NationStates Jolt Archive


People Who Need to Relax

H N Fiddlebottoms VIII
04-12-2008, 16:37
There are some things in life worth getting worked up over (like global poverty or assholes that stand in the express lane with more than 12 items). Then, there is Beethoven's 5th. Last night, a friend told me about the IMDB reviews (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0342108/usercomments), saying that they could be summed up as, "This family comedy about a farting dog has made me become VERY ANGRY!"
I'll admit that I've never seen this particular movie, and I only remember the original as that movie where some woman got peed on by a Saint Bernard (I think I was 10 years old at the time). However, I am relatively certain that no sequel to it could be worth such outrage.

So, the audience participation part, what examples of hilariously misplaced anger have you witnessed recently? (There will be no bonus points given out for citing NSG).
Londim
04-12-2008, 16:42
I was at a gig the other day and there were these 2 women, around 20, who thought they owned the place. One guy asked them politely if he could just get past them to get closer to the stage, and instead of taking a small step to the left they went into a tirade of why they deserved, yes folks,deservedto be at the front. They didn't have any real reasons. Hell I had a more legitimate reason, I was there to review the show for my uni newspaper. However karma got them later when they tried to have a go at a friend of mine, where I heard the best put down ever:

"I don't care, you're not pretty anyway."
German Nightmare
04-12-2008, 17:04
"I don't care, you're not pretty anyway."
*whip crack*

It could be said that I'm among the people who need to relax. Not really because I've thrown any fits, but because after the last 6 months I definitely need a break, what with finally graduating from university and such. Hell, the last 5 weeks I had an oral exam each week. Against great odds I passed them all - and now I don't really know what to do with my spare time. Except relaxing. ;)
Tagmatium
04-12-2008, 17:18
http://positiveposition.com/blogpics/saddam.png
"Hey relax, guy!"
Wilgrove
04-12-2008, 17:20
This is why the world needs nicotine and weed. *nod* Drugs calm everyone down.
Free Lofeta
04-12-2008, 17:36
This is why the world needs nicotine and weed. *nod* Drugs calm everyone down.

"They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do just as well — you just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort. There is a difference."

Bill Hicks
Rathanan
04-12-2008, 17:40
This is why the world needs nicotine and weed. *nod* Drugs calm everyone down.

Amen to the cigarettes... Malboros and Camels for everyone! Maybe the damn cigarette taxes will go down... :mad:

Barack Obama supposedly is a smoker... Hmmmm...
German Nightmare
04-12-2008, 17:44
This is why the world needs nicotine and weed. *nod* Drugs calm everyone down.
Not every drug calms you down, though!
Tagmatium
04-12-2008, 17:46
Not every drug calms you down, though!
No.

You wouldn't want to start taking e or coke if you wanted to have a quiet night in, for example.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
04-12-2008, 17:57
The employess at La Moncloa surely need to relax. Our Christmas lighting ceremony was last night and, when we told them they had to sit down because many of the expectators couldn't see the show, they started complaining and bitching. We were just asking them to sit down. Chill the fuck down.
Dumb Ideologies
04-12-2008, 18:07
In a bizarre ironic twist, my psychiatrist really seems to have control and anger management issues. I'm basically not allowed to express an opinion unless specifically permitted, or thats "controlling the process" or a "sign of immaturity". She contradicts herself a lot. And then there's the time she told me to go ask a GP for referral onwards and she'd write a report etc...then when I do the next time she saw me she went on an approximately ten minute rant about how presumptuous I was being to think that she's write a report so soon. But it looks like I might have a referral now, if it goes through I've got no reason to be nice to her anymore. I may bring an axe to the next appointment.
Ashmoria
04-12-2008, 18:11
The employess at La Moncloa surely need to relax. Our Christmas lighting ceremony was last night and, when we told them they had to sit down because many of the expectators couldn't see the show, they started complaining and bitching. We were just asking them to sit down. Chill the fuck down.
expectators is not a word...

did you mean spectators?
German Nightmare
04-12-2008, 18:12
In a bizarre ironic twist, my psychiatrist really seems to have control and anger management issues. I'm basically not allowed to express an opinion unless specifically permitted, or thats "controlling the process" or a "sign of immaturity". She contradicts herself a lot. And then there's the time she told me to go ask a GP for referral onwards and she'd write a report etc...then when I do the next time she saw me she went on an approximately ten minute rant about how presumptuous I was being to think that she's write a report so soon. But it looks like I might have a referral now, if it goes through I've got no reason to be nice to her anymore. I may bring an axe to the next appointment.
Take the chainsaw. It's much more fun!!! :eek2::tongue::D
Nanatsu no Tsuki
04-12-2008, 18:18
expectators is not a word...

did you mean spectators?

Damn with my grammar and spelling today.:(

Yes, I meant spectators.
Ashmoria
04-12-2008, 18:23
Damn with my grammar and spelling today.:(

Yes, I meant spectators.
your english is always so excellent that it surprised me when you made a small mistake.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
04-12-2008, 18:25
your english is always so excellent that it surprised me when you made a small mistake.

I guess I'm not in peak, mental condition today. Sowwy!:tongue:
Lunatic Goofballs
04-12-2008, 18:46
In a bizarre ironic twist, my psychiatrist really seems to have control and anger management issues. I'm basically not allowed to express an opinion unless specifically permitted, or thats "controlling the process" or a "sign of immaturity". She contradicts herself a lot. And then there's the time she told me to go ask a GP for referral onwards and she'd write a report etc...then when I do the next time she saw me she went on an approximately ten minute rant about how presumptuous I was being to think that she's write a report so soon. But it looks like I might have a referral now, if it goes through I've got no reason to be nice to her anymore. I may bring an axe to the next appointment.

Take the chainsaw. It's much more fun!!! :eek2::tongue::D

There's a reason why the majority of maniacs use machetes. *nod*
Laerod
04-12-2008, 18:54
I missed the elevator by a few seconds. "No problem," I thought and waited for the next one to go up to the third floor. Someone got on on the second floor and made the elevator go back down to the ground floor to get out. Needless to say, I was not amused.
SoWiBi
04-12-2008, 19:24
Most people just need to chill the fuck out. Especially people driving cars.

And people riding in public transportation vehicles. And people waiting in line.
South Lorenya
04-12-2008, 21:25
Someone once insisted that I betrayed Nintendo by having my N64 hooked up to sony television.

Even though the TV was so old that it predated both nintendo and sony consoles.
German Nightmare
04-12-2008, 22:11
There's a reason why the majority of maniacs use machetes. *nod*
Ooh boy, am I glad that I then don't fall into that category!
I missed the elevator by a few seconds. "No problem," I thought and waited for the next one to go up to the third floor. Someone got on on the second floor and made the elevator go back down to the ground floor to get out. Needless to say, I was not amused.
Did you at least press every single button before you left the elevator? :p
Most people just need to chill the fuck out. Especially people driving cars.
Until I get the complete James Bond package in a car, they better.

After that, say hello to Mr. Flamethrower! :eek:
New Limacon
05-12-2008, 02:18
*snip*
The Letters section in most newspapers is always chock full of misplaced outrage. The Catholic Virginian is one of the best sources.
Here are some interesting theological topics which can create heat: transubstantiation. The Trinity. The role of the sacraments.
Here are some that really shouldn't be reason to fret: where the pastor sits. American bishops not vocally damning the president-elect to hell.
Guess which show up as letters?
Skallvia
05-12-2008, 02:21
I sight me on Several occasions on NSG...

Where's my Bonus points :mad:
Rotovia-
05-12-2008, 02:32
In a bizarre ironic twist, my psychiatrist really seems to have control and anger management issues. I'm basically not allowed to express an opinion unless specifically permitted, or thats "controlling the process" or a "sign of immaturity". She contradicts herself a lot. And then there's the time she told me to go ask a GP for referral onwards and she'd write a report etc...then when I do the next time she saw me she went on an approximately ten minute rant about how presumptuous I was being to think that she's write a report so soon. But it looks like I might have a referral now, if it goes through I've got no reason to be nice to her anymore. I may bring an axe to the next appointment.

I would. My theory is if you're in therapy and you kill or maim your therapist, you should get an automatic pass, especially if they're a dick
King Arthur the Great
05-12-2008, 02:55
The employees at La Moncloa surely need to relax. Our Christmas lighting ceremony was last night and, when we told them they had to sit down because many of the expectators couldn't see the show, they started complaining and bitching. We were just asking them to sit down. Chill the fuck down.

expectators is not a word...

did you mean spectators?

Damn with my grammar and spelling today.:(

Yes, I meant spectators.

No. Fuck that, I'm making expectators a word.

Expectator: A spectator that has unbelievable expectations about an impending spectacle. Will likely engage in behavior guaranteed to ruin experience for everybody, including him- or herself.
Neesika
05-12-2008, 03:15
You know what I want?

An amusement park for stressed out adults. There would be a long grocery line and old women in the express line with more than 15 items, paying with pennies and coupons. You'd pay money to kick them in the ass or throw canned beans at them.

There'd be a 'road rage' section where someone would cut you off, you'd jump out and bash their car with a baseball bat, and possibly hospitalise them.

A government office area, where bored bureaucrats would run in fear when you brandish the semi-automatic gun handed to you after paying your entry fee.

Or just a random staircase where you can kick someone down the stairs.

You know. All 'fake' and stuff. But intensely satisfying.
Saige Dragon
05-12-2008, 04:45
Several million Canadians just had big uproar about democracy in action. I was rather amused at their misplaced anger and then it hit me, several million Canadians are borderline retarded.
German Nightmare
05-12-2008, 06:58
You know what I want?

An amusement park for stressed out adults. There would be a long grocery line and old women in the express line with more than 15 items, paying with pennies and coupons. You'd pay money to kick them in the ass or throw canned beans at them.

There'd be a 'road rage' section where someone would cut you off, you'd jump out and bash their car with a baseball bat, and possibly hospitalise them.

A government office area, where bored bureaucrats would run in fear when you brandish the semi-automatic gun handed to you after paying your entry fee.

Or just a random staircase where you can kick someone down the stairs.

You know. All 'fake' and stuff. But intensely satisfying.
Grand Theft Neesika - Stress reduction.
Sparkelle
05-12-2008, 07:01
Americans. Pretty much all of them.
Collectivity
05-12-2008, 07:29
Expectoration is spitting. It's pretty gross to spit but I spat in this right-winger's face when he defamed me in print (as an anarchist I'm not inclined to sue anyone because that is using the court system).
Ryadn
05-12-2008, 07:36
In a bizarre ironic twist, my psychiatrist really seems to have control and anger management issues. I'm basically not allowed to express an opinion unless specifically permitted, or thats "controlling the process" or a "sign of immaturity". She contradicts herself a lot. And then there's the time she told me to go ask a GP for referral onwards and she'd write a report etc...then when I do the next time she saw me she went on an approximately ten minute rant about how presumptuous I was being to think that she's write a report so soon. But it looks like I might have a referral now, if it goes through I've got no reason to be nice to her anymore. I may bring an axe to the next appointment.

Fire her. Fire her now. I finally fired my psychiatrist who, I am pretty sure, won his "degree" off of someone in a poker game, who talked to other patients on the phone during our sessions, and who brought his fucking DOG to work more than once. Not only to work, into the room. I was in the middle of telling him something quite unimportant I'm sure, like how I feel suicidal, and the dog was at my knee, and he actually interrupted to say, "She wants you to play tug." !!!

And that wasn't even what finally made me leave, it was that he moved his office into this group of conservative psychiatrists who had all these Christian magazines, and the one I was reading had a long article about why God hates gays. THAT'S when I left.

(After stealing the magazine, buying a pen, expressing my feelings all over the article and returning the magazine)
Ryadn
05-12-2008, 07:38
You know what I want?

An amusement park for stressed out adults. There would be a long grocery line and old women in the express line with more than 15 items, paying with pennies and coupons. You'd pay money to kick them in the ass or throw canned beans at them.

There'd be a 'road rage' section where someone would cut you off, you'd jump out and bash their car with a baseball bat, and possibly hospitalise them.

A government office area, where bored bureaucrats would run in fear when you brandish the semi-automatic gun handed to you after paying your entry fee.

Or just a random staircase where you can kick someone down the stairs.

You know. All 'fake' and stuff. But intensely satisfying.

Could you drive over bicyclers who don't obey traffic laws at this theme park? Because I do that in my head at least once a day.
SaintB
05-12-2008, 07:40
I need to relax.
SaintB
05-12-2008, 07:45
Until I get the complete James Bond package in a car, they better.

After that, say hello to Mr. Flamethrower! :eek:

My dream car is a Bradley.
Western Mercenary Unio
05-12-2008, 07:47
My dream car is a Bradley.

It's a tank, not a car.
Delator
05-12-2008, 07:47
You know what I want?

An amusement park for stressed out adults. There would be a long grocery line and old women in the express line with more than 15 items, paying with pennies and coupons. You'd pay money to kick them in the ass or throw canned beans at them.

There'd be a 'road rage' section where someone would cut you off, you'd jump out and bash their car with a baseball bat, and possibly hospitalise them.

A government office area, where bored bureaucrats would run in fear when you brandish the semi-automatic gun handed to you after paying your entry fee.

Or just a random staircase where you can kick someone down the stairs.

You know. All 'fake' and stuff. But intensely satisfying.

Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

I need to relax...but other drivers make this impossible.
SaintB
05-12-2008, 07:48
It's a tank, not a car.

Its 40+ ton Mini Van!
Western Mercenary Unio
05-12-2008, 07:51
Its 40+ ton Mini Van!

Which has a 30mm cannon and TOW missiles.
SaintB
05-12-2008, 07:55
Which has a 30mm cannon and TOW missiles.

Traffic control!

It also seats a family of 15, and can carry about 20 tons of groceries.
Non Aligned States
05-12-2008, 09:03
Traffic control!

It also seats a family of 15, and can carry about 20 tons of groceries.

It's got terrible mileage though. And can you imagine paying road tax on it?
Thumbless Pete Crabbe
05-12-2008, 09:04
Bobcat Goldthwait?

(Anyone remember him? Am I that old? :tongue:)
SaintB
05-12-2008, 09:14
It's got terrible mileage though. And can you imagine paying road tax on it?

If I could afford one, do you think I'd be concerned with fuel economy?
Non Aligned States
05-12-2008, 09:51
If I could afford one, do you think I'd be concerned with fuel economy?

There's being able to afford to buy something, and being able to afford it's upkeep. Some times, the upkeep ends up being more than it's sale price, especially high maintenance items.
SaintB
05-12-2008, 09:53
There's being able to afford to buy something, and being able to afford it's upkeep. Some times, the upkeep ends up being more than it's sale price, especially high maintenance items.

Upkeep is something I consider with every major purchase.
SoWiBi
05-12-2008, 13:50
You know what I want?

An amusement park for stressed out adults. [snip]

Some dude in this beautiful country of mine makes a living from a modified version of this.

He buys old cars that'd go to the car dump otherwise, invested in a heck lot of baseball bats, purchased some land and now he charges people an entry fee, whereupon they get a bat and a car assigned, and then they can go and beat that car to a pulp with the bat for however long they paid for.
Ifreann
05-12-2008, 13:58
Some dude in this beautiful country of mine makes a living from a modified version of this.

He buys old cars that'd go to the car dump otherwise, invested in a heck lot of baseball bats, purchased some land and now he charges people an entry fee, whereupon they get a bat and a car assigned, and then they can go and beat that car to a pulp with the bat for however long they paid for.

That's an awesome idea.
SoWiBi
05-12-2008, 14:05
That's an awesome idea.

Absolutely. I've heard it on the radio years back; I've tried googling to find it (and maybe give the boyfriend a ticket for Christmas), but so far no luck.
Blouman Empire
05-12-2008, 14:09
Fire her. Fire her now. I finally fired my psychiatrist who, I am pretty sure, won his "degree" off of someone in a poker game, who talked to other patients on the phone during our sessions, and who brought his fucking DOG to work more than once. Not only to work, into the room. I was in the middle of telling him something quite unimportant I'm sure, like how I feel suicidal, and the dog was at my knee, and he actually interrupted to say, "She wants you to play tug." !!!

And that wasn't even what finally made me leave, it was that he moved his office into this group of conservative psychiatrists who had all these Christian magazines, and the one I was reading had a long article about why God hates gays. THAT'S when I left.

(After stealing the magazine, buying a pen, expressing my feelings all over the article and returning the magazine)

Dude I think you need to relax, the first paragraph actually are better reasons to get a new psychiatrist than the second one where you left your doctor based on other doctors reading materials. Also who buys pens these days?
German Nightmare
05-12-2008, 16:29
Some dude in this beautiful country of mine makes a living from a modified version of this.

He buys old cars that'd go to the car dump otherwise, invested in a heck lot of baseball bats, purchased some land and now he charges people an entry fee, whereupon they get a bat and a car assigned, and then they can go and beat that car to a pulp with the bat for however long they paid for.
I was gonna say I've heard this done in Germany. Double-Duh! *waves*
Quintessence of Dust
05-12-2008, 17:12
My best friend constantly exerts me to 'chill the fuck out' because I tend to get riled up over trivia. I made a motivational poster saying 'Chill The Fuck Out!', but the effect was spoiled by, while not being chilled the fuck out about some particular bugbear, spilling tea on it. So now it is ominously stained.

Something happened last night that also fits into this category. A guy at the table next to us in the restaurant ordered a fish fillet. When it came, he lavishly praised it for being very thinly sliced. He began eating, and stopped to loudly fret to his partner about just how thin it was, and how it was going to be difficult to cut it up without it flaking, although he seemed to think this made it good. He continued, and eventually more or less broke down in tears. A grown man in agony because he couldn't cut up his dinner! (The waitress took it to the kitchen for the chef to cut up. I think it was sole.)

Some things I think are not particularly worth getting violently angry about:
- some Anglophones don't speak other languages
- modern RnB has little in common with traditional rhythm and blues
- yes, I am smoking a cigarette, really quite a long way away from you
- people who support a different sports team
- (for meat-eaters) the existence of vegetarians
- (for vegetarians) the existence of meat-eaters