NationStates Jolt Archive

Maybe it's just me. It probably is. But I'm not sure I understand anal sex.

I get the basic physics of it, as far as what goes where, and I get it physiologically, as far as why some people get pleasure from it. And I understand the reason for doing it that way in a homosexual couple. There really aren't many other options.

But here's what I don't get. What is the apparent obsession among heterosexual males with anal sex? I hear so much about supposedly "straight" guys wanting anal sex. Why? Does it feel better? Is it a psychological thing involving some sort of dominance thing? (The female party is resistant, so being able to do it implies some sort of submission?) Is it an in-joke among men that I'm just not in on? Can someone explain this for me?

Just to be clear, to the gay-bashers and gay-basher-bashers, and gay-basher-basher-bashers, and so forth:
This is not a thread about homosexual intercourse.
This is not a thread about homosexuality in any other way.
This is not a covert way of me saying I don't like gay people. To quote Roy Zimmerman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bja2ttzGOFM): "If you're two consenting adults, (and which of us isn't), it's nobody's business who you love, where you love, what equipment you might use. It's interesting, but it's nobody's business... Actually, the equipment is somebody's business."

This might help you understand:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7o9nAHptxWw


Okay maybe not, but I just had to post it. :D

It's usually regarded as either forbidden due to its long history OR one of the more, ahem, dirty acts (Pun intended) so for those who get bored with plain vanilla sex, it's another thing to do and try.

You could ask the same question about anything that is non-missionary sex.

Whats this have to do with sexual double standards?

Whats this have to do with sexual double standards?

My thought as well

The ass is usually tighter. If it isn't you might want to ask the girl her age. :P

My original angle was that some of the people who seem so obsessed with it also seem to bash gay people quite a bit. I chose not to include that in my OP, but forgot to change my title.

This might help you understand:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7o9nAHptxWw


Okay maybe not, but I just had to post it. :D
There it is. It's because you can't do it. Amazing. The question is answered in the first post.

Some of us are just really into asses.

It also is kind of a submission thing.

Whats this have to do with sexual double standards?

Men won't let women penetrate them anally?

My original angle was that some of the people who seem so obsessed with it also seem to bash gay people quite a bit. I chose not to include that in my OP, but forgot to change my title.

Ok, but it still has nothing to do with a double standard :p

Men won't let women penetrate them anally?

Says you.

Men won't let women penetrate them anally?

perhaps if they stopped suggesting it with a 24" triple wide dildo id consider it.

perhaps if they stopped suggesting it with a 24" triple wide dildo id consider it.

They could always work your anus up to 24".

Ok, but it still has nothing to do with a double standard :p

Sure, saying you can't have anal sex, but I can is a double standard. Especially if insults relating specifically to the person's preference for anal sex are used in said denial. Perhaps I've just reached that level of Liberal-ness and non-discrimination where I've failed to see anal sex between two men and anal sex between a man and a woman as being different. I've hit the Colbert Level: not seeing sex or race, no matter how blindingly obvious it is.

there is no double standard the chick can give me a rim job afterward if she likes

I think the biggest drive for oral or anal sex is the over hype from pornography. Not only does it popularize it, it make it socially acceptable or even expected. Extensive use of porn also increases the speed of "becoming bored" of regular sex, due to brain plasticity. So what ends up happening is that they need something more exotic to turn them on.

Other possibilities might be avoiding pregnancy without the use of condom, sadistic pleasure, actual physical differences between the mouth/vagina/anus, etc. But rest assure that it's not an inside joke, a guy most likely do mean it when he said he wants anal sex.

I think the biggest drive for oral or anal sex is the over hype from pornography. Not only does it popularize it, it make it socially acceptable or even expected. Extensive use of porn also increases the speed of "becoming bored" of regular sex, due to brain plasticity. So what ends up happening is that they need something more exotic to turn them on.



Yeah....I dont think this has anything to do with it.

I have no desire to insert my penis into an orifice that was designed for the purpose of expelling feces.

Men won't let women penetrate them anally?
This is true of one of my friends. He likes to be on the giving end of anal sex, but when it comes to a hot chick and a strap on...

This is true of one of my friends. He likes to be on the giving end of anal sex, but when it comes to a hot chick and a strap on...

Well it does feel different.

Yeah....I dont think this has anything to do with it.

There is a book call "the brain that changes itself", which focus on neuroplasticity and a chapter devoted to how extensive use of pornography affects the brain. And although I cannot verify the extensive use of pornography myself, I can only say that in general, I find myself getting bored of the same thing over a period of time and wanted to try something new.

I have no desire to insert my penis into an orifice that was designed for the purpose of expelling feces.

would you refuse to be sucked off by an organism with a two-way digestive tract?

And I understand the reason for doing it that way in a homosexual couple. There really aren't many other options.

Reeeeally.

Maybe it's just me. It probably is. But I'm not sure I understand anal sex.

I get the basic physics of it, as far as what goes where, and I get it physiologically, as far as why some people get pleasure from it. And I understand the reason for doing it that way in a homosexual couple. There really aren't many other options.

But here's what I don't get. What is the apparent obsession among heterosexual males with anal sex? I hear so much about supposedly "straight" guys wanting anal sex. Why? Does it feel better? Is it a psychological thing involving some sort of dominance thing? (The female party is resistant, so being able to do it implies some sort of submission?) Is it an in-joke among men that I'm just not in on? Can someone explain this for me?

Just to be clear, to the gay-bashers and gay-basher-bashers, and gay-basher-basher-bashers, and so forth:
This is not a thread about homosexual intercourse.
This is not a thread about homosexuality in any other way.
This is not a covert way of me saying I don't like gay people. To quote Roy Zimmerman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bja2ttzGOFM): "If you're two consenting adults, (and which of us isn't), it's nobody's business who you love, where you love, what equipment you might use. It's interesting, but it's nobody's business... Actually, the equipment is somebody's business."

Well...assholes tend to be tighter than Vaginas....the tighter the better for some men....

I don't get it myself honestly, I mean what if the woman has the sudden urge to poop? I don't want feces on my penis....just ewww....

would you refuse to be sucked off by an organism with a two-way digestive tract?

Yes, because when you say it like that I picture a green Simpsons alien, and that's not sexy. (To me. I don't judge!)

I agree with you, anal sex is disgusting. I won't judge what people do but the idea of it is negative to me. I'm also talking strictly about so-called heteros (man to woman), not anything else.

Well, there are also just 'wiring issues' I think sometimes. I know my 2nd girlfriend I ever had back in highschool - that was her big thing and it was nearly an INSTANT gratification for her for whatever reason. "Normal" sex after a hot shower and foreplay was then just as good for her, but if we didn't do that first... it was just mediocre fun.

I dunno. Never met anyone like that before or since, but all I can say is... it was interesting.

Well, there are also just 'wiring issues' I think sometimes. I know my 2nd girlfriend I ever had back in highschool - that was her big thing and it was nearly an INSTANT gratification for her for whatever reason. "Normal" sex after a hot shower and foreplay was then just as good for her, but if we didn't do that first... it was just mediocre fun.

I dunno. Never met anyone like that before or since, but all I can say is... it was interesting.

Dear Penthouse,

To this date, I know one woman who prefers anal sex to vaginal sex (odd, yes?), one who loves anal sex as a compliment to vaginal sex, one who likes anal sex, and one who has heard good things from her friends and wants to try it. And this is just in my close circle of female friends who would actually talk about this sort of thing.

However, I should point out that the girl who loves anal sex is also a stripper, so that could have something to do with it.

However, I should point out that the girl who loves anal sex is also a stripper, so that could have something to do with it.

Not exactly sure where you are going with that...

The sponsered link for this post is "Are you Gay?". I say that is a double standard!

I quite like anal sex. Then again, when it comes to this sort of thing I pretty much enjoy being fucked anywhere.

The sponsered link for this post is "Are you Gay?". I say that is a double standard!

Mine is the one where is looks like two black women are kissing. I think one is supposed to be a guy but he's very effeminate looking.

I quite like anal sex. Then again, when it comes to this sort of thing I pretty much enjoy being fucked anywhere.

Including the pocketbook/wallet/purse? :p

I quite like anal sex. Then again, when it comes to this sort of thing I pretty much enjoy being fucked anywhere.

How you doin'?

Including the pocketbook/wallet/purse? :p

I was thiinking more like sofa/counter top/car hood/neighbor's house/pool table... lol

To this date, I know one woman who prefers anal sex to vaginal sex (odd, yes?), one who loves anal sex as a compliment to vaginal sex, one who likes anal sex, and one who has heard good things from her friends and wants to try it. And this is just in my close circle of female friends who would actually talk about this sort of thing.

However, I should point out that the girl who loves anal sex is also a stripper, so that could have something to do with it.

Huh...so.. can I get to meet these friends of yours?

Maybe it's just me. It probably is. But I'm not sure I understand anal sex.

Go with that feeling. Also, read and understand what you've quoted:

To quote Roy Zimmerman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bja2ttzGOFM): "If you're two consenting adults, (and which of us isn't), it's nobody's business who you love, where you love, what equipment you might use. It's interesting, but it's nobody's business... Actually, the equipment is somebody's business."

There's only one way to understand it, if that's what you really want. Nobody telling you what it feels like for them will ever get it across to you in any meaningful way. It's like anything else that involves preference -- you're positive, you're neutral, or you're negative. What's to understand past that if you're not going to give it a go yourself?

To this date, I know one woman who prefers anal sex to vaginal sex (odd, yes?), one who loves anal sex as a compliment to vaginal sex, one who likes anal sex, and one who has heard good things from her friends and wants to try it. And this is just in my close circle of female friends who would actually talk about this sort of thing.

However, I should point out that the girl who loves anal sex is also a stripper, so that could have something to do with it.

How, precisely?

I don't know, I'm just not big on shit or places from which shit originates. That's just my personal preference, I guess you could say.

I don't know, I'm just not big on shit or places from which shit originates. That's just my personal preference, I guess you could say.

You do realize that, properly performed and prepared, anal sex isn't really all that messy or feces-laden, don't you? It isn't like the receiver takes a shit, wipes and then invites you in. Y'know...unless you're German.

You do realize that, properly performed and prepared, anal sex isn't really all that messy or feces-laden, don't you? It isn't like the receiver takes a shit, wipes and then invites you in. Y'know...unless you're German.

True, but it's the thought that counts.

(Actually, I think that sounds like something us Poles would think of. God, Polish lube...)

i have a straight friend that likes it because its tighter. (like the guy above said.)

Jesus I'm glad some one pointed out that anal sex is not a "gay issue". I guess it always feels like to me like their's an assumption that anal sex is a specifically gay thing.

It's not. It's just gross and most likely unhealthy. Just my opinion on the matter.

I still dont get how it actually fits up there

I agree with you, anal sex is disgusting. I won't judge what people do but the idea of it is negative to me. I'm also talking strictly about so-called heteros (man to woman), not anything else.

Could this be the double standard the OP was talking about?

It is disgusting when it is hetero intercourse, but isn't when it isn't hetero. What the hell does that have to do with it?

Could this be the double standard the OP was talking about?

It is disgusting when it is hetero intercourse, but isn't when it isn't hetero. What the hell does that have to do with it?

I guess it's disgusting if you comprehend the perspective as far as basic sexuality. I'm not going to consider homosexuality because it's outside the scope of this. If it's not supposed to be then I'd add self delusion to the loathsomeness of it simply for being dishonest about one's own sexuality. I mean, just screw men and be done with it.

I guess it's disgusting if you comprehend the perspective as far as basic sexuality. I'm not going to consider homosexuality because it's outside the scope of this. If it's not supposed to be then I'd add self delusion to the loathsomeness of it simply for being dishonest about one's own sexuality. I mean, just screw men and be done with it.

Why can't you do both?

But then what is basic sexuality? And that does get a bit boring after awhile.

Why can't you do both?

But then what is basic sexuality? And that does get a bit boring after awhile.

What did you want, a real answer or to just answer your own question?

I'm just saying it's unappealing to me, I don't care what others wish to do.

I'm just saying it's unappealing to me, I don't care what others wish to do.

Oh ok, and that is fair enough, I was reading your post wrong I thought you were saying it is disgusting when a male and female engage in it but not when this isn't the case.

I still dont get how it actually fits up there

Well, anus=sphincter. Sphincter=muscle. Muscles can be both contracted and relaxed. It's a matter of relaxing that muscle to the point where a penis can fit -- remember that the penis is itself somewhat spongy even when stiff. After that, well the average pooper is just about the right size for the average or smaller penis. Of course, the larger the member, the more relaxed and even stretched things have to get. One should know one's limits.

Not exactly sure where you are going with that...
How, precisely?

Well, it's a very sexual profession, closely linked with the porn industry. Likely, the kind of guys likely to go out with a stripper are also the kind of guys to indulge in porn, and that would therefore create the expectation of anal sex, especially when dating someone practically involved in the industry (though yes, I do realise that stripping and porn are different things, but they are closer related than stripping and working at the checkout at Target). This expectation is likely to manifest itself with most of the girl in questions partners, so, over time, she would likely grow to like it.

But this is all speculation.

I have no desire to insert my penis into an orifice that was designed for the purpose of expelling feces.

As opposed to an orifice that expels menstrual fluid and babies? Or one that comes equipped with teeth?

Oh ok, and that is fair enough, I was reading your post wrong I thought you were saying it is disgusting when a male and female engage in it but not when this isn't the case.

Perhaps "disgusting" wasn't the best choice of words. I really don't care what others do, that is, it doesn't bother me at a bodily level. The lousy thing is the characterization I've seen go along with it. I've known 3 whiny skanks that whined about some loser of theirs treating them like dirt and using them, and whining about them either getting anal off them or asking for it. A bunch of sordid details I never asked to listen, and the circumstance is a whole other story, but the point is guys who want anal from gals seem to be douchebags, fundamentally. I mean, all these weak reasons "it's tighter", yeah, whatever, oral is much better, if anything. The whole anal thing seems more like a weird subconscious 2 way humiliation fetish.

As opposed to an orifice that expels menstrual fluid and babies? Or one that comes equipped with teeth?

You got it.

eroticness is in the mind of the beholder/participant i guess.
different folks are stimulated by the thought of different activities/accessories.

that's why erotic stories use those funny little codes to help each of us find ones that are mostly the kinds that turn us on and avoid the ones that are mostly the kinds that turn us off.

anal sex isn't one that i look for. but that's pretty much just me i guess.
i am kind of puzzled by claims of anal sex NOT being 'gay'. i mean of people who seek it or are turned on by it, and then claiming to be turned off/repulsed by 'gayness'.

i mean i'm sure there are a lot of gays who absolutely are NOT into the whole froydian anal thing, or anal sex either, but how anyone can claim to both BE into it and NOT be gay, that's always been always been kind of a major "wtf" for me.

obviously i think what they mean is the're into being dom and not sub, but i don't see that as making valid any such claim as being streight about it.

As opposed to an orifice that expels menstrual fluid and babies? Or one that comes equipped with teeth?

Just make sure the teeth don't have braces on it, ouch.

Perhaps "disgusting" wasn't the best choice of words. I really don't care what others do, that is, it doesn't bother me at a bodily level. The lousy thing is the characterization I've seen go along with it. I've known 3 whiny skanks that whined about some loser of theirs treating them like dirt and using them, and whining about them either getting anal off them or asking for it. A bunch of sordid details I never asked to listen, and the circumstance is a whole other story, but the point is guys who want anal from gals seem to be douchebags, fundamentally. I mean, all these weak reasons "it's tighter", yeah, whatever, oral is much better, if anything. The whole anal thing seems more like a weird subconscious 2 way humiliation fetish.

Yeah, fair enough. Humiliation fetish is an interesting hypothesis.

eroticness is in the mind of the beholder/participant i guess.
different folks are stimulated by the thought of different activities/accessories.

that's why erotic stories use those funny little codes to help each of us find ones that are mostly the kinds that turn us on and avoid the ones that are mostly the kinds that turn us off.

anal sex isn't one that i look for. but that's pretty much just me i guess.
i am kind of puzzled by claims of anal sex NOT being 'gay'. i mean of people who seek it or are turned on by it, and then claiming to be turned off/repulsed by 'gayness'.

i mean i'm sure there are a lot of gays who absolutely are NOT into the whole froydian anal thing, or anal sex either, but how anyone can claim to both BE into it and NOT be gay, that's always been always been kind of a major "wtf" for me.

obviously i think what they mean is the're into being dom and not sub, but i don't see that as making valid any such claim as being streight about it.

I would say its the fact that its a girl? idk, how can it be gay as its not with a man? That makes about as much sense as saying all gays that like anal must be secretly straight as women have assholes too.

I have no desire to insert my penis into an orifice that was designed for the purpose of expelling feces.
As opposed to an orifice that expels menstrual fluid and babies? Or one that comes equipped with teeth?
That's certainly a good point. Personally, I think oral is a little disconcerting as well. But as to the former, I think it helps that one of the intended uses of that orifice is the reception of the penis to achieve fertilization.

Face it. Sex is gruesome. There is no way to make it nice.

Well, it's a very sexual profession, closely linked with the porn industry. Likely, the kind of guys likely to go out with a stripper are also the kind of guys to indulge in porn, and that would therefore create the expectation of anal sex, especially when dating someone practically involved in the industry (though yes, I do realise that stripping and porn are different things, but they are closer related than stripping and working at the checkout at Target). This expectation is likely to manifest itself with most of the girl in questions partners, so, over time, she would likely grow to like it.

But this is all speculation.

okay, reasonable enough

Face it. Sex is gruesome. There is no way to make it nice.

Sure there are, its just more fun if it isn't...
;)

That's certainly a good point. Personally, I think oral is a little disconcerting as well. But as to the former, I think it helps that one of the intended uses of that orifice is the reception of the penis to achieve fertilization.

The bolded word is, to my mind, the problem with this whole line of argument. People have these weird hang-ups about how sex is "supposed" to be, or how their bodies are "intended" to be used, without ever stopping and thinking about who exactly is doing the supposing or the intending. The mouth is not "intended" as a penis receptacle, because the mouth is not a manufactured item consciously designed for one specific purpose. It happens to work pretty well as a penis receptacle, though, so many people choose to use it that way. Ditto for the vagina, the anus, and the hand. People use these things because they work and they feel nice, and recognize that the only person qualified to make a decision as to the "intended" purpose of one's body parts is the owner of said body. I've never heard anyone claim that the hand evolved specifically for use in masturbation, but I've yet to meet anyone who's "disconcerted" by the idea of a guy choking his monkey. Why would putting one's penis in an anus or a mouth be any odder?

I think the biggest drive for oral or anal sex is the over hype from pornography. Not only does it popularize it, it make it socially acceptable or even expected. Extensive use of porn also increases the speed of "becoming bored" of regular sex, due to brain plasticity. So what ends up happening is that they need something more exotic to turn them on.

Other possibilities might be avoiding pregnancy without the use of condom, sadistic pleasure, actual physical differences between the mouth/vagina/anus, etc. But rest assure that it's not an inside joke, a guy most likely do mean it when he said he wants anal sex.

The first answer is bollocks, I'm afraid.

I don't watch porn, because it bores me. But, I've explored a whole variety of options with my partners. So... overhyped, popularised, expected... all crap, I'm afraid.

The sensitivity is different. Your lady friend can get even more intense orgasms. It doesn't have to be about pain, or pregnancy... it's just good sex.

Maybe it's just me. It probably is. But I'm not sure I understand anal sex.

I get the basic physics of it, as far as what goes where, and I get it physiologically, as far as why some people get pleasure from it. And I understand the reason for doing it that way in a homosexual couple. There really aren't many other options.

But here's what I don't get. What is the apparent obsession among heterosexual males with anal sex? I hear so much about supposedly "straight" guys wanting anal sex. Why? Does it feel better? Is it a psychological thing involving some sort of dominance thing? (The female party is resistant, so being able to do it implies some sort of submission?) Is it an in-joke among men that I'm just not in on? Can someone explain this for me?


It feels different and there's a bit of a taboo because the anus is "dirty," which is kind of a turn on. And it's also in some ways a more private place than the vagina, and it's hot have a partner who wants to be stimulated there. That's my 2 cents anyway.

The first answer is bollocks, I'm afraid.

I don't watch porn, because it bores me. But, I've explored a whole variety of options with my partners. So... overhyped, popularised, expected... all crap, I'm afraid.

The sensitivity is different. Your lady friend can get even more intense orgasms. It doesn't have to be about pain, or pregnancy... it's just good sex.

You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted. What is "good" often comes partly through culture. Unless of course you are to claim that the desire for anal sex is somehow an inherent inborn drive, or that individual who watch an extensive amount of pornography does not get desensitized from it. Simply suggest that you don't watch porn isn't enough. It's like claiming smoking doesn't increase the chance of lung cancer just because you have lung cancer without smoking, while living with people who smoke around you on a daily basis.

As Rick Roderick puts it in his lecture on "The Self Under Siege" (paraphrasing)
It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off.

Edit: I notice that my past post involves the phrase "over hype". I acknowledge that it's a judgment word and is inappropriate for an objective argument. I can only claim that there's a correlation between the recent increase in pornography use and the openness in desire to oral and anal sex. I know that correlation =/= causation. So to take it one step further and claim causation, I cited back in page 2 a book call "the brain that changes itself", which has a whole chapter dedicated to how pornography affects a person. Rather or not you want to take their word for it is up to you.

Well...assholes tend to be tighter than Vaginas....the tighter the better for some men....

I don't get it myself honestly, I mean what if the woman has the sudden urge to poop? I don't want feces on my penis....just ewww....

I think it's also that the ass is a different sensation and shape to the vagina.

And, no, she will not poo on your penis.

To this date, I know one woman who prefers anal sex to vaginal sex (odd, yes?), one who loves anal sex as a compliment to vaginal sex, one who likes anal sex, and one who has heard good things from her friends and wants to try it. And this is just in my close circle of female friends who would actually talk about this sort of thing.

However, I should point out that the girl who loves anal sex is also a stripper, so that could have something to do with it.

Right. So you're saying that your friend likes anal because she's a slut. Some friend you are.

Well, it's a very sexual profession, closely linked with the porn industry. Likely, the kind of guys likely to go out with a stripper are also the kind of guys to indulge in porn, and that would therefore create the expectation of anal sex, especially when dating someone practically involved in the industry (though yes, I do realise that stripping and porn are different things, but they are closer related than stripping and working at the checkout at Target). This expectation is likely to manifest itself with most of the girl in questions partners, so, over time, she would likely grow to like it.

But this is all speculation.

Prostitution = having sex with people for money. Porn = having sex in front of cameras for money. Stripping = taking one's clothes off and dancing for money. Retail = selling shit for money. In all honesty, I fail to see much of a difference between working at Target and being a stripper. You provide your services, skill, appearance, talents and knowledge for money. Also, who says the girl at Target isn't interested in being kinky? You need to remember that to your friend, stripping is a job. It provides income. It doesn't automatically make her "kinky". Sure, being exposed to new and interesting sexual situations does provoke fantasy, but really you can't say she likes anal because she's a stripper.

Mine is the one where is looks like two black women are kissing. I think one is supposed to be a guy but he's very effeminate looking.

No, I think it's two chicks.

i have a straight friend that likes it because its tighter. (like the guy above said.)

Your friend should find a girl with a tighter pussy then. ;)

I still dont get how it actually fits up there

Lube.
Patience.

Pain.



Alcohol helps.

anal sex isn't one that i look for. but that's pretty much just me i guess.
i am kind of puzzled by claims of anal sex NOT being 'gay'. i mean of people who seek it or are turned on by it, and then claiming to be turned off/repulsed by 'gayness'.

i mean i'm sure there are a lot of gays who absolutely are NOT into the whole froydian anal thing, or anal sex either, but how anyone can claim to both BE into it and NOT be gay, that's always been always been kind of a major "wtf" for me.

obviously i think what they mean is the're into being dom and not sub, but i don't see that as making valid any such claim as being streight about it.

Homosexuality has nothing to do with anal sex. Homosexuality does not mean "an attraction to having anal sex", it means "an attraction to the same sex". There is a huge difference. When two men, for example, lust for each other, they lust for the man, his body, his penis, his appearance. They don't just lust for his asshole. It's the same with straight men. When a man wants to have sex with a woman, it's not usually just her vagina he lusts for. He lusts for the woman as a hole, her breasts, her curves, her waist. When a man has sex with a woman, there's nothing homosexual about it. It doesn't matter whether it's in the ass or anywhere else. It's sex between a man and a woman.

Also, "froydian" = fail.

You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted. What is "good" often comes partly through culture. Unless of course you are to claim that the desire for anal sex is somehow an inherent inborn drive, or that individual who watch an extensive amount of pornography does not get desensitized from it. Simply suggest that you don't watch porn isn't enough. It's like claiming smoking doesn't increase the chance of lung cancer just because you have lung cancer without smoking, while living with people who smoke around you on a daily basis.

As Rick Roderick puts it in his lecture on "The Self Under Siege" (paraphrasing)
It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off.

Look, I am definitely interested in how pornography can desensitise people to some sexual situations, causing people to want even more "out there" sexual experiences because even "kinky" stuff has been normalised... BUT

People had anal sex well before the interwebs flooded your inbox with it.

I think it's also that the ass is a different sensation and shape to the vagina.

And, no, she will not poo on your penis.

Well she might, if both of you are into that sort of thing.

I have no issues with Anal sex. If you enjoy it, do it. :p

You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted. What is "good" often comes partly through culture. Unless of course you are to claim that the desire for anal sex is somehow an inherent inborn drive, or that individual who watch an extensive amount of pornography does not get desensitized from it. Simply suggest that you don't watch porn isn't enough. It's like claiming smoking doesn't increase the chance of lung cancer just because you have lung cancer without smoking, while living with people who smoke around you on a daily basis.

As Rick Roderick puts it in his lecture on "The Self Under Siege" (paraphrasing)
It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off.

What are you talking about?

You can easily turn of television. I did, something like 20 years ago. If there is something I specifically want to see (like the election coverage) I'll either hunt it up online, or I'll watch someone's TV specially for that purpose, but I'm hardly a child of the TV generation - and there is an increasing movement to do the same thing I have done. I have no idea who Rick Roderick is, I'm afraid.

The desire for anal sex is inherent. Not because it is specifically a certain act, but because the desire for sex is inherent, because lots of people find the ass an attractive focus, and because that means we often end up with sex where ass and sex are connected.

There are other factors, of course. The fact that, even though we can talk about menstruation, babies and eating... we don't talk about defecation (these are generalisations, obviously) means that there is a 'naughty' element to all forms of anal sexuality which is not connected with vaginal, oral or manual stimulation. But that's nothing to do with porn.

If you're honestly arguing that anal sex didn't exist before the universality of easy porn, (which is what you'd have to argue, if you're connecting it's apparent popularity with the relative acceptance of erotic imagery many places have now) you're probably not really qualified to discuss this subject.

I can only claim that there's a correlation between the recent increase in pornography use and the openness in desire to oral and anal sex.


You can claim it, but it's bullcrap.


I know that correlation =/= causation.


In this case, correlation =/= actually existing.


So to take it one step further and claim causation, I cited back in page 2 a book call "the brain that changes itself", which has a whole chapter dedicated to how pornography affects a person.

WHich can be easily shown to be horse-puckey, if we can exhibit the same openness about those sexualities we were discussing, in people that do not watch, and have never watched, porn.

Anal sex had been condemned since the times of the bible. And if it had to be condemned it is because it was being practiced...a lot.

Lube.
Patience.

Pain.


'Pain' has no place on that list.

Look, I am definitely interested in how pornography can desensitise people to some sexual situations, causing people to want even more "out there" sexual experiences because even "kinky" stuff has been normalised... BUT

People had anal sex well before the interwebs flooded your inbox with it.

I am not saying people doesn't do it before the widespread of pornography. In fact it's been observed that even chimpanzee and other great apes have anal sex. I am well aware that there are other reasons for it and I believe I have listed a few of those alternatives myself.

However I believe that pornography plays a very important role in the increase and popularize of anal sex as we see it today.

I still dont get how it actually fits up there

Next time you take a huge dump, estimate the diameter.

I am not saying people doesn't do it before the widespread of pornography. In fact it's been observed that even chimpanzee and other great apes have anal sex. I am well aware that there are other reasons for it and I believe I have listed a few of those alternatives myself.

However I believe that pornography plays a very important role in the increase and popularize of anal sex as we see it today.

You've got your theory, and you're determined to stick with it, no matter what the evidence says?

You've got your theory, and you're determined to stick with it, no matter what the evidence says?

If evidence as in your opinions, then yes I guess I will stick to the various books by people who has a bit more legitimacy in this subject.

Really, you not watching porn and like anal sex doesn't mean pornography has no effect for those who watch it, and the overall modern culture. You can make your argument more convincing by going a little beyond your personal story of how much you don't watch porn.

If evidence as in your opinions, then yes I guess I will stick to the various books by people who has a bit more legitimacy in this subject.

Really, you not watching porn and like anal sex doesn't mean pornography has no effect for those who watch it, and the overall modern culture. You can make your argument more convincing by going a little beyond your personal story of how much you don't watch porn.

Here's the thing.

If you present a universal rule, all I have to present, to make it untrue, is one exception. That's the problem with that kind of 'global' argument.

The fact that you choose to ignore thousands of years of history in order to stick to your books is mysterious. You treat it almost like religion. It doesn't matter to you that several cultures have practised anal as a form of birth control, for example... or as an adjunct to other lovemaking processes - sometimes even in the pursuit of religion. It doesn't matter to you that historical cultures have looked upon anal as an acceptable alternative for sex (based on the idea that 'virginity' only includes the vagina), an idea that actually still has SOME traction in our western world of today.

By the way - how do you KNOW those people have more 'legitimacy' than - for example - me? You don't know what I do.

You've changed the goalposts in your argument. Originally, you were arguing that porn was responsible for the increase in openness about anal sex. Now, you've just argued that porn affects those who watch it (which is perhaps a different debate) which obviously doesn't account for a GLOBAL increase in acceptance for anal sexuality, because (obviously) not everyone watches porn.

What's next?

Here's the thing.

If you present a universal rule, all I have to present, to make it untrue, is one exception. That's the problem with that kind of 'global' argument.

The fact that you choose to ignore thousands of years of history in order to stick to your books is mysterious. You treat it almost like religion. It doesn't matter to you that several cultures have practised anal as a form of birth control, for example... or as an adjunct to other lovemaking processes - sometimes even in the pursuit of religion. It doesn't matter to you that historical cultures have looked upon anal as an acceptable alternative for sex (based on the idea that 'virginity' only includes the vagina), an idea that actually still has SOME traction in our western world of today.

By the way - how do you KNOW those people have more 'legitimacy' than - for example - me? You don't know what I do.

You've changed the goalposts in your argument. Originally, you were arguing that porn was responsible for the increase in openness about anal sex. Now, you've just argued that porn affects those who watch it (which is perhaps a different debate) which obviously doesn't account for a GLOBAL increase in acceptance for anal sexuality, because (obviously) not everyone watches porn.

What's next?

Porn may have or not and effect on people who watch it or not in relation of anal sex or other kinds of sex.

Porn may have or not and effect on people who watch it or not in relation of anal sex or other kinds of sex.

And, if that had been Free's original statement, I might not have argued with it.

Here's the thing.

If you present a universal rule, all I have to present, to make it untrue, is one exception. That's the problem with that kind of 'global' argument.

The fact that you choose to ignore thousands of years of history in order to stick to your books is mysterious. You treat it almost like religion. It doesn't matter to you that several cultures have practised anal as a form of birth control, for example... or as an adjunct to other lovemaking processes - sometimes even in the pursuit of religion. It doesn't matter to you that historical cultures have looked upon anal as an acceptable alternative for sex (based on the idea that 'virginity' only includes the vagina), an idea that actually still has SOME traction in our western world of today.

By the way - how do you KNOW those people have more 'legitimacy' than - for example - me? You don't know what I do.

You've changed the goalposts in your argument. Originally, you were arguing that porn was responsible for the increase in openness about anal sex. Now, you've just argued that porn affects those who watch it (which is perhaps a different debate) which obviously doesn't account for a GLOBAL increase in acceptance for anal sexuality, because (obviously) not everyone watches porn.

What's next?

I fail to see how my argument is a global argument. An increase in trend does not mean it's a must for everyone and everything. Or that if you are into anal sex it must be due to pornography. An increase in trend simply means more people are into it now, that more people are affected by it directly or indirectly. Does that mean this is the only reason? No I did not say that, and if you interpreted it that way what can I say? I even went through great length explaining other alternative reasons for people having anal sex.

Does anyone else other than Grave_n_idle find that increase trend must = everyone?

I fail to see how my argument is a global argument. An increase in trend does not mean it's a must for everyone and everything. Or that if you are into anal sex it must be due to pornography. An increase in trend simply means more people are into it now, that more people are affected by it directly or indirectly. Does that mean this is the only reason? No I did not say that, and if you interpreted it that way what can I say? I even went through great length explaining other alternative reasons for people having anal sex.

Does anyone else other than Grave_n_idle find that increase trend must = everyone?

Rather than quibble with the text, and rather than indulge your penchant for moving the goalposts further and further... why don't we look at what you actually did say?

"...the biggest drive for oral or anal sex is the over hype from pornography. Not only does it popularize it, it make it socially acceptable or even expected..."

(So... biggest drive is pornography. It popularises it (fairly universal?), makes it socially acceptable (that is universal), and even expected (seriously? wishful thinking, I think - but definitely universal).

"...You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted..."

"...It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off...

And, let's look at the shifting goalposts...

"...I am not saying people doesn't do it before the widespread of pornography. However I believe that pornography plays a very important role in the increase and popularize of anal sex as we see it today....

"...Really, you not watching porn and like anal sex doesn't mean pornography has no effect for those who watch it, and the overall modern culture..."

Bold emphasis added for the 'universal' bit.


Here's a thought, though - why do you say "more people are into it"?

What do you base that on? Clearly not any actual attention to history, or even the cultures that exist today.

You obviously have this pet theory. That's cute, but it's not worth a lot. Anal sex is commonplace outside of the human species. It has been commonplace WITHIN the human species, for about as long as we have history. It has been variously ubiquitous in various cultures.

The only difference NOW, to a hundred years ago (maybe), is that you MIGHT be more open discussing it.

Perhaps "disgusting" wasn't the best choice of words. I really don't care what others do, that is, it doesn't bother me at a bodily level. The lousy thing is the characterization I've seen go along with it. I've known 3 whiny skanks that whined about some loser of theirs treating them like dirt and using them, and whining about them either getting anal off them or asking for it. A bunch of sordid details I never asked to listen, and the circumstance is a whole other story, but the point is guys who want anal from gals seem to be douchebags, fundamentally. I mean, all these weak reasons "it's tighter", yeah, whatever, oral is much better, if anything. The whole anal thing seems more like a weird subconscious 2 way humiliation fetish.

That's your opinion. Many others disagree.

The bolded word is, to my mind, the problem with this whole line of argument. People have these weird hang-ups about how sex is "supposed" to be, or how their bodies are "intended" to be used, without ever stopping and thinking about who exactly is doing the supposing or the intending. The mouth is not "intended" as a penis receptacle, because the mouth is not a manufactured item consciously designed for one specific purpose. It happens to work pretty well as a penis receptacle, though, so many people choose to use it that way. Ditto for the vagina, the anus, and the hand. People use these things because they work and they feel nice, and recognize that the only person qualified to make a decision as to the "intended" purpose of one's body parts is the owner of said body. I've never heard anyone claim that the hand evolved specifically for use in masturbation, but I've yet to meet anyone who's "disconcerted" by the idea of a guy choking his monkey. Why would putting one's penis in an anus or a mouth be any odder?

Y'know something, PWC? I don't care what you look like. Your ability to reason and your frankness make you SMOKIN' hot.

You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted. What is "good" often comes partly through culture. Unless of course you are to claim that the desire for anal sex is somehow an inherent inborn drive, or that individual who watch an extensive amount of pornography does not get desensitized from it. Simply suggest that you don't watch porn isn't enough. It's like claiming smoking doesn't increase the chance of lung cancer just because you have lung cancer without smoking, while living with people who smoke around you on a daily basis.

*snip*

You're comparing smoking-caused lung cancer, a physical malady with known causes and known pathologies, to getting desensitized by porn? That's more than a stretch. That's Stretch Armstrong.

One person watching and getting desensitized to porn doesn't automaticallt desensitize those around him. Whereas smoke is a pretty ubiquitous substance. I don't see the comparison.

*snip*

Right. So you're saying that your friend likes anal because she's a slut. Some friend you are.

Quite agreed! Shame!

Prostitution = having sex with people for money. Porn = having sex in front of cameras for money. Stripping = taking one's clothes off and dancing for money. Retail = selling shit for money. In all honesty, I fail to see much of a difference between working at Target and being a stripper. You provide your services, skill, appearance, talents and knowledge for money. Also, who says the girl at Target isn't interested in being kinky? You need to remember that to your friend, stripping is a job. It provides income. It doesn't automatically make her "kinky". Sure, being exposed to new and interesting sexual situations does provoke fantasy, but really you can't say she likes anal because she's a stripper.

Well said. (Didn't want you to think I never had anything good to say about you, AP.)

Lube.
Patience.

Pain.



Alcohol helps.

If done gently and patiently, pain need not enter the picture.

Homosexuality has nothing to do with anal sex. Homosexuality does not mean "an attraction to having anal sex", it means "an attraction to the same sex". There is a huge difference. When two men, for example, lust for each other, they lust for the man, his body, his penis, his appearance. They don't just lust for his asshole. It's the same with straight men. When a man wants to have sex with a woman, it's not usually just her vagina he lusts for.

I was going to reply to this with an eyebrow-raise and an "you sure about that? EVERY man? There are a lot of sport-fuckers out there..." or something, but then your next sentence, wholly unintentionally, contradicts you so perfectly, I think I'll just point it out (back up to the previous bolded sentence, and then read the next bolded sentence, for full effect):

He lusts for the woman as a hole, her breasts, her curves, her waist. When a man has sex with a woman, there's nothing homosexual about it. It doesn't matter whether it's in the ass or anywhere else. It's sex between a man and a woman.

Also, "froydian" = fail.

I'm sorry, AP, that was just too epic to pass up. Also, dead right on the spelling of Dr. Freud's name, but not a lot of people read him any more, and German is falling out of favor as a high school language. It is a laughable error, but not an incomprehensible one.

Well she might, if both of you are into that sort of thing.

As I said before, Germans.

*snip*

The desire for anal sex is inherent. Not because it is specifically a certain act, but because the desire for sex is inherent, because lots of people find the ass an attractive focus, and because that means we often end up with sex where ass and sex are connected.

I have read that the curve of the buttocks elicits a sexual response in men because they are similar in shape and presentation to breasts. Men mollified and aroused by breasts are therefore as mollified and aroused by a nice ass.

If you're honestly arguing that anal sex didn't exist before the universality of easy porn, (which is what you'd have to argue, if you're connecting it's apparent popularity with the relative acceptance of erotic imagery many places have now) you're probably not really qualified to discuss this subject.

I'm gonna go with this.

I fail to see how my argument is a global argument. An increase in trend does not mean it's a must for everyone and everything. Or that if you are into anal sex it must be due to pornography. An increase in trend simply means more people are into it now, that more people are affected by it directly or indirectly. Does that mean this is the only reason? No I did not say that, and if you interpreted it that way what can I say? I even went through great length explaining other alternative reasons for people having anal sex.

Does anyone else other than Grave_n_idle find that increase trend must = everyone?

Oh please. You made a universal statement: "more people are into it now", and asserted that porn is why. All it takes to disprove such a simple link is one non-example. You made those assertions as if there could be no other explanation. Could it be that the times have relaxed attitudes toward what we will and won't discuss among friends and elsewhere? Might that lead to more reported encounters than in decades past when people weren't as open to talking about anal sex? I don't know, and the thing is, neither do you.

Rather than quibble with the text, and rather than indulge your penchant for moving the goalposts further and further... why don't we look at what you actually did say?

"...the biggest drive for oral or anal sex is the over hype from pornography. Not only does it popularize it, it make it socially acceptable or even expected..."

(So... biggest drive is pornography. It popularises it (fairly universal?), makes it socially acceptable (that is universal), and even expected (seriously? wishful thinking, I think - but definitely universal).

"...You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted..."

"...It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off...

And, let's look at the shifting goalposts...

"...I am not saying people doesn't do it before the widespread of pornography. However I believe that pornography plays a very important role in the increase and popularize of anal sex as we see it today....

"...Really, you not watching porn and like anal sex doesn't mean pornography has no effect for those who watch it, and the overall modern culture..."

Bold emphasis added for the 'universal' bit.


Here's a thought, though - why do you say "more people are into it"?

What do you base that on? Clearly not any actual attention to history, or even the cultures that exist today.

You obviously have this pet theory. That's cute, but it's not worth a lot. Anal sex is commonplace outside of the human species. It has been commonplace WITHIN the human species, for about as long as we have history. It has been variously ubiquitous in various cultures.

The only difference NOW, to a hundred years ago (maybe), is that you MIGHT be more open discussing it.

Ba, still going on with this.

(So... biggest drive is pornography. It popularises it (fairly universal?), makes it socially acceptable (that is universal), and even expected (seriously? wishful thinking, I think - but definitely universal).

Popularity does not mean everyone. Just because Obama is popular doesn't mean everyone must like him or something.
Social acceptance is not universal. It is a change in trend. Means more people, not everyone.
Social expectation is the same thing. Claiming there's an social expectation of being skinny doesn't mean everyone expects it. It just mean it's a social trend.

"...You don't have to watch porn yourself, you just have to live in a society where pornography is widely accepted..."

"...It is silly to assume you can turn off the television. Television is all around you, you can't turn it off, only it can turn you off...

First sentence is an explanation of how social trend can affect someone without you necessary watching TV yourself.

Second sentence is a quote from Rick Roderick, if you got problem with it go complain to him. Not saying you have any proof that you are immune to the culture you live in or something.

So no I didn't change, because since the first sentence each time you claim global are on words that describe trends. Any further argument will degrade to the English language structure.

I have my theory sure, i cited it. Don't like it? Don't believe it.

Now let us look at your "pet theory", to claim that "it's natural" as the solo reason for anal sex. Talk about global claims. Might as well ask you to cite your claims with evidence now that you are at it.

*snipping away the drivel*

Has it ever occurred to you that people have anal sex simply because it feels good to them? You know, the same reason people have oral sex. I know, it must be a very novel idea to you.

Anal sex had been condemned since the times of the bible. And if it had to be condemned it is because it was being practiced...a lot.

Butt lovin' has been around for a long, looong time.

Oh please. You made a universal statement: "more people are into it now", and asserted that porn is why. All it takes to disprove such a simple link is one non-example. You made those assertions as if there could be no other explanation. Could it be that the times have relaxed attitudes toward what we will and won't discuss among friends and elsewhere? Might that lead to more reported encounters than in decades past when people weren't as open to talking about anal sex? I don't know, and the thing is, neither do you.

I am getting tired of this, let's go through the logic of this with some numbers

(note: NOT statics on desire for anal sex)
if 100 out of 10000 people were into something
if 25 of them are into it for reason A
25 for reason B
25 for reason C
then finally 25 for reason D
that makes up 100

then, due to some changes, say reason E, 30 more people are into it now.
now 130 people are into it, and look, reason E become the biggest reason when compare to everything else.

And I say, look because of reason E, "more people are into it now".

It doesn't mean all 10000 people are into it
it doesn't mean all 130 people are into it for reason E.

Finding one person who's into it for reason A, B, C or D, does not disprove the statement.

The only way you can disprove the statement is to

Show evidence that at least one of the other reason are > reason E. or
Discredit the source that shows reason E was the greatest of all other reasons.

I am getting tired of this, let's go through the logic of this with some numbers

(note: NOT statics on desire for anal sex)
if 100 out of 10000 people were into something
if 25 of them are into it for reason A
25 for reason B
25 for reason C
then finally 25 for reason D
that makes up 100

then, due to some changes, say reason E, 30 more people are into it now.
now 130 people are into it, and look, reason E become the biggest reason when compare to everything else.

And I say, look because of reason E, "more people are into it now".

It doesn't mean all 10000 people are into it
it doesn't mean all 130 people are into it for reason E.

Finding one person who's into it for reason A, B, C or D, does not disprove the statement.

The only way you can disprove the statement is to

Show evidence that at least one of the other reason are > reason E. or
Discredit the source that shows reason E was the greatest of all other reasons.

Of course there is the small matter of you haven't shown that anyone is into it for your reason "E"...
But don't let that little detail stop you

I am getting tired of this, let's go through the logic of this with some numbers

(note: NOT statics on desire for anal sex)
if 100 out of 10000 people were into something
if 25 of them are into it for reason A
25 for reason B
25 for reason C
then finally 25 for reason D
that makes up 100

then, due to some changes, say reason E, 30 more people are into it now.
now 130 people are into it, and look, reason E become the biggest reason when compare to everything else.

And I say, look because of reason E, "more people are into it now".

It doesn't mean all 10000 people are into it
it doesn't mean all 130 people are into it for reason E.

Finding one person who's into it for reason A, B, C or D, does not disprove the statement.

The only way you can disprove the statement is to

Show evidence that at least one of the other reason are > reason E. or
Discredit the source that shows reason E was the greatest of all other reasons.

I would say that more people are into anal sex because it feels good than because of porn. Just because everyone knows that when having sex, emulating porn is actually not that good an idea. I don't need to post any evidence, because you haven't posted any, just given us your alarmist bullcrap.

I would say that more people are into anal sex because it feels good than because of porn. Just because everyone knows that when having sex, emulating porn is actually not that good an idea. I don't need to post any evidence, because you haven't posted any, just given us your alarmist bullcrap.

As an example - a girl I know does watch porn, but she only watches girl-on-girl oral stuff. That's what trips her trigger.

Her preferred sex, is anal - because she cums much faster, much easier, much more intensely. (And stays horny - so she's ready for more 'conventional' fun)

The porn she watches has nothing to do with the sex she likes - it's ALL about the orgasm.

As an example - a girl I know does watch porn, but she only watches girl-on-girl oral stuff. That's what trips her trigger.

Her preferred sex, is anal - because she cums much faster, much easier, much more intensely. (And stays horny - so she's ready for more 'conventional' fun)

The porn she watches has nothing to do with the sex she likes - it's ALL about the orgasm.
Indeed. What people do, sexually, is mainly determined by what makes them feel good.

Why does she only watch girl-on-girl stuff? Is it because of how stupid guys in porn always are?

Of course there is the small matter of you haven't shown that anyone is into it for your reason "E"...
But don't let that little detail stop you

Actually I did cite my source to where I got my info on reason E.

You know I don't mind being wrong if they have a better citation that shows another reason being > reason E. The problem I am having right now is how everyone jump out and say having one person on reason A is enough to prove it wrong under the label of "global claims", which I did not make.

I have read that the curve of the buttocks elicits a sexual response in men because they are similar in shape and presentation to breasts. Men mollified and aroused by breasts are therefore as mollified and aroused by a nice ass.


I don't buy this one.

Breasts are nice. They're fun to play with, they get nice responses when you treat them right, etc. But they're not that sexual to me. Or rather - they're not especially sexual.

A nice ass, on the other hand...


I think it's more of an evolutionary thing - the best angle to come at your partner (in an evolutionary sense) is from behind, so a nice ass is just sexually wired-in as a trigger.

I am getting tired of this, let's go through the logic of this with some numbers

(note: NOT statics on desire for anal sex)
if 100 out of 10000 people were into something
if 25 of them are into it for reason A
25 for reason B
25 for reason C
then finally 25 for reason D
that makes up 100

then, due to some changes, say reason E, 30 more people are into it now.
now 130 people are into it, and look, reason E become the biggest reason when compare to everything else.

And I say, look because of reason E, "more people are into it now".

It doesn't mean all 10000 people are into it
it doesn't mean all 130 people are into it for reason E.

Finding one person who's into it for reason A, B, C or D, does not disprove the statement.

The only way you can disprove the statement is to

Show evidence that at least one of the other reason are > reason E. or
Discredit the source that shows reason E was the greatest of all other reasons.

Your "reason E" doesn't hold water. Why? The increase could just as easily be mroe people feeling more comfortable with stating reasons A through D to someone asking them questions about it during a survey! Your bloody-minded insistence that it HAS to be porn is unfounded, and frankly, bespeaks a very repressive nature.

Indeed. What people do, sexually, is mainly determined by what makes them feel good.

Why does she only watch girl-on-girl stuff? Is it because of how stupid guys in porn always are?

The girl-on-girl thing has several reasons, I think. One is obviously the 'fantasy' element, since she's a straight-ish girl. Another is probably that she's pretty picky about porn anyway, and only likes to look at (what she considers) attractive people (which doesn't equal 'porn-star standard' - she finds most people in porn pretty repulsive, and I have to agree with her, from what I've seen) and - as you say - guys in porn seem pretty stupid and gross.

I think also, the sort of porn she enjoys is maybe more made to satisfy a female audience, and so is more erotic. Maybe?

I have to agree. If I was going to watch porn, I have no interest in porn with guys in it.

I don't buy this one.

Breasts are nice. They're fun to play with, they get nice responses when you treat them right, etc. But they're not that sexual to me. Or rather - they're not especially sexual.

A nice ass, on the other hand...


I think it's more of an evolutionary thing - the best angle to come at your partner (in an evolutionary sense) is from behind, so a nice ass is just sexually wired-in as a trigger.

Like I said, I read it somewhere. Maybe it was FE's "Rick Rod Rick" dude. I'm not married to the idea. In fact, your angle of entry notion strikes me as familiar, too. I think it was an HBO documentary or something.

The girl-on-girl thing has several reasons, I think. One is obviously the 'fantasy' element, since she's a straight-ish girl. Another is probably that she's pretty picky about porn anyway, and only likes to look at (what she considers) attractive people (which doesn't equal 'porn-star standard' - she finds most people in porn pretty repulsive, and I have to agree with her, from what I've seen) and - as you say - guys in porn seem pretty stupid and gross.

I think also, the sort of porn she enjoys is maybe more made to satisfy a female audience, and so is more erotic. Maybe?

I have to agree. If I was going to watch porn, I have no interest in porn with guys in it.

That's why I like watching home-made porn. Fake tits and fake orgasms do not turn me on at all. Je suis une voyeur.

Claiming there's an social expectation of being skinny doesn't mean everyone expects it.


It... errr... does, actually.


Second sentence is a quote from Rick Roderick, if you got problem with it go complain to him.


He's not the one pushing his crap here. You are.

Don't pull this 'don't blame the messenger' tripe.


I have my theory sure, i cited it. Don't like it? Don't believe it.


I don't.


Now let us look at your "pet theory", to claim that "it's natural" as the solo reason for anal sex. Talk about global claims. Might as well ask you to cite your claims with evidence now that you are at it.

My argument basically boils down to 'people do it, because they like it'.

We could test it, scientifically.

Those that do it - do they have a statistically significant tendency towards liking it?

Those that don't do it - do they have a statistically significant tendency towards not liking it?


I think you'd probably get a MUCH higher correlation on THOSE factors, than on 'who watches porn'... don't you?

Like I said, I read it somewhere. Maybe it was FE's "Rick Rod Rick" dude. I'm not married to the idea. In fact, your angle of entry notion strikes me as familiar, too. I think it was an HBO documentary or something.

I've encountered the idea before, too - it just never held up.

To me.

It always seems to me that a partner's ass is considered 'sexual' in a different way to breasts, which seem to be more sensual. Maybe. But then, tht really could just be me. A girl massaging me with her breasts is sensual, erotic and arousing... A girl rubbing her ass against me... it's on!

Your "reason E" doesn't hold water. Why? The increase could just as easily be mroe people feeling more comfortable with stating reasons A through D to someone asking them questions about it during a survey! Your bloody-minded insistence that it HAS to be porn is unfounded, and frankly, bespeaks a very repressive nature.

At the very least we got over the whole "you are making a global claim" account. I could care less that I am wrong, but at least it's important that I make clear what what I said over what I did not.

Now as I said before, the claim that reason E as a huge influenced is not mine alone, but also from a book call "The Brain that Changes Itself" by Norman Doidge M.D., which has a whole chapter devoted to changes in sexual behaviors due to pornography. If anyone have a source more creditable than this one, that shows other reasons being a bigger factor, then let's see it.

I've encountered the idea before, too - it just never held up.

To me.

It always seems to me that a partner's ass is considered 'sexual' in a different way to breasts, which seem to be more sensual. Maybe. But then, tht really could just be me. A girl massaging me with her breasts is sensual, erotic and arousing... A girl rubbing her ass against me... it's on!

Oh, quite agreed.

At the very least we got over the whole "you are making a global claim" account. I could care less that I am wrong, but at least it's important that I make clear what what I said over what I did not.

Well, by not allowing for any other possible reason, you're at the very least being unilateral. Not much of an improvement.

Now as I said before, the claim that reason E as a huge influenced is not mine alone, but also from a book call "The Brain that Changes Itself" by Norman Doidge M.D., which has a whole chapter devoted to changes in sexual behaviors due to pornography. If anyone have a source more creditable than this one, that shows other reasons being a bigger factor, then let's see it.

Who did he study? How many were in the study? How was the study conducted? I'm not prepared to take the word of someone I've never heard of without seeing some methodology...and his motivation and/or financial backing.

The girl-on-girl thing has several reasons, I think. One is obviously the 'fantasy' element, since she's a straight-ish girl. Another is probably that she's pretty picky about porn anyway, and only likes to look at (what she considers) attractive people (which doesn't equal 'porn-star standard' - she finds most people in porn pretty repulsive, and I have to agree with her, from what I've seen) and - as you say - guys in porn seem pretty stupid and gross.

I think also, the sort of porn she enjoys is maybe more made to satisfy a female audience, and so is more erotic. Maybe?

I have to agree. If I was going to watch porn, I have no interest in porn with guys in it.

Hence why I prefer porn with no males. They all act like such douches when they're there, saying stupid, annoying shit all the time. And they're usually really stupid looking or just plain ugly. I especially hate it when the camera pans to the guy's face, which invariably has some idiotic expression.

Hence why I prefer porn with no males. They all act like such douches when they're there, saying stupid, annoying shit all the time. And they're usually really stupid looking or just plain ugly. I especially hate it when the camera pans to the guy's face, which invariably has some idiotic expression.

Not to provoke you, but do you know for certain that your face is never similarly contorted?

Not to provoke you, but do you know for certain that your face is never similarly contorted?

Oh, it probably is. But We don't have to look at ourselves. :)

Not to provoke you, but do you know for certain that your face is never similarly contorted?

Because it contorts in a smart, evil way. Not a retarded looking way.

My argument basically boils down to 'people do it, because they like it'.

We could test it, scientifically.

Those that do it - do they have a statistically significant tendency towards liking it?

Those that don't do it - do they have a statistically significant tendency towards not liking it?


I think you'd probably get a MUCH higher correlation on THOSE factors, than on 'who watches porn'... don't you?

I have no problem with people do it because they like it.

The problem comes when you consider rather this "liking" is a inborn or learned behavior. Yes normal people can learn to like things (this is close to a global claim, excluding certain people with mental disability that prohibit them to learn). Just because people like something doesn't mean they are born to like something. nature and nurture plays a part in behaviors.

So if you are really scientific about it you will have to prove that the liking in this particular case is primarily nature and not learned.

The problem comes when you consider rather this "liking" is a inborn or learned behavior. Yes normal people...


Wow... what? I hope you're not suggesting that people who like anal are not 'normal'?


...can learn to like things (this is close to a global claim, excluding certain people with mental disability that prohibit them to learn). Just because people like something doesn't mean they are born to like something. nature and nurture plays a part in behaviors.


I've heard that argument before. Theoretically, for it to apply and hold true, I should be able to condition myself to like pain, for example. And yet - I can't. I've even tried.

But, of course, it's irrelevent. If it feels good, it feels good. That's why you do it.


So if you are really scientific about it you will have to prove that the liking in this particular case is primarily nature and not learned.

Not at all. That's a different question. If the question is (as you originalyl suggested) to do with why anal sex is more readily accepted, and more prevalent (which I still think is bullshit), then the answer isn't about the psychological roots of pleasure.

Wow... what? I hope you're not suggesting that people who like anal are not 'normal'?

I've heard that argument before. Theoretically, for it to apply and hold true, I should be able to condition myself to like pain, for example. And yet - I can't. I've even tried.

But, of course, it's irrelevent. If it feels good, it feels good. That's why you do it.

Not at all. That's a different question. If the question is (as you originalyl suggested) to do with why anal sex is more readily accepted, and more prevalent (which I still think is bullshit), then the answer isn't about the psychological roots of pleasure.

No I am not suggesting that people who like anal sex are not normal. I only said people can learn to enjoy certain things, and that learning is normal.

And yes, not everything can be as easily "learned". Pain is one of those thing that has a whole wired system of it's own. It's inherently different from all other sensation neurologically speaking. That being said some people are masochist who enjoy the pain. Learned or not, well that's another one of those fiend of active research right now. Can't really make a definite claim on that.

Culture acceptance does lead to feeling good though in most cases. At the very least it frees up your orbitofrontal cortex from having to make you feel guilty afterward.

Y'know something, PWC? I don't care what you look like. Your ability to reason and your frankness make you SMOKIN' hot.


Aw. :D

Aw. :D

I, however, am not so easily impressed and want pics.

I, however, am not so easily impressed and want pics.

Too bad. Only special people get those. (By which I mean "people who have seen posts where I link to my photobucket account and figured out that they can look at the other pictures on there, and/or people on my spinoff forum of choice.") But you can always ask any of those people for an opinion on my smokin' versus non-smokin' status. :tongue:

Too bad. Only special people get those. (By which I mean "people who have seen posts where I link to my photobucket account and figured out that they can look at the other pictures on there, and/or people on my spinoff forum of choice.") But you can always ask any of those people for an opinion on my smokin' versus non-smokin' status. :tongue:

she makes a great catholic schoolgirl.

she makes a great catholic schoolgirl.

Why, thank you. My Catholic schoolteachers never seemed to think so, though. Me and my awkward questions in religion class... ;)

By the way, I have a question for you. It begins with a W and rhymes with "schmy the heck aren't you on AIM?" :tongue:

Maybe it's just me. It probably is. But I'm not sure I understand anal sex.

I get the basic physics of it, as far as what goes where, and I get it physiologically, as far as why some people get pleasure from it. And I understand the reason for doing it that way in a homosexual couple. There really aren't many other options.

But here's what I don't get. What is the apparent obsession among heterosexual males with anal sex? I hear so much about supposedly "straight" guys wanting anal sex. Why? Does it feel better? Is it a psychological thing involving some sort of dominance thing? (The female party is resistant, so being able to do it implies some sort of submission?) Is it an in-joke among men that I'm just not in on? Can someone explain this for me?

Just to be clear, to the gay-bashers and gay-basher-bashers, and gay-basher-basher-bashers, and so forth:
This is not a thread about homosexual intercourse.
This is not a thread about homosexuality in any other way.
This is not a covert way of me saying I don't like gay people. To quote Roy Zimmerman (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bja2ttzGOFM): "If you're two consenting adults, (and which of us isn't), it's nobody's business who you love, where you love, what equipment you might use. It's interesting, but it's nobody's business... Actually, the equipment is somebody's business."

I am a straight male anal sex enthusiast. I think I was born to be an anal sex enthusiast. Even as a young boy my earliest sexual thoughts involved anal sex. Just to be clear, I am talking about me being inside of a woman and I am not talking about pegging. I am pretty experienced with anal sex and I take it pretty seriously.

Psychologically and usually physically anal sex is so much more fun than vaginal, espescially with a woman who has a really great butt.

I also tend to prefer external ejaculation. It is just more pleasurable and comfortable for me. Internal ejaculation in a woman's mouth or vagina can be just too much for me. It can result in overstimulation that makes the orgasm unpleasant for me. I never had that problem ejaculating internally during anal sex.

However, anal sex can have its drawbacks. Some women do not have great buttsex asses. I am not talking about how the butt looks but how it feels when I have buttsex with them. Even a great butt can have off days typically after about 45 minutes of buttsex. The butt can get a bit too loose. This is one of the reasons why I recommend that buttsex is preceded by a couple of vaginal orgasms from vaginal sex. Also, a couple of vaginal orgasms can reduce insertion pains. Also, after about every 15 minutes of anal, the couple should take a break for a few minutes for other methods of penis stimulation while the lady's butt retightens. I would avoid vaginal intercourse after anal because it can lead to vaginal infections (although this can be done if condoms are used). Generally oral or handjobs are best during these breaks. I think that these are best particularly if they more or less alternate because you want to have some variety to avoid monotony and keep things exciting.

I do not know about the female resistance thingy that you mentioned. What did you mean?

'Pain' has no place on that list.


If done gently and patiently, pain need not enter the picture.

Unless you want it to. ;)

Unless you want it to. ;)

How you doin?

she makes a great catholic schoolgirl.

Hawt.

How you doin?

:D

she makes a great catholic schoolgirl.

Indeed she does.