the weeds, get plates from the dish room, or really do anything helpful.

or "I'm sorry, did I hear you say you were a runner?"
Drop the passive agressive bullshit to try to modify my behavior. It didn't work when I was 6, and it still doesn't work. If you want me to run food, just ask. I probably either a) didn't notice it sitting there or b) am actually busy.

LMGT4U. This is my restaurant's new catch phrase. It took me three weeks to figure out that it means "let me get that for you". Incidentally, it takes longer to say the acronym than just to say it or, better yet, to do it.

"Make every customer count!". I got written up for saying "to what...10?"

"Make every customer count!". I got written up for saying "to what...10?"
Nice! :D I :hail: you. A man after my own heart.

I like to turn the cliches against the typical users, or cultists, as I like to call them. My favorite was, after reaming some brown-noser several new orifices for fucking up something that I had to fix because I'm so not a team player, telling them, "That was good meeting. Very productive. 'Bye."

Thinking outside the box

Synergy

Partnering

Employee empowerment

The only time I was told by another coworker that I should be more a a team player I told them team players don't backstab each other, and since I see that more in the office than anywhere else I'm pretty sure I was more of a team player than them.
Where I currently work I can at least take comfort in the fact that everyone is qualified for the jobs they do, even if I'm unappreciated by the upper management.

Nice! :D I :hail: you. A man after my own heart.

I like to turn the cliches against the typical users, or cultists, as I like to call them. My favorite was, after reaming some brown-noser several new orifices for fucking up something that I had to fix because I'm so not a team player, telling them, "That was good meeting. Very productive. 'Bye."

nice.

when they told me I was being written up, I said "for what?", they said "your attitude here is pretty bad". My response was "well, the job sucks. But I'd say that joke was the best attitude I've had here in months"

They still were not amused.


A few years back, when I worked at a summer camp as a lifeguard, we were going into a pretty serious heat wave. This camp had only one small room with AC (the nurses station), and about 400 campers for the session. The catchphrase became "What can I do to help?", as in, how can I keep the kids from overheating. We had a 5 AM meeting of all staff to discuss this. We broke down into our teams (each group of counselors based off the age groups they work with, and lifeguards in their own seperate group, as we deal with all the kids.). We had 30 minutes to come up with an idea. They got to us to share our ideas, and we collectively said "...dude. We're lifeguards. We make the kids swim even when it's 60 degrees out. Seriously?"

We all got reprimanded, and came up with the idea to use spray bottles on our off shifts. What the management didn't realize is that we were short staffed, and no lifeguard had an off shift.

There was a time I was working at Sunset (a restarant up here) as a host. They had overstaffed us again. There were 6 of us on, plus four people being trained. This left one person working as point (directing the rest of us), two people seating guests, and the rest of us to bus the tables. There were a whole 30 customers in the place. The owner yelled at us for standing around, and told us that a good employee should be able to make work for themselves. So I had my trainee go around and put dirty glasses on each open table, then picked each one up individually, brought it to the back, and wiped down each table. When asked, I said "I'm making work for myself". Only reason I wasn't fired is because the owner really liked me and has a similar sense of humor.


...I really am an awful employee.

Utilize.

People who complain about pet-peeves just bother the crap out of me, gawd....

People who complain about pet-peeves just bother the crap out of me, gawd....

*gives swirly*

...I really am an awful employee.
Nah, you're the best employee. They're just too stupid to know it. ;)

*gives swirly*

*sues for Waterboarding* :p

Nah, you're the best employee. They're just too stupid to know it. ;)

Oddly enough, that's what dad said.

Mom gave me a pamphlet that she had gotten. She just started her own home business, and so got onto a mailing list. This particular pamphlet was for a seminar on how to effectively manage problem employees, breaking them down into 15 categories. She had highlighted 12 that I very clearly fit into...


mind you, I'm actually a good employee in that I do my job very well, and generally do more than what is asked. I just get very bored very easily, and need to entertain myself :)

fyi

Kind of redundant if you're sending me information and informing me that it's for my information.

Even worse if you use "fyi" in conversation.

The worst euphemisms of all, though, are "downsized," "outsourced" and, if your British, "made redundant."

All the wonderful ways people have of saying, "you're fired." Like rephrasing makes it less hurtful.

..."It's not rocket science"...

I used to work with a bloke that was always mangling his cliches. One day he declared, "It's not rocket surgery."

It became a workplace standard in the office.

The worst euphemisms of all, though, are "downsized," "outsourced" and, if your British, "made redundant."

All the wonderful ways people have of saying, "you're fired." Like rephrasing makes it less hurtful.

last sundays dilbert comic come to mind here.

http://www.dilbert.com/strips/comic/2009-03-29/

I used to work with a bloke that was always mangling his cliches. One day he declared, "It's not rocket surgery."

It became a workplace standard in the office.
I've heard that floating around the universe. I've kind of adopted it, for some situations.

I used to work with a bloke that was always mangling his cliches. One day he declared, "It's not rocket surgery."

It became a workplace standard in the office.

haha, I remember see that on we can be heroes I use it as reference joke myself.

I used to hate hate hate "Smiling on the phone". I worked in a call centre.

I also have a major problem with the euphemism, "disengaged from the formal learning process" to describe poorly behaved children.