NationStates Jolt Archive


Funny/Thoughtless Signs

SaintB
25-10-2008, 19:44
What funny signs have you seen, on the road, on hotels, restaurants; wherever?

I brought this up because today while doing some live broadcasts for work I passed by a sign on a motel that said: "WE OFFER HOURLY RATES! HAVE YOUR NEXT AFFAIR HERE!"

Some other ones I have seen over the years:

"BAD PARKING, GOOD FOOD!"
The all Famous "EAT HERE, GET GAS"
At a Wendy's: "ANYTHING YOU WANT, GET IT FROM WENDY"

And finally... at the local Dairy Queen they had a sign that said "HOT DIPS HERE!" me and a friend stopped by one night and removed the "I" from the sign for some really good laughs.
Vetalia
25-10-2008, 19:46
Obviously, the BLACK ANUS BURGER at Burger King.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 19:47
One my friend in Japan found.
"We serve people with tasty things"


I always laugh at the sign found at strip bars
"Live Girls"
as opposed to what? Dead Ones?
Dyakovo
25-10-2008, 19:49
I always laugh at the sign found at strip bars
"Live Girls"
as opposed to what? Dead Ones?

They just want to make sure of their clientelle, making sure to keep the necrophiliacs away...
SaintB
25-10-2008, 19:52
They just want to make sure of their clientelle, making sure to keep the necrophiliacs away...

Very thoughtful.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 19:54
They just want to make sure of their clientelle, making sure to keep the necrophiliacs away...

with the "no touch" laws in Hawaii. Necrophiliacs would be easy money. Charge them to watch a dead body for 5 minutes then charge em again for the next 5 minutes...
Cabra West
25-10-2008, 19:58
I think one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen wasn't a sign, it was on the menu in our canteen one day : "Pizza with mushrooms and aborigenes".




Turned out to be aubergines, which was a bit disappointing really.
SaintB
25-10-2008, 19:59
I think one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen wasn't a sign, it was on the menu in our canteen one day : "Pizza with mushrooms and aborigenes".




Turned out to be aubergines, which was a bit disappointing really.

It would be.
Extreme Ironing
25-10-2008, 20:05
I was once on a plane and beside me, inside the window (between the plates of glass) was a sticker that read something like, "Do not place item in washing machine or dryer". Very odd.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 20:08
I think one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen wasn't a sign, it was on the menu in our canteen one day : "Pizza with mushrooms and aborigenes".




Turned out to be aubergines, which was a bit disappointing really.

not a sign... but my friends once tried to order a pizza in japan. when they asked how big it was they were told "15 meters". :p
SaintB
25-10-2008, 20:13
not a sign... but my friends once tried to order a pizza in japan. when they asked how big it was they were told "15 meters". :p

Now that is a pizza!
Cabra West
25-10-2008, 20:15
Now that is a pizza!

Sounds more like a trampoline! ;)
Tapao
25-10-2008, 20:23
They just want to make sure of their clientelle, making sure to keep the necrophiliacs away...

We're always discriminated against. :(
Heikoku 2
25-10-2008, 20:25
We're always discriminated against. :(

The fact that your kind ends sentences with prepositions doesn't help, either. What do you do that for?

Relax, not REALLY starting a spelling war, but needed the joke. *Snickers
Tapao
25-10-2008, 20:47
I've got another sentence for you, but that too ends in a proposition. :P :)
JuNii
25-10-2008, 20:48
Now that is a pizza!

Sounds more like a trampoline! ;)

LOL... you can imagine their dissappointment when their 15 centimeter pizza arrived.
Katganistan
25-10-2008, 20:51
A dry cleaning shop with this sign in the window: "We do spot cleaning."

Out in front? Two telephone lines FILLED with pigeons, shoulder to shoulder.
SaintB
25-10-2008, 20:55
A dry cleaning shop with this sign in the window: "We do spot cleaning."

Out in front? Two telephone lines FILLED with pigeons, shoulder to shoulder.

HAHA! That's either good business or bad business placement.
Cabra West
25-10-2008, 20:56
LOL... you can imagine their dissappointment when their 15 centimeter pizza arrived.

I'm a woman... trust me, I know about that kind of disappointment. ;)
JuNii
25-10-2008, 20:56
HAHA! That's either good business or bad business placement.

or a statement to some well trained pigeons. :D
SaintB
25-10-2008, 20:59
LOL... you can imagine their dissappointment when their 15 centimeter pizza arrived.

Poor guys...
Vault 10
25-10-2008, 21:05
This one was not found by me, but it's still my favorite.


http://www.freewebs.com/vault_10/Bunker.png
Ifreann
25-10-2008, 21:05
I'm a woman... trust me, I know about that kind of disappointment. ;)

Well really, what kind of man can claim to be 100 times larger than he actually is and be mature enough to get near a conscious human woman?
Poliwanacraca
25-10-2008, 21:09
This one: http://boingboing.net/2008/07/15/chinese-restaurant-c.html
Adunabar
25-10-2008, 21:13
Sorry to run the nuclear bunker sign but :http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kelvedon_Hatch_Secret_Nuclear_Bunker
JuNii
25-10-2008, 21:19
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/005_banana_slug.jpg
JuNii
25-10-2008, 21:21
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/011_bone_lick.jpg
:D
Smunkeeville
25-10-2008, 21:24
In the front window of the grocery store I frequent is a bright yellow piece of paper it says:

NO SHIRT
NO SHOES
NO SKATESHOES
NO SERVICE

I lol'd the first time I saw it.....and my daughter looked at it and said "I don't think that means what they think it means" and we lol'd together.
Maineiacs
25-10-2008, 21:25
One of my favorite odd translations was from the instructions from a Japanese-made food processor:

"Not to be used for the other use."
Melkor Unchained
25-10-2008, 21:28
http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f222/ganjmahal/1344292659_m.jpg

Classic.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 21:31
took me a while to 'get' this one...
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/026_gay_choir.jpg
Wilgrove
25-10-2008, 21:42
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/049_god.jpg
Poliwanacraca
25-10-2008, 21:46
took me a while to 'get' this one...
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/026_gay_choir.jpg

Eh, it'd be funnier if it weren't clearly labeled as being the middle of summer, when one would presume that the concert is just using the school's performance space rather than being in any way a school event. (Plus, y'know, there are concerts for deaf people, but admittedly choral music would rarely be the first choice.)
JuNii
25-10-2008, 22:07
Eh, it'd be funnier if it weren't clearly labeled as being the middle of summer, when one would presume that the concert is just using the school's performance space rather than being in any way a school event. (Plus, y'know, there are concerts for deaf people, but admittedly choral music would rarely be the first choice.)

except...
1) some states have year long schools. so a school being open during the summer isn't a far fetched idea
2) the phrase "Open to the Public" or "Tickets on Sale" would normally accompany such an event if it's not a school fuction and is open to the public
3) why overthink it?

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/052_handwash.jpg
they must be soo proud of that honor.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 22:17
now this is a movie I'd pay to see in the theatre!

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/078_triple_feature.jpg
Adunabar
25-10-2008, 22:22
now this is a movie i'd pay to see in the theatre!

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/078_triple_feature.jpg

EDIT: Fucking capitals on this forum.
Hayteria
25-10-2008, 22:25
I remember coming across some of these on some thread about "contextual advertising" on another site so I figured I'd look them up and link to them here

http://failblog.wordpress.com/files/2008/08/fail-owned-billboard-fail.jpg

And I also came across this site, which lists a bunch of poorly placed signs, as well as some poorly placed Internet ads...

http://daily-fun-stuff.blogspot.com/2007/09/misplaced-ads.html

And then there's this, which isn't so much about the signs themselves as the angle from which they are seen...

http://newmedia.funnyjunk.com/pictures/christ-died-for-our-dunkin-donuts.jpg
Poliwanacraca
25-10-2008, 22:48
now this is a movie I'd pay to see in the theatre!

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/078_triple_feature.jpg

Now that one I like. :D
Svalbardania
25-10-2008, 23:23
I went on holiday once, and sprawled erotically on the beach there was this giant, rock-like phallis jutting sensually into the highly aroused water, and placed like a cock ring on top of this thrusting member was sign which read "Caution: Groyne closed. Please use other entrance."

I wish I'd had a camera.
I think I need to get out more.
JuNii
25-10-2008, 23:55
I went on holiday once, and sprawled erotically on the beach there was this giant, rock-like phallis jutting sensually into the highly aroused water, and placed like a cock ring on top of this thrusting member was sign which read "Caution: Groyne closed. Please use other entrance."

I wish I'd had a camera.
I think I need to get out more.

I wish you had also. I want to see what Highly Aroused Water looks like. :D
Callisdrun
26-10-2008, 00:19
http://members.optushome.com.au/esholroyd/phat_phuc.jpg

Descriptive

http://www.amazingincredible.com/pictures/74-1.jpg

That would explain a lot.
Gauntleted Fist
26-10-2008, 00:30
http://media.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/370286/572444.jpg
http://msp185.photobucket.com/albums/x167/kyo-kun-is-hot/funny-signs-warning.jpg
Aceopolis
26-10-2008, 00:49
Two I've seen:

On a music store-Bach in an Minuet

In a store filled with many entertaining goods-No Trespassing, Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again
Wilgrove
26-10-2008, 00:52
http://msp185.photobucket.com/albums/x167/kyo-kun-is-hot/funny-signs-warning.jpg

I was actually sold to the freak show. :(
Gauntleted Fist
26-10-2008, 00:53
I was actually sold to the freak show. :(What do you want me to do about it?
...Uh. ...Buy you back? :confused:
Muravyets
26-10-2008, 02:31
Not a sign but best job ad I ever saw. Back in the 80s, in the NY Village Voice, a weekly paper. It ran in two issues.

Week 1:

Wanted: Yo-Yo Demonstrators. Apply in person to Greg at <New Jersey address of Duncan Yo-Yo's>.

Week 2:

Wanted: Skilled Yo-Yo Demonstrators. Apply in person to Greg at <New Jersey address of Duncan Yo-Yo's>.
Neesika
26-10-2008, 03:11
My favourite sign says "Best place in town to take a leak".

Then you realise it's an autobody shop:)
Nanatsu no Tsuki
26-10-2008, 03:15
http://www.premierphotographer.com/funny_signs_5.jpg

I totally would.
SaintB
26-10-2008, 03:16
http://www.premierphotographer.com/funny_signs_5.jpg

I totally would.

I am SaintB, and I endorse this message.
Gauntleted Fist
26-10-2008, 03:17
I am SaintB, and I endorse this message.I am not SaintB, and I endorse this message.
Nanatsu no Tsuki
26-10-2008, 03:19
http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/petros753/funny_signs_gallery_1.jpg

*shakes head and leaves*
Gauntleted Fist
26-10-2008, 03:20
http://lh6.ggpht.com/spauley2/R591G-ezEgI/AAAAAAAABaU/1Lv96B-Z8ZM/s512/IMG_0798.JPG
Only 290? :(
Dumb Ideologies
26-10-2008, 03:21
Oh my, this thread is hilarious :)
Nanatsu no Tsuki
26-10-2008, 03:22
http://media3.guzer.com/pictures/funny_sign_dogs.jpg

I knew Canucks had problems...:(
Intestinal fluids
26-10-2008, 03:52
A sign on the wall at the front door of a hospital


Family Planning: Please use rear entrance
SaintB
26-10-2008, 03:59
A sign on the wall at the front door of a hospital


Family Planning: Please use rear entrance

I do so love that one... got a pic somewhere....
Redwulf
26-10-2008, 04:06
I think one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen wasn't a sign, it was on the menu in our canteen one day : "Pizza with mushrooms and aborigenes".

A local Chinese restaurant used to offer "Strange Flavored Chicken". Turned out to be Orange flavored when I ordered it out of curiosity.
Gauntleted Fist
26-10-2008, 04:11
http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/115_ultimatum.jpg
Maximum effect!

http://blog.evaria.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/10.jpg
Wait, here's another!
Muravyets
26-10-2008, 04:16
A local Chinese restaurant used to offer "Strange Flavored Chicken". Turned out to be Orange flavored when I ordered it out of curiosity.
I have a restaurant that serves Strange Flavor Chicken, too, but it's not the Orange Flavor dish. It's one of my favorite things -- rich thick sauce with a little oyster sauce base, tons of vegies, etc.

Another favorite that I used to get from a vaguely Thai pan-Asian place is "Evil Jungle Prince." Some sort of stir-fry.
Trans Fatty Acids
26-10-2008, 05:00
Favorite one that I actually saw myself (not just a photo on the web) was a Burger King sign advertising SPICY TENDER CRIPS. Didn't know the Bloods had a share in BK...
Builic
26-10-2008, 05:10
Sounds more like a trampoline! ;)

Huge ass trampoline
The Hallet
26-10-2008, 05:25
A sometimes-lurker appears to post: this (http://bp0.blogger.com/_T4T67v_yMjg/SIuRiDBzz3I/AAAAAAAAANc/dfLWJLLvH34/s1600-h/P1000349.JPG), courtesy of our friends in British Columbia.

Admittedly, this is probably only funny to me, but... eh.
Poliwanacraca
26-10-2008, 06:22
I have a restaurant that serves Strange Flavor Chicken, too, but it's not the Orange Flavor dish. It's one of my favorite things -- rich thick sauce with a little oyster sauce base, tons of vegies, etc.

Another favorite that I used to get from a vaguely Thai pan-Asian place is "Evil Jungle Prince." Some sort of stir-fry.

I've actually seen Evil Jungle Princess on the menu at more than one Thai place. I had no idea it came in a masculine version! :tongue:
Vampire Knight Zero
26-10-2008, 08:47
http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images/2007-06/this-is-sparta-caution-cone.jpg

I've been waiting a long time to pull this one out. :D
SaintB
26-10-2008, 11:33
http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images/2007-06/this-is-sparta-caution-cone.jpg

I've been waiting a long time to pull this one out. :D

AAnd it was SOOO worth the wait no? Glad I could provide you the oppurtunity.
Tech-gnosis
26-10-2008, 12:36
http://neatorama.cachefly.net/images/2007-06/this-is-sparta-caution-cone.jpg

I've been waiting a long time to pull this one out. :D

It looks like someone it tipping another guy over with a gigantic phallus. :tongue:
SaintB
26-10-2008, 12:38
It ;ools like someone it tipping another guy over with a gigantic phallus. :tongue:

huh?
Tech-gnosis
26-10-2008, 12:43
Typo
SaintB
26-10-2008, 12:45
Typo

Thanks for the claryfication man. Funny way of looking at it lol.
UNIverseVERSE
26-10-2008, 12:48
AAnd it was SOOO worth the wait no? Glad I could provide you the oppurtunity.

I've actually made one of those signs in real life before. However, I had the guy doing a flying kick.

Did make it slightly wierd to see the picture there.
SaintB
26-10-2008, 12:53
I've actually made one of those signs in real life before. However, I had the guy doing a flying kick.

Did make it slightly wierd to see the picture there.

Heheheh. When I was in college I had to walk through a union labor strike that lasted a few days. After being made late to school I made up a picket sign that read:

"GET BACK TO WORK SO I CAN GET BACK TO SCHOOL!" thats about the only sign I have ever made made. I photoshopped a stop sign once to read "NO GO"
Cabra West
26-10-2008, 13:32
Well really, what kind of man can claim to be 100 times larger than he actually is and be mature enough to get near a conscious human woman?

Oh, you'd be surprised... ;)
SaintB
26-10-2008, 15:30
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v628/SaintB/clinton_sexoffender.jpg

I like
Vampire Knight Zero
26-10-2008, 16:36
It looks like someone it tipping another guy over with a gigantic phallus. :tongue:

Why is it that someone always sees something sexual? :D
Tmutarakhan
26-10-2008, 20:53
Sorry I don't have pics.

Vampire's "CAUTION" sign reminds me of one I saw where the Spanish translation "CUIDADO: PISO MOJADO" was altered to "CUIDADO: PISO ONDE FLORO".

Saint's Arkansas sign reminds me of "Arkansas, the Natural State. Where Life is Nasty, Brutish, and Short."

And there is the drugstore in Detroit with the sign:
GOD IS LOVE
LIQUOR
LOTTO
KENO
New Limacon
26-10-2008, 21:02
Too many; I'll just post a link (http://www.alphadictionary.com/fun/signs.html).

My favorite: Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
Dont Eat the Kittens
26-10-2008, 21:10
"The maid is there for your use. Please take advantage of her."
Nanatsu no Tsuki
27-10-2008, 20:18
Vampire's "CAUTION" sign reminds me of one I saw where the Spanish translation "CUIDADO: PISO MOJADO" was altered to "CUIDADO: PISO ONDE FLORO".

LOL! I had to read that a few times and then use an English accent to understand it.:D
Sumamba Buwhan
27-10-2008, 21:13
In Calif I saw a truck with this on the side:

Culver City Meat Company
You can't beat our meat
H N Fiddlebottoms VIII
27-10-2008, 23:21
There's a realtor near where I work, a Mr. Shkam it seems, which is such an unfortunate name, for a realtor.
Shkam Realty.
JuNii
27-10-2008, 23:59
There's a realtor near where I work, a Mr. Shkam it seems, which is such an unfortunate name, for a realtor.
Shkam Realty.

I read somewhere in japan was a Travel agency called Kinki Tours.
Vampire Knight Zero
28-10-2008, 00:41
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/102/294663599_cf07bec3e9_b.jpg
Wilgrove
28-10-2008, 00:56
-snip-

The sign itself isn't funny, however....

http://www.internetgamesfree.com/games/images/SpeedEnforcement1.jpg
Vampire Knight Zero
28-10-2008, 00:58
http://mcadams.posc.mu.edu/blog/signs10.jpg