NationStates Jolt Archive


Would you want to know?

Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 13:45
If your sig other was making inappropriate comments to your friend, should they tell you?

What if you were newly dating?

What if you were seriously dating?

If you were married?

At what point in your relationship would you want to know? How inappropriate would the behavior have to be?
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 13:49
What kind of inappropriate comments are we talking about here?
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 13:53
Things that would qualify as sexual harrassment......
Lapse
08-08-2008, 13:55
Sexual harassment is never justified/allowed imo.

Ask them to stop (nicely, no need to destroy a relationship over a misundestanding). If they don't, then it needs to go further.
Call to power
08-08-2008, 13:56
yes they should, admittedly I might see it wrong and kill them anyway but its the thought that counts :)

*comments on Smunkeeville's dish rack*

Sexual harassment is never justified/allowed imo.

what if she has large boobies? or its a sci-fi convention?
Kahanistan
08-08-2008, 13:56
While I wouldn't care if someone I was newly dating was flirting with another guy, if it rose to the level of sexual harassment then I'd like to know.
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 13:57
If your friend isn't telling you, there isn't much you can do. If she/he does tell, the sooner the better. It's good for both you and your friend. That way you can tell the guy to straight up and fly right or fly out the door.
Johnny B Goode
08-08-2008, 13:59
If your sig other was making inappropriate comments to your friend, should they tell you?

What if you were newly dating?

What if you were seriously dating?

If you were married?

At what point in your relationship would you want to know? How inappropriate would the behavior have to be?

I'd want to know if I was seriously dating. And the other person would have to respond for it to be a serious enough problem to throw in the towel. Otherwise I'd try to talk it out.
Lapse
08-08-2008, 14:03
what if she has large boobies? or its a sci-fi convention?
Oh that's completely different. Don't twist my words. :mad:
Lackadaisical1
08-08-2008, 14:08
I'd want to know no matter what

I'd want to know if I was seriously dating. And the other person would have to respond for it to be a serious enough problem to throw in the towel. Otherwise I'd try to talk it out.

hmm.. What difference would it make if the friend responded to them? The real problem would be your SO not liking/respecting you.
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 14:11
what if she has large boobies? or its a sci-fi convention?

Hahahahaha! How many girls actually go to those things? You only see them at the Sci-Fi Con if there's an Anime con in the same area! :D
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:11
I'd want to know no matter what

I would too, but I'm trying to figure out if it's just because I'm an information junkie or if it's the general consensus.
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:12
Hahahahaha! How many girls actually go to those things? You only see them at the Sci-Fi Con if there's an Anime con in the same area! :D

:rolleyes:
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 14:15
:rolleyes:

What's the matter? Someone take your sense of humour out back and shoot it Old Yeller style? :D



I was kiddin' on the last post. Methinks the sarcasm machine got broke real good.
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:18
What's the matter? Someone take your sense of humour out back and shoot it Old Yeller style? :D



I was kiddin' on the last post. Methinks the sarcasm machine got broke real good.

I thought I was being playful? ....... it's a cute smiley.

I'm a little off kilter today.
Hotwife
08-08-2008, 14:18
What's the matter? Someone take your sense of humour out back and shoot it Old Yeller style? :D



I was kiddin' on the last post. Methinks the sarcasm machine got broke real good.

Remember the movie Old Yeller? Everybody loved him. He brought us our slippers. We gave him cookies. But when Old Yeller gets rabies, you shoot him in the fucking head. It’s that simple.
Lackadaisical1
08-08-2008, 14:19
I would too, but I'm trying to figure out if it's just because I'm an information junkie or if it's the general consensus.

hmm... well I'm a bit of an "information junkie" too. But in this case I think it'd also be a pretty serious offense, depending on what you mean by inappropriate. If they're sexual advances, then thats something I'd more than just want to know, but would be necessary in continuing (or probably not) my relationship with the person. If inappropriate as in insulting, then I'd probably think it was funny, but that all depends on the exact nature of the insult(s).
Hotwife
08-08-2008, 14:20
is this happening to you smunk?
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:22
hmm... well I'm a bit of an "information junkie" too. But in this case I think it'd also be a pretty serious offense, depending on what you mean by inappropriate. If they're sexual advances, then thats something I'd more than just want to know, but would be necessary in continuing (or probably not) my relationship with the person. If inappropriate as in insulting, then I'd probably think it was funny, but that all depends on the exact nature of the insult(s).

Interesting.
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 14:22
Remember the movie Old Yeller? Everybody loved him. He brought us our slippers. We gave him cookies. But when Old Yeller gets rabies, you shoot him in the fucking head. It’s that simple.

I know what happens. It just seems to me that some people have a broken sense of humour that had the same fate.
Hotwife
08-08-2008, 14:26
I know what happens. It just seems to me that some people have a broken sense of humour that had the same fate.

Just remember that a sense of humor can't get rabies.
Cabra West
08-08-2008, 14:30
How good a friend are we talking here?
A really good friend, I would want to know. Cause they would know me and would know what kind of behaviour I would consider weird in someone I was dating.
A mere acquaintance, I would politely tell them to mind their own business. And maybe check with my SO what his version of the story is.
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:33
How good a friend are we talking here?
A really good friend, I would want to know. Cause they would know me and would know what kind of behaviour I would consider weird in someone I was dating.
A mere acquaintance, I would politely tell them to mind their own business. And maybe check with my SO what his version of the story is.

I'm not so much interested in what you would do with the information, more would you want it or not.
Cabra West
08-08-2008, 14:38
I'm not so much interested in what you would do with the information, more would you want it or not.

I think I'd want it.
But depending who it came from, I would take it with a sizeable pinch of salt.
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:41
I think I'd want it.
But depending who it came from, I would take it with a sizeable pinch of salt.

Would it hurt your friendship? Say if they told you and you decided it wasn't worth following up on? Would it hurt it if they didn't tell you and you found out later?
Lacadaemon
08-08-2008, 14:44
Define inappropriate.

Though I probably wouldn't care one way or the other.
Smunkeeville
08-08-2008, 14:50
Define inappropriate.

Though I probably wouldn't care one way or the other.

Sexually propositioning your friend.
Katganistan
08-08-2008, 15:26
Hahahahaha! How many girls actually go to those things? You only see them at the Sci-Fi Con if there's an Anime con in the same area! :D

Try Lunacon; there are lots of girls there.
Cabra West
08-08-2008, 15:26
Would it hurt your friendship? Say if they told you and you decided it wasn't worth following up on? Would it hurt it if they didn't tell you and you found out later?

I don't think I'd be hurt if I found out later. I would assume they weren't sure if they should tell me, and didn't want to hurt me.

If they told me and I decided it wasn't worth following up on I don't think it would hurt our friendship. Unless they expected me to follow up and get upset cause I don't.
Kryozerkia
08-08-2008, 15:38
I thought I was being playful? ....... it's a cute smiley.

I'm a little off kilter today.

It looked rather disapproving. Seriously, for that, we need the trout-smack smilie...

Just remember that a sense of humor can't get rabies.

Then you need to get out more. *nods*
Lacadaemon
08-08-2008, 15:49
Sexually propositioning your friend.

I still probably wouldn't care if the friend told me or not to be honest. I can see the reasoning either way.
Johnny B Goode
08-08-2008, 16:10
I'd want to know no matter what



hmm.. What difference would it make if the friend responded to them? The real problem would be your SO not liking/respecting you.

What I said was if my friend responded, I'd probably give up. Otherwise, I'd try to talk it out.
Lackadaisical1
08-08-2008, 16:15
What I said was if my friend responded, I'd probably give up. Otherwise, I'd try to talk it out.

Er.. still not sure what you mean then. Talk it out with the friend? or your SO?
DrunkenDove
08-08-2008, 16:29
They shouldn't tell you. Ever.
Conserative Morality
08-08-2008, 17:55
Just remember that a sense of humor can't get rabies.

I disagree.:eek2:
Ashmoria
08-08-2008, 20:38
yeah id want to know.

if we are an actual couple his actions reflect on me. i dont need to be talked about behind my back over something i dont know anything about.
Johnny B Goode
08-08-2008, 22:56
Er.. still not sure what you mean then. Talk it out with the friend? or your SO?

SO. But maybe both.