NationStates Jolt Archive

If they were to remake the original Star Wars trilogy, who should they cast?

A few suggestions to get the ball rolling:
Ian McKellan as Obi-Wan Kenobi
Hugo Weaving as Grand Moff Tarkin
Samuel L. Fucking Jackson as Admiral Ackbar ("It's a motherfucking trap!")

Also, no comments that they shouldn't remake the original. And anyone who appeared in the original is disqualified.

Jay Leno as Jabba The Hunt

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/leno_blog.jpg
http://weblogs.newsday.com/sports/baseball/yankees/blog/260px-JabbaTheHutt.jpg

i motion to disqualify anyone who appeared in episodes 1-3 as well.

Gilbert Gottfried as the Emperor. *nod*

I hate to say it, and I'm sure I'll take flak for it, but put a couple more years on Shia LaBeouf and he could do Han Solo. Harrison Ford as Solo was largely frantic and improvised, and short with people who got him angry. I'm pretty sure the similarity is why LaBeouf was cast with him in Indiana Jones 4.

David Hyde Pierce as C3PO

Steven Seagal as Luke Skywalker.


:)

Steven Seagal as Luke Skywalker.


:)

die.

I hate to say it, and I'm sure I'll take flak for it, but put a couple more years on Shia LaBeouf and he could do Han Solo. Harrison Ford as Solo was largely frantic and improvised, and short with people who got him angry. I'm pretty sure the similarity is why LaBeouf was cast with him in Indiana Jones 4.

I was more thinking LaBeouf for Luke.

Also: Nathan Fillion as Han Solo.

die.

lmao

Hugo Weaving as Tarkin? Are you mad? We need someone like Ian McKellan or uh, the guy who played Saruman whose name I can't quite remember at the moment. Someone classy. Hugo's a badass and all, but he just isn't subtle and classy like that. He's the barely-constrained rage; Tarkin is the malicious but ice-cold gentleman officer.

How about Russel Crowe as Han Solo? Much better than Shia LaBeouf. Maybe LaBeouf could play Luke Skywalker.

Ozzie Osbourne as Darth Vader

I was more thinking LaBeouf for Luke.

Also: Nathan Fillion as Han Solo.

I was originally thinking that too, until I realized that LaBeouf would seem more at ease trying to con me than save a princess. Fillion would work well too, though, now that I think of it.

Casting Luke, to me, involves finding someone who can pull off the level of naivete and impatience that he begins with, and manage to ease it into full-on confidence and conviction by the third film. Also, having serious facial reconstruction in between might help. My only request is that we include Shadows of the Empire as well.

Ozzie Osbourne as Darth Vader

Vader: " *mumble mumble mumble* father.... *mumble mumble mumble* destiny... *mumble mumble mumble* rule the galaxy... *mumble mumble* "

Luke: "What?!?"

Vader: " *mumble mumble mumble* father.... *mumble mumble mumble* destiny... *mumble mumble mumble* rule the galaxy... *mumble mumble* "

Luke: "What?!?"

There is nothing like a Brummie accent to show the character is evil.

How about Jeremy Irons as Obi-wan? He basically plays a ripped-off Obi-wan in Eragon.:)

For Vader, I don't know. Any bodybuilder can fill the suit, but the voice is going to be hard to recast. Not that you'd need too, since the original actor could still do it.

Hugo Weaving and Christopher Lee (Sauruman) would both make fine Tarkins, I think. But Lee's already in Star Wars as Dooku.

For the rest, I have no solid ideas. Really, its hard to imagine any senario where recasting these roles for a live-action film would end well.

Hugo Weaving as Tarkin? Are you mad? We need someone like Ian McKellan or uh, the guy who played Saruman whose name I can't quite remember at the moment. Someone classy. Hugo's a badass and all, but he just isn't subtle and classy like that. He's the barely-constrained rage; Tarkin is the malicious but ice-cold gentleman officer.

How about Russel Crowe as Han Solo? Much better than Shia LaBeouf. Maybe LaBeouf could play Luke Skywalker.

See, again, I can see LaBeouf pulling off the "frantic, naive, impatient" Luke, but this is the full trilogy, and eventually he loses that shtick and becomes competent. From what I've seen, Shia has trouble when his roles, even briefly, turn very serious. Han is a bit of a joker throughout, and has success more through luck and ewoks than anything by the end of it.

Also, Will Smith for Lando. He's just about cheesy enough with the ladies, and I believe that he could turn some seriousness on for the brief moments involving Vader and piloting the Falcon.

Also, Will Smith for Lando. He's just about cheesy enough with the ladies, and I believe that he could turn some seriousness on for the brief moments involving Vader and piloting the Falcon.

I like Smith, but I just can't see him as Lando. He's too much of an "action movie hero."

There is nothing like a Brummie accent to show the character is evil.

*returns from wiki* Wait, there's a whole population of people who speak like Ozzy?!? :eek:

I thought the drugs did that to him.

Hmm. Well, I learned my new thing for today. :)

I like Smith, but I just can't see him as Lando. He's too much of an "action movie hero."

I dunno, I like some of his more dramatic outings too. If we can do better, sure, but right now I'm at a loss. As long as he doesn't say "Aw, HELL naw."

The blond guy from Banlieue 13 should play Vader's body, and for the voice, the same guy who does Duke Nukem. Badass.

Crispin Glover should be Boba Fett.

The girl from Run Lola Run and The Princess and the Warrior should be Leia. Her accent is sexy.

Hugo Weaving as Tarkin? Are you mad? We need someone like Ian McKellan or uh, the guy who played Saruman whose name I can't quite remember at the moment. Someone classy. Hugo's a badass and all, but he just isn't subtle and classy like that. He's the barely-constrained rage; Tarkin is the malicious but ice-cold gentleman officer.

How about Russel Crowe as Han Solo? Much better than Shia LaBeouf. Maybe LaBeouf could play Luke Skywalker.

Christopher Lee played Saruman. He's a bit too hammy to play Tarkin. Though I see your point about Weaving.

Crowe could do Han, but I still think Nathan Fillion would be better, particularly at hitting on Leia.

Also, Will Smith as Lando Calrissian, and Alec Newman for Luke. He played a similar role in Dune as Paul Atreides/Muad'Dib.

Will Smith is wasted on Lando. Make him Luke! In fact I think we need to shake things up. Lando doesn't need to be black just because Billy D's black. Neither does Darth Vader, we can spraypaint the Vader suit another color - I like lime. Let's give Han Solo to Jackie Chan.

Accent is immaterial. Leia needs to be, at the beginning, a bit spoiled but absolutely serious, then able to fall in love with whoever we decide on for Han, and ultimately a very strong female lead who picks up a bit of sandpaper and loses the silver spoon altogether.

What about Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith as Han Solo and Chewbacca?

Ozzie Osbourne as Darth Vader

James Earl Jones is the only man who may ever do the voice of Darth Vader in any movie ever made, that is written somewhere in the bible!

What about Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith as Han Solo and Chewbacca?

How about a cameo by Jason Mews as Darth Balls...

Sigourney Weaver as Han Solo.

Joseph Alois Ratzinger as Darth Sidious. :p

Joseph Alois Ratzinger as Darth Sidious. :p

Nah, unfortunately, he has a day job.

Joseph Alois Ratzinger as Darth Sidious. :p

He could do that, i'm totally cerial :p

Nah, unfortunately, he has a day job.

...as a sith.

http://www.waynebesen.com/uploaded_images/benedict_xvi-775685.jpg

lets have a white guy voice act vader,and have a black guy in the suit.
Also make sure luke and leia is white just to confuse everyone to hell.

*returns from wiki* Wait, there's a whole population of people who speak like Ozzy?!? :eek:

I thought the drugs did that to him.

Hmm. Well, I learned my new thing for today. :)


http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzb7BanTuXw

i motion to disqualify anyone who appeared in episodes 1-3 as well. Agreed!

Vader: " *mumble mumble mumble* father.... *mumble mumble mumble* destiny... *mumble mumble mumble* rule the galaxy... *mumble mumble* "

Luke: "What?!?"
then you have that chest panel show the text of what Vader is saying...

Sigourney Weaver as Han Solo.
nah, Mon-motha. but not Solo.

perhaps...
Dwayne Johnson as Solo,
Andy Sirkis as Yoda
Shia Lebouf as Luke
Morgan Freeman as Obi Wan

die.

Use the fricking force or I will twist your leg into pretzel.

The Rock? Man I didn't even know his real name.

I would go With Morgan Freeman as Obi Wan

Daniel Craig as anyone on the Imperial Side he would make an excellent officer.

Christian Bale pretty much anyone on the Jedi side

Michael Caine An older more experience Jedi
Aaron Eckhart Anyone on the Jedi side
Eric Roberts Probably on the Imperial side


By the way can we change the director?

Jeremy Irons good choice I would go with the dark side though. He plays way better bad guys.

Martha Stewart as Princess Leia.

"I have transformed this simple smuggling vessel into a cornucopia of winter flora..."

"Get the FUCK off my ship!"

I would have Rosie O' Donnell as Jabba the Hutt, or Marlon Brando.

Alan Rickman as Darth Vader and Morgan Freeman as the voice of Darth Vader.

Matt Damon as Greedo. *nod*

Both the wizards from the Lord of the rings. They have to be Imperial as well.

By the way can we change the director?

Please, and also whoever does the editing (probably Lucas as well) - the Star Wars films are the worst edited films outside of 70s porn.

Brian Blessed as Chewbacca

Christian Bale as Anakin in II and III!

Martha Stewart as Princess Leia.

"I have transformed this simple smuggling vessel into a cornucopia of winter flora..."


Its a good thing.

What about Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith as Han Solo and Chewbacca?

Jay and Silent Bob in space. What an awesome thought.

Big Bird as Chewbacca

Chuck Norris is probably hairy enough for Chewbacca.

Patrick Stewart has to be in there somewhere. maybe he should just appear as Capt. Picard and kick all their star wars asses ;)

j/k :P

You can just see them blowing smoke rings into the air lock or something. We would automatically get R rating with those guys. Star wars on the Cover of High Times.

Cockknocker 38 up, 9 down love ithate it

Mark Hamill's part in Jay and Silent Bob strike back.

hmmm... let's shake things up a bit.

while I did agree with the no one from the first three episodes... I'll amend that to allow those actors to reprise their roles. say Ewan McGregor as Obi Wan, Hayden as Darth Vader...

but the rest? I say REWRITE!!!

Let Darth Vader capture Luke and tries to train him as a Sith. and you have Leia going off to 'rescue' her brother from the Empire's 'ebil' clutches. teaming up with a down on his luck trader (Solo) and joined by the one who was supposed to watch over Luke (Kenobi)

What about Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith as Han Solo and Chewbacca?

that's a fucking great idea :D

Ozzie Osbourne as Darth Vader

so is that :tongue:

that, or Schwarzenegger as Vader. i can so imagine him doing the epitomous "Luke, I am your father" bit ;)

If I can't have Ozzie Osbourne then I want Christopher Walken to voice Darth Vader

Episode IV:

Hugh Jackman as Han Solo
Tim Curry as Obi-Wan-Kenobi
John Cleese as C-3PO (voice)
Jeremy Irons as Grand Moff Tarkin

Jeremy Piven as Yoda

Fuck off, all ye's.

Stop raping my childhood.

Christopher Walken to voice Darth Vader he would be awesome. Probably better as the body. Before he in the suit.

Danny DeVito as R2D2

Fuck off, all ye's.

Stop raping my childhood.

what...

Lucas did that with his "Special Edition"
then again with his "Director's Cut"
then again with his "First three episodes"

I am suppose to be the Prince of Darkness for *%*% sake

Nobody would understand a word he was saying.

Did Darth Vader just say *%*% off?

Fuck off, all ye's.

Stop raping my childhood.

Paris Hilton as the Death Star.

Paris Hilton as the Death Star.

Will she say "I'm so hot..." before each firing?

http://www.fanboys-themovie.com/#/home-page

Will she say "I'm so hot..." before each firing?

ANd moments before exploding.

http://www.fanboys-themovie.com/#/home-page

That's awesome.

Chris Tucker as Lando

Jett Lee could do any of the stunts

http://www.fanboys-themovie.com/#/home-page

I am soo spending the money to watch that in the theatres!

what...

Lucas did that with his "Special Edition"
then again with his "Director's Cut"
then again with his "First three episodes"
Then you guys don't need to add to all the raping.

Then you guys don't need to add to all the raping.

Rosie O'Donnell as the Sarlacc. :D

Chris Tucker? Really? Are you TRYING to ruin it?

OK, let's see.

Luke Skywalker: Steve Buscemi
Obi-Wan Kenobe: Bono
Lando: Chris Cocker
Princess Leia: Jessica Simpson
Han Solo: Gilbert Gottfried
Grand Moff Tarkin: John Travolta
Darth Vader: Adam Sandler
Jabba the Hut: Barney the Dinosaur

There, is that sufficient to traumatize children (and adults) for generations to come?

:p

Rosie O'Donnell as the Sarlacc. :D

No no, she's perfect as Jabba The Hutt!

We don't even need a costume for her, just strip her naked!

Hmm...won't that make people go blind though?

No no, she's perfect as Jabba The Hutt!

Jabba goes to Sally Strothers:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/6b/311_sallys.jpeg/180px-311_sallys.jpeg

Hmm...won't that make people go blind though?

I went blind just from reading the suggestion.

Jabba goes to Sally Strothers:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/6b/311_sallys.jpeg/180px-311_sallys.jpeg

Ahh touche.

I still want Morgan Freemen as the voice of Vader though.

Is it just me that thinks "she could play Yoda" whenever I see Hilary Clinton?

I went blind just from reading the suggestion.

Then how were you able to type the post and it the Submit button?

Is it just me that thinks "she could play Yoda" whenever I see Hilary Clinton?

Only if Yoda was an annoying woman who is clearly overcompensating for something and probably has a dick surgically put on her, then yea.

Is it just me that thinks "she could play Yoda" whenever I see Hilary Clinton?

No, but I do think how fucked-up it would be if Yoda was instead played by a live actor in green facepaint and prosthetic ears. I'm thinking Warwick Davis.

Frank Thornton as General Dondonna
Burt Kwouk as Obi wan Kenobi
Clive Swift as some old jedi type
Honeysuckle weeks as Leia
Hugh Laurie as Han

Then how were you able to type the post and it the Submit button?

I never use the mouse. Memorized hotkeys - as all veteran computer users should.

Then you guys don't need to add to all the raping.

considering Family Guy's Blue Harvest, Hardware Wars (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077658/) and Robot Chicken...

we're doing it a favor!

the true raping was the Star Wars Holiday Special.

No, but I do think how fucked-up it would be if Yoda was instead played by a live actor in green facepaint and prosthetic ears. I'm thinking Warwick Davis.
Not Leonard Nimoy?

Keanu Reeves as Luke Skywalker because the gods know Luke should have little if anything to say. Whiny Jedi!
Christopher Lee as Grand Moff Tarkin, the other guy wasn't bad-ass enough.
Christopher Walken as Obi-Wan Kenobi. It would just kick arse.
Angelina Jolie as Princess Leia Organa. Yes, I went there.
Wesley Snipes as Admiral Ackbar. Enough said.
George W. Bush as Emperor Palpatine. It could work, especially with the comic relief.

Reboot not remake.
Make it Band of Brothers still from the point of view of the storm troopers.

Snoop Dogg as Lando Calrisian. Both are pimps. -nods-

Megan Fox as Leia...Mmm Gold bikini time. :D

Sam Jackson as r2-d2. Think about all the beeps that would be made.

William Shatner as Darth Vader.

William Shatner as Darth Vader.

He's too fat.

He's too fat.

Jabba the Kirk

He's too fat.
Thinner than James Earl Jones...

..I think.

Why on earth would anyone bother? They're perfect as is, even with Lucas fucking with them twice or thrice already.

Colin Farrel as Dash Rendar....What? He was there ! lol....

Gotta have Malkovich in there somewhere.
And Andy Dick.
Maybe even Jon Lovitz.

that, or Schwarzenegger as Vader. i can so imagine him doing the epitomous "Luke, I am your father" bit ;)

What, and after he slices Lukes hand off, he goes "You'll be back"? :p

Firefly cast meets Star wars!
Nathan Fillion as Solo
Adam Baldwin as Vader
Morena Baccarin as Leia
Sean Maher as Luke
Anyone else have additions or objections?

Firefly cast meets Star wars!
Nathan Fillion as Solo
Adam Baldwin as Vader
Morena Baccarin as Leia
Sean Maher as Luke
Anyone else have additions or objections? [/Browncoat]Get in line!

Chewbacca - Someone tall
R2-D2 - Someone short
Darth Vader body - Someone big

Darth Vader voice - Seth MacFarlane (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0532235/)
Grand Moff Tarkin - Pete Postlethwaite (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000592/)
Emperor Palpatine - Joseph Fiennes (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001212/)

Luke Skywalker -Sean Faris (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0267511/)
Han Solo - Ryan Reynolds (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005351/)
Leia Organa - Emma Stone
(http://www.imdb.com/name/nm1297015/)

Obi-Wan Kenobi - Alan Rickman (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000614/)
C3-P0 - Eddie Izzard (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0412850/)
Lando Calrissian - Terrence Howard (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005024/)
Wedge Antilles - James McAvoy (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0564215/)

http://www.fanboys-themovie.com/#/home-page
Star Trek did it first. Twice.

First of all, whoever said replace the director, I concur. I hereby nominate Joss Whedon.

Honestly, could Star Wars as written and directed by Joss Whedon fail to be awesome beyond all words? Especially if it is combined with Nathon Fillion as Han Solo?

Also, new idea for Princess Leia: Hayden Pannettiere.

Wedge can be played by Katee Sackhoff. I don't think anyone would really mind if we just do an Expy of Starbuck from BSG.

...oh, I just had the most awesome idea EVER for Obi-Wan:
Anthony Stewart Head.

A few suggestions to get the ball rolling:
Ian McKellan as Obi-Wan Kenobi
Hugo Weaving as Grand Moff Tarkin
Samuel L. Fucking Jackson as Admiral Ackbar ("It's a motherfucking trap!")


George Clooney as Obi-Wan Kenobi
Jim Carrey as Han Solo
Brad Pitt as Luke
Kate Winslet as Leia
Harrison Ford as Tarkin


Will Smith as Lando Calrissian
Catherine Zeta-Jones as Mon Mothma
Jack Nicholson as The Emperor

William Shatner as Darth Vader.

Vader doesn't have nice shiny shirts, doesn't get to dive roll and shoot, and doesn't get blonde bimbos. :(

This is blasphemy! Star wars was perfect

What, and after he slices Lukes hand off, he goes "You'll be back"? :p

lol, that's awesome. he should also say it when his tie fighter gets blasted by the millenium falcon in new hope. "i'll be baaaaaaaacccckkkkk....." as he spins off into deep space... :P

This is blasphemy! Star wars was perfect

http://uk.imdb.com/title/tt0076759/goofs

also, the 2 meter-wide hole in a super space station leading directly to the main reactor... come on!

Megan Fox as leia?

Also, new idea for Princess Leia: Hayden Pannettiere.

As long as I'm Solo, that's all good. She's nummy.

Dath Vader Voice- Dave Prowse

Dath Vader Voice- Dave Prowse

Only fair really, with James Earl Jones for the body?

Sean Pertwee as C3P0, Alan Rickman as Vader, Robert Carlyle as Solo.

Microsoft Sam as R2D2!