NationStates Jolt Archive

Spin-off from the "different is cool" thread. This started me thinking about what makes a person popular, unpopular or just there.

Popular people can be broken down pretty much into two basic types (with, of course, sub-types and variations). 1. the popular because I'm a real bitch or son of one type. These are the ones that are so elegantly caricatured in teenage shows like Daria and Sabrina, the Teenaged Witch. People like Sandy Griffith and her mother or the power-hungry cheerleader, Libby. They're popular because people fear them. 2. The other type is almost impossible to caricature, they're the people who are popular because they are genuinely nice. You see attempts to caricature them (Jody Landon and Mack in Daria, Harvey in Sabrina), but they don't really succeed.

Unpopular people seem to come in many types, but, when you get down to it, there really is only one type. Regardless of physical attributes, for some reason, usually a personality trait like self-pity or arrogance, they're unpleasant to be around. There are very few like this.

Most people are the "just there" types. They have a some friends, but not many. They participate, but not a lot. They're just there. They're not unpleasant people, they're just people.

I'm sure you NSGers have POVs about this. I'd like to hear them.

In my school, it was the arrogant ones that were the most popular.

I have no idea of how it works.

It's not arrogance that makes people popular, but confidence - which can sometimes spill over into arrogance. That said it's not just confidence. There are other things as well, but they're harder to explain. It's like all popular people are confident, but not all confident people are popular.

Maybe it's the difference between people are happy to tell others what to do and those who really don't want hanger-on-ers. Confident people who don't tell others what to do tend to become outcasts, whereas those who do tend to gather followers.

I'd rather be interesting than popular. *nod*

Nationstates stole my popularity <_<

Yes, I blame you lot. I was on here when I should have been out having fun and partying.

Damn you NS & Max Barry...


However, for a rough version of your option 2: You have Ted, Robyn, Lilly & Marshal from How I met your mother who seem both nice and popular, whereas there is Barney (the shifty player type) who seems to not have any friends apart from the other 4.

Having been around quite a bit (5 schools, 2 countries etc.) and having been both popular and outright unpopular, I can say it entirely depends. The most important thing is culture. In some cultures, being original, independent and even an arsehole (if done with due intelligence - i.e. witty sarcasm, as opposed to moronic insulting people) can be appreciated, while in others there is only so much you can stand out from the crowd, before you end up isolating yourself.

Secondly, people will forgive other people absolutely anything, as long as it conforms to their expectations. And this is the most important thing. People don't judge others by what they are, but by what they expect them to be like, or how they expect them to behave. All people project their personality through the medium of other people's expectations, whether they know it or not, and popular and unpopular people just happen to project things like confidence and self-reliance, but more importantly their own views and opinions on things.

It does of course depend on the audience whether the particular personality and views are well or ill received, and result in popularity or infamy, but in essence, that's what it is all about - projecting expectations.

I'm unpopular because (I won't deny it) I'm an arrogant, self-centered nerd. So it kind of fits in your theory. But I like being that.:wink: