NationStates Jolt Archive

So my aunty died in Denmark a couple of days ago and I'll be flying over for the funeral at some point in the near future. The thing is, I have no idea what a Danish funeral will be like. Is one expected to wear black like in the UK? Does one order flowers? Your help would be much appreciated.

I'm hoping for a Viking funeral with a burning long boat and plenty of mead but I fear I wil be disappointed. :(

In the hope of making this into a nice counter point to the sickening Valentines day threads knocking about at the moment, how do you dispose of the dead in your country? What funeral traditions do you have? What do you want to happen to your carcass after you shuffle off this mortal coil?

do we have Wakes in the UK? cos i've never been to one

I love funerals. Hate death, but I think the closure that comes from funerals is really important.

I don't think black is really a requirement any more, although muted tones seems to be pretty standard. I've been to . . . too many funerals, and I don't think I've ever worn black, although honestly I was in such shock and young enough for 2 of them that someone else probably dressed me, so I'm not sure.

I want to donate any and all organs that could help save other lives, and have whatever is left be cremated and then have the cremains buried. I think it helps mourners to have a place to go to focus and remember. I know it has helped me.

I suppose I'd just give my body to medicine, donating my organs and whatnot, assuming they're still in decent condition. I certainly won't need my body anymore, why not give it to someone who does?

On a somewhat related note, I've always wanted to try mead. Has anyone tried it? If so, is it any good?

I suppose I'd just give my body to medicine, donating my organs and whatnot, assuming they're still in decent condition. I certainly won't need my body anymore, why not give it to someone who does?

On a somewhat related note, I've always wanted to try mead. Has anyone tried it? If so, is it any good?

Firstly, no no no about donating your body.

Second, mead is delicious.

do we have Wakes in the UK? cos i've never been to one

My family is all Irish ancestory, we definately have wakes.

Seeing dead bodies gives me the jibblies. I can spend all day at a funeral, but seeing a dead body makes me feel ill.

I think Denmark is the place where the surviving family members are expected to eat the dead relative's brains.
They don't actually announce it or anything, you're just supposed to lean over the coffin and dig in.

Here in Spain, we drink for a full day in honour of the dead.

I think Denmark is the place where the surviving family members are expected to eat the dead relative's brains.
They don't actually announce it or anything, you're just supposed to lean over the coffin and dig in.

Makes sense. How else does one pass on the strength and experience of the deceased?

It's not like those poor backwards sons of bitches can do it through speach or the written word, they're still communicating through grunts and pointing. Remember this if you're ever in a Danish bar, grunting at a group of girls and then pointing at your crotch is guaranteed to get you laid.

Here in Spain, we drink for a full day in honour of the dead.

I did that yesterday. This morning I was wishing I could join them. :(

I did that yesterday. This morning I was wishing I could join them. :(

I am sorry for your loss, Fartsy.:(

I am sorry for your loss, Fartsy.:(

Hangover, not depression.

Hangover, not depression.

Exactly my point.

Firstly, no no no about donating your body.
Er...why not?

Second, mead is delicious.
Good to know. Thanks.

do we have Wakes in the UK? cos i've never been to one
Yes.

do we have Wakes in the UK? cos i've never been to one

They tend to lurk behind Ships.

Burn me and throw the ashes over a cliff overlooking the ocean.

Burn me and throw the ashes over a cliff overlooking the ocean.

Right now? Or wait until you're dead?

Right now? Or wait until you're dead?

Well it did say after you were dead. I have a few things I still need to do before I get the heave :p

Funerals and wakes are bloody depressing. The people are always depressing. I hate doing it, and I hate having to pretend I care about being there. I hate it even more when I have to pretend to know someone, and yet, I'm going to be introduced as "John's daughter" or "The daughter in law". No one will remember my damn name anyway and I'll never see these people again, so why do I have to hug you...?

Which is why I'm going to ensure that when I die, in my will it explicitly forbids anyone for praying for me, or doing any ritualistic BS. I want my carcass thrown into Lake Ontario, or fail that, my ashes thrown into Lake Ontario.

On a somewhat related note, I've always wanted to try mead. Has anyone tried it? If so, is it any good?

Mead is like many other beverages: there are good bottles and bad bottles. And many, many different flavours, depending on age, type of honey used, additives and so on.

But some is really quite nice, yes ;)

As for the main topic: sorry, no idea :(

I wanna be Cremated,(and i want money on me too dammit, see if i get left out cause I didnt have any money, lol)... and people to have a party around my roasting carcass complete with lots of drunken revelry...Maybe roast some marshmallows on it, lol...


They usually just bury people and everyone is standing around...pretty boring really...

I like much of the Jewish ritual...pine box, no embalming. My family has given up on the whole "24 hours" thing...not enough time to deal with life as it comes.

I also usually drink heavily for a day or two.

I like much of the Jewish ritual...pine box, no embalming. My family has given up on the whole "24 hours" thing...not enough time to deal with life as it comes.

I also usually drink heavily for a day or two.

Did you also cover the mirrors?

I like much of the Jewish ritual...pine box, no embalming. My family has given up on the whole "24 hours" thing...not enough time to deal with life as it comes.

I also usually drink heavily for a day or two.

I have a feeling that's a pan-cultural tradition.

Did you also cover the mirrors?

for my grandparents, no. For my great uncle, I believe the immediate family did

I think I'll syncretise a few different funerary traditions for my own death.

I will definitely put it in my will for my family to have an Irish wake for me. The German and Scottish relatives can have their own separate wakes, and the Sicilian relatives get to decide what to do with the body, because their good at that sort of thing. The English relatives get to pay for the drinks consumed by the Irish, Germans, and Scots.

I'll have a standard Jewish funeral, with one minor twist - my tomb will be built like a tiny missile silo, and my coffin will be a missile capable of reaching Jerusalem. That way, when the Messiah comes, I won't roll underground towards Jerusalem - I'll fly there!

Here in Spain, we drink for a full day in honour of the dead.
There is always somebody dying somewhere in the world, and it for the past two years it has been my job to honor each and every one of them. This liver's for you, you nameless sons-and-daughters-of-bitches.

Wakes are important so that everyone can get together to share their memories & emotions. Alcohol usually helps that process.

I recenlty went to a full blown Catholic funeral, which I hadn't previously experienced. It was very long & boring, with much ritual chanting, bobbing up & down and (dare I say it) pagan symbolism. Sadly, there was actually very little said about the deceased, it was mostly about Jesus and/or God. It struck me as actually quite impersonal and very obviously derived from a period in time when mosts of the attendees would have been illiterate (and/or wouldn't have been able to understand the latin that the ceremony would have been conducted in anyway).

I'd like to be buried in the cemetary (it's a little lawn cemetary) in the small town where I grew up, with a simple headstone & completely religion free ceremony. A good wake with plenty of food & drink is a must also, an opportunity for friends & family to get together & discuss what a great bloke/total wanker I was. I hate the big stone graves with statuary & pictures, that are jammed up against eachother. They look like they're fighting for space, screaming out to be noticed. It's quite sad actually.

Funerals and wakes are bloody depressing. The people are always depressing. I hate doing it, and I hate having to pretend I care about being there. I hate it even more when I have to pretend to know someone, and yet, I'm going to be introduced as "John's daughter" or "The daughter in law". No one will remember my damn name anyway and I'll never see these people again, so why do I have to hug you...?

Which is why I'm going to ensure that when I die, in my will it explicitly forbids anyone for praying for me, or doing any ritualistic BS. I want my carcass thrown into Lake Ontario, or fail that, my ashes thrown into Lake Ontario.
We travel in very different groups.

At a reception after a funeral once, I laughed so hard soda came out of my nose. I was sitting at a table with the deceased's daughter and all her friends.

Also, my great-uncle died when the whole family, and some of my aunts friends were hanging out together around a bonfire.
Grandma: Your Uncle Joe died.
Aunt Casey's Friend (aside): Oh gosh, what should we say? What should we do????
Aunt Marie's Hubby: Same thing the Courts always do. Wait 10 minutes, and then start making fun of them!
Seven minutes later . . .
Aunt Casey: Hey, Janine, wasn't Uncle Joe the one who got drunk and tried to dance inappropriately with you at my wedding?

Wakes are important so that everyone can get together to share their memories & emotions. Alcohol usually helps that process.

I think a wake usually involves looking at the body? Most funerals I've been to did this at the reception/luncheon/whatever afterward...


I recenlty went to a full blown Catholic funeral, which I hadn't previously experienced. It was very long & boring, with much ritual chanting, bobbing up & down and (dare I say it) pagan symbolism.
I mean, the majority of the funerals/memorials (or, at least, most important ones) I've been to have been Catholic. I find the ritual comforting, but then, I was raised Catholic so I'm used to it. . .

i want to be buried in a Barrel of Chimay.

I think a wake usually involves looking at the body? Most funerals I've been to did this at the reception/luncheon/whatever afterward...


I mean, the majority of the funerals/memorials (or, at least, most important ones) I've been to have been Catholic. I find the ritual comforting, but then, I was raised Catholic so I'm used to it. . .

To me, a wake is the get toghether that's held after the funeral & interrment/cremation, so viewing the body could be somewhat problematic.

I prefer funerals where loved ones get up talk about the person's life & what he or she meant to them. Not where a priest, who most probably only knows the deceased slightly if at all, drones on & on about what Jesus, God & the bible says.

i want to be buried in a Barrel of Chimay.

I admire your ambition & well may you be successful! :wink:

II've always wanted to try mead. Has anyone tried it? If so, is it any good?
Yes, often, and it's delicious. It's just honey wine, and if you've a decent liquor store they can order you a bottle.

I think a wake usually involves looking at the body? Most funerals I've been to did this at the reception/luncheon/whatever afterward...Originally they were for keeping an eye on the body, overnight, to make sure that it didn't get up and wander away... or start trying to eat people's brainnnnssss...

I've spent years going to wakes in which I expressed my sympathies to the surviving family members and avoided going near the casket like the plague. Obviously, I've made the odd exception for close family members, but my favorite place is at the back of the viewing room, or near the side.

do we have Wakes in the UK? cos i've never been to one

Every funeral I've attended has.

I am unsure of the culture regarding you situation. Sorry for your loss. When I shuffle of the mortal coil I want a horse driven hearse with a brass band (new orleans style) with one of those dancing guys at the front Given the opportunity I would like my own pre-recorded eulogy to be played on widescreen in the church as I am without doubt the best placed to do it. If its summer I would like a picnic for my wake kids playing footy and lots of drunken adults, winter a pub with a log fire kids playing hide and seek. Not that I have thought about it at all.