NationStates Jolt Archive

The majority of human communication does not come from the words we say, but the intonation behind the words, as well as our body language...when we are attracted to someone, our pupils dialate, we lean in, we smile more. When we are recalling a false story, we tend to look up and to the left. When we are defensive, we tend to cross our arms infront of ourselves or rub our hands.

These are general trends, but each individual has their own personal actions. What are yours? Why do you think they do them?

When I'm in a situation where I feel upset, I often play with my necklace (my parents gave it to me when I left for college). It gives me some strange feeling of reassurance.

I also have noticed that I tend to relax around friends by putting an arm over the back of the couch...not around the friends shoulder, but up on the backrest. I think it shows the same affection as putting the arm around the shoulder without the physical contact, as well as the standard body langauge of leaving my chest and stomach open (a common sign of comfort).

I also frequently do the hand rubbing thing when I get nervous, though, that one I can consciously stop myself from doing in interviews and the like.

I've never quite worked out why - but, when I'm nervous or just uneasy... I often find my nose itches.

Analysing myself, I find I'm wondering if it's a mechanism to cover my mouth (by scratching my nose), which often is a mark of dishonesty - but it has nothing to do with lying, or even speaking - so I'm really not sure how it connects.

Looking up and to the left (or right) can also be a sign of truthfulness - the portions of the brain that store face-memory and which respond to body language require a *lot* of energy and bloodflow to operate; looking away from a person redirects that energy and blood to other areas (such as, say, areas storing long-term memory) and may therefore indicate a sincere desire to respond accurately to a question.

It's a difficult thing to read body language - what my intuition tells me is correct often is not, and I've never been a success socially. Lucky thing I don't really have to be. :p As to whether I have tics, or whether my body language is agreeable to others, I wouldn't know. I've neither been complimented nor castigated on that basis, or given any opinion at all.

I've never quite worked out why - but, when I'm nervous or just uneasy... I often find my nose itches.

Analysing myself, I find I'm wondering if it's a mechanism to cover my mouth (by scratching my nose), which often is a mark of dishonesty - but it has nothing to do with lying, or even speaking - so I'm really not sure how it connects.I have a friend who sneezes whenever she gets scared. Can't explain that one either.

Looking up and to the left (or right) can also be a sign of truthfulness - the portions of the brain that store face-memory and which respond to body language require a *lot* of energy and bloodflow to operate; looking away from a person redirects that energy and blood to other areas (such as, say, areas storing long-term memory) and may therefore indicate a sincere desire to respond accurately to a question.

It's a difficult thing to read body language - what my intuition tells me is correct often is not, and I've never been a success socially. Lucky thing I don't really have to be. :p As to whether I have tics, or whether my body language is agreeable to others, I wouldn't know. I've neither been complimented nor castigated on that basis, or given any opinion at all.

From what I remember, if the person is being truthful, they will usually look up to the right, whereas if they are lying, it will be up to the left.

As for whether or not your personal body language is agreeable, that isn't so much what I'm asking. I'm more asking what your personal habits are. Lots of people bite their nails when they are nervous...few I know play with their necklace as I do. Things like that.

I used to wear glasses, and got in the habit of pushing them up the bridge of my nose whenever I felt fidgety (which is often). I still haven't gotten out of the habit, but look a lot more stupid poking myself in the nose at random time intervals.

I used to wear glasses, and got in the habit of pushing them up the bridge of my nose whenever I felt fidgety (which is often). I still haven't gotten out of the habit, but look a lot more stupid poking myself in the nose at random time intervals.

It does, of course, have the advantage of making random people on the internet laugh, when you tell them about it...

:D

From what I remember, if the person is being truthful, they will usually look up to the right, whereas if they are lying, it will be up to the left.

In theory, it shouldn't matter which direction you're looking, so long as you've broken eye-contact with whomever you're speaking to and thereby redirected the bloodflow. I'm not sure what percentage of people do this; I was mentioning it as an alternative hypothesis rather than as the null - I know they've studied the phenomenon in people with prosopagnosia. Kind of interesting.

As for whether or not your personal body language is agreeable, that isn't so much what I'm asking. I'm more asking what your personal habits are. Lots of people bite their nails when they are nervous...few I know play with their necklace as I do. Things like that.

Ah, sorry. I suppose I do have a tic - I'll rotate my hands rapidly on occasion when nervous, usually without intending to and often clenching them into a fist afterward. That one's obvious enough that I'm aware of it even without being told. :tongue:

It does, of course, have the advantage of making random people on the internet laugh, when you tell them about it...

:D
Glad to hear it. I'd feel much worse about my social faux-pas if it didn't bring joy to those around me. Cruel, mean-spirited joy. :)

I used to wear glasses, and got in the habit of pushing them up the bridge of my nose whenever I felt fidgety (which is often). I still haven't gotten out of the habit, but look a lot more stupid poking myself in the nose at random time intervals.

Ah, sorry. I suppose I do have a tic - I'll rotate my hands rapidly on occasion when nervous, usually without intending to and often clenching them into a fist afterward. That one's obvious enough that I'm aware of it even without being told. :tongue:

For a second, I ignored who the poster was, and got the image of a person rotating their hands, clenching into fists, then poking themselves in the forehead. Possibly with sound effects...

Glad to hear it. I'd feel much worse about my social faux-pas if it didn't bring joy to those around me. Cruel, mean-spirited joy. :)

That's the best kind.


I used to have the habit of cracking my knuckles, then my neck, then my back when I was tense...in a strangely specific order.

Then I realized that it really freaked out some of my friends.

Now I do it whenever they're around :)

when we are attracted to someone, our pupils dialate, we lean in, we smile more.

or you could just do the thing that is failsafe and glance down :$

What are yours? Why do you think they do them?

I chew my mouth when I'm concentrating hard and rock gently like I've been abused when sitting still

I'm really not comfortable being too close to people unless I am very comfortable with them. So I'll sit right beside an old friend, but if I haven't known you long, even if I'm sleeping with you, you need to sit your ass across from me, or I'm going to freak. Ditto with physical contact. I'll hug people I'm very intimate with, but some people are 'huggers' and it really weirds me out.

More generalised body language. I fidget constantly. Like, some part of me is always moving. When I'm talking and I'm really engaged, I HAVE to move more. Often my hands, but I'll also pace etc. I am very aware of not 'closing myself off' to people when talking to them, so I never cross my arms unless I really want to make it clear that I'm annoyed with something. I am more 'butch' and sprawly with my good friends, more drawn in and 'conservative' with strangers.

I also have a really, really hard time NOT watching people's mouths when they speak. I'm so used to it, because in the aboriginal community, you don't make much eye contact, especially with elders. So even if someone is about the same age as me, I 'default' and look at their mouths, which sometimes weirds people out a bit, and then I get uncomfortable trying to meet their eyes. Urgh.

When I'm really, really, REALLY angry...I smile. It's a particular grin, and some people don't recognise it...but most people do.

Whenever I look at a attractive girl that I may be intrested in, I lick my lips gently.

When I nervous I move my mouth in such a way it looks like I chewing gum.

When I thinking hard on something or just be idle, my head rocks back and forth a bit. But when somebody says stop that. I intansly stop.

Whenever I worried about my looks, I flatten my hair and kinda run it from the top of my head to the lower front.

Whenver I worried about something I stroke the fuzz that I claimed is a beard(or not when I shave).

When I was about to say something that I was nverous about or was I was unsure about a situation I was in, I would glup.

And I used to make a chuckly sound with my gum bone rubbing off the bottom of the bone in the middle of your left cheek(left of your mouth,after the soft spot) for no reason at all until a friend of mine punched me whenever I did it and I fell out of the habit.

And I used to say D'OH alot whenever I screwed up somehow really loudly without thinking about it until I eventally fell out of that habit.


And I sure I have more,but I can't think of them right now. But lets just say my friends call me a VERY annoying person for some reason.. :P


I to have that urge to fidget always. My mom used to say I had ants in my pants. I could be tapping my hands agaisnt a desk,or my knees,or a pencil,or taking something tiny apart or moving my feet around..I can't keep still...


And when I really,really sad. I smilie. A normal simile that seens senseless cause I just similing a grin for no reason with sad eyes...A reflect I picked up when I read on the internet that similing tricks your brain into relasing chemicals that make you happ(ier).

I'm really not comfortable being too close to people unless I am very comfortable with them. So I'll sit right beside an old friend, but if I haven't known you long, even if I'm sleeping with you, you need to sit your ass across from me, or I'm going to freak. Ditto with physical contact. I'll hug people I'm very intimate with, but some people are 'huggers' and it really weirds me out.Several of my coworkers have taken to basically molesting me...ranging from an ass grab to hugs to whatever else they may feel like doing. Now, they wonder why every time they make a sudden movement near me, I flinch.

Evidently, they don't get the whole "Guys. I really hate being touched."

More generalised body language. I fidget constantly. Like, some part of me is always moving. When I'm talking and I'm really engaged, I HAVE to move more. Often my hands, but I'll also pace etc. I am very aware of not 'closing myself off' to people when talking to them, so I never cross my arms unless I really want to make it clear that I'm annoyed with something. I am more 'butch' and sprawly with my good friends, more drawn in and 'conservative' with strangers.
I move my hands constantly. It is a struggle not to do it when I'm talking to customers.
I also have a really, really hard time NOT watching people's mouths when they speak. I'm so used to it, because in the aboriginal community, you don't make much eye contact, especially with elders. So even if someone is about the same age as me, I 'default' and look at their mouths, which sometimes weirds people out a bit, and then I get uncomfortable trying to meet their eyes. Urgh.I feel really awkward looking at someones eyes, so I usually focus on their nose.

Several of my coworkers have taken to basically molesting me...ranging from an ass grab to hugs to whatever else they may feel like doing. Now, they wonder why every time they make a sudden movement near me, I flinch.

Evidently, they don't get the whole "Guys. I really hate being touched."

Yeah, it's sort of weird because when I'm comfortable with someone, I really like it when they touch me, even if it's not at all sexual. If people I went to school with tried to 'molest' me, they'd be drawing back bloody stumps.

It's the close talkers I can't quite handle...they aren't doing it on purpose..they really just aren't comfortable standing back away from you, so it's like this little dance...they get close, I back up, they get close...until I'm against the wall and can't escape. Damn close talkers. Damn them to hell!

My eye contact is very deliberate and often timed just right.

I stare at my shoes, fiddle with my hair and don't talk to people unless it is absolutely necessary and that person is on my 'trusted' list.

In terms of habits, if someone says something dumb, I tend to facepalm. I also apparently have a look of continual bemusement and confusion.

I have a tendancy to Rub my chin and the back of my head all the time...Goatee, and Long hair, followed by shaving the whole thingll do that too ya, lol...

And I think i inherited the tendancy to shake my leg at random times from my mom...people seem to think im doing it cause im nervous, but, it does it on its own...

Yeah, it's sort of weird because when I'm comfortable with someone, I really like it when they touch me, even if it's not at all sexual. If people I went to school with tried to 'molest' me, they'd be drawing back bloody stumps.I sadly have little recourse at work. The problem is I started to take it as a joke, but it quickly moved past that and now some just won't stop. I really hate being touched on my stomach or sides...I tend to make that very well known.

I may have dropped the line "Any part of you that touches any part of me, you aren't getting back". I then almost broke the bitches finger. SHE hasn't touched me since ;)

It's the close talkers I can't quite handle...they aren't doing it on purpose..they really just aren't comfortable standing back away from you, so it's like this little dance...they get close, I back up, they get close...until I'm against the wall and can't escape. Damn close talkers. Damn them to hell!

My eye contact is very deliberate and often timed just right.

I can deal with close talkers some times...but I really like my personal space.

as for eye contact...I tend to be very deliberate as well...it either shows extreme interest, or extreme anger. Possibly the reason that I've been told I have "expressive" eyes is because I know how to use them

I have a tendancy to Rub my chin and the back of my head all the time...Goatee, and Long hair, followed by shaving the whole thingll do that too ya, lol...

And I think i inherited the tendancy to shake my leg at random times from my mom...people seem to think im doing it cause im nervous, but, it does it on its own...

I do the goatee and back of the head thing. Goatee out of need to move my hands, back of the head for comfort.

A judge in my last moot remarked that I had 'laser beam eyes' :D I was just afraid that if I looked down at my factum, I'd pass out.

I think it's harder for a guy to avoid unwanted contact than for women, and frankly, that's bullshit. No one should have to insist on NOT being touched...that should be the default.

A judge in my last moot remarked that I had 'laser beam eyes' :D I was just afraid that if I looked down at my factum, I'd pass out.

I think it's harder for a guy to avoid unwanted contact than for women, and frankly, that's bullshit. No one should have to insist on NOT being touched...that should be the default.

oh, definatly...partly because of how men understand "no" and its implications. I talked to a male coworker about it, and he said "It's bullshit. If you slapped their asses and they said "no", you'd be fired on the spot. You look the manager in the eyes, say "why do you do nothing to stop this" [something I have said before], and they laugh and say "you've earned a place in heaven".

I'm okay enough with my coworkers that I choose not to pursue the issue...but I also make it clear that I dislike being touched, and they continue.

Actually, to tie that back into the thread, that is my biggest tell when I'm extremely uncomfortable. I will figure out some way to cover my sides and my stomach, while making myself as small as possible...frequently by sitting. I don't just fold my arms...I clutch my sides. No clue why, but I really just hate the feeling of being touched there. I'm not even ticklish.

If I get annoyed, I generally tend to start handling the closest, most practical item for disposing of said annoyance. Depending on whether or not I'm in character, it could be either Excalibur, my lumber axe, or a rather sharp set of pencils.

Also, when I think somebody's lying to me, I have a tendency to 'stare,' in that I generally focus on their eyes without ever glancing away. I'm told that I come off as rather aggressive when I do this.

When I feel threatened, physically or otherwise, I unlock my knees, I take a solid stance, and keep my arms loose at my sides. Just habit. That's me, ready for a fight.

When I feel threatened, physically or otherwise, I unlock my knees, I take a solid stance, and keep my arms loose at my sides. Just habit. That's me, ready for a fight.

It depends...if I'm put into a position where I'm immediatly vulnerable (IE someone touching me), then I curl up. If it is where I am on equal footing to start with, then I plant my feet well.

In terms of habits, if someone says something dumb, I tend to facepalm.

I've never heard/seen anyone that hasn't facepalmed when something ignorant is said. I only developed the habit because I cover my mouth everytime I smile/laugh...

Deep in thought, I chew my lower lip or touch it a lot. The more involved the problem I'm thinking about gets, the more I'll do this and also start nibbling on the tip of my thumb or pinkie finger. I often become aware that I'm doing that really, really a lot, but I can't stop it. I start doing it unconsciously.

I'm not sure what other little habits I have because I'm kind of not physically self-aware. Except for that lip thing, I don't really catch myself doing odd things like that. My mom tells me I sometimes walk around with my shoulders hunched up a little, but I have no idea why I do that or how often.

I'm a compulsive fidget in most circumstances, but here are the most obvious tics:

When I'm thinking I tend to curl my hair around my index finger. I think this something I developed during exams to distract myself from the fact I wasn't writing.

I am unable to eat a meal I dislike without betraying my lack of enthusiasm for the food by spinning my cutlery around my fingers.

When I am lying I tend to rub my hands together. Sometimes I also defecate massively and uncontrollably. I'm not a good liar.

When I am listening to someone tell me something boring/stupid but in circumstances where I have to be polite, I (apparently) nod my head frantically and say "mmm" a lot. Overcompensating, I guess.

And - although I don't think this is a very scientific study - someone once remarked that they could tell I was into someone because I held my books at my side while talking to them, whereas I usually hug them to my chest when talking to other people.

Edit: Oh snap, I forgot the most obvious one! I stick my tongue out, slightly, to the side when I'm drawing carefully. Though that's not really body language.

I dont know why but I hate making eye contact for more that a couple seconds. my friends get really annoyed because instead of looking at them and talking ill just turn my head and look at stuff in the background.

Whenever I get nervous I smile which is a REALLY bad habit at times.
Also I crack my knuckles in this specific order and i dont even notice until people get annoyed and say something

I dont know why but I hate making eye contact for more that a couple seconds. my friends get really annoyed because instead of looking at them and talking ill just turn my head and look at stuff in the background.

Whenever I get nervous I smile which is a REALLY bad habit at times.
Also I crack my knuckles in this specific order and i dont even notice until people get annoyed and say something
try looking at the bridge of peoples noses...it looks like you're making eye contact, but stops the awkwardness. It also allows for those "piercing glare" moments.

It depends...if I'm put into a position where I'm immediatly vulnerable (IE someone touching me), then I curl up. If it is where I am on equal footing to start with, then I plant my feet well.

Almost everyone is bigger than me...my 'equal footing' is something I carve out with my wit, my skills and my fists when need be:)

I fiddle with my hair basically every time I'm not doing anything else in particular with my hands. I am also trying to train my body out of going into "cower" mode every time I am at all stressed or nervous, but in the meantime, my friends have mostly learned that you can gauge my mood by how far my shoulders are hunching inwards and how thoroughly my vital organs are protected.

I dont know why but I hate making eye contact for more that a couple seconds. my friends get really annoyed because instead of looking at them and talking ill just turn my head and look at stuff in the background.

I do that, too. I think everyone has some level of discomfort looking straight into someone's eyes for more than a few seconds, but most people move their eyes quickly enough that they don't notice. For some reason my gaze tends to stay focused on one spot; maybe you're the same way.

Almost everyone is bigger than me...my 'equal footing' is something I carve out with my wit, my skills and my fists when need be:)
I actually can't stand being around people taller than me because I'm so used to that being my advantage...my uncles are all taller than me and the only way I gain an advantage on them is by being quicker with insults...doesn't turn out well when you meet someone new.

The majority of human communication does not come from the words we say, but the intonation behind the words, as well as our body language...when we are attracted to someone, our pupils dialate, we lean in, we smile more. When we are recalling a false story, we tend to look up and to the left. When we are defensive, we tend to cross our arms infront of ourselves or rub our hands.

These are general trends, but each individual has their own personal actions. What are yours? Why do you think they do them?

When I'm in a situation where I feel upset, I often play with my necklace (my parents gave it to me when I left for college). It gives me some strange feeling of reassurance.

I also have noticed that I tend to relax around friends by putting an arm over the back of the couch...not around the friends shoulder, but up on the backrest. I think it shows the same affection as putting the arm around the shoulder without the physical contact, as well as the standard body langauge of leaving my chest and stomach open (a common sign of comfort).

I also frequently do the hand rubbing thing when I get nervous, though, that one I can consciously stop myself from doing in interviews and the like.

When I'm trying to stare down someone, I play with my beard. When I get a question right, I usually snap my fingers, and when I'm angry/excited I start talking in a bad British accent.

I've never quite worked out why - but, when I'm nervous or just uneasy... I often find my nose itches.
I'm exactly the same.


When I'm nervous, I often avoid eye contact and rub my nose repeatedly.