NationStates Jolt Archive


I'll do anything for love, but I won't do that

Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 06:47
How much would you take from your partner before throwing your hands up and saying "That's it, I'm done"? I ask because I've seen people who are in terrible relationships, and they just keep coming back for more, it's really perplexing.

As for me, as long as I get treated as an equal, be given respect, and we get along fine, I'm happy. But if things start to get out of balance, and if it's not soon corrected, then I'm out.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 06:52
I'm not sure, lots of people (seemingly women more often; no offense intended) will stay in a horrible or one sided relationship for what seems an inordinate amount of time, and some people will even endure things getting worse for the sake of keeping it.
Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 06:54
I'm not sure, lots of people (seemingly women more often; no offense intended) will stay in a horrible or one sided relationship for what seems an inordinate amount of time, and some people will even endure things getting worse for the sake of keeping it.

Well that's better than the theory I've heard earlier today. That people who are in love, (and she meant really in love) will endure alot because they love that person, and love makes them into idiots.

Maybe it's my cynical outlook on love, but I believe that love has a limit.
Modern Outlaws
27-01-2009, 06:56
Being on an episode of Cops is my breaking point.
Todsboro
27-01-2009, 07:01
If her meatloaf is good, then I'm willing to put up with more shit than I otherwise would.

But, yeah, I've never understood the whole sticking with a bad relationship thing, especially when there's no kids involved. Too many fish in the sea, and all that.


Being on an episode of Cops is my breaking point.

"Stop resisting! STOP RESISTING!!!"

*cut to significant other*

"DON'T TASE HIM, BRO!!!"
SaintB
27-01-2009, 07:11
My breaking point really depends, it mostly has to do with trust, once I realize they don't trust me, or I don't trust them its going to be over.
Luna Amore
27-01-2009, 07:12
http://www.thehumorarchives.com/attachment/939/meatloaf.png

Serious note to answer OP: I'm inclined to think that I'd stand by my wife no matter what.
Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 07:17
Serious note to answer OP: I'm inclined to think that I'd stand by my wife no matter what.

But what if your wife was abusive? Would you still stand by her?
Galloism
27-01-2009, 07:19
Being on an episode of Cops is my breaking point.

This.

I'll endure a lot, in fact, as the years have gone by, I'm much more tolerant than I used to be about a lot of things. Age and desperation has a tendency to do that to a person.
However, being on an episode of cops is a sign.
Gracenhom
27-01-2009, 07:22
Some people prefere to stay with what they know. If a relationship becomes 'familiar', leaving, to start all over again, may seem more difficult that staying.
I will stay in a relationship so long as I'm treated as an equal, with respect and trust and all that jazz.
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 07:37
Well that's better than the theory I've heard earlier today. That people who are in love, (and she meant really in love) will endure alot because they love that person, and love makes them into idiots.

Maybe it's my cynical outlook on love, but I believe that love has a limit.

Depends on the person and the love. I still do love my ex, even though I am deeply and profoundly terrified of him, even though he treated me beyond abysmally. I absolutely do not want ever to see him again, but I still love him, and I endured an awful lot because of it.
Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 07:39
Depends on the person and the love. I still do love my ex, even though I am deeply and profoundly terrified of him, even though he treated me beyond abysmally. I absolutely do not want ever to see him again, but I still love him, and I endured an awful lot because of it.

See, I think everyone has a breaking point, and I dunno. I see some people who are in crappy relationships, and I just gotta wonder "What is their breaking point?"
SaintB
27-01-2009, 07:44
Depends on the person and the love. I still do love my ex, even though I am deeply and profoundly terrified of him, even though he treated me beyond abysmally. I absolutely do not want ever to see him again, but I still love him, and I endured an awful lot because of it.

Its times like this I have to seriously resist the urge to give some kind of inspirational speech.

EDIT: Oh, and what was the breaking point? Since its part of the OP.
Maraque
27-01-2009, 07:46
I stayed in a relationship where I was sexually and physically assaulted for two years because I loved him.

I'll never understand why I endured it for so long.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 07:47
I stayed in a relationship where I was sexually and physically assaulted for two years because I loved him.

I'll never understand why I endured it for so long.

*Must resist urge to give speech...*

Perhaps i should just stay out of this thread...
NERVUN
27-01-2009, 07:50
With me the breaking point was being forced to drive back to Reno from San Fran at 2:30 in the morning.

But having put up with a lot before that, part of it for me was an inability to understand that there could be someone else.
Veblenia
27-01-2009, 07:52
Being on an episode of Cops is my breaking point.

:eek: Watching an episode of Cops is my breaking point.
greed and death
27-01-2009, 07:54
breaking point of the relationship is generally trust. Or if they demand something i cant give because it conflicts my values.

love beyond a relationship. like trying to rescue someone. that takes a beating. sleep with my friend, beg me to take her back then sleep with my friend again. yeah i kept trying after that. Drag my name though the mud, tell my professors i got her on drugs (when i was out of town when she became an addict). Show up at parties i am throwing and start trying to tell everyone i am a bad person there. published notes on face book claiming i raped her.

finally i jsut said i was giving her up for lent . and haven't talked to her since.
Modern Outlaws
27-01-2009, 07:56
This.

I'll endure a lot, in fact, as the years have gone by, I'm much more tolerant than I used to be about a lot of things. Age and desperation has a tendency to do that to a person.
However, being on an episode of cops is a sign.

My second semester senior year of college was like that. I'm honestly surprised my apartment never was on an episode of cops. There were many a night I would come home, a little more than buzzed, and one of my roommates and his girl would be arguing over god knows what. And of course, he'd be shirtless in his boxers and flip flops, and she'd be in one of his wife beaters with an unidentifiable stains and a thong that was about a size too small.

She punched him once, so he broke up with her. They got back together, then he danced with some chick or something and she broke down his door. He responded in kind by cheating on her. That was my breaking point in their relationship. Four in the morning and me being woken from a pleasant dream to hear her sobbing about, and I shit you not, how she didn't know he "couldn't tell it wasn't her p***y on him" (he used the I was drunk excuse).

I guess I deserved it, as the truth was I saw the relationship for what it was, horribly abusive, and made the moral call to end it before he ended up shooting her in self defense. I set up the one night stand, and covered for him when she was asking where he was. The entire event in and of itself is a great story I may tell sometime.

He ended up going back to her about three or four more times (he was the abused one with no self esteem, it happens to guys a good bit more than many would admit), before he finally graduated (he did a one semester victory lap), moved back down here to DFW, and I told him if he went back to her again, I'd whup his ass.

He's now getting a helicopter pilots license, and I shit you not I think she is on her second kid (and she was two years younger than us).

As for my own foibles? I put up with far, far more than I should have with my previous girlfriend in the name of "love", up to the point of me nearly killing myself and going bankrupt pretty hard. However, my current girl is pretty much everything that I see when I think of a loving, healthy relationship, and I don't need to put up with anything.

The way I see it, it isn't love if you have to put up with something.
Modern Outlaws
27-01-2009, 08:00
But having put up with a lot before that, part of it for me was an inability to understand that there could be someone else.

That was the hardest part for me in my last break up. You spend so much time with one person that when it ends, you really feel betrayed, like they took everything you gave them emotionally, told you to fuck off, and then set it on fire for good measure.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 08:02
With me the breaking point was being forced to drive back to Reno from San Fran at 2:30 in the morning.

But having put up with a lot before that, part of it for me was an inability to understand that there could be someone else.

Ugh, bummer.

I hear that Sacramento is beautiful when it's too dark to see anything, though.
Amarenthe
27-01-2009, 08:13
With me the breaking point was being forced to drive back to Reno from San Fran at 2:30 in the morning.

But having put up with a lot before that, part of it for me was an inability to understand that there could be someone else.

That's exactly it, and better than I could have put it. It's the inability to understand that there can be someone else.
Anti-Social Darwinism
27-01-2009, 08:27
My breaking point with my ex-husband came after six years and the realization that I was nothing more than a convenience for him, that he didn't really think of me as a person.

It takes a lot less time and a lot less emotional stress for me to reach my breaking point now - one instance of disrespect and I'm gone.
Heinleinites
27-01-2009, 08:31
What would I do for love...let's see...I'd do anything for love, really. I mean, I'd run to hell and back. I wouldn't lie, though, and that's a fact. The thing about love is, some days it don't come easy, but then, some days it's not that hard. Some days, though, it don't come at all, and those days? They never seem to end.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 08:31
It takes a lot less time and a lot less emotional stress for me to reach my breaking point now - one instance of disrespect and I'm gone.

Yeah, the same thing happened to me, I let one person walk on me and after that they can fuck themselves if they refuse to treat me fairly and honestly.
Lord Tothe
27-01-2009, 08:40
Well that's better than the theory I've heard earlier today. That people who are in love, (and she meant really in love) will endure alot because they love that person, and love makes them into idiots.

Maybe it's my cynical outlook on love, but I believe that love has a limit.

b-b-b-b-but I thought Hollywood movies showed that all relationships could be fixed within 90 minutes no matter what as long as the couple was in love! You've destroyed my belief in humanity! Next thing I know, you'll say Santa, the tooth fairy, and the Easter bunny are all myths!

*edit* OK, I'll be serious. Infidelity or physical abuse would break a relationship.
Luna Amore
27-01-2009, 08:46
b-b-b-b-but I thought Hollywood movies showed that all relationships could be fixed within 90 minutes no matter what as long as the couple was in love! You've destroyed my belief in humanity! Next thing I know, you'll say Santa, the tooth fairy, and the Easter bunny are all myths!

*edit* OK, I'll be serious. Infidelity or physical abuse would break a relationship.Physical/Emotional abuse. Yeah, that would break it.

Infidelity would almost certainly break it. I don't want to say always, because I have a hard time thinking of anything as unshakably unforgivable.
NERVUN
27-01-2009, 09:32
That was the hardest part for me in my last break up. You spend so much time with one person that when it ends, you really feel betrayed, like they took everything you gave them emotionally, told you to fuck off, and then set it on fire for good measure.

That's exactly it, and better than I could have put it. It's the inability to understand that there can be someone else.
It took me a long while to find that out. I actually ended up giving up on the whole thing... and then managed to start dating the woman who would become my wife. ;)

Ugh, bummer.

I hear that Sacramento is beautiful when it's too dark to see anything, though.
Even darkness cannot hide the annoyance that is Sac. Hell, even the heavy fog that followed me all the way up to Auburn didn't help. That was probably the worst trip I've ever had over 80 and Donner.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 09:52
How much would you take from your partner before throwing your hands up and saying "That's it, I'm done"?

Well, I'm treading on thin ice here seeing how I'm currently staying in a relationship I ought to get the hell out of. That being said, in the future, I won't tolerate

- physical abuse
- blatant disrespect
- cheating
- intellectual limitations of a rather noticeable kind
- utter sexual incompatibility
- unkindness
- unappreciativeness
- not feeling loved
- being the only one who puts an effort into the relationship / sacrifices for it
Amarenthe
27-01-2009, 10:39
It took me a long while to find that out. I actually ended up giving up on the whole thing... and then managed to start dating the woman who would become my wife. ;)

Funny, I'm just starting to date a guy... it's the first time I've given myself the chance to think that there might be someone else. =) Here's hoping.
NERVUN
27-01-2009, 10:42
Funny, I'm just starting to date a guy... it's the first time I've given myself the chance to think that there might be someone else. =) Here's hoping.
Good luck to you!
Vetalia
27-01-2009, 10:49
I draw the line at scat.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 11:53
That was probably the worst trip I've ever had over 80 and Donner.

You just gave me an idea for a story.
Dumb Ideologies
27-01-2009, 12:03
To be honest, they're out of there as soon as they demand sex, love, any sign of affection, or expect anything out of the relationship outside of doing my chores and laughing at my awful jokes.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 12:06
To be honest, they're out of there as soon as they demand sex, love, any sign of affection, or expect anything out of the relationship outside of doing my chores and laughing at my awful jokes.Truly, this can only be a subtle and carefully concealed jab at your user name. Good show, sir. Good show indeed! <3
SaintB
27-01-2009, 13:59
Well, I'm treading on thin ice here seeing how I'm currently staying in a relationship I ought to get the hell out of. That being said, in the future, I won't tolerate

- physical abuse
- blatant disrespect
- cheating
- intellectual limitations of a rather noticeable kind
- utter sexual incompatibility
- unkindness
- unappreciativeness
- not feeling loved
- being the only one who puts an effort into the relationship / sacrifices for it

Good for you!

So what are you doing on Saturday :fluffle:

I couldn't pass up the chance to hit on SoWibi.. I have been missing my quota.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:09
Well, I'm treading on thin ice here seeing how I'm currently staying in a relationship I ought to get the hell out of.

Hell, from your descriptions, the bad sex alone woulda gotten me out of there months ago..
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 14:10
Good for you!

So what are you doing on Saturday :fluffle:

You'll laugh, but.. "relationship day". You know, the day we spend (theoretically - it's never quite worked so far) just with each other.

I couldn't pass up the chance to hit on SoWibi.. I have been missing my quota.
Indeedy. I feel all neglected. But that's okay, that makes it like my RL relationship and thus feels comfortably like home.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 14:11
Hell, from your descriptions, the bad sex alone woulda gotten me out of there months ago..

Oh, I'm not *that* superficial! ....

.. and I've gotten myself some superb solo sex toys a while ago. ;P
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:12
I'm just wondering what "utter sexual incompatibility" could possibly be. In my experience, generally things fit together. Like a horrifying, heart-pounding, loud, confusing, viscous puzzle.
Katganistan
27-01-2009, 14:12
An ex cheated. Once. I said, "You like her so much, I'll make the choice easy for you."

My fiance and I are a much better couple. We both have our faults, but not being able to trust each other is not one of them.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 14:14
I'm just wondering what "utter sexual incompatibility" could possibly be. In my experience, generally things fit together. Like a horrifying, heart-pounding, loud, confusing, viscous puzzle.

Like when you want sex daily, and he only once a month, if you're lucky. Like when you want the lights on and lots of admiring and feeling the other person's body, while he wants a quick dark fuck without caressing. Such things.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 14:16
I'm just wondering what "utter sexual incompatibility" could possibly be. In my experience, generally things fit together. Like a horrifying, heart-pounding, loud, confusing, viscous puzzle.

Its basically one person does not have a high enough libido, or is just in to really puritan sex and the other enjoys sex, likes to experiment, and and enjoys just being with their lover. Or something like that.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:18
Ah! You're Word 2008 and he's Notepad. You are the .docx to his .txt.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 14:19
You'll laugh, but.. "relationship day". You know, the day we spend (theoretically - it's never quite worked so far) just with each other.


What about Sunday? :cool:


Indeedy. I feel all neglected. But that's okay, that makes it like my RL relationship and thus feels comfortably like home.

Now I feel like a criminal. I don't know that I could apologize enough... or maybe there is something we could work out ;).
SaintB
27-01-2009, 14:19
Ah! You're Word 2008 and he's Notepad. You are the .docx to his .txt.

Nice comparison mate. 2 points!
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:20
Like when you want sex daily, and he only once a month, if you're lucky. Like when you want the lights on and lots of admiring and feeling the other person's body, while he wants a quick dark fuck without caressing. Such things.

what is WRONG with this guy?
Sdaeriji
27-01-2009, 14:20
I have no idea, but I suspect I'm close. If I reach a breaking point, I'll let you know what caused it.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:21
Ah! You're Word 2008 and he's Notepad. You are the .docx to his .txt.

you're are the inquisition to his CSM!

.....

sorry.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 14:21
what is WRONG with this guy?

You and I both asked the same question months ago.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 14:23
What about Sunday? :cool:

Umm. Day at his parents', I suppose... but the night I'd be free ;P

Now I feel like a criminal. I don't know that I could apologize enough... or maybe there is something we could work out ;).
You better think & work hard. I've expectations now.
what is WRONG with this guy?
If I knew... better ask what is right. That's less likely to break the screen.
Vetalia
27-01-2009, 14:23
what is WRONG with this guy?

Once a month? I didn't even think that was possible...
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:24
you're are the inquisition to his CSM!

.....

sorry.Well, I don't know if one intended to kill the other one in bed with a flamethrower, but I'll let it slide. ;)
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:25
Well, I don't know if one intended to kill the other one in bed with a flamethrower, but I'll let it slide. ;)

I was thinking more of a big fucking hammer.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 14:25
you're are the inquisition to his CSM!

.....

sorry.

Excuse me, lawyers in catsuits cannot speak for me, the ONE and ONLY Inquisition. Tremble in fear!!!:mad:
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:25
Umm. Day at his parents', I suppose... but the night I'd be free ;P


You better think & work hard. I've expectations now.

If I knew... better ask what is right. That's less likely to break the screen.

so why are you still, you know, there?

I've mentioned before, but this doesn't seem like the kinda person you wanna test the "maybe I'm not a lesbian..." theory on.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:26
Excuse me, lawyers in catsuits cannot speak for me, the ONE and ONLY Inquisition. Tremble in fear!!!:mad:

wrong inquisition sweetie. But I'm shaking...really.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 14:29
wrong inquisition sweetie. But I'm shaking...really.

Awww, you are so tender on ocassion. :p

*scurries away*
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:31
Awww, don't feel left out Nana!

This guy:

Inquisitor Lord Torquemada Coteaz of the Imperial Inquisition
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3147/2401290487_0f83a6a9d2.jpg?v=0

The armor and the bird would definitely make sex interesting though. Though to quote VGCats "It's like having sex with a tank".
SaintB
27-01-2009, 14:32
Umm. Day at his parents', I suppose... but the night I'd be free ;P


Well I get off of work at midnight :)


You better think & work hard. I've expectations now.


Excellent! I don't so I'm ready for anything :fluffle:
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 14:33
This guy:

Inquisitor Lord Torquemada Coteaz of the Imperial Inquisition
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3147/2401290487_0f83a6a9d2.jpg?v=0

The armor and the bird would definitely make sex interesting though. Though to quote VGCats "It's like having sex with a tank".

That or sexing a hybrid between an Inquisitor and an angry samurai. Kinky!
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:34
Awww, don't feel left out Nana!

This guy:

Inquisitor Lord Torquemada Coteaz of the Imperial Inquisition

The Inquisition! (What a show!)
The Inquisition (here we go!)
We know you're wishing that we'd go away!
But the Inquisition's here and it's here to -()
(Hey Torquemada, whaddya say?) I just got back from the auto de fe
Auto de fe? What's an auto de fe?
It's what you oughtn't to do but you do anyway
Skit skat n'voole-vat n'doodle-dy day!

Will you convert? (No no no no)
Will you confess? (No no no no)
Will you revert? (No no no no)
Will you say yes? (No no no no)

Now I asked in a nice way, I said pretty please.
I bent their ears now I'll work on their knees

Hey Torquemada, walk this way. We got a little game that you might wanna play
So pull that handle, try your luck...Who knows Torq, you might win a buck!
Alright!

Put it in the car (In the car... In the car...)

How we doing, any converts today? (Not a one. Nay nay nay)
We've flattened their fingers, we've branded their buns!
Nothing is working...Send in the nuns!

Oy!

The Inquisition...what a show!
The Inquisition...here we go!
We know you're wishing that we'd go away!
So come on you Muslims and you Jews
We got big news for all of you's
You better change your point of views today!
'Cause the Inquisition's here and it's here...to...stay!
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:35
That or sexing a hybrid between an Inquisitor and an angry samurai. Kinky!

hmm, inquisitors are less "samurai" more....crazy dude in cybernetic armor.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 14:37
hmm, inquisitors are less "samurai" more....crazy dude in cybernetic armor.

That too.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:38
Occasionally they're missing limbs and floating around in gravity-neutral fields, destroying things with their minds.

Actually, given how often these guys get stabbed, shot, bludgeoned, possessed and declared excommunicate traitoris...replace "occasionally" with "eventually".

But there are Sensei! They're the sterile children of the God-Emperor of Mankind.

I believe that we grind them up into ammunition.

No, I'm not kidding.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:39
Occasionally they're missing limbs and floating around in gravity-neutral fields, destroying things with their minds.

Actually, given how often these guys get stabbed, shot, bludgeoned, possessed and declared excommunicate traitoris...replace "occasionally" with "eventually".

But there are Sensei! They're the sterile children of the God-Emperor of Mankind.

I believe that we grind them up into ammunition.

No, I'm not kidding.

their bones make our bullets! (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IAmNotMakingThisUp)
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 14:41
Occasionally they're missing limbs and floating around in gravity-neutral fields, destroying things with their minds.

Actually, given how often these guys get stabbed, shot, bludgeoned, possessed and declared excommunicate traitoris...replace "occasionally" with "eventually".

But there are Sensei! They're the sterile children of the God-Emperor of Mankind.

I believe that we grind them up into ammunition.

No, I'm not kidding.

*now does scurries away*:eek:
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:43
Shit Neo Art, I can't possibly counter that. Well played.

Goodbye, cruel world.
New Wallonochia
27-01-2009, 14:43
I draw the line at scat.

Yeah, even Ella Fitzgerald (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbL9vr4Q2LU) doing scat doesn't do it for me and normally I love her singing.

edit:

Occasionally they're missing limbs and floating around in gravity-neutral fields, destroying things with their minds.

Actually, given how often these guys get stabbed, shot, bludgeoned, possessed and declared excommunicate traitoris...replace "occasionally" with "eventually".

But there are Sensei! They're the sterile children of the God-Emperor of Mankind.

I believe that we grind them up into ammunition.

No, I'm not kidding.

I never liked the whole Starchild/Sensei thing.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 14:51
I never liked the whole Starchild/Sensei thing.Well, since 4th Edition it's apparently canon again, albeit a lot more mysterious.

The one thing I can't stand about Warhammer is how little of the fluff "sticks". We've got this huge, stagnating universe where nothing gets resolved, and given how well GW makes money there's no end in sight.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 14:56
Well, since 4th Edition it's apparently canon again, albeit a lot more mysterious.

The one thing I can't stand about Warhammer is how little of the fluff "sticks". We've got this huge, stagnating universe where nothing gets resolved, and given how well GW makes money there's no end in sight.

seriously, it's been 999M41 for how long now?
New Wallonochia
27-01-2009, 14:59
Well, since 4th Edition it's apparently canon again, albeit a lot more mysterious.

The one thing I can't stand about Warhammer is how little of the fluff "sticks". We've got this huge, stagnating universe where nothing gets resolved, and given how well GW makes money there's no end in sight.

I rather like that there's not much change or an end in sight. If they tried to somehow bring resolution or closure to the storyline I can't help but think they'd crap it all up. For a similar reason I don't like the Horus Heresy novels, I'd have preferred that it were left as myth and legend.

That said I enjoyed reading several of the novels, but I just don't like the idea of them.
H N Fiddlebottoms VIII
27-01-2009, 15:06
If she insults my cooking, it is time for her to go into the oven.
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 15:43
I rather like that there's not much change or an end in sight. If they tried to somehow bring resolution or closure to the storyline I can't help but think they'd crap it all up. For a similar reason I don't like the Horus Heresy novels, I'd have preferred that it were left as myth and legend.

That said I enjoyed reading several of the novels, but I just don't like the idea of them.I completely understand that, but it's not even closure I'm really looking for, just change. The last major campaign I took part in was the 13th Black Crusade a few years ago, and in the end Games Workshop just said "Well, Chaos sorta won, but then the fleet showed up and everything went back to normal". The last time I felt that the lore really "stuck" was with the Third War for Armageddon, although admittedly Games Workshop's campaigns since then have been rather general.

Hell, the entire "Sergeant Lysander -> Captain Lysander" was as huge a change as anything we've seen in a while.

I haven't read much of the Horus Heresy, but I hear it's a very well-written series. Gaunt's Ghosts are more my speed, since Mr. Abnett has done an awesome job of writing out a definitive backstory behind the Sabbat World Crusade.

And Neo Art: I agree. If this much stuff has happened every year for the last 10,000 years, I'm surprised that the Imperium hasn't simply *poofed* out of existence.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 15:51
hmmm ive been married for 25 years....

it would take something....critical, immediate, overwhelmingly necessary...for me to leave him.

otherwise i would just bide my time and kill him in a way that wouldnt be suspect.
RhynoD
27-01-2009, 15:52
http://www.leasticoulddo.com/comic/20090127
Ancient and Holy Terra
27-01-2009, 15:59
That art looks familiar, but I can't place it...Webcomic?
Mad hatters in jeans
27-01-2009, 16:10
I'd run right into hell and back
but i won't do that, no i won't do that anything for love something something you've been dreaming of but i won't do that, no i won't do....etc add in piano.
Depends on who it is.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 16:19
I'd run right into hell and back
but i won't do that, no i won't do that anything for love something something you've been dreaming of but i won't do that, no i won't do....etc add in piano.
Depends on who it is.
dont you wonder just what it is that meatloaf wont do for love?

dismember her ex? go into massive debt to buy her jewelry, cars and furs? give his dog away?

what is it that he wont do?
Dumb Ideologies
27-01-2009, 16:20
dont you wonder just what it is that meatloaf wont do for love?

dismember her ex? go into massive debt to buy her jewelry, cars and furs? give his dog away?

what is it that he wont do?

Write a decent song? :p
Mad hatters in jeans
27-01-2009, 16:25
dont you wonder just what it is that meatloaf wont do for love?

dismember her ex? go into massive debt to buy her jewelry, cars and furs? give his dog away?

what is it that he wont do?
i suppose leave his lover forever would be the romantic thing, or have to go off to fight a war i guess.
Write a decent song? :p
lolz, okay you try it and tell me how it goes, songs are pretty tought to write. at least the good ones are.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 16:29
Write a decent song? :p
*slap*

dont dis meatloaf.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 16:30
i suppose leave his lover forever would be the romantic thing, or have to go off to fight a war i guess.

ya but unless you are in victorian england you dont go off to war "for love"
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:35
dont you wonder just what it is that meatloaf wont do for love?

dismember her ex? go into massive debt to buy her jewelry, cars and furs? give his dog away?

what is it that he wont do?

http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/I%27d-Do-Anything-For-Love-But-I-Won%27t-Do-That-lyrics-Meat-Loaf/B3269685657B22F048256BDD002FD152

There are the lyrics, perhaps its in there? (I couldn't tell)
Ryadn
27-01-2009, 16:35
I thought this was going to answer the age-old question of what it was exactly Meatloaf wouldn't do. :( It drives me nuts!
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:35
I thought this was going to answer the age-old question of what it was exactly Meatloaf wouldn't do. :( It drives me nuts!

See the above post... perhaps if all the great minds on NSG get together we can divine the answer!
Ryadn
27-01-2009, 16:37
See the above post... perhaps if all the great minds on NSG get together we can divine the answer!

My guess: have a threesome with another guy.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 16:39
http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/I%27d-Do-Anything-For-Love-But-I-Won%27t-Do-That-lyrics-Meat-Loaf/B3269685657B22F048256BDD002FD152

There are the lyrics, perhaps its in there? (I couldn't tell)
ive never seen it in there.

i assume its something sexual.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:39
My guess: have a threesome with another guy.

I don't think I would do that either.
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 16:40
My guess: have a threesome with another guy.
i was thinking "i have this sex toy modeled after my ex boyfriend and we could....."
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 16:40
Well I get off of work at midnight :)
RL edit: Asshat just called to say he's taken on a job on Saturday. Wonder how I could have believed for a whole whopping 17 hours that he'd actually make good on the Saturday-promise for once. *slaps self*
Excellent! I don't so I'm ready for anything :fluffle:
Goodie. Remember I want to be pampered, showered with attention, and shown real lust for me.
dont you wonder just what it is that meatloaf wont do for love?

dismember her ex? go into massive debt to buy her jewelry, cars and furs? give his dog away?

what is it that he wont do?

Seriously? Like, really? Maybe it's just because I'm ESL and don't get it right, but.. I always thought it was crystal clear in the lyrics: He won't do the one thing his girl is accusing him of going to do in the future: Sleep around. He'll do anything for 'love', but he'll not go as far as seek 'love' anywhere else but with her....

... really, I never thought there was any doubt about it. Am I being weird, mor are you all being stupid?
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:41
I know the territory, I've been around,
It'll all turn to dust and we'll all fall down,
Sooner or later, you'll be screwing around.

I won't do that. No, I won't do that.

You know, you girls could be right...
VirginiaCooper
27-01-2009, 16:42
There is a direct relationship between the quality of the sex and the amount of time I will endure a woman.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 16:43
You know, you girls could be right...

We are ALWAYS right.;)
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:44
RL edit: Asshat just called to say he's taken on a job on Saturday. Wonder how I could have believed for a whole whopping 17 hours that he'd actually make good on the Saturday-promise for once. *slaps self*

I can tell my friends to go to hell :p


Goodie. Remember I want to be pampered,
Check
showered with attention,
Check
and shown real lust for me.
Dare I say... no problem there.



Seriously? Like, really? Maybe it's just because I'm ESL and don't get it right, but.. I always thought it was crystal clear in the lyrics: He won't do the one thing his girl is accusing him of going to do in the future: Sleep around. He'll do anything for 'love', but he'll not go as far as seek 'love' anywhere else but with her....

... really, I never thought there was any doubt about it. Am I being weird, mor are you all being stupid?

You are truly one of the modern philosophers.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 16:45
Goodie. Remember I want to be pampered, showered with attention, and shown real lust for me.

sure, but you have to get naked first.
Mad hatters in jeans
27-01-2009, 16:48
ya but unless you are in victorian england you dont go off to war "for love"

But if you lived in Gaza maybe you would, or some other godforsaken rock on this planet.
I don't know you got any ideas?
SaintB
27-01-2009, 16:48
We are ALWAYS right.;)

Oh yes, I have to keep reminding myself...
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 17:12
I can tell my friends to go to hell :p
No, don't. I'm not the kind to complain about being stood up, only to then make somebody else stand up their folks in order to make newly-free me happy.


Check

Check

Dare I say... no problem there.
Veeery good.

You are truly one of the modern philosophers.
Thanks. So that's what my perfect marks on my philosophy diploma meant. ;P

sure, but you have to get naked first.
Get? I? I was planning on the guy in question to get me naked, TTBT.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 17:15
Get? I? I was planning on the guy in question to get me naked, TTBT.

ahh, also a perfectly viable option.

Now, how to get you naked...hmm....
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 17:17
Now, how to get you naked...hmm....

What are you wondering? Where is your difficulty?
Neesika
27-01-2009, 17:18
Well, I compromised a lot in my last relationship, and I put up with things I swore would be deal breakers (physical abuse [albiet only once], emotional/verbal abuse, cheating [with STIs!] etc). Now that I've finally gotten myself out of that situation, I would not accept any of those things. I demand, and will provide honesty...dishonesty would destroy my trust, and that is not something I think that could be repaired.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 17:20
No, don't. I'm not the kind to complain about being stood up, only to then make somebody else stand up their folks in order to make newly-free me happy.


They'd do the same to me! Really we only spend weekends out as a group because we have nothing else to do.


Veeery good.


I specialize in those.


Get? I? I was planning on the guy in question to get me naked, TTBT.

Its days like this I curse my low income.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 17:22
Well, I compromised a lot in my last relationship, and I put up with things I swore would be deal breakers (physical abuse [albiet only once], emotional/verbal abuse, cheating [with STIs!] etc). Now that I've finally gotten myself out of that situation, I would not accept any of those things.
See, that's one of the things I hope to put under the "positive aspects" lists of having had this bucket full of crap of a relationship: I'm only 22, and I've learnt early, quick and hard to not put up with such crap (again). It's fantastic, seen from that side, that he's crap on so many levels, this means I only have to go through this one fucked up relationship to learn to steadfastly avoid a whole ass full of stuff.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 17:23
Oh yes, I have to keep reminding myself...

And is good and well that you do. :p
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 17:25
I specialize in those.
Sounds promising. Cam one order you in bulk to have one handy whenever the need strikes? You sound like a good investment.

It's days like this I curse my low income.
Don't curse your low income, curse your strategically unwise location. Money'd be no problem if you were to move into the apartment next door, which has just become available. (In fact, you'd have to have a low income if you anted to move in there 'cuz it's reserved for uni students)
Neesika
27-01-2009, 17:28
See, that's one of the things I hope to put under the "positive aspects" lists of having had this bucket full of crap of a relationship: I'm only 22, and I've learnt early, quick and hard to not put up with such crap (again). It's fantastic, seen from that side, that he's crap on so many levels, this means I only have to go through this one fucked up relationship to learn to steadfastly avoid a whole ass full of stuff.

I agree. I think it was important to go through so much shit, because I am absolutely certain at this point what is NOT okay. I have a much better idea of what I want out of a relationship and what I want to put into it. More than anything, I understand just how important communication really is.
SaintB
27-01-2009, 17:28
Sounds promising. Cam one order you in bulk to have one handy whenever the need strikes? You sound like a good investment.

I'm technically already in bulk (fat joke alert)


Don't curse your low income, curse your strategically unwise location. Money'd be no problem if you were to move into the apartment next door, which has just become available. (In fact, you'd have to have a low income if you anted to move in there 'cuz it's reserved for uni students)

I have been thinking about going back to college... I'd need someone to teach me the language...
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 17:41
Where is your difficulty?

currently, the atlantic.
Megaloria
27-01-2009, 17:47
Last relationship I was in I quit after about a month because she was delusional. Like, seeing ghosts everywhere delusional.
Smunkeeville
27-01-2009, 18:09
Abuse or serious legal trouble that affects me would be a time to leave.

The abuse also covers the children.
Neesika
27-01-2009, 18:12
currently, the atlantic.

A mere puddle, oh Mr. Lawyer Bucks!
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 18:13
A mere puddle, oh Mr. Lawyer Bucks!

yeah yeah, like I have time for weekend gettaways to Europe. Besides, if I were to go anywhere, it'd be more inward to the depths of the midwest.
Neesika
27-01-2009, 18:18
yeah yeah, like I have time for weekend gettaways to Europe. Besides, if I were to go anywhere, it'd be more inward to the depths of the midwest.

Awwwww....

Also, you're doing it wrong. What's the point of making the big lawyer bucks if you never have time to enjoy them?
Sdaeriji
27-01-2009, 18:20
See, that's one of the things I hope to put under the "positive aspects" lists of having had this bucket full of crap of a relationship: I'm only 22, and I've learnt early, quick and hard to not put up with such crap (again). It's fantastic, seen from that side, that he's crap on so many levels, this means I only have to go through this one fucked up relationship to learn to steadfastly avoid a whole ass full of stuff.

Yeah, you'd think that a relationship like that would teach you to avoid them in the future.
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 18:40
I'm technically already in bulk (fat joke alert)
As long as your social, emotional and sexual qualities also come in bulk, I could possibly care less, but only about such things like whether you take off the left or right sock first.

I have been thinking about going back to college... I'd need someone to teach me the language...
That's okay, I can show you oral communication quite well.

currently, the atlantic.

Oh, you're not in possession of transatlantic telekinetic de-dressing skills? Disappointing.

Yeah, you'd think that a relationship like that would teach you to avoid them in the future.
You've got evidence to the contrary?
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 19:38
Oh, you're not in possession of transatlantic telekinetic de-dressing skills? Disappointing.

don't tempt me to try :p
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 19:51
don't tempt me to try :p

Oh, by all means, do try! The boyfriend will only be back by 11pm GMT -1 (that leaves you about three hours), and even that's no real limit 'cause I'm betting you he isn't going to try anyhow.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 19:52
Oh, by all means, do try! The boyfriend will only be back by 11pm GMT -1 (that leaves you about three hours), and even that's no real limit 'cause I'm betting you he isn't going to try anyhow.

what, and give away my secrets in public? I spent YEARS refining my technique :p
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 19:57
what, and give away my secrets in public? I spent YEARS refining my technique :p

Look, I want you to undress me, not to undress me and also teleport a little memo detailing how you did it on top of the discarded pile. You do your stuff, I don't care how, I inform NSG of your powers, you're the hero, I'm undressed, your secret's kept, everyone's happy.

Yes?
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 19:59
Look, I want you to undress me, not to undress me and also teleport a little memo detailing how you did it on top of the discarded pile. You do your stuff, I don't care how, I inform NSG of your powers, you're the hero, I'm undressed, your secret's kept, everyone's happy.

Yes?

yes yes, but you can inform them AFTER the fact, I don't want everyone learning how I got you there :p

edit: semi related, check your TGs
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 20:08
yes yes, but you can inform them AFTER the fact, I don't want everyone learning how I got you there :p

edit: semi related, check your TGs

Replied. Also, can't you, like, write things in white in the thread, or, dunno, do that visitor message thing or something? I'm too exhausted to actually keep the NS tab open and active on top of this one. *nods*
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 20:09
Replied. Also, can't you, like, write things in white in the thread, or, dunno, do that visitor message thing or something? I'm too exhausted to actually keep the NS tab open and active on top of this one. *nods*

frankly, if you're not going to put any effort into this, I hardly see why I should bother :tongue:

And replied back.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-01-2009, 20:15
I just recieved this from a good friend:

"One can love and not be happy; one can be happy and not love; but to be able to love and be happy is prodigious."

Honoré de Balzac
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 20:20
frankly, if you're not going to put any effort into this, I hardly see why I should bother :tongue:


You appear to have missed the important lesson in life that one always bothers with everything for a lady who's willing to drop her pants and bend over anywhere, anytime.

Also, replied, of course.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 20:23
You appear to have missed the important lesson in life that one always bothers with everything for a lady who's willing to drop her pants and bend over anywhere, anytime.

Also, replied, of course.

...ok, you've got my attention.

back at ya

and white text be damned!
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:18
Its times like this I have to seriously resist the urge to give some kind of inspirational speech.

EDIT: Oh, and what was the breaking point? Since its part of the OP.

It's rather hard to say. In the end, it was kinda him who dumped me, but he dumped me largely because I made it clear I was going to call him on at least SOME of his shit from then on, and he wasn't interested in having either to stop being a scumbag or listen to me cry about it nonstop. (Plus, of course, there was the Barely Legal Teen he was cheating on me with at that point, who was, according to him, "superior to [me] in every way," so it wasn't exactly a big sacrifice on his part. :rolleyes: )

I have higher standards now, thank goodness.
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:21
Seriously? Like, really? Maybe it's just because I'm ESL and don't get it right, but.. I always thought it was crystal clear in the lyrics: He won't do the one thing his girl is accusing him of going to do in the future: Sleep around. He'll do anything for 'love', but he'll not go as far as seek 'love' anywhere else but with her....

... really, I never thought there was any doubt about it. Am I being weird, mor are you all being stupid?

Nah, I was always pretty sure that's what it meant, too.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 21:22
I have higher standards now, thank goodness.

oh :(
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 21:24
RL edit: Asshat just called to say he's taken on a job on Saturday. Wonder how I could have believed for a whole whopping 17 hours that he'd actually make good on the Saturday-promise for once. *slaps self*

Goodie. Remember I want to be pampered, showered with attention, and shown real lust for me.


Seriously? Like, really? Maybe it's just because I'm ESL and don't get it right, but.. I always thought it was crystal clear in the lyrics: He won't do the one thing his girl is accusing him of going to do in the future: Sleep around. He'll do anything for 'love', but he'll not go as far as seek 'love' anywhere else but with her....

... really, I never thought there was any doubt about it. Am I being weird, mor are you all being stupid?
how is sleeping around doing anything for love?
Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 21:26
I just recieved this from a good friend:

"One can love and not be happy; one can be happy and not love; but to be able to love and be happy is prodigious."

Honoré de Balzac

Hmm, good point by Balzac.
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:28
yeah yeah, like I have time for weekend gettaways to Europe. Besides, if I were to go anywhere, it'd be more inward to the depths of the midwest.

Interesting. Why's that? ;)
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 21:29
Interesting. Why's that? ;)

I have a thing for corn.
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:37
oh :(

It's true! No guy I date is allowed to

- sexually assault me AND
- generally ignore what I want, including ignoring safewords AND
- find it sexually arousing to make me cry in a bad way AND
- cheat on me repeatedly
- ...including with a girl whose name he never even knew and with whom he didn't even wear a fucking condom
- ...and with a girl who'd turned 18 literal days before
- ...and with a girl he'd specifically shoved in my face years ago as being "better than me" AND
- hit me in anger AND
- tell me at great length how I'm really not particularly attractive or lovable, and that I'm just terribly lucky he puts up with me AND
- find it amusing when his family members say friendly things to me like, "The world would be better if you didn't exist," or "You're not fit to pass on your genes, let alone to MY grandchildren" AND
- regularly publicly disavow having anything to do with me
- ET FREAKING CETERA

...at this point, guys are limited to no more than three or four of those apiece.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 21:38
It's true! No guy I date is allowed to

- sexually assault me AND
- generally ignore what I want, including ignoring safewords AND
- find it sexually arousing to make me cry in a bad way AND
- cheat on me repeatedly
- ...including with a girl whose name he never even knew and with whom he didn't even wear a fucking condom
- ...and with a girl who'd turned 18 literal days before
- ...and with a girl he'd specifically shoved in my face years ago as being "better than me" AND
- hit me in anger AND
- tell me at great length how I'm really not particularly attractive or lovable, and that I'm just terribly lucky he puts up with me AND
- find it amusing when his family members say friendly things to me like, "The world would be better if you didn't exist," or "You're not fit to pass on your genes, let alone to MY grandchildren" AND
- regularly publicly disavow having anything to do with me
- ET FREAKING CETERA

...at this point, guys are limited to no more than three or four of those apiece.

picky bitch. Also, check TGs.

Edit: and I have to laugh at the whole list of disclamers. "make me cry..in a bad way". "hit me...in anger". We're strange people, aren't we dear?
SoWiBi
27-01-2009, 21:39
Nah, I was always pretty sure that's what it meant, too.
I wonder whether it's us girls actually paying attention to what the girl has on her mind, whereas the guys here kinda tune out when she opens her mouth and wonder why the guy never explains himself properly... (this is, of course, blatantly disregarding the females who said they'd no clue so that my awesome theory shan't crash).
how is sleeping around doing anything for love?
You might notice how I've taken great care to wrap 'love' into those sweet little comforting quotation marks at all times.
And, you know, some people actually do try to find love via sex, and do try to find the love they might feel to not get enough of from their partner via sleeping around.
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:40
I have a thing for corn.

Pity. It's mostly wheat and soybeans around where I live, so I guess you'll have to go to Iowa. :tongue:
Ashmoria
27-01-2009, 21:41
You might notice how I've taken great care to wrap 'love' into those sweet little comforting quotation marks at all times.
And, you know, some people actually do try to find love via sex, and do try to find the love they might feel to not get enough of from their partner via sleeping around.
yeah

i didnt get that from the song.
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 21:41
I wonder whether it's us girls actually paying attention to what the girl has on her mind, whereas the guys here kinda tune out when she opens her mouth and wonder why the guy never explains himself properly... (this is, of course, blatantly disregarding the females who said they'd no clue so that my awesome theory shan't crash).

You might notice how I've taken great care to wrap 'love' into those sweet little comforting quotation marks at all times.
And, you know, some people actually do try to find love via sex, and do try to find the love they might feel to not get enough of from their partner via sleeping around.

I disagree with it for the reason Ash said. "pretty soon you'll be sleeping around" "no I wouldn't do that for love".

It's incongruous.
Wilgrove
27-01-2009, 21:44
Why do all of my threads end up with Neo trying to arrange a threesome? :(
Neo Art
27-01-2009, 21:44
Why do all of my threads end up with Neo trying to arrange a threesome? :(

I wasn't trying to arrange one. I just wouldn't be opposed if it happened.

And besides, it's an improvement to your typical threads :tongue:
Poliwanacraca
27-01-2009, 21:46
picky bitch. Also, check TGs.

Edit: and I have to laugh at the whole list of disclamers. "make me cry..in a bad way". "hit me...in anger". We're strange people, aren't we dear?

Just a bit. They're key distinctions, seeing as I'd rather not rule out perfectly lovely guys who smack me around affectionately! ;)

And replied.
Tahar Joblis
27-01-2009, 23:38
IMO, this whole thing is linked to how people identify themselves. People who identify themselves based on who they date have a problem when it comes to abusive relationships, because the relationship is part of who they are.
Katganistan
28-01-2009, 01:34
http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/I%27d-Do-Anything-For-Love-But-I-Won%27t-Do-That-lyrics-Meat-Loaf/B3269685657B22F048256BDD002FD152

There are the lyrics, perhaps its in there? (I couldn't tell)
Read the first the first time he says it, and the conversation between the girl and boy.

He won't betray her and leave her.
Ashmoria
28-01-2009, 01:44
Read the first the first time he says it, and the conversation between the girl and boy.

He won't betray her and leave her.
you dont betray your lover for love.
NERVUN
28-01-2009, 01:46
Why do all of my threads end up with Neo trying to arrange a threesome? :(
You just got to remember to keep a bucket of cold water handy to throw on them when you start your thread, that's all. :tongue:
Poliwanacraca
28-01-2009, 03:12
you dont betray your lover for love.

Well, at least Meatloaf doesn't. :tongue:
Geniasis
28-01-2009, 03:13
It's true! No guy I date is allowed to

- sexually assault me AND
- generally ignore what I want, including ignoring safewords AND
- find it sexually arousing to make me cry in a bad way AND
- cheat on me repeatedly
- ...including with a girl whose name he never even knew and with whom he didn't even wear a fucking condom
- ...and with a girl who'd turned 18 literal days before
- ...and with a girl he'd specifically shoved in my face years ago as being "better than me" AND
- hit me in anger AND
- tell me at great length how I'm really not particularly attractive or lovable, and that I'm just terribly lucky he puts up with me AND
- find it amusing when his family members say friendly things to me like, "The world would be better if you didn't exist," or "You're not fit to pass on your genes, let alone to MY grandchildren" AND
- regularly publicly disavow having anything to do with me
- ET FREAKING CETERA

...at this point, guys are limited to no more than three or four of those apiece.

Way to take all the fun right out of the relationship. :tongue:

But seriously though, this is pretty good criteria. Though I have to ask, what if "you're lucky I put up with you" is in a sort of teasing sense?
Poliwanacraca
28-01-2009, 03:33
Way to take all the fun right out of the relationship. :tongue:

But seriously though, this is pretty good criteria. Though I have to ask, what if "you're lucky I put up with you" is in a sort of teasing sense?

Oh, that's perfectly fine. Teasing is fun. Actually having someone who's supposed to love you telling you that you're worthless is not.
Knights of Liberty
28-01-2009, 04:57
It's true! No guy I date is allowed to

- sexually assault me AND
- generally ignore what I want, including ignoring safewords AND
- find it sexually arousing to make me cry in a bad way AND
- cheat on me repeatedly
- ...including with a girl whose name he never even knew and with whom he didn't even wear a fucking condom
- ...and with a girl who'd turned 18 literal days before
- ...and with a girl he'd specifically shoved in my face years ago as being "better than me" AND
- hit me in anger AND
- tell me at great length how I'm really not particularly attractive or lovable, and that I'm just terribly lucky he puts up with me AND
- find it amusing when his family members say friendly things to me like, "The world would be better if you didn't exist," or "You're not fit to pass on your genes, let alone to MY grandchildren" AND
- regularly publicly disavow having anything to do with me
- ET FREAKING CETERA

...at this point, guys are limited to no more than three or four of those apiece.


............

Did this guy get hit by a bus yet?
Neesika
28-01-2009, 04:58
............

Did this guy get hit by a bus yet?
That'd restore my faith in humanity a bit...but I suspect that like most such individuals, he's moved on to a new victim.
Poliwanacraca
28-01-2009, 05:01
............

Did this guy get hit by a bus yet?

Not as of a week or two ago, which was the last time I received (unwanted) news of him.

Apparently he's grown a really ugly beard, though. Which is something, I guess?
SaintB
28-01-2009, 07:57
As long as your social, emotional and sexual qualities also come in bulk, I could possibly care less, but only about such things like whether you take off the left or right sock first.

Well NSG is pretty good proof of my social and emotional qualities, and I wouldn't shy at showing you my other ones. As for socks, I just take off whatever one I reach for first.


That's okay, I can show you oral communication quite well.


I do think I might need practice after all this time.
SaintB
28-01-2009, 08:06
It's rather hard to say. In the end, it was kinda him who dumped me, but he dumped me largely because I made it clear I was going to call him on at least SOME of his shit from then on, and he wasn't interested in having either to stop being a scumbag or listen to me cry about it nonstop. (Plus, of course, there was the Barely Legal Teen he was cheating on me with at that point, who was, according to him, "superior to [me] in every way," so it wasn't exactly a big sacrifice on his part. :rolleyes: )

I have higher standards now, thank goodness.

Excellent, as long as one doesn't mind looks I always try to be that higher standard, maybe I got the slightest chance in hell after all!

It's true! No guy I date is allowed to

- sexually assault me AND
- generally ignore what I want, including ignoring safewords AND
- find it sexually arousing to make me cry in a bad way AND
- cheat on me repeatedly
- ...including with a girl whose name he never even knew and with whom he didn't even wear a fucking condom
- ...and with a girl who'd turned 18 literal days before
- ...and with a girl he'd specifically shoved in my face years ago as being "better than me" AND
- hit me in anger AND
- tell me at great length how I'm really not particularly attractive or lovable, and that I'm just terribly lucky he puts up with me AND
- find it amusing when his family members say friendly things to me like, "The world would be better if you didn't exist," or "You're not fit to pass on your genes, let alone to MY grandchildren" AND
- regularly publicly disavow having anything to do with me
- ET FREAKING CETERA

...at this point, guys are limited to no more than three or four of those apiece.

o.o

I am definitely a higher standard than that.

Not as of a week or two ago, which was the last time I received (unwanted) news of him.

Apparently he's grown a really ugly beard, though. Which is something, I guess?

I know some bus drivers, I might be able to arrange something?

*disclaimer this is not particularly about how he has treated Poli but more about how I think he treats people in general.*
Amor Pulchritudo
28-01-2009, 09:12
I think I'm finding more and more that there needs to be a definite "breaking point". You can't just get angry at the smallest things, and you certainly can't put up with the big things. My breaking point now? I think it would be incompatible ideologies that impact life choices. Either one has to back down, or you need to break up.

I'm not sure, lots of people (seemingly women more often; no offense intended) will stay in a horrible or one sided relationship for what seems an inordinate amount of time, and some people will even endure things getting worse for the sake of keeping it.

I think both genders do it, but perhaps men don't speak out about it as much. After all, there's men who put up with verbally abusive women, but maybe they just say she "nags" or "bitches".

What would I do for love...let's see...I'd do anything for love, really. I mean, I'd run to hell and back. I wouldn't lie, though, and that's a fact. The thing about love is, some days it don't come easy, but then, some days it's not that hard. Some days, though, it don't come at all, and those days? They never seem to end.

Relevance = ?

Well, I'm treading on thin ice here seeing how I'm currently staying in a relationship I ought to get the hell out of. That being said, in the future, I won't tolerate

- physical abuse
- blatant disrespect
- cheating
- intellectual limitations of a rather noticeable kind
- utter sexual incompatibility
- unkindness
- unappreciativeness
- not feeling loved
- being the only one who puts an effort into the relationship / sacrifices for it

I most definitely wouldn't tolerate the first one. I think I have tolerated a few of the others though. I hope you get out of it.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 10:05
I do think I might need practice after all this time.
I hope you won't mind if I approach a teaching style where you just learn by watching me, and not getting to practice much on your own. Yes, as much as there actually are women on the internet, there actually are women who don't like being eaten out but love to suck cok, too - and they're even on the internet!
I think I'm finding more and more that there needs to be a definite "breaking point". You can't just get angry at the smallest things, and you certainly can't put up with the big things.
I don't know; I actually think it is and ought to be possible to "accept" smaller things, to work a way around it if it is worth it. For example, if I were in emotional heaven with a person, I could arrange myself with them not fulfilling my sexuality (at least when it comes to definite quantity or quality - I will not again put up with the more vague feeling of not being wanted or accepted per se, be it emotionally or sexually).

I most definitely wouldn't tolerate the first one. I think I have tolerated a few of the others though. I hope you get out of it.
See, this was my emotional break-through.. I've been raised a "Hit me once, and I'll leave immediately and never look back" woman, and the phrase "Every person has chosen their own partner out of own free will, and if they stay with someone who (starts to) exhibit intolerable behavior, it's their own dam fault for not leaving" is heard very often at my parents' house.

However, in my darkest hours of despair in my current relationship, I'd probe myself as to what else I'd put up with already, and realized that I couldn't in all earnest say "If he hits me once, I'm out, no question about it".. I suddenly knew I'd probably at least be terribly torn, probably make a gazillion excuses and find ways to stay.. that was when I sharply realized I had gone and have been worn down into mighty terrifying territory, and that I needed to snap out of it.
I've been on the healing path wrenching myself out of his abusive emotional grasp hold slowly ever since, and by now I've gathered the strength to have made the definite resolution to leave him, and I'm very confident I'll actually pull through.

I've felt like if I'm not the one to apologise, every single time, regardless of the topic of argument, he'd walk... and like the best I deserved was begging for someone to want to be with me.
Yes. It even goes so far that I apologize for [I]his behavior and rudeness, that I go "Oh, I'm so sorry I did/said something that made you this angry, just tell me what it was and I'll rectify it..."

Having said that, to this day, I wouldn't by any means say that I was in an abusive relationship. I honestly don't know what I consider emotional abuse and what I don't. And while I don't think he ever felt the way I felt, I just... well, I just wonder about myself, sometimes. Wonder whether my judgment is really impaired or not, because if I was to lay things out textbook-style, well, I've been told that it looks pretty bad, but as I said... I'd never, by any means, consider it emotional abuse.

Same thing here. I'm suffering badly, and I say it's nearly completely his fault, and anyone I talk to about his behavior, also those who've shared our flat and saw it first hand, confirm that what he does is untolerable, and tell me to get my ass out of there ASAP.

He doesn't see it that way. He doesn't understand. He thinks either what he did was fully okay, or he doesn't see that he did it at all. He doesn't understand why I suffer, and gets angry at me for "blaming him" and "making him feel bad" when I do start to cry once more.

Most of the time, I am sure that he's major psychological problems. But sometimes, I do wonder too whether it's me who's screwed up, oversensitive, with naive expectations etc.
SaintB
28-01-2009, 11:48
I hope you won't mind if I approach a teaching style where you just learn by watching me, and not getting to practice much on your own.

Hmm, well I guess that arrangement works too ;).Really? I don't do it because I think its expected I do it because I like it, but I always try to accept the little difference we all have; you'd be the first woman to not lik that I ever heard of.

I don't know; I actually think it is and ought to be possible to "accept" smaller things, to work a way around it if it is worth it. For example, if I were in emotional heaven with a person, I could arrange myself with them not fulfilling my sexuality (at least when it comes to definite quantity or quality - I will not again put up with the more vague feeling of not being wanted or accepted per se, be it emotionally or sexually).

*Snip for length*

Most of the time, I am sure that he's major psychological problems. But sometimes, I do wonder too whether it's me who's screwed up, oversensitive, with naive expectations etc.
I have definitely apologised for making him feel bad about making me feel like shit. I'd call him on something, he'd get upset over the fact that I was upset, and I'd end up apologising and begging him to forgive himself/believe that he's a good person/etc, because he'd leave if I couldn't convince him that he was good for me. And somehow along the way, I'd just forget whatever it was that made me feel like shit in the first place.

*Snip for length*

I'm sort of in the same league (only male) I always strive for those relationships where I and my lover accept and even embrace our differences and celebrate what we share in common; and most importantly be happy about it. I don't apologize for who I am and I don't want her to apologize for who she is; and I always try to make my apology mean more than just the words I say if I find an actual reason to be apologetic.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 12:49
I have definitely apologised for making him feel bad about making me feel like shit. I'd call him on something, he'd get upset over the fact that I was upset, and I'd end up apologising and begging him to forgive himself/believe that he's a good person/etc, because he'd leave if I couldn't convince him that he was good for me. And somehow along the way, I'd just forget whatever it was that made me feel like shit in the first place.
Yes, exactly - only without the last part; I always know exactly what made me feel like shit and I feel doubly bad because I'm calling myself on the shit I'm pulling even though I'm the one who got hurt in the first place - yet can't stop.

I don't even ever really think he was a bad person.
I don't either, with my guy. I think he's done incredibly bad things, but I honestly think he's got several deep-running psychological problems and isn't actually aware of the crap he's pulling.

I honestly feel like any relationship I'll ever be in is going to be like that. I feel like, if it was really that bad, I'd have left...
That's definitely different for me. I now know where to draw the line, I know where it'll slide into, so I won't go with that "It's not that bad" or "It'll get better soon" or "I can cope with that for the sake of love" anymore. Even if I somehow were the kind to attract assholes like that, I'd never be in such a relationship anymore the second I recognize it is "one of those" again.

I mean, I was the one willing to make sacrifices even though he wasn't, right? I let myself be in that relationship.
That's the one thing I reproach myself for. I don't blame myself for falling in love with him, and I don't blame myself for having become a victim of emotional abuse, but I blame myself strongly for having let it happen a second time within that relationship.

And I hope that one day, it's too much for you to rationalise, and you get out. I do honestly know that sometimes, no matter how bad it is... you can't bring yourself to leave. I never could, even when I was crying myself to sleep at night.
I am, thankfully, at the point where it's too much to rationalize - I've fully and firmly made up my mind to leave; I'm just waiting for a few more weeks for certain reasons. And yes, I've known that it'd be better to leave from, say, week two of our relationship onwards, and yes, I've for the longest time not been able to, and yes, I've cried myself to sleep many more times than not, mostly right next to his oblivious, uncaring body - but now I will be able to leave. And oh yes, I'll make a thread about it, and we'll all celebrate together. ;P

Hmm, well I guess that arrangement works too ;).Really? I don't do it because I think its expected I do it because I like it, but I always try to accept the little difference we all have; you'd be the first woman to not lik that I ever heard of.
Good to hear. Yep. Poor boyfriend's really puzzled about it too, only he won't accept it and pressures me to let him go down on me all the time.
SaintB
28-01-2009, 12:54
Good to hear.

What can I say, I'm sort of lazy. I don't try to hide who I am. The way you talk about it I wouldn't call the guy poor unless I was referring to finances.
In seriousness, I hope you can actually find the strength to take that last step. I also hope things go well for Amarenthe.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 13:00
In seriousness, I hope you can actually find the strength to take that last step. I also hope things go well for Amarenthe.
Thanks. And I shall, and you all shall know about it - The Big Fat SoWiBian Break-Up Thread. ;P And Amarenthe will be in it, too, and we'll both find guys in there who show outrage at what our exs have done, make it clear they're completely different, and then go on to comfort us and become our super hero boyfriends.

... everyone who's already promised to fuck and treat me well in this thread will remain MY catch, though I shall of course share if Amarenthe wants to.
SaintB
28-01-2009, 13:02
Thanks. And I shall, and you all shall know about it - The Big Fat SoWiBian Break-Up Thread. ;P And Amarenthe will be in it, too, and we'll both find guys in there who show outrage at what our exs have done, make it clear they're completely different, and then go on to comfort us and become our super hero boyfriends.

... everyone who's already promised to fuck and treat me well in this thread will remain MY catch, though I shall of course share if Amarenthe wants to.

Sounds great perhaps I'll make a trip there.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 13:11
Sounds great perhaps I'll make a trip there.

OF COURSE you'll make a trip there! You can't possibly support me all these days, and then not show for my end-of-relationship celebratory thread!
SaintB
28-01-2009, 13:17
OF COURSE you'll make a trip there! You can't possibly support me all these days, and then not show for my end-of-relationship celebratory thread!

Excellent point. I just can't help myself, I am a tragically confident person and I try to spread my confidence to everyone around me.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 14:19
Thanks. And I shall, and you all shall know about it - The Big Fat SoWiBian Break-Up Thread. ;P And Amarenthe will be in it, too, and we'll both find guys in there who show outrage at what our exs have done, make it clear they're completely different, and then go on to comfort us and become our super hero boyfriends.

I'll bring popcorn.

And, you suck at replying to TGs :p

And I don't really have any true "horrid ex" stories, though my most recent is somewhat earning the bitch crown for blaming ME for "our" cat getting sick. our cat? No, fuck you. MY cat. I picked him up off the street, I named him, I had him checked up on, I took care of him while studying for the fucking bar, I drove him to the vet on new years day (although, I wasn't alone for that one, for which my company at the time has all of my gratitude). He's my fucking cat. You just occassionally fed him and took up his spot on the bed.

Fuck you.
SaintB
28-01-2009, 14:22
And I don't really have any true "horrid ex" stories, though my most recent is somewhat earning the bitch crown for blaming ME for "our" cat getting sick. our cat? No, fuck you. MY cat. I picked him up off the street, I named him, I had him checked up on, I took care of him while studying for the fucking bar, I drove him to the vet on new years day (although, I wasn't alone for that one, for which my company at the time has all of my gratitude). He's my fucking cat. You just occassionally fed him and took up his spot on the bed.

Fuck you.

That's horrible! How could she take up the cats spot on the bed?!! Talk about injustice...

I've had cheaters, drug addicts, and the totally deranged in my stable of bad relationships.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 15:28
I'll bring popcorn.

And, you suck at replying to TGs :p

That's the attitude.

And no, I just excel at focusedly filling out tomorrow's final exam.
I'd hate to make you cry, but.. my academic success is much, much more of a priority than your being happy with my TG-sending frequency.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 15:30
That's the attitude.

I do try.

I'd hate to make you cry,

Think a bit much of yourself don't ya? :p

but.. my academic success is much, much more of a priority than your being happy with my TG-sending frequency.

I assure you, I'm far more fun than a comparative language exam..

How'd it go?
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 15:42
Think a bit much of yourself don't ya? :p
Nevah.

I assure you, I'm far more fun than a comparative language exam..

How'd it go?

Prove it.

Well, the exam itself was piss-easy already, and seeing how I had 18 hours to fill it out at home.. I'd be very surprised if I don't get 100%, so - it went okay, I guess.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 15:48
Prove it.

you keep coming back, do you not?
SaintB
28-01-2009, 15:52
you keep coming back, do you not?

That's only because I was in the shower pal. :p
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 15:56
you keep coming back, do you not?

I think we've sufficiently established in the discussion about my behavior in my current relationship that I positively seem to actively seek out the bad.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 16:01
I think we've sufficiently established in the discussion about my behavior in my current relationship that I positively seem to actively seek out the bad.

aww, now I'd hate for you to go and think of me as "bad", heh.
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 16:02
aww, now I'd hate for you to go and think of me as "bad", heh.

Oh, right. How could I forget that you're so badass, so gaddamn professionally badass, that you'd wish nothing more.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 16:05
Oh, right. How could I forget that you're so badass, so gaddamn professionally badass, that you'd wish nothing more.

well.....maybe just a little
SoWiBi
28-01-2009, 16:12
well.....maybe just a little

You mean "little" as in you'll use only the pastel-colored plush handcuffs and the smaller whip, yes?
Nanatsu no Tsuki
28-01-2009, 16:27
Hmm, good point by Balzac.

Indeed it is.
Neo Art
28-01-2009, 16:36
You mean "little" as in you'll use only the pastel-colored plush handcuffs and the smaller whip, yes?

for foreplay, at least.
Wilgrove
28-01-2009, 19:25
Indeed it is.

It really does vary from people to people though. A person like me is more motivated by love, because I would not stay in a relationship because of fear. Because once you give in to fear, the other person has all of the control.

However, I have dated this one woman who was scared of losing me to a point in which she was very clingy, she'd say that she loved me (she started this after our first date) and I've talked to her. She's very afraid of being alone, she doesn't like to be alone, at all. I've known guys like that too, even guys in their 30s. They'll stay in a bad relationship because of that fear.