NationStates Jolt Archive

which subject do you think they will go after next and how?


I think history. They will try to use the idea that the history we know is just stories told so much we think it is history, and thus the word is only 6000 years old. I forget the name of it at the moment. I've tired google and wiki, but can't find the term >_<.







(note: this is not a creationism is right/wrong thread. It is just a random thought I had "what will they do next?")

They shall never be done with science, and they already claim the corner on history.

you might be right. It is the mathamitions (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDfn4PevTAw) we might have to worry about.

Nah, it'll be the geologists. Tectonic theory is incompatible with revealed lies, you know.

which subject do you think they will go after next and how?


I think history. They will try to use the idea that the history we know is just stories told so much we think it is history, and thus the word is only 6000 years old. I forget the name of it at the moment. I've tired google and wiki, but can't find the term >_<.







(note: this is not a creationism is right/wrong thread. It is just a random thought I had "what will they do next?")
not history so much as archeology.....oh thats science eh?

If you are going to post random thoughts about how stupid and backwards people who believe in creationism are compared to people who believe in science, it helps your case if you don't misspell 'creationism' in the title.

As a linguist, I floated the idea of "Babelism" before. :p

If you are going to post random thoughts about how stupid and backwards people who believe in creationism are compared to people who believe in science, it helps your case if you don't misspell 'creationism' in the title.
QFT. it's spelled 'cretinism', just pronounced 'creationism'.

Creationism doesn't really challenge history.
bible literalist do. However, the literlist have long ago learned to be quite when a history professors shows up. mostly because a history professor can talk a literlast into some outrageous claims along the lines of all historical proof you have is forgeries by the devil.

QFT. it's spelled 'cretinism', just pronounced 'creationism'.


QFT.

I can't believe this crap. Do they honestly believe what they say, or is it just a moneyspinner for televangelists?

What a tragedy.

Unfortunately, it's not history or maths I see the fundies going after, it's law so they can create a theocratic wonderland.

I am disgusted and appalled that you people would have disrespect for the ultimate truth that is "Crationism", the well respected and scientifically supported model that the earth was unpacked, by God, from a giant crate labeled "Deluxe Earth Playset, Lifeform Accessories Included, Read Manual Before Breathing Life Into".

And this crate came with an instruction manual. Its called The Bible, people!

Learn all this and more at Steven Baldwin's Extreme Teen Faith Based Crationsim Evangelical Education Seminar and Porn Addiction Disability Filing Workshop, at fine "Best Western" Motels and Conference Centers throughout the midwest!

Unfortunately, it's not history or maths I see the fundies going after, it's law so they can create a theocratic wonderland.

First of all, you Catholics aren't real Christians. I know, because I read it in a Chick Pamphlet.

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/0071/0071_01.asp

which subject do you think they will go after next and how?


I think history. They will try to use the idea that the history we know is just stories told so much we think it is history, and thus the word is only 6000 years old. I forget the name of it at the moment. I've tired google and wiki, but can't find the term >_<.


I think you're thinking of "Young Earth" creationism. That's the variety that attacks archaeology and geology and so on.

I think you're thinking of "Young Earth" creationism. That's the variety that attacks archaeology and geology and so on.

There is only ONE kind of crationism, and that is BIBLICAL crationism.

Besides, six millenium is hardly young. Once you open the crate, entropy takes over and everything goes to shit

I think PE what with going outside being the natural enemy of fantasy

it's law so they can create a theocratic wonderland.

hurray! *watches it rain Easter eggs*

QFT.

I can't believe this crap. Do they honestly believe what they say, or is it just a moneyspinner for televangelists?

What a tragedy.QFT because everyone was QFT, and I wanted join the fun and QFT something.


And whoever we are talking about is evil/stupid/made of happy chocolate and such and such and whatnot.

qft because everyone was qft, and i wanted join the fun and qft something.


QFT. (Hm. Wonder why it won't let me capitalize QFT when it's alone?)

(hm. Wonder why it won't let me capitalize qft when it's alone?)

qft

I think creationists are going to fizzle and die over the next twenty years or so.

I'm a Christian and I believe in evolution. Science works.

I think creationists are going to fizzle and die over the next twenty years or so.

I'm a Christian and I believe in evolution. Science works.

that was mentioned after the scopes monkey trial.

Once they're done with science, the crationists will obviously go after the creationists. Fighting other groups and crationism go together like Scientology and stupid. They're going to keep on fighting until Jesus or Anpu comes and kicks their asses or something. Anpu would fight them with doomsday devices. Jesus would turn the other cheek which, according to random hobos living in the internet's tubes, houses either a laser or a flamethrower, depending on who's version you believe.

you know, one little problem with that 6000 year figure, is that the christian bible itself covers, or at least refers to, if you count the one after another in the book of numbers, something closer to more in the range of 24-25 thousand years!

which pretty much puts first messiah adam, back in auldivoi, where that would make sense.

also, since its concern is entirely with spiritual matters of the human species, there's no way it which it makes any kind of sense to use it as a guage of anything prior to humanity's appearance on planet earth.

As long as we keep them out of the performing arts, I'm happy.

As long as we keep them out of the performing arts, I'm happy.

no. we bring them into the correct performing arts. Bring back gladiatorial events and have different groups of creationist go against each other in fights to the death.
returns performing arts to interesting stuff, and reduces the number of creationist. Win Win really.

I'm a Christian and I believe in evolution.

Not possible. For there to be a God, nothing could have evolved. Can't you see how incompatible the two ideas are?

Just kidding, I consider myself a creationist... from the perspective that God created everything, evolution's also got my backing because that has some pretty good evidence going for it, so I too, am a Christian who believes in evolution. I was listening to some Jesusy radio the other day, and some movie reviewer cautioned parents that "Under the Sea" might be a controversial IMAX movie because the beginning seemed to suggest evolution might have happened (gasp!) he then went on to note that at some point the same movie said a creature was "designed" a certain well, well if something is designed, it has a designer! I almost called in and asked why exactly creation couldn't have happened slowly, and why it's any less beautiful than the ten-minute version.

Alright, thats my rant, I'm done, sorry.

no. we bring them into the correct performing arts. Bring back gladiatorial events and have different groups of creationist go against each other in fights to the death.
returns performing arts to interesting stuff, and reduces the number of creationist. Win Win really.

You know what? Gladatorial events in general should be brought back. You got a beef with your neighbor, why murder him? Challenge him to a duel, and sign up at the local arena.

Now that would stimulate the economy.

You know what? Gladatorial events in general should be brought back. You got a beef with your neighbor, why murder him? Challenge him to a duel, and sign up at the local arena.

Now that would stimulate the economy.

i run a fencing school. it would do wonders for my business. Id have to switch to teaching gladius and trident. But still so very profitable for me.

QFT because everyone was QFT, and I wanted join the fun and QFT something.


And whoever we are talking about is evil/stupid/made of happy chocolate and such and such and whatnot.


I've never been QFT before. :fluffle:

Well, as a Russian Orthodox archaeologist, I know I'm constantly manipulating my archaeological interpretations to prove that the Pope of Rome is a schismatic heretic in league with freemasons, and that American fundamentalists are secret crypto-Catholics in denial. It's what we do, we church-going archaeologists, you see. We ignore all evidence in order to advance our own secret masterplan for world domination.

And now that I've told you, I'm going to have to kill you.


More seriously, any academic discipline is going to attract its fair share of loonies. Archaeology does seem to attract more than its fair share, from literal Biblical creationists through to Mu and Atlantis theorists and - and I have a book on this; good for a laugh - practitioners of psychic archaeology. What's depressing about archaeology is that the 'bad' archaeology (aliens, Jesus tombs, white pre-Columbian civilisations in the Americas, etc.) often seems to have a far higher public profile - and sell more books - than the 'good' archaeology based on boring stuff like sound excavation techniques and balanced interpretation.

Perhaps part of the problem is that archaeological interpretation is often fundamentally based on piecing together circumstantial evidence - and as a site is destroyed once it's excavated, archaeology isn't subject to the same level replicability of results that's the central feature of the scientific method. This means that even respectable fieldwork can generate multiple conflicting interpretations.

So archaeology is perhaps prone to a corollary of the 'it's just a theory' tactic used by creationists. Call it the 'well, if they can't agree among themselves anyway, then why can't my interpretation be right too?' principle. And when us professional archaeologists don't agree, it's because we're 'part of the system' and 'protecting our careers'.

Those interested in the topic may find the following link to be of interest:

http://www.badarchaeology.net/index.php (http://www.badarchaeology.net/index.php)

Hmmm. That was dangerously close to a thread-jack. Maybe I shoud start my own bad archaeology thread.


As to Crationism, this just proves that crate-worshipping Melanasian cargo cults have gained far, far more traction in the industrialised west than I'd previously realised.

Actually, their next target will be mathematics (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bible_pi#Biblical_value). :headbang:

:eek2: Did a new religious ideal just get created from a typo?





I do so love this forum.

which subject do you think they will go after next and how?


I think history. They will try to use the idea that the history we know is just stories told so much we think it is history, and thus the word is only 6000 years old. I forget the name of it at the moment. I've tired google and wiki, but can't find the term >_<.







(note: this is not a creationism is right/wrong thread. It is just a random thought I had "what will they do next?")

proving life on other planets? tho if they can 'prove' creationism... then chances are, they've 'proven' the existance of God.

so Life on other planets would be 'small potatoes'. perhaps a way to communicate with God by using means outside of prayer...

Creationism doesn't really challenge history.
bible literalist do. However, the literlist have long ago learned to be quite when a history professors shows up. mostly because a history professor can talk a literlast into some outrageous claims along the lines of all historical proof you have is forgeries by the devil.

To be "quite" what?

proving life on other planets? tho if they can 'prove' creationism... then chances are, they've 'proven' the existance of God.

so Life on other planets would be 'small potatoes'. perhaps a way to communicate with God by using means outside of prayer...

Now that would be a trick. An interesting idea. I wonder if anyone has tried that beaming a message into space addressed to God just to see if he would respond back.

You would have to be pretty smart about it. Write the message in an ancient language that maybe only he and handful of other people would know. The trick would finding the right frequency. He seems to like 3 and 40 a lot. Maybe 340 MHz or 333Mhz.

The trick would finding the right frequency.

I think the hardest part would be to find the right direction to send it to. ,)

SNIP

an entire discipline revolving around fat hairy men getting sweaty is full of loons you say!?

I think you've been spending too much time around those lead pipes.

You would have to be pretty smart about it. Write the message in an ancient language that maybe only he and handful of other people would know. The trick would finding the right frequency. He seems to like 3 and 40 a lot. Maybe 340 MHz or 333Mhz.

actually people have been doing it for years hence why churches have spires :p

I think the hardest part would be to find the right direction to send it to. ,)

well its not going to be down

I am disgusted and appalled that you people would have disrespect for the ultimate truth that is "Crationism", the well respected and scientifically supported model that the earth was unpacked, by God, from a giant crate labeled "Deluxe Earth Playset, Lifeform Accessories Included, Read Manual Before Breathing Life Into".

And this crate came with an instruction manual. Its called The Bible, people!

Learn all this and more at Steven Baldwin's Extreme Teen Faith Based Crationsim Evangelical Education Seminar and Porn Addiction Disability Filing Workshop, at fine "Best Western" Motels and Conference Centers throughout the midwest!

Do you suppose God, being impatient like all male teens, decided to forego reading the instructions and just decided to wing it? That would explain a lot.

an entire discipline revolving around fat hairy men getting sweaty is full of loons you say!?

I think you've been spending too much time around those lead pipes.


Old (sexist) archaeology joke:

Q: How can you spot an archaeologist?

A: By the extensive facial hair, pint glass and muddy boots - and that's just the women!


For the record, however, I'm thin, balding, shaved and showered this morning, know where my deodorant is, am wearing Ecco shoes and fashionable Spanish jeans, and my colourful jumper is a John Smedley rather than something my mother in law made.

Bigoted negative stereotyping of archaeologists hurts us, you know. We're people too - even the fat sweaty ones.

Old (sexist) archaeology joke:

Q: How can you spot an archaeologist?

A: By the extensive facial hair, pint glass and muddy boots - and that's just the women!


For the record, however, I'm thin, balding, shaved and showered this morning, know where my deoderant is, am wearing Ecco shoes and fashionable Spanish jeans, and my colourful jumper is a John Smedley rather than something my mother in law made.

Bigoted negative stereotyping of archaeologists hurts us, you know. We're people too - even the fat sweaty ones.

Then you don't want people thinking Indiana Jones or Lara Crofts?

Then you don't want people thinking Indiana Jones or Lara Crofts?

Ah, well, that's the second stereotype. The third involves pith helmets and mummies.

In public, we spend most of our time decrying Dr. Jones and Ms. Croft as unrealistic portrayals of our discipline that perpetuate negative paradigms of archaeologists as thrill-seeking treasure hunters.

Secretly, we all have posters of Indy and/or Lara hidden away in our offices, or - in my case - a fedora and a leather jacket.

January 22, 1939

Assistant Professor Henry "Indiana" Jones Jr.
Department of Anthropology
Chapman Hall 227B
Marshall College

Dr. Jones:

As chairman of the Committee on Promotion and Tenure, I regret to inform you that your recent application for tenure has been denied by a vote of 6 to 1. Following past policies and procedures, proceedings from the committee's deliberations that were pertinent to our decision have been summarized below according to the assessment criteria.

Demonstrates suitable experience and expertise in chosen field:

The committee concurred that Dr. Jones does seem to possess a nearly superhuman breadth of linguistic knowledge and an uncanny familiarity with the history and material culture of the occult. However, his understanding and practice of archaeology gave the committee the greatest cause for alarm. Criticisms of Dr. Jones ranged from "possessing a perceptible methodological deficiency" to "practicing archaeology with a complete lack of, disregard for, and colossal ignorance of current methodology, theory, and ethics" to "unabashed grave-robbing." Given such appraisals, perhaps it isn't surprising to learn that several Central and South American countries recently assembled to enact legislation aimed at permanently prohibiting his entry.

Moreover, no one on the committee can identify who or what instilled Dr. Jones with the belief that an archaeologist's tool kit should consist solely of a bullwhip and a revolver.

Nationally recognized for an effectual program of scholarship or research supported by publications of high quality:

Though Dr. Jones conducts "field research" far more often than anyone else in the department, he has consistently failed to report the results of his excavations, provide any credible evidence of attending the archaeological conferences he claims to attend, or produce a single published article in any peer-reviewed journal. Someone might tell Dr. Jones that in academia "publish or perish" is the rule. Shockingly, there is little evidence to date that Dr. Jones has successfully excavated even one object since he arrived at Marshall College. Marcus Brody, curator of our natural-history museum, assured me this was not so and graciously pointed out several pieces in the collection that he claimed were procured through Dr. Jones's efforts, but, quite frankly, we have not one shred of documentation that can demonstrate the provenance or legal ownership of these objects.

Meets professional standards of conduct in research and professional activities of the discipline:

The committee was particularly generous (and vociferous) in offering their opinions regarding this criterion. Permit me to list just a few of the more troubling accounts I was privy to during the committee's meeting. Far more times than I would care to mention, the name "Indiana Jones" (the adopted title Dr. Jones insists on being called) has appeared in governmental reports linking him to the Nazi Party, black-market antiquities dealers, underground cults, human sacrifice, Indian child slave labor, and the Chinese mafia. There are a plethora of international criminal charges against Dr. Jones, which include but are not limited to: bringing unregistered weapons into and out of the country; property damage; desecration of national and historical landmarks; impersonating officials; arson; grand theft (automobiles, motorcycles, aircraft, and watercraft in just a one week span last year); excavating without a permit; countless antiquities violations; public endangerment; voluntary and involuntary manslaughter; and, allegedly, murder.

Dr. Jones's interpersonal skills and relationships are no better. By Dr. Jones's own admission, he has repeatedly employed an underage Asian boy as a driver and "personal assistant" during his Far East travels. I will refrain from making any insinuations as to the nature of this relationship, but my intuition insists that it is not a healthy one, nor one to be encouraged. Though the committee may have overstepped the boundaries of its evaluation, I find it pertinent to note that Dr. Jones has been romantically linked to countless women of questionable character, an attribute very unbecoming of a Marshall College professor. One of these women was identified as a notorious nightclub singer whose heart he attempted to extract with his hands, and whom he then tried, and failed, to lower into a lake of magma. Another was a Nazi scholar he was seen courting just last year who, I'm told, plummeted into a fathomless abyss at Dr. Jones's hand. And, of course, no one can forget the slow decline and eventual death of Professor Abner Ravenwood after Dr. Jones's affair with Abner's underage daughter was made public, forcing her to emigrate to Nepal to escape the debacle.

Demonstrates successful record in undergraduate and graduate teaching:

In his nine years with the department, Dr. Jones has failed to complete even one uninterrupted semester of instruction. In fact, he hasn't been in attendance for more than four consecutive weeks since he was hired. Departmental records indicate Dr. Jones has taken more sabbaticals, sick time, personal days, conference allotments, and temporary leaves than all the other members of the department combined.

The lone student representative on the committee wished to convey that, besides being an exceptional instructor, a compassionate mentor, and an unparalleled gentleman, Dr. Jones was extraordinarily receptive to the female student body during and after the transition to a coeducational system at the college. However, his timeliness in grading and returning assignments was a concern.

Establishment of an appropriate record of departmental and campus service:

Dr. Jones's behavior on campus has led not only to disciplinary action but also to concerns as to the state of his mental health. In addition to multiple instances of public drunkenness, Dr. Jones, on three separate occasions, has attempted to set fire to the herpetology wing of the biology department. Perhaps most disturbing, however, are the statements that come directly from Dr. Jones's mouth. Several faculty members maintain that Dr. Jones informed them on multiple occasions of having discovered the Ark of the Covenant, magic diamond rocks, and the Holy Grail! When asked to provide evidence for such claims, he purportedly replied that he was "kind of immortal" and/or muttered derogatory statements about the "bureaucratic fools" running the U.S. government. Given his history with the Nazi Party, I fear where his loyalty lies.

- - - -

To summarize, the committee fails to recognize any indication that Dr. Jones is even remotely proficient when it comes to archaeological scholarship and practice. His aptitude as an instructor is questionable at best, his conduct while abroad is positively deplorable, and his behavior on campus is minimally better. Marshall College has a reputation to uphold. I need not say more.

My apologies,

Prof. G.L. Stevens
Chairman

I think the hardest part would be to find the right direction to send it to. ,)


I would send to the center of the universe where else would he be.

an entire discipline revolving around fat hairy men getting sweaty is full of loons you say!?

I think you've been spending too much time around those lead pipes.



actually people have been doing it for years hence why churches have spires :p



well its not going to be down

Is that what those are for? Who knew they housed satellite equipment.

well its not going to be down

Seeing as Earth is spinning on it´s axis.
In orbit around the sun of our solar system.
Who spins around the black hole in the middle of our galaxy.
Which is moving around in the universe.
A 3 dimensional universe at that.

Who knows, maybe. ,)

I would send to the center of the universe where else would he be.

That would be mighty hard to pinpoint to any greater degree.
Even if our universe had a true center.