NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/10/10/shark.virgin.birth.ap/index.html

Kneel and pray to your new shark Savior!

Interesting.

Scientists have confirmed the second case of a "virgin birth" in a shark.

Ah! This might be the anti-Shark! :p

And thus begins The Greatest Story Ever Told:

Jawsus Christ Supershark

Jawsus Christ Supershark

It shalt be toldeth for the ages, and all shall know that Jawsus Christ is his son.
(Come on, god tried making a woman pregnant, look how that turned out! Ofcourse he must experiment alittle)
Also, i lol'd

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/10/10/shark.virgin.birth.ap/index.html

Kneel and pray to your new shark Savior!
Heh. A messiah for our times.

And Lo' The Tiger Sharks questioned the Holy Sharks identity and took him from this world.

I laughed even as I imagined the bolt from the blue.

Parthenogenesis is badass.

Parthenogenesis is badass.

Especially among the asari.

I laughed even as I imagined the bolt from the blue.

I let your fag comment slide, but this is ridiculous. Please. please, PLEASE make some less makes-me-suicidal jokes.

Especially among the asari.

Yeah, I suspect the asari males died out quickly once the females realized they could produce children all on their own.

"this is my body, take and eat it..."
or in other words...
That is what happened to the tiny hammerhead pup in the Omaha case.

"By the time they could realize what they were looking at, something munched the baby," he said of aquarium workers. The remains of the pup were used for the DNA testing.

On a more serious note, there is a species of Crayfish that is all female. no males. and they reproduce asexually. by the berry-load.

Well, as long as I don't start seeing images of the holy Shark in my toast...

Well, as long as I don't start seeing images of the holy Shark in my toast...

Or in your mum´s knickers or the like (like some Mexican lady did)...:tongue:

Well, as long as I don't start seeing images of the holy Shark in my toast...
*Random guy*IT'S THE HOLY SHARK! HE'S IN MY TOAST!

*I walk by, grab the toast, eat it* Not anymore.:wink:

Or in your mum´s knickers or the like (like some Mexican lady did)...:tongue:

Erm... gross. :eek:

Erm... gross. :eek:

I know... *nod* Disturbing...

I know... *nod* Disturbing...

I know that a while back, someone sold a "Divine sandwhich" With the image of Jesus on it. Fetched a couple of thousand on Ebay. :eek:

Or in your mum´s knickers or the like (like some Mexican lady did)...:tongue:

"I got Jesus in my knickers"
"oh... kinky"

I know that a while back, someone sold a "Divine sandwhich" With the image of Jesus on it. Fetched a couple of thousand on Ebay. :eek:

I just hope the sandwich has been divinely preserved or something... Just imagine maggots festering on it days later after buying it? Flies standing on Jesus Shark´s holy image and the like. Oh gods, I am going to hell!:eek2:

I just hope the sandwich has been divinely preserved or something... Just imagine maggots festering on it days later after buying it? Flies standing on Jesus Shark´s holy image and the like. Oh gods, I am going to hell!:eek2:

It was preserved, and it now sits in some guys private collection. Nutter. :p

"I got Jesus in my knickers"
"oh... kinky"

Kinky Jesus...:hail:

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/10/10/shark.virgin.birth.ap/index.html

Kneel and pray to your new shark Savior!

Heresy. The jesus shark savior (http://www.mollyknight.com/journalism/TKThingsJoeThornton.jpg) has already come to us.

"I got Jesus in my knickers"
"oh... kinky"

That's not the part that freaks me out, to be honest.

Finding the images of dead Jews graven in your panties? I'm strangely comfortable with that.

But... how does someone find this stuff... in their mom's panties.

Eww?

Parthenogenesis is badass.

Ain't even funny. I got kicked out of RE in the third year for pointing out that Jesus could have been parthenogenetic...

My mum has awesome underwear!:D

My mum has awesome underwear!:D

Does it have sharks in it?

Does it have sharks in it?

Unfortunately no.:( But I´m keeping my fingers crossed.:D

Shark infested underwear... sounds erotic. :p

Shark infested underwear... sounds erotic. :p

Dude... that's her mum you're hitting on...

Virgin births, infanticide/cannibalism, investigation of maternal underwear. I love everything about this thread.

Dude... that's her mum you're hitting on...

Actually it was the idea I found erotic. ;)

As if human single mum's were bad enough, it's spread to the fishes.

Actually it was the idea I found erotic. ;)

you find sharks in the underwear erotic... what about crabs? :p

you find sharks in the underwear erotic... what about crabs? :p

Depends on the species. :p

As if human single mum's were bad enough, it's spread to the fishes.

You know it's only a matter of time before she hits the dole and ruins the whole aquatic economy.

As if human single mum's were bad enough, it's spread to the fishes.

Yeah - but have you seen how the shark social program works?

Unwanted offspring? Bring it to term - then eat it.

Sharks must be Republicans.

Dude... that's her mum you're hitting on...

My mum´s gorgeous.:wink:

My mum´s gorgeous.:wink:

I already have someone anyway. ;)

I already have someone anyway. ;)

I know you do, but my mum´s gorgeous anyway.:D

I know you do, but my mum´s gorgeous anyway.:D

I bet she is. :D

I bet she is. :D

Oh, I know she is.:D

Oh, I know she is.:D

Well then, good. :p

Well then, good. :p

But I still haven´t found a Jesus Shark image in her knickers...:tongue:

But I still haven´t found a Jesus Shark image in her knickers...:tongue:

When you do, get back to me. ;)

My mum´s gorgeous.:wink:

Aye. It's just that, down our way it's considered inappropriate to tell a girl you're hitting on her mum. Or dad... we're very equal-opportunities...

with pics of the image in her knickers.

Well, I´m strange and unusual so, my mum is too.

Well, I´m strange and unusual so, my mum is too.

Excellent. :cool:

Virgin births, infanticide/cannibalism, investigation of maternal underwear. I love everything about this thread.

Yes. Came out better than I expected. :)

You know a komodo dragon (or some lizard) bewat the shark to it
It gave a virgin birth

You know a komodo dragon (or some lizard) bewat the shark to it
It gave a virgin birth

Sharks have better publicity agents.

BTW 3bil 0tt0 ftw

Thank you?
Other thing, the chupacabra was spotted on 8-8-08, 888 is a number asociated with Jesus

Jumpin Shark Jesus! Not one but two Shark Jesi?

Jumpin Shark Jesus! Not one but two Shark Jesi?

Clearly Jawsus is cloning himself in preparation for the upcoming Jesii War.

Clearly Jawsus is cloning himself in preparation for the upcoming Jesii War.

I, for one, welcome our Jesii overlords.

Thank you?
Other thing, the chupacabra was spotted on 8-8-08, 888 is a number asociated with Jesus

I thought that was 777. Or Jhonen Vasquez has lead me astray.